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Mark Manson on Self-Knowledge
The Greeks are said to have inscribed “Know Thyself” on their ancient temples, inviting their people to take a moment and question their motivations and their actions on occasion.
The pursuit of self-knowledge is at the heart of most religions and philosophical pursuits across the world. It seems that an unfortunate side effect of the brain’s marvellous ability to question everything is the brain’s ability to question itself.
“Who am I? Why do I do the things I do? Can I change?”
These are questions that inevitably plague us all in one form or another. And while I don’t believe there’s ever a permanent answer to any of them, we can become better at investigating ourselves.
(That sounded kind of dirty.)
It turns out that psychology has uncovered numerous ways in which our beliefs about ourselves affect not only our behaviours ut our successes in this world. People who believe they are smarter actually do better on tests, even though they aren’t smarter and haven’t studied any more than the average student. People who believe they are given an energy drink are able to lift more weight than normal, even though the drink they were given contained nothing special. People who believe they need less sleep actually do perform better under less sleep than those who do not.
Beliefs are powerful. And because they are powerful, we must learn to train our mind to observe them and question them.
This short ebook contains three ideas that are designed to help you do that:
1. Your Two Minds
2. Believe What’s Helpful, Not What’s True
3. The Prime Belief
Hopefully, by the end, you will find yourself much more
comfortable questioning yourself and opening to new ideas
you had never considered before.
Enjoy.
The pursuit of self-knowledge is at the heart of most religions and philosophical pursuits across the world. It seems that an unfortunate side effect of the brain’s marvellous ability to question everything is the brain’s ability to question itself.
“Who am I? Why do I do the things I do? Can I change?”
These are questions that inevitably plague us all in one form or another. And while I don’t believe there’s ever a permanent answer to any of them, we can become better at investigating ourselves.
(That sounded kind of dirty.)
It turns out that psychology has uncovered numerous ways in which our beliefs about ourselves affect not only our behaviours ut our successes in this world. People who believe they are smarter actually do better on tests, even though they aren’t smarter and haven’t studied any more than the average student. People who believe they are given an energy drink are able to lift more weight than normal, even though the drink they were given contained nothing special. People who believe they need less sleep actually do perform better under less sleep than those who do not.
Beliefs are powerful. And because they are powerful, we must learn to train our mind to observe them and question them.
This short ebook contains three ideas that are designed to help you do that:
1. Your Two Minds
2. Believe What’s Helpful, Not What’s True
3. The Prime Belief
Hopefully, by the end, you will find yourself much more
comfortable questioning yourself and opening to new ideas
you had never considered before.
Enjoy.
24 pages, ebook
First published January 1, 2018
About the author
Mark Manson
91 books18.9k followersMark Manson (born 1984) is a professional blogger, entrepreneur, and former dating coach. Since 2007, he's been helping people with their emotional and relationship problems. He has worked with thousands of people from over 30 different countries.
He regularly writes and updates his blog at: www.markmanson.net
He regularly writes and updates his blog at: www.markmanson.net
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 42 reviews
November 6, 2015
This short ebook is a compilation of three long articles. But, since it's free to download for anyone, I won't complain about that at all (as I did about other books which you had to pay for, but still offered nothing that was not findable on the author's site).
The first article is about emotions and how to handle them. It introduced a totally new idea to me, about the thinking mind and the observing mind and defusing them. If you sometimes have troubles with emotions (and who doesn't!), this will prove really helpful, I think.
The second article is titled: belief what's helpful, not what's true. I do not agree with the overall relativistic message of the article. I do not think Hitler was right in keeping false beliefs about Jews because they were helpful to him, bringing and keeping him in power in Nazi-Germany. However, I think it's still important that Manson points out that beliefs are choices, and I agree that you should belief what's helpful in more subjective areas, such as your appearance.
The third article is about taking total responsibility. Although I already knew about this idea, and I've been applying it ever since I read about it (on Steve Pavlina's blog), I think this idea cannot be emphasized enough.
The first article is about emotions and how to handle them. It introduced a totally new idea to me, about the thinking mind and the observing mind and defusing them. If you sometimes have troubles with emotions (and who doesn't!), this will prove really helpful, I think.
The second article is titled: belief what's helpful, not what's true. I do not agree with the overall relativistic message of the article. I do not think Hitler was right in keeping false beliefs about Jews because they were helpful to him, bringing and keeping him in power in Nazi-Germany. However, I think it's still important that Manson points out that beliefs are choices, and I agree that you should belief what's helpful in more subjective areas, such as your appearance.
The third article is about taking total responsibility. Although I already knew about this idea, and I've been applying it ever since I read about it (on Steve Pavlina's blog), I think this idea cannot be emphasized enough.
January 3, 2022
The author of Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, transits 3 clear ideas in this short book without any subtleness:
#1. We all have Two minds:
-The thinking brain & Observing Brain (this concept is taken from Buddhism as well as ALT: acceptance & commitment therapy )
-We shouldn't diffuse ourselves with negative emotions when they arise (Better to say I feel anger than saying I was angry.)
-Emotions aren't a choice, Behavior is.
-Emotions are temporary. They aren't anyone's fault, they just are.
#2 Believe not what's true but what is helpful:
-Confirmation bias a human need to only notice & observe phenomena that support our prior beliefs.
-Truth is up for endless debate in most circumstances. So why not debate on a side that helps you?
#3 The Prime Belief :
-You are responsible for everything you do in your life, no matter external circumstances. (The idea was taken from William James, Father of American Psychology, Book "Will to Believe")
-Simple choice to take responsibility for ourselves and our values allows us to feel in control of everything that happens to us.
#1. We all have Two minds:
-The thinking brain & Observing Brain (this concept is taken from Buddhism as well as ALT: acceptance & commitment therapy )
-We shouldn't diffuse ourselves with negative emotions when they arise (Better to say I feel anger than saying I was angry.)
-Emotions aren't a choice, Behavior is.
-Emotions are temporary. They aren't anyone's fault, they just are.
#2 Believe not what's true but what is helpful:
-Confirmation bias a human need to only notice & observe phenomena that support our prior beliefs.
-Truth is up for endless debate in most circumstances. So why not debate on a side that helps you?
#3 The Prime Belief :
-You are responsible for everything you do in your life, no matter external circumstances. (The idea was taken from William James, Father of American Psychology, Book "Will to Believe")
-Simple choice to take responsibility for ourselves and our values allows us to feel in control of everything that happens to us.
April 5, 2018
It is not exactly a book but 3 articles put together.
If you feel that you have a good knowledge of Zen, then this book wouldn't provide much value. But other than that it is a good read.
Summary
Part1: The two minds:
You have 2 minds the thinking mind & the observing mind. You can not control the thinking mind, it will think & feel various things, good and bad. It is what you do with the observing mind that makes you live the consequences of the thinking mind.
Part2: Believe not what's true but what's helpful:
You have the option to believe the glass is half full or half empty. If what you believe is harming you in anyway you have the option to change what you believe. If you believe you are ugly you will act in such a way and make it's results come true, if you believe you are beautiful you will act in such a way and make it's results true.
Part3: The prime belief
What ever happens to you, you are the reason it happened. This is about taking responsibility of not what you do but also what is happening to you as well.
If you feel that you have a good knowledge of Zen, then this book wouldn't provide much value. But other than that it is a good read.
Summary
Part1: The two minds:
You have 2 minds the thinking mind & the observing mind. You can not control the thinking mind, it will think & feel various things, good and bad. It is what you do with the observing mind that makes you live the consequences of the thinking mind.
Part2: Believe not what's true but what's helpful:
You have the option to believe the glass is half full or half empty. If what you believe is harming you in anyway you have the option to change what you believe. If you believe you are ugly you will act in such a way and make it's results come true, if you believe you are beautiful you will act in such a way and make it's results true.
Part3: The prime belief
What ever happens to you, you are the reason it happened. This is about taking responsibility of not what you do but also what is happening to you as well.
October 22, 2020
كتيب صغير ومفيد، أنصح بقراءته. أحب كتابات مارك مانسون بالمجمل وهو أفضل من قرأت له في مجال تعليم الناس كيفية التعاطي النفسي مع المشاكل الحياتية اليومية. يعطي مارك مانسون في هذا الكتيب للقارئ طرقا تمكنه من التعامل مع ضغوطات الحياة أو الصعوبات التي يواجهها بدون أن يستسلم تماما كي لا يصل لدرجة من الإحباط والعجز تجعله يتوقف عن فعل كل شيء.
يستطيع أي إنسان من خلال فهم الآلية التي يتعامل بها الدماغ مع ضغوطات الحياة أن يقوم بإحداث تغييرات واعية تعاكس أفكاره اللاواعية السلبية وبذلك تساعده على تجاوز الصعوبات بسرعة أكبر وعلى عدم الوقوع بفخ الاستسلام أو العجز التام الذي يوقفه عن أن يؤدي في حياته بشكل طبيعي لدى وقوع المشاكل أو الصعوبات.
يستطيع أي إنسان من خلال فهم الآلية التي يتعامل بها الدماغ مع ضغوطات الحياة أن يقوم بإحداث تغييرات واعية تعاكس أفكاره اللاواعية السلبية وبذلك تساعده على تجاوز الصعوبات بسرعة أكبر وعلى عدم الوقوع بفخ الاستسلام أو العجز التام الذي يوقفه عن أن يؤدي في حياته بشكل طبيعي لدى وقوع المشاكل أو الصعوبات.
April 4, 2019
I'm blown away by Manson's ability to convey in a readable, understandable style how to deal with my often unhelpful thoughts and emotions. He is not a trained therapist, but he employs many scientific and ancient techniques to apply to one's daily life in the hopes of, gradually, re-training the mind to its healthiest self.
November 28, 2019
“I deal with fear and worry by dealing with fear and worry.”-Mark.M. This has got to be my favourite quote from this short read. 3 short articles put together that clearly conveyed his messages on how to make peace with your own negative self thoughts. Do take 30 mins off your day and read this. You won’t regret.
August 7, 2018
"Emotions are not a choice. Behavior is."
December 15, 2019
Short, sweet, and to the point. It really IS how you interpret what life throws at you and How you choose to react that determines how you feel.
June 2, 2023
As someone who read The Subtle Art and Everything is F’ed I was expecting Mark Manson to use his informal writing and storytelling techniques to portray some image into your mind. Yet, this short ebook is more of a guide towards finding discipline with a combination of Mark’s unique (humorous) diction.
the ebook is broken down into three ideas.
idea # 1 - *Detach yourself from emotions.* Mark introduces a concept that we all have two minds, an Observing Mind and Thinking Mind, and separating these can help you deal with your emotions in a better way.
Fav quote from part one: “As soon as you try to eliminate a thought or emotion, you make it stronger. The more you focus on an emotion, the more powerful it becomes”.
idea # 2 - *Believe Not What’s True, But What’s Helpful*. In this second part of the ebook Mark tries to connect with the audience. If you read the Subtle Art, you will recognize these methods that he uses to get to the readers, a trait that is quite admirable. In this part Mark hints that we never really know what is actually true. This reminds me of a class I took in school where my professor said “the T in truth should never be capitalized”, meaning that most of the things we learn are based on events or occurrences that have happened in the past, so technically there is no way of us knowing if they’re really ‘true’. Anyways, point of this part is that Mark wants us to realize that we can believe whatever we want, and that everything can be up for debate. With that being said, he encourages the readers to pick ideals or beliefs that can help you.
Fav quote from part two: “Because it doesn’t matter what’s true or what’s not. The truth is up for
endless debate in most circumstances. So why not debate on the side that helps you?”
idea # 3 - *The Prime Belief.* In this third and final part, Mark uses William James’, famous American philosopher, story as a segway to his idea of ‘its not about what happens to you, its about how you react’. Personally, this was my favorite part of the ebook. Big ‘F it, we ball’ moment.
Fav quote from part three: “Yes, these experiences still hurt like a motherf’er. But negative
experiences are part of life. The question is not whether or not we have them
but what we do with them”.
the ebook is broken down into three ideas.
idea # 1 - *Detach yourself from emotions.* Mark introduces a concept that we all have two minds, an Observing Mind and Thinking Mind, and separating these can help you deal with your emotions in a better way.
Fav quote from part one: “As soon as you try to eliminate a thought or emotion, you make it stronger. The more you focus on an emotion, the more powerful it becomes”.
idea # 2 - *Believe Not What’s True, But What’s Helpful*. In this second part of the ebook Mark tries to connect with the audience. If you read the Subtle Art, you will recognize these methods that he uses to get to the readers, a trait that is quite admirable. In this part Mark hints that we never really know what is actually true. This reminds me of a class I took in school where my professor said “the T in truth should never be capitalized”, meaning that most of the things we learn are based on events or occurrences that have happened in the past, so technically there is no way of us knowing if they’re really ‘true’. Anyways, point of this part is that Mark wants us to realize that we can believe whatever we want, and that everything can be up for debate. With that being said, he encourages the readers to pick ideals or beliefs that can help you.
