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Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes
Not yet published
Expected 12 Jan 27A body horror novel about the toxic for-profit US medical system and a guy who shits snakes.
Adam has been shitting snakes for weeks; a secret he’s kept from his partner, Darby. They’ve been building a life together despite multiple setbacks in having children, and after Darby finds out about the snakes, she is supportive as can be—considering she’s terrified of snakes. The doctors, on the other hand, don’t buy it. They gaslight Adam, telling him he probably just needs to change his diet and exercise.
As his condition worsens, countless doctors tell him there is nothing to worry about, and Darby might be pregnant… So Adam hatches a plan to expel the snakes and prove to his doctors once and for all he is not full of shit—he’s full of snakes.
A Kafka-inspired novel for today’s irreal-era, Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes is an address to the faults of the medical system and to the sanctity of true love. A gross yet endearing novel equally full of shit as it is of heart.
Adam has been shitting snakes for weeks; a secret he’s kept from his partner, Darby. They’ve been building a life together despite multiple setbacks in having children, and after Darby finds out about the snakes, she is supportive as can be—considering she’s terrified of snakes. The doctors, on the other hand, don’t buy it. They gaslight Adam, telling him he probably just needs to change his diet and exercise.
As his condition worsens, countless doctors tell him there is nothing to worry about, and Darby might be pregnant… So Adam hatches a plan to expel the snakes and prove to his doctors once and for all he is not full of shit—he’s full of snakes.
A Kafka-inspired novel for today’s irreal-era, Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes is an address to the faults of the medical system and to the sanctity of true love. A gross yet endearing novel equally full of shit as it is of heart.
150 pages, Paperback
Expected publication January 12, 2027
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 109 reviews
August 4, 2026
"Like he’s clogging his toilet with snakes alongside me. Just two guys, side by side, shitting snakes."
I came for the title but I stayed for the weirdness. It was worth it!
If you had snakes crawling around in your intestines waiting to splash down in the toilet like a surprise, how would you react? I’m not sure what I would do but I probably would have freaked out more than the main character did with a lot more cursing and screaming.
The book delivers exactly what the title is selling. There's no sugar-coating this while also showing the world how terrible th healthcare system is. Trust me, I know all about that one. This was a lot of fun, some part hilarious, and also terrfying. Wild-ride of a book! One of my favorite books of the year!
I came for the title but I stayed for the weirdness. It was worth it!
If you had snakes crawling around in your intestines waiting to splash down in the toilet like a surprise, how would you react? I’m not sure what I would do but I probably would have freaked out more than the main character did with a lot more cursing and screaming.
The book delivers exactly what the title is selling. There's no sugar-coating this while also showing the world how terrible th healthcare system is. Trust me, I know all about that one. This was a lot of fun, some part hilarious, and also terrfying. Wild-ride of a book! One of my favorite books of the year!
Read
March 6, 2026i downloaded this one out of sheer curiosity and ended up devouring it in one sitting. it's a wildly entertaining and fast-paced novella about—you guessed it—a man who cannot stop shitting snakes, but it also tackles a number of timely topics, to varying degrees of success: what it feels like to suffer from an ailment and not be believed by doctors and specialists, how viral videos and AI factor into public belief of a situation, and the importance of weathering your storms with the people who do believe you and stand by you.
i had a lot of fun with this one, and while i definitely recommend it, i think the intended social commentary often felt buried and i was left wanting a little more impact from the story as a whole.
i had a lot of fun with this one, and while i definitely recommend it, i think the intended social commentary often felt buried and i was left wanting a little more impact from the story as a whole.
August 4, 2026
ARC review, thanks NetGalley!
The more I think about it, the less I know what to think about this book.
Of course I was excited to read it because of the title. Also it being marked as horror and humorous made me curious.
Well, the snakes were there, and he was definitely shitting them. But horror? Absolutely not. Funny? Not really, apart from him shitting snakes, which is more ridiculous than funny in my opinion.
I know shitting snakes isn’t realistic but the rest of the story wasn’t either. The reactions from people, the logic and reason were just absurd.
I wanted to give this book 3/5 stars but now that I’m writing this review I’ve decided to lower it to 2/5, because… what even happened?
The more I think about it, the less I know what to think about this book.
Of course I was excited to read it because of the title. Also it being marked as horror and humorous made me curious.
Well, the snakes were there, and he was definitely shitting them. But horror? Absolutely not. Funny? Not really, apart from him shitting snakes, which is more ridiculous than funny in my opinion.
I know shitting snakes isn’t realistic but the rest of the story wasn’t either. The reactions from people, the logic and reason were just absurd.
I wanted to give this book 3/5 stars but now that I’m writing this review I’ve decided to lower it to 2/5, because… what even happened?
March 15, 2026
I can’t lie, I love me a weird snake story.
The title of this one immediately drew me in, curious on how this whole snake debacle would play out.
I really enjoyed the commentary on how frustrating the health care system can be. Main character Adam was literally dealing with snakes coming out of his ass and the doctors were giving him the most useless solutions, like can you guys just hear him out PLEASE.
It was serious in the material but still tackled in a fun way regarding the whole snake thing keeping me hooked the entire time. This was a quick paced read and I definitely recommend this for anyone looking for social commentary with a bit of mild body horror.
This is also now the third time that I’ve read something with a snake body horror-esque situation and it definitely won’t be my last.
Thank you so much to CLASH Books for providing me with this eARC.
The title of this one immediately drew me in, curious on how this whole snake debacle would play out.
I really enjoyed the commentary on how frustrating the health care system can be. Main character Adam was literally dealing with snakes coming out of his ass and the doctors were giving him the most useless solutions, like can you guys just hear him out PLEASE.
It was serious in the material but still tackled in a fun way regarding the whole snake thing keeping me hooked the entire time. This was a quick paced read and I definitely recommend this for anyone looking for social commentary with a bit of mild body horror.
This is also now the third time that I’ve read something with a snake body horror-esque situation and it definitely won’t be my last.
Thank you so much to CLASH Books for providing me with this eARC.
August 15, 2026
I came for the brilliant name and the unreal front cover, but I stayed for the important message.
I live in a country where I don’t have to worry about covering medical costs, and this book really emphasised how lucky I am to have that.
This was a quick and enjoyable read with a very serious message delivered in the most unserious fashion.
Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for the free ARC provided in exchange for my honest review.
I live in a country where I don’t have to worry about covering medical costs, and this book really emphasised how lucky I am to have that.
This was a quick and enjoyable read with a very serious message delivered in the most unserious fashion.
Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for the free ARC provided in exchange for my honest review.
August 11, 2026
Absurd. Amazing.
August 2, 2026
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley- thank you to the publishers for the opportunity to read this!
Honestly, wow! I have truly never read anything like this before. This was an absolutely wild ride of a novella with so much to say.
As soon as I read what this was about, I knew I needed to read it. I mean, come on- who doesn’t want to read a book about a man shitting snakes? Absolute *chef’s kiss* of a premise.
