The Ick Files: An A–Z of Your Biggest Turnoffs

by Ari Cagan (Editor), John Hammond (Editor)

The ultimate compendium of cringe-worthy libido-killing dating behavior.

You know the someone you might find cute says or does one tiny thing so profoundly unsexy that your attraction vanishes instantly. gone. dead. canceled.

Congratulations. You’ve got the ick.

And you’re far from alone.

The Ick Files is an A-to-Z catalogue of more than 175 real-life cases of instant attraction annihilation. Equal parts anthropological study and cautionary tale, The Ick Files explores the bizarre, irrational, painfully specific behaviors that instantly kill attraction—and unite daters everywhere in horrified solidarity.

Prime offenders

- A guy who doesn’t believe in brushing his teeth.
- A guy who golf claps after a good hook up.
- A girl who owns thirty stuffed animals and kisses every single one of them goodnight before she goes to sleep.
- A guy who brings his laundry to an apartment dinner date.

And many more too icky to even put on the outside of a book.

Based on the popular Instagram @SubmitYourIck, and featuring fan-favorite submissions and new entries you’ll wish you could unsee, The Ick Files turns the internet’s most unromantic romantic confessions into the best type of secondhand embarrassment.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor

224 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 1, 2026

Reviews

[Mai T.]

Non-fiction November TBR

📱 Thank you to NetGalley and S&S/Simon Element

[Katie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was very funny and very cringey.

[d9fqdfnka]

As other reviewers have noted there are a number of ableist excerpts:
"Probably not even five minutes into having sex, he just [stops] and goes “Sorry, I get a bit tired.” Then he just sits there and [keeps] repeating “I’m out of breath” to himself. I let myself out."
"An ambulance was coming down the street and he plugged his ears with his index fingers. Any man that does this grosses me out." (There are people with sensory issues.)
As much as this icks out other people, I find it problematic that these icks are put next to anecdotes of men simply being assholes. It might make the reader think that there is everything wrong with being disabled. All in all I didn't like this book

[Hannah Gamber · Rating 2 out of 5]

I won this in a Goodreads giveaway, thank you to Simon & Schuster and Goodreads for this opportunity.

Positives first: I want to say that this was a cute concept for a novelty book. I had a good time reading all the icks and quoting some of them to my friends. We had some fun back and forth about a few of them, so I can imagine this would be a popular addition to gift giving occasions. However...

The negative: A good portion of the interior illustrations look very much like they are AI generated. Some of them appear to be photo-bashed together with a real illustration, which is particularly jarring. I know a lot of people have varying opinions about AI, but I personally can't stand it and it really tainted my reading experience even if it was just dressing around the ick entries. I also find it very strange, because all of them are trying to imitate Victorian sketches - are there not a ton of those in public domain? Why did they need to be generated? Personally, that gives ME the ick, especially when they are going to be charging 22 USD for this ~200 page book. At that price, they can't pay someone to dig through public domain to find enough illustrations of Victorians making stinky faces? Personally, if I really wanted to buy this book, I'd wait for it to appear in outlet and secondhand stores.

[Clara · Rating 3 out of 5]

For the fun

[Kuu [semi-ia for china reasons] · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC.

3 stars because the book itself is fine, it's just wholly unnecessary. It's exactly what you would expect when you read the title, namely a list of icks, told in 2-3 sentence stories, sent in by people following this social media account or something?? Anyway. Exactly what you'd expect, but somehow I still had higher expectations because surely a published book would offer more than that, right? RIGHT????? (Not right.)

Some of the icks make me wonder why they're even in there, as they have somewhat ableist undertones, but most of them are just... Yeah. That's just icks. Some I understand, others I don't. Icks. Not very original, either. The funniest part of the entire book was this one woman (IN HER FORTIES????) whose ick was a comma in the greeting texts ("Hi, Emma" instead of "Hi Emma"), and the editor added a cursive note saying that this is technically grammatically correct. That's the funniest part of the entire book.

Again, this book isn't BAD, it's just boring. You can find so many stories like this online without spending money. I really wouldn't recommend you spend any money on this book. Get it from the library or something or like, scroll TikTok for Ick Lists. You'll get the same result, potentially even funnier.

[Elaine · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley for an ARC of The Icktionary.

I'm not on social media so the Ick Files was not familiar to me.

This was delightfully icky though a few were not total dealbreakers.

However, from personal experience, if a person has one ick, they will have others - and those will have you running for the hills.

This is a super short read, sparse with no additional text, art, or commentary.

The personal anecdotes are hilarious, some are just messy and downright gross, so readers should be aware in case they're squeamish about sex and bodily fluids.

I would have liked to hear from the authors; their personal experiences and what led them to create this, how it all began, and how it has brought people from all over the world to share their utmost embarrassments.

What about funny art and/or illustrations to headline each chapter?

Social media has many cons and few pros, but one pro I do champion is how sharing your personal stories reminds you that you're not alone with the ickiness and messiness that is life.

[Marinna · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Icktionary: An A to Z of the Biggest Dating Turnoffs by Ari Cagan and John Hammond is a compilation of bad dating experiences. Short snippets allow this book to be a very quick read or something entertaining to pick up when you need a chuckle. The Icktionary is thoroughly entertaining and guaranteed to give you second-hand embarrassment!

I think this book would be an enjoyable for anyone who’s gone on a bad date or experienced off-putting behaviors from a romantic interest. Obviously, this is targeted to a mature audience and sexual descriptions are more or less on every page.

I was not familiar with ‘The Ick’ Instagram page prior to picking this up. It reminds me of the millennial equivalent of Texts From Last Night or Post Secret, but specifically for dating. The relatable factor supersedes generations.

Thank you to NetGalley, Simon Element, S&S/Simon Element, and the authors Ari Cagan and John Hammond for an ARC of The Icktionary in exchange for an honest review!

[Gretchen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the opportunity to review the ARC of this e-book.

3 stars - It was ok

I had not heard of the Instagram account SubmitYourIck, which this book is based on/assembled from, but looking at that account, it does have some funny dating “Icks.” This book, however didn’t have enough of them. It was VERY short. Some
of the “Icks” were funny, but a lot of them were just “cringey” (basically second-hand embarrassment), and some were neither.

I guess I expected more from a book; this one seemed more like one of those old lists of things that would be emailed around, or maybe like a Buzzfeed listicle.

[Wendi Manning · Rating 3 out of 5]

Cool, Buzzfeed on my Kindle! Oh, this isn’t a Buzzfeed article, sorry. It reads like one. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. In this case, it is.

This was funny. I enjoyed it, but I would have liked it to be longer and the book more fleshed out. This came off like a printout of social media posts and nothing more. The authors could have put in some effort.

It’s funny, but I can’t recommend paying for this one. It’s too short for that.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC, all opinions are my own.

[McKenzie Richardson · Rating 3 out of 5]

For more bookish opinions, visit my blog: Craft-Cycle

A humorous collection of dating woes from around the world that may just make you feel a bit better about your own dating life.

I hadn't seen @SubmitYourIck on Instagram before, but was pulled in by the title. Definitely a fun read.

Honestly, the collection will have you feeling pretty good about yourself and your own ick-inducing habits. Unless the entry is about you. Then that's rough. But at least you many an untold number of strangers laugh.

A fun book to page through or read in one go.

[Megan · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was.... fine. It wasn't really funny and it wasn't really bad. It was just fine. Some of the complaints seemed really nitpicky or really condescending. Others just seemed like an excuse for dumping the other person. I thought it would be a lot funnier and more of a explanation book and not just 2 sentence stories from random people. This really wasn't for me and a lot of the stories gave me the ick from the people that wrote them.

[Debra · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you Simon Element for my free copy!

