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The Instruction Manual to Being a Vampire
These Vampires don’t play by the rules.
A nameless woman arrives in a police station drenched in blood and wearing a necklace of severed fingers, claiming that she is the witness to thirty-three murders. Through her interview with a detective, we discover how she met Herwig Roth, an elderly vampire priest who serves justice in equal measure to the blood drained from each of his victims.
The Instruction Manual to Being a Vampire is a study of loneliness, grief, and more importantly, of understanding who you truly are.
A nameless woman arrives in a police station drenched in blood and wearing a necklace of severed fingers, claiming that she is the witness to thirty-three murders. Through her interview with a detective, we discover how she met Herwig Roth, an elderly vampire priest who serves justice in equal measure to the blood drained from each of his victims.
The Instruction Manual to Being a Vampire is a study of loneliness, grief, and more importantly, of understanding who you truly are.
278 pages, Paperback
Published June 9, 2026
About the author
Craig Wallwork
33 books124 followersCraig Wallwork was born in Manchester, England. He is the three times Pushcart Prize nominated writer of over 50 short stories, and the author of the books The Sound of Loneliness, Bad People (Tom Nolan Book 1), Labyrinth of the Dolls (Tom Nolan Book 2), The Ghost of Stormer Hill (Tom Nolan Book 3), The Skin We Feel Most Comfortable In, Human Tenderloin, Quintessence of Dust, and Gory Hole. He lives in West Yorkshire, England.
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Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
June 20, 2026
I like to think that as an author and avid reader, it’s hard to be taken for a walk anymore. You tend to pick up on things you see a mile away.
This book walked me like a dog. Every time I thought I knew where it was going, it would pivot right up until the end. Quite simply, one of the best vampire stories I’ve ever read.
This book walked me like a dog. Every time I thought I knew where it was going, it would pivot right up until the end. Quite simply, one of the best vampire stories I’ve ever read.
June 13, 2026
This is one hell of a read. One of my favourites of the year.
A slow burn, but by the time we hit part III, there is no stopping the fire.
The writing is off the charts, too.
Different class.
Seek it out.
Five stars. No question.
A slow burn, but by the time we hit part III, there is no stopping the fire.
The writing is off the charts, too.
Different class.
Seek it out.
Five stars. No question.
August 30, 2026
Hold up. Just hold up one freakin’ minute. Truborn Press dropped an unexpected front‑runner for my favorite read of the year, and somehow you’re all sleeping on it. How is no one else reading this book yet? It’s flying under your radars and frankly, you should be ashamed.
The book opens with a woman strolling into a police station covered in blood, wearing a necklace made of severed fingers, calmly announcing she’s the witness to thirty‑three murders. That’s page one. From there, Wallwork hits the gas and never lets up.
As the investigation unravels, we learn our narrator narrowly escaped a late‑night attack thanks to an elderly vampire priest named Roth — the same priest who recently appeared at her grief counseling session, which she reluctantly attends after her father’s death in an attempt to find connection and eavesdrop on other's sufferings. After witnessing the brutal way he dispatches her attacker, she teams up with Roth to help him hunt the “bad blood” he needs in order to survive. Think Dexter, but swap the forensics for fangs. Both murderers with weird moral codes.
Wallwork shines a whole new light on the vampire genre and torches the tired damsel‑in‑distress narrative while he’s at it. Our leading lady is nobody’s victim. She goes toe‑to‑toe with anyone who has the balls to cross her path.
But here’s the kicker: beneath all the gore, the book digs deep into loneliness, grief, and the hollow ache of trying to keep living when life keeps taking. It’s as much about redemption as it is about revenge... a fist punching straight up through blood, bile, and despair. And just when you think you’ve got the whole thing figured out, Wallwork’s like… uh… no ya’ don’t.
This one’s a wild, bloody, unexpectedly tender standout... and absolutely a contender for my top reads of the year.
For fans of In The Valley of the Sun and Coffin Moon.
The book opens with a woman strolling into a police station covered in blood, wearing a necklace made of severed fingers, calmly announcing she’s the witness to thirty‑three murders. That’s page one. From there, Wallwork hits the gas and never lets up.
