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Dying to Run: An Athlete's Quest for One More Finish
In a battle for survival and self-acceptance, Matt Fitzgerald is willing to risk it all to outrun chronic illness.
When sports journalist and bestselling author Matt Fitzgerald is struck by long COVID, his lifelong passion—running—becomes a distant memory, leaving him trapped in a failing body that simply won't cooperate. After authoring dozens of books and articles on athletes pushing the limits of human endurance, Fitzgerald is now forced to confront his own limits in ways he never imagined. Doctors have no answers and every day feels like an endless loop of misery and mental fog, but Fitzgerald is determined to reclaim his life and his passion.
Despite serious health risks, lack of training, and a body that has become utterly unreliable, he makes the reckless decision to run a 100-km ultramarathon in a record-breaking desert heatwave. It's an audacious gamble that could cost him dearly, but Fitzgerald won't surrender to chronic illness without a fight.
Drawing inspiration from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, and epic tales from Greek mythology, Fitzgerald embarks on a grueling physical and spiritual journey to discover what it truly means to live when your body betrays you. He has no idea if he'll find redemption or ruin in the scorching heat of the Sonoran Desert, but one thing is This is a race he can't afford to lose.
When sports journalist and bestselling author Matt Fitzgerald is struck by long COVID, his lifelong passion—running—becomes a distant memory, leaving him trapped in a failing body that simply won't cooperate. After authoring dozens of books and articles on athletes pushing the limits of human endurance, Fitzgerald is now forced to confront his own limits in ways he never imagined. Doctors have no answers and every day feels like an endless loop of misery and mental fog, but Fitzgerald is determined to reclaim his life and his passion.
Despite serious health risks, lack of training, and a body that has become utterly unreliable, he makes the reckless decision to run a 100-km ultramarathon in a record-breaking desert heatwave. It's an audacious gamble that could cost him dearly, but Fitzgerald won't surrender to chronic illness without a fight.
Drawing inspiration from ancient philosophy, modern psychology, and epic tales from Greek mythology, Fitzgerald embarks on a grueling physical and spiritual journey to discover what it truly means to live when your body betrays you. He has no idea if he'll find redemption or ruin in the scorching heat of the Sonoran Desert, but one thing is This is a race he can't afford to lose.
- GenresMemoir
264 pages, Paperback
Published September 8, 2026
About the author
Matt Fitzgerald
89 books437 followersMatt Fitzgerald is the author of numerous books on sports history and endurance sports. He has enjoyed unprecedented access to professional endurance athletes over the course of his career. His best-sellers include Racing Weight and Brain Training for Runners. He has also written extensively for Triathlete, Men's Fitness, Men's Health, Outside, Runner's World, Bicycling, Competitor, and countless other sports and fitness publications.
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Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews
Review of advance copy received from Author
This is a fantastic story about adversity and overcoming it. This is a great story and not just a race report. It’s also relatable to me as someone overcoming injury and wondering if I’ll ever get back. So many good takeaways. Really enjoyed it.
September 28, 2026
It’s been far too long since I last read a book by Matt Fitzgerald, one of my favourite authors. I love his writing style, his mindset, and his philosophy.
Review of advance copy received from Publisher
“Most will run to finish, a few to win. I alone will run to spite a disease that for four long years has threatened everything that makes life precious to me. I shouldn’t be doing what I’m about to do, and that’s exactly why I’m doing it.” –from the preface to “Dying to Run”
In 2020, Matt Fitzgerald, a prolific writer, running coach, and the author of numerous influential books on running, realized he had long COVID.
This is a person who once joined a professional running team to train at an elite level and write a book, the marvelous “Running the Dream.”
With long COVID, Fitzgerald couldn’t run; that’s what he told himself and others. The disease stole his enthusiasm and drained him of his characteristic zest. For the next three years, he turned his energy toward other runners. He coached, trained other coaches, and founded a “fantasy camp for runners” where “dreamers come to run, and runners live the dream.” He continued to write, even composing poems in his head when pain chained him to the bed.
“None of these projects fulfilled me in quite the same way running did,” he reports.
Fitzgerald learned to live with the daily challenge of an autoimmune disease that caused him to wake up feeling a thousand years old, every single day. He tried to get better, chasing the ever-elusive cure. Then, in 2023, he came to a different place emotionally.
“In my bones, where it really mattered, I no longer believed I would ever get better,” he writes. He calls that mental shift “thinking like a dying person” and describes it as “strangely liberating.”
“When it hit me that being healthy was not, in fact, a necessary condition for racing one more time—that I’d been lying to myself when I said I couldn’t run—I felt like a prison who’s just discovered his cell door has been unlocked the whole time.”
He walked out of prison and signed up for an audacious desert ultra called the Javelina Jundred. Not a 5K, not a half marathon: 100 kilometres through the Arizona desert. He swung for the fences, in other words.
Engrossed in the drama as I watched that baseball arc up into the sky, I read this book in a single day. It didn’t seem possible that a person with unresolved long COVID could tackle such an audacious physical and mental challenge and reach the finish line. But I rooted for him and his team of supporters every step of the way.
I love reading memoirs, and as a runner, I’ve read a lot of personal stories specific to my sport. This one stands out. Fitzgerald is a master storyteller with a meaningful story to tell. In this memoir, he confronts the big question everyone has to face at some point: Knowing we’re going to die, how do we choose to live?
This a gripping story, told with skill and the occasional glint of gallows humor. In these pages, we see a lifelong athlete coming to grips with mortality and finding the resources he needs to run “a race for closure.”
If you enjoy reading memoirs by athletes ...
If you have long COVID or myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome—or you love someone who does ...
If you’re a runner who gets inspired when you read another runner’s story about overcoming a barrier and achieving a goal ...
Then I predict “Dying to Run: An Athlete’s Quest for One More Finish” will be among your favorite books this year.
---
I bought an early copy of "Dying to Run" from the publisher because it sounded like "my kind of book," and it is. I have met Matt Fitzgerald on a few occasions, but this review is my own opinion, and I receive no reward for publishing it.
In 2020, Matt Fitzgerald, a prolific writer, running coach, and the author of numerous influential books on running, realized he had long COVID.
This is a person who once joined a professional running team to train at an elite level and write a book, the marvelous “Running the Dream.”
With long COVID, Fitzgerald couldn’t run; that’s what he told himself and others. The disease stole his enthusiasm and drained him of his characteristic zest. For the next three years, he turned his energy toward other runners. He coached, trained other coaches, and founded a “fantasy camp for runners” where “dreamers come to run, and runners live the dream.” He continued to write, even composing poems in his head when pain chained him to the bed.
“None of these projects fulfilled me in quite the same way running did,” he reports.
Fitzgerald learned to live with the daily challenge of an autoimmune disease that caused him to wake up feeling a thousand years old, every single day. He tried to get better, chasing the ever-elusive cure. Then, in 2023, he came to a different place emotionally.
“In my bones, where it really mattered, I no longer believed I would ever get better,” he writes. He calls that mental shift “thinking like a dying person” and describes it as “strangely liberating.”
“When it hit me that being healthy was not, in fact, a necessary condition for racing one more time—that I’d been lying to myself when I said I couldn’t run—I felt like a prison who’s just discovered his cell door has been unlocked the whole time.”
He walked out of prison and signed up for an audacious desert ultra called the Javelina Jundred. Not a 5K, not a half marathon: 100 kilometres through the Arizona desert. He swung for the fences, in other words.
Engrossed in the drama as I watched that baseball arc up into the sky, I read this book in a single day. It didn’t seem possible that a person with unresolved long COVID could tackle such an audacious physical and mental challenge and reach the finish line. But I rooted for him and his team of supporters every step of the way.
I love reading memoirs, and as a runner, I’ve read a lot of personal stories specific to my sport. This one stands out. Fitzgerald is a master storyteller with a meaningful story to tell. In this memoir, he confronts the big question everyone has to face at some point: Knowing we’re going to die, how do we choose to live?
This a gripping story, told with skill and the occasional glint of gallows humor. In these pages, we see a lifelong athlete coming to grips with mortality and finding the resources he needs to run “a race for closure.”
If you enjoy reading memoirs by athletes ...
If you have long COVID or myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome—or you love someone who does ...
If you’re a runner who gets inspired when you read another runner’s story about overcoming a barrier and achieving a goal ...
Then I predict “Dying to Run: An Athlete’s Quest for One More Finish” will be among your favorite books this year.
---
I bought an early copy of "Dying to Run" from the publisher because it sounded like "my kind of book," and it is. I have met Matt Fitzgerald on a few occasions, but this review is my own opinion, and I receive no reward for publishing it.
September 12, 2026
Listening to this book was like catching up with a close friend. Matt lays it all out - the good, the bad, even the stoics mocking him.
The journey he takes you on - the highs and the lows - is brutally honest. He bares his soul along the way in the manner one would only with someone they truly trust.
To me, self deprecation often feels disingenuous but sharing his foibles made the story more endearing.
This book also helped me better understand the frustration and feelings of hopelessness my friends with long COVID are dealing with.
The journey he takes you on - the highs and the lows - is brutally honest. He bares his soul along the way in the manner one would only with someone they truly trust.
To me, self deprecation often feels disingenuous but sharing his foibles made the story more endearing.
This book also helped me better understand the frustration and feelings of hopelessness my friends with long COVID are dealing with.
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews