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Whenever You Touch Dead Things, You Must Always Wash Your Hands.
56 pages, Kindle Edition
Published March 18, 2026
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
April 7, 2026
A decent , bloody revenge story full of spite and nastiness about a young girl who is getting bullied and physically abused both at home and at school.
A little predictable and very like lots of short tales of this type which was a bit of a shame as I was hoping for something a little more deep and meaningful.
However, I really liked the idea that the action was written after her own experiences growing up with her father.
Right, off now to do some 'online shopping'.
Rating: 3.5 stars (rounded down due to the obvious predictability woven into the narrative)
March 22, 2026
I recieved this book for an honest review, I believe the book released yesterday!
This is the story of Beth, Beth has a shitty life. She has an absolute piece of shit father, a school life that is full of torment and absolutely no form of escape. Beth finally realises her shit cup runneth over and now others need to pay.
Great story with a great protagonist. lots of blood and gore, really good read!
This is the story of Beth, Beth has a shitty life. She has an absolute piece of shit father, a school life that is full of torment and absolutely no form of escape. Beth finally realises her shit cup runneth over and now others need to pay.
Great story with a great protagonist. lots of blood and gore, really good read!
April 25, 2026
Easily could have read another 100 pages about Beth and her journey. Brilliant splatterpunk 👌🏻
May 8, 2026
Oh Wow...What a bloody rollercoaster of a brutal and gory read...it made me sweat and it made me scream.
I could have just kept on reading about Beth and her sad shitty life with her abusive father and bullying school "friends".
Her eating and drinking habits were sickening and vile...and she certainly didn't believe in using sanitary products!!!
She wanted to taste and savour the "Red Stuff" and nothing was gonna stop her from getting it!!
This was an intriguing and interesting revenge story...well written and packed into a short read.
Bravo... Lula Von Goth...I loved this and didn't want it to end.
The ending left me completely craving more of Beth and her wicked ways.
5🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟's Now I've got to go and wash not only my hands but my whole damn body and mind.
I could have just kept on reading about Beth and her sad shitty life with her abusive father and bullying school "friends".
Her eating and drinking habits were sickening and vile...and she certainly didn't believe in using sanitary products!!!
She wanted to taste and savour the "Red Stuff" and nothing was gonna stop her from getting it!!
This was an intriguing and interesting revenge story...well written and packed into a short read.
Bravo... Lula Von Goth...I loved this and didn't want it to end.
The ending left me completely craving more of Beth and her wicked ways.
5🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟's Now I've got to go and wash not only my hands but my whole damn body and mind.
April 10, 2026
Holy shit what a rollercoaster! I love the female rage of the mc!!
Finished in one sitting and it was an incredible read!! Loved it all the way through! Character development on mc was brilliant!!
If you like female rage/revenge you should definitely check this out. Will always recommend!!
Great plot!!
Finished in one sitting and it was an incredible read!! Loved it all the way through! Character development on mc was brilliant!!
If you like female rage/revenge you should definitely check this out. Will always recommend!!
Great plot!!
March 22, 2026
Another short story masterpiece. I just love how she took revenge in this. Soooo amazing
March 24, 2026
What a hell of a title: Whenever You Touch Dead Things, You Must Always Wash Your Hands! Written by the amazing Lula Von Goth. She has done it again. Another deliciously gory book to tickle your extreme horror fancy! And this cover! LOVE!
This story follows Beth, who had a traumatic upbringing with the murder of her mom and horrible abuse at the hands of her drunk dad. Her only way to cope is to numb herself to everything around her. As she gets older, the abuse spills over to school - that's when she finally snaps.
This story is under 60 pages, but it is packed with everything I love! I love a female lead that snaps and goes after what she wants, be it revenge or revenge with a large helping of blood! I will read anything that Lula publishes.
Thanks to Lula Von Goth for gifting me an eARC of Whenever You Touch Dead Things, You Must Always Wash Your Hands. I am leaving this review voluntarily. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
This story follows Beth, who had a traumatic upbringing with the murder of her mom and horrible abuse at the hands of her drunk dad. Her only way to cope is to numb herself to everything around her. As she gets older, the abuse spills over to school - that's when she finally snaps.
This story is under 60 pages, but it is packed with everything I love! I love a female lead that snaps and goes after what she wants, be it revenge or revenge with a large helping of blood! I will read anything that Lula publishes.
Thanks to Lula Von Goth for gifting me an eARC of Whenever You Touch Dead Things, You Must Always Wash Your Hands. I am leaving this review voluntarily. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
April 16, 2026
Lula Von Goth does it again & somehow pushes things even further.
I always enjoy her writing & she has a real talent for packing in as much gore as possible without it ever feeling pointless. This one is relentless in the best way. It’s graphic, uncomfortable, & at times genuinely hard to stomach, but that’s exactly what makes it so effective.
I read this in one sitting because once it gets its hooks into you, there’s no putting it down. No matter how brutal it gets, you need to know what happens next.
At its core, this is a savage, deeply unsettling story of abuse, trauma, & revenge. What stood out to me, & what I’ve seen others say too, is how Lula balances the shock factor with something more meaningful underneath. There’s anger here, pain, & a sense of justice that’s as disturbing as it is satisfying.
If you like your horror dark, raw, & completely uncompromising, this one delivers.
I always enjoy her writing & she has a real talent for packing in as much gore as possible without it ever feeling pointless. This one is relentless in the best way. It’s graphic, uncomfortable, & at times genuinely hard to stomach, but that’s exactly what makes it so effective.
I read this in one sitting because once it gets its hooks into you, there’s no putting it down. No matter how brutal it gets, you need to know what happens next.
At its core, this is a savage, deeply unsettling story of abuse, trauma, & revenge. What stood out to me, & what I’ve seen others say too, is how Lula balances the shock factor with something more meaningful underneath. There’s anger here, pain, & a sense of justice that’s as disturbing as it is satisfying.
If you like your horror dark, raw, & completely uncompromising, this one delivers.
April 17, 2026
Grim and dark!
It still amazes me how much this author can pack into so few pages, and this is something that should no longer amaze me at all. In her latest work, Lula Von Goth has created a character who is wretched and cold, forlorn and brutal. A bullied and abused young woman whose pain and suffering you immediately feel even while you’re horrified, even repulsed at the extent of her revenge when she finally reaches the point in which enough is enough. This author cleverly draws you into this world of desolation and brutality and propels you relentlessly to the chilling ending. The last glimpse you get inside the head of Beth will leave you with a deep feeling of dread for the next unfortunate to cross her bloody path. A story that is unapologetic in both its content and delivery. Highly recommended…but do tread carefully with this one.
It still amazes me how much this author can pack into so few pages, and this is something that should no longer amaze me at all. In her latest work, Lula Von Goth has created a character who is wretched and cold, forlorn and brutal. A bullied and abused young woman whose pain and suffering you immediately feel even while you’re horrified, even repulsed at the extent of her revenge when she finally reaches the point in which enough is enough. This author cleverly draws you into this world of desolation and brutality and propels you relentlessly to the chilling ending. The last glimpse you get inside the head of Beth will leave you with a deep feeling of dread for the next unfortunate to cross her bloody path. A story that is unapologetic in both its content and delivery. Highly recommended…but do tread carefully with this one.
March 22, 2026
They say hurt people hurt people, and this adage comes true for Beth as she tries to navigate growing up with an abusive parent and as a victim of bullying. Beth finds comfort where she can, which will only lead to a downward spiral, but for who? With Lulas matter-of-fact writing style, this story strip away all the fluff and gets right to the heart of the matter- how much can one person take?
April 1, 2026
A life of abuse and neglect can break even the strongest person. Beth was no different. She tried to pretend life was normal, she tried to survive. But everyone has their limits, and Beth found hers. Sanity has slipped, and those that wronged her will pay for their mistakes. This is heartbreaking, violent, and a wee bit gross, and I absolutely loved it
March 28, 2026
I would have loved for this book to be longer with more development, however for such a mini, it packed a punch.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews