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ClownFellas: Tales of the Binzo Family
“Carlton Mellick III goes past silly, through weird, detours around dumb, blasts through bizarre, and gets to a place where the normal physics of narrative no longer apply. You will never be the same.”—Cory Doctorow, author of Little Brother and HomelandIn a topsy-turvy world where clowns are killers and crooks, Little Bigtop is a three-ring circus of crime, and no syndicate is more dangerous than the Binzo family. From the wildly original mind of Carlton Mellick III comes the short-story collection ClownFellas—an epic mob saga where life is cheap and the gags will slay you.For years, the hard-boiled capos of the Binzo family have run all of the funny business in Little Bigtop, from the clown brothels to the illegal comedy trade. But hard times have befallen the Binzos now that Le Mystère, the French clown Mafia, has started moving in and trying to take over the city. If that weren’t enough, they’ve got to deal with the cops, the Feds, the snitches, the carnies, the mysterious hit man Mr. Pogo, and the mutant clowns over in the Sideshow district. With the odds stacked against them, the Binzos must fight to survive . . . or die laughing.Praise for ClownFellas“Mario Puzo meets Barnum & Bailey . . . You just can’t look away as the ridiculousness escalates.”—Publishers Weekly“The most original novelist working today? The most outrageous? The most unpredictable? These aren’t easy superlatives to make; however, Carlton Mellick may well be all of those things, behind a canon of books that all irreverently depart from the form and concepts of traditional novels, and adventure the reader into a howling, dark fantasyland of the most bizarre, over-the-top, and mind-warping inventiveness. In my opinion, ClownFellas is his best work to date.”—Edward Lee, author of City Infernal and Header“I rarely enjoy clowns—which is ironic since I’ve been one for over four decades—but ClownFellas is great on so many levels, irony being one of them. What can I say besides I love it! Great read, and funny as hell . . . I have been accused of being unfunny before, and after the trial I had to enter the Witless Protection Program. This is funny!”
—Barry Lubin, aka Grandma, longtime Big Apple Circus clown
“If Martin Scorsese and Ronald McDonald had a baby, this would be it. . . . Each story is clever, multi-layered, and filled with witty dialogue. . . . A must-read.”—This Is Horror “Mellick’s writing is wonderfully descriptive and wildly imaginative. . . . I was utterly delighted, amused, and engrossed. . . . ClownFellas is a gem!”—The Qwillery “A rollercoaster ride through a strange world that borders on our own reality . . . a story that is just as difficult to define as it is to put down.”—Examiner.com “Mellick has created another amazing read. . . . Highly recommended.
457 pages, Kindle Edition
First published July 14, 2015
31 people are currently reading
336 people want to read
About the author
Carlton Mellick III
121 books2,187 followersCarlton Mellick III (July 2, 1977, Phoenix, Arizona) is an American author currently residing in Portland, Oregon. He calls his style of writing "avant-punk," and is currently one of the leading authors in the recent 'Bizarro' movement in underground literature[citation needed] with Steve Aylett, Chris Genoa and D. Harlan Wilson.
Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock sci-fi/horror and postmodern literary art. His novels explore surreal versions of earth in contemporary society and imagined futures, commonly focusing on social absurdities and satire.
Carlton Mellick III started writing at the age of ten and completed twelve novels by the age of eighteen. Only one of these early novels, "Electric Jesus Corpse", ever made it to print.
He is best known for his first novel Satan Burger and its sequel Punk Land. Satan Burger was translated into Russian and published by Ultra Culture in 2005. It was part of a four book series called Brave New World, which also featured Virtual Light by William Gibson, City Come A Walkin by John Shirley, and Tea from an Empty Cup by Pat Cadigan.
In the late 90's, he formed a collective for offbeat authors which included D. Harlan Wilson, Kevin L. Donihe, Vincent Sakowski, among others, and the publishing company Eraserhead Press. This scene evolved into the Bizarro fiction movement in 2005.
In addition to writing, Mellick is an artist and musician.
Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock sci-fi/horror and postmodern literary art. His novels explore surreal versions of earth in contemporary society and imagined futures, commonly focusing on social absurdities and satire.
Carlton Mellick III started writing at the age of ten and completed twelve novels by the age of eighteen. Only one of these early novels, "Electric Jesus Corpse", ever made it to print.
He is best known for his first novel Satan Burger and its sequel Punk Land. Satan Burger was translated into Russian and published by Ultra Culture in 2005. It was part of a four book series called Brave New World, which also featured Virtual Light by William Gibson, City Come A Walkin by John Shirley, and Tea from an Empty Cup by Pat Cadigan.
In the late 90's, he formed a collective for offbeat authors which included D. Harlan Wilson, Kevin L. Donihe, Vincent Sakowski, among others, and the publishing company Eraserhead Press. This scene evolved into the Bizarro fiction movement in 2005.
In addition to writing, Mellick is an artist and musician.
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August 20, 2021
"Do you even know what your dad does for a living?"
"Yeah, he's a clownfella," Jimmy said.
Jojo laughed even harder.
"Do you even know what that means?"
"It means nobody messes with him."
That's right. In Little Bigtop, NOBODY messes with the Bozo family . . . until the French clown mafia starts muscling in on the action. Mellick takes a traditional tale of warring families and turns it sideways, with clowns on unicycles tossing Molotov cocktails, and big-shoed goodfellas flinging explosive cream pies.
If you like your novels fast, furious, and funny, this one's for you. (Unless you have coulrophobia, of course.)
I may never look at a Scorsese film the same way again . . .
"How could you not laugh at that? Was my joke not good enough for you?"
Earl shrugged.
Hats leaned in closer.
"You don't think I'm funny? Is that it? What, am I not a clown to you?"
"Yeah, he's a clownfella," Jimmy said.
Jojo laughed even harder.
"Do you even know what that means?"
"It means nobody messes with him."
That's right. In Little Bigtop, NOBODY messes with the Bozo family . . . until the French clown mafia starts muscling in on the action. Mellick takes a traditional tale of warring families and turns it sideways, with clowns on unicycles tossing Molotov cocktails, and big-shoed goodfellas flinging explosive cream pies.
If you like your novels fast, furious, and funny, this one's for you. (Unless you have coulrophobia, of course.)
I may never look at a Scorsese film the same way again . . .
"How could you not laugh at that? Was my joke not good enough for you?"
Earl shrugged.
Hats leaned in closer.
"You don't think I'm funny? Is that it? What, am I not a clown to you?"
May 31, 2015
Carlton Mellick III is one of the leading authors of bizarro fiction and in his own words ‘pumps out some of the weirdest, trashiest, most imaginative books’ you'll ever admit to being a guilty pleasure. A prolific author with over 40 books in print, freaky titles such as The Haunted Vagina, Clusterfuck, Adolf in Wonderland, Baby Jesus Butt Plug and Razor Wire Pubic Hair comprise some of his back catalogue. Well worth checking his website out to see how tapped this guy actually is and you simply can't help being drawn in by some of the books on offer, he's also got a set of the most wicked sideburns I've ever seen.
Clownfellas is one of his latest offerings and it’s for the most part set in Little Bigtop, New York’s infamous clown neighbourhood. Clowns are real, they're not entirely human and they've got some of the best weaponry you could imagine.
Little Bigtop is run by the Bozo crime family, clown mafia if you like and we follow various members of the Bozo clan in offshoot stories that all kind of collide in a big family wedding. Stories include capo Vinnie Blue Nose and his brush with the ever warring French clowns, Le Mystère, as he tries to protect the temperamental boss’s son Jimmy Bozo.
Pinky Smiles, the smiling clown, no creepy maniac clown smile neither he actually possessed a pleasant smile and he's about to propose to his girl, daughter of Don Bozo's brother. Not everything goes to plan for Pinky though, he's been set-up and there's a deadly assassin heading his way.
And finally before the calamitous wedding we have the brilliantly unfuckingkillable, Bingo Ballbreaker who wakes up in a pool of blood with a bullet hole in the back of his head. Girlfriends gone and so is his must precious possession, his Ilario Sperrazza violin.
To the fantastic weaponry available to a clown, there's toy store—slinky bombs, bladed frisbees, chainsaw yo-yos, an assortment of weaponized pies and cartoony handguns, Weapons-grade itching powder, suicidal bullets, flower seed bullets, happy bullets, balloon knives, you name it and they've got it.
"I once saw a guy OD on this stuff,” Winky said, giggling at the thought. “He laughed so hard his head exploded".
How do you become a clown, well you're either born that way, a pure clown or an injection of happy juice. If you risk the injection, there's a 10% chance you'll go loopy beyond repair, minds and bodies would become malformed and distorted. A Sideshow Freak.
The author writes in a simplistic, easy to read style that drags you along by the short ‘n’ curlies, it's all tongue in cheek and a touch surreal but it just works, good fun, excellent premise and I think I'll be returning quite soon to Carlton Mellick III's back catalogue, probably with Apeshit.
Clownfellas is due for release on the 17 July.
A 3.5* rating
Also posted at http://paulnelson.booklikes.com/post/...
Clownfellas is one of his latest offerings and it’s for the most part set in Little Bigtop, New York’s infamous clown neighbourhood. Clowns are real, they're not entirely human and they've got some of the best weaponry you could imagine.
Little Bigtop is run by the Bozo crime family, clown mafia if you like and we follow various members of the Bozo clan in offshoot stories that all kind of collide in a big family wedding. Stories include capo Vinnie Blue Nose and his brush with the ever warring French clowns, Le Mystère, as he tries to protect the temperamental boss’s son Jimmy Bozo.
Pinky Smiles, the smiling clown, no creepy maniac clown smile neither he actually possessed a pleasant smile and he's about to propose to his girl, daughter of Don Bozo's brother. Not everything goes to plan for Pinky though, he's been set-up and there's a deadly assassin heading his way.
And finally before the calamitous wedding we have the brilliantly unfuckingkillable, Bingo Ballbreaker who wakes up in a pool of blood with a bullet hole in the back of his head. Girlfriends gone and so is his must precious possession, his Ilario Sperrazza violin.
To the fantastic weaponry available to a clown, there's toy store—slinky bombs, bladed frisbees, chainsaw yo-yos, an assortment of weaponized pies and cartoony handguns, Weapons-grade itching powder, suicidal bullets, flower seed bullets, happy bullets, balloon knives, you name it and they've got it.
"I once saw a guy OD on this stuff,” Winky said, giggling at the thought. “He laughed so hard his head exploded".
How do you become a clown, well you're either born that way, a pure clown or an injection of happy juice. If you risk the injection, there's a 10% chance you'll go loopy beyond repair, minds and bodies would become malformed and distorted. A Sideshow Freak.
The author writes in a simplistic, easy to read style that drags you along by the short ‘n’ curlies, it's all tongue in cheek and a touch surreal but it just works, good fun, excellent premise and I think I'll be returning quite soon to Carlton Mellick III's back catalogue, probably with Apeshit.
Clownfellas is due for release on the 17 July.
A 3.5* rating
Also posted at http://paulnelson.booklikes.com/post/...
August 29, 2015
In all fairness, I did expect clowns more in line of Pennywise from It than the clowns that were in this book. I thought I was reading a horror book, but it was too much humor for it to be called horror (in my opinion) I did like the Clown world and the characters. It was just not what I had expected and also, even though it had its charming moments, I just couldn't really find myself enjoying the whole book. Some parts were better than the other. But I must admit that even though I felt that it wasn't my kind of book wasn't it in any way bad. It was well written and I love the idea of a mafia type of family of clowns. I really liked Little Bigtop and its clown population. But I was just not totally taken with all the stories in the book.
The book has six parts, every part is independent, but they still are connected to the whole story. You can say that every part have a different character that's the focus of the story. I liked the first part best because it was a great introduction Little Bigtop and the Bozo crime family. Earl Berryman, a veterinarian, is on his way to help a lion for Don Bozo. The problem is that he is terrified of clowns. Great story, I love the ending. The rest was also ok, but the one that I felt really wasn’t that interesting to read was Funny Business with Buggy Buttons. You would think that everything going bad for Buttons all the time would be funny, but it just get’s annoying. The last part, the Wedding Day was also a bit weak, but at least the bridezilla made the story a bit fun. I was mostly quite tired of Uncle Jojo and his problems towards the end of the story.
I think Vinnie Blue Nose was the one I liked the best out of all the clowns. Captain Spotty was also alright and of course I must mention Bingo Ballbreaker, he may not be the smartest of all the clowns, but he sure is the hardest to kill.
Would I read more? Yes I would, now that I know that is more humor than horror. I just need to be in the right mood for more. And, I do hope if it will be more Clownfellas books that Vinne Blue Nose will be in it!
I received a copy of this book from the publisher for a blog tour at TLC Book Tours.
Review also posted on A Bookaholic Swede and It's a Mad Mad World
The book has six parts, every part is independent, but they still are connected to the whole story. You can say that every part have a different character that's the focus of the story. I liked the first part best because it was a great introduction Little Bigtop and the Bozo crime family. Earl Berryman, a veterinarian, is on his way to help a lion for Don Bozo. The problem is that he is terrified of clowns. Great story, I love the ending. The rest was also ok, but the one that I felt really wasn’t that interesting to read was Funny Business with Buggy Buttons. You would think that everything going bad for Buttons all the time would be funny, but it just get’s annoying. The last part, the Wedding Day was also a bit weak, but at least the bridezilla made the story a bit fun. I was mostly quite tired of Uncle Jojo and his problems towards the end of the story.
I think Vinnie Blue Nose was the one I liked the best out of all the clowns. Captain Spotty was also alright and of course I must mention Bingo Ballbreaker, he may not be the smartest of all the clowns, but he sure is the hardest to kill.
Would I read more? Yes I would, now that I know that is more humor than horror. I just need to be in the right mood for more. And, I do hope if it will be more Clownfellas books that Vinne Blue Nose will be in it!
I received a copy of this book from the publisher for a blog tour at TLC Book Tours.
Review also posted on A Bookaholic Swede and It's a Mad Mad World
July 24, 2015
Carlton Mellick III may be the most imaginative author writing today and this book doesn’t disappoint. It belongs to a new genre called bizarro fiction, which is exactly like it sounds. Like horror fiction where the primary component is fear, bizarro focuses on weirdness (like most of the titles from the cult movie section of an old school video store). And there’s no better genre for an imaginative author to be working in these days. There are no restrictions besides obeying the logic that’s associated with a particular setting, following a plot structure, and trying to make the story as entertaining as possible. And Mellick’s books are more entertaining than those of most other authors.
Bizarro is often mistaken for a subgenre of horror. Although the books are often horror, this isn’t always the case. They can utilize ANY genre and they’re usually absurd, surreal, and comedic (often dark). And most of them contain heavy elements of fantasy, but not all of them. For instance, besides being bizarro fiction, Clownfellas is a comedic crime fiction book with strong elements of fantasy.
Normally Mellick is a small press author and EXTREMELY prolific, usually releasing 4 books a year. This is his first book from one of the big top 5 publishers. Although it’s an E-book only release, it deserves a print edition.
The majority of his books are short novellas, while this release consists of 6 novellas with overlapping characters and plots. You can probably figure out what it’s about from the title: clown mobsters. And like all the best stories with criminal protagonists, Mellick makes them extremely likeable and often uses flashbacks to recount their pasts.
The concept that this book is based on is fantastic: Remember prohibition in 1920s America? Well, comedy has been declared illegal in this world instead of alcohol. Just as prohibition created much organized crime, the banning of comedy caused men to drink Happy Juice in order to transform themselves into clowns and provide comedy for the masses. Although they engage in other nefarious ways to make money, this seems to be their #1 source of income.
I highly recommend this book, particularly if you want to read something unlike anything you’ve ever read before (unless you’re already familiar with Mellick).
Bizarro is often mistaken for a subgenre of horror. Although the books are often horror, this isn’t always the case. They can utilize ANY genre and they’re usually absurd, surreal, and comedic (often dark). And most of them contain heavy elements of fantasy, but not all of them. For instance, besides being bizarro fiction, Clownfellas is a comedic crime fiction book with strong elements of fantasy.
Normally Mellick is a small press author and EXTREMELY prolific, usually releasing 4 books a year. This is his first book from one of the big top 5 publishers. Although it’s an E-book only release, it deserves a print edition.
The majority of his books are short novellas, while this release consists of 6 novellas with overlapping characters and plots. You can probably figure out what it’s about from the title: clown mobsters. And like all the best stories with criminal protagonists, Mellick makes them extremely likeable and often uses flashbacks to recount their pasts.
The concept that this book is based on is fantastic: Remember prohibition in 1920s America? Well, comedy has been declared illegal in this world instead of alcohol. Just as prohibition created much organized crime, the banning of comedy caused men to drink Happy Juice in order to transform themselves into clowns and provide comedy for the masses. Although they engage in other nefarious ways to make money, this seems to be their #1 source of income.
I highly recommend this book, particularly if you want to read something unlike anything you’ve ever read before (unless you’re already familiar with Mellick).
May 6, 2015
4.5*
Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
Mellick puts a new spin on mob life by creating a world where clowns are the kings of the criminal underworld. The six stories all link to the Bozo family, kingpins of Little Bigtop where they rule the illegal comedy clubs, clown brothels and laughing gas trade. With the French clown mob now muscling in on the action it's up to the clown capos to ensure that business is kept lucrative and any problems swiftly dealt with.
There's some great world building in this book, the author seems to have had all kinds of fun modifying aspects of mob life into a believable and engaging world. One where laughing bullets cause you to laugh yourself to death, hats and balloons are used as weapons and if you're not born a clown you can become one by drinking 'Happy Juice'.
Characters were a little bit hit and miss with Vinnie Blue Nose being by far my favourite clown and I wished he had featured more heavily in the stories. During the first story it was hard to keep track of all the different clowns but as the stories continued they stood out a lot more with Mellick giving some of them character growth.
Only one story wasn't as engaging, the story of Buggy Buttons was not up to the standard of the other stories, Buggy was not a likeable character and I ended up feeling impatient to get done with the story and back to the other clowns.
Mellick's has created another amazing read, it's a world that I hope we see more of in the future so I sincerely hope this is not the last we hear of Vinnie Blue Nose and co.
Highly recommended.
Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
Mellick puts a new spin on mob life by creating a world where clowns are the kings of the criminal underworld. The six stories all link to the Bozo family, kingpins of Little Bigtop where they rule the illegal comedy clubs, clown brothels and laughing gas trade. With the French clown mob now muscling in on the action it's up to the clown capos to ensure that business is kept lucrative and any problems swiftly dealt with.
There's some great world building in this book, the author seems to have had all kinds of fun modifying aspects of mob life into a believable and engaging world. One where laughing bullets cause you to laugh yourself to death, hats and balloons are used as weapons and if you're not born a clown you can become one by drinking 'Happy Juice'.
Characters were a little bit hit and miss with Vinnie Blue Nose being by far my favourite clown and I wished he had featured more heavily in the stories. During the first story it was hard to keep track of all the different clowns but as the stories continued they stood out a lot more with Mellick giving some of them character growth.
Only one story wasn't as engaging, the story of Buggy Buttons was not up to the standard of the other stories, Buggy was not a likeable character and I ended up feeling impatient to get done with the story and back to the other clowns.
Mellick's has created another amazing read, it's a world that I hope we see more of in the future so I sincerely hope this is not the last we hear of Vinnie Blue Nose and co.
Highly recommended.
May 9, 2015
I am not a fan of clowns, but what makes this book so great is that I was made to root for horrible characters (Jimmy Bozo).
ClownFellas: Tales of the Bozo Family is a collection of loosely connected six stories of a mobster family of clowns.
These are stories of rivalry (the French are trying to take over), colourful and original weapons (exploding pies, bullets that make people depressed or the ones that make people die of laughter and so on), murders, revenge, jealousy, betrayal, black humour and, weirdly enough, even love (the one that works for clowns anyway). Info-dumping is avoided through retrospective. The alternate past-present scenes/chapters clear up many issues. All the stories have one linchpin, my favourite character in the book - Vinnie Blue Nose.
I didn't really like Funny Business. I hated Buggy Buttons.
