Ispod svega

by Traci Lords, Aleksandar Radosavljević (Translator)

Nora Kuzma was a troubled teenager from Steubenville, Ohio; Traci Lords was the underage skin mag/porn queen who became the centerpiece of the adult video industry's greatest scandal. In reality, they were one and the same, the subject of this slick, if thin autobiography. But what's striking here is not the familiar storyline--confused, sexually abused teen falls in with drugs and the wrong Southern California crowd, forges fake IDs to become Penthouse Pet of the Month at 16 and the '80s hottest adult star, then arrested as focus of the Reagan administration's crackdown on porn, only to become reborn as cleaned-up, psychoanalyzed/rehabed purveyor of legitimate film, TV, and music career. Rather, what's striking is Lords's capacity for denial, compartmentalization, and myopia when it serves her ends.

Her scandalous tenure in the skin trade--undeniably the sole basis for her infamy and subsequent legitimate career--is glossed over here in a few score pages, with more attention paid to the heavy-metal musicians that dotted her life than the motivations and machinations of the Feds who literally changed her life; Slash's snake gets more ink here than Attorney General Ed Meese. Quick to ladle generous sympathy on her own plight, she heaps little but scorn upon those from the seedy past of her porn-star alter-ego, yet seems to have had few qualms about formally adopting that moniker as her legal name. --Jerry McCulley

Genres: Nonfiction, Biography, Memoir, Autobiography, Sexuality, Biography Memoir, Erotica

313 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2003

About the author

Traci Lords (born Nora Louise Kuzma), also known as Traci Elizabeth Lords and Tracy Lords, is an American film actress, producer, film director, writer and singer. She first achieved notoriety for her underage appearances in pornographic films and Penthouse magazine (she was around 15 or 16 years-old in her first film), later becoming a television and B-movie actress.

In 2003 she published her autobiography, Traci Lords: Underneath It All.

Reviews

[Petra X · Rating 4 out of 5]

"My damage drove me into porn. I mean, I was a little girl. And I had like all of this stuff. I'd been raped. at 10, I'd been molested by my step-father. I'd been abused. I was messed up. And I was angry.

Now I've finished the book I have a lot of respect for Traci Lords. She was only in the porn industry for two years, having been led there by her mother's boyfriend, whom she thought of as a father figure. That old pervert molested her as she slept, or lay there frozen pretending to sleep. It was downhill through drugs and porn for the next two years.

No matter how many catalogues she modelled in, tv shows she appeared in, films she acted in, clubs she dj'ed in, records she made, or awards (she won best supporting actress twice) she could never get away without being asked about her porn past or having it used to create publicity. Porn defines her in the eyes of the world. It doesn't matter how pc society is about sex-workers, porn stars are still considered sleazy, whores but titillating ones.

She only made 20 films. All the many others used clips, outtakes and leftover film but not even IMDB can resist saying she made "somewhere between 80 and 100
Traci hasn't reconciled herself to the fact she cannot ever outlive those two terrible years no matter what she does, but to some extent she has come to terms with it. She once replied to a question about being in porn films with a cheery, "the only thing I ever learned was how to give a blow job without messing up my lipstick".

Notes on reading the book I'm enjoying reading this book, but I'm not enjoying the story. Traci, really Nora, was raped at 10 by her 16 year old 'boyfriend', ignored by her mostly-absent mother, left by her boyfriend of a year when she got pregnant, and put on the road to porn at 15 by her stepfather who had been abusing her for years at night as she pretended to sleep. (A friend had furnished her with a fake id. It is frighteningly easy in the US to get a fake id. How? Like this: All she did was take along a birth certificate to the DMV and get fingerprinted, photographed and blood-typed and there was her licence. She was 22 and not 15 any more! Anyone could borrow a birth certificate to do that. She had been instructed to say that she had stolen the birth certificate if she got found out

Porn star? Only in the eyes of others. Everyone, every single person from family to the FBI used and abused her. Then she got rescued by the lawyer Leslie Abramson, who saw not a porn star sitting in front of her but an 18 year old girl who had nowhere and no-one to turn to.

It's a really good book.

[Evan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Because of that horrible pornography, I ended up in Hollywood where I ultimately had a successful career in films, television, recording, DJ-ing, and publishing, and where I met the Prince Charming of my dreams.

Huh?

OK, so, yes, it's a moderately interesting woe-is-me tale of exploitation and adversity overcome, in which Lords never once stops to consider that maybe porn--illegal and wrong though it may have been, her being under 18 and all--led to her glass being half full rather than half empty, or to ponder what likely path her life would have taken had she not gained notoriety from porn.

Let me suggest what that likely alternative life scenario would have been. Lords would have run off from her trailer-trash existence, dysfunctional family and neglectful mom and dad--as she already had--and instead of hooking up with guys who exploited her neediness and naivete to lead her into porn she would have hooked up with some pimp or other exploiter or ended up with her dad back in Steubenville, Ohio, working as a cocktail waitress--not as the star of countless TV shows drinking Caymus Cabernet and living in a fancy beach mansion enjoying the scent of sea water and the caviar on the plate in front of her.

I mean, just sayin'....

In short, it's a quick, simple, entertaining read over mostly familiar showbiz territory, with plenty of sex, drugs and rock ' roll--or techno, anyway. John Waters, her first legit director, not surprisingly emerges in the book as a hero--but I could have told you that beforehand.

There are tons of nice glam shots in the book, but only one from the ages 10-17, which is not cricket, given the import of Lords' life during that period, particularly ages 15-17 when she was making the underage porn.

Not bad, but as the Scarlet Pimpernel said, "There is nothing so bad as something that's not so bad."

[Jen · Rating 4 out of 5]

How does one rate a book about the horrific childhood a person had? One star because what she went through was so terrible? Five stars because it ended up "okay"?

Four stars because it was well written and got the point across. I feel for her. Her life was a horror-show, but she didn't let it destroy her. She has real strength. It wasn't easy and she needed help, but between the help and her spirit, she overcame.

Though EVERY SINGLE person who abused her deserves a special spot in the afterworld. It makes me so mad that there are people out there like those who abused her. It burns me that she can't legally print the name of the "boyfriend" who forced himself on her. Since it wasn't proven in a court of law, his rights need to be protected. Just in case she's lying or something.

I highly doubt the poor woman is lying, but whatever. Protect the rapist, blame the victim. That just makes me so mad!

Sorry, supposed to be a review, not a rant. Great, if difficult read. Highly recommended.

[Naomi · Rating 2 out of 5]

I originally read this when I was a kid in high school, the same age as Traci when she started doing porn. We came from very similar backgrounds, so it's not as if I couldn't relate. But even then, as a teenager, I thought this was the whiniest autobiography I'd ever encountered. Fifteen years and hundreds of books later? Yeah, I still feel the same.

This is a shining example of how not to write, or how to be a completely unlikable narrator & person. How to refuse to take any personal responsibility for your actions, and lash out at anyone who judges you for being involved in something as wrong what she did. She somehow thinks herself an innocent victim for lying about her age & incriminating other people in the sex industry. On top of that, she can't understand why anyone would doubt her natural ability to be a serious actress, or why they would keep bringing up that porn - you know, the thing that got her foot in the door.

[linda sue · Rating 5 out of 5]

i LOVED this bio. i'm really into bios lately and i read this one in one entire nite. no shit. i sat down and read it in one shot. it sucked me into her life so much i couldn't put it down. even if you're not a porno fan you will enjoy this book. it's a book about salvation and overccoming obstacles. i love this woman.

[Jim Dooley · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is not a book that would have drawn my attention in most circumstances. My knowledge of Traci Lords prior to reading it was that she had been an underage pornography actress, she was the centerfold in the notorious Vanessa Williams issue of PENTHOUSE, and that she made an incredibly abysmal Roger Corman film, the remake of NOT OF THIS EARTH. However, finding all of the "Good" autobiography digital books checked out and needing something to fill the time, I gave it a try.

What I read was a very pleasant surprise. It was yet another reminder that we prejudge others at our own peril, and that there is great power in learning from the lives of others. The book is not an apology. It is a tutorial in how to survive trauma.

For those fans of the performer, they will be pleased to find that her writing style is "no holds barred" and laced with frequent profanity. For those who want an insider's view of how her most notorious films were made, the book will be a letdown. She offers a great deal of backstage gossip about her legitimate work, but no more than a cursory mention of the highlights of the flesh industry. (She is unable to hide her dislike for two performers, though!)

The revelation of her discovery of being underage occurs roughly halfway through the book, alerting the reader that there is much more to tell. And tell she does, in often riveting accounts about a world that is incapable of allowing her to move on...or are only interested in what she is able to do for them.

The story of the rebuilding of her life out of the wreckage is an inspiring one, and the generous inclusion of photographs allows us to see many of the main events and people. (Those looking for risqué delights will be disappointed as her pornography years receive no promotion.)

I had thought that she had disappeared from view, but the listing of her achievements shows that she is alive, well, and continuing to heal. It is a "raw" book in many ways, so it may offend the casual reader. For all others, the writer offers insights that would cause any rational person to question their morals when they give in to "harmless little vices."

[Giddy Girlie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this book in a thrift store and it appealed to both my interest in biographies and also my interest in crazy characters. I thought it was very well-written and concise and actually very conversational. I cannot say whether there was a ghost writer or a very strong editor involved, but in any case it makes the book very readable.

Traci Lords has been through a very rough life and she's very open about sharing her stories and her point of view. So many times throughout the book, I just wanted to put an arm around her and say "you don't have to do this" which seemed like what she was hoping to hear from ANY adult around her, unfortunately they all failed her.

I strongly disagree with some other reviews that say she gets "preachy" at the end of the book. What she SAYS is that she hopes that people can learn from her story as a "what-not-to-do" situation. She talks a bit about her dislike of pornography and the industry as a whole and that she wishes that porn actors/actresses weren't being accepted as part of the mainstream media as their porn personas (and YES she notes the irony that we only know who she is because of her porn scandal) because a lot of them are touting porn as feminism and empowerment and it may encourage young people to get into the industry and since she's STILL cited as the "porn princess" even 20+ years later, she is afraid that someone will hear her story (using a fake ID to pretend she was of legal age) and copy it. I don't think it's hypocritical and anyone who says that porn is empowering is crazy. Regardless of how someone FEELS during the physical act, the fact that you are being paid a very small amount of money to be recorded and you own no rights to your recordings and collect no royalties. What a porn actress may get paid $500 for will become THOUSANDS of movies and still photos and internet sites, etc. which make LOTS of money for somebody else. That isn't empowerment, that's exploitation. And yes, that's true for any sort of acting, but for film/TV actors there are contracts and bargaining rights, safety inspections, etc. that don't exist in the Adult Film industry (which is mainly filmed on digital cameras inside someone's house). A TV actor gets paid a living wage, a porn actor gets paid about 1/5 of his/her rent check.

[Shannon · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have to say I was surprised at how eloquent and well spoken Traci Lords is. I haven't read a TON of memoirs, but hers is by far the most intelligent, insightful, and poignant by far o all I have read. She is an extremely intelligent who has empowered herself through her surroundings. She has owned up to, and in so doing, has owned her life choices, as opposed to them owning her. I highly recommend this book. It's not a smut novel, so those looking for such need to look elsewhere. This is simply a story of a woman who found herself on a path that she didn't expect to be on, and made hard choices to switch paths, all the while not apologizing or making excuses for where she has been, what she has done, or who she was. Frankly, she wouldn't quite be the dynamic woman she is without her checkered past.

[Dann · Rating 2 out of 5]

Porn queen Traci Lords tells all in her autobiography Traci Lords: Underneath It All. As one would expect, it’s your typical story of neglect, sexual abuse, and drugs, followed by fame and fortune. Lords chronicles how she left her homeless mother and sisters as a teenager to live with one of her mother’s former boyfriends and got into “modeling,” which then led into porn. Attempting to mitigate her involvement in the porn industry, she downplays it as just a couple of shoots over several months, and justifies it as an attempt to gain some measure of control in her life (despite being high all the time). But the party came to an end when she was exposed as an underage performer and was forced to cooperate with the FBI in their investigations into the porn industry. Lords then took some acting lessons and transitioned into mainstream Hollywood, getting her big break in John Waters’ Cry-Baby and continuing on with a string of B-movies and stints on Married with Children, Melrose Place, and other ‘90s television shows. She also covers her two marriages and her foray into club music, with her critically acclaimed album 1,000 Fires. Unfortunately, the book is very poorly written, with a lot of internal thought commentary that’s unclear on whether it’s what she was thinking then or thinks now. And she constantly paints herself as the victim; of her parents, of the men in her life, of the porn industry, of the FBI, etc., etc. Still, it’s rather remarkable what she was able to accomplish (whether one sees it was ill-gotten by parleying her porn reputation for Hollywood fame or by hard work and force of will). Additionally, she puts forth a fairly positive and hopeful attitude, grateful for the opportunities that she’s been granted. Traci Lords: Underneath It All, if nothing else, reveals that there’s more to her than the controversy.

[Charles · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's very difficult to give a rating to such a book. One one hand, it's well written and provides quite a few details of someone who has led an interesting life, with the interesting meaning traumatic in many cases. It is a shame that she went through the types of abuse that she did, and she is obviously an intelligent person with a lot of internal drive. On the other hand, there were a lot of things in the story of her life that seemed inconsistent to me. So, it's difficult to judge whether we are dealing with an entirely reliable narrator or not. I am glad that things certainly improved for her and she was able to have the more mainstream life that she claimed throughout that she wanted.

[Vladimir · Rating 4 out of 5]

Давно уже периодически где-то натыкался на имя Трейси Лордс, видел несколько фильмов с ее участием, но не придавал значения какому-то особому вниманию к ее персоне, пока не почитал ее страничку на вики. Оказалось, что она раньше снималась в порке и стала участницей и, в общем-то, причиной одного из самых громких скандалов в истории порноиндустрии.

Книга отлично написана и очень легко читается, а английского хватит даже школьнику. Автобиография охватывает всю жизнь Трейси Лордс на момент написания: трудное детство, съемки в порно и нарозависимость в юности, психотерапия и расследование ФБР, карьера в кино и на ТВ, пение и диджейство на техносцене(!) и прочее. Душевная история жизненных трудностей и ошибок и последующие попытки искупления и исцеления. Впечатление, что написано, в целом, довольно честно. Помимо бодрости повествования, главное что подкупает при чтении - безудержная активность и целеустремленность героини, которая где только может пытается пробиться через закрытые для нее прошлым двери. И, надо сказать, добивается своего.

[Saruki Furakami · Rating 4 out of 5]

It’s hard to rate a memoir about someone’s traumas and triumphs, so I will limit my rating to the pacing and the storytelling. For the stories themselves, I have only awe!!

The first half is a five (immensely sad things, narrated with a lot of honesty and sincerity, and strong visual storytelling), and the second half is a three (it feels rushed and less personal and I wanted more introspection from Traci, who I can tell is a smart woman).

I will think about this one for a while, and perhaps I’ll come back and re-rate it a 5 because ultimately who am I lol.

[Nate · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had never heard of Traci Lords until I saw her on Oprah years ago, but there was something about her, and her life story that was really intriguing. I suppose a big part of it was wondering what type of childhood you must have to become a penthouse centerfold by the age of 16.

Not shockingly, it's an awful one; but her story presents more than just a never-ending series of horrific tragedies (although there is plenty of that). You get to know Traci and hear how she has dealt with and overcome her childhood while transitioning into an adult. Although I noticed myself thinking of her as she had appeared on Oprah, and I felt that added a dimension that complemented the book. So if it's possible, I'd recommend trying to find that interview before starting this one.

I noticed some of the other reviewers felt that she was whining or not taking responsibility for her actions. I didn't get that at all. Probably because the actions happened between the ages of 15-18, and it's unfair to hold a child to the same level of accountability as a full grown adult-especially given the circumstances and environment of her childhood (this poor girl did not have a chance).

So I liked her book and her honestly; and although the quality of writing left something to be desired, I appreciated that she wrote it herself rather than using a ghost writer.

[xTx xTx · Rating 4 out of 5]

i worked at a porn store when traci lords was in her hey day. i was exactly her same age. always wanted to learn about her full story. this gives it to us.

a quick and good read.

[David · Rating 4 out of 5]

In the 90's I saw this woman on a talk show and I was struck by an uncanny brave honesty in her. Traci Lords didn't present like a scandalized porn star fledging into Hollywood, exploiting her headlines under a mea-culpa posture; she exuded character, speaking with a quiet, seemingly hard-won confidence about the importance of human connections of authentic presence versus the Hollywood game of phoniness and hypocrisy. Then I caught an “A&E Biography” of her life, and her transformative story drew me to read her book. It’s an articulate account of her sad, preyed-upon youth and long struggle toward light. At 10, she was raped by a trusted friend, then molested by her mother’s boyfriend, who led her into porn when she was 15, after which followed years of vicious cycles of drugs, porn, bad people, public shame, and self-inflicted traps arising from her own psychological wreckage. She seemed doomed to a warped, wasted life — yet she slowly made her way, honed her path, healed, developed her mind, soul, and workcraft, and forged herself into a virtuous (in the secular Aristotelian sense), accomplished lady living a healthy, happy life. Heroism to me has always meant psychological heroism; it comes in lots of forms, and I see her life as an example.

[Amy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I had heard about the scandal in the media, Traci Lords, underage porn star, the princess of porn, but it hadn't occurred to me that she had entered the world of pornography unwillingly, a victim of sexual abuse, neglect. Being so young and naive, she was greedily exploited, a child of the night. It's no wonder she abused drugs and alcohol to numb the pain. I understood her need to defend herself after all these years with this tell all book, make peace with her past, put it behind her. I'm glad she found happiness and success as a serious actress and recording artist, an interesting book with many photos of Traci Lords.

[Mark Fleeman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Well written and hard to put down. As her life story moves on you see just how strong of a woman she truly is. A very inspirational book.

I gave it five stars because it was much more than what I thought it was going to be. Her story had a bit of everything from the horrors of growing up in a dysfunctional home to funny parts when working on her movie sets
Recommended for anyone who needs a feel good book because ultimately for me that's what it was. Clearly an underdog who comes back strong in the end.

[Amanda M. Lyons · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book because it was candid(granted that meant the writing wasn't always great)and it avoided making her porn career the focus of the book. I think that Lords was quite open with this book and enjoyed the section on her acting in Crybaby over many of the other parts. I have to say that I'm glad she could get things resolved after all she went through because she seems to be an enjoyable and intriguing person.

[Melodie · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm a sucker for these pop culture bios and was really looking forward to this one. I mean, come on, she was a porn star!! But it was pretty boring! I didn't find out anything really good here. Okay for passing some time.

[Lila Veen · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some people have something that makes them interesting. Traci Lords has an obvious one: an underage porn career. Since this book doesn't focus so much on that but rather her struggle to break away from that side of her past, this book wasn't very interesting.

[Viktor · Rating 3 out of 5]

I admire her later charity work. I also like how she has moved on. However, I have a hard time believing that she remembers nothing of her pre-18 porn career. She claims she was too stoned to know. Too many people who were there say otherwise.

[Lisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

No idea why I read this... I guess I picked it up at the library one day and got engrossed. I became interested in her side of the story, since she is always demonized in the porn industry.

[CharlieღNikki · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book in one sitting. Really liked it!

[Kristin Myrtle · Rating 4 out of 5]

A surprisingly well written biography. Lords is one smart girl.

[Mediaman · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is better than you'd expect from a criminal sex worker-turned-legit actress. I didn't really know much about her and was surprised to discover that all of her porn work occurred when she was under 18 years old. That, of course, brought charges against those who employed her, but she lied and had a fake idea, knowing exactly what she was doing since she was 15. She got away with it and blame-shifts to horrible men she feels disgust for, all the while flirting and seducing her way to earning more money.

The author goes through three names before settling on Traci Lords and makes it her legal name as an adult, then blame-shifts all of her problems on the guys in her life, starting with her father. But as a teen she made bad choices that she was never really held accountable for. It baffles me that if she were caught at that age stealing or kidnapping or killing she would have been in jail and put on trail; for shooting dozens of porn films before she's 18 she gets no blame and the adults are held responsible for something she deceived them on. Why does society hold teenagers accountable for their actions for everything except sex? Lords was the manipulator and abuser, not the adults that trusted the fake identity she showed them. It's hard to feel empathy for someone willing to almost kill herself on drugs before she even finishes high school.

On the other hand, some adults are to blame for laying the groundwork to give pre-18 Lords the bad choices to make in the first place. Her parents. An adult female neighbor that she babysat for who helped her get the fake ID. The creepy guys in the porn business who pushed her to go farther than she claims she was comfortable with. Even her "boyfriends" that used her for their own gain.

She's a whiny temptress that uses her body to make money and score drugs (LOTS of drugs at a teen), then complains that men are leering at her and want to have sex! Huh? She wants to provoke a reaction, then gets upset when she does. That's mental illness, something she doesn't really address here beyond a few rounds of adult therapy to straighten out the warped childhood that she ran away from. The craziest thing is that her mother did report her missing to police, and for three years the FBI kept tabs on her underage porn work but never stepped in to rescue her until after she turned 18.

The good news is that despite all of her blame-shifting, after the FBI took her in she admits "I blamed myself for everything," but then adds, "it took me years in therapy before I finally began to see that I wasn't the only one who was guilty of abusing me."

In the middle of trying to survive adulthood she claims to have gotten baptized, not because she was sorry for her sins and wanted a new life but because of her first wedding. It's too bad because her life was obviously in need of salvation and a belief in God that could carry her through the tough times, but she never addresses any type of faith.

The writing of the book is serviceable. Her best section is when she shot a movie for John Waters in Baltimore and met her first husband. However, there are large portions of her life she completely skips past, including some of her TV and film work, and the ending is a rush of her last 15 years in just a few pages. She even skips over husband number two, which I found out when I looked her up online, and goes straight from #1 to #3 in the book. How can we trust the rest of her story if she isn't going to tell us all of the important details? The actress/model is still hiding some things underneath it all.

[Stahlgewitter · Rating 4 out of 5]

I expected a sob story about how she was a helpless victim at the hands of a ruthless industry. Got none of it.

The book does start off by paying dues to the obligatory Marxist religion of the day by taking a potshot at men and equating being a housewife to a slave - as ridiculous as they at may sound. However, nowadays, few books get published without at least a small, requisite piece of propaganda. Thankfully, the poison quickly fades and we get to hear her story.

Traci Lords will forever be misunderstood and unfairly judged by a mistake she made over three decades ago. Many people in her place would’ve self-destructed and died. Quickly.

Everything she has, she’s earned against all odds and of her one determination and hard work.

The book drags a little for me past the midway point, as it turns into a running record of successive projects. But what keeps it interesting is the glimpse into the world of showbiz by an insistent outsider and the hope you carry as a reader that Traci will finally one day be complete again as a person.

On a personal note, I was a little disappointed she made no mention of Shock ‘Em Dead, a low budget heavy metal movie that treats the Faust story with true creativity and heart despite its horrid budget. Too obscure except for dedicated b-movie fans, I guess.

[Ashley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Traci Lords has been a part of my life and someone I have looked up to since I was about 4 years old. I remember practicing in the mirror, trying to get my “beat it creep!” just like hers. I still to this day mime the Wanda wiggle when talking about hitch hiking. She was a part of watching Tommyknockers with my dad, which he loved. I cannot bring myself to skip Control or Fallen Angel when those songs get shuffled to and ever since I was a teenager, she was always my answer to “if you could meet ANYONE, who would it be?” I am so glad I did not meet her before I read this book.

I somehow didn’t even know this book existed until a few days ago and it was jarring to learn of her beginnings and early years. I’ve been mistaken for years in thinking that she was this genius femme fatale of the porn industry. Becoming rich and famous and then BAM! Now it’s all illegal and behind her and she got to start a new career and a fresh start! I was super naive thinking that way. Of course it can’t be that cut and dry. She really overcame a lot of shit and did what she wanted and forced a name for herself, outside of porn. She’s still a real bad ass lady but in much different ways than I had thought and I respect her even more than I already did. I absolutely loved reading this book and getting a peek at the real her.

[Matt · Rating 3 out of 5]

Porn was a power trip for me. At the time I didn't understand it, but in reality I was fighting to take back what had been robbed from me as a child. There was a war going on in my heart and I was acting it out with my limbs. I was a sex-crazed, drugged-out wild child and I wreaked havoc on everyone I came across.

What Traci Lords' autobiography might lack in writing style it makes up with Lords' undoubtedly shocking story and unique perspective on the porn industry. While the text might be a bit clunky or flat at points, Lords does have quite a lot of charm that makes her escape from trouble and abuse at a young age into a more and more flourishing adult very endearing to follow. Knowing that she grew into a happy and healthy woman also makes the awful early years of her life, which seemed to brandish her entire existence for a while, so much easier to bear.
Growing up as the poster child celebrity survivor of one of the ugliest crimes is a strange concept and I appreciate that she chose to share her point-of-view like this, with full confidence and self-reflection.

While this isn't the best-written (auto)biography I've read, it is definitely a very solid one, written by an interesting person with something to say.

[Wendi · Rating 3 out of 5]

It took me longer to read this book than it should have. While I admire Traci Lords and respect the person she is, her writing style isn't really my thing. I found it mundane and elementary at times. The constant barrage of "what ifs" were annoying. I had to put the book down several times and come back to it later, because I was bored with it.

That being said Ms. Lords has certainly had an incredible, and at times, terrifying life. Anyone who would look down on her for her early stint in porn, is ridiculous. She was a child doing what she needed to survive. If you can't relate to that, consider yourself lucky.

If you are looking for a salacious retelling of her porn days, with blow by blow action... don't read this book. Ms. Lords handles this chapter in her life with dignity, being sure to leave out the dirty details.

If you are interested in her struggles to leave her porn princess moniker behind, then I recommend Underneath it All. Just be wary of what I said above. She goes through several of her acting/music gigs, and gives some insight to her relationship issues.

Overall Underneath it All is the story of triumph and self-acceptance.

[Kristen Everetts · Rating 5 out of 5]

I saw a couple of nasty reviews on this and immediately decided to read it. I don’t judge a book based solely off of their 5 star reviews, but instead off of the bad ones.

This book pulled at my soul. She has been through so much in her life, but she kept hope. She survived years in a complete “fight or flight” state of mind, and is incredibly resilient.

I’m not going to lie, I grew up only knowing her due to her notoriety from her porn career, her PERFECT role in Cry Baby, and of course the unforgettable role of “Bubbles” from Zack and Miri. I never imagined what she went through or what kind of person she really is or was.

I will say though that I’m so happy that she found her happy ending and I’ll forever be rooting for her.