As the investigation unravels, we learn our narrator narrowly escaped a late‑night attack thanks to an elderly vampire priest named Roth — the same priest who recently appeared at her grief counseling session, which she reluctantly attends after her father’s death in an attempt to find connection and eavesdrop on other's sufferings. After witnessing the brutal way he dispatches her attacker, she teams up with Roth to help him hunt the “bad blood” he needs in order to survive. Think Dexter, but swap the forensics for fangs. Both murderers with weird moral codes.
Wallwork shines a whole new light on the vampire genre and torches the tired damsel‑in‑distress narrative while he’s at it. Our leading lady is nobody’s victim. She goes toe‑to‑toe with anyone who has the balls to cross her path.
But here’s the kicker: beneath all the gore, the book digs deep into loneliness, grief, and the hollow ache of trying to keep living when life keeps taking. It’s as much about redemption as it is about revenge... a fist punching straight up through blood, bile, and despair. And just when you think you’ve got the whole thing figured out, Wallwork’s like… uh… no ya’ don’t.
This one’s a wild, bloody, unexpectedly tender standout... and absolutely a contender for my top reads of the year.
For fans of In The Valley of the Sun and Coffin Moon.
September 16, 2026
Ah! That was amazing! Truly enjoyed the mindf*ckery, the batshit crazy carnage, and the sentimental and bittersweet core between the two main protagonists.
What a spin to the vampire horror genre.
A blood-soaked woman with a necklace of severed fingers enters a police station to make a statement of witnessing a mass murder. The story back tracks to her meeting an old priest at a grief group, who also claims to be a vampire. She helps track down evil people to help sate his thirst, leading to an absolute bloodbath. With a unique twist ending, the emotional carnage of this book lingers long in your skin.
Bonus enjoyment if you're a cinephile and love endless quick wit and dark humour.
Highly underrated and recommended book and author. Please enjoy for yourself!
*Many triggers which leans slightly into the extreme horror sub-genre, such as:
Graphic violence and gore, rape, sexual assault, grief and death, torture, mutilation, homophobic violence, human trafficking, mental health, self-harm ideation.
What a spin to the vampire horror genre.
A blood-soaked woman with a necklace of severed fingers enters a police station to make a statement of witnessing a mass murder. The story back tracks to her meeting an old priest at a grief group, who also claims to be a vampire. She helps track down evil people to help sate his thirst, leading to an absolute bloodbath. With a unique twist ending, the emotional carnage of this book lingers long in your skin.
Bonus enjoyment if you're a cinephile and love endless quick wit and dark humour.
Highly underrated and recommended book and author. Please enjoy for yourself!
*Many triggers which leans slightly into the extreme horror sub-genre, such as:
Graphic violence and gore, rape, sexual assault, grief and death, torture, mutilation, homophobic violence, human trafficking, mental health, self-harm ideation.
July 23, 2026
From one of the best indie writers of all time generation, comes a story of macabre beauty and the longing for retribution. Masterfully told, Craig explores the darker and darkest sides of human existence, the thin line between good and bad - but also told in an astute and empathetic way, shedding a light on the corruption in our world and the growing pains of society. It was so good I couldn’t put it down… shades of Palahniuk at his best, but wholly what I’ve come to expect from the mind and pen of Wallwork - exceptional horror with bite!
June 17, 2026
It’s no secret that I love horror, and as such there are a few words that are apt to catch my attention when it comes to choosing my next read. "Vampire" is one of them. So when I saw the title of this new release from Craig Wallwork, I dusted off my wooden cross, polished the silver knife I keep next to the laptop, bought some garlic just in case and locked the windows at night as an extra precaution.
Wallwork’s vampire is amazingly human and this is what made me like him. His moral conduct, while appearing somewhat debatable, I cannot help but feel is right - and there you have it, a character I can get behind and cheer for to the end.
Herwig Roth (Roth, so close to “rot” it feels like a perfect name for a bloodthirsty creature), a man of the cloth who befriends an aimless young woman whose social skills seem to make her undesirable among those her age, is both a monster and not a monster. This contradiction is explored through the unlikely friendship that starts between him and the young woman, with profound consequences for both of them. Mix in a bit of humor, lots of references, a great dose of feminism and some intimately descriptive gory scenes, and you have a satisfying story that made me both want to rush to the end and slow it down so I’d have more to enjoy.
This is my second book by Craig Wallwork, Human Tenderloin being the first, and it won’t be my last. May his horror persist, but only between the pages of books, preferably with a vampire or two as main character(s). I’ll keep that wooden cross nearby.
Wallwork’s vampire is amazingly human and this is what made me like him. His moral conduct, while appearing somewhat debatable, I cannot help but feel is right - and there you have it, a character I can get behind and cheer for to the end.
Herwig Roth (Roth, so close to “rot” it feels like a perfect name for a bloodthirsty creature), a man of the cloth who befriends an aimless young woman whose social skills seem to make her undesirable among those her age, is both a monster and not a monster. This contradiction is explored through the unlikely friendship that starts between him and the young woman, with profound consequences for both of them. Mix in a bit of humor, lots of references, a great dose of feminism and some intimately descriptive gory scenes, and you have a satisfying story that made me both want to rush to the end and slow it down so I’d have more to enjoy.
This is my second book by Craig Wallwork, Human Tenderloin being the first, and it won’t be my last. May his horror persist, but only between the pages of books, preferably with a vampire or two as main character(s). I’ll keep that wooden cross nearby.
June 17, 2026
[For those who need them, the content warnings are on the last page, and I think they’re pretty important for this read. Buckle up.]
This is one of the most incredible things I’ve read in a long time. Craig’s writing is so good that I gave up highlighting passages and just flagged entire chapters. That being said, this is a brutal, dark, and often totally unhinged piece (again, content warnings on the last page). Slow burning grief that grows claws in the face of nauseating horrors. Blood soaked vigilante justice with a heavy dose of the surreal. I… I want to say more, but you’ve gotta just take this insane ride on your own.
Well done, Craig. Holy shit.
This is one of the most incredible things I’ve read in a long time. Craig’s writing is so good that I gave up highlighting passages and just flagged entire chapters. That being said, this is a brutal, dark, and often totally unhinged piece (again, content warnings on the last page). Slow burning grief that grows claws in the face of nauseating horrors. Blood soaked vigilante justice with a heavy dose of the surreal. I… I want to say more, but you’ve gotta just take this insane ride on your own.
Well done, Craig. Holy shit.
August 21, 2026
What an absolutely unhinged vampire story! A woman covered in blood arrives at a police station wearing a necklace of severed fingers and claims she is a witness to thirty-three murders. As her story unfolds, we meet Herwic Roth, an elderly vampire priest who has a very unconventional approach to justice.
This book was gruesome, bizarre, and wonderfully dark. I loved that this doesn't feel like your typical vampire novel. It's strange, disturbing, occasionally brutal, surprisingly thoughtful, and the writing is amazing. This was one wild ride from beginning to end. I can't say much else without giving too much of it away, but I highly recommend it.
This book was gruesome, bizarre, and wonderfully dark. I loved that this doesn't feel like your typical vampire novel. It's strange, disturbing, occasionally brutal, surprisingly thoughtful, and the writing is amazing. This was one wild ride from beginning to end. I can't say much else without giving too much of it away, but I highly recommend it.
August 11, 2026
Holy shit. I have read over 60 vampire books, so id like to consider myself a connoisseur, and this is in my top five. Spectacular writing, fantastic story; I cant wait to read more from this author. Instant classic.
July 15, 2026
Hilarious at times, obscenely gory most of the time, and actually quite profound. Not for the squeamish, but it is absolutely delicious.
September 12, 2026
What to say! If I could give more than 5 stars I would. I am in love with the characters and the way this story plays out. It's both funny and emotional in a way that has you laughing and crying within the same five consecutive pages. The main character is so well-developed and understood by the author, I felt instantly drawn to her and loved her completely with all her flaws by the end, she is so perfectly human and real.
I never thought I could sob so much to a vampire gore fest, but here we are. The relationship between the two leads is beautiful and interesting. The story is so fresh and exciting and raw with humanity. I could gush for ages about the writing style, it is so beautiful some lines are stuck in my head on repeat. I'm torn wanting to quote them here, but wanting everyone to experience them in context for the first time.
The themes of womanhood and finding yourself and your purpose are so well executed. It's like a horror-gore hotdog wrapped in a bun made with love. If I don't stop now, I'll go on forever, and I could! 5 stars minimum. Will cherish this book to the end of my days. You can pry it from my cold, dead hands.
I never thought I could sob so much to a vampire gore fest, but here we are. The relationship between the two leads is beautiful and interesting. The story is so fresh and exciting and raw with humanity. I could gush for ages about the writing style, it is so beautiful some lines are stuck in my head on repeat. I'm torn wanting to quote them here, but wanting everyone to experience them in context for the first time.
The themes of womanhood and finding yourself and your purpose are so well executed. It's like a horror-gore hotdog wrapped in a bun made with love. If I don't stop now, I'll go on forever, and I could! 5 stars minimum. Will cherish this book to the end of my days. You can pry it from my cold, dead hands.
July 27, 2026
Another great success by Wallwork. Full of blood, screams and twists. A real delight to read and written so strongly. Just when you think there is no life in vampire stories anymore there's something like this.
Review of advance copy received from Publisher
ⓇⒺⓋⒾⒺⓌ
The Instruction Manual To Being A Vampire -
Craig Wallwork
Do not go into this book expecting charming aristocratic monsters, or even an adolescent romantic with razor sharp teeth.
Do go into this book expecting, a gritty, non-glittery look at the hunger and rules of becoming a vampire.
The story follows a nameless female and a Priest named Herwig Roth, who strike up an unusual friendship that blurs the line between humanity and monstrosity.
You think you know about vampires? Think again!
I was hooked from the very first page, and I couldn’t put it down until the ‘bloody’ finale - incredible.
I loved how I got a real sense of the author’s personality throughout this book, (he’s actually quite funny - but don’t tell him I said that), and what Craig is passionate about, a love of cinema, music and of course writing.
Since 2020, I have whispered to any soul willing to linger in the dark that no one conjures horror quite like Craig Wallwork.
Now, in 2026, he emerges from the shadows once more. This is no familiar tale of fangs and moonlight, but a Vampire novel unlike anything you’ve read before - I guarantee it!
The Instruction Manual To Being A Vampire -
Craig Wallwork
Do not go into this book expecting charming aristocratic monsters, or even an adolescent romantic with razor sharp teeth.
Do go into this book expecting, a gritty, non-glittery look at the hunger and rules of becoming a vampire.
The story follows a nameless female and a Priest named Herwig Roth, who strike up an unusual friendship that blurs the line between humanity and monstrosity.
You think you know about vampires? Think again!
I was hooked from the very first page, and I couldn’t put it down until the ‘bloody’ finale - incredible.
I loved how I got a real sense of the author’s personality throughout this book, (he’s actually quite funny - but don’t tell him I said that), and what Craig is passionate about, a love of cinema, music and of course writing.
Since 2020, I have whispered to any soul willing to linger in the dark that no one conjures horror quite like Craig Wallwork.
Now, in 2026, he emerges from the shadows once more. This is no familiar tale of fangs and moonlight, but a Vampire novel unlike anything you’ve read before - I guarantee it!
July 9, 2026
📚👀 Okay ... Holy ****. I stayed up way too late last night finishing this. I can't even. This might just be my top read for the year. I wish I could write like this. I want to be like Craig Wallwork when I grow up. 🤣 Please don't let the cover fool you, this novel is quite gruesome and full of gore, so if that's your thing you're in for a treat. The blood soaked action scenes are delicious in and of themselves, but the plot ... My God the plot! 👏🔥 Just when I thought it couldn't get any better and I couldn't love it any more, that ending dropped and I'm still not over it. The protagonist is honest, hilarious, and endlessly entertaining. On top of all of that, this novel is a feminist anthem. I cannot recommend this enough. Excuse me while I go read everything the author has ever written.
August 22, 2026
I wasn’t expecting that!!!
Wallwork flips the vampire genre on its head and provides a fresh perspective that is profound, funny, and has more girl power than The Spice Girls.
Finally, we have a new heroine. And though she remains nameless, you’ll never forget her.
Too, I’ll never look at a rolling pin the same way.
Wallwork flips the vampire genre on its head and provides a fresh perspective that is profound, funny, and has more girl power than The Spice Girls.
Finally, we have a new heroine. And though she remains nameless, you’ll never forget her.
Too, I’ll never look at a rolling pin the same way.
July 23, 2026
I absolutely adored The Instructional Manual To Being A Vampire by Craig Wallwork. This book draws you slowly, leaving you wanting more. One of the best Vampire stories I have read in a long time!
August 22, 2026
The Instruction Manual to Being a Vampire is a truly original and captivating read that fans of vampire lore will devour.
Beautifully done and more than worthy of the FANGtastic pun!
Beautifully done and more than worthy of the FANGtastic pun!
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews