What do you think?
Rate this book
My Neighbour, The Dictator
For readers of political memoir and coming-of-age history, a teenage girl’s eyewitness account of the 1965 Indonesian coup reveals life, love and survival as Suharto seizes power in Jakarta.
261 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 1, 2026
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
July 3, 2026
So beautifully written, so absolutely heartbreaking.
I really didn't know what to expect going into this book, for sure I didn't expect how hands on Tari Lang was with the youth socialist movement. It hit really close to home, this old-world Jakarta with it's intellectuals and artists entrenched deeply with activism. This was the Jakarta my mom told me about, the Jakarta of my grandparents' youth, both of whom definitely ran in some of those same circles.
I cannot imagine how it must have felt to have your life upended so completely at one of the most transformative years of adolescence, she narrated it all so beautifully. Activism and brutality juxtaposed so neatly with the life of a teenage girl, so tenderly balanced. The last few chapters of her and her brother leaving broke my heart. What an inspiring family.
And to think, this was just the start. This was the beginning of a dictatorship that lasted over 3 decades, that even I still managed to be born into. Watching from the other side of this canyon of time, seeing how hopeful these young activists were and the fire they nursed so early on, I'm shattered. We are living now in the wreckage.
While it can be argued things have gotten better in comparison to the iron fist our parents had to live under, we as a people have been set back severely through the cruelty and violence enacted upon us by the people who were supposed to lead us.
This makes me afraid because back then they had a nation of optimistic, educated, and organized youths, we don't have that anymore. The state funded youth movements, the tactics of mobilization, the cohesion that the kids of the past had, these were lost, purposefully snuffed out by a fascistic authoritarian power. These people and ideas are coming back, and I don't know if we, both the youths and adults of this era, are equipped to face them.
I really didn't know what to expect going into this book, for sure I didn't expect how hands on Tari Lang was with the youth socialist movement. It hit really close to home, this old-world Jakarta with it's intellectuals and artists entrenched deeply with activism. This was the Jakarta my mom told me about, the Jakarta of my grandparents' youth, both of whom definitely ran in some of those same circles.
I cannot imagine how it must have felt to have your life upended so completely at one of the most transformative years of adolescence, she narrated it all so beautifully. Activism and brutality juxtaposed so neatly with the life of a teenage girl, so tenderly balanced. The last few chapters of her and her brother leaving broke my heart. What an inspiring family.
And to think, this was just the start. This was the beginning of a dictatorship that lasted over 3 decades, that even I still managed to be born into. Watching from the other side of this canyon of time, seeing how hopeful these young activists were and the fire they nursed so early on, I'm shattered. We are living now in the wreckage.
While it can be argued things have gotten better in comparison to the iron fist our parents had to live under, we as a people have been set back severely through the cruelty and violence enacted upon us by the people who were supposed to lead us.
This makes me afraid because back then they had a nation of optimistic, educated, and organized youths, we don't have that anymore. The state funded youth movements, the tactics of mobilization, the cohesion that the kids of the past had, these were lost, purposefully snuffed out by a fascistic authoritarian power. These people and ideas are coming back, and I don't know if we, both the youths and adults of this era, are equipped to face them.
September 25, 2026
First of all, I didn’t know that this book was actually a translation of Tari Lang’s English-language book, My Neighbour, The Dictator. On Goodreads, the Indonesian title doesn’t have a link to Tari Lang’s English-language book. I only found out after trying to search for it online and discovering that the two books are actually the same book, just with different titles.
Yes, Tari Lang really did have Soeharto as a neighbour, and the Cendana house, where Soeharto and his family lived, was extremely close to Tari Lang’s family home on Teuku Umar. In fact, their houses were almost directly opposite each other. The saddest part is that her family’s lives were dictated by the violence and human rights abuses committed by Soeharto, particularly against her parents and her closest friends.
I bought this book last year, when it was first published and was being heavily promoted on the “New Arrivals” shelf at Gramedia Jalma. From the blurb alone, I found it very interesting, because this book is a memoir by someone who lived and grew up in the midst of the events surrounding G30S. Honestly, in terms of writing style, the book is written in a way that resembles fiction, which made it very easy for me to finish it in less than 3 days because the language and sentence structure are very easy to read. But yeah I recommend to read this on your caution because many violences and abuses explained in this book.
For that, I’m grateful to Mirna Yulistianti and Miguel Engelo Jonathan, who translated this book into Indonesian that is very comfortable to read. Tari Lang herself mentions that the book was originally written in English. And honestly, I’m somewhat traumatised when it comes to reading Indonesian translations published by Gramedia, because I often find Indonesian translations of books rather uncomfortable to read. Perhaps this is also because of Tari Lang’s own background as someone of mixed Indonesian-British heritage, which makes the way she expresses her story feel very natural.
Reading this book, I genuinely felt as though I was witnessing Tari Lang and her family’s perseverance in dealing with the inhumane, illegal “imprisonment” carried out under Soeharto’s illegitimate regime. Learning about the “fake history” and being introduced to so many books that reveal the truth about 1965 and the authoritarian, brutal, mad and ruthless nature of his regime made my blood boil and made me feel betrayed by history itself. Even now, after reading historical and history books about 1965, I will never acknowledge Soeharto as a legitimate president until the day I die. YES, MAY YOU ROT IN HELL, BASTARD!!
Through this book, I learned that Tari Lang grew up in a family that was very strong both ideologically and in terms of her parents’ approach to parenting. Tari Lang’s father always taught her about optimism, simplicity, kindness and patience in life. Imagine this: Tari Lang’s father was imprisoned more than twice during his lifetime and lived under Soeharto’s brutal regime, yet throughout this memoir, her father is always portrayed as humble and dignified, trying to guide his children towards a morally good life from behind prison bars.
