What do you think?
Rate this book
The Role of Mom Will Be Played By: The Year I Had a Baby and Became Myself
Perfect for new mothers and mothers-to-be, this deeply personal and funny memoir from a beloved actress and storyteller reveals why motherhood isn’t just a new chapter in your life—it’s a metamorphosis.
As the creator of the witty humor account @ShawnatheMom that delights more than 4 million followers with her comedy skits, Shawna Lander knows what it’s like to play a lot of different roles. But before she ever took to the online “stage,” her role as a mom changed everything, not only about her life, but about her identity. Like many first-time mothers, she imagined her baby as a beautiful addition to her life—and instead found that every aspect of her world changed completely so that her new life could begin.
Through motherhood, Shawna was reborn. And in The Role of Mom Will Be Played By, she’s sharing her empowering, transformative journey for the first time.
Through candid anecdotes and humorous reflections, Shawna reveals how motherhood reshaped her identity, worldview, relationships, and understanding of human worth. She debunks the prettily romanticized version of motherhood, presenting it instead as a raw, challenging, and profoundly rewarding experience.
Central to this heartfelt book is the belief that every mother's journey is linked and, while there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting, the magnitude of the experience is universal. She captures the essence of motherhood as weird, gross, profound, mundane, and incredibly personal—all at once.
The Role of Mom Will Be Played By is a celebration of the resilience, love, and humor that defines motherhood. Shawna’s authentic voice and relatable experiences provide comfort and inspiration to anyone on the extraordinary journey of becoming a mom, offering wisdom, support, and a deep appreciation for the beautiful chaos.
As the creator of the witty humor account @ShawnatheMom that delights more than 4 million followers with her comedy skits, Shawna Lander knows what it’s like to play a lot of different roles. But before she ever took to the online “stage,” her role as a mom changed everything, not only about her life, but about her identity. Like many first-time mothers, she imagined her baby as a beautiful addition to her life—and instead found that every aspect of her world changed completely so that her new life could begin.
Through motherhood, Shawna was reborn. And in The Role of Mom Will Be Played By, she’s sharing her empowering, transformative journey for the first time.
Through candid anecdotes and humorous reflections, Shawna reveals how motherhood reshaped her identity, worldview, relationships, and understanding of human worth. She debunks the prettily romanticized version of motherhood, presenting it instead as a raw, challenging, and profoundly rewarding experience.
Central to this heartfelt book is the belief that every mother's journey is linked and, while there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting, the magnitude of the experience is universal. She captures the essence of motherhood as weird, gross, profound, mundane, and incredibly personal—all at once.
The Role of Mom Will Be Played By is a celebration of the resilience, love, and humor that defines motherhood. Shawna’s authentic voice and relatable experiences provide comfort and inspiration to anyone on the extraordinary journey of becoming a mom, offering wisdom, support, and a deep appreciation for the beautiful chaos.
303 pages, Kindle Edition
Published October 20, 2026
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
⭐⭐⭐💫 Learning the Role While Living It
Motherhood is often described as something instinctive, as if love and certainty arrive together. Shawna Lander’s memoir The Role of Mom Will Be Played By: The Year I Had a Baby and Became Myself pushes against that idea almost immediately. She wanted to become a mother, but wanting a child did not mean that motherhood arrived with confidence or a clear sense of what she was supposed to feel. Lander is open about her fears, reservations, exhaustion, and the sense that she was learning the role while already being expected to perform it. That honesty gives the memoir its strongest moments. I do not have children, but I still found her perspective easy to understand, especially because she never pretends that love automatically erases anxiety or the loss of parts of your former identity.
The memoir also does a good job showing that becoming a parent affects more than just the mother. Her husband comes across as supportive, but there is still a sense that both parents are adjusting to a life that has changed dramatically. The family material adds another layer, even when some of those relationships are complicated or slightly strange. At the same time, the book does tend to circle the same emotional territory. Fear, exhaustion, uncertainty, and frustration are revisited often enough that some of the reflection begins to feel repetitive rather than increasingly revealing. The negative side of early motherhood also dominates much of the memoir, which is understandable given Lander’s experience, but it occasionally makes the emotional balance feel narrow.
One smaller stylistic choice also continued to bother me. Lander refers to her child almost exclusively as “baby,” while her husband, sisters, and other family members are named. I understand that this may have been a privacy decision and that keeping the child somewhat anonymous helps center the memoir on Lander’s experience of becoming a mother. Still, the constant repetition of “baby” eventually felt impersonal to me, especially when everyone else was individualized. I kept expecting that choice to lead to some kind of name reveal or greater significance by the end, but it never did. Even with those criticisms, I appreciated the candor at the heart of the book. Lander’s strongest contribution is her willingness to admit that motherhood can be wanted, meaningful, frightening, exhausting, and uncertain all at once.
Thank you to NetGalley, author Shawna Lander, and Brilliance Publishing / Brilliance Audio for an ALC in exchange for an honest review.
#NetGalley #TheRoleOfMomWillBePlayedBy
Motherhood is often described as something instinctive, as if love and certainty arrive together. Shawna Lander’s memoir The Role of Mom Will Be Played By: The Year I Had a Baby and Became Myself pushes against that idea almost immediately. She wanted to become a mother, but wanting a child did not mean that motherhood arrived with confidence or a clear sense of what she was supposed to feel. Lander is open about her fears, reservations, exhaustion, and the sense that she was learning the role while already being expected to perform it. That honesty gives the memoir its strongest moments. I do not have children, but I still found her perspective easy to understand, especially because she never pretends that love automatically erases anxiety or the loss of parts of your former identity.
The memoir also does a good job showing that becoming a parent affects more than just the mother. Her husband comes across as supportive, but there is still a sense that both parents are adjusting to a life that has changed dramatically. The family material adds another layer, even when some of those relationships are complicated or slightly strange. At the same time, the book does tend to circle the same emotional territory. Fear, exhaustion, uncertainty, and frustration are revisited often enough that some of the reflection begins to feel repetitive rather than increasingly revealing. The negative side of early motherhood also dominates much of the memoir, which is understandable given Lander’s experience, but it occasionally makes the emotional balance feel narrow.
One smaller stylistic choice also continued to bother me. Lander refers to her child almost exclusively as “baby,” while her husband, sisters, and other family members are named. I understand that this may have been a privacy decision and that keeping the child somewhat anonymous helps center the memoir on Lander’s experience of becoming a mother. Still, the constant repetition of “baby” eventually felt impersonal to me, especially when everyone else was individualized. I kept expecting that choice to lead to some kind of name reveal or greater significance by the end, but it never did. Even with those criticisms, I appreciated the candor at the heart of the book. Lander’s strongest contribution is her willingness to admit that motherhood can be wanted, meaningful, frightening, exhausting, and uncertain all at once.
Thank you to NetGalley, author Shawna Lander, and Brilliance Publishing / Brilliance Audio for an ALC in exchange for an honest review.
#NetGalley #TheRoleOfMomWillBePlayedBy
October 9, 2026
I have been listening to ‘The Role Of Mom Will Be Played By’ this week on my morning walks.
I am a 50 yr old mum of 5, my oldest is 31 and my youngest is 11, well past the ‘new mother stage’, but I still connected with the retelling of Shawna’s experience in a profound way.
I laughed, I nodded along, and to my dog’s concern at times, I also cried.
I feel like I have ended this week with a little more understanding about myself and healed a little trauma along the way.
I have been a big fan of Shawna for many years watching her career bloom. I am so proud of her 🩷
I am a 50 yr old mum of 5, my oldest is 31 and my youngest is 11, well past the ‘new mother stage’, but I still connected with the retelling of Shawna’s experience in a profound way.
I laughed, I nodded along, and to my dog’s concern at times, I also cried.
I feel like I have ended this week with a little more understanding about myself and healed a little trauma along the way.
I have been a big fan of Shawna for many years watching her career bloom. I am so proud of her 🩷
Review of advance copy received from Edelweiss+
DRC from Edelweiss
Shawna’s memoir completely lived up to my love for her “Shawnaverse” videos. Reading about Shawna’s experiences becoming a mother has deepened my enjoyment of her content because, as she says herself, it’s so real and we just don’t see enough of that. This memoir feels like a conversation with Shawna, filled with tears (both happy and sad) as she shares her most vulnerable, funny, and unfiltered moments. Her voice is just as authentic on the page as it is on screen, and I found myself smiling, laughing, and tearing up right alongside her lived experiences.
What surprised me most is how deeply this book resonated with me even though I’m not yet a mother. Shawna’s honesty about identity, expectations, and the emotional complexity of motherhood made me feel seen in ways I didn’t expect. It’s rare to find a memoir that is both so personal and so universally comforting. This was an easy five-star read for me! I can guarantee I will come back to it when I begin my own journey in motherhood.
Shawna’s memoir completely lived up to my love for her “Shawnaverse” videos. Reading about Shawna’s experiences becoming a mother has deepened my enjoyment of her content because, as she says herself, it’s so real and we just don’t see enough of that. This memoir feels like a conversation with Shawna, filled with tears (both happy and sad) as she shares her most vulnerable, funny, and unfiltered moments. Her voice is just as authentic on the page as it is on screen, and I found myself smiling, laughing, and tearing up right alongside her lived experiences.
What surprised me most is how deeply this book resonated with me even though I’m not yet a mother. Shawna’s honesty about identity, expectations, and the emotional complexity of motherhood made me feel seen in ways I didn’t expect. It’s rare to find a memoir that is both so personal and so universally comforting. This was an easy five-star read for me! I can guarantee I will come back to it when I begin my own journey in motherhood.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
*I received a copy of this book on NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. Thank you to the author, publisher, and NetGalley for this opportunity*
Full disclosure: I am a huge fan of Shawna and her work on social media as @Shawnathemom, so while my opinion expressed in this review is genuine, I am biased!!
In THE ROLE OF MOM WILL BE PLAYED BY, author Shawna Lander takes us through her metamorphosis into being her baby's mother. The painful growth she underwent not only physically (because growing a baby will never be easy, or go exactly how you thought it would), but also mentally and emotionally. Lander explores her different perspectives and interpretations of motherhood throughout various stages in her life, as well as her own somewhat tenuous relationship with her mother and how that influences her choices as a new mom. She tackles these tough topics with humor and grace; grace not only for herself at each stage of life and maturity, but also for all other women struggling with the same unspoken issues.
Lander is well known for tackling difficult and emotional family relationships with tact and a seemingly endless well of understanding-- so it was an eye-opening experience to 'peek behind the curtain' to the motivation behind her creations on social media. So many of the topics Lander covers in her videos tie into her own life experiences, and it was amazing to read about the amount of personal growth and work Lander has put into her own life.
I also enjoyed Lander's narration! I think she did a great job of adding inflection into each person's voice (with some familiar voices making unexpected appearances!), as well as adding an acting flair to some of the dialogue and action.
All in all, I think this would be a great book for a new parent, or someone considering having a child; Lander is very candid about her struggles as a new parent, but she also does a wonderful job of expressing her joy in her role as mom.
Full disclosure: I am a huge fan of Shawna and her work on social media as @Shawnathemom, so while my opinion expressed in this review is genuine, I am biased!!
In THE ROLE OF MOM WILL BE PLAYED BY, author Shawna Lander takes us through her metamorphosis into being her baby's mother. The painful growth she underwent not only physically (because growing a baby will never be easy, or go exactly how you thought it would), but also mentally and emotionally. Lander explores her different perspectives and interpretations of motherhood throughout various stages in her life, as well as her own somewhat tenuous relationship with her mother and how that influences her choices as a new mom. She tackles these tough topics with humor and grace; grace not only for herself at each stage of life and maturity, but also for all other women struggling with the same unspoken issues.
Lander is well known for tackling difficult and emotional family relationships with tact and a seemingly endless well of understanding-- so it was an eye-opening experience to 'peek behind the curtain' to the motivation behind her creations on social media. So many of the topics Lander covers in her videos tie into her own life experiences, and it was amazing to read about the amount of personal growth and work Lander has put into her own life.
I also enjoyed Lander's narration! I think she did a great job of adding inflection into each person's voice (with some familiar voices making unexpected appearances!), as well as adding an acting flair to some of the dialogue and action.
All in all, I think this would be a great book for a new parent, or someone considering having a child; Lander is very candid about her struggles as a new parent, but she also does a wonderful job of expressing her joy in her role as mom.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
I enjoy Shawna Lander's one-woman-show style Instagram account where she explores womanhood and motherhood through dozens of characters all of whom she plays quite well and quite convincingly, to the point I often forget that she is the actress behind all of them. Her memoir shows another side to her writing talent, as she describes the experience of becoming a mother and how it changed her emotionally, psychologically, and professionally. I feel like I've read a lot of books about motherhood, but this one captures the emotions of those early days with a newborn so perfectly and so beautifully. My kids are all beyond the baby, toddler, and preschool stages at this point, but I wish this book had been around when I had my first newborn so I would know that my experiences were normal. I also think Shawna gives some perspective to those early days that is helpful to read about even as a more seasoned parent.
I listened to the audiobook (thanks, Brilliance Audio and Netgalley!) and I enjoyed the fact that Shawna uses some of her Shawnaverse voices for the people in her life, and I had to wonder whether each voice matched with a real-life inspiration behind its associated character. I don't think there is a one-to-one correspondence between every character and a real member of Shawna's family, but it was interesting to learn of her background and her husband John's, and to see what might inform the issues she addresses in her sketches.
Though this is not a book about the development of Shawna's characters, I think it is still a satisfying read for her fans, and I think listening to her familiar voice read it will really appeal to her regular followers. I also think any mother will relate to Shawna's journey, even those not previously familiar with her work. This was a solid memoir that will stick with me.
I listened to the audiobook (thanks, Brilliance Audio and Netgalley!) and I enjoyed the fact that Shawna uses some of her Shawnaverse voices for the people in her life, and I had to wonder whether each voice matched with a real-life inspiration behind its associated character. I don't think there is a one-to-one correspondence between every character and a real member of Shawna's family, but it was interesting to learn of her background and her husband John's, and to see what might inform the issues she addresses in her sketches.
Though this is not a book about the development of Shawna's characters, I think it is still a satisfying read for her fans, and I think listening to her familiar voice read it will really appeal to her regular followers. I also think any mother will relate to Shawna's journey, even those not previously familiar with her work. This was a solid memoir that will stick with me.
Review of advance copy
I bought a copy of this book at an author signing event and couldn't help reviewing it.
When my bonus daughter and I discovered Shawna The Mom was doing a tour stop near us for her new memoir we immediately grabbed tickets. We share a love for STM's skit content exploring the interpersonal relationship ups and downs of motherhood, complicated family dynamics, and a wide variety of women's stories.
Unsurprisingly, the same warmth, humor, and sensitivity shines in Shawna Lander's real life story, where she reveals with raw honesty her journey through pregnancy, birth, and the first year of motherhood. The Role Of Mom Will Be Played By: The Year I Had a Baby and Became Myself takes us along a path moms don't talk about much, even with each other, unless they're caught at a particularly vulnerable moment. I caveat that by saying I'm a stepmom who had a different road beginning with pre-teens, but everyone I've supported during pregnancy and early motherhood eventually diminishes the hard, scary, horrible parts of the changes in their lives with blanket "it's all worth it" platitudes. Society puts so much pressure on moms to never complain, to sacrifice everything they are and disappear in favor of "the family," that their stories have been quashed forever. Lander not only comes to that conclusion during moments in social situations in the book, she recounts her realization that she has a unique calling and skillset to change that culturally-encouraged silence.
Lander's writing is vivid and evocative. At no point does the reader feel outside her experience, which is both wonderfully immersive and sometimes empathetically uncomfortable, exactly as it should be. I wanted to give all the moms in my life a hug after I finished it. The only trouble I had was some direct crossover of the memoir and Shawna The Mom skits: every time John spoke in the book I heard him in the fictional-skit John's voice, and I heard Barb in someone else. Oops? Or, thank you?
Obviously, I loved this book. I wheeze-laughed out loud at some of the stories (oh my GAWD John with the gift bag). I also felt so much empathy, anger on a new mom's behalf, and even some moments that resonated with me from a stepmom perspective. It reminded me that all change, even the best possible change, is often a fraught, shitty mess you're not prepared for until you get through it. I finished it in a day because I couldn't put it down. Five stars, highly recommend for anyone who is a mom, who has a mom, or who wants to have some insight into what moms experience.
https://jessicasettergren.com/2026/10...
When my bonus daughter and I discovered Shawna The Mom was doing a tour stop near us for her new memoir we immediately grabbed tickets. We share a love for STM's skit content exploring the interpersonal relationship ups and downs of motherhood, complicated family dynamics, and a wide variety of women's stories.
Unsurprisingly, the same warmth, humor, and sensitivity shines in Shawna Lander's real life story, where she reveals with raw honesty her journey through pregnancy, birth, and the first year of motherhood. The Role Of Mom Will Be Played By: The Year I Had a Baby and Became Myself takes us along a path moms don't talk about much, even with each other, unless they're caught at a particularly vulnerable moment. I caveat that by saying I'm a stepmom who had a different road beginning with pre-teens, but everyone I've supported during pregnancy and early motherhood eventually diminishes the hard, scary, horrible parts of the changes in their lives with blanket "it's all worth it" platitudes. Society puts so much pressure on moms to never complain, to sacrifice everything they are and disappear in favor of "the family," that their stories have been quashed forever. Lander not only comes to that conclusion during moments in social situations in the book, she recounts her realization that she has a unique calling and skillset to change that culturally-encouraged silence.
Lander's writing is vivid and evocative. At no point does the reader feel outside her experience, which is both wonderfully immersive and sometimes empathetically uncomfortable, exactly as it should be. I wanted to give all the moms in my life a hug after I finished it. The only trouble I had was some direct crossover of the memoir and Shawna The Mom skits: every time John spoke in the book I heard him in the fictional-skit John's voice, and I heard Barb in someone else. Oops? Or, thank you?
Obviously, I loved this book. I wheeze-laughed out loud at some of the stories (oh my GAWD John with the gift bag). I also felt so much empathy, anger on a new mom's behalf, and even some moments that resonated with me from a stepmom perspective. It reminded me that all change, even the best possible change, is often a fraught, shitty mess you're not prepared for until you get through it. I finished it in a day because I couldn't put it down. Five stars, highly recommend for anyone who is a mom, who has a mom, or who wants to have some insight into what moms experience.
https://jessicasettergren.com/2026/10...
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Wow, this book exceeded my expectations! I've seen and enjoyed Shawna's content many times in the past, but I haven't followed it so closely that I know every character and have seen every video. I thought it would be an interesting motherhood memoir, but this was even better.
I really appreciated that Shawna was vulnerable about her own upbringing, sharing about her pastor dad who struggled with drug use and her narcissistic mom who relied on her 3 daughters for emotional support/validation. It was also cool to read a memoir from a mom who didn't always know with 1000% clarity that she wanted to be a mom. I feel like people are not very open about the ambivalence that many of us experience, whether it's due to fear that you'll perpetuate your own fucked up family's issues on the next generation or something else. It was interesting to watch Shawna's perspective slowly shift as she allowed herself to be open to curiosity about what it would be like to be a mom.
SO many parts of this journey were raw and relatable and written in a way that hit really hard. The damn lactation consultant being SO PUSHY was one that had me groaning in frustration and nodding along with Shawna. It's wild how much of an impact one person like that can have on your whole journey.
By the end I started to notice how well Shawna had constructed the memoir. Some of the stories felt like "oh duh, the baby is going through a developmental leap, it's a hard time but it's not a big deal in the grand scheme of things." But 1) it's a HUGE deal as a new mom going through it for the first time and 2) the stories she chose all supported her overarching thesis that: you are the main character in your own life. You will only ever be a side character in the story of your child's life. Your job is to understand them and emotionally support them, but never to rely on them for your own emotional well being. You get to know them, care for them, love them deeply, even when you're frustrated and driven crazy, and it's part of your story, but not the whole story, even though it's this huge, special, transformative thing.
I'm still thinking about this memoir and will be for a long time. I highly recommend this one to all my mom friends and folks considering parenthood!
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC :)
I really appreciated that Shawna was vulnerable about her own upbringing, sharing about her pastor dad who struggled with drug use and her narcissistic mom who relied on her 3 daughters for emotional support/validation. It was also cool to read a memoir from a mom who didn't always know with 1000% clarity that she wanted to be a mom. I feel like people are not very open about the ambivalence that many of us experience, whether it's due to fear that you'll perpetuate your own fucked up family's issues on the next generation or something else. It was interesting to watch Shawna's perspective slowly shift as she allowed herself to be open to curiosity about what it would be like to be a mom.
SO many parts of this journey were raw and relatable and written in a way that hit really hard. The damn lactation consultant being SO PUSHY was one that had me groaning in frustration and nodding along with Shawna. It's wild how much of an impact one person like that can have on your whole journey.
By the end I started to notice how well Shawna had constructed the memoir. Some of the stories felt like "oh duh, the baby is going through a developmental leap, it's a hard time but it's not a big deal in the grand scheme of things." But 1) it's a HUGE deal as a new mom going through it for the first time and 2) the stories she chose all supported her overarching thesis that: you are the main character in your own life. You will only ever be a side character in the story of your child's life. Your job is to understand them and emotionally support them, but never to rely on them for your own emotional well being. You get to know them, care for them, love them deeply, even when you're frustrated and driven crazy, and it's part of your story, but not the whole story, even though it's this huge, special, transformative thing.
I'm still thinking about this memoir and will be for a long time. I highly recommend this one to all my mom friends and folks considering parenthood!
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC :)
Read
October 21, 2026I received a copy of this novel in thanks to the publisher and NetGalley.
"The Role of Mom Will Be Played By: The Year I Had a Baby and Became Myself" is a memoir by Shawna Lander. Shawna did not have the most "perfect" transition into motherhood, but her journey was all her own. Motherhood is seldom easy, but when you can learn to laugh at the small stuff, it is certainly more palatable.
Shawna Lander made a name for herself on social media, performing funny skits particularly about motherhood. She has long had aspirations to be an actress, and I found it really amazing to see how she took her acting dreams and was able to turn them into a comedic online persona that allowed her to still be present for her baby.
I really appreciated how raw and vulnerable Shawna was about her evolution into motherhood. She never saw herself as a mom exactly, but she was still elated, nonetheless. I think this is a familiar feeling for a lot of women, and it is wonderful to have those conversations because it shows that just because you were not the child who always dreamed of a big family does not mean you cannot be a great mom. A huge part of the human experience is evolving, and everyone is allowed to change their minds about everything.
A reoccurring theme in this novel is how Shawna's relationship with her own mother really influenced her motherhood journey. The boundary setting she was able to show is important for everyone to see; a parent does not get an automatic pass to disregard your needs just because they gave you life. It broke my heart at times to see how she struggled with her own mom, especially because birthing a baby is a time when I think most women really want their mom.
I really enjoyed learning more about Shawna and I think this memoir offers some highly relatable motherhood moments that so many women will relate to.
"The Role of Mom Will Be Played By: The Year I Had a Baby and Became Myself" is a memoir by Shawna Lander. Shawna did not have the most "perfect" transition into motherhood, but her journey was all her own. Motherhood is seldom easy, but when you can learn to laugh at the small stuff, it is certainly more palatable.
Shawna Lander made a name for herself on social media, performing funny skits particularly about motherhood. She has long had aspirations to be an actress, and I found it really amazing to see how she took her acting dreams and was able to turn them into a comedic online persona that allowed her to still be present for her baby.
I really appreciated how raw and vulnerable Shawna was about her evolution into motherhood. She never saw herself as a mom exactly, but she was still elated, nonetheless. I think this is a familiar feeling for a lot of women, and it is wonderful to have those conversations because it shows that just because you were not the child who always dreamed of a big family does not mean you cannot be a great mom. A huge part of the human experience is evolving, and everyone is allowed to change their minds about everything.
A reoccurring theme in this novel is how Shawna's relationship with her own mother really influenced her motherhood journey. The boundary setting she was able to show is important for everyone to see; a parent does not get an automatic pass to disregard your needs just because they gave you life. It broke my heart at times to see how she struggled with her own mom, especially because birthing a baby is a time when I think most women really want their mom.
I really enjoyed learning more about Shawna and I think this memoir offers some highly relatable motherhood moments that so many women will relate to.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Thanks NetGalley for the ALC copy of this book!
5/5 stars
OMG, Shawna!! After spending years getting to know Shawna McAllister and her family, it was such a treat to finally get to know Shawna Lander.
Shawna is literally the ONLY YouTuber I'm subscribed to, and whenever one of her reels pops up, I make sure everyone knows "my show is on." So obviously I was so excited to be approved for the ALC.
After years of watching Shawna play the McAllisters and all her other characters, I loved getting to know the woman behind them. She's incredibly candid about some of the more painful parts of her life. While she gives the lasting effects of childhood trauma, absent & abusive parents, and serious illness the attention they deserve, I especially appreciated hearing how she's managed to thrive despite it all. Obviously, I only know what she's chosen to share, but she seems to have built a genuinely happy, fulfilling life for herself and her family, and I loved hearing how she got there. There are so many stories of life's lows out there, but it's always good seeing how people manage to build joy out of them.
Having Shawna narrate her own story made it feel that much more personal, and hearing a couple of familiar voices along the way was such a sweet bonus.
I already adored this woman, but I have an even greater appreciation for her after reading this. Love, love, LOVED it. ❤️
5/5 stars
OMG, Shawna!! After spending years getting to know Shawna McAllister and her family, it was such a treat to finally get to know Shawna Lander.
Shawna is literally the ONLY YouTuber I'm subscribed to, and whenever one of her reels pops up, I make sure everyone knows "my show is on." So obviously I was so excited to be approved for the ALC.
After years of watching Shawna play the McAllisters and all her other characters, I loved getting to know the woman behind them. She's incredibly candid about some of the more painful parts of her life. While she gives the lasting effects of childhood trauma, absent & abusive parents, and serious illness the attention they deserve, I especially appreciated hearing how she's managed to thrive despite it all. Obviously, I only know what she's chosen to share, but she seems to have built a genuinely happy, fulfilling life for herself and her family, and I loved hearing how she got there. There are so many stories of life's lows out there, but it's always good seeing how people manage to build joy out of them.
Having Shawna narrate her own story made it feel that much more personal, and hearing a couple of familiar voices along the way was such a sweet bonus.
I already adored this woman, but I have an even greater appreciation for her after reading this. Love, love, LOVED it. ❤️
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Thank you to NetGalley, Brilliance Publishing, and Shawna Lander for the ALC of The Role of Mom Will Be Played By!
Like many other people I discovered Shawna through her skits on TikTok. I found her takes on motherhood and womanhood refreshing and followed her almost immediately. I was so excited to hear that she was coming out with a book and even more excited to learn she would be narrating it herself. Shawna had such a distinct style of storytelling and it really shone through in this book, especially the audiobook.
This story focused primarily on Shawna's pregnancy and first year of motherhood. It was a collection of moments that felt like such a true depiction of being a mother. Becoming "mom" is full of so many contradictions. There is simultaneous joy and despair in a way that you truly can't know until you've lived it. This is a book I wish I could have read back in my early days of motherhood when I was up at night with a baby feeling completely alone.
I will say I wasn't expecting the book to be as "out of order" as it was and it did make it feel a bit disconjointed at times. At the end I did still love it and think anyone who has or is planning to have kids should absolutely read it!
Like many other people I discovered Shawna through her skits on TikTok. I found her takes on motherhood and womanhood refreshing and followed her almost immediately. I was so excited to hear that she was coming out with a book and even more excited to learn she would be narrating it herself. Shawna had such a distinct style of storytelling and it really shone through in this book, especially the audiobook.
This story focused primarily on Shawna's pregnancy and first year of motherhood. It was a collection of moments that felt like such a true depiction of being a mother. Becoming "mom" is full of so many contradictions. There is simultaneous joy and despair in a way that you truly can't know until you've lived it. This is a book I wish I could have read back in my early days of motherhood when I was up at night with a baby feeling completely alone.
I will say I wasn't expecting the book to be as "out of order" as it was and it did make it feel a bit disconjointed at times. At the end I did still love it and think anyone who has or is planning to have kids should absolutely read it!
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
I loved this so much and found it deeply relatable. Shawna touches on everything from navigating the anxiety of trying to conceive, the trenches of newborn life, the struggles of being a team with your partner, the loneliness of middle of the night breastfeeding and pumping sessions, the mysterious disconnect with other moms in your life and the disappearing acts of people you were once close with.
This book really made me feel seen and I loved her courage to talk about the unpretty parts of new motherhood and about the feelings it brings to the surface. What she said about breaking herself open to build new parts really hit. Motherhood has a way of changing every relationship in your life, including the one you have with yourself. Shawna captured that beautifully.
Shawna narrates the book herself, which gives an authentic and intimate feel. She does a wonderful job with annunciation and pacing, and the flow of the storytelling with top-notch.
I think this book will make lots of other mothers feel seen, especially those having trouble reconciling the person they were before kids with the person they're becoming.
This book really made me feel seen and I loved her courage to talk about the unpretty parts of new motherhood and about the feelings it brings to the surface. What she said about breaking herself open to build new parts really hit. Motherhood has a way of changing every relationship in your life, including the one you have with yourself. Shawna captured that beautifully.
Shawna narrates the book herself, which gives an authentic and intimate feel. She does a wonderful job with annunciation and pacing, and the flow of the storytelling with top-notch.
I think this book will make lots of other mothers feel seen, especially those having trouble reconciling the person they were before kids with the person they're becoming.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Shawna is the most beautiful storyteller. In this motherhood memoir, she shares about the her change in desire to have a child, pregnancy, birth, and the first year of baby's life. She did not know much about the process, and explains every step so well that someone who does not have children can easily follow along with the journey. She voices concerns and details that mothers either can relate to or were not able to articulate themselves. This is one of the most beautiful birth stories I have read, not because it was perfect, but because it was raw and intimate. Shawna is also a wonderful teacher of emotional intelligence navigating tricky relationships and raising her child with intension.
Performing the audiobook herself, Shawna brings all the production and energy that fans of @shawnathemom have fallen in love with.
Performing the audiobook herself, Shawna brings all the production and energy that fans of @shawnathemom have fallen in love with.
October 11, 2026
Though it has been a number years since I experienced new motherhood, Shawna’s memoir pulled me back into the experience immediately. The way she describes her own journey in trying to conceive, pregnancy, and new motherhood is relatable, approachable, and incredibly honest.
I have been a follower of Shawna’s videos for quite a while and I really enjoyed getting to know a bit about the exceptional actress and person behind the characters.
Thank you to NetGalley and Brilliance audio for the ALC in exchange for an honest review.
I have been a follower of Shawna’s videos for quite a while and I really enjoyed getting to know a bit about the exceptional actress and person behind the characters.
Thank you to NetGalley and Brilliance audio for the ALC in exchange for an honest review.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
my best friend and i are always sending each other @shawnathemom reels on instagram, so i was excited to read her first book! this memoir is for all the new moms out there navigating the highs and lows of baby's first year, when nothing is fun, but every moment brings you so much joy. shawna's sweet anecdotes are both endearing and empowering, and i hope she continues to champion mom-centered stories. thank you to netgalley and the publisher for the ALC.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
I’m a fan of @shawnathemom on Instagram and knew I wanted to read this book as soon as it came out. As expected, she does a fantastic job narrating her story and doing the voices for different characters, IYKYK. So much of Shawna’s experience with motherhood resonated with me, and it reminded me that being open about the hard parts might help another mom feel less alone.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Cute and real story about motherhood. I like Shawna’s videos and this was just like them. She’s a great actress/ voice actress. I love that it was narrator by Shawna. This was a funny but also heartwarming read about real life motherhood. Thanks to Shawna Lander, the publisher and NetGalley for an audio arc in exchange for my honest review.
October 18, 2026
I was so excited to listen to this audiobook on NetGalley! Shawna Landers’ comedy sketches have been a balm to my soul as I heal from toxic family members. Listening to her story of becoming a mom validated so much of my own story in becoming a mom. Similar fears of failure and catastrophizing thoughts. This book is so valuable. I will recommend it to all new moms and infuse some aspects as examples in the Development unit of my AP Psychology course.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
A beautiful love letter to all mothers
October 14, 2026
I loved this book, and I’m so sad that I didn’t have it as a new mom. If you’re planning to become a mom—read this. If you’re a new mom—read this. If you’re a seasoned mom—read this.
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews