In Love With Love: The Persistence and Joy of Romantic Fiction

by Ella Risbridger

Smart, funny and passionate: An ode to a beloved genre and a brilliantly insightful piece of cultural criticism

Cowboys and aliens, dukes and dancers, power dynamics, death and domesticity, vampires and veterans, tradwives and single dads and sisters and small-town politics, private jets and princes and horses, hopes and dreams and fears, and so, so much kissing: this is a love letter to romantic fiction, but it's also a book about creativity and creation and the job of art in this crazy old world.

Why do we read? Why do we write? What makes some books last forever, and others vanish from memory? What is the point of everything, anything, when everything - especially romantic love - is so fleeting in the grand scheme of things? How do we love when the world is falling apart? And what does it mean that love is the one subject of which we never seem to tire?

Part literary criticism, part investigation, total passion project, In Love with Love is a wild tour from the very beginnings of kissing in books through historic trends, favourite tropes, beloved friends and brand-new loves, from Jane Austen to Jasmine Guillory, Jilly Cooper to Georgette Heyer, from the depths of the ocean to the furthest reaches of the outer galaxy . . .

Genres: Nonfiction, Romance, Books About Books, Audiobook

288 pages, Hardcover

First published November 6, 2025

Reviews

[mary steven · Rating 4 out of 5]

i love you romantic fiction, so so much. and it is WONDERFUL to read a book that celebrates romantic fiction the way this one does.

[Meg Holch · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a treat this book is! I loved the foray into the different romantic fiction worlds, each told with such wit and palpable curiosity.

I’ve adored Ella’s work for years, from her gorgeous cookbooks to her appearances on the Sentimental Garbage pod. This book is packed full of enthusiasm and optimism and I feel better for reading it!

[Katy Wheatley · Rating 5 out of 5]

An engaging, thoughtful overview of the romance genre, this is the perfect non fiction for me. It wears its erudition and learning lightly, it invites you in as the reader and after a while you forget you're reading because it feels a lot like you're having a chat with a trusted friend. This is humorous without being patronising and thoughtful without being ponderous or judgmental. We go from Jane Austen to tentacle porn, from the classics to ebooks and fan fiction and there is not a hint of snobbery in the way Risbridger engages with any of it. I came away with a huge reading list, which I was very happy about.

[Emma May · Rating 3 out of 5]

Loved the beginning of the book and was hooked from the beginning. However I felt like it went into more of a review of every romantic fiction book ever towards the end. Good start, disappointing finish

[Lilly Hannelore · Rating 4 out of 5]

mandatory reading for romance readers and romance reader haters! it’s an essay collection, so there are definitely one or two essays that aren’t as strong as the rest, but this is a brilliant collection examining romantic fiction, its readers and its writers. she manages to put a lot of my own thoughts and feelings onto paper, and i think most other romance readers will resonate with her thoughts too. it strengthens my own love for the genre and community.

[Pollie Frances · Rating 5 out of 5]

God I feel seen

[Helena · Rating 4 out of 5]

Funny, witty, heartfelt and a thoughtful meditation on the genre and what romantic literature says about the world we live in and the readers who read it.

To think we can live without love and therefore without literature about love is to deny a fundamental truth (some might say universally acknowledged), that we all go through this life seeking out love and seeking to explore our own desires. That for many, to read romantic fiction is to imagine a world different to the one we may find ourselves in and to be seen for who we are in amongst the pages and characters that lie within.

Romantic literature says I am here with you. I am seeking the same thing, exploring the same thoughts. I am also in love with love.

“Romantic novels tell us there is space for love in this world […]. Romantic fiction is mostly about two people but it is also always about the world in which they live and ways the world shapes and scars and marks the people within it. We are in some ways everyone we’ve ever met.”

(Lots to add to the TBR!)

[Molly Frank · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book so much! I think Risbridger repeats herself a bit at the beginning, but by the end has settled into the book fully. If you’re looking for a serious lit crit with footnotes, this is not for you. But, if you want to listen to someone who loves the romance genre so dearly and knows it inside and out talk about what romance does socially and imaginatively, please give this book a read!

[Sophie (RedheadReading) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Love coming out of a book with a long reading list!

[Will · Rating 4 out of 5]

Truly a love letter to romance novels!!
Enjoyed this as an audiobook and have left with some weird and wonderful book recommendations, and feeling very inspired towards the genre 💘💘

[Alice King · Rating 5 out of 5]

Probably a 4.5 rounded up but so funny and thoughtful and interesting

[Abby Noble · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a lovely book. I completely forgot I had pre-ordered this last year after listening to an episode of Sentimental Garbage, so when it turned up in my kindle library I thought 'oh god, I'd better not waste this'. It's been a lovely read - it felt equal parts like having a deep chat with a close friend about various romance novels we've loved, and like a fun encyclopedia of romance novels and romance novel tropes from an incredibly excited romance novel lover. The fanfiction chapter in particular made me think of the first time I had the courage to confess that I read fanfiction, and that one friend who said they did too - so exciting to be taken seriously and get to talk about that massive shared world that for some reason feels embarrassing to discuss in the open!
I have referenced this book and Ella's trope outlines in several conversations now since beginning my read. I was particularly partial to the chapter breaking down the hot billionaire trope - I feel like all the subtropes are burned into my mind now forever, a lens I can't stop seeing through! Also the time she basically just listed every pride and prejudice adaptation that exists - doing the lord's work.
Although a little later in the book I was drifting a little through some of her really enthusiastic ideas about what it is to be a writer or reader of romance, I still enjoyed it and the general positive energy, not to mention the endless fun facts of the romance novel summaries peppered throughout.
The only reason it took me so long to finish was that I had to take a break in the middle to read several actual romance novels - so thank you Ella for giving me back my romance novel reading enthusiasm!

[Jess · Rating 4 out of 5]

I would, I think, quite happily read Ella Risbridger's thoughts on any subject. I've adored her blog, her newsletter, and her cookbooks, and despite seemingly wrestling with a different topic, her style translates really well into this contemplation of romantic literature. I found myself jotting down notes about new books to add to my TBR whilst reading In Love With Love, but I also greatly enjoyed the discussion around what motivates people to read and/or write romantic fiction.. I found the discussion of gender and sexuality in relation to how romance is published and consumed to be especially insightful - and especially in the consideration of fanfiction as part of the genre.
I will continue to seek out everything Risbridger writes, and can be fairly confident of having both an enjoyable and introspective time while reading it.
Thank you to Sceptre and Netgalley for the ARC.

[Meg · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 ⭐

ARC Review

The first chapter of this book was great and if was really interesting to see how similar the tropes are from classics but after the first chapter the book lost it's spark.

A lot of the sections and paragraphs were just too long and convoluted to understand the point of them.

Thank you to Netgalley for the advanced copy of this book.

[Hannah Rials Jensen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I only like books about other books, and this one was delightful. Even though I lean more romantic fantasy than straight romance, Ella’s deep dive into romance fiction through the ages was so much fun. She’s insightful and funny and unbiased and biased in all the right places. And ending the book with Twilight 👌🏼👌🏼

[Lucy Skeet · Rating 4 out of 5]

Gorgeous!! Thanks to Sceptre for my proof

[Julia Harding · Rating 4 out of 5]

If ever there was a textbook that holds your hand and takes you through the journey from Ice Planet Barbarians via Pamela,. paying attention to Persuasion via Dracula and Bridget Jones, this is the book for you.
Sociologically how our fantasies change and how if you are any kind of man who wants to understand a woman, watch and listen to what they read and why
This is about why women read what they read, about being female and what we enjoy and why tolerance, understanding and love is
still the only story in town.

[Natasha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall I enjoyed this book looking at the different types of romantic fiction available. Interesting to see how recurring character tropes have and continue to appear throughout literary history. I was surprised not to read about some authors work in this collection. But was pleased to add a few more books to my never ending "to-read" list, from authors I hadn't heard of. Mainly I just love reading books about books! This was a nice addition that complimented my book clubs theme this month, which was the works and related works of Jane Austen.

Thank you to the author, publisher and NetGalley for the chance to read this book in an exchange for an honest review.

[K · Rating 5 out of 5]

I want Ella to read me this book while my head is in her lap and we are both drinking cups of tea and there’s a fire in the background and I’m eating biscuits and it’s snowing outside but I have cosy socks on and there are cats wandering around us. Alternatively we are at a table and she’s telling me all her thoughts about love and I am giggling and nodding my head and going “so true bestie soooo true” this book feels like this

[Georgia O'Brien · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Why not, while we can, end with joy?”

I love a book that simultaneously takes romance novels seriously while also celebrating their inherent silliness too. If you’re not a big romance fan, I’m not sure this would convert you or speaks usefully to you – but this one is for the fans, as they say, and that’s more than ok.

[Georgie Bewes · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed these essays which are a love letter to romantic fiction, in all its shapes and forms. I’m not a huge romance reader (particularly by the author’s standards) but this book definitely made me want to pick up more!

[Vaida · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed delving into introductory realms of various romantic fictions throughout time, some I’ve read and some I’ve added to my TBR. I found it difficult to follow at some parts but overall always enjoy reading words written by and for romantics. Would read again!

[Halina]

Fantastic exploration of romantic fiction! Highly recommend for anyone who's big into romance (hi Evie).
Does anyone have a list of all the books mentioned in this?

[Cynthia M. · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Silly novels by lady novelists”. I love romance 4 ever.

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Carolina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ella is the best, this book is delightful and spoke ditectly to my heart of hearts, I love it so much and I love reading about love, romance 4ever, love is real and I know it!!

[Athena of Velaris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Clever and entertaining, this book is a love letter to romances and all who consume them!

[Aleksandra · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really enjoyed some parts of this book, but I was a bit disappointed upon finishing it. It's mostly my fault because I think I expected something the author never promised to deliver. Ella Risbridger tells us at the beginning of the book that it's not intended to be a defense of romantic literature or a survey of all or even just contemporary romance novels. And it's not that. The subtitle reads "The Persistence and Joy of Romantic Fiction" and the book is about that or, more precisely, about how enduring communities were built and keep being built based on people's enjoyment of this genre of literature. In order to show this, Risbridger talks about the history of romantic fiction (by no means comprehensively), about magazines, editors and serialized romantic fiction that helped shape the genre as we know it today and she also lists so many romance novels, some just by title and author and others by telling us about their plot and characters. There is also a chapter on fanfiction and another one on queerness in romantic literature. However, all of this felt really disjointed. The only thing that connect these different topics is the author's interest in and love for all of them. It is indeed lovely to see how Ella Risbridger has so much love for the genre as a whole, but I still wish she addressed some of the valid criticism directed at it (especially nowadays) instead of repeating too many times how much she loves and appreciates romantic fiction in all its variants.

[Ellen · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think Risbridger has a really solid framework for thinking about romance as a genre, and when this is good, it's great. Do wish it had engaged a little more with (I think, valid) criticisms of the genre -- she has a slight tendency to write off criticisms as prudishness and pretension. Sometimes this veers off into just listing the titles of books (the Jane Austen chapter is the worst for this) or paragraphs made up entirely of questions.

[Lauren Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Favourite quotes and passages:

'It is, if anything, a romance itself - or, at least, a love story. maybe it's a love letter? If it's a love letter, it has a message-in-a-bottle quality: I'm flinging this out into the world hoping that it's going to wash up at exactly your feet. Writing is always like this, I have to tell you. To write anything you have to believe, somehow, that it's all going to work out ok. You have to believe that out there, somewhere, is the person who will really see you, and love you for what they see. You have to believe, basically, that the things you believe - however earnest or embarrassing or exposing - are the things that will make someone out there go 'Yes. Yes. That's it. That's how I feel too! That's me!' You are looking for the person who gets it: the person to whom you do not have to explain anything, the person who understands everything you give them.'

'If you want to take the rights of women seriously, particularly in times where it seems that the rights of women are being eroded from all sides, you must also take seriously the art that women create and consume - now as much as in the past. You must take the living woman as seriously as you take the dead woman, whose opinions have been made safe by time.'

'I think, in a funny way, the whole thing hinges on delight: the whole thing being romance novels, the whole thing being reading for pleasure, the whole thing being a sense of joy that is not tied to moral or intellectual betterment.'

'It's dangerous to let women think about making their own choices: it's dangerous to let women choose their lives based on what delights them, enchants them, makes them happy instead of anyone else. It's dangerous to let women think too much about happy endings, because then they might look twice at what you want to give them instead.'

'When you read a lot of romance, the world starts to feels romantic stories, the world starts to feel story shaped.'

'The opening of Pride and Prejudice simultaneously make sand unmakes the world for the reader: there are rules to play by, which means there must also be players to test those rules by, which means there must also be players to test those rules. We walk right into a world of reason and rationality, of sense and sensibility, of acknowledged truths, yes, but also subtler questions of social order that somehow simultaneously undermine and underpin them. It's also metatextual: this is a story in which people tell themselves stories about the ways other people tell stories. This is a story about story; a narrative about the narratives of romance, sex, money, class and the social order.'

'This is what romance novels are for: they are for exploring the gaps between who we thought we were, and who we actually are. All romance happens in this space, because that's the space of possibility - and love is above all an exercise in possibility. One function of reading romance, then, might be self-revelation. Would I want this? What do I want? And who am I?'

'I know the rules here; let me use those rules to measure other worlds, other societies, other ides. Let me use the shape of the thing I know to better understand the thing I don't. The story becomes an outline through which to see the colours of other lives; the trope becomes a yard-stick by which to measure the depth of feeling. We understand innately that life is chaos; that romance is never free of complication; that love is always in context.'

'Writing is an attempt, against the odds, to preserve a moment that should already have been lost to time. It's an attempt to make something brief and almost gone; an idea, a feeling, a split-second sensation of how things were or are or might have been.'

'That's all there is. That's all we have. We have each other, and then in the end. It's dark - of course it's dark - but our love for each other, our connections with each other, are the necessary light.'

"A community without romance," Maya Angelou told an audience, in 1998, "risks being brutish and crass, superficial and brittle, cruel and even murderous...I don't just mean romantic romance, I don't just mean erotic romance...I mean the romance that allows us to soften our voices when we see each other."

'Tell us about what we know to be true. And make the ending happy, because we know- we all know- that happy endings are only happy for a time.'

'People laugh at romance novels because we want a happy ending; people laugh at romance novels because they think that we think that a happy ending can overcome everything that comes after. No. What would be the point of in that? We want a happy ending because of everything that came before, and everything that will come after.'