And the reason for Tari Lang’s father’s imprisonment was never made clear. In fact, the book reveals that his imprisonment was carried out arbitrarily and seemingly at random, even though he was simply a civil servant who held a fairly senior position at the Ministry of Maritime Affairs. It is true that Tari Lang’s father was a sympathiser of the PKI and had been educated in a communist country in the past (Czechoslovakia), but he was not actively involved in organising within the PKI. Rather, he simply held certain views and was passively involved in discussions about an ideology that he was interested in, particularly communism and left-wing politics. However, he was not involved in the PKI and was not a party member. So yes, Soeharto did indeed commit these illegitimate crimes.
On the other hand, Tari Lang’s mother was a British woman who changed her nationality to Indonesian after marrying Tari Lang’s father. From Tari Lang’s mother, I learned about steadfastness, resilience, leadership, responsibility, wisdom, and what it means to always stand up and speak for the truth of the oppressed. She was a woman with a very strong character and, I would say, a real alpha woman.
Honestly, throughout this book, I was fascinated by Tari Lang’s stories about her mother. I could genuinely say that I would love to have a personality like Tari Lang’s mother, Carmel. Tari Lang’s mother worked with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and was also a lecturer. She was even a speechwriter for Soekarno, often writing speeches that Soekarno would deliver at state events.
You could say that her mother had a very open-minded and progressive approach to politics. From a young age, she encouraged Tari Lang to become actively involved in organisations and to learn to see the world from a broader perspective. Although Tari Lang came from a wealthy and privileged family, both of her parents, particularly her mother, always encouraged her to live a life based on hard work and open-mindedness.
It was also Carmel who introduced Tari Lang to the organisation IPPI (Ikatan Pemuda Pelajar Indonesia). This organisation was founded and supported by President Soekarno as an organisation for Indonesian students to develop progressive perspectives among the country’s youth. Tari Lang explains that IPPI was not a PKI-sympathising organisation, but that it did have political views that leaned towards the left and strongly supported Soekarno’s government.
The organisation was even frequently invited by Soekarno, and the Soekarno government provided them with a building called Gedung Pemuda as their headquarters. Carmel herself faced persecution under Soeharto’s brutal military regime. She was imprisoned at Kodim for three and a half years before eventually being released.
Although she was a PKI sympathiser and had a code name, in my opinion she was not actively involved in party activities or cadre recruitment. However, this woman clearly had progressive views on communism and socialism. Carmel’s name even became known internationally as that of a progressive and open-minded woman who was apparently feared by the superpower that was the United States. But honestly, I really admire Carmel.
This book brutally describes how many IPPI members were arrested, tortured, imprisoned and silenced, with many suffering both physical and psychological abuse under Soeharto’s ruthless regime. The majority of them, however, were not PKI sympathisers.
The book tells the story of how Tari Lang carried out an underground movement to help save her friends. The title of the book, Rumah dengan Pintu Biru (The House with the Blue Door), refers to the house Tari Lang used as part of her underground efforts to help her IPPI friends escape. Tari Lang herself even recounts how she was once arrested by the military and psychologically tortured by Soeharto’s brutal and inhumane regime.
One thing that bothered me somewhat was that around half of the book focuses heavily on the lives of members of both of her parents’ extended families, such as her aunts, uncles, grandparents and other relatives, who, in my opinion, do not contribute much to the main story or experience direct persecution under Soeharto’s regime.
Furthermore, there is an excessive amount of detail about traditions in Purwokerto society, including wedding customs, public celebrations and Javanese traditions. In my opinion, this makes the memoir feel somewhat disorganised and unfocused compared with the description and blurb provided for the book.
There are even many Indonesian traditions discussed in the book that I would consider common knowledge for Indonesian. Probably because this book was published on international level too. But I think this is a bit unnecessary for Indonesian version. Honestly, this somewhat disrupted my reading experience because there were simply too many digressions into trivial details like these. They also distracted me from the main focus idea of the memoar Several times, I actually skipped sections that I considered to be little more than unnecessary details.
This is really the only thing that bothered me and made the overall reading experience less enjoyable. So, in total, I would rate this book 3.8 out of 5!
And yes, Ibu Carmel, you rock, and you will be my role model in life when I have a family of my own someday!
Yes, Tari Lang really did have Soeharto as a neighbour, and the Cendana house, where Soeharto and his family lived, was extremely close to Tari Lang’s family home on Teuku Umar. In fact, their houses were almost directly opposite each other. The saddest part is that her family’s lives were dictated by the violence and human rights abuses committed by Soeharto, particularly against her parents and her closest friends.
I bought this book last year, when it was first published and was being heavily promoted on the “New Arrivals” shelf at Gramedia Jalma. From the blurb alone, I found it very interesting, because this book is a memoir by someone who lived and grew up in the midst of the events surrounding G30S. Honestly, in terms of writing style, the book is written in a way that resembles fiction, which made it very easy for me to finish it in less than 3 days because the language and sentence structure are very easy to read. But yeah I recommend to read this on your caution because many violences and abuses explained in this book.
For that, I’m grateful to Mirna Yulistianti and Miguel Engelo Jonathan, who translated this book into Indonesian that is very comfortable to read. Tari Lang herself mentions that the book was originally written in English. And honestly, I’m somewhat traumatised when it comes to reading Indonesian translations published by Gramedia, because I often find Indonesian translations of books rather uncomfortable to read. Perhaps this is also because of Tari Lang’s own background as someone of mixed Indonesian-British heritage, which makes the way she expresses her story feel very natural.
Reading this book, I genuinely felt as though I was witnessing Tari Lang and her family’s perseverance in dealing with the inhumane, illegal “imprisonment” carried out under Soeharto’s illegitimate regime. Learning about the “fake history” and being introduced to so many books that reveal the truth about 1965 and the authoritarian, brutal, mad and ruthless nature of his regime made my blood boil and made me feel betrayed by history itself. Even now, after reading historical and history books about 1965, I will never acknowledge Soeharto as a legitimate president until the day I die. YES, MAY YOU ROT IN HELL, BASTARD!!
Through this book, I learned that Tari Lang grew up in a family that was very strong both ideologically and in terms of her parents’ approach to parenting. Tari Lang’s father always taught her about optimism, simplicity, kindness and patience in life. Imagine this: Tari Lang’s father was imprisoned more than twice during his lifetime and lived under Soeharto’s brutal regime, yet throughout this memoir, her father is always portrayed as humble and dignified, trying to guide his children towards a morally good life from behind prison bars.
And the reason for Tari Lang’s father’s imprisonment was never made clear. In fact, the book reveals that his imprisonment was carried out arbitrarily and seemingly at random, even though he was simply a civil servant who held a fairly senior position at the Ministry of Maritime Affairs. It is true that Tari Lang’s father was a sympathiser of the PKI and had been educated in a communist country in the past (Czechoslovakia), but he was not actively involved in organising within the PKI. Rather, he simply held certain views and was passively involved in discussions about an ideology that he was interested in, particularly communism and left-wing politics. However, he was not involved in the PKI and was not a party member. So yes, Soeharto did indeed commit these illegitimate crimes.
On the other hand, Tari Lang’s mother was a British woman who changed her nationality to Indonesian after marrying Tari Lang’s father. From Tari Lang’s mother, I learned about steadfastness, resilience, leadership, responsibility, wisdom, and what it means to always stand up and speak for the truth of the oppressed. She was a woman with a very strong character and, I would say, a real alpha woman.
Honestly, throughout this book, I was fascinated by Tari Lang’s stories about her mother. I could genuinely say that I would love to have a personality like Tari Lang’s mother, Carmel. Tari Lang’s mother worked with the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and was also a lecturer. She was even a speechwriter for Soekarno, often writing speeches that Soekarno would deliver at state events.
You could say that her mother had a very open-minded and progressive approach to politics. From a young age, she encouraged Tari Lang to become actively involved in organisations and to learn to see the world from a broader perspective. Although Tari Lang came from a wealthy and privileged family, both of her parents, particularly her mother, always encouraged her to live a life based on hard work and open-mindedness.
It was also Carmel who introduced Tari Lang to the organisation IPPI (Ikatan Pemuda Pelajar Indonesia). This organisation was founded and supported by President Soekarno as an organisation for Indonesian students to develop progressive perspectives among the country’s youth. Tari Lang explains that IPPI was not a PKI-sympathising organisation, but that it did have political views that leaned towards the left and strongly supported Soekarno’s government.
The organisation was even frequently invited by Soekarno, and the Soekarno government provided them with a building called Gedung Pemuda as their headquarters. Carmel herself faced persecution under Soeharto’s brutal military regime. She was imprisoned at Kodim for three and a half years before eventually being released.
Although she was a PKI sympathiser and had a code name, in my opinion she was not actively involved in party activities or cadre recruitment. However, this woman clearly had progressive views on communism and socialism. Carmel’s name even became known internationally as that of a progressive and open-minded woman who was apparently feared by the superpower that was the United States. But honestly, I really admire Carmel.
This book brutally describes how many IPPI members were arrested, tortured, imprisoned and silenced, with many suffering both physical and psychological abuse under Soeharto’s ruthless regime. The majority of them, however, were not PKI sympathisers.
The book tells the story of how Tari Lang carried out an underground movement to help save her friends. The title of the book, Rumah dengan Pintu Biru (The House with the Blue Door), refers to the house Tari Lang used as part of her underground efforts to help her IPPI friends escape. Tari Lang herself even recounts how she was once arrested by the military and psychologically tortured by Soeharto’s brutal and inhumane regime.
One thing that bothered me somewhat was that around half of the book focuses heavily on the lives of members of both of her parents’ extended families, such as her aunts, uncles, grandparents and other relatives, who, in my opinion, do not contribute much to the main story or experience direct persecution under Soeharto’s regime.
Furthermore, there is an excessive amount of detail about traditions in Purwokerto society, including wedding customs, public celebrations and Javanese traditions. In my opinion, this makes the memoir feel somewhat disorganised and unfocused compared with the description and blurb provided for the book.
There are even many Indonesian traditions discussed in the book that I would consider common knowledge for Indonesian. Probably because this book was published on international level too. But I think this is a bit unnecessary for Indonesian version. Honestly, this somewhat disrupted my reading experience because there were simply too many digressions into trivial details like these. They also distracted me from the main focus idea of the memoar Several times, I actually skipped sections that I considered to be little more than unnecessary details.
This is really the only thing that bothered me and made the overall reading experience less enjoyable. So, in total, I would rate this book 3.8 out of 5!
And yes, Ibu Carmel, you rock, and you will be my role model in life when I have a family of my own someday!
January 21, 2026
Saya lumayan menikmati buku ini. Buku ini mengisahkan tentang kisah Tari Budiardjo pada masa kelam Indonesia pada tahun 1965, orde baru, dan masa saat ia memutuskan untuk pindah ke Inggris demi keselamatan. Lewat buku ini saya jd memiliki gambaran lebih mengenai masa kelam tersebut. Ending dari buku ini membuat perasaan saya jadi galau. Apalagi waktu bu Tari harus terpaksa pindah ke Inggris demi keselamatan dan meninggalkan semua orang yang beliau kasihi.
Tapi sejujurnya saya ingin membaca buku ini krn memang sedang tertarik untuk membaca mengenai sejarah Indonesia tahun 1965 - orde baru. Tapi menurut saya terlalu banyak hal yang tidak terlalu berkaitan dengan sejarah itu di buku ini. Sebagian besar buku ini juga mengisahkan tentang masa kecil bu Tari, atau masa2 liburan bu Tari misalnya, yg memang tidak bersangkutan pada sejarah 1960an itu sendiri. Jadi kadang saya merasa sedikit bosan. Tapi saya mengerti dan mengapresiasi karena momen-momen tsb adalah momen yang pasti sangat berharga untuk Bu Tari.
Lalu kadang saya suka kebingungan krn timeline di buku ini tidak linear. Saya juga menemukan hal yang tidak saya temukan faktanya di google (Bu Tari menulis kalau Soekarno pernah memberi pidato sampai 7 jam), yang membuat saya jadi bingung dengan kebenarannya.
Oleh karena itu saya memutuskan untuk memberi bintang 3.
Tapi sejujurnya saya ingin membaca buku ini krn memang sedang tertarik untuk membaca mengenai sejarah Indonesia tahun 1965 - orde baru. Tapi menurut saya terlalu banyak hal yang tidak terlalu berkaitan dengan sejarah itu di buku ini. Sebagian besar buku ini juga mengisahkan tentang masa kecil bu Tari, atau masa2 liburan bu Tari misalnya, yg memang tidak bersangkutan pada sejarah 1960an itu sendiri. Jadi kadang saya merasa sedikit bosan. Tapi saya mengerti dan mengapresiasi karena momen-momen tsb adalah momen yang pasti sangat berharga untuk Bu Tari.
Lalu kadang saya suka kebingungan krn timeline di buku ini tidak linear. Saya juga menemukan hal yang tidak saya temukan faktanya di google (Bu Tari menulis kalau Soekarno pernah memberi pidato sampai 7 jam), yang membuat saya jadi bingung dengan kebenarannya.
Oleh karena itu saya memutuskan untuk memberi bintang 3.
March 25, 2026
aku suka banget bacanya walaupun it took 2 months to finish this book.. suka karena ini pake latar waktu di era 1965 abis peristiwa G30S dan pergantian kekuasaan ( aku personally sll penasaran ama buku2 di tema latar tsb) trus pake POV penulis pas remaja/ABG di masa tersebut, jadi kebayang bgt gimana rempongnya pergaulan remaja saat itu, apalagi ini ortunya aktivis yg vokal sama pemerintah Dan beda culture jg. ga banyak memoar lokal yg berkesan buatku namun ini salah satunya. Walopun ada bbp part yg ceritain flashback pas ortu nya pertama kali ketemu, pas naik kapal laut, pas ke Purwokerto, di sela2 kecemasan takut ditangkap tentara dan dipenjara. Bahasa ya tuh ngalir jadi enak bacanya, bahkan bab 1 nya menurutku udh langsung menggebrak (ditambah setting lokasi di Jl Teuku Umar JKT) aku sample mikir rumahnya keluarga ini skrg masih ada ga sih atau udh dipugar.
September 20, 2026
[4 stars]
Born in Prague but raised in Jakarta, Tari Lang grew up as the daughter of a British woman who worked for the foreign minister and deputy prime minister in developing economic policies and a Javanese (Indonesian) father who was the deputy minister of maritime affairs. She was fourteen when the coup started and her parents, both left-wing intellectuals and government workers, were arrested and the country was plunged into a violent dictatorship. Military vehicles and troops were stationed on her home street (just down the road from the home of the president) and she’s forced to change schools multiple times to avoid her peers who know about her parent’s positions.
Lang is able to capture a youthful voice in her memoir. It reads like a diary kept during the time period, rather than a book looking back at the events (don’t worry, this is only in its tone and there are no “dear diary…” or anything like that to disrupt the flow). It is youthful, but not juvenile. Lang is able to write out her frustrations with her parents for not explaining certain things to her, her feeling of powerlessness as a young teen hearing about her older friends from her political student group being arrested, and how she wants to make her parents proud when she starts to find ways to help others after the coup strongly. It’s remarkable how Lang is able to really get the reader to feel how she must have felt at that young age during such horrific events.
There are a few odd things in this memoir that I just feel the need to point out, even if they didn’t affect my rating that much. For one, Lang (about 14-16 during the events of this memoir) is groomed multiple times by multiple grown men. On one occasion this is called out as being wrong (this case was an attempt by a notable poet inviting her on a “date”, not a drawn out grooming instance, though) but for the other two it is not acknowledged as anything out of the ordinary. I can understand Lang having complicated feelings about the “boyfriend” she had during this time period considering what ended up happening with the both of them and I don’t necessarily need Lang to pause her narration to stop and say “by the way, it was wrong of this man to pursue me considering our ages”, (after all, fifteen year old Lang saw nothing wrong with it and the memoir is told very close to the Lang of this time period) but even a throwaway line about looking back as an adult would have been welcome. Another thing that irked me was a few lines scattered about that feel like Lang poking fun at her young self for her leftist beliefs. There’s a line very near the end of the novel where she discusses her choice to be baptized and confirmed and she says something like “I was baptized from a communist fighter to a good Catholic girl” and, combined with how she mentions her future business work, it feels more like a genuine jab at her past self's beliefs and not a cheeky joke. I may have completely misread her tone, though, but I just felt like pointing these two things out because it bugged me.