Oh. My. Goodness. Some people…wow! The best part is that these are all real, as submitted to The Ick. Some people do weird things. And some people are weirded out by pretty normal things. And some people think very highly of themselves. I was impressed at the wide variety of things presented—they did a great job curating! This is a very giftable book, and a quick, entertaining read. Adult content here people, but not X-rated.

[Lisa Davidson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was planning on using this as a book to read really slowly. But no. That didn't work. I couldn't stop reading because I couldn't stop laughing and then I was like wait, what's the Instagram page like? And then I laughed so hard I cried.
I highly recommend, unless you don't enjoy laughing.
Thanks to NetGalley for letting me read this

[Hannah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wanted to love this, but largely (though not entirely) it's made up of behavior that would have been perfectly acceptable if the recipient had even a modicum of humor. The notion of things being "cringe" has made us so afraid of perpetuating, or even WITNESSING, silly or whimsical behavior. God forbid.

[Bebo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me an ARC of this book for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

The @submityourick instagram account has given me many laughs, so I was excited to read this collection of submissions, and it certainly did not disappoint! Makes me very happy that I ended up married to someone nice and normal because what even is wrong with some of these people???

[Alyssa · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Icktionary is a hilarious read. If you love slice of life humor and the strange things people do, this book is for you. Not all of the icks made sense to me, but thats the wonder of the human experience. I truly enjoyed reading it.

[Ashley (scatteredthistle) · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fun trip through some pretty funny dating icks. A lot of them were really funny but a few I kept thinking why would that be an ick and then realized because you’re an absolute nerd and they aren’t. 🤣

[Kandace · Rating 5 out of 5]

Received as an ARC through NetGalley. Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley.


A short and sweet review. Hilarious! Need more.

[John Anderson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quick read. Was basically a "Buzzfeed" article in book form.....or in this case, e-book form and who doesn't love a good "Buzzfeed" article?

[Tina · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received this book through a Goodreads Giveaway.

Mildly entertaining. Had a few good chuckles and a few Ick moments. A fun read.

[Kathryn Salimi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is hilarious! Such a fun book to read through and meep on your coffee table. It’s definitely a conversation starter!

[Sophie Collins · Rating 2 out of 5]

Funny in parts but mostly boring

[Athena · Rating 3 out of 5]

Highly entertaining. Makes you feel better each time you read an Ick you have neither experienced nor caused.

Thank you to Simon Element for my copy.

[Paige · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you Simon Element for a free copy of this book in exchange for my fair and honest opinion.

[Matúš · Rating 4 out of 5]

Funny shit. I can't believe (some of) these people inhabit the same world I do.

[Libraryanne · Rating 3.5 out of 5]

People are funny and weird. I appreciated that it included “Ick” moments from both genders. Content Warning: There were a few short but explicit entries.

[Maggie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some of these dating stories had me questioning where they found some of these people to date. They were wild.

[Ashley (scatteredthistle) · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fun trip through some pretty funny dating icks. A lot of them were really funny but a few I kept thinking why would that be an ick and then realized because you’re an absolute nerd and they aren’t. 🤣

[Laurie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This isn’t a book. A book proposal, perhaps, or a first draft of a book that could be interesting and funny.

It takes about thirty minutes to read the list of contributions posted on, I believe, Substack and Instagram accounts. These pages are dedicated to cataloguing the moment and incident that firmly ended a potential or established romantic relationship, because of something the partner said or did.

These would be things like personal habits, an uttered phrase or manner of speaking, public behavior, and more. And when this happens, you instantly know it’s over, because the creeping “ick” you just felt can never be forgotten.

A fun concept; however, the problem is that I expected so much more than a copy and paste of social media commentary. Perhaps clever introductions for each post providing critiques of the incident. How about grouping them together by common threads? An ick level rating scale? Quotes from movies and television shows (Elaine to Jerry on “Seinfeld”: “Why’d you break up with her?” Jerry to Elaine: “She eats her peas one at a time.”).

It seems much more could—and should—be done to make this clever concept into a book worth buying.

Thank you to NetGalley and publisher S&S/Simon Element for the advance reader copy.