I think this book has really resonated with readers because it takes something relatable that most people have experienced at some point in their lives- not feeling heard or believed by a medical provider- and really runs with it. Like this man is literally shitting snakes and they’re out here telling him to stretch and think about removing gluten from his diet. Talk about gaslighting.
This book had a lot of interesting discussion and commentary on a lot of modern topics- consumerism, medical gaslighting, complicated familial dynamics, miscarriages and complications around birth, AI and its impact on our perception of reality- just so much. For such a short story, it covered a lot and did it well. I appreciated how the main events of the story (snake shitting) really puts the main character in a position to critique a lot of aspects of modern life as he continues to be dismissed and unsupported.
Shoutout to Darby for being an absolute icon of a wife. It was so refreshing reading about unconditional love and support, and for Adam to have his wife be so unflinchingly in his corner was so heartwarming.
I also have to give the author credit for how many times I gasped at the events of this story. Incredibly compelling and well paced writing.
I loved the ending. What a finale. Standing ovation. Encore. Absolutely love love loved this novella. Cannot recommend it enough!
Honestly, wow! I have truly never read anything like this before. This was an absolutely wild ride of a novella with so much to say.
As soon as I read what this was about, I knew I needed to read it. I mean, come on- who doesn’t want to read a book about a man shitting snakes? Absolute *chef’s kiss* of a premise.
I think this book has really resonated with readers because it takes something relatable that most people have experienced at some point in their lives- not feeling heard or believed by a medical provider- and really runs with it. Like this man is literally shitting snakes and they’re out here telling him to stretch and think about removing gluten from his diet. Talk about gaslighting.
This book had a lot of interesting discussion and commentary on a lot of modern topics- consumerism, medical gaslighting, complicated familial dynamics, miscarriages and complications around birth, AI and its impact on our perception of reality- just so much. For such a short story, it covered a lot and did it well. I appreciated how the main events of the story (snake shitting) really puts the main character in a position to critique a lot of aspects of modern life as he continues to be dismissed and unsupported.
Shoutout to Darby for being an absolute icon of a wife. It was so refreshing reading about unconditional love and support, and for Adam to have his wife be so unflinchingly in his corner was so heartwarming.
I also have to give the author credit for how many times I gasped at the events of this story. Incredibly compelling and well paced writing.
I loved the ending. What a finale. Standing ovation. Encore. Absolutely love love loved this novella. Cannot recommend it enough!
September 22, 2026
4.5 ⭐️This book! The title is hilarious and it was 100% why I picked it up. It is so much more though. While it has its bizarre and hilarious moments, this focuses on the messed up health system in USA, the complications of needing medical treatment and never getting answers. How chronic illnesses aren’t detectable and so you’re having to suffer in silence.
The story is only 150 pages, so a quick read, but still really impactful. It kept me interested and curious to where things were headed the entire time. The language and writing style is abrupt which adds to the MMC personality. I liked that a lot.
My one note is I would have liked a bit more of an absurd ending. It felt a little “ok that’s it”. Maybe some wild turn of events or something less happy? Hahah my morbid reader coming out. Personal preferences I’m sure.
I really enjoyed this and 1000% recommend. It’s fun, meaningful, and pretty silly.
“I want it to be apparent that something is wrong with me. I want to scare the shit out of the phlebotomists.
I want to be taken seriously. To be believed.”
I really connected with this book because of personal life experiences. Overshare moment: my own mother passed away after having been to multiple Drs and no one believing her pain and issues. Her being obese was the root of anything according to them. The reality was, she had cancer and died very quickly after being diagnosed. She could have at least had her disease and pain validated.
Thankyou to NetGalley and Clash books for this advanced e-book.
The story is only 150 pages, so a quick read, but still really impactful. It kept me interested and curious to where things were headed the entire time. The language and writing style is abrupt which adds to the MMC personality. I liked that a lot.
My one note is I would have liked a bit more of an absurd ending. It felt a little “ok that’s it”. Maybe some wild turn of events or something less happy? Hahah my morbid reader coming out. Personal preferences I’m sure.
I really enjoyed this and 1000% recommend. It’s fun, meaningful, and pretty silly.
“I want it to be apparent that something is wrong with me. I want to scare the shit out of the phlebotomists.
I want to be taken seriously. To be believed.”
I really connected with this book because of personal life experiences. Overshare moment: my own mother passed away after having been to multiple Drs and no one believing her pain and issues. Her being obese was the root of anything according to them. The reality was, she had cancer and died very quickly after being diagnosed. She could have at least had her disease and pain validated.
Thankyou to NetGalley and Clash books for this advanced e-book.
July 31, 2026
𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐨𝐟 𝐞-𝐀𝐑𝐂 𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐍𝐞𝐭𝐆𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐲
Upon requesting this book on NetGalley & opening it to start reading, I assumed I was in for a mind-altering splatterpunk body-horror read. With the humor of the title, I am shocked that that was not what I was met with.
The medical gaslighting of this novella is the truest horror to me. Adam has a serious issue— he can’t stop shitting snakes. However, since urinalysis and bloodwork are all normal, the doctors deem him “just fine.” Especially as a woman, this book did a fantastic job of the internal insanity one feels when not respected or listened to by medical professionals.
I think Adam and Darby’s relationship was the truest form of accepting your partner in whatever state you find each other in.
A very well-done novella, and I honestly kind of wish there was a more sincere title to make the content match its exterior.
As an exotic pet-keeper myself, my favorite quote from this novella was “The snake told me what no one else ever did— that I’m good enough. And thanked me for giving them respect. Not treating them like pests.”
Thank you to NetGalley, CLASH Publishers, and Michael Bettendorf for an e-copy of “Help I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes” in exchange for an honest review.
Upon requesting this book on NetGalley & opening it to start reading, I assumed I was in for a mind-altering splatterpunk body-horror read. With the humor of the title, I am shocked that that was not what I was met with.
The medical gaslighting of this novella is the truest horror to me. Adam has a serious issue— he can’t stop shitting snakes. However, since urinalysis and bloodwork are all normal, the doctors deem him “just fine.” Especially as a woman, this book did a fantastic job of the internal insanity one feels when not respected or listened to by medical professionals.
I think Adam and Darby’s relationship was the truest form of accepting your partner in whatever state you find each other in.
A very well-done novella, and I honestly kind of wish there was a more sincere title to make the content match its exterior.
As an exotic pet-keeper myself, my favorite quote from this novella was “The snake told me what no one else ever did— that I’m good enough. And thanked me for giving them respect. Not treating them like pests.”
Thank you to NetGalley, CLASH Publishers, and Michael Bettendorf for an e-copy of “Help I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes” in exchange for an honest review.
September 4, 2026
Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes! definitely wins points for one of the wildest premises I’ve ever read. The entire time, I felt like the story was building toward some crazy explanation or punchline that would finally tell me WHY this character was literally shitting snakes.
Unfortunately, the ending fell flat for me. I kept waiting for everything to come together, but instead I finished the book asking, “Wait… what happened? Why the snakes?!”
