Kira Higgs had a promising career, a welcoming home, carefully tended relationships; by all conventional measures she had mastered the art of life.
But when she notices cracks in the foundation, she embarks on a very different one that dismantles what she thought she knew, and reveals something deeper in the process.
A Memoir of Sacred Longings in Secular Life is about how spiritual growth rarely presents itself in the form we expect.
A driven and curious child, a young Higgs received unfulfilling answers to what seemed a simple how can we truly know there’s such a thing as a god, beyond taking it on faith? So began a lifelong pursuit to understand the true nature of things — both visible and unseen. Even when she set certain questions aside, life-altering events fueled her curiosity.
Secularity soon met spirituality.
Through meditation practices that quietly opened inner doorways, encounters that stretched the boundaries of perception, and the patient surrender of identities she once clung to, Higgs discovers how the simplest truths can be the most profound, and how our perceptions of reality change when we remove the blinders of convention.
This is a memoir about long-term inner work, and the slow integration of a spiritual life within a demanding professional one. It’s a book of experiences, not moments that shifted perceptions, broke patterns, and revealed deeper layers of reality. It reveals how inner change actually not through a single watershed moment or dramatic revelation, but through small, cumulative pivots.
It explores meditation not as a prescription but as a laboratory. Some encounters open the door to deeper awareness; others dismantle parts of the identity that no longer work. There’s no doctrine, no dogma, just an exploration of seeing clearly, letting go of unhelpful structures, and navigating life with more attention and less resistance.
It’s about integrating the inner and outer life, the contemplative and the worldly, the self that strives and the self that listens; a divide that many, including Higgs, have struggled with. But through her lived example, she shares how these two halves can combine to create a life shaped by the leading of the spirit.
With gentle humor and hard-won wisdom, Winnowing invites readers to reconsider that which feels like loss as a key that unlocks transformation.
I write about events and ideas that altered my perspective and brought me into closer alignment with the values I hold most dear. Curiosity about human consciousness and the divine — as expressed in every facet of life — continues to draw me forward.
My first book, Winnowing: A Memoir of Spiritual Longing in Secular Life, emerged after many years working in business, and after discovering a meditation technique designed for active minds.
Before writing memoir, I spent decades as a strategist and structural consultant working with leaders navigating challenge and change. That work — and the people I met along the way — shaped how I think about clarity, candor, and the intrinsic reward of seeing reality exactly as it is.
I live in California. When I’m not meditating, writing, or consulting, I’m often on a bike or traveling through beautiful countryside. As a reader, I’m drawn to memoir, biography, crime thrillers, and western esotericism.
Winnowing by Kira Higgs is one of those rare books that you begin reading and put down — not because you want to stop, but because you need to think. From the first words, you are right inside Kira's life, and it is fascinating, and it holds you throughout.
This is a book about the big questions. Is there a God? How do you know it? And then, more personally: What do you want? Who are you — really?
Higgs doesn't hand you answers. She does something better. She shows you her own searching — with honesty, courage, and love — and in doing so, she holds up a mirror. You find yourself reflecting on your own life, seeing yourself, remembering who you were and who you are now. That is one of the great gifts of Winnowing.
The title says it all. Winnowing is about what you shed to become more fully yourself — not through a single dramatic moment, but through small, quiet pivots over time.
Her meditation practice runs through the book not as prescription but as laboratory. She is not telling you what to do. She is showing you what inner work actually looks like, lived out over years.
Higgs writes not as a guru but as an ordinary person on a path, making her way. Deep and direct, with real heart. Logic and emotion together. Warmth and toughness in the same sentence. That humility and honesty is what makes her trustworthy.
What moved me most: searching for your identity is not selfish but essential. It is the work. And even when you find yourself, you are allowed to keep fine-tuning. That is not weakness — that is wisdom.
There is real magic here. Read it. And then... give it to others.
I was drawn to Kira Higgs's book, Winnowing, because her journey was so real, so visceral. As someone with a personal meditation practice, I was interested in what brought her to the cushion and how that informed her life thereafter. I was deeply affected by the vulnerability that Higgs shared, her willingness to pull the curtain away from some difficult moments in her career and her relationships. The specifics that she writes about bring her journey into clear focus, so that the reader can more fully understand the power of her meditation practice. Higgs doesn't present her memoir as a "how to" but rather a "why to" and thus appeals to the curious seeker without pretense. I was touched by so many of her anecdotes, but one in particular stood out: dealing with her father, with whom she had been a bit more than slightly estranged, in his dying days. As the image of winnowing implies, there was a releasing, a letting go of the constraints that had impacted their relationship, and Higgs was able to be more present and bring curiosity rather than judgment to this moment. This example is just one of many powerful turns in the Higgs's path.
An honest, beautiful, and inspiring meditation on spiritual seeking and finding. Through a montage of life moments, realisations, and breaks in the structures and strictures of daily life and mental identity, the author’s words manage to communicate what is usually beyond words—a sense of awe, mystery, and the numinous. I found myself totally engrossed, re-examining my own life experiences as the author journeyed through hers.