Putting those aside, this was a great memoir about complete political and societal upheaval happening during a girl’s teenage years. It is a love letter to her parents and the other teenagers and adults who helped her and her family during these two years before they fled the country. It is also a look into how much a girl can love her country and the people in it everyday, even during one of its worst eras in history.
“My parallel universe life means I spend time with my Santa Theresia schoolfriends as a member of the Jakarta elite and a hard-working schoolgirl, on the one hand, and as an underground radial operative on the other.” pg. 159 ch. 13
Born in Prague but raised in Jakarta, Tari Lang grew up as the daughter of a British woman who worked for the foreign minister and deputy prime minister in developing economic policies and a Javanese (Indonesian) father who was the deputy minister of maritime affairs. She was fourteen when the coup started and her parents, both left-wing intellectuals and government workers, were arrested and the country was plunged into a violent dictatorship. Military vehicles and troops were stationed on her home street (just down the road from the home of the president) and she’s forced to change schools multiple times to avoid her peers who know about her parent’s positions.
Lang is able to capture a youthful voice in her memoir. It reads like a diary kept during the time period, rather than a book looking back at the events (don’t worry, this is only in its tone and there are no “dear diary…” or anything like that to disrupt the flow). It is youthful, but not juvenile. Lang is able to write out her frustrations with her parents for not explaining certain things to her, her feeling of powerlessness as a young teen hearing about her older friends from her political student group being arrested, and how she wants to make her parents proud when she starts to find ways to help others after the coup strongly. It’s remarkable how Lang is able to really get the reader to feel how she must have felt at that young age during such horrific events.
There are a few odd things in this memoir that I just feel the need to point out, even if they didn’t affect my rating that much. For one, Lang (about 14-16 during the events of this memoir) is groomed multiple times by multiple grown men. On one occasion this is called out as being wrong (this case was an attempt by a notable poet inviting her on a “date”, not a drawn out grooming instance, though) but for the other two it is not acknowledged as anything out of the ordinary. I can understand Lang having complicated feelings about the “boyfriend” she had during this time period considering what ended up happening with the both of them and I don’t necessarily need Lang to pause her narration to stop and say “by the way, it was wrong of this man to pursue me considering our ages”, (after all, fifteen year old Lang saw nothing wrong with it and the memoir is told very close to the Lang of this time period) but even a throwaway line about looking back as an adult would have been welcome. Another thing that irked me was a few lines scattered about that feel like Lang poking fun at her young self for her leftist beliefs. There’s a line very near the end of the novel where she discusses her choice to be baptized and confirmed and she says something like “I was baptized from a communist fighter to a good Catholic girl” and, combined with how she mentions her future business work, it feels more like a genuine jab at her past self's beliefs and not a cheeky joke. I may have completely misread her tone, though, but I just felt like pointing these two things out because it bugged me.
Putting those aside, this was a great memoir about complete political and societal upheaval happening during a girl’s teenage years. It is a love letter to her parents and the other teenagers and adults who helped her and her family during these two years before they fled the country. It is also a look into how much a girl can love her country and the people in it everyday, even during one of its worst eras in history.
“Sometimes I think that there is something quite exciting about this clandestine life until I am reminded that this isn't a game, it isn't an imaginary film scene, it's real life where people are going hungry, getting hurt, imprisoned, killed… Should I feel guilty about being able to hide behind another life in which I feel safe? I'm not sure, but there's no time to worry about these things, there's a lot I must do and a lot I want to do.” pg. 180 ch. 15
October 12, 2026
Rumah Dengan Pintu Biru, Tari Lang.
Saya terpengaruh untuk membaca buku ini kerana sinopsisnya menarik dan saya tidak pernah membaca cerita tentang kesengsaraan golongan elitis. Dan sehingga ke mukasurat terakhir, kita memang tidak akan dapat jawapan siapa di sebalik pintu biru seperti di dalam tajuk buku ini. Adakah saya kecewa? Of course, tidak.
Oleh kerana selama ni selalu membaca kesengsaraan kehidupan golongan kelas bawahan maka saya agak perlu menukar mindset ketika membaca buku ini yang kesengsaraan is not a competition.
This book is a memoir of a girl, the author yang mempunyai ibu yang berbangsa Inggeris dan bapa warganegara Indonesia. Latar masa memoir ini adalah ketika berakhirnya pemerintahan Soekarno dan bermulanya pemerintahan Soeharto. I don't really know the history that much but seems like Soeharto is a dictator. And pada zaman itu ramai yang menyokong Soekarno ditangkap dipenjara disiksa sebagai tahanan politik.
Maka, itu lah yang terjadi sepanjang buku ini. Bagaimana the author melalui zaman remajanya menyaksikan perjuangan ibubapa beliau ditahan dan dibebaskan tanpa henti sehinggalah mereka terpisah dan beliau dan adiknya dihantar pulang ke London.
What i like the most in the book, adalah ibu nya. I like her determination. Even suamiya ditangkap berkali kali, dia tetap mencari jalan membebaskan suaminya dan pada masa yang sama mencari jalan menafkahi keluarga di rumah. Dek kerana melihat ibu yang sebegitu, anaknya juga mengikut jejak langkah ibunya ke dalam kancah politik.
And on the last chapter, the author told us about perkembangan kawan kawannya, yang sama sama berjuang melawan rezim yang kejam. Even until their last breath and sampai ke tua pun mereka masih mempunyai hati yang baik dan berjuang menegakkan hak asasi manusia.
