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My Ass Is Haunted By The Gay Unicorn Colonel
Roger is a ghost hunter on a quest to know if his long lost lover is still out there somewhere. His travels eventually bring him to a bed and breakfast in Georgia, where there have been several sightings of a ghostly unicorn colonel who fought and died during The Civil War.
But when Roger encounters the gay ghost for himself, he soon finds out that there is more at play than just a routine haunting. This spirit is here to deliver a message from Roger’s dead unicorn lover, and it’s a message of gay, erotic pleasure that will shake Roger to his very core.
This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay unicorn ghost action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and unicorn colonel love.
But when Roger encounters the gay ghost for himself, he soon finds out that there is more at play than just a routine haunting. This spirit is here to deliver a message from Roger’s dead unicorn lover, and it’s a message of gay, erotic pleasure that will shake Roger to his very core.
This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay unicorn ghost action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and unicorn colonel love.
38 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 19, 2015
5 people are currently reading
198 people want to read
About the author
Chuck Tingle
508 books4,799 followersChuck Tingle is a mysterious force of energy behind sunglasses and a pink mask. He is also an anonymous author of romance, horror, and fantasy. Chuck was born in Home of Truth, Utah, and now splits time between Billings, Montana and Los Angeles, California. Chuck writes to prove love is real, because love is the most important tool we have when resisting the endless cosmic void. Not everything people say about Chuck is true, but the important parts are.
Management and general inquiry: infotingleverse@gmail.com
Literary agent: DongWon at dongwonsong.com
Management and general inquiry: infotingleverse@gmail.com
Literary agent: DongWon at dongwonsong.com
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews
January 26, 2015
Bask in the motherfucking greatness that is a unicorn soldier!
*nods in awe*
Unicorn BR w/ Ann and Cupcake
Chucky Chuck Chuck, what the actual motherfuck?
Dude.
Guy.
Person.
Listen. You're listening? I think you are. So read this: you think you're good with the dino stuff (and you are) but you succeed with uniporn.
It's like there. And I'm here. You're bringing me there. WTF? I am still laughing and aroused at the same time and it's like however many "Tinglers" from you. Your plots? *smh* A Civil War unicorn soldier ghost?
It's like I get a hand delivered gift a la:
from Dr. Tingle. I appreciate it.
I hate ghost stories, erotica, romance, whatever, but for Chucky Chuck Chuck, I read. And enjoyed myself.
Chuck Tingle delivered a hot little PWP set in Georgia at a haunted B & B that is inhabited by not just a regular ghost. Fuck that. Chuck Tingle came to mingle, so it's haunted by a civil war unicorn soldier by the name of "COLONEL PEACH" (Sup Peachy)
Roger is mourning his dead unicorn lover Paulo and is searching for a sign from the great glittery stable in the sky. And it cums. How? In the form of 2 unicorn ghosts, Paulo and Colonel Peach.
And Colonel Peach isn't here to leave glitter trails, gum drops and candy sticks...wait...well maybe if candy stick is a major D for the monster cock he's packing betwixt his legs. And Roger, the lovely recipient got that packaged delivered into his fuck chute. HARD!
My face while reading this gem:
Oh the quotes. The laughs. The Tingle.
Not as kinky as his others, this one was different because it featured 'topping from the bottom' from the HUMAN. I love that! Roger trying to hop onto the magnificent unicorn staff. Finally the humans a little more in there, if you catch my drift.
Don't worry, Colonel Peach came to his senses and brought that fuck truck to Pound Town in the end.
#oopshetingledagain #unipornisalwaywinning #ChuckyChuckChuckedHARD #BOOM #unicornsslapdatass #watchittingle #4-5stars #doitforPaulo
*nods in awe*
Unicorn BR w/ Ann and Cupcake
Chucky Chuck Chuck, what the actual motherfuck?
Dude.
Guy.
Person.
Listen. You're listening? I think you are. So read this: you think you're good with the dino stuff (and you are) but you succeed with uniporn.
It's like there. And I'm here. You're bringing me there. WTF? I am still laughing and aroused at the same time and it's like however many "Tinglers" from you. Your plots? *smh* A Civil War unicorn soldier ghost?
It's like I get a hand delivered gift a la:
from Dr. Tingle. I appreciate it.
I hate ghost stories, erotica, romance, whatever, but for Chucky Chuck Chuck, I read. And enjoyed myself.
Chuck Tingle delivered a hot little PWP set in Georgia at a haunted B & B that is inhabited by not just a regular ghost. Fuck that. Chuck Tingle came to mingle, so it's haunted by a civil war unicorn soldier by the name of "COLONEL PEACH" (Sup Peachy)
Roger is mourning his dead unicorn lover Paulo and is searching for a sign from the great glittery stable in the sky. And it cums. How? In the form of 2 unicorn ghosts, Paulo and Colonel Peach.
“I have come here to deliver a message from beyond. I have come to bring you a message from Paulo.”
The sound of my dead lovers name causes my heart to skip a beat. “What is it?” I stammer. “Tell me.”
As I say the words I can feel a slight tingling begin deep within my ass, in a place that only Paulo could reach with his massive unicorn cock. In this moment I realize that Paulo’s spirit is inside of me, haunting my ass.
“Paulo has a message from the great beyond.” The unicorn colonel tells me. “A message of passion and fire, a message of love.”
“I can feel it.”
And Colonel Peach isn't here to leave glitter trails, gum drops and candy sticks...wait...well maybe if candy stick is a major D for the monster cock he's packing betwixt his legs. And Roger, the lovely recipient got that packaged delivered into his fuck chute. HARD!
“I can feel him deep within my butt.”
The unicorn colonel nods. “Yes, but he’s always been there, haunting your ass while you worked, slept… cried.”
My face while reading this gem:
Oh the quotes. The laughs. The Tingle.
Not as kinky as his others, this one was different because it featured 'topping from the bottom' from the HUMAN. I love that! Roger trying to hop onto the magnificent unicorn staff. Finally the humans a little more in there, if you catch my drift.
Don't worry, Colonel Peach came to his senses and brought that fuck truck to Pound Town in the end.
#oopshetingledagain #unipornisalwaywinning #ChuckyChuckChuckedHARD #BOOM #unicornsslapdatass #watchittingle #4-5stars #doitforPaulo
December 6, 2015
Finally found the time to read this and I'm disappointed. It's really not the quality work I'm used to from the Tingler.
The story is about Roger, a gay human male that's interested in the afterlife since his unicorn lover, Paulo, died. (I thought unicorns would have more majestic names, Tolkien style). He goes to a haunted B&B to hang with possible ghosts.
Lucky for him, Colonel Peach, a Civil War era unicorn does haunt the place. And that night, he comes to deliver a message from Paulo.
The message? You thought you were all alone, false, Paulo haunts your ass. Literally, his anal cavity is the boardinghouse for his dead unicorn lover's ghost. Nothing says soulmates like haunting your lover's anal tract and intestines, hey, maybe even his stomach. I don't know how much room a unicorn ghost requires in a human body.
Paulo, the dead lover, doesn't have enough power yet to manifest a spectral body, like Col. Unicorn, so in his steed (bazinga), the Col. is going to ride Roger's ass - in the name of love, of course. Saddle up. Civil War unicorn ghost and human get their freak on. The end.
No bridles, reins, stirrups, or saddles were involved, just the classic unicorn on human banging. This just didn't live up to Mr. Tingler's dinorotica. Maybe unicorotica (unicornrotica?) isn't his strong suit.
On to the next one.
___________________________________
Buddy Read with Jess, Aileene, Daniella, Shelly, Sarah, and possibly more?
Starts today, December 3rd.
The story is about Roger, a gay human male that's interested in the afterlife since his unicorn lover, Paulo, died. (I thought unicorns would have more majestic names, Tolkien style). He goes to a haunted B&B to hang with possible ghosts.
Lucky for him, Colonel Peach, a Civil War era unicorn does haunt the place. And that night, he comes to deliver a message from Paulo.
The message? You thought you were all alone, false, Paulo haunts your ass. Literally, his anal cavity is the boardinghouse for his dead unicorn lover's ghost. Nothing says soulmates like haunting your lover's anal tract and intestines, hey, maybe even his stomach. I don't know how much room a unicorn ghost requires in a human body.
Paulo, the dead lover, doesn't have enough power yet to manifest a spectral body, like Col. Unicorn, so in his steed (bazinga), the Col. is going to ride Roger's ass - in the name of love, of course. Saddle up. Civil War unicorn ghost and human get their freak on. The end.
No bridles, reins, stirrups, or saddles were involved, just the classic unicorn on human banging. This just didn't live up to Mr. Tingler's dinorotica. Maybe unicorotica (unicornrotica?) isn't his strong suit.
On to the next one.
___________________________________
Buddy Read with Jess, Aileene, Daniella, Shelly, Sarah, and possibly more?
Starts today, December 3rd.
December 10, 2015
Oh wowser.
This is possibly the most absurd Tingler yet. Roger used to have a gay unicorn lover, but he died. *insert sad face here* For some reason (?) he is staying at a B&B in Georgia that is haunted by a ghost unicorn Colonel from the Civil War (??) Roger sees the unicorn ghost and realizes....
Roger and the ghost unicorn Colonel then get down and dirty. The Colonel was hesitant at first and Roger took the reigns by saying
And what follows is much talk about gay assholes, soulful gay eyes, handsome gay faces and basically any adjective that can have gay added in front of it is used while they bang and say naughty shit to each other.
I'm a bit sad there was no catch phrase in this one, I hope that in the other unicorn ones there is a catch phrase - uni-cock anyone?
This had editing errors, but that is pretty standard for a Tingler.
Not my favorite Tingler. Bring on the gangbang by the unicorn football team.
2 little-human-twink Stars
Thanks for the impromptu buddy read Kate, Aileene, Shelly, Sarah and Daniella !
"Back in those days unicorn and human relationships were looked down upon, but we didn't care."
This is possibly the most absurd Tingler yet. Roger used to have a gay unicorn lover, but he died. *insert sad face here* For some reason (?) he is staying at a B&B in Georgia that is haunted by a ghost unicorn Colonel from the Civil War (??) Roger sees the unicorn ghost and realizes....
"I can feel a slight tingling begin deep within my ass, in a place that only Paulo could reach with his massive unicorn cock. In this moment I realize that Paulo's spirit is inside of me, haunting my ass."
Roger and the ghost unicorn Colonel then get down and dirty. The Colonel was hesitant at first and Roger took the reigns by saying
"Do you want me to suck off that big, fat, unicorn cock of yours?"
And what follows is much talk about gay assholes, soulful gay eyes, handsome gay faces and basically any adjective that can have gay added in front of it is used while they bang and say naughty shit to each other.
I'm a bit sad there was no catch phrase in this one, I hope that in the other unicorn ones there is a catch phrase - uni-cock anyone?
This had editing errors, but that is pretty standard for a Tingler.
Not my favorite Tingler. Bring on the gangbang by the unicorn football team.
2 little-human-twink Stars
Thanks for the impromptu buddy read Kate, Aileene, Shelly, Sarah and Daniella !
Read
July 27, 2016► BR with Kate, Shelly, Jess, the MacHalo Freaks, and a-bunch-of-other-people-I-don't-know-but-who-are-probably-pretty-since-they're-willing-to-get-all-Tingly, starting Dec. 3, 2015.
Dr Tingle, you awesome Tae Kwon Do grandmaster and holistic massage god, it's been too long. We've missed you.
Blah blah blah thread.
Dr Tingle, you awesome Tae Kwon Do grandmaster and holistic massage god, it's been too long. We've missed you.
Blah blah blah thread.
January 26, 2015
So I think. . . .
No, no, I know, that MAGIC just happened.
I learned many things in this epic tale of love and loss. But the most important thing to remember is this; even if you've lost your Spanish Unicorn soulmate to a congenital heart defect, never give up hope, for he will haunt your ass (literally) and send a Unicorn Civil War hero to deliver a message of everlasting love to you via his ghostly, jutting, enormous unicorn shaft.
Message received my friend. Message received.
"In this moment, I know that Paulo is with me, haunting my ass with Colonel Peach."
Peachy Pretty Lashes has the biggest crush on Colonel Peach right now.
No, no, I know, that MAGIC just happened.
I learned many things in this epic tale of love and loss. But the most important thing to remember is this; even if you've lost your Spanish Unicorn soulmate to a congenital heart defect, never give up hope, for he will haunt your ass (literally) and send a Unicorn Civil War hero to deliver a message of everlasting love to you via his ghostly, jutting, enormous unicorn shaft.
Message received my friend. Message received.
"In this moment, I know that Paulo is with me, haunting my ass with Colonel Peach."
Peachy Pretty Lashes has the biggest crush on Colonel Peach right now.
January 26, 2015
Unicorn BR about ghost unicorn. Excuse me, Colonel ghost unicorn with Baby & Peachy!
Because Unicorn.
Ever seen the movie Grease 2? Remember the "Let's do it for our country" song? I'm just saying I think ole Colonel Peach had an ulterior motive.
I mean who can resist:
What a sweet talker Roger is with his "chiseled face" and his "ripped muscular body". That is one powerful concoction. One, evidently, clear as day from the parking lot when Colonel Peach was eyeballing him through the windows.
I know what you're up to, Colonel Peach.
Just reeling him in with your sexy civil war uniform and all your talk about wanting to help him re-connect with his ghostly ex, Paulo.
Lured that little twink ass in and drove him to Pound Town. I can dig it. Powerful concoction is powerful and begs to be bent over. Got him all hooked on the Unicock again knowing he'd be back for more.
Uh huh.
I hope next time Colonel Peach makes that little twink beg for the unicock.
It's official. I've been Tinglered and I loved it.
Sequel please, Dr. Tingletastic.
Because Unicorn.
Ever seen the movie Grease 2? Remember the "Let's do it for our country" song? I'm just saying I think ole Colonel Peach had an ulterior motive.
I mean who can resist:
“Harder!” I scream back at him, never more turned on my entire life. “Fuck me harder like the little human twink that I am!”
“Cum all over me!” I demand fiercely. “Shoot that load all over this handsome gay face of mine!”
What a sweet talker Roger is with his "chiseled face" and his "ripped muscular body". That is one powerful concoction. One, evidently, clear as day from the parking lot when Colonel Peach was eyeballing him through the windows.
I know what you're up to, Colonel Peach.
Just reeling him in with your sexy civil war uniform and all your talk about wanting to help him re-connect with his ghostly ex, Paulo.
Lured that little twink ass in and drove him to Pound Town. I can dig it. Powerful concoction is powerful and begs to be bent over. Got him all hooked on the Unicock again knowing he'd be back for more.
Uh huh.
I hope next time Colonel Peach makes that little twink beg for the unicock.
It's official. I've been Tinglered and I loved it.
Sequel please, Dr. Tingletastic.
September 12, 2016
Mr. Tingle rides again; this time atop a ghostly gay unicorn. I'm in love.
September 3, 2016
Omg...
*fails to contain laughter*
Ridiculous fun :)
*still laughing*
I can't even pick a favorite quote because I highlighted too many brilliant sentences.
Genius.
*fails to contain laughter*
Ridiculous fun :)
*still laughing*
I can't even pick a favorite quote because I highlighted too many brilliant sentences.
Genius.
December 4, 2015
I didn't realise that our BR was just to read one story.
The book that I have, had all the 3 titles:
Taken By The Unicorn Biker
My Ass Is Haunted By The Gay Unicorn Colonel
Pounded By The Unicorn Football Squad
And since the whole book (with the 3 titles) had just less than 200 pages, so, off, I read----- ALL THREE
~~~~~~~~~~~
30 minutes later.
Trying so hard not to be the glass half empty kind of shiela here but. Mr. Chuck. Tingle. WTF?!
I am such a visual person. I totally don't need this in my head.
Had my mum and Nanna heard the series of expletives I verbalized (and believe me there were lots of 'em and my mouth FROTHED from saying em all) they would've have washed my mouth out with soap, lit candles and offered novena prayers to all the saints they knew to redeem my soul.
These stories, they might be...
No. Just no. I'm stopping my review here.
==================================
4.12.15 morning
BR with KATE, JESS, DANIELLA & SHELLY starting today 4.12.15
The book that I have, had all the 3 titles:
Taken By The Unicorn Biker
My Ass Is Haunted By The Gay Unicorn Colonel
Pounded By The Unicorn Football Squad
And since the whole book (with the 3 titles) had just less than 200 pages, so, off, I read----- ALL THREE
~~~~~~~~~~~
30 minutes later.
Trying so hard not to be the glass half empty kind of shiela here but. Mr. Chuck. Tingle. WTF?!
I am such a visual person. I totally don't need this in my head.
Had my mum and Nanna heard the series of expletives I verbalized (and believe me there were lots of 'em and my mouth FROTHED from saying em all) they would've have washed my mouth out with soap, lit candles and offered novena prayers to all the saints they knew to redeem my soul.
These stories, they might be...
No. Just no. I'm stopping my review here.
==================================
4.12.15 morning
BR with KATE, JESS, DANIELLA & SHELLY starting today 4.12.15
Want to read
January 27, 2015Bro rec'd this to me. Man, she's the shit. Without her I'd read totally uncool, much less cool things.
Never leave me.
Never.
Never leave me.
Never.
February 12, 2020
This heartwarming story touched on deep themes like war, prejudice, and the persistence of love against all odds. However, I wished the titular Gay Unicorn Colonel had been a more fleshed out character (or, that the character had more meat, as one might say). I found myself wishing for more of his backstory - what role did he play in the war and what deep regret or unfinished business has kept him on earth to haunt this B&B?
February 18, 2020
Normally the good Doctor Tingle warrants 5 stars only but this one was a little lacking near the rear end for me. I picked this one up for some quick n dirty education about civil war era ghosts—that part was great—it's just... honestly I was hoping for a stronger development of the ass in question.
While, yes, the work did stand and deliver on the promises of the title, I just didn't feel as touched by this one as some of his other works. Perhaps it needed a hot billionaire or an airplane. Really I'm not one to question the expert author.
You know, I actually think I'm deducting a star simply because I can't fathom the full genius at work. That's my fault. Back to 5 stars you go little unicorn.
EDIT: Re-read, back to 4/5 because no hot billionaires.
While, yes, the work did stand and deliver on the promises of the title, I just didn't feel as touched by this one as some of his other works. Perhaps it needed a hot billionaire or an airplane. Really I'm not one to question the expert author.
You know, I actually think I'm deducting a star simply because I can't fathom the full genius at work. That's my fault. Back to 5 stars you go little unicorn.
EDIT: Re-read, back to 4/5 because no hot billionaires.
February 18, 2020
I deducted a star because the titular ass in question belongs to the main character's Spanish unicorn lover, Paolo, not the ghost, Colonel Peach. I expect Dr. Tingle to get the little details right.
That aside, this is a powerful tale of timeless love, complete with man-on-ghost-unicorn action.
(Read this for a book club "after dark" event, and it's going to be a fun discussion)
That aside, this is a powerful tale of timeless love, complete with man-on-ghost-unicorn action.
(Read this for a book club "after dark" event, and it's going to be a fun discussion)
May 5, 2015
This definitely qualifies as WTF did I just read. But, well, it was pretty freakin' hysterical with lots of steamy wrongness.
There is so much smut out there, it's nice to find an author that decides to have fun with it and not take it so seriously.
A fun quick read & available on Kindle Unlimited.
There is so much smut out there, it's nice to find an author that decides to have fun with it and not take it so seriously.
A fun quick read & available on Kindle Unlimited.
March 2, 2015
Didn't read it so much as listened to a couple friends read it, but it's ridiculous enough to say I did read it. It's just hilariously bad, but in ridiculously fun way. I kinda want to read his other whacked stories.
Want to read
February 7, 2015This is one of the best awful books I've ever read.
July 12, 2017
OMG I read this to my wife as a joke, we could NOT stop laughing. also the bonus novel, Reamed by my Reaction to the Title of this Book. was just as amazing.
Read
October 31, 2023I am not okay
July 25, 2024
very entertaining & a real bonding experience if you listen to it with your best friend!
July 25, 2024
I would HIGHLY recommend the podcast where celebrities read the Chuck Tingle stories. It was hilarious.
November 12, 2024
Surprised that I was surprised by the beastiality element of this story….. did I even read the title? Does the phrase love is love apply here?
Note to self: Do not listen to this in the office 😏(tucks hair behind ear)
Note to self: Do not listen to this in the office 😏(tucks hair behind ear)
October 4, 2025
Not my favorite Tingler - not especially memorable (she says about a book that’s got dead gay unicorn colonel sex)
February 21, 2015
Looking at the other ratings for this short story, I stand alone in my judgement.
I congratulate this writer for finding a way to get noticed, hopefully to gain a following for cooler books in the future. Personally I felt short changed as for most of this tale I was treated with a sex scene. And sex between a unicorn and a twink is not erotic. Yeah, I get the joke. I got it in the title. That sparked my curiosity. But that's where the humour stopped.
It's not right to criticise a book for what it's not, so excuse me, but I was looking forward to witty comedy with an absurd twist. Let's face it, this is a title ripe for laughs. Even the premise of this sex scene can lead to delicious complications. What delightful tricks can be sought from the unicorn's horn? Did his mane tickle? Imagine what his tongue could do.
What about unicorn magic? Mystical sexual wishes? Old world unicorn language. Imagine if the old woman sprung them in the act? So much could have happened but didn't.
His writing is fine. Now give us a story.
I congratulate this writer for finding a way to get noticed, hopefully to gain a following for cooler books in the future. Personally I felt short changed as for most of this tale I was treated with a sex scene. And sex between a unicorn and a twink is not erotic. Yeah, I get the joke. I got it in the title. That sparked my curiosity. But that's where the humour stopped.
It's not right to criticise a book for what it's not, so excuse me, but I was looking forward to witty comedy with an absurd twist. Let's face it, this is a title ripe for laughs. Even the premise of this sex scene can lead to delicious complications. What delightful tricks can be sought from the unicorn's horn? Did his mane tickle? Imagine what his tongue could do.
What about unicorn magic? Mystical sexual wishes? Old world unicorn language. Imagine if the old woman sprung them in the act? So much could have happened but didn't.
His writing is fine. Now give us a story.
December 14, 2023
Missing star is just for the missing prep, it bugs me. Please use lube when fucking unicorn ghosts
January 17, 2022
Weirdly, I think my problem with this one is that I was too interested in the plot. Let me explain. I loooove a ghost story. I love creepy haunted houses with little paranormal events happening in them, frightening the narrator and the reader. I love meeting the ghosts who haunt these houses and learning more about them, what happened to them and why they are still here. As such, I was absolutely vibing with this setup: the creepiness of the old plantation house, the protagonist who wanted to prove the afterlife was real so he could know his dead former lover was still out there somewhere, the kind but spooky old lady who owns this haunted plantation. I was especially excited when we met the unicorn colonel who haunts the place, because I wanted to learn more about his backstory, his life and death fighting for the Union during the Civil War. (Sidenote: yay for having him be a Union solder instead of a Confederate. It's more than Twilight or The Vampire Diaries ever gave us. Sidenote to the sidenote, what is this alternate history where unicorns fought in the Civil War? I want to know more about that too.) Ultimately, however, we don't really get much more information about Colonel Peach than what I've already said in this review, so when the smut commenced, I just found myself wanting more backstory instead.
Basically I want My Ass is Haunted By The Gay Unicorn Colonel to be reimagined as gothic horror, is what I'm saying.
Basically I want My Ass is Haunted By The Gay Unicorn Colonel to be reimagined as gothic horror, is what I'm saying.
July 25, 2025
Got this as a birthday present. It's like the book equivalent of "Walking on Sunshine"--instant happiness as soon as it starts. Best enjoyed reading aloud with a group, preferably in the most serious, gravest voice you can manage.
August 23, 2018
What can I say, I love a bed and breakfast setting.
Read
February 24, 2020Exactly what it says on the tin. Don't act shocked or appalled, you know exactly what you're getting into.
April 17, 2022
😭😭💀 ded
August 15, 2024
I'll never rate a Tingler less than five stars.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 32 reviews