What do you think?
Rate this book
Thomas Hardy: the Guarded Life
"The Guarded Life" challenges some of the long-held views of Hardy - did he spend all his early life in preparation for his career as a writer, and did his novels really come a distant second to his poetry in his heart? In his personal life, did his first wife, Emma Hardy, really trick him into marriage and was she the ambitious women her enemies have painted her as being? And what of Florence, his second wife, who has so often been caricatured in her conflicted and passionate feelings for Hardy?By examining the relationships and contexts that shaped Hardy most - the women, the friendships and mentors, the social and family pressures, the career structures and the Dorsetshire landscape - "The Guarded Life" reveals the personality and emotional life of a public figure who has despite his fame remained until now largely obscure.
522 pages, Hardcover
First published June 16, 2006
1 person is currently reading
45 people want to read
About the author
Ralph Pite
33 books2 followersRalph Pite is currently a professor in the English Department at Bristol University.
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
March 26, 2025
The book is beautifully written and thoroughly researched. Perhaps the thoroughness of it requires time and thought to make conclusions about Hardy's life and absorb the interesting religious, philosophical, and human issues that form part of him and his stories. Many people who comment about the books they read (saying for example this is dry or boring) can't write for toffee and want spoon fed stimulation. This is an intelligent read and can offer much more if you are inclined and have the scope to think further about what the author maps out in a monocosom of a talented writer's life. It must have been difficult for the author to piece together what are for Hardy difficult and inconsistent pieces to his upbringing and adult choices. We have a prism of emotions (jealousy and fear the most painful ) and constancy does not last long amongst other beings.
From a higher perspective this biography gave me much fodder for thought. I'm intrigued by many themes that arise that apply to all humans. Gender differences are a big issue within relationships and women (as in Emma Hardy, Thomas Hardy's mother, and most females), suffer second class treatment from men and in turn cause men turmoil and get their revenge. Until women and their traditional roles are regarded as equal this short shrift will continue. Kindness or caring is not the top valued virtue by men. It is secondary to the hard skills of money, recognition and success. Women are stepping stones... take care of things...not important.
Spirituality is another theme as Hardy's faith changes and subsides. If people must pursue livelihoods at the expense of imbibing the beauty and knowledge of creation it is understandable that their 'God' is eclipsed. Add success and more ego to the equation and the ephemeral spirit wanes. Some things in life are quite simple but the complexities of humans forced to develop technical brains set us apart from other self respecting animals whose intuition remains internal and within nature and not dependent on gadgets or unloving external technology.
Englishness! An embittered feudal and then colonial past of aristocracy and rank combined with damp repression says something about the character it produces. If that is your environment then you succumb or push against it and status is the theme though stereotypes are an odd human invention like a strange set of beliefs that rule people's consciousness but in reality for the individual don't always hold true. Pite singles Hardy out as emotionally unstable, conflicted,and inconsistent but for many people in life this is the norm (we humans) and given the challenge Hardy set out to achieve it is understandable. Big undertakings produce other big emotions as people grow to achieve and more loneliness in setting themselves apart though he found his tribal circle.
There are lots of patterns and nuggets in this biography that inspired me to think about life and the human reality. Parenting! You can't win. Hardy morphed and became the literary artist both because and despite of his parents controlling ways. There is no doubt early childhood and family background and previous generations trauma influence a person and parenting is often ambivalent. Hardy's parents truly wanted him to rise but possibly not outside their reach. In a psychological sense I think that is often the norm. He crossed over the boundaries of rural life and came back again but in a very different context. I wished to know more about his mother and how her family's fall from grace into poverty affected her and interesting how like Jemima, Emma has higher social standing than Hardy's father (who emotionally passively buggers off Pite indicates) or Hardy himself.
There are deep patterns to our lives and at least Hardy tries and pursues his ambition and honestly his talents. He doesn't give up but in truth he is sad and shy and vulnerable like most of us. If he had gone into the clergy I'm not sure he would have been spiritually rewarded by the institution nor the university. At least what he produced contributed to many people's minds and imaginative enjoyment. Writing for a living is a privilege but lonely and more challenging in other spheres as well. Why does it take a person so long to learn these things if ever?
In the end I can see Hardy clearly in his stories and how he combines his own experience and people within a fictional setting. However, it took a long time to get a sense of his personality in this book. He is insecure and fearful but sticks to his writing over architecture in order to develop himself. His spiritual pursuit still underpins his life but shines far below and holding out for writing is an unconscious spiritual endeavour.
He may have been dismissive of Emma and what she contributed to their marriage and his career but there is evidence he kept trying within the marriage. Sadly I think Emma's own literary development should have been supported and respected more so that she could have emerged from a supporting role though she may have been much more involved in the writing than Pite portrays which could explain the final decade of life together.
Pite continually comes back to Hardy's sexuality and accuses him of voyeuristic tendencies which now is a criminal offence and even then, not to be taken lightly. He further draws a lot of conclusions that focus on the erotic nature of Hardy's character development in his novels. He also points out a flirtatious nature in Hardy but I think Pite is making too much of sex. Hardy appears to have an literary interest in exploring relationships between women and men (against the backdrop of other things and institutions) but I find little emphasis on the erotic element in his books. There is romance, power conflicts, seduction, love, and many relationship issues he explored, but I would not accuse Hardy of being an overly erotic writer at all.
As previously said, what is very interesting about the book is the conclusions the reader can formulate at a higher level. The regional west country mores and lifestyle paint London culture as more show than substance and rural knowledge and skills perhaps different but equal or superior to those with learned university educated status. In truth, it is not just how well you speak or accent you wield, but for many English people that is the backstop to evaluating others besides education and credentials which in truth, might not indicate intelligence, knowledge, character or skill. Purity in thought and reality are different and deceptive. Perhaps the rich and aristocratic had privilege but that is no guarantee of happiness, fulfilment, and maturity.
At the end of the day I'd imagine this was a tough biography to complete and possibly depressing weeding out the unhappiness and unsettledness amongst the bushes that took years to flower and even then prone to hard pruning and work. Was it necessary to delve into his dark side? I enjoyed Hardy's books but I'm not sure I will enjoy them as much now I know more about him.
From a higher perspective this biography gave me much fodder for thought. I'm intrigued by many themes that arise that apply to all humans. Gender differences are a big issue within relationships and women (as in Emma Hardy, Thomas Hardy's mother, and most females), suffer second class treatment from men and in turn cause men turmoil and get their revenge. Until women and their traditional roles are regarded as equal this short shrift will continue. Kindness or caring is not the top valued virtue by men. It is secondary to the hard skills of money, recognition and success. Women are stepping stones... take care of things...not important.
Spirituality is another theme as Hardy's faith changes and subsides. If people must pursue livelihoods at the expense of imbibing the beauty and knowledge of creation it is understandable that their 'God' is eclipsed. Add success and more ego to the equation and the ephemeral spirit wanes. Some things in life are quite simple but the complexities of humans forced to develop technical brains set us apart from other self respecting animals whose intuition remains internal and within nature and not dependent on gadgets or unloving external technology.
Englishness! An embittered feudal and then colonial past of aristocracy and rank combined with damp repression says something about the character it produces. If that is your environment then you succumb or push against it and status is the theme though stereotypes are an odd human invention like a strange set of beliefs that rule people's consciousness but in reality for the individual don't always hold true. Pite singles Hardy out as emotionally unstable, conflicted,and inconsistent but for many people in life this is the norm (we humans) and given the challenge Hardy set out to achieve it is understandable. Big undertakings produce other big emotions as people grow to achieve and more loneliness in setting themselves apart though he found his tribal circle.
There are lots of patterns and nuggets in this biography that inspired me to think about life and the human reality. Parenting! You can't win. Hardy morphed and became the literary artist both because and despite of his parents controlling ways. There is no doubt early childhood and family background and previous generations trauma influence a person and parenting is often ambivalent. Hardy's parents truly wanted him to rise but possibly not outside their reach. In a psychological sense I think that is often the norm. He crossed over the boundaries of rural life and came back again but in a very different context. I wished to know more about his mother and how her family's fall from grace into poverty affected her and interesting how like Jemima, Emma has higher social standing than Hardy's father (who emotionally passively buggers off Pite indicates) or Hardy himself.
There are deep patterns to our lives and at least Hardy tries and pursues his ambition and honestly his talents. He doesn't give up but in truth he is sad and shy and vulnerable like most of us. If he had gone into the clergy I'm not sure he would have been spiritually rewarded by the institution nor the university. At least what he produced contributed to many people's minds and imaginative enjoyment. Writing for a living is a privilege but lonely and more challenging in other spheres as well. Why does it take a person so long to learn these things if ever?
In the end I can see Hardy clearly in his stories and how he combines his own experience and people within a fictional setting. However, it took a long time to get a sense of his personality in this book. He is insecure and fearful but sticks to his writing over architecture in order to develop himself. His spiritual pursuit still underpins his life but shines far below and holding out for writing is an unconscious spiritual endeavour.
He may have been dismissive of Emma and what she contributed to their marriage and his career but there is evidence he kept trying within the marriage. Sadly I think Emma's own literary development should have been supported and respected more so that she could have emerged from a supporting role though she may have been much more involved in the writing than Pite portrays which could explain the final decade of life together.
Pite continually comes back to Hardy's sexuality and accuses him of voyeuristic tendencies which now is a criminal offence and even then, not to be taken lightly. He further draws a lot of conclusions that focus on the erotic nature of Hardy's character development in his novels. He also points out a flirtatious nature in Hardy but I think Pite is making too much of sex. Hardy appears to have an literary interest in exploring relationships between women and men (against the backdrop of other things and institutions) but I find little emphasis on the erotic element in his books. There is romance, power conflicts, seduction, love, and many relationship issues he explored, but I would not accuse Hardy of being an overly erotic writer at all.
As previously said, what is very interesting about the book is the conclusions the reader can formulate at a higher level. The regional west country mores and lifestyle paint London culture as more show than substance and rural knowledge and skills perhaps different but equal or superior to those with learned university educated status. In truth, it is not just how well you speak or accent you wield, but for many English people that is the backstop to evaluating others besides education and credentials which in truth, might not indicate intelligence, knowledge, character or skill. Purity in thought and reality are different and deceptive. Perhaps the rich and aristocratic had privilege but that is no guarantee of happiness, fulfilment, and maturity.
At the end of the day I'd imagine this was a tough biography to complete and possibly depressing weeding out the unhappiness and unsettledness amongst the bushes that took years to flower and even then prone to hard pruning and work. Was it necessary to delve into his dark side? I enjoyed Hardy's books but I'm not sure I will enjoy them as much now I know more about him.
August 5, 2022
Best thing I can say is that Hardy would have hated it -- 475 pages on the psychiatrist's couch!
July 28, 2023
This is infinitely superior to 'The Time-Torn Man', which came out at the same time.
It pays due respect to every publication, even the lighter stuff. It seeks to understand the purpose of such works. And then it seeks to demonstrate what his novels were doing at the end.
I was really reading this to get a proper impression as to why he stopped writing novels, as I only had a simplified version. There is a scandal, and it was enough to kill off his ambition there. But to say he was really a poet writing novels just to make money is clearly bullshit. He wouldn't have taken so many risks if that were the case.
Anyway, the title tells you an important fact of his life: he lived it carefully. That's why scandal affected him so much. That's why he didn't divorce Emma. And that's why, ultimately, this story lacks, for what of a better term, 'tension'.
Emma gets a fair hearing here. She might have been a bit dotty by the end, but that was purely a reaction to being ignored so steadfastly by her husband.
It pays due respect to every publication, even the lighter stuff. It seeks to understand the purpose of such works. And then it seeks to demonstrate what his novels were doing at the end.
I was really reading this to get a proper impression as to why he stopped writing novels, as I only had a simplified version. There is a scandal, and it was enough to kill off his ambition there. But to say he was really a poet writing novels just to make money is clearly bullshit. He wouldn't have taken so many risks if that were the case.
Anyway, the title tells you an important fact of his life: he lived it carefully. That's why scandal affected him so much. That's why he didn't divorce Emma. And that's why, ultimately, this story lacks, for what of a better term, 'tension'.
Emma gets a fair hearing here. She might have been a bit dotty by the end, but that was purely a reaction to being ignored so steadfastly by her husband.
January 30, 2016
"Tess, when it finally appeared in time for Christmas 1891, became an instant bestseller: 'its exceptional popularity' transformed Hardy from a well-respected writer into a famous man. The best London hostesses wanted him to grace their parties and the book's rapid sales began to make him wealthy."
"Famously, the Bishop of Wakefield threw his copy of Jude into the fire; other people did the same and sent Hardy the ashes through the post."
"Famously, the Bishop of Wakefield threw his copy of Jude into the fire; other people did the same and sent Hardy the ashes through the post."
January 1, 2008
I enjoyed this biography while reading it, but find it has faded in my mind compared to Claire Tomalin's biography, which I also read last year.
July 9, 2012
Couldn't make it through. Just dry.
Read
August 2, 2011Read Michael Millgate's Hardy Biography Revisited instead. Pite is trying to hard to come up with something new and startling so there's a lot of speculation and the writing isn't very readable.
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews