Contrary to what one might assume from the title, How to Live Well with Chronic Pain and Illness is not just for those who live with lingering illness. This crisp, well written book was written from Bernhard's personal point of view—written on a laptop while in her bed. Bernhard does make the assumption that her audience is able to function to some extent. She points out that "we live in culture that repeatedly suggests that, with proper diet and lifestyle changes, no one need be sick and no one need be in pain." Among her numerous examples and suggestion on coping is using the internet to learn as much as possible about the illness, and, then following up by educating caregivers and friends. She emphasizes being honest about how one feels, not only with caregivers and friends, but with oneself. Bernhard found that she pushed herself too far often in the beginning of her illness. She reminds the reader to be conscious about the emotional pain and problems a family caregiver might experience.
A sampling of section headings gives an indication of the broad range of situation covered.
Skills to help with each day
Mindfulness; potent medicine for easing the symptoms of chronic illness
Responding wisely to troubling thoughts and emotions
Isolation and loneliness
Enjoy the life you have
For family, friends, caregivers and anyone concerned about chronic illness
There is no doubt, Bernhard says, that there will be times when one feels blue and when one longs for the past life free of pain. She gives us suggestions on how to use mindfulness and other techniques to bring oneself back to being fully present. "Although, I couldn't force my body to get better, I could heal my mind."
Bernhard has raised my consciousness about a possible future for myself, but even more importantly, about friends. A chapter which was very helpful to me is titled, "Oh, No! What the chronically ill hope others won't say." I'm guilty of the following: "You look great." I now know that when speaking to a friend with an on-going illness, it should be followed by, "And, how do you feel?" Physical appearances can be deceiving. For me, a lesson learned.
Bernhard addresses an important issue which occurs not only as we age, but sometimes with young people as well. Because she writes so well and clearly, anyone can learn from How to Live Well with Chronic Pain and Illness.
by Judith Helburn
for Story Circle Book Reviews
reviewing books by, for, and about women