*Could be considered spoilery.
When you’re trying to mend a broken heart, who do you turn to? A good friend.
And in Jules’s case, she turns to Theo, a childhood pal who offers her a comforting hug, an understanding ear, and a place to lick her wounds while he licks her.
Wait. What? That doesn’t sound right. Let’s try that again.
Jules turns to Theo, a childhood friend who offers her a place where she can take a relaxing hot shower, eat a delicious meal, and find succor while he sucks her.
Wait. What? That sounds all kinds of wrong. Doubly wrong. But in Mistress Weena’s Math Class for the Sick and Twisted, two negatives definitely make a positive, so let’s jes’ keep it moving, folks.
Jules turns to Theo who in turn bends her over a desk…what? Are you still worried about Jules? Does she LOOK like she’s complaining?
And, really, the desk is very nice for being located in Theo’s sex club.
What? Did I forget to mention he’s part owner of a sex club? A sex club that he’s just given Jules a 30-day free pass to?
Good Lord, where are my book review manners! I probably left them on that really nice desk, and now they’re all wet and sticky.
Ennyway, Jules’s ex-boyfriend has pummeled her self-esteem to about the size of his teeny peeny, so she broke up with him, fleeing to Theo’s for 30 days to heal her spirit, little knowing that part of her cure will include getting to touch some hot anonymous naked guy (Spirituality is fuckin’ fun!). While he’s tied to a chair (Spirituality haz ropes? Who knew!). Anywhere she wants (Spirituality WANTS me to touch that wang! Really. It told me so. I never lie about wang, man).
Yes, Theo owns a sex club, and he knows that Jules just needs to get her womanly power back and can do so by being in charge of her sexual experiences, kinda like being a CEO and running her inner Board of Directors meeting, only with fewer boring agenda items and a shit-ton more clitoris involved.
So, yeah, naked guy happens, and then the desk happens, and then CHOCOLATE FUDGE CAKE HAPPENS, and did I just die and go to heaven?!
Not yet I haven’t because we haven’t even gotten to the part where Theo is master-debating in front of Jules WHILE SHE EATS CHOCOLATE FUDGE CAKE…and BABOOMBABYI’MFOOKINDEAD. Dead. Dead, I tell ya.
But not really because there’s more peen and shopping and meaningful conversations and getting close to each other and menage sex with John, Theo’s fookin’ hot Aussie lover…
What? Did I forgot to mention that Theo’s bi? WTF?! IT MUST BE ALL THE GAT DAMN CHOCOLATE FUDGE CAKE.
Forgive me. On second thought, don’t waste time forgiving me. Spend those precious seconds downloading O’Reilly’s quick and durrty, durrty lil’ novella. For the cake. Because, really, who cares about dick when there’s cake to be had?
Okay, there’s cake AND a happy ending, so BONUS.
This one will leave you satisfied, satiated, and spiritual (ohhhh, yeah—naked-anonymous-guy-tied-to-a-chair spiritual, might I remind you). Say three Hail Marys and hit that download button now.