Clowns are either born or made by using Happy Juice. The unfortunate ones become monsters and end up in The Sideshow, the part of the city where even the toughest clowns fear to enter. That is only explored in one of the stories. I loved it.
Anyway, with the exception of Buggy's story I loved this crazy, over-the-top clownish take on Mafia.
Provided by Random House Publishing Group - Hydra via NetGalley.
ClownFellas: Tales of the Bozo Family is a collection of loosely connected six stories of a mobster family of clowns.
These are stories of rivalry (the French are trying to take over), colourful and original weapons (exploding pies, bullets that make people depressed or the ones that make people die of laughter and so on), murders, revenge, jealousy, betrayal, black humour and, weirdly enough, even love (the one that works for clowns anyway). Info-dumping is avoided through retrospective. The alternate past-present scenes/chapters clear up many issues. All the stories have one linchpin, my favourite character in the book - Vinnie Blue Nose.
I didn't really like Funny Business. I hated Buggy Buttons.
Clowns are either born or made by using Happy Juice. The unfortunate ones become monsters and end up in The Sideshow, the part of the city where even the toughest clowns fear to enter. That is only explored in one of the stories. I loved it.
Anyway, with the exception of Buggy's story I loved this crazy, over-the-top clownish take on Mafia.
Provided by Random House Publishing Group - Hydra via NetGalley.
October 12, 2015
4.5 stars
I think it broke into my top 5 Mellick stories. Not a huge fan of e readers, but this one is only for the e reader. (At least for the time being) Mellick hooked it up though for 99 cents for a limited time (from normal 5.99 price) so it was a no brainer purchase. He's been one of my favorite authors for years and one of the most original in the game.
I think it broke into my top 5 Mellick stories. Not a huge fan of e readers, but this one is only for the e reader. (At least for the time being) Mellick hooked it up though for 99 cents for a limited time (from normal 5.99 price) so it was a no brainer purchase. He's been one of my favorite authors for years and one of the most original in the game.
June 3, 2015
I would like to thank Netgalley and Random House Publishing Group for an ARC of this book.
I loved this book! It is one crazy ride with a mafia clown family. There are several stories about the different clowns in the Bozo Family or the clowns that work for them.
My favorite clowns are Vinnie Blue Nose, Hats Rizzo, Pinky Smiles, and Captain Spotty. Don Bozo is the boss of the family and he has one messed up, crazy clown son named Jimmy. He is in all sorts of trouble in this book. But it's great regardless.
They all live in Little BigTop. It's not just a carnival, they have houses, stores, run businesses, it's a whole other world that involves clowns. It's not just a clown book, it has real people in it as well.
The rival clown group is called, Le Mystere, they are a French clown gang. It's all so crazy but awesome at the same time!
Humans have the opportunity to try to become clowns by taking Happy Juice, but sometimes it don't work and it makes you a mutant instead of a clown. So you are carted off to another part of town where they live because they are very dangerous. I forget what their part of town is called though. Either way they are creepy.
There is a whole list of cool characters in this book and things that only clowns can do. I don't want to give away any spoilers. Let's just say if you want to read something very different and totally cool, here is your book. I had some great laughs even though there are plenty of mafia related activity as well.
Clown lovers with especially want to read this book.
www.melissa413readsalot.blogspot.com
I loved this book! It is one crazy ride with a mafia clown family. There are several stories about the different clowns in the Bozo Family or the clowns that work for them.
My favorite clowns are Vinnie Blue Nose, Hats Rizzo, Pinky Smiles, and Captain Spotty. Don Bozo is the boss of the family and he has one messed up, crazy clown son named Jimmy. He is in all sorts of trouble in this book. But it's great regardless.
They all live in Little BigTop. It's not just a carnival, they have houses, stores, run businesses, it's a whole other world that involves clowns. It's not just a clown book, it has real people in it as well.
The rival clown group is called, Le Mystere, they are a French clown gang. It's all so crazy but awesome at the same time!
Humans have the opportunity to try to become clowns by taking Happy Juice, but sometimes it don't work and it makes you a mutant instead of a clown. So you are carted off to another part of town where they live because they are very dangerous. I forget what their part of town is called though. Either way they are creepy.
There is a whole list of cool characters in this book and things that only clowns can do. I don't want to give away any spoilers. Let's just say if you want to read something very different and totally cool, here is your book. I had some great laughs even though there are plenty of mafia related activity as well.
Clown lovers with especially want to read this book.
www.melissa413readsalot.blogspot.com
July 28, 2015
REVIEW: CLOWNFELLAS by Carlton Mellick III
This is not a safe book for coulrophobics [sufferers from clown-phobia]. In real life, we can avoid circuses, carnivals, and certain fast-food establishments. Not so in the New York City of CLOWNFELLAS: here Clowns are not only real, they're a separate species--not a separate ethnicity or nationality, an entirely divergent species. They have their own city, Little Big Top, and as with any urban locale, ghettos and crime--and a clown Mafia. Imagine kneebreakers with bulbous red noses, wild green hair, size 30 shoes, and clothes crawling with cockroaches. [As an example.] Now further imagine you are a wild-animal veterinarian employed by a city zoo, summoned by the clown Don--and you're severely coulrophobic. Yeah--you get the picture.
This is not a safe book for coulrophobics [sufferers from clown-phobia]. In real life, we can avoid circuses, carnivals, and certain fast-food establishments. Not so in the New York City of CLOWNFELLAS: here Clowns are not only real, they're a separate species--not a separate ethnicity or nationality, an entirely divergent species. They have their own city, Little Big Top, and as with any urban locale, ghettos and crime--and a clown Mafia. Imagine kneebreakers with bulbous red noses, wild green hair, size 30 shoes, and clothes crawling with cockroaches. [As an example.] Now further imagine you are a wild-animal veterinarian employed by a city zoo, summoned by the clown Don--and you're severely coulrophobic. Yeah--you get the picture.
June 27, 2020
Carlton Mellick III introduced most readers to bizarro decades ago, and he’s one of the few who’s still carrying the torch. It seems like a lot of writers pass through bizarro on their way somewhere else. I think, for a while, bizarro was in the spot where horror movies where in the 70’s and 80’s.
If you were a young director back then, and you wanted to make a movie, a horror movie was the way to go. The locations were usually cheap (cabin in the woods, rundown farmhouse), the actors were usually first-timers (and sometimes last-timers), and because movies as dumb as Friday the 13th could make a shitload of money, studios didn’t have to get too involved, which was perfect for a director trying to show off their vision.
Maybe some of you don’t like that I called Friday the 13th stupid. But it’s pretty stupid. If you haven’t seen the original, I guess spoilers are coming. I wouldn’t normally worry about it, but I have to side with anyone who says that they started reading a review of a bizarro book filled with stories of a clown mafia, and they were surprised to find a spoiler for an old slasher. When I put it in words, it doesn’t even make sense. But here we are!
If you’re familiar, you probably know that the killer in the original Friday the 13th isn’t Jason, it’s Jason’s mom. She’s pissed off because camp counselors were “fornicating” and smoking wacky grass and doing whatever camp counselors do in these old movies. Based on the Friday the 13th movies I’ve seen (most of the first 4, plus Jason Goes to Hell like 17 times) camp counselor seemed like a good job if you wanted to spend a couple months drunk in the woods. And who doesn’t want to do that?
What’s dumb about the Jason’s mom thing is that we aren’t even aware of her as a character until the end of the movie. So it’s not like a viewer could watch and figure out who the killer was, and it’s not like a tension-builder, just wondering how one of the characters we’ve seen is getting away with all this.
Imagine a game of Clue, but at the end the murderer is Admiral Buttsecks, a character you didn’t even know was in the game until the end. Wouldn’t you feel cheated? Also, Colonel Mustard would probably be relieved that his ridiculous last name was overlooked because he was preceded in the military by someone with an even more ridiculous last name. And…is Colonel Mustard a real military colonel, or is he a Kentucky Colonel?
Googling…googling…
Okay, there’s a whole history. He’s usually a military colonel. But this search has put me on to some highlights from various versions of the game:
1996 UK: Similar to his 1949 counterpart, he is given an updated and more psychotic look. He wears a yellow tuxedo and is an expert in weapons and conspiracy.
A more psychotic look. Well, that’s really something.
1972 US: Portrayed in photograph as an elderly buffoon, wearing a tweed suit and sporting white fuzzy mutton chops and moustache. He wears a monocle for the first time and has an exaggerated uptight expression.
Hey, hey, hey. No buffoon wears a monocle. A gasbag, perhaps, a dilettante, MAYBE, but a buffoon?
2002 US: A more cubist rendition of 1996 US Mustard, Michael Mustard is a retired military man trying to pen his autobiography to supplement a dwindling income.
Ah, the 90’s and 2000’s, a time when someone could actually make a living by writing a book so we all had to pretend it was really difficult so we could keep everyone from getting in on the action.
Discover the Secrets: Col. Mustard had been completed reinvented as Jack Mustard, an ex-football player come sports pundit.
Well, that’s just dumb.
Back to Friday the 13th, having the killer be a character we haven’t seen is a total cop out.
Back to Clownfellas. Because this is, after all, a book review, not a movie review or board game review.
Oh, but first, a board game review: Clue sucks if your dad plays it with you, refuses to go easy on you because you’re a kid, and you have no fucking idea how those logic puzzles work and how the clues in the game could lead you to the killer.
Oh, and a movie review while we’re at it: I only saw Clue when I was young. All I remember is boobs. This is a boob-heavy movie with no actual nudity. Possibly one of the most salacious movies with no nudity in it that I’ve ever seen.
The Maid, obviously.
But then there’s Miss Scarlet.
Somewhere there’s a WAREHOUSE of footage where this character’s top just fell off, I guarantee it. Where is this warehouse? Heaven, as far as an adolescent Pete is concerned. Am I saying that an adolescent Pete would basically consider it heaven to watch 2-second clips of a lady topless? Forget laying around on clouds or reuniting with grandparents. “Look, it’s most of a boob!”
Clownfellas.
My first Carlton Mellick III was The Menstruating Mall. Menstruating is a hard word to spell. Like diarrhea. Why are all these words so hard to spell? It’s like every word that has to do with fluid ejection from the body, someone decided to make it hard to spell.