It was weird, entertaining, and certainly memorable but I needed that ending to give me more.
Unfortunately, the ending fell flat for me. I kept waiting for everything to come together, but instead I finished the book asking, “Wait… what happened? Why the snakes?!”
It was weird, entertaining, and certainly memorable but I needed that ending to give me more.
June 7, 2026
What drove me to read this book was the insane title. It was a short and eye opening book.
You would think from the title it would be a comedy. But it was far from that.
The medical system is definitely corrupt. I have known this for years, and this book just sheds light on not being heard and taken seriously unless you take drastic measures like he did.
One quote from the book “One of the biggest failures of our culture is treating the body as something to be ashamed of. Being embarrassed by things we have zero control over. Hiding facets of our health simply because it's met with degradation upon admittance by those who are supposed to help navigate us through our ailments. Explain our symptoms. Fix our problems.”
Thank you NetGalley and to the author for trusting me with reading and reviewing this book.
You would think from the title it would be a comedy. But it was far from that.
The medical system is definitely corrupt. I have known this for years, and this book just sheds light on not being heard and taken seriously unless you take drastic measures like he did.
One quote from the book “One of the biggest failures of our culture is treating the body as something to be ashamed of. Being embarrassed by things we have zero control over. Hiding facets of our health simply because it's met with degradation upon admittance by those who are supposed to help navigate us through our ailments. Explain our symptoms. Fix our problems.”
Thank you NetGalley and to the author for trusting me with reading and reviewing this book.
Currently Reading
June 10, 2026Already sold from the title and description. Medical gaslighting depicted via weird horror about snakes? Yes please.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
When you think about it, aren’t we all shitting snakes?
Is there a more American psychological condition than having something going on with our bodies that we just don’t have the time, money, or freedom from the grind to get checked out?
Bettendorf grabs you with the absurdist title, then wallops you with a terrifyingly familiar story of capitalism forcing bodies and relationships to fall apart. I'd recommend this to both seasoned bizarro fans, and those curious about the genre. The premise is of course pretty out there (or should I say up there?) but the plot and especially dialogue are completely grounded in the absurd machine that is trying to stay alive in the US of A.
Kafka by way of Sorry For Bothering You and Ballard, this is a phenomenal quick nightmare that’s as gross as it is shockingly relevant. Corbyn says check it out!
Thanks to CLASH and NetGalley for this review copy in exchange for my honest thoughts.
Is there a more American psychological condition than having something going on with our bodies that we just don’t have the time, money, or freedom from the grind to get checked out?
Bettendorf grabs you with the absurdist title, then wallops you with a terrifyingly familiar story of capitalism forcing bodies and relationships to fall apart. I'd recommend this to both seasoned bizarro fans, and those curious about the genre. The premise is of course pretty out there (or should I say up there?) but the plot and especially dialogue are completely grounded in the absurd machine that is trying to stay alive in the US of A.
Kafka by way of Sorry For Bothering You and Ballard, this is a phenomenal quick nightmare that’s as gross as it is shockingly relevant. Corbyn says check it out!
Thanks to CLASH and NetGalley for this review copy in exchange for my honest thoughts.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
I am a sucker for a silly title, so when I saw this on NetGalley, I felt a deep need to get it. HOWEVER, it was already archived, so I was out of luck. But I thought “I’ll wish for it and cross my fingers” and guess what? Like a week later I got an email “Wishes do come true! Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes now available for you” That was at the end of July. I knew it was listed as Horror, and it’s that time of year, so I decided to be a bit festive with my reading. I will say, it’s listed as horror, humor, and mystery, but it isn’t really firmly any of them. I would say it’s more satire than anything. There is definitely some humor, and some body horror, and suspense and mystery, but it’s mostly a commentary on capitalism, the state of medicine in the United States, rampant individualism, and entitlement. It’s a quick read, it’s well written, and the main character and his wife are very likable. It does a great job of portraying a common millennial plight of trying to survive in a world that is becoming harder and harder to survive in.
The MC is experiencing medical emergencies, no one believes him, no one listens, and his main concern I would say is the cost of it all, especially if they call an ambulance for him. His boss is extremely cold and it sounds like they work at a Walmart or something, but her main concern is the company she doesn’t even own, and holds low wage employees responsible for things out of their control. He tells several medical professionals the concerning experiences he’s having, and they are largely dismissive, their responses are canned and subdued. His In-Laws are self-centered and elitist. The masses are voyeuristic and also self-centered. It’s an absurd story with a silly title that’s meant to be a critique of modern society, and I really enjoyed it.
I will say, it has a LOT of chapters, maybe too many. Not that it’s a problem, but I feel like it could cut back a bit if anyone responsible for that is so inclined. Also, it could be longer. I would have kept reading this book. I would be interested to see what happens next, where these characters are going, was the results from their experiences and actions, and what impact the events have. I don’t want to get into too much detail, but there is potential for more with this world and these snakes.
The MC is experiencing medical emergencies, no one believes him, no one listens, and his main concern I would say is the cost of it all, especially if they call an ambulance for him. His boss is extremely cold and it sounds like they work at a Walmart or something, but her main concern is the company she doesn’t even own, and holds low wage employees responsible for things out of their control. He tells several medical professionals the concerning experiences he’s having, and they are largely dismissive, their responses are canned and subdued. His In-Laws are self-centered and elitist. The masses are voyeuristic and also self-centered. It’s an absurd story with a silly title that’s meant to be a critique of modern society, and I really enjoyed it.
I will say, it has a LOT of chapters, maybe too many. Not that it’s a problem, but I feel like it could cut back a bit if anyone responsible for that is so inclined. Also, it could be longer. I would have kept reading this book. I would be interested to see what happens next, where these characters are going, was the results from their experiences and actions, and what impact the events have. I don’t want to get into too much detail, but there is potential for more with this world and these snakes.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
Finished Reading:
Help! I Can't Stop Shitting Snakes by Michael Bettendorf
__________
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
Format: e-book
Pages: 150
Genre: Horror
Publication date: January 12th 2027
__________
Synopsis:
Adam has been shitting snakes for weeks; a secret he’s kept from his partner, Darby. They’ve been building a life together despite multiple setbacks in having children, and after Darby finds out about the snakes, she is supportive as can be—considering she’s terrified of snakes. The doctors, on the other hand, don’t buy it. They gaslight Adam, telling him he probably just needs to change his diet and exercise.
As his condition worsens, countless doctors tell him there is nothing to worry about, and Darby might be pregnant… So Adam hatches a plan to expel the snakes and prove to his doctors once and for all he is not full of shit—he’s full of snakes.
__________
Thank you @netgalley for providing me with a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
I was scrolling Netgalley when this cover and title jumped out at me. My favourite animal is a snake and this is a Horror book about shitting snakes? *immediate request*
I went in completely blind into this book. This is one of those books where the title and cover sold the book for me. So I had no idea what to expect. Was the title literal? Was someone actually going to shit out snakes, or was it a metaphor for something else? Is it gonna be psychological horror? Body horror? Well, I can tell you now, it's literally about a dude, shitting snakes instead of feces 🤷♂️
This book was hilarious and I enjoyed it thoroughly. However, at its heart, it definitely sheds a light on a legit issue in today's world. The medical system and its many flaws. As our MC tries to find a solution to his peculiar issue (which causes him severe pain), doctors see him, assess him, and then sends him on his way with medication and/or other treatments to "solve his ailments". Physical therapy, psychologist, ER, and while all that is happening, insurance barely helps in the costs, and work is being an absolute pain in his ass. Which has enough to deal with already 😂
All in all, I really enjoyed it!
Help! I Can't Stop Shitting Snakes by Michael Bettendorf
__________
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5
Format: e-book
Pages: 150
Genre: Horror
Publication date: January 12th 2027
__________
Synopsis:
Adam has been shitting snakes for weeks; a secret he’s kept from his partner, Darby. They’ve been building a life together despite multiple setbacks in having children, and after Darby finds out about the snakes, she is supportive as can be—considering she’s terrified of snakes. The doctors, on the other hand, don’t buy it. They gaslight Adam, telling him he probably just needs to change his diet and exercise.
As his condition worsens, countless doctors tell him there is nothing to worry about, and Darby might be pregnant… So Adam hatches a plan to expel the snakes and prove to his doctors once and for all he is not full of shit—he’s full of snakes.
__________
Thank you @netgalley for providing me with a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
I was scrolling Netgalley when this cover and title jumped out at me. My favourite animal is a snake and this is a Horror book about shitting snakes? *immediate request*
I went in completely blind into this book. This is one of those books where the title and cover sold the book for me. So I had no idea what to expect. Was the title literal? Was someone actually going to shit out snakes, or was it a metaphor for something else? Is it gonna be psychological horror? Body horror? Well, I can tell you now, it's literally about a dude, shitting snakes instead of feces 🤷♂️
This book was hilarious and I enjoyed it thoroughly. However, at its heart, it definitely sheds a light on a legit issue in today's world. The medical system and its many flaws. As our MC tries to find a solution to his peculiar issue (which causes him severe pain), doctors see him, assess him, and then sends him on his way with medication and/or other treatments to "solve his ailments". Physical therapy, psychologist, ER, and while all that is happening, insurance barely helps in the costs, and work is being an absolute pain in his ass. Which has enough to deal with already 😂
All in all, I really enjoyed it!
August 5, 2026
"Babe, would you still love me if I couldn't stop shitting snakes.." is what I asked my husband as soon as I finished this book.
Did I like this book? YES. Did I think I was going to like it at first? Honestly, no. This was a case where I was sold on the bizarre cover and title and I had a great time with it. Cover and title aside, it has a lot of heart. It's relatable and heartwarming at times and the relationship between the main character and his partner was really sweet. Another thing I absolutely did not expect was a biting (see what I did there??) critique on the U.S. healthcare system, capitalism, and the millennial fatigue a lot of has have felt at some point in our lives. If you've ever had any major medical problems or gone to the doctor and been gaslit like I have, you will find this book to be incredibly relatable, maybe even a little bit infuriating too. But these are the types of convos we need to be having, and I think the author did it in a very interesting and unique way.
This is one of those novellas I classify as "bingeable" or "unputdownable." At only 150 pages, it's a quick read and the chapters are very short, so I could not stop reading because I wanted to know what happened. The book comes out on 1/12/2027 and once it does, I hope you give it a chance. If I had to make any sort of critique, I would say that I wish there was more explanation as to the properties of the actual snakes and the way they were affecting the people around them. I would honestly read a follow-up book just about that if the author every decided to go there lol.
I would absolutely recommend this delightful novella to anyone who wants to read a unique body horror and about the horrors of the capitalistic and for-profit hell we currently live in. As a side note, I would say this book is friendly for beginners to the body horror sub genre as I didn't find it to be overly graphic.
Thank you to NetGalley and CLASH Books for this ARC in exchange for an honest review and for also granting my wish! Super cool!
Did I like this book? YES. Did I think I was going to like it at first? Honestly, no. This was a case where I was sold on the bizarre cover and title and I had a great time with it. Cover and title aside, it has a lot of heart. It's relatable and heartwarming at times and the relationship between the main character and his partner was really sweet. Another thing I absolutely did not expect was a biting (see what I did there??) critique on the U.S. healthcare system, capitalism, and the millennial fatigue a lot of has have felt at some point in our lives. If you've ever had any major medical problems or gone to the doctor and been gaslit like I have, you will find this book to be incredibly relatable, maybe even a little bit infuriating too. But these are the types of convos we need to be having, and I think the author did it in a very interesting and unique way.
This is one of those novellas I classify as "bingeable" or "unputdownable." At only 150 pages, it's a quick read and the chapters are very short, so I could not stop reading because I wanted to know what happened. The book comes out on 1/12/2027 and once it does, I hope you give it a chance. If I had to make any sort of critique, I would say that I wish there was more explanation as to the properties of the actual snakes and the way they were affecting the people around them. I would honestly read a follow-up book just about that if the author every decided to go there lol.
I would absolutely recommend this delightful novella to anyone who wants to read a unique body horror and about the horrors of the capitalistic and for-profit hell we currently live in. As a side note, I would say this book is friendly for beginners to the body horror sub genre as I didn't find it to be overly graphic.
Thank you to NetGalley and CLASH Books for this ARC in exchange for an honest review and for also granting my wish! Super cool!
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
A surprising amount of heart for a book about a guy who can't stop shitting snakes.
Despite the somewhat silly premise, this author has a lot of good stuff to say regarding the medical and healthcare system. Tbh I'm overweight and if I have to go to the doctor about something I have to sit there and listen to the doctor tell me whatever I'm in for is because I'm too fat. Tripped on a curb and sprained my ankle? Have I tried losing weight about it? Messed up shoulder that, without warning, will radiate pain up my neck and leave me unable to move my arm for hours until I cave and take enough Tylenol to kill a horse? It's probably just too much sodium, have I tried not eating as much cheese? So when I tell you I really felt Adam's frustration about his numerous doctor's visits and through all his pain and suffering he's still not being HEARD!!
I also think the ending was brilliant, I won't ruin it for anyone but dear god was it satisfying. There was some stuff that I didn't quite understand about the snakes themselves but also, it's FINE. It's a guy who SHITS SNAKES. It doesn't have to make perfect, logical sense all the time. There was also a side plot that I would have liked to know more regarding Adam and his wife, Darby. It seems like they were also having some issues regarding pregnancy (so TW if that's something you don't want to read about, miscarriage is mentioned) and I appreciated their conversations but I did need a little more about it honestly. But the conversation they have with Darby's parents was also very satisfying to read as someone who's parents constantly pressure me for grandchildren even tho they have SO FUCKING MANY.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read an advance DRC and provide an honest review, all opinions are my own.
