Overcoming the Rating Game: Beyond Self-Love--Beyond Self-Esteem

by Paul Hauck

Feelings of inferiority are as universal as the common cold, and cause as many problems with health and happiness, says Paul Hauck. To help combat these negative feelings, he discourages individuals from rating themselves and encourages raising self-acceptance, improving skills, and gaining respect from others.

Genres: Self Help, Psychology, Nonfiction

116 pages, Kindle Edition

First published February 1, 1992

About the author

Dr. Paul A. Hauck was a renowned American psychologist and author, known for his long career in clinical practice and public education on mental health. After serving in World War II, he earned his Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and held key positions in several mental health centers before establishing the first private psychological practice in the Quad Cities. He wrote 16 popular psychology books, translated into 23 languages, and his long-running column The Human Scene educated readers for decades. Hauck was also an avid lifelong learner, enjoying music, languages, and sports. He was honored with the Illinois Most Distinguished Psychologist Award and retired in 2007.

Reviews

[Rodrigo Isunza · Rating 3 out of 5]

Clásico libro de auto superación. Con base en que el amor propio o el auto estima, solo son positivos si hacemos o logramos cosas positivas (en esencia me quiero o me aprecio) y si fracasamos o hacemos cosas negativas, pues no nos queremos o nos depreciamos. Introduce el concepto de la auto aceptación incondicional de manera tácita y tajante.
Me disgustó la forma en la que te lo hace ver, a través de verdades frías y con ejemplos fuertes. También se puede ver que en muchos ejemplos se queda corto de traer o convencer a sus pacientes de mejores alternativas o formas para aprender. Que al final es el objetivo de este libro, si estás fracasando estás aprendiendo

[Caro · Rating 3 out of 5]

Creo que es un libro donde se mencionan muchos conceptos al aire sin profundizar.

Aunque tiene sus 5-6 frases buenas como: "We get the behaviour we tolerate" o "If we are gente with ourselves and view ourselves as acceptable people who can forgive our errors and weakness, we can go thorough life in a condition of calmess and relative happiness"

[luminele285 · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.53/5

[Katie · Rating 1 out of 5]

Just awful. The writing is so outdated and sexist, it's absurd. Approximately half the sentences start with a prepositional phrase without a comma afterwards. The whole thing was just really distracting and frustrating. Instead of clearly explaining things, he often uses questions like "How could it not?" or "What else could it be?" to attempt to make a point. And he frequently describes whatever self-deprecating ailment a person might have so negatively, the whole book makes you feel like shit. "How sad to be someone who hates themselves!" or "If you're unhappy you'll soon be disturbed." Like. These are not okay phrases. Were they in the 80's?! My personal favorite (read: the part that made me ragingly mad with fury) part: When describing how people are more likely to do the shorter tasks on their to do lists than the items that take longer, he used the example of something like, It's easy for a woman to clean the dishes after dinner, but it's much harder for her to start spring cleaning because it takes weeks. So infuriatingly sexist, I almost threw the book out the window. But I didn't because a friend lent it to me. But no more! Don't waste your time on this. I need to find a way to build some self-confidence and be less harsh with myself, but this book did nothing for me except probably make things worse. Can I give it zero stars, or is 1 as low as it goes?

[Caroline · Rating 4 out of 5]

paul hauck is working under the premises of rational-emotive therapy, first developed by albert ellis and inspired by b.f. skinner. i think most of the teachings have to do with behavioral conditioning; that is, if you tell yourself something or act someway repeatedly, you will embody that feeling or action in your life. including things like irrational thoughts (i hate you, you are a failure, etc), judging, etc.

we are rational people, but at the same time, we have feelings and at many times, a lack of will power. this book sometimes fails to deal with these issues - so if you're very much an emotional person with a lack of rationality in your psyche, i would NOT recommend this book.

it definitely gave me a new perspective, though! so i would read it.... especially if you're interested in different types of therapy.

<3

[Chad Mayeux · Rating 5 out of 5]

Easy to read, structured, informative, helpful

The author was able to put philosophical and psychological jargon aside and create a desired, clear-to-understand, ability for the reader to follow along seamlessly.
I would recommend this book to anyone who struggles with issues of self-esteem (which, you will learn after reading, our beliefs of the term is incorrect), self-hate, and self-rating. The author also goes into some explanation and detail for those who have difficulty dealing with anger, jealousy and possessive behaviour.
Thank you, Dr. Hauck, for helping me through this book!

[Casie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved the straight forward dialogue the writer has with his audience. He gives a wide range of experiences and situations one might be in and how each can apply his methods to get from person with self-esteem issues to become a self-accepting, assertive and confident person from which to grow from.

[Deepak · Rating 4 out of 5]

A quick and helpful read.

[Harmun Singh · Rating 5 out of 5]

Its a life changer. There is no one thing that can fix a person, that can do all the work involved with recovery, but finishing this book was a very real and significant step in the right direction.