In the years that followed, I read lots of others like The Baby Jesus Butt Plug, Satan Burger, The Faggiest Vampire, Punk Land, Cuddly Holocaust…lots of others.
And then I read Quicksand House and Tumor Fruit in pretty short order, and I saw some growth. Haha, get it? Tumor? Growth?
Carlton Mellick III, somewhere along the line, had become a good writer. He was always interesting, always had great ideas, but he was a little like Philip K. Dick. I always liked Dick, but there were certainly moments in his books where you had to ignore some of the writing and stick with the story.
CMIII started writing better. His characters made you feel things. In Tumor Fruit, there was some tenderness. In Sausagey Santa, things were weird, and they were also truly hilarious.
Clownfellas might be his best.
The book is a series of stories tied together, all stories about the Binzo crime family. Without giving it all up in the review, there’s a mob of clown dudes, a city called Little Bigtop, and things are pretty bonkers from there. BUT, the book doesn’t skate on being weird for the sake of being weird. It’s fun, the stories are like episodes of the Sopranos, the fun ones, and the book would probably work without the clown thing. Which might make it sound like the clown business is unnecessary, but I see it as the clown part being a great spice that makes everything a little better.
Mellick is writing books that aren’t just bizarre, they’re good, and the bizarre is an additive rather than the main focus. He deserves a lot of credit for that.
And he deserves credit for sticking with bizarro. Clownfellas makes me think he could make a move to other genres if he wanted to. It kinda makes me suspicious, based on his crazy ability to crank ’em out, that maybe he IS writing in another genre under another name.
But he’s still in the bizarro game, and he’s making the world richer for it.
I loved my first bizarro, and it’s an exciting future where other readers will pick up their first bizarro and it’ll be this good.
If you were a young director back then, and you wanted to make a movie, a horror movie was the way to go. The locations were usually cheap (cabin in the woods, rundown farmhouse), the actors were usually first-timers (and sometimes last-timers), and because movies as dumb as Friday the 13th could make a shitload of money, studios didn’t have to get too involved, which was perfect for a director trying to show off their vision.
Maybe some of you don’t like that I called Friday the 13th stupid. But it’s pretty stupid. If you haven’t seen the original, I guess spoilers are coming. I wouldn’t normally worry about it, but I have to side with anyone who says that they started reading a review of a bizarro book filled with stories of a clown mafia, and they were surprised to find a spoiler for an old slasher. When I put it in words, it doesn’t even make sense. But here we are!
If you’re familiar, you probably know that the killer in the original Friday the 13th isn’t Jason, it’s Jason’s mom. She’s pissed off because camp counselors were “fornicating” and smoking wacky grass and doing whatever camp counselors do in these old movies. Based on the Friday the 13th movies I’ve seen (most of the first 4, plus Jason Goes to Hell like 17 times) camp counselor seemed like a good job if you wanted to spend a couple months drunk in the woods. And who doesn’t want to do that?
What’s dumb about the Jason’s mom thing is that we aren’t even aware of her as a character until the end of the movie. So it’s not like a viewer could watch and figure out who the killer was, and it’s not like a tension-builder, just wondering how one of the characters we’ve seen is getting away with all this.
Imagine a game of Clue, but at the end the murderer is Admiral Buttsecks, a character you didn’t even know was in the game until the end. Wouldn’t you feel cheated? Also, Colonel Mustard would probably be relieved that his ridiculous last name was overlooked because he was preceded in the military by someone with an even more ridiculous last name. And…is Colonel Mustard a real military colonel, or is he a Kentucky Colonel?
Googling…googling…
Okay, there’s a whole history. He’s usually a military colonel. But this search has put me on to some highlights from various versions of the game:
1996 UK: Similar to his 1949 counterpart, he is given an updated and more psychotic look. He wears a yellow tuxedo and is an expert in weapons and conspiracy.
A more psychotic look. Well, that’s really something.
1972 US: Portrayed in photograph as an elderly buffoon, wearing a tweed suit and sporting white fuzzy mutton chops and moustache. He wears a monocle for the first time and has an exaggerated uptight expression.
Hey, hey, hey. No buffoon wears a monocle. A gasbag, perhaps, a dilettante, MAYBE, but a buffoon?
2002 US: A more cubist rendition of 1996 US Mustard, Michael Mustard is a retired military man trying to pen his autobiography to supplement a dwindling income.
Ah, the 90’s and 2000’s, a time when someone could actually make a living by writing a book so we all had to pretend it was really difficult so we could keep everyone from getting in on the action.
Discover the Secrets: Col. Mustard had been completed reinvented as Jack Mustard, an ex-football player come sports pundit.
Well, that’s just dumb.
Back to Friday the 13th, having the killer be a character we haven’t seen is a total cop out.
Back to Clownfellas. Because this is, after all, a book review, not a movie review or board game review.
Oh, but first, a board game review: Clue sucks if your dad plays it with you, refuses to go easy on you because you’re a kid, and you have no fucking idea how those logic puzzles work and how the clues in the game could lead you to the killer.
Oh, and a movie review while we’re at it: I only saw Clue when I was young. All I remember is boobs. This is a boob-heavy movie with no actual nudity. Possibly one of the most salacious movies with no nudity in it that I’ve ever seen.
The Maid, obviously.
But then there’s Miss Scarlet.
Somewhere there’s a WAREHOUSE of footage where this character’s top just fell off, I guarantee it. Where is this warehouse? Heaven, as far as an adolescent Pete is concerned. Am I saying that an adolescent Pete would basically consider it heaven to watch 2-second clips of a lady topless? Forget laying around on clouds or reuniting with grandparents. “Look, it’s most of a boob!”
Clownfellas.
My first Carlton Mellick III was The Menstruating Mall. Menstruating is a hard word to spell. Like diarrhea. Why are all these words so hard to spell? It’s like every word that has to do with fluid ejection from the body, someone decided to make it hard to spell.
In the years that followed, I read lots of others like The Baby Jesus Butt Plug, Satan Burger, The Faggiest Vampire, Punk Land, Cuddly Holocaust…lots of others.
And then I read Quicksand House and Tumor Fruit in pretty short order, and I saw some growth. Haha, get it? Tumor? Growth?
Carlton Mellick III, somewhere along the line, had become a good writer. He was always interesting, always had great ideas, but he was a little like Philip K. Dick. I always liked Dick, but there were certainly moments in his books where you had to ignore some of the writing and stick with the story.
CMIII started writing better. His characters made you feel things. In Tumor Fruit, there was some tenderness. In Sausagey Santa, things were weird, and they were also truly hilarious.
Clownfellas might be his best.
The book is a series of stories tied together, all stories about the Binzo crime family. Without giving it all up in the review, there’s a mob of clown dudes, a city called Little Bigtop, and things are pretty bonkers from there. BUT, the book doesn’t skate on being weird for the sake of being weird. It’s fun, the stories are like episodes of the Sopranos, the fun ones, and the book would probably work without the clown thing. Which might make it sound like the clown business is unnecessary, but I see it as the clown part being a great spice that makes everything a little better.
Mellick is writing books that aren’t just bizarre, they’re good, and the bizarre is an additive rather than the main focus. He deserves a lot of credit for that.
And he deserves credit for sticking with bizarro. Clownfellas makes me think he could make a move to other genres if he wanted to. It kinda makes me suspicious, based on his crazy ability to crank ’em out, that maybe he IS writing in another genre under another name.
But he’s still in the bizarro game, and he’s making the world richer for it.
I loved my first bizarro, and it’s an exciting future where other readers will pick up their first bizarro and it’ll be this good.
January 21, 2016
A very funny send-up of mafia tropes, with several serious turns that spin into bizarro land ... everything you'd expect from the wonderfully strange and fantastic CMIII.
April 29, 2015
A solid 4*
Although I found this one slow to start, I eventually got into Clownfellas!
What a fun bizarro world Mellick has created-- a mafia of clowns who run amok through six closely related stories, battling rival gangs and each other. See the Sideshow, a wasteland on the outskirts of town where mutant clown reject psychos roam the streets, the Carnival where the Carnies rule both mayhem and the laughing gas trade, and Le Mystere, a rival gang of French clowns run by Daddy Longlegs and his twin unicycle assassin sons. Some of the stories are better than others but as a whole I fully enjoyed the ride. This is one of Mellick's longer books, definitely not a novella.
Thanks to Netgalley for the read!
Although I found this one slow to start, I eventually got into Clownfellas!
What a fun bizarro world Mellick has created-- a mafia of clowns who run amok through six closely related stories, battling rival gangs and each other. See the Sideshow, a wasteland on the outskirts of town where mutant clown reject psychos roam the streets, the Carnival where the Carnies rule both mayhem and the laughing gas trade, and Le Mystere, a rival gang of French clowns run by Daddy Longlegs and his twin unicycle assassin sons. Some of the stories are better than others but as a whole I fully enjoyed the ride. This is one of Mellick's longer books, definitely not a novella.
Thanks to Netgalley for the read!
August 9, 2015
The interconnecting stories are so well-told that the fact that we are reading about mob clowns and the bizarro world they live in seem absolutely normal.
My favorite clown would have to be Pinky. Nothing can keep this guy from being happy.
If you're looking for a bizarro read that's not too weird, this is the perfect buy for a first-time reader of this genre. Mainstream comes to mind.
An entertaining clown-tastic read of love, betrayal, and what it means to live the mob clown life.
*I received a copy from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review*
(This review would have been longer, but I lost the paper it was written on.)
My favorite clown would have to be Pinky. Nothing can keep this guy from being happy.
If you're looking for a bizarro read that's not too weird, this is the perfect buy for a first-time reader of this genre. Mainstream comes to mind.
An entertaining clown-tastic read of love, betrayal, and what it means to live the mob clown life.
*I received a copy from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review*
(This review would have been longer, but I lost the paper it was written on.)
February 17, 2015
https://koeur.wordpress.com/2015/02/1...
Publisher: Random House
Publishing Date: July 2015
ISBN: 9780804179355
Genre: Fantasy
Rating: 4.8/5
Publisher Description: For years, the hard-boiled capos of the Bozo family have run all of the funny business in Little Bigtop, from the clown brothels to the illegal comedy trade. But hard times have befallen the Bozos now that Le Mystère, the French clown Mafia, has started moving in and trying to take over the city.
Review: The cover should have Vinnie Blue Nose on it. This is a collection of stories showcasing the Bozo crime family, a collection of clowns genetically altered with “Happy Juice” with various offshoots and genetic varieties.
Listen very carefully (or read). You need to beg borrow or steal a copy of this novel. It is fugging fantastic. I don’t know where to start. The stories are inventive, the overall plot and concept is brilliant, the character development is superb, the movement is constant and entertaining and develops the characters wonderfully. The clown weapons are at once hilarious and deadly. I fell over laughing when all the clowns shouted in terror that “He knows how to mime!!” and subsequently makes a machine gun out of thin air.
I really liked Bingo Ballbreaker, Pogo and Captain Spotty. Even the French Clown syndicate (Le Mystere) and the sideshow story lines were great developments. This should be a movie. GET IT!
Publisher: Random House
Publishing Date: July 2015
ISBN: 9780804179355
Genre: Fantasy
Rating: 4.8/5
Publisher Description: For years, the hard-boiled capos of the Bozo family have run all of the funny business in Little Bigtop, from the clown brothels to the illegal comedy trade. But hard times have befallen the Bozos now that Le Mystère, the French clown Mafia, has started moving in and trying to take over the city.
Review: The cover should have Vinnie Blue Nose on it. This is a collection of stories showcasing the Bozo crime family, a collection of clowns genetically altered with “Happy Juice” with various offshoots and genetic varieties.
Listen very carefully (or read). You need to beg borrow or steal a copy of this novel. It is fugging fantastic. I don’t know where to start. The stories are inventive, the overall plot and concept is brilliant, the character development is superb, the movement is constant and entertaining and develops the characters wonderfully. The clown weapons are at once hilarious and deadly. I fell over laughing when all the clowns shouted in terror that “He knows how to mime!!” and subsequently makes a machine gun out of thin air.
I really liked Bingo Ballbreaker, Pogo and Captain Spotty. Even the French Clown syndicate (Le Mystere) and the sideshow story lines were great developments. This should be a movie. GET IT!
December 1, 2015
Paint Sin City with the sensibilities of Who Framed Roger Rabbit and you get ClownFellas.
I've head of Carlton Mellick III, before, wondering at titles like The Haunted Vagina and I Knocked Up Satan's Daughter: A Demonic Romantic Comedy. The impression that I got was that Mellick came up with insane ideas and played them out deadly serious. When ClownFellas came up on BookBub, I gave it a shot.
It would be cliché to say that I had no idea what I was in for. As the previous paragraph shows, I had a good intimation. It was still no preparation for what came next.
ClownFellas is a series of connected stories set in a world where genetically altered humans have become a race of clowns, and the new Prohibition makes comedy illegal. You get to meet the Bozo family and their crazy stomping grounds in the clown slums of Bigtop. Each story sets up the next in the cycle, following different characters over a close period of time. It's almost greasepaint-covered Pulp Fiction.
By crazy, I mean both "batshit insane" and played "completely straight." For example, traditional clown weapons are cheerfully berserk.
Imagine a group of lunatics in a deadpan style trying to murder each other in ways that the Joker would find too silly. I love the popcorn gun and hat weapons, but watch out for that cherry pie.
The stories do feel like classic crime noir. My favorite is "A Sad Day for a Happy Clown," where young gangster Pinky Smiles is framed and marked for death on the day he intend to propose to the Clownfather's niece. I was stunned at how much I was rooting for Pinky by halfway through. The Sin City comparison is apt, as we get our own version of Marv in "The Unwhackable Bingo Ballbreaker."
Low points? Well, some of the initial language seemed a little unpolished, with a redundant sentence here or there. Either Mellick settles into his stride, or I just didn't notice after a while. Also, the chapter about the illegal stand-up show falls a little flat, in my opinion. Still, this sideshow is well worth the price. Bravo, Mister Mellick. You've bought yourself a fan.
I've head of Carlton Mellick III, before, wondering at titles like The Haunted Vagina and I Knocked Up Satan's Daughter: A Demonic Romantic Comedy. The impression that I got was that Mellick came up with insane ideas and played them out deadly serious. When ClownFellas came up on BookBub, I gave it a shot.
It would be cliché to say that I had no idea what I was in for. As the previous paragraph shows, I had a good intimation. It was still no preparation for what came next.
ClownFellas is a series of connected stories set in a world where genetically altered humans have become a race of clowns, and the new Prohibition makes comedy illegal. You get to meet the Bozo family and their crazy stomping grounds in the clown slums of Bigtop. Each story sets up the next in the cycle, following different characters over a close period of time. It's almost greasepaint-covered Pulp Fiction.
By crazy, I mean both "batshit insane" and played "completely straight." For example, traditional clown weapons are cheerfully berserk.
Imagine a group of lunatics in a deadpan style trying to murder each other in ways that the Joker would find too silly. I love the popcorn gun and hat weapons, but watch out for that cherry pie.
The stories do feel like classic crime noir. My favorite is "A Sad Day for a Happy Clown," where young gangster Pinky Smiles is framed and marked for death on the day he intend to propose to the Clownfather's niece. I was stunned at how much I was rooting for Pinky by halfway through. The Sin City comparison is apt, as we get our own version of Marv in "The Unwhackable Bingo Ballbreaker."
Low points? Well, some of the initial language seemed a little unpolished, with a redundant sentence here or there. Either Mellick settles into his stride, or I just didn't notice after a while. Also, the chapter about the illegal stand-up show falls a little flat, in my opinion. Still, this sideshow is well worth the price. Bravo, Mister Mellick. You've bought yourself a fan.
April 14, 2015
Don’t Let Coulrophobia Keep You from Clown Fellas
by Cape Rust · Apr 14, 2015
Clown Fellas: Tales of the Bozo Family
Written by Carlton Mellick III
Genre(s): Action, Mafia, Bizzarro Fiction, Clowns….
Publisher: Hydra
Disclaimer: I am fine, there is not a clown standing behind me with a balloon gun threatening to blow my gumballs off I don’t write this review.
Description: For years, the hard-boiled capos of the Bozo family have run all of the funny business in Little Bigtop, from the clown brothels to the illegal comedy trade. But hard times have befallen the Bozos now that Le Mystère, the French clown Mafia, has started moving in and trying to take over the city. If that weren’t enough, they’ve got to deal with the cops, the Feds, the snitches, the carnies, the mysterious hit man Mr. Pogo, and the mutant clowns over in the Sideshow district. With the odds stacked against them, the Bozos must fight to survive . . . or die laughing.
This book is as strange as it sounds. Actually Clown Fellas is much more strange than it sounds and it is and it is wonderful. The cover art for this one was a big hook for me, but as soon as I started to delve into the story, I couldn’t put it down. Yes this is a book about a clown mafia, not a mafia full of clowns. The stories all are they types of stories that you would expect in a fictional novel about the mafia, but when you throw in size 36 shoes, red noses and balloon animals, everything changes.
I couldn’t really conceptualize how this would work. I mean a clown mafia… What were they going to do, bully the other people at the circus around? Mellick, not only made it happen he came in like a clown car full of Spider Monkeys who had spent all day eating cotton candy and huffing laffy gas. See in this book clowns are a separate race. Mellick doesn’t go any farther into how it happened or how a vanilla (non-clown, normal human) becomes a clown than he needs to. This is a story about the Bozo Family, not the clown race as a whole. His focus on sticking with the Bozos really paid off.
This book is a collection of stories about the Bozos. All of the stories intertwine, but have the rainbow suspenders strong enough to stand alone. In fact the very first story jumps right into things and starts a running narrative that acquaints you to the basics of a world where Clowns are a race and clown magic is real, even if it is never called clown magic. Mellick really got me interested from the get-go and minus a few bumps in the the road held on l=tightly the whole time.
What stood out to me most about all of these stories was how in-depth Mellick went to make this surreal setting fell authentic. Note I didn’t say realistic, but the details that Mellick included really showed they thought, love and attention to detail that he put into this. Mellick even went so far as to exsplain how clown churches and clown wedding work, because let’s face it, what mafia story is complete without a wedding? Mellick even went so far as to establish which clowns and carnies had control of which types of “trade” in town. The fact that the rival mafia of the Bozos was a bunch of French clowns was genius. Want to know what goes on in a clown strip club? This book tells you, want to know how to operate an underground comedy club… The Clown Fellas will show you. Even with all of this silliness, Mellick still sprinkled in enough gritty realism to maintain the authentic feel that I never thought a clown novel needed.
I mentioned “clown magic” it is alive and well in this story, but at the same time not overused. Clown cars work in this story, the same way they work at the circus. Want to stuff 20 clowns in a tiny car, no problem. Mellick’s explanation was simple, when viewed by a vanilla sitting in one of those clown cars it looks like all of the clowns “images” overlap one-another and thus you can fit tons of clowns in a clown car. This is a very simple but effective explanation of how this works. As a reader you get the idea, without needing the “science fiction” lesson. Balloon guns and swords made by Don Bozo work. Some pies that are thrown are lethal, some just sight gags. If you can mime a machine gun, that gun will fire, just remember to mine some extra ammo for it. All of these things are funny and deadly and most of all fun to read about.
This book was more than just a getting to know the Bozos there were some really interesting and compelling mob stories included. Mellick doesn’t just rely on bizarre subject matter to suck the reader in, he is an excellent author who writes bizarre fiction. As strong as this book started, I wasn’t really happy with the last story, it was OK but it just really didn’t have the impact as the other stories did and it contained several fo my least favorite characters in the book, so I know that didn’t help my impression of it.
Clown Fellas: Tales of the Bozo Family is the best clown mafia story you’ll probably ever read. Sure it might also be the only clown mafia novel out there right now, but who cares. I would actually love to see this setting made into an RPG using the FATE system, I really want to play a pie slinging wise guy! I hope that this isn’t a on ring circus, I want more and I hope Mellick is willing to provide it.
this review can also be seen at www.popcults.com
by Cape Rust · Apr 14, 2015
Clown Fellas: Tales of the Bozo Family
Written by Carlton Mellick III
Genre(s): Action, Mafia, Bizzarro Fiction, Clowns….
Publisher: Hydra
Disclaimer: I am fine, there is not a clown standing behind me with a balloon gun threatening to blow my gumballs off I don’t write this review.
Description: For years, the hard-boiled capos of the Bozo family have run all of the funny business in Little Bigtop, from the clown brothels to the illegal comedy trade. But hard times have befallen the Bozos now that Le Mystère, the French clown Mafia, has started moving in and trying to take over the city. If that weren’t enough, they’ve got to deal with the cops, the Feds, the snitches, the carnies, the mysterious hit man Mr. Pogo, and the mutant clowns over in the Sideshow district. With the odds stacked against them, the Bozos must fight to survive . . . or die laughing.
This book is as strange as it sounds. Actually Clown Fellas is much more strange than it sounds and it is and it is wonderful. The cover art for this one was a big hook for me, but as soon as I started to delve into the story, I couldn’t put it down. Yes this is a book about a clown mafia, not a mafia full of clowns. The stories all are they types of stories that you would expect in a fictional novel about the mafia, but when you throw in size 36 shoes, red noses and balloon animals, everything changes.
I couldn’t really conceptualize how this would work. I mean a clown mafia… What were they going to do, bully the other people at the circus around? Mellick, not only made it happen he came in like a clown car full of Spider Monkeys who had spent all day eating cotton candy and huffing laffy gas. See in this book clowns are a separate race. Mellick doesn’t go any farther into how it happened or how a vanilla (non-clown, normal human) becomes a clown than he needs to. This is a story about the Bozo Family, not the clown race as a whole. His focus on sticking with the Bozos really paid off.
This book is a collection of stories about the Bozos. All of the stories intertwine, but have the rainbow suspenders strong enough to stand alone. In fact the very first story jumps right into things and starts a running narrative that acquaints you to the basics of a world where Clowns are a race and clown magic is real, even if it is never called clown magic. Mellick really got me interested from the get-go and minus a few bumps in the the road held on l=tightly the whole time.
What stood out to me most about all of these stories was how in-depth Mellick went to make this surreal setting fell authentic. Note I didn’t say realistic, but the details that Mellick included really showed they thought, love and attention to detail that he put into this. Mellick even went so far as to exsplain how clown churches and clown wedding work, because let’s face it, what mafia story is complete without a wedding? Mellick even went so far as to establish which clowns and carnies had control of which types of “trade” in town. The fact that the rival mafia of the Bozos was a bunch of French clowns was genius. Want to know what goes on in a clown strip club? This book tells you, want to know how to operate an underground comedy club… The Clown Fellas will show you. Even with all of this silliness, Mellick still sprinkled in enough gritty realism to maintain the authentic feel that I never thought a clown novel needed.
I mentioned “clown magic” it is alive and well in this story, but at the same time not overused. Clown cars work in this story, the same way they work at the circus. Want to stuff 20 clowns in a tiny car, no problem. Mellick’s explanation was simple, when viewed by a vanilla sitting in one of those clown cars it looks like all of the clowns “images” overlap one-another and thus you can fit tons of clowns in a clown car. This is a very simple but effective explanation of how this works. As a reader you get the idea, without needing the “science fiction” lesson. Balloon guns and swords made by Don Bozo work. Some pies that are thrown are lethal, some just sight gags. If you can mime a machine gun, that gun will fire, just remember to mine some extra ammo for it. All of these things are funny and deadly and most of all fun to read about.
This book was more than just a getting to know the Bozos there were some really interesting and compelling mob stories included. Mellick doesn’t just rely on bizarre subject matter to suck the reader in, he is an excellent author who writes bizarre fiction. As strong as this book started, I wasn’t really happy with the last story, it was OK but it just really didn’t have the impact as the other stories did and it contained several fo my least favorite characters in the book, so I know that didn’t help my impression of it.
Clown Fellas: Tales of the Bozo Family is the best clown mafia story you’ll probably ever read. Sure it might also be the only clown mafia novel out there right now, but who cares. I would actually love to see this setting made into an RPG using the FATE system, I really want to play a pie slinging wise guy! I hope that this isn’t a on ring circus, I want more and I hope Mellick is willing to provide it.
this review can also be seen at www.popcults.com
February 8, 2024
Exactly as advertised.
One of Mellick’s longest books, and also one of his best. The world building in the one was GREAT. I found myself genuinely sorry to be leaving Little Bigtop upon finishing it, and would love to see more stories set in this universe in the future.
One of Mellick’s longest books, and also one of his best. The world building in the one was GREAT. I found myself genuinely sorry to be leaving Little Bigtop upon finishing it, and would love to see more stories set in this universe in the future.
May 20, 2015
I received an e-copy of this book from netgalley for review purposes.
Okay, when I first heard that this was coming out, I was rather apprehensive. Clowns and the Mafia are two subjects I'm not that into. Of course, I should not have felt that way. Carlton Mellick is fabulous and did an awesome job melding the two subjects together.
It's completely ridiculous, violent, funny and totally bizarro. I can see why this is the book that is being published with a more mainstream press.
The only reason, I'm not 5-starring it, is because I felt that some of the characters stories weren't exactly finished. I was kinda left in the air about what exactly happens with the circus vet and his family.
Okay, when I first heard that this was coming out, I was rather apprehensive. Clowns and the Mafia are two subjects I'm not that into. Of course, I should not have felt that way. Carlton Mellick is fabulous and did an awesome job melding the two subjects together.
It's completely ridiculous, violent, funny and totally bizarro. I can see why this is the book that is being published with a more mainstream press.
The only reason, I'm not 5-starring it, is because I felt that some of the characters stories weren't exactly finished. I was kinda left in the air about what exactly happens with the circus vet and his family.
April 17, 2015
ClownFellas was such a blast. With Mellick's work I have never been let down and he easily followed through with this title. There were scenes and characters in this book I'd love to see eventually adapted to a graphic novel.
January 27, 2016
This review originally published in Looking For a Good Book. Rated 2.25 of 5
Alright... so 'bizarro' fiction has become a "thing." I mean ... I know that there's been bizarro fiction for a long time (I think I was writing it back in the 80's), but it hasn't always had it's current classification (it was speculative fiction, with a twist back then). Now it's its own genre. And I love bizarro fiction. One of the earliest reviews on this site was for Blope , an excellent bizarro story, so I was pretty interested in this.
ClownFellas is a short story collection in which the stories loosely fit together to tell a novel-length story.
Is this bizarro world, mob-like families are circus clowns, with the leading family being the Bozos, and telling jokes is against the law. In addition of fending off the police, they have a rival circus of clown from France (La Mystere) trying to hone in on their territory. The clowns will probably kill you, but they'll likely throw a pie in your face first, or squirt seltzer down your pants before cutting your neck because, well, they're clowns!
In the first ten pages or so, I laughed and nodded approval at some of the gags, and I rolled my eyes at a few that were too obvious, and I was maddeningly frustrated at being told, SO many times, what the term for a fear of clowns is (it's coulrophobic). And then I had 400+ more pages to read.
Essentially, this is one giant joke. Substitute clowns for mobsters and see what funny things we can make of it. The answer is: not a lot. Once the novelty of this idea wears off (about ten pages for me) there's not much else here to hold the interest. As mobsters, I really don't care about these people. As clowns they are slightly more interesting, because they shouldn't act like mobsters. But they do. I think that's the basic problem here...it doesn't go far enough into the bizarre. It's as if Mellick took the Godfather and made everyone a circus performer. That's really only changing the surface of the characters ... their appearance and the kinds of slapstick they might do in public. But Mellick doesn't change the way they think, or what motivates them. Not really. And so we're left with a mob book that relies on one joke - substitute everything with clowns, jokes, and pie throwing. Ha ha, isn't that funny!
This looked really interesting (I don't request a book to review unless it looks interesting), but it really didn't follow through on what it set out to do, at least not for this reader.
Looking for a good book? The joke is on the reader because ClownFellas by Carlton Mellick III, relies on one basic gag all the way through 450 pages.
I received a digital copy of this book from the publisher, through Netgalley, in exchange for an honest review.
Alright... so 'bizarro' fiction has become a "thing." I mean ... I know that there's been bizarro fiction for a long time (I think I was writing it back in the 80's), but it hasn't always had it's current classification (it was speculative fiction, with a twist back then). Now it's its own genre. And I love bizarro fiction. One of the earliest reviews on this site was for Blope , an excellent bizarro story, so I was pretty interested in this.
ClownFellas is a short story collection in which the stories loosely fit together to tell a novel-length story.
Is this bizarro world, mob-like families are circus clowns, with the leading family being the Bozos, and telling jokes is against the law. In addition of fending off the police, they have a rival circus of clown from France (La Mystere) trying to hone in on their territory. The clowns will probably kill you, but they'll likely throw a pie in your face first, or squirt seltzer down your pants before cutting your neck because, well, they're clowns!
In the first ten pages or so, I laughed and nodded approval at some of the gags, and I rolled my eyes at a few that were too obvious, and I was maddeningly frustrated at being told, SO many times, what the term for a fear of clowns is (it's coulrophobic). And then I had 400+ more pages to read.
Essentially, this is one giant joke. Substitute clowns for mobsters and see what funny things we can make of it. The answer is: not a lot. Once the novelty of this idea wears off (about ten pages for me) there's not much else here to hold the interest. As mobsters, I really don't care about these people. As clowns they are slightly more interesting, because they shouldn't act like mobsters. But they do. I think that's the basic problem here...it doesn't go far enough into the bizarre. It's as if Mellick took the Godfather and made everyone a circus performer. That's really only changing the surface of the characters ... their appearance and the kinds of slapstick they might do in public. But Mellick doesn't change the way they think, or what motivates them. Not really. And so we're left with a mob book that relies on one joke - substitute everything with clowns, jokes, and pie throwing. Ha ha, isn't that funny!
This looked really interesting (I don't request a book to review unless it looks interesting), but it really didn't follow through on what it set out to do, at least not for this reader.
Looking for a good book? The joke is on the reader because ClownFellas by Carlton Mellick III, relies on one basic gag all the way through 450 pages.
I received a digital copy of this book from the publisher, through Netgalley, in exchange for an honest review.
August 4, 2015
Genre:Adult Fiction>Bizarro
Excerpt from the book:
"They call me Captain Spotty," the clown introduced himself, holding out his hand to shake.
"When Earl looked at him, his skin crawled. With his wild-eyed stare and permanent crazed smile exposing a row of black rotten teeth, Captain Spotty was the single most terrifying clown Earl had ever seen. His style was that of a hobo, wearing a patchwork coat made of green and orange plaid. A family of cockroaches scurried beneath his shabby clothes, crawling in and out of his collar and up his neck. Earl had to hold his breath to stop himself from screaming."
"As Spotty shook his hand, the paper-white clown skin felt cold and rubbery to the touch. Earl knew clowns weren't human, but he didn't realize just how inhuman they really were until he felt one in the flesh. He jerked his hand away as a cockroach crawled out the clown's sleeve and tickled his knuckle."
This book is a collection of six short stories set in a world where comedy is illegal. The characters and basic storyline flows from story to story. Just as in the prohibition era where the making of white lightning escalated, comedy now thrives. Clowns are real. The large red nose is not paint and makeup, instead their nose IS large and red. Imagine Pennywise, on steroids, as the godfather of an organization. You get the idea.
The banning of comedy has caused normal men (known as vanilla's), to become clowns by drinking a potion or "Happy Juice". Mostly it works, but occasionally the potion turns the would-be clowns into grotesque and misshapen beings, now shunned by both society and the clown world.
The clown capos have a hierarchy in the organization. There are clowns and those known as half-clowns. Romance is between them is forbidden, which of course makes it all the more alluring.
There is an on-going rivalry between the French mafia mime clowns and the Bozo clown family. The book will have you laughing at some of their antics and then as you read further, the antics turn into bizarre horror.
The arsenal used in their territorial fights are awesome, magical and weird. Mimes create invisible barriers that stop bullets from a machine gun. The machine gun may have been pulled out of a clown hat and the bullets can grow a bouquet of flowers out of the wound. The mimes fire bullets from invisible guns. The ammo includes laughing bullets that make you laugh yourself to death or depressing bullets that make you want to commit suicide.
The book is extremely clever and well-written, I look forward to reading more from this author.
ARC courtesy of the author and publisher via NetGalley in exchange for a fair review.
Excerpt from the book:
"They call me Captain Spotty," the clown introduced himself, holding out his hand to shake.
"When Earl looked at him, his skin crawled. With his wild-eyed stare and permanent crazed smile exposing a row of black rotten teeth, Captain Spotty was the single most terrifying clown Earl had ever seen. His style was that of a hobo, wearing a patchwork coat made of green and orange plaid. A family of cockroaches scurried beneath his shabby clothes, crawling in and out of his collar and up his neck. Earl had to hold his breath to stop himself from screaming."
"As Spotty shook his hand, the paper-white clown skin felt cold and rubbery to the touch. Earl knew clowns weren't human, but he didn't realize just how inhuman they really were until he felt one in the flesh. He jerked his hand away as a cockroach crawled out the clown's sleeve and tickled his knuckle."
This book is a collection of six short stories set in a world where comedy is illegal. The characters and basic storyline flows from story to story. Just as in the prohibition era where the making of white lightning escalated, comedy now thrives. Clowns are real. The large red nose is not paint and makeup, instead their nose IS large and red. Imagine Pennywise, on steroids, as the godfather of an organization. You get the idea.
The banning of comedy has caused normal men (known as vanilla's), to become clowns by drinking a potion or "Happy Juice". Mostly it works, but occasionally the potion turns the would-be clowns into grotesque and misshapen beings, now shunned by both society and the clown world.
The clown capos have a hierarchy in the organization. There are clowns and those known as half-clowns. Romance is between them is forbidden, which of course makes it all the more alluring.
There is an on-going rivalry between the French mafia mime clowns and the Bozo clown family. The book will have you laughing at some of their antics and then as you read further, the antics turn into bizarre horror.
The arsenal used in their territorial fights are awesome, magical and weird. Mimes create invisible barriers that stop bullets from a machine gun. The machine gun may have been pulled out of a clown hat and the bullets can grow a bouquet of flowers out of the wound. The mimes fire bullets from invisible guns. The ammo includes laughing bullets that make you laugh yourself to death or depressing bullets that make you want to commit suicide.
The book is extremely clever and well-written, I look forward to reading more from this author.
ARC courtesy of the author and publisher via NetGalley in exchange for a fair review.
June 28, 2015
I received the latest CMII novel from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
I've just finished an advanced copy of the latest CMIII novel and I have to admit I'm still not sure what to write. I've been a fan of bizarro for almost five years and I often wondered what would happen if mainstream publishers decided to finally start releasing bizarro titles. We now have the answer. Carlton's latest release is being published by the Random House imprint Hydra, and I have mixed feelings about this one. On one hand this Carlton Mellick III. The guy's an underground legend and I delved into this with the idea that it would be an instant classic. Problem is this doesn't feel like a Mellick book. This is being touted as Urban Fantasy and yeah, I guess it fits, but this is the guy who gave us surreal classics like The Haunted Vagina, and the Menstruating Mall. I was expecting the usual surreal Mellick that writes these bizarro fantasies that often mess with your head.
Clown Fellas is a new direction and a new style that some will love, and others will keep checking the cover just to make sure it's who the cover says it is. These are six novellas that center around the Bozo family who are clowns and also in the mafia. This is exactly why Mellick is a legend and while some elements of his style seem watered down the story telling is top notch, This is a writer trying to branch out and try something different, but I kept waiting for the old Mellick to emerge, but he just doesn't. If you have a fear of clowns this is certainly a book to avoid. These aren't your typical clowns and each novella shows a different side of the Bozo family.
I found that each novella was well written, and if anyone deserves mainstream success it's Mellick. Clown Fellas is an interesting take on the mafia genre. If anyone was going to create a clown mafia it would be this guy. This may be a newer style for Mellick but it's an easy read that you quickly become absorbed in. I did have mixed feelings about this one and still do but as I look at each novella I can see that Mellick's style in Clown Fellas really fits what this book is about. Is it violent? Of course but you expect that from a book like this and while I hate the idea that mainstream publishers have finally discovered bizarro fiction I wonder how safe and watered down it'll become.
While it may not be my favorite Mellick book it is an interesting 3 star read. I didn't exactly hate it but I didn't love it either. The idea is solid but in the end it just seemed to run out of steam. This will be officially released on July 14 and you can pre-order this now but so far it's a Kindle only release.
I've just finished an advanced copy of the latest CMIII novel and I have to admit I'm still not sure what to write. I've been a fan of bizarro for almost five years and I often wondered what would happen if mainstream publishers decided to finally start releasing bizarro titles. We now have the answer. Carlton's latest release is being published by the Random House imprint Hydra, and I have mixed feelings about this one. On one hand this Carlton Mellick III. The guy's an underground legend and I delved into this with the idea that it would be an instant classic. Problem is this doesn't feel like a Mellick book. This is being touted as Urban Fantasy and yeah, I guess it fits, but this is the guy who gave us surreal classics like The Haunted Vagina, and the Menstruating Mall. I was expecting the usual surreal Mellick that writes these bizarro fantasies that often mess with your head.
Clown Fellas is a new direction and a new style that some will love, and others will keep checking the cover just to make sure it's who the cover says it is. These are six novellas that center around the Bozo family who are clowns and also in the mafia. This is exactly why Mellick is a legend and while some elements of his style seem watered down the story telling is top notch, This is a writer trying to branch out and try something different, but I kept waiting for the old Mellick to emerge, but he just doesn't. If you have a fear of clowns this is certainly a book to avoid. These aren't your typical clowns and each novella shows a different side of the Bozo family.
I found that each novella was well written, and if anyone deserves mainstream success it's Mellick. Clown Fellas is an interesting take on the mafia genre. If anyone was going to create a clown mafia it would be this guy. This may be a newer style for Mellick but it's an easy read that you quickly become absorbed in. I did have mixed feelings about this one and still do but as I look at each novella I can see that Mellick's style in Clown Fellas really fits what this book is about. Is it violent? Of course but you expect that from a book like this and while I hate the idea that mainstream publishers have finally discovered bizarro fiction I wonder how safe and watered down it'll become.
While it may not be my favorite Mellick book it is an interesting 3 star read. I didn't exactly hate it but I didn't love it either. The idea is solid but in the end it just seemed to run out of steam. This will be officially released on July 14 and you can pre-order this now but so far it's a Kindle only release.
June 21, 2015
How would you feel if someone pointed a balloon gun at you--scared? Amused? Maybe you'd feel like it is just plain silly and not a real threat at all, since it is just a balloon. You would have to rethink that, once that someone fired the balloon gun at you and you actually got shot in the chest. You would probably be even more surprised if you started to see flowers spouting from your gunshot wounds. Or maybe you would start to believe it is a real problem only after you start to develop a severe depression forced on you from the chemicals laced within the bullet--a depression so strong that you end up killing yourself.
ClownFellas is utterly ridiculous in the best way. As my first foray into bizarro fiction, I was pretty blind going into this. I only knew that it was going to be a mafia-like story, but with clowns instead of Italians. It sounded absurd, truly. It definitely matched my expectations in that regard, I just wasn't expecting to get such enjoyment out of it.
ClownFellas is several short stories about different members of the Bozo family. It is about their rivalry with the human Carnies and the Le Mystere (French) mime clowns. It is about their run-ins with laughy gas, a toxic drug that turns them into homeless clowns if addicted to it. It tells about romance between clowns, outfits, and the many different weapons available to them. We even get to meet a mysterious clown who has replaced his feet with springs...
I laughed uproariously at the fight scene between a couple of Bozos and the Le Mystere guys. Pies have bombs in them that go off and destroy a whole city block. Miming creates invisible barriers that protect against bullets, and then turns around and mimes an invisible machine gun--you can't see the bullets, but you definitely feel the damage!
It's just so wacky, I have no other word for this. It was funny, and clever in the ways it brought clown stereotypes into existing bits of mafia culture. I can't help but crack up when there's names like Vinnie Blue Nose Don Bozo, and Laffypants. There is some serious genius work here. It is incredibly crafty, funny, and just totally ridiculous. I love it, it is awesome. Come read something random.
ClownFellas is utterly ridiculous in the best way. As my first foray into bizarro fiction, I was pretty blind going into this. I only knew that it was going to be a mafia-like story, but with clowns instead of Italians. It sounded absurd, truly. It definitely matched my expectations in that regard, I just wasn't expecting to get such enjoyment out of it.
ClownFellas is several short stories about different members of the Bozo family. It is about their rivalry with the human Carnies and the Le Mystere (French) mime clowns. It is about their run-ins with laughy gas, a toxic drug that turns them into homeless clowns if addicted to it. It tells about romance between clowns, outfits, and the many different weapons available to them. We even get to meet a mysterious clown who has replaced his feet with springs...
I laughed uproariously at the fight scene between a couple of Bozos and the Le Mystere guys. Pies have bombs in them that go off and destroy a whole city block. Miming creates invisible barriers that protect against bullets, and then turns around and mimes an invisible machine gun--you can't see the bullets, but you definitely feel the damage!
It's just so wacky, I have no other word for this. It was funny, and clever in the ways it brought clown stereotypes into existing bits of mafia culture. I can't help but crack up when there's names like Vinnie Blue Nose Don Bozo, and Laffypants. There is some serious genius work here. It is incredibly crafty, funny, and just totally ridiculous. I love it, it is awesome. Come read something random.
February 5, 2016
Imagine if clowns were crime bosses. Now imagine they aren't even human. This is the world Carlton Mellick III has created in Clownfellas: Tales of the Bozo Family. It's totally bizarre but oddly genius as well!
The book is set as six connected short stories:
In the first tale, "City of Clowns," we meet Earl Berryman, a zoo veterinarian hired to save Don Bozo's beloved lion. But there are two problems here. First, Earl has a serious clown phobia. Second, he's been drawn into a burgeoning gang war! Next up, Vinnie Blue Nose, the Bozo Top Capo, ends up lost in The Sideshow when his boss's son makes a mistake too big to cover up in "The Juggler Brothers." "A Sad Day for a Happy Clown" finds half clown Pinky Smiles preparing to propose to Uncle Jojo's beloved only daughter while "Funny Business" explores the comedy underground. Next up is the tale of "The Unwhackable Bingo Ballbreaker." And then there's "The Wedding," which begins with the ominous first line "There was no son of a bitch in all of Little Bigtop who deserved to be whacked more than Joey "Uncle Jojo" Bozo." And we soon learn why!
As you've probably already surmised, these are far from your average circus clowns. These guys fight dirty with laughing bullets, balloon weapons, and - in the case of Le Mystère - miming. Disrespecting them often comes in the form of not laughing at their jokes, but they have a code as well: rules they and the vanillas (humans) all must play by. Oh, and again, they're not human! Laughing gas can turn a vanilla into a clown, but beware the 10% who end up relegated to The Sideshow!
I knew I was getting into something weird with Clownfellas. What I didn't realize was that it was going to be brilliant fun! If the idea of a mafia clown family sounds intriguing to you, then you're probably going to enjoy this outing from Mellick as much as I did.
The book is set as six connected short stories:
In the first tale, "City of Clowns," we meet Earl Berryman, a zoo veterinarian hired to save Don Bozo's beloved lion. But there are two problems here. First, Earl has a serious clown phobia. Second, he's been drawn into a burgeoning gang war! Next up, Vinnie Blue Nose, the Bozo Top Capo, ends up lost in The Sideshow when his boss's son makes a mistake too big to cover up in "The Juggler Brothers." "A Sad Day for a Happy Clown" finds half clown Pinky Smiles preparing to propose to Uncle Jojo's beloved only daughter while "Funny Business" explores the comedy underground. Next up is the tale of "The Unwhackable Bingo Ballbreaker." And then there's "The Wedding," which begins with the ominous first line "There was no son of a bitch in all of Little Bigtop who deserved to be whacked more than Joey "Uncle Jojo" Bozo." And we soon learn why!
As you've probably already surmised, these are far from your average circus clowns. These guys fight dirty with laughing bullets, balloon weapons, and - in the case of Le Mystère - miming. Disrespecting them often comes in the form of not laughing at their jokes, but they have a code as well: rules they and the vanillas (humans) all must play by. Oh, and again, they're not human! Laughing gas can turn a vanilla into a clown, but beware the 10% who end up relegated to The Sideshow!
I knew I was getting into something weird with Clownfellas. What I didn't realize was that it was going to be brilliant fun! If the idea of a mafia clown family sounds intriguing to you, then you're probably going to enjoy this outing from Mellick as much as I did.
November 26, 2017
I’m not particularly a fan of clowns. I’m not particularly phobic about them, either, but it sure is the creepier ones that have a way of lingering in the memory, and even the benign ones are … let’s face it … kind of creepy. They’re natural fodder for horror and bizarro, being halfway there already.
Clownfellas is an unusual – to say the least – spin on classic Italian mob tropes, taking place in a world where humans have the choice of injecting themselves with a DNA-altering serum that turns them into another species, a clown; with rubbery, permanently pigmented skin in the style of grease paint, colorful hair, and a genetic predisposition for comedy, ridiculous behavior, and odd tastes in food and drugs (they primarily eat candy, and their recreational drugs include morphine-derived “laffy gas”, glitter (analogous to cocaine), and cigarettes that comes in flavors such as blueberry and cotton candy.
The story is separated into a series of loosely connected short stories, each centering on a different character’s struggles. The overall theme is one of a laffy gas distribution dispute between the Bozos, and Le Mystère , a family of French clowns whose style can be likened to that of harlequins. This stalemate explodes when a cousin of the Le Mystère family is killed by the erratic son of the Bozo’s mob boss in a bar fight.
This is an outstanding book, with plenty of humor, surprisingly human characters full of depth, and a satisfying narrative that had me compulsively turning the pages until the very end.
Clownfellas is an unusual – to say the least – spin on classic Italian mob tropes, taking place in a world where humans have the choice of injecting themselves with a DNA-altering serum that turns them into another species, a clown; with rubbery, permanently pigmented skin in the style of grease paint, colorful hair, and a genetic predisposition for comedy, ridiculous behavior, and odd tastes in food and drugs (they primarily eat candy, and their recreational drugs include morphine-derived “laffy gas”, glitter (analogous to cocaine), and cigarettes that comes in flavors such as blueberry and cotton candy.
The story is separated into a series of loosely connected short stories, each centering on a different character’s struggles. The overall theme is one of a laffy gas distribution dispute between the Bozos, and Le Mystère , a family of French clowns whose style can be likened to that of harlequins. This stalemate explodes when a cousin of the Le Mystère family is killed by the erratic son of the Bozo’s mob boss in a bar fight.
This is an outstanding book, with plenty of humor, surprisingly human characters full of depth, and a satisfying narrative that had me compulsively turning the pages until the very end.
January 10, 2026
Una novela sorprendente, dado que navega aguas de naturaleza bastante diferente a las habituales en el autor. Al margen del tema de que sean payasos, que no va mucho más allá de la singularidad de las armas y habilidades que puedan tener ciertos personajes, la novela es puramente de gángsters, eso sí, con mucho humor negro. No se encuentra aquí la habitual oda a la visceralidad, degradación y mutación de cuerpo y mente que tanto caracteriza a Mellick. Recuerda mucho a los Soprano por el carácter episódico, como si de una serie se tratase, y por ese tono socarrón y cómico que está siempre presente. Tanto las tramas como los personajes están extraordinariamente definidos, y las historias se hilvanan y conectan de forma acertadísima. Un libraco que se sale del bizarro y puede gustar a cualquier amante del thriller o el noir más convencionales.
October 22, 2018
Mellick’s clown opus
Of course it is bizarre, I would expect no less. It’s funny and thought-provoking, too. What pleasantly surprised me is that this work is of an epic proportion. There is real characterization and plot here. I mean this in the best possible way, but Mellick’s work is generally like a shot of cheap tequila—fun, abrasive, and entertaining for the night. This is something else. A bizarro masterpiece? I’m almost worried that if he’s showing this level of craft and maturity, he may grow out of bizarro fiction. Let’s hope not.
Of course it is bizarre, I would expect no less. It’s funny and thought-provoking, too. What pleasantly surprised me is that this work is of an epic proportion. There is real characterization and plot here. I mean this in the best possible way, but Mellick’s work is generally like a shot of cheap tequila—fun, abrasive, and entertaining for the night. This is something else. A bizarro masterpiece? I’m almost worried that if he’s showing this level of craft and maturity, he may grow out of bizarro fiction. Let’s hope not.
February 13, 2022
4.5 stars - Loved it! Had this on my Kindle for several years and finally got around to reading it when I was in dire need of some humor and levity in my life. Insanely inventive, absurdly comedic, brilliantly creative, and a helluva lot of fun. Made me laugh out loud many times, in a good way. It may not be to everyone's taste but it certainly worked for me. Recommended!
February 16, 2025
This one has been on my list for a while!!
Thrilled to have dove into this wacky world today - this book is essentially 6 novellas surrounding the Binzo family - certified clownfella gangsters.
Each story focuses on a different character in their world - but they are all loosely tied.
This contained such an original idea with extremely creative world building, it was hard to put down!
Thrilled to have dove into this wacky world today - this book is essentially 6 novellas surrounding the Binzo family - certified clownfella gangsters.
Each story focuses on a different character in their world - but they are all loosely tied.
This contained such an original idea with extremely creative world building, it was hard to put down!
June 21, 2017
Clown phobia anyone?
If you aren't afraid of clowns before reading this book, you will be by the time you finish the last page! They make running the rackets a regular circus. This book has wildly imaginative characters, plots and weaponry. Great read!
If you aren't afraid of clowns before reading this book, you will be by the time you finish the last page! They make running the rackets a regular circus. This book has wildly imaginative characters, plots and weaponry. Great read!
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