Despite the somewhat silly premise, this author has a lot of good stuff to say regarding the medical and healthcare system. Tbh I'm overweight and if I have to go to the doctor about something I have to sit there and listen to the doctor tell me whatever I'm in for is because I'm too fat. Tripped on a curb and sprained my ankle? Have I tried losing weight about it? Messed up shoulder that, without warning, will radiate pain up my neck and leave me unable to move my arm for hours until I cave and take enough Tylenol to kill a horse? It's probably just too much sodium, have I tried not eating as much cheese? So when I tell you I really felt Adam's frustration about his numerous doctor's visits and through all his pain and suffering he's still not being HEARD!!
I also think the ending was brilliant, I won't ruin it for anyone but dear god was it satisfying. There was some stuff that I didn't quite understand about the snakes themselves but also, it's FINE. It's a guy who SHITS SNAKES. It doesn't have to make perfect, logical sense all the time. There was also a side plot that I would have liked to know more regarding Adam and his wife, Darby. It seems like they were also having some issues regarding pregnancy (so TW if that's something you don't want to read about, miscarriage is mentioned) and I appreciated their conversations but I did need a little more about it honestly. But the conversation they have with Darby's parents was also very satisfying to read as someone who's parents constantly pressure me for grandchildren even tho they have SO FUCKING MANY.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read an advance DRC and provide an honest review, all opinions are my own.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
⭐⭐⭐⭐ | 4 Stars (But might be 5 for the right reader)
Considering this is a story about a guy who finds himself suddenly pooping live snakes, it was wildly relatable.
This is the type of book that I saw the title and just HAD to know what the heck it was about. What plot could be driven by a story about a guy who can't stop pooping snakes?
Turns out, a pretty damn relatable one.
I'll admit, I'm not the greatest when it comes to this type of story in terms of being sure that I understood every aspect, but to me this felt like a story about the shittiest (pun intended) of adulthood, particularly the flaws in our healthcare system, as well as the silver linings we have the choice to uncover or not which kept it from feeling too grim.
Adam is a low-level employee at what sounds like a superstore or similar, the kind that says "were a family" while using any excuse to take advantage of you. But what can he do? He's got a new house with his wife Darby, someone who should be creative but works an office job, they incur medical bills as a result of unhelpful visits thanks to the pivotal snake shitting. There are unhelpful (and rather toxic) in-laws, mental health issues, and low-key generational trauma issues. Then come the snakes.
I have a difficult time explaining what type of reader would enjoy this. It's not my usual type of story (outside a compulsion to read things with unusual names or premises), and I am still digesting it properly (that pun was an accident.) But it is a quick and engaging read with a lot of heart that a lot of readers will find resonates with their experience.
Thank you so much from NetGalley for the ARC! My opinions are my own, of course, and I did really enjoy stepping outside of my usual comfort zone for this one.
Considering this is a story about a guy who finds himself suddenly pooping live snakes, it was wildly relatable.
This is the type of book that I saw the title and just HAD to know what the heck it was about. What plot could be driven by a story about a guy who can't stop pooping snakes?
Turns out, a pretty damn relatable one.
I'll admit, I'm not the greatest when it comes to this type of story in terms of being sure that I understood every aspect, but to me this felt like a story about the shittiest (pun intended) of adulthood, particularly the flaws in our healthcare system, as well as the silver linings we have the choice to uncover or not which kept it from feeling too grim.
Adam is a low-level employee at what sounds like a superstore or similar, the kind that says "were a family" while using any excuse to take advantage of you. But what can he do? He's got a new house with his wife Darby, someone who should be creative but works an office job, they incur medical bills as a result of unhelpful visits thanks to the pivotal snake shitting. There are unhelpful (and rather toxic) in-laws, mental health issues, and low-key generational trauma issues. Then come the snakes.
I have a difficult time explaining what type of reader would enjoy this. It's not my usual type of story (outside a compulsion to read things with unusual names or premises), and I am still digesting it properly (that pun was an accident.) But it is a quick and engaging read with a lot of heart that a lot of readers will find resonates with their experience.
Thank you so much from NetGalley for the ARC! My opinions are my own, of course, and I did really enjoy stepping outside of my usual comfort zone for this one.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
“One of the biggest failures of our culture is treating the body as something to be ashamed of. Being embarrassed by things we have zero control over. Hiding facets of our health simply because it's met with degradation upon admittance by those who are supposed to help navigate us through our ailments. Explain our symptoms. Fix our problems.”-This book.
"I've grown to accustomed to cupping my balls out of this fear. I'd say it's awkward, but at this point I'm in no position to qualify anything"-Also this book.
3.5 stars : Thank you to Netgalley and the author for an advanced copy of this title.
The title and cover for this book is clearly doing the heavy lifting here, however I will say the tone it promises is not fulfilled within its pages. It starts off with humours bits and paces and then sheds that (pun intended) for a more poignant story
There is a bit of a bait-and-switch here, but not in an accusatory/negative sense. It's not really about snakes - the book has more to say about the true horror that is the medical establishment, especially his treatment him once symptoms don't overtly appear when engaging with said establishment. It's about what it feels like to not be heard by the people whose job is to listen, and how that disbelief compounds the original suffering.
The healthcare critique lands because it's specific and lived-in rather than abstract - WE ALL HAVE EITHER EXPERIENCED THIS OURSELVES OR HAVE A LOVED ONE WHO HAS HAD THEIR ISSUES DISMISSED BY A MEDICAL SYSTEM THAT IS UNABLE TO SAY "I DON'T KNOW", AND PREFERS TO RECOMMEND STRETCHING AND AVOIDING GLUTEN (thereby kicking the can down to the next carer to figure it out).
Extremely reminiscent of Stephen King's Elevation
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
I don't know what I was expecting from this novella, but sobbing hysterically wasn't it.
Adam has a problem. He's shitting snakes. Literally. As anyone with chronic health problems knows, what comes next is weeks of medical gaslighting.
The unwavering love and loyalty that both Darby and Adam show during this story is a blinding light at the end of a dark tunnel. The disgusting way Adam is treated at work, and by medical professionals, is the true horror that is woven throughout this book. As someone who has a few chronic health problems, the way Adam is treated by the medical community is spot on. When we go to a professional looking for answers and are told is most likely all in our heads, it's the most dehumazing feeling in the world. Thankfully I didn't have to go to the lengths Adam did, but one major surgery later and no one seemed to remember telling me it was all in my head. The author so eloquently told this story, and somehow used shitting snakes as the best allegory.
On a side note. I keep exotics. Tarantulas, snakes, frogs, geckos... There is a quote at the end of this book that completely tore my heart out, because it was everything I feel about my little scaley and crawly family members.
"The snake told me what no one else ever did-that Im good enough. And thanked me for giving them respect. Not treating them like pests."
Thank you Michael Bettendorf. This quote is everything I've always felt, but had trouble putting into words.
Id like to thank Michael Bettendorf, Netgalley, and CLASH books for this ebook in exchange for an honest review.
Adam has a problem. He's shitting snakes. Literally. As anyone with chronic health problems knows, what comes next is weeks of medical gaslighting.
The unwavering love and loyalty that both Darby and Adam show during this story is a blinding light at the end of a dark tunnel. The disgusting way Adam is treated at work, and by medical professionals, is the true horror that is woven throughout this book. As someone who has a few chronic health problems, the way Adam is treated by the medical community is spot on. When we go to a professional looking for answers and are told is most likely all in our heads, it's the most dehumazing feeling in the world. Thankfully I didn't have to go to the lengths Adam did, but one major surgery later and no one seemed to remember telling me it was all in my head. The author so eloquently told this story, and somehow used shitting snakes as the best allegory.
On a side note. I keep exotics. Tarantulas, snakes, frogs, geckos... There is a quote at the end of this book that completely tore my heart out, because it was everything I feel about my little scaley and crawly family members.
"The snake told me what no one else ever did-that Im good enough. And thanked me for giving them respect. Not treating them like pests."
Thank you Michael Bettendorf. This quote is everything I've always felt, but had trouble putting into words.
Id like to thank Michael Bettendorf, Netgalley, and CLASH books for this ebook in exchange for an honest review.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
3 STARS
Thank you to Michael Bettendorf and Netgalley for granting my wish request for this eARC, which I received for free in exchange for my honest review.
This was a pretty fun, interesting, quick read. The story is generally well-written and quite funny in parts. Adam and Darby's relationship was probably the highlight of the book and a great depiction of what a proper loving and supporting relationship looks like.
It would have been rated higher if it went a bit further with the concept. For a book with such a wacky title, I thought it would be even more surreal and crazy, but it didn't ever really get that wild. Yes, Adam is shitting snakes, but apart from that, the rest of the book and the world is incredibly normal. Probably the point, but I was disappointed that it didn't get crazier. As such, I found the ending a bit of a let down as the novella ultimately didn't seem to come to much of a conclusion - it just sort of stops.
As someone from the UK, I obviously understand the points and commentary it's making about the US healthcare system but as someone not suffering under that insanity (thank you NHS), that theme was less impactful on me than it could have been. However, I did think the theme of medical professionals not taking you seriously, fobbing you off with tests and diet changes and exercise when you know whatever you're dealing with is way beyond that and you need desperate help was super relatable and well conveyed. I was really angry for Adam in a lot of parts.
Overall, not a long read and worth it if you like a bit of surrealism, comedy and critique in a short book you can fly through easily.
Thank you to Michael Bettendorf and Netgalley for granting my wish request for this eARC, which I received for free in exchange for my honest review.
This was a pretty fun, interesting, quick read. The story is generally well-written and quite funny in parts. Adam and Darby's relationship was probably the highlight of the book and a great depiction of what a proper loving and supporting relationship looks like.
It would have been rated higher if it went a bit further with the concept. For a book with such a wacky title, I thought it would be even more surreal and crazy, but it didn't ever really get that wild. Yes, Adam is shitting snakes, but apart from that, the rest of the book and the world is incredibly normal. Probably the point, but I was disappointed that it didn't get crazier. As such, I found the ending a bit of a let down as the novella ultimately didn't seem to come to much of a conclusion - it just sort of stops.
As someone from the UK, I obviously understand the points and commentary it's making about the US healthcare system but as someone not suffering under that insanity (thank you NHS), that theme was less impactful on me than it could have been. However, I did think the theme of medical professionals not taking you seriously, fobbing you off with tests and diet changes and exercise when you know whatever you're dealing with is way beyond that and you need desperate help was super relatable and well conveyed. I was really angry for Adam in a lot of parts.
Overall, not a long read and worth it if you like a bit of surrealism, comedy and critique in a short book you can fly through easily.
August 8, 2026
I requested this book purely because of the title. I was absolutely not expecting to love it as much as I did 😂
Help! I'm Shitting Snakes was funny, weird and a little bit gross. I really enjoyed the commentary on the American healthcare system and the way it explores what happens when people aren't believed about their own health. As someone from the UK, I obviously don't have the same experience with the American healthcare system, so I don't think the commentary hit quite as hard for me personally, but I still found it really interesting and, unfortunately, there were parts that felt very relatable. Even with a healthcare system that doesn't require us to pay for treatment in the same way, people not being believed or taken seriously about their health is still a really important issue.
I also loved how easy this was to read. The chapters were short, the writing was really accessible, and at around 150 pages, it's a super quick read. There was a great balance between the ridiculousness of the premise and some genuinely thoughtful moments.
My only complaint? I never actually found out WHY he was shitting snakes?! 😂 And honestly, I'm still thinking about it.
Overall, this was such a strange little book that completely surprised me. I picked it up for the ridiculous title and ended up really enjoying the story and what it had to say.
And it's only 150 pages, so honestly... if you're curious, just read it. What have you got to lose? 😂
Thanks to the author, the publisher and Netgalley for the e-arc in exchange for my honest review.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
Thank you to NetGalley for the free ARC of this book. All opinions stated below are my own.
3.5/5 stars. I was, predictably, drawn in by the title of this book. I love a satire!
Help! I Can't Stop Shitting Snakes follows a man named Adam, who (predictably), can't stop shitting snakes. The problem is, no one seems to believe him. Doctors keep palming him off to another specialist, but the snakes are getting worse.
On its surface, it's a funny little satire about the state of the US medical system. Getting further into it though, this book is a cry for help. Adam can't afford an ambulance during a serious medical emergency, he keeps getting sent to specialist after specialist, he is eventually let go from his job and struggles to find another, he has to keep documenting all of his health issues to eventually be able to claim disability benefits, his wife is facing pressure from her parents to have a grandchild (despite the fact she has already miscarried)... it's not even a glass-half-empty look at life, it's a realistic one.
If you're feeling doom and gloom about today's society, and don't want something to make you feel necessarily better - you want something that finally says out loud: "EVERYTHING IS SO FUCKED", without preaching at you to vote or protest (which, you should, but you don't always need to hear it) this book will have you covered. I really appreciate a book that says something through a ridiculous premise. I found catharsis in a book about a guy who shits snakes.
3.5/5 stars. I was, predictably, drawn in by the title of this book. I love a satire!
Help! I Can't Stop Shitting Snakes follows a man named Adam, who (predictably), can't stop shitting snakes. The problem is, no one seems to believe him. Doctors keep palming him off to another specialist, but the snakes are getting worse.
On its surface, it's a funny little satire about the state of the US medical system. Getting further into it though, this book is a cry for help. Adam can't afford an ambulance during a serious medical emergency, he keeps getting sent to specialist after specialist, he is eventually let go from his job and struggles to find another, he has to keep documenting all of his health issues to eventually be able to claim disability benefits, his wife is facing pressure from her parents to have a grandchild (despite the fact she has already miscarried)... it's not even a glass-half-empty look at life, it's a realistic one.
If you're feeling doom and gloom about today's society, and don't want something to make you feel necessarily better - you want something that finally says out loud: "EVERYTHING IS SO FUCKED", without preaching at you to vote or protest (which, you should, but you don't always need to hear it) this book will have you covered. I really appreciate a book that says something through a ridiculous premise. I found catharsis in a book about a guy who shits snakes.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Alex keeps shitting snakes, and that is not a metaphor. The good news is they're not venomous, but the bad news is that all the medical professionals he sees and his boss don't take his pain, discomfort, confusion, anxiety, and THE FACT THAT SNAKES ARE LEAVING HIS BUTTHOLE seriously.
Probably like anyone else who's read this book, I was initially drawn to the cover and the title in equal measure. I expected it to be funny - and there were moments of levity - but for the most part, what I felt was empathy, relief, compassion, and my own anxiety. I connected with this book in a way I wasn't expecting, and I really felt seen. As a woman (strike one) who has chronic (strike two) GI pain (strike three), every moment of this novella felt like Bettendorf pulled my experiences from my own head. The way every medical professional talked to him; the way his debilitating pain impeded his daily life and job; the way he felt like his misery and pain were just "who I am now." If you're unburdened by medical trauma, you'll likely think this is a silly lil light-hearted body horror. If you know what it's like to be miserable and alone with it, this book will hit differently.
I really loved this book, and I'm pleasantly surprised by that. It got me with the title and kept me with the relatable commentary on the state of our healthcare system. Bravo, Mr. Bettendorf.
*Thanks to NetGalley, CLASH Books, and Michael Bettendorf for this eARC. This review contains my honest, authentic thoughts and opinions.*
Probably like anyone else who's read this book, I was initially drawn to the cover and the title in equal measure. I expected it to be funny - and there were moments of levity - but for the most part, what I felt was empathy, relief, compassion, and my own anxiety. I connected with this book in a way I wasn't expecting, and I really felt seen. As a woman (strike one) who has chronic (strike two) GI pain (strike three), every moment of this novella felt like Bettendorf pulled my experiences from my own head. The way every medical professional talked to him; the way his debilitating pain impeded his daily life and job; the way he felt like his misery and pain were just "who I am now." If you're unburdened by medical trauma, you'll likely think this is a silly lil light-hearted body horror. If you know what it's like to be miserable and alone with it, this book will hit differently.
I really loved this book, and I'm pleasantly surprised by that. It got me with the title and kept me with the relatable commentary on the state of our healthcare system. Bravo, Mr. Bettendorf.
*Thanks to NetGalley, CLASH Books, and Michael Bettendorf for this eARC. This review contains my honest, authentic thoughts and opinions.*
September 13, 2026
While I understand why this book is marketed as a comedy horror, I feel like calling it a comedy is almost doing the book a disservice. There is a lot of heart in this little book. Some parts of my review are very mildly spoiler-y but I'm putting this in a spoiler just in case.
I would have loved for this to be longer but I was also happy with where it ended. I saw another review that said there's not really a lesson to the book but I don't think every book has to have a lesson. This book is about dealing with some really horrific shit (heh) and about two people who don't have to go through it alone. I think that's beautiful.
I also think it's very funny just how different this book would have been if it were written by a woman, especially a woman of color. Not a note on the author at all, I really did love this book, but a note about how fucked the American healthcare system is.
I would have loved for this to be longer but I was also happy with where it ended. I saw another review that said there's not really a lesson to the book but I don't think every book has to have a lesson. This book is about dealing with some really horrific shit (heh) and about two people who don't have to go through it alone. I think that's beautiful.
I also think it's very funny just how different this book would have been if it were written by a woman, especially a woman of color. Not a note on the author at all, I really did love this book, but a note about how fucked the American healthcare system is.
August 4, 2026
⭐️⭐️
Ik heb oprecht geen idee wat ik zojuist heb gelezen.
Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes klonk alsof het een bizarre, grappige horror zou worden. En bizar was het zeker… maar verder weet ik niet zo goed wat ik hiervan moest maken.
Er waren zóveel momenten waarop ik alleen maar dacht: hoe dan? Hoe is het in hemelsnaam de schuld van de hoofdpersoon dat zijn schoonouders uit elkaar gaan? Waarom is zijn vrouw zó ontzettend oké met alles en gelooft ze hem direct wanneer hij haar misschien wel het vaagste verhaal vertelt dat je ooit van je partner zou kunnen horen? En WAAROM zou je op de vlonder van je arts gaan schijten omdat hij je niet gelooft??
Ik bleef maar wachten tot het horroraspect zou komen, maar voor mij kwam dat eigenlijk nooit. De humor zag ik er persoonlijk ook niet echt in en als mysterie werkte het voor mij evenmin. Aan het einde van het verhaal had ik namelijk alleen maar méér vragen dan toen ik begon. Natuurlijk verwacht ik geen volledig logische verklaring van een boek over een man die slangen schijt, maar een béétje antwoorden had ik toch wel fijn gevonden.
Misschien is die complete absurditeit juist het hele punt en werkt dit boek daardoor perfect voor de juiste lezer, maar ik bleef vooral enorm verward achter.
Twee sterren, want het was in ieder geval… een ervaring. 🐍
Met dank aan NetGalley voor het beschikbaar stellen van dit boek in ruil voor mijn eerlijke review.
Ik heb oprecht geen idee wat ik zojuist heb gelezen.
Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes klonk alsof het een bizarre, grappige horror zou worden. En bizar was het zeker… maar verder weet ik niet zo goed wat ik hiervan moest maken.
Er waren zóveel momenten waarop ik alleen maar dacht: hoe dan? Hoe is het in hemelsnaam de schuld van de hoofdpersoon dat zijn schoonouders uit elkaar gaan? Waarom is zijn vrouw zó ontzettend oké met alles en gelooft ze hem direct wanneer hij haar misschien wel het vaagste verhaal vertelt dat je ooit van je partner zou kunnen horen? En WAAROM zou je op de vlonder van je arts gaan schijten omdat hij je niet gelooft??
Ik bleef maar wachten tot het horroraspect zou komen, maar voor mij kwam dat eigenlijk nooit. De humor zag ik er persoonlijk ook niet echt in en als mysterie werkte het voor mij evenmin. Aan het einde van het verhaal had ik namelijk alleen maar méér vragen dan toen ik begon. Natuurlijk verwacht ik geen volledig logische verklaring van een boek over een man die slangen schijt, maar een béétje antwoorden had ik toch wel fijn gevonden.
Misschien is die complete absurditeit juist het hele punt en werkt dit boek daardoor perfect voor de juiste lezer, maar ik bleef vooral enorm verward achter.
Twee sterren, want het was in ieder geval… een ervaring. 🐍
Met dank aan NetGalley voor het beschikbaar stellen van dit boek in ruil voor mijn eerlijke review.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Review of advance copy received from Author
First of all, I love this title. I also love how well this book balances taking us on a funny, gross, and fun-as-hell ride while also inspiring big, relatable feelings about the American healthcare system, toxic bosses, and equally-toxic family members.