Fav quote from part two: “Because it doesn’t matter what’s true or what’s not. The truth is up for
endless debate in most circumstances. So why not debate on the side that helps you?”
idea # 3 - *The Prime Belief.* In this third and final part, Mark uses William James’, famous American philosopher, story as a segway to his idea of ‘its not about what happens to you, its about how you react’. Personally, this was my favorite part of the ebook. Big ‘F it, we ball’ moment.
Fav quote from part three: “Yes, these experiences still hurt like a motherf’er. But negative
experiences are part of life. The question is not whether or not we have them
but what we do with them”.
February 5, 2023
Mark Manson is one of my favorite self help book author, his actually the only one. His like that uncle who shares life lessons with you but curses a lot too.
What I liked about this tiny little book is the fact that its.. well so damn tiny unlike other self help books that stretch a point more than Mr Fantastic him self. This one is straight to the point no bullshit. You can finish it in just one sitting but I advice against that, hear me out. Even though its 24 pages its split into 3 main ideas.
IDEA #1: THE TWO MINDS (the thinking mind and the observant mind)
IDEA #2: BELIEVE NOT WHAT'S TRUE, BUT WHAT'S HELPFUL
IDEA #3: THE PRIME BELIEF
I suggest taking time to really soak in these 3 points. They're not revolutionary nor life changing yes that is true but they force you to pause and have little moments of introspection.
What I liked about this tiny little book is the fact that its.. well so damn tiny unlike other self help books that stretch a point more than Mr Fantastic him self. This one is straight to the point no bullshit. You can finish it in just one sitting but I advice against that, hear me out. Even though its 24 pages its split into 3 main ideas.
IDEA #1: THE TWO MINDS (the thinking mind and the observant mind)
"Most of our psychological and emotional stress happens because our Thinking Mind and Observing Mind are “fused” and we don’t recognize the difference."
IDEA #2: BELIEVE NOT WHAT'S TRUE, BUT WHAT'S HELPFUL
"The problem is that not every belief helps us. And some beliefs hurt us."
IDEA #3: THE PRIME BELIEF
"There is a realization from which all potential personal growth emerges. This is the realization that you are responsible for everything you do in your life, no matter the external circumstances."
I suggest taking time to really soak in these 3 points. They're not revolutionary nor life changing yes that is true but they force you to pause and have little moments of introspection.
May 25, 2025
Honestly the best distillation of knowledge i ever seen. I wish i started my reading journey with this book.
This book is 24 pages long and brings the ideas of 10 other books (as always the incentives of self help authors is always different that the one from readers). It is direct to the point and a great book
1. Your thoughts are not yourself. Differentiate between thinking mind and observing mind
2. Choose helpful beliefs, not true ones that aren’t helpful
3. You have control over your life
It’s funny how all this good advice comes from a picking girls guru and not from psychologists, honestly Nassim Taleb is right, people with skin in the game are the ones that give the best advice
This book is 24 pages long and brings the ideas of 10 other books (as always the incentives of self help authors is always different that the one from readers). It is direct to the point and a great book
1. Your thoughts are not yourself. Differentiate between thinking mind and observing mind
2. Choose helpful beliefs, not true ones that aren’t helpful
3. You have control over your life
It’s funny how all this good advice comes from a picking girls guru and not from psychologists, honestly Nassim Taleb is right, people with skin in the game are the ones that give the best advice
September 11, 2025
Great 30 min morning coffee read.
As someone who lives with severe ADHD, learning to separate my thinking mind (yeah, the one that thinks about everything all at once, and never stops) with my observing mind is an incredibly powerful tool to have in my arsenal.
I am someone who is typically perceived to be on the more confident and unbothered side of the social spectrum. However, in my head that is not always the case until I am under some sort of hyperactive focus. This text taught me that, yes, my mind will likely always be racing, but I have the power to control that and observe what is causing that. Reading this has allowed me to take action and observe my thoughts, and learn more about myself, rather than letting them consume me.
Definitely recommend giving this one a try. I’ll probably read it again in the future!
As someone who lives with severe ADHD, learning to separate my thinking mind (yeah, the one that thinks about everything all at once, and never stops) with my observing mind is an incredibly powerful tool to have in my arsenal.
I am someone who is typically perceived to be on the more confident and unbothered side of the social spectrum. However, in my head that is not always the case until I am under some sort of hyperactive focus. This text taught me that, yes, my mind will likely always be racing, but I have the power to control that and observe what is causing that. Reading this has allowed me to take action and observe my thoughts, and learn more about myself, rather than letting them consume me.
Definitely recommend giving this one a try. I’ll probably read it again in the future!
January 8, 2019
I did not expect my first book finished in 2019 to be an e-book but here we are. It was a nice reintroduction to the concept of the thinker and the observer. I've read about "becoming the observer" in relation to mindfulness meditation but the emphasis Manson places on the need for separating the thinking and observing mind is something that previously never clicked for me and this e-book really helped clarify that.
"Most of our psychological and emotional stress happens because our Thinking Mind and Observing Mind are 'fused' and we don't recognize the difference."
"Most of our psychological and emotional stress happens because our Thinking Mind and Observing Mind are 'fused' and we don't recognize the difference."
March 30, 2020
A short e-book on how we can change by taking responsibility of our circumstances and what happen to us. You can control your actions when you feel anger, anxiety, fear, etc by consciously changing some rather simple ways of thinking. This quick read can really be motivational and change your life if you take action; it is quite worth the read. The author is the same one who wrote "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck" and his other self-help books. I read it once, and will read it multiple more times till I can internalize it for myself; I really needed this.
Read
December 26, 2022It's like a long article detailing three concepts:
1. You have an observing mind and a thinking mind. This is an idea very explored in Buddhism and more recently in ACT and CBT.
2. Believe what is helpful and not what is true or seems true. Why have beliefs that stop you from enjoying life or that bring sadness?
3. Take full responsibility of your beliefs and all that happens to you, good or bad. This makes you practical when choosing beliefs and you change them according to life experience.
1. You have an observing mind and a thinking mind. This is an idea very explored in Buddhism and more recently in ACT and CBT.
2. Believe what is helpful and not what is true or seems true. Why have beliefs that stop you from enjoying life or that bring sadness?
3. Take full responsibility of your beliefs and all that happens to you, good or bad. This makes you practical when choosing beliefs and you change them according to life experience.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 12, 2023
- There is a realization from which all potential
personal growth emerges. This is the realization that
you are responsible for everything you do in your life,
no matter the external circumstances.
- Responsibility allows us to leverage our pain for
empowerment, to transmute our suffering into strength, our
loss into opportunity.
personal growth emerges. This is the realization that
you are responsible for everything you do in your life,
no matter the external circumstances.
- Responsibility allows us to leverage our pain for
empowerment, to transmute our suffering into strength, our
loss into opportunity.
August 12, 2018
Non è un vero libro. Difatto sono 3 lunghi Post di un Blog collegati insieme. Interessante. Con affermazioni controintuitive. Ma forse troppo breve. Le affermazioni sono buttate li, senza i necessari studi od esempi utili a convincere.
January 27, 2019
I'm a big fan of Mark's writing since I've read his book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*uck.
Without subtleness, he clearly transmits his messages. This short ebook is a great way to start reading about self-knowledge.
Without subtleness, he clearly transmits his messages. This short ebook is a great way to start reading about self-knowledge.
March 26, 2022
“Separating your Observing Mind from your Thinking Mind is a habit that takes practice. But once you begin to do it, you’ll feel yourself becoming less and less of a slave to your thoughts and your emotions. You’ll take more control of your internal daily life and feel better about it.”
December 4, 2023
"When we become responsible for our own values, we no longer have to struggle to
make the world conform to our needs, rather we can adapt our own values to fit the
circumstances that confront us in the world."
make the world conform to our needs, rather we can adapt our own values to fit the
circumstances that confront us in the world."
October 20, 2017
I'm not normally a reader of books like this one. They're just not my thing. This one, however, came highly recommended by my good friend, so I read it and I'm so glad I did.
November 24, 2017
This was helpful
March 7, 2018
Make split brain theory work for you.
May 1, 2018
Very short book with three ideas that will make you think deifferently. It won't take very much time but could significantly affect your life.
August 24, 2018
pretty good thing
recommend it))
recommend it))
November 14, 2019
Emotions are not a choice. Behavior is.
https://myhighlightz.blogspot.com/201...
https://myhighlightz.blogspot.com/201...
Want to Read
May 25, 2020It doesn't even allow me to read tho wtf
Mxm
Mxm
June 21, 2020
A quick read on how to control your thought patterns and not get effected by everything around you.
July 17, 2020
The best guide for me
Mark manson is now my favorite writer
Mark manson is now my favorite writer
January 9, 2021
The book is a swift read. Crisp 24 pages about Self knowledge. It gives useful techniques on umm.... how to better manage your mind. Read on to find out more about it.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 42 reviews