What makes a good autobiographical read for me, is a book where ones 'a-ha' moments - the moments which catalyze and open us up to a broader world view and sense of who we Are and how it all 'works', are shared in aa way the reader can follow the path the author is sharing with us. I had fun with WInnowing as it offers some bread crumbs - some more obvious than others - for the reader to follow this path.
This is helpful as there may well be transfer value to us in helping is to navigate our own path. Often we'll find ourselves - even unconsciously - in a 'holding pattern' and so reading how someone else has navigated their way can help us open to a shift in perspective which, when we are suddenly looking from a different place, will help us to see the same thing [our life] differently - suddenly finding more inspiration, more joy, more enthusiasm, more of whatever may have been waining or appeared to have been diminished or even lacking.
May this help you let go and allow, so that you may receive and have!
Celebrating the release of Kira Higgs’ debut memoir, Winnowing, a beautiful reflection on spiritual longing in modern life.
Kira's dedicated meditation practice has informed her understanding of perception, transformation, and the subtle ways a life rearranges itself from within. Kira writes from lived experience rather than instruction, a contemplative sensibility, and a commitment to the truths that emerge when one searches inside and pays attention. Her work with teachers, students, and fellow practitioners across traditions has deepened her appreciation for both the mystery and the practicality of spiritual development. It was a joy to follow her progress on her very meaningful journey.
I received an advance reader copy and also purchased a paperback copy upon release. My opinions are my own.
I confess that I'm not the sort of person who normally reads a spiritual memoir like this, but I kept returning to it. The author seeks a spiritual life while living in a largely secular world. She begins to find it, but doesn't shy away from her own faults and struggles. It made me feel like I could honestly question my life and choices too, but in a nonjudgmental way. I also recommended the book to a friend, who is trying to find her way right now.
I like the clear eyed writing style of this writer. Telling it like it is, good pacing and structure in each chapter. Interesting big and small life events building towards more and more clarity and ease of living. This book is not instructional at all but it did leave me with something I am glad to have.
Winnowing Book Review – A Demanding, Worthwhile Read
“What began as rigid disciplines softened into gentle rhythms.” – Kira
This was a hard read. Not because the writing itself is difficult, but because I kept getting lost in my own thoughts as I read her words. As a mediator, facilitator, and structural consultant, I work toward understanding, not necessarily agreement or disagreement.
I tend to speak in sarcasm; she speaks in poetry.
My life feels like it’s diverging; her life seems to be converging.
At the same point in our lives, I read Peretti and fought real-world demons; she channeled warmth and unseen spirits.
Yet we share common ground. We both studied structural consulting and systems thinking. Creating is not a feeling; it is a discipline.
We both asked the same question: “Did my prayer make any difference?” I, too, came to a similar conclusion: “The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.”
Once I suspended my biases, I could read her book in earnest. Our end goals may be similar, but the paths we travel are very different. That’s what made reading *Winnowing* such an insightful and delightful experience.
At one point, I had to stop and reflect on myself for a long time. On page 147, the line “to get out from under the voices in my head and their relentless loop of doom and gloom” felt like a direct reflection of me. This is what a good book should do: it’s not ultimately about the author; it’s about you. What value do *I* get from reading the book? Several places in *Winnowing* did this for me.
At another point, I became very agitated—not with the writing, but with the concept, “I just need to rest.” I, too, need to rest, but I find it nearly impossible to have that kind of relationship with anyone but my spouse. I’m a retired rocket scientist—yes, really. Either the conversation goes over people’s heads, and they listen politely, or it turns into two hardcore engineers trying to prove points.
My biggest insight came from something I had also discovered and have been trying to reconcile for some time. On page 189, she writes, “I no longer buy the idea that everything happens for a reason.” I agree. The reason isn’t some mystical life lesson; it’s that I made a decision, and what happened is the result of that decision.
Later in the book (page 214), she offers “a distinct contradiction to what some book authors claim: no muse needed.” I felt that would be a great launching point for a lively conversation about creating. I’m sure neither of us believes that creativity is left to chance—it’s not. While I don’t believe in sudden epiphanies, I do see value in muses—not as magical fairies that show up randomly, but as a disciplined way of engaging with the creative process.
Her book concludes with ten things that help “her navigate.” This was a thoughtful ending because it’s about her, not you, the reader. To quote my TKO Master, tongue in cheek, “I can no longer be your guide; you, too, Grasshopper, must find your own way.”
Then she leaves us with the book’s true nature: “Basically, this is a letter to your younger self.”
After reading her final quote, I reflected on my own unfinished memoirs and on a book I read long ago: *The Last Lecture* by Randy Pausch.
*Winnowing* did what any book worthy of my time should do: it moved me to a new place in my life—for the better.
While I don’t consider myself a spiritual person, I found this book compelling on many levels.
- It’s courageous: sharing this kind of personal and intimate journey takes hutzpah, gumption, and a generous spirit. Why choose personal inquiry when we have so many other distractions? Because maybe what I share will help or affirm someone else? We could use more of this intent in our current world.
- It’s elegant: The prose is rich and sonorous. The structure is appealing and inviting. Even the formatting and style make it impressive and artful. (Caveat: I’m a big reader. I appreciate good writing!)
- It’s accessible: I’ve always thought I should be more spiritual. I’ve often wondered why I’ve never embarked on some kind of personal spiritual journey. In my younger years I read Pema Chödrön, Thich Nhat Hanh, and other authors sharing profound thoughts, yet I never felt “evolved” enough to follow the paths they subscribed. This book is DIFFERENT - and appeals to those of us not currently on a spiritual path.
- It’s invitational: I’ve been reluctant to embark on the seeker’s path in any kind of meaningful way. (I had no kind of religious training). This book, however, invited me to explore and access the “angels” in my life. It offered me a way to seek the grace that has been offered to me. Since reading the book, I’ve had many dreams about my deceased mother. She just shows up, and I’m so happy to see her, despite our tumultuous history.
After reading this intimate and captivating memoir, I now realize I’ve been limiting my field of vision. I feel ready to open my eyes and heart.
I’m unsure about other people’s associations with the word “memoir”, but mine were largely formed around this duality: either stories of bloviated grandeur by highly inflated egos, or small introspective attempts to elevate the mundane experience of life into universal relevance. As a result, I steer clear of memoirs.
However, Kira Higgs’ remarkable “Winnowing” is a profound reimagining of the memoir: a compelling and relatable journey spun with muscle and thrust in search of true spiritual experience. I find that I simply cannot put this book down. Kira’s search for a spiritual path has such depth and integrity that I am now fully invested in each startling twist and turn in her story, each peak and valley of her quest. I no longer start my day by doomscrolling - I start my day with “Winnowing”.
This book is a clarion call towards our own personal search for spiritual meaning - outside, but not excluding the traditionally approved influences in our respective cultures.
Thank you Kira for shining your very clear light into the murk of modern-day meaning.
If you are toying with the idea of spirituality and meditation, this is the go-to book. It’s not a how-to, but a beautifully written dive into the longing we may all face as we travel through our lives. That journey may include stops and starts, as well as long stretches that quietly invite our own transformation.
Kira Higgs is an amazing writer who shares her spiritual experiences through eloquent prose, while gently inviting the reader into their own awakening—one thoughtful moment at a time. In the end, Winnowing is not about finding answers, but about allowing ourselves the space to ask better questions.
It reminds us that growth doesn’t always arrive in grand gestures but often unfolds in quiet realizations over time (I needed to read this to slow myself down a tad). And, right there, perhaps, is the true gift of this book. I highly recommend Winnowing for anyone quietly seeking something larger than themselves.
An intimate and thought provoking book. This is not a typical memoir. Instead of the usual chronological recitation of life events, rather short episodes (chapters) are grouped conceptually rather than ordered by time. In this way, the episodes build insights into Kira's journey in search of spiritual wisdom. They weave together, backwards and forwards, provoking a feeling of exploration on the part of the reader. This structure requires more work on the part of the reader than a linear account. I found myself regularly consulting the table of contents to remind myself of the chapters and sections I had already read, how they were grouped, and the titles of the sections chosen, e.g. "Going In." As in the best memoirs, Kira reveals much of her inner life and private thoughts, her missteps as well as successes, an adventure through a litany of spiritual practice that concludes in a place of contentment, in the end providing inspiration to consider one's own life journey.
I’m sitting at soccer practice on the sidelines with one of the Twins running the pitch. I’m glad for some freed mind space to join in the celebration of this incredible storytelling.
Higgs brings us along on a collective and welcoming journey of living with intentionality and thoughtfulness.
Her description of walking in Ashland versus the very competitive mind laser focused on vectors and goals and plays is what I’m witnessing even in this 4th grade level of recreation play. Higg’s words made me think of all the ways structures of success and achievement can lock us away from building connection in the organic way our souls need to expand, letting in universal truths. All we need to do is put one foot in front of the other and breathe.
I appreciate how the memoir gives each of us a gentle nudge; remember to walk through the world, soul wide open.
I just finished reading “Winnowing,” a new memoir by my college classmate Kira Higgs. I highly recommend it!
Kira and I were not close friends in college, but have gotten to know each other better through conversations at reunions and social media interactions. So at best it’s been a few snapshots that don’t adequately convey the past several decades of our lives.
“Winnowing” tells the stories of her life—athletic achievements, professional and personal accomplishments and setbacks. She developed a meditation practice years ago, and the main thread running through the stories is how mindfulness has impacted her life and work.
What a lovely, thoughtful memoir! Higgs takes the reader along with her on her spiritual journey, never proselytizing yet generously sharing her thoughts and experiences. Our paths are vastly different, yet I felt a kinship with her as I read, admiring her tenacity as she strives to transcend the ordinary.
Engaging memoir - Higgs has the gift of inspiring by sharing her life journey with a lightness and joy that makes it a real pleasure to read. No doctrine, no attempt to convert or convince. A delightful read.