It was a good memoir. Walaupun aku masih curious siapa di belakang pintu biru tersebut. I interpret it as Soeharto yang tinggal di situ memandangkan she mentioned he lives nearby her house. And mungkin juga rumah tu yang menyimpan tahanan politik? Jangan sampai aku cari support group nak kill this curiosity ye.
Saya terpengaruh untuk membaca buku ini kerana sinopsisnya menarik dan saya tidak pernah membaca cerita tentang kesengsaraan golongan elitis. Dan sehingga ke mukasurat terakhir, kita memang tidak akan dapat jawapan siapa di sebalik pintu biru seperti di dalam tajuk buku ini. Adakah saya kecewa? Of course, tidak.
Oleh kerana selama ni selalu membaca kesengsaraan kehidupan golongan kelas bawahan maka saya agak perlu menukar mindset ketika membaca buku ini yang kesengsaraan is not a competition.
This book is a memoir of a girl, the author yang mempunyai ibu yang berbangsa Inggeris dan bapa warganegara Indonesia. Latar masa memoir ini adalah ketika berakhirnya pemerintahan Soekarno dan bermulanya pemerintahan Soeharto. I don't really know the history that much but seems like Soeharto is a dictator. And pada zaman itu ramai yang menyokong Soekarno ditangkap dipenjara disiksa sebagai tahanan politik.
Maka, itu lah yang terjadi sepanjang buku ini. Bagaimana the author melalui zaman remajanya menyaksikan perjuangan ibubapa beliau ditahan dan dibebaskan tanpa henti sehinggalah mereka terpisah dan beliau dan adiknya dihantar pulang ke London.
What i like the most in the book, adalah ibu nya. I like her determination. Even suamiya ditangkap berkali kali, dia tetap mencari jalan membebaskan suaminya dan pada masa yang sama mencari jalan menafkahi keluarga di rumah. Dek kerana melihat ibu yang sebegitu, anaknya juga mengikut jejak langkah ibunya ke dalam kancah politik.
And on the last chapter, the author told us about perkembangan kawan kawannya, yang sama sama berjuang melawan rezim yang kejam. Even until their last breath and sampai ke tua pun mereka masih mempunyai hati yang baik dan berjuang menegakkan hak asasi manusia.
It was a good memoir. Walaupun aku masih curious siapa di belakang pintu biru tersebut. I interpret it as Soeharto yang tinggal di situ memandangkan she mentioned he lives nearby her house. And mungkin juga rumah tu yang menyimpan tahanan politik? Jangan sampai aku cari support group nak kill this curiosity ye.
August 9, 2026
This beautiful bitter-sweet memoir of a brutal - and relatively recent - chapter in Indonesia’s history is a very important addition to the literature of a period that is still not well understood. Tari Lang describes how her own family life was torn apart by political events beginning when she was only 14, the daughter of an affluent family living in the best area of Jakarta. Her parents were intellectuals, committed communists ( as was the government of President Sukarno) , both employed in senior positions in various ministries. Then came the events of Sept 1965 ( the Year of Living Dangerously) and overnight their privileged life changed.
Her parents were arrested and subsequently imprisoned for years, Tari herself was taken in and witnessed the torture of friends, she even became involved in highly dangerous resistance activity herself.
And yet, for all the fear, suspicion, isolation, danger, Tari was a teenager who loved fashion, pop music, parties, going to school, meeting friends, falling in love for the first time. This honest and revealing memoir, initially meant for her children and grandchildren so that they might understand about that part of the family story, is a poignant reminder of how even amongst the worst of times, life goes on. People still find joy in small things, the human spirit cannot be extinguished.
Her memoir is not just for those who love Indonesia. It applies to all children forced to grow up in the shadow of war, oppression and brutality. An important and timeless read.
Her parents were arrested and subsequently imprisoned for years, Tari herself was taken in and witnessed the torture of friends, she even became involved in highly dangerous resistance activity herself.
And yet, for all the fear, suspicion, isolation, danger, Tari was a teenager who loved fashion, pop music, parties, going to school, meeting friends, falling in love for the first time. This honest and revealing memoir, initially meant for her children and grandchildren so that they might understand about that part of the family story, is a poignant reminder of how even amongst the worst of times, life goes on. People still find joy in small things, the human spirit cannot be extinguished.
Her memoir is not just for those who love Indonesia. It applies to all children forced to grow up in the shadow of war, oppression and brutality. An important and timeless read.
August 11, 2026
My neighbour, the dictator is the memoir of a 14 year old girl, who lives in Indonesia during the 1965 military coup. Her parents had important jobs within the Sukarno government and her father got arrested not long after the coup.
Reading this book felt a bit like reading Tari's diary. Everything is written in the present tense, so you feel like you are right there with her. She is growing up, having crushes, going to school and doing all of the things that a 14 year old girl would be doing, but she also has to deal with things that force her to grow up quicker.
I thought Tari was a very brave teenager, doing secret things for the resistance and trying to keep her head (and her brother's) above water when family members were imprisoned. She was courageous, resourceful and inspiring.
It was very interesting to learn about this time in Indonesian history, because I knew so little about it (which is a shame, especially because I am Dutch. Why are we not taught about this in school?)
I want to thank @tari_lang for sending me her memoir. It was beautiful and I loved reading it.
Reading this book felt a bit like reading Tari's diary. Everything is written in the present tense, so you feel like you are right there with her. She is growing up, having crushes, going to school and doing all of the things that a 14 year old girl would be doing, but she also has to deal with things that force her to grow up quicker.
I thought Tari was a very brave teenager, doing secret things for the resistance and trying to keep her head (and her brother's) above water when family members were imprisoned. She was courageous, resourceful and inspiring.
