Bent Cop: Johnny Takes Out The Trash

by Johnny Two Kebabs, Kieran Mc Kenna (Editor)

Is it Stalin's Soviet Union? Pol Pot's Cambodia? Kim Jong Il's North Korea? Incredibly, it's twenty-first-century London.

In a monstrous twist of fate, Johnny has been targeted by the local council, who believe that he no longer has the right to claim unemployment benefits unless he can "provide proof of actively searching for gainful employment."

However, this is merely the beginning of the misfortunes that befall Johnny. Not only is his best friend murdered, but he also has to contemplate the real possibility of full-time employment.

In a desperate race against time to prevent his unemployment benefits from being cut off, Johnny becomes instrumental in helping to purge London's Metropolitan Police of the corruption rife within its ranks.

166 pages, Kindle Edition

Published January 13, 2026

About the author

On 15th June 2011, in Achmed’s kebab shop in south London, an extraordinary achievement took place. An Irishman (after already having imbibed thirteen pints of lager) polished off two doner kebabs in the record time of one minute 59 seconds - a feat which has remained unbeaten to this day.
Now the protagonist in this accomplishment shares with us his adventures in bringing order into the chaos of south London.