As Adam and Darby weathered this storm together, I loved how the mystery played out with the weirdness of the snakes and the snake wrangler, Rodney Diamondback's behavior (absolutely killer character name), and how Adam tries to advocate for himself on the medical side of things, but is led down a stranger path as the intrigue grows.
The unhelpful advice given by medical personnel feels very real, and relatable. I love how the mystery shakes out and explains the strange behaviors exhibited by some of the characters. One of the biggest things I love about this book is how so many of the elements are grounded in reality but also are all touched by the stranger elements of the story. Additionally, the body Horror is *on point*. This is one of those books where you can feel the character's suffering. Bettendorf is an author who really puts his characters through the paces. He's skilled at writing harrowing scenes, and doesn't spare the grisly details.
As others have said before me and will continue to, I'm sure, Adam and Darby 4 life. At the heart of this story is their support for each other and the realistic quirks that make them feel like real people.
As Adam and Darby weathered this storm together, I loved how the mystery played out with the weirdness of the snakes and the snake wrangler, Rodney Diamondback's behavior (absolutely killer character name), and how Adam tries to advocate for himself on the medical side of things, but is led down a stranger path as the intrigue grows.
The unhelpful advice given by medical personnel feels very real, and relatable. I love how the mystery shakes out and explains the strange behaviors exhibited by some of the characters. One of the biggest things I love about this book is how so many of the elements are grounded in reality but also are all touched by the stranger elements of the story. Additionally, the body Horror is *on point*. This is one of those books where you can feel the character's suffering. Bettendorf is an author who really puts his characters through the paces. He's skilled at writing harrowing scenes, and doesn't spare the grisly details.
As others have said before me and will continue to, I'm sure, Adam and Darby 4 life. At the heart of this story is their support for each other and the realistic quirks that make them feel like real people.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
I did not expect so many profound insights into the state of the United States "healthcare" system from a book about shitting snakes, but here we are. If nothing else, it earns its horror status by the repeated mentions of EOB* notices in the mail.
As someone with chronic migraine, I enjoyed the exploration on what it means to have an understudied chronic health condition—and the chance to shake my head and laugh instead of cry at the horrible absurdity of it all. The way the author touched on the fact that watching someone with an unusual, (mostly) invisible illness can stir up uncomfortable self-awareness was particularly good.
For such a wild ride, it stuck the landing pretty well. And I loved the relationship between the main character Adam and his wife Darby.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this copy for review!
*For those from more civilized countries: An EOB, or explanation of benefits, is a terrifying document Americans receive from their insurance companies (if they have one) with a bunch of horrifying numbers, usually in the hundreds and/or thousands, showing everything they didn't cover because they didn't pre-approve you getting sick. Sometimes it includes the actual dollar amount owed; sometimes it just shows five-figure hospital prices as an ominous foreshadowing of your upcoming actual bill. It's enough to make you shit a snake.
As someone with chronic migraine, I enjoyed the exploration on what it means to have an understudied chronic health condition—and the chance to shake my head and laugh instead of cry at the horrible absurdity of it all. The way the author touched on the fact that watching someone with an unusual, (mostly) invisible illness can stir up uncomfortable self-awareness was particularly good.
For such a wild ride, it stuck the landing pretty well. And I loved the relationship between the main character Adam and his wife Darby.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this copy for review!
*For those from more civilized countries: An EOB, or explanation of benefits, is a terrifying document Americans receive from their insurance companies (if they have one) with a bunch of horrifying numbers, usually in the hundreds and/or thousands, showing everything they didn't cover because they didn't pre-approve you getting sick. Sometimes it includes the actual dollar amount owed; sometimes it just shows five-figure hospital prices as an ominous foreshadowing of your upcoming actual bill. It's enough to make you shit a snake.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
With a title like Help! I Can’t Stop Shitting Snakes, I couldn’t help but be intrigued, so I was super excited when my wish was granted, and I got the chance to read this.
This was a fast-paced horror story, and yes, it starts with the main character, Adam, literally defecating snakes. As bizarre as that sounds, I thought the story offered an interesting look at our country as a whole, particularly our broken healthcare system.
Adam’s interactions with various healthcare providers were wild to me. Despite the obvious severity of what he was experiencing, no one seemed to take him seriously. Instead, he was prescribed things like dietary changes and physical therapy, while seemingly no one bothered to order the tests that might actually explain what was happening. Then there’s the concern over his copay at checkout and his fear of riding in an ambulance because of the cost. It’s both absurd and, unfortunately, completely believable.
The story also touches on how employers can treat employees dealing with serious health crises, which added another interesting layer to the overall story.
Overall, this was a fast, amusing, and surprisingly thought-provoking read. It had a great subplot, if you will, and wrapped things up on a high note. Well done, Michael Bettendorf!
This was a fast-paced horror story, and yes, it starts with the main character, Adam, literally defecating snakes. As bizarre as that sounds, I thought the story offered an interesting look at our country as a whole, particularly our broken healthcare system.
Adam’s interactions with various healthcare providers were wild to me. Despite the obvious severity of what he was experiencing, no one seemed to take him seriously. Instead, he was prescribed things like dietary changes and physical therapy, while seemingly no one bothered to order the tests that might actually explain what was happening. Then there’s the concern over his copay at checkout and his fear of riding in an ambulance because of the cost. It’s both absurd and, unfortunately, completely believable.
The story also touches on how employers can treat employees dealing with serious health crises, which added another interesting layer to the overall story.
Overall, this was a fast, amusing, and surprisingly thought-provoking read. It had a great subplot, if you will, and wrapped things up on a high note. Well done, Michael Bettendorf!
August 18, 2026
Our man Adam has a bad case of IBS (irritable bowel snakes) that he can’t seem to get help for. I was initially drawn to the goofy ass title of the book expecting it to be a romp but it was actually a lot more serious than I expected. Having experienced a mystery illness, lack of medical comfort and gaslighting, I really related to this story in a very unexpected way. I appreciated how the author used an exaggerated situation that forces our MC to go through drastic measure to prove something is actually wrong to demonstrate a well to common theme in our current healthcare system. I also felt the growing anxiety Adam feels and blame he takes on for the illness causing outside consequences. Often people with chronic or mystery illnesses feel this way. I also appreciated how finances came into play. I think the snakes were the least horrific thing in this book...
Fans of Snakes on a plane and Anaconda should read this book but seriously those who have gone experienced any healthcare trauma should as well as it was really relatable..well you know except for the shitting of snakes.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the E-ARC copy of this book. All thoughts and feedback are my own opinions 🐍
Fans of Snakes on a plane and Anaconda should read this book but seriously those who have gone experienced any healthcare trauma should as well as it was really relatable..well you know except for the shitting of snakes.
Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the E-ARC copy of this book. All thoughts and feedback are my own opinions 🐍
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