It was very interesting to learn about this time in Indonesian history, because I knew so little about it (which is a shame, especially because I am Dutch. Why are we not taught about this in school?)
I want to thank @tari_lang for sending me her memoir. It was beautiful and I loved reading it.
April 8, 2026
Penambahan kepinggan puzzle tahun 65 pada sosok Tari Lang yg cukup privilege dengan darah campuran Indonesia-Inggris. Akan tapi, beliau tidak luput dari dampak yg disebabkan oleh kejadian gempar pada era kudeta 1965 yg kita dan dunia cukup familiar. 🙃🧩
Aku jadi nambah POV juga mengenai bagaimana perkembangan sosok anak mixed race yg hidup pada lingkungan yg lebih dari cukup tapi tetap dalam didikan yang merumput! 🌱 Mengingatkan kita pula bahwa integritas dan rasa hormat adalah kualitas2 hebat yg tidak bisa dg mudah dikesampingkan. Itu yg membuat kita menjadi manusia yg peduli terhadap sesama. 🥹
Ada sedikit yg janggal di buku ini, ada beberapa foto yg tidak ada keterangan nya membuatku bertanya2 “loh ini siapa?”.😵💫 Entah kesalahan pada editing atau penerbit, cukup mengganggu karena tidak ada informasi tambahan. Semoga cetakan ulang kedepan nya bisa lebih dikoreksi dan membaik. Overall, 3.5/4🌟
Aku jadi nambah POV juga mengenai bagaimana perkembangan sosok anak mixed race yg hidup pada lingkungan yg lebih dari cukup tapi tetap dalam didikan yang merumput! 🌱 Mengingatkan kita pula bahwa integritas dan rasa hormat adalah kualitas2 hebat yg tidak bisa dg mudah dikesampingkan. Itu yg membuat kita menjadi manusia yg peduli terhadap sesama. 🥹
Ada sedikit yg janggal di buku ini, ada beberapa foto yg tidak ada keterangan nya membuatku bertanya2 “loh ini siapa?”.😵💫 Entah kesalahan pada editing atau penerbit, cukup mengganggu karena tidak ada informasi tambahan. Semoga cetakan ulang kedepan nya bisa lebih dikoreksi dan membaik. Overall, 3.5/4🌟
September 12, 2026
A story of a dark and turbulent period in Indonesia witnessed through the eyes of a teenage girl living in Menteng, whose parents were part of the leftist movement and intellectual elites in Jakarta before 1965.
She lives a privileged childhood, by her family’s values and principles, before suddenly stripped away by her neighbour, the general and dictator, none other than Soeharto.
I felt something unsettling familiarity, as though what happened before might be happening again now in Indonesia
How Indonesia lost so many good, smart, and dedicated people, and how crucial movements are. Also how it means to feel betrayal, heartbreak, seeing your loved ones tortured, but still find resilience and courage.
Through her story, I also learned more about Carmel Budiardjo, a founder of TAPOL and her spirit. She is a prominent activist, described by the newspaper Media Indonesia as Soeharto’s “number one enemy” who challenged Soeharto’s regime.
She lives a privileged childhood, by her family’s values and principles, before suddenly stripped away by her neighbour, the general and dictator, none other than Soeharto.
I felt something unsettling familiarity, as though what happened before might be happening again now in Indonesia
How Indonesia lost so many good, smart, and dedicated people, and how crucial movements are. Also how it means to feel betrayal, heartbreak, seeing your loved ones tortured, but still find resilience and courage.
Through her story, I also learned more about Carmel Budiardjo, a founder of TAPOL and her spirit. She is a prominent activist, described by the newspaper Media Indonesia as Soeharto’s “number one enemy” who challenged Soeharto’s regime.
Read
November 28, 2025Buku ini bercerita tentang hidup Tari yang awalnya nyaman di lingkungan elit intelektual, lalu berubah dalam sekejap ketika kedua orang tuanya ditangkap tanpa pengadilan. Ia mendadak harus menjadi kepala rumah tangga. Ia mengurus adiknya, tetap bersekolah, dan tetap aktif di organisasi pemuda.
Memoar ini memakai alur maju mundur. Tari mengenang masa sebelum 1965, saat hidupnya nyaman dan dia belajar adat Jawa dari keluarga ayahnya di Purwokerto. Lalu cerita bergeser ke masa setelah 1965, ketika pergolakan politik mulai menyentuh hidup mereka secara langsung.
Di tengah gejolak politik, Tari tetap mengalami hal yang seharusnya jadi cerita remaja. Pesta kecil. Cinta pertama. Pertemanan yang hangat. Semuanya bertabrakan dengan realitas politik yang jauh lebih keras dari usia Tari
Kalau kamu ingin melihat sejarah 65 lewat kisah seorang remaja, buku ini layak kamu coba
Memoar ini memakai alur maju mundur. Tari mengenang masa sebelum 1965, saat hidupnya nyaman dan dia belajar adat Jawa dari keluarga ayahnya di Purwokerto. Lalu cerita bergeser ke masa setelah 1965, ketika pergolakan politik mulai menyentuh hidup mereka secara langsung.
Di tengah gejolak politik, Tari tetap mengalami hal yang seharusnya jadi cerita remaja. Pesta kecil. Cinta pertama. Pertemanan yang hangat. Semuanya bertabrakan dengan realitas politik yang jauh lebih keras dari usia Tari
Kalau kamu ingin melihat sejarah 65 lewat kisah seorang remaja, buku ini layak kamu coba
September 21, 2026
I loved this book! Having been a Kennedy-Lugar YES student (exchange student) in Indonesia from 2011-12, while many decades apart from Tari’s story, I felt that I was reliving some of my youth (in terms of the lighter subject matter), while learning more about Indonesian culture and history in the process. While this book deals with some heavy themes, you can also see how people adapt and overcome challenges, and I came away from the book wanting to become more politically active. I had a hard time putting this book down because her story was so interesting.
November 16, 2025
i will rating this book 3.5!
aku suka banget karena jadi tau keadaan sebelum atau setelah masa orde baru tuh gimana. Mungkin yang bikin aku agak bosan ketika baca ini adalah buku nya sangat biografi jadi beneran nyeritain kehidupan bu tari saat masa itu dan menurut aku pribadi ada beberapa part yang seharusnyaa tidak dimasukkan tapi mungkin dimasukkan dengan alasan tertentu and for Carmel Budiardjo the woman you are... hidup perempuan yang melawan!!!
aku suka banget karena jadi tau keadaan sebelum atau setelah masa orde baru tuh gimana. Mungkin yang bikin aku agak bosan ketika baca ini adalah buku nya sangat biografi jadi beneran nyeritain kehidupan bu tari saat masa itu dan menurut aku pribadi ada beberapa part yang seharusnyaa tidak dimasukkan tapi mungkin dimasukkan dengan alasan tertentu and for Carmel Budiardjo the woman you are... hidup perempuan yang melawan!!!
December 21, 2025
It was nice to learn what really had happened during the 1960s and 70s. I had been hearing stories from some people and reading some posts on social media about that era. But I couldn't be sure whether those were rumors or facts. Reading this book, published by Gramedia, I can assure myself that it actually happened.
November 16, 2025
memoar yang pedih tapi penting.
September 20, 2026
ever so often we forget that in the era of fascist dictators there were girls too
Read
October 13, 2026I have a LOT to say about this book, it gives the reader so much to think about! But I must say this has an all timer postscript of 'here's what everyone got up to after'
June 10, 2026
A very sweet, well-written and entertaining book about a young woman's experience of politics and political turmoil in 1960s Indonesia.
I understand the author wrote it so her children could understand her life and find the resilience and strength to endure troubled times. I can certainly see how it is meant to inspire. However, I couldn't help but find a great deal of poignant sadness within it as well.
I do not know whether it was a conscious decision, but I found the protagonist's loss of innocence mirrored a wider loss of hope and idealism in Indonesian politics and youth activism. So much of what is described has been lost.
While the author went on to enjoy a full career and happy life, and there is much valuable advice here about resilience in times of struggle, one cannot help but keenly feel the loss of socialist idealism, ground down beneath the blank face of military fascism, and wonder what might have been.
I understand the author wrote it so her children could understand her life and find the resilience and strength to endure troubled times. I can certainly see how it is meant to inspire. However, I couldn't help but find a great deal of poignant sadness within it as well.
I do not know whether it was a conscious decision, but I found the protagonist's loss of innocence mirrored a wider loss of hope and idealism in Indonesian politics and youth activism. So much of what is described has been lost.
While the author went on to enjoy a full career and happy life, and there is much valuable advice here about resilience in times of struggle, one cannot help but keenly feel the loss of socialist idealism, ground down beneath the blank face of military fascism, and wonder what might have been.
December 24, 2025
I give three-stars because the book is well-written as a personal experience.
In terms of historical facts, the content is debatable. The story is about Tari herself who was a teenager when the the communist party unleashed their failed coup (the English publisher takes us to a detour from historical reality by saying it was "Suharto's coup" for its marketing purpose). The military coup that initially targeted the military generals that eventually led to anti-communist purge in the subsequent years.
In this memoir, Tari portrayed herself as a pro-Sukarno (who was portrayed as the victim here, although his closeness toward the communist party was well-documented) and an engaging young political observer at that time. It's quite fascinating to see the students' sophisticated meetings in that era. Her own mother, Carmel, was a famous left-wing political activist, and it's interesting to read about her activism in Jakarta.
I appreciate the author's eloquent description of the era and her experiences in Jakarta back in the 60s, and for that this book gives such a valuable picture. This book doesn't fully cover the communist purge (if some readers expected it), although it provides the readers an alternative and personal perspective about what's happening in Jakarta.
But again, readers must keep in mind that this book is a memoir, not a political study, and its political content should be open to debate.
In terms of historical facts, the content is debatable. The story is about Tari herself who was a teenager when the the communist party unleashed their failed coup (the English publisher takes us to a detour from historical reality by saying it was "Suharto's coup" for its marketing purpose). The military coup that initially targeted the military generals that eventually led to anti-communist purge in the subsequent years.
In this memoir, Tari portrayed herself as a pro-Sukarno (who was portrayed as the victim here, although his closeness toward the communist party was well-documented) and an engaging young political observer at that time. It's quite fascinating to see the students' sophisticated meetings in that era. Her own mother, Carmel, was a famous left-wing political activist, and it's interesting to read about her activism in Jakarta.
I appreciate the author's eloquent description of the era and her experiences in Jakarta back in the 60s, and for that this book gives such a valuable picture. This book doesn't fully cover the communist purge (if some readers expected it), although it provides the readers an alternative and personal perspective about what's happening in Jakarta.
But again, readers must keep in mind that this book is a memoir, not a political study, and its political content should be open to debate.
May 7, 2026
my first time being the first reviewer of a book on goodreads(!!!) this is such an interesting memoir, so eye-opening even for me, an indonesian who knows her history. however this book is laden with typos, wrong punctuations, and incorrect grammars which i found quite distracting at times.
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews