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How to Lose at Longing
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Expected 12 Oct 26From A. K. Herman, shortlisted for the 2025 OMC Bocas Prize for Caribbean Literature, Fiction, a collection of insightful, sensual and unsettling stories that explore longing, the peculiar human ache.
In “Keepsake,” a waitress and a sailor form an erotic bond out of survival and maybe a little help from the supernatural. In “The Rules” a daughter follows her mother’s twelve strict rules to secure a husband. In “Dance,” a young woman uses seduction to create rules of her own. In “Speedo,” a necklace heals a man’s mind, and reveals truths he wants to forget. In “Up Down,” indigenous people revolt against the Capuchin forced labor system with deadly and disturbing results. A devoted husband in “The Both,” searches for a way to keep both his wives, and himself, happy. In “Small Castles,” a live-in nanny is caught between fraying bonds with her host-family and powerful external forces. And in the title story, a lover’s sudden death forces an old man to return to the past and confront the roots of his own painful longing.
A mesmerizing, and, at times, surreal collection, How to Lose at Longing, reveals an author in command of the written word with emotionally resonant prose and characters, you’ll be thinking about long after the last word.
In “Keepsake,” a waitress and a sailor form an erotic bond out of survival and maybe a little help from the supernatural. In “The Rules” a daughter follows her mother’s twelve strict rules to secure a husband. In “Dance,” a young woman uses seduction to create rules of her own. In “Speedo,” a necklace heals a man’s mind, and reveals truths he wants to forget. In “Up Down,” indigenous people revolt against the Capuchin forced labor system with deadly and disturbing results. A devoted husband in “The Both,” searches for a way to keep both his wives, and himself, happy. In “Small Castles,” a live-in nanny is caught between fraying bonds with her host-family and powerful external forces. And in the title story, a lover’s sudden death forces an old man to return to the past and confront the roots of his own painful longing.
A mesmerizing, and, at times, surreal collection, How to Lose at Longing, reveals an author in command of the written word with emotionally resonant prose and characters, you’ll be thinking about long after the last word.
Kindle Edition
Expected publication October 12, 2026
About the author
A.K. Herman
2 books4 followersA. K. Herman is a poet and fiction author, born in Scarborough, Tobago. A. K.’s story collection, How to Lose at Longing, is forthcoming in October 2026. She has been shortlisted for the Commonwealth Short Story Prize, and her debut collection, The Believers, was shortlisted for the 2025 OCM BOCAS Prize in Caribbean Literature, Fiction. A. K.’s writing appears in various print and online journals, including Doek! Literary Journal, the Waterstone Review, Lolwe, Shenandoah Literary Journal, and others. A. K. lives in Brooklyn.
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews
July 17, 2026
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
I seem to be in the minority here, but I loved this collection! Maybe because I'm a working class person of color who immigrated from a third world country to a first world country in the hopes of a better life, so most of the story themes resonated with me. And for those experiences I've been lucky enough not to be in the position to relate to, the stories did an excellent job of showing me what they could've been like, and some of those stories stayed with me after I finished.
I think the stumbling block for many readers is the second story, Small Castles, because it's in 1st POV and the English (not just in the dialogue but in the narration) might be perceived as "broken" when it is, in fact, just how English developed in a certain part of the world. I did pause there myself, but when I returned to the book with the intent of really reading (and not just skimming while there's something streaming on the TV in the background, for example), I couldn't put it down.
The variety of the stories was great. I especially enjoyed Small Castles, Speedo, and The Rules + Dance. And I loved how there were speculative elements in some of them, too.
I seem to be in the minority here, but I loved this collection! Maybe because I'm a working class person of color who immigrated from a third world country to a first world country in the hopes of a better life, so most of the story themes resonated with me. And for those experiences I've been lucky enough not to be in the position to relate to, the stories did an excellent job of showing me what they could've been like, and some of those stories stayed with me after I finished.
I think the stumbling block for many readers is the second story, Small Castles, because it's in 1st POV and the English (not just in the dialogue but in the narration) might be perceived as "broken" when it is, in fact, just how English developed in a certain part of the world. I did pause there myself, but when I returned to the book with the intent of really reading (and not just skimming while there's something streaming on the TV in the background, for example), I couldn't put it down.
The variety of the stories was great. I especially enjoyed Small Castles, Speedo, and The Rules + Dance. And I loved how there were speculative elements in some of them, too.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
=> Short story collection
=> Caribbean influence
=> Themes of grief, longing & identity
=> Literary / speculative elements
📖 I really wanted to connect with this collection more than I ultimately did. The title itself carries such a strong emotional pull, and there were definitely moments throughout the stories that felt raw, intimate, and quietly powerful. A.K. Herman explores themes like grief, longing, religion, immigration, relationships, and fear in ways that often felt vulnerable and deeply human. There’s also a distinct Caribbean influence woven through many of the stories, which gave the collection a unique atmosphere and perspective I appreciated a lot.
🌊 Since short story collections are already a hit-or-miss format for me, I think part of my struggle came from not fully connecting with every story emotionally. Some stood out far more than others, especially Keepsake, Small Castles, Speedo, and the titular How to Lose at Longing. Those stories felt the most immersive and memorable to me, with characters and emotions that lingered after finishing.
✍️ At times, though, I found the pacing and shifts in style a little difficult to follow, which made it harder for me to stay fully engaged throughout the collection. A few stories felt more abstract or abrupt than I expected, especially toward the end, and I occasionally struggled to grasp what the stories were trying to say beneath the symbolism. Still, I appreciated how fearless the collection was in addressing difficult topics like discrimination, displacement, uncertainty, and emotional isolation without softening them for comfort.
⭐ Overall, this was a distinctive and thoughtful collection that simply worked unevenly for me personally. Even though not every story landed, I can absolutely see this resonating with readers who enjoy literary short fiction with emotional and experimental elements. It gave me quite a lot to think about, and I’ll definitely remember certain stories long after finishing.
Thank you to NetGalley, A.R. Phillips Press LLC, and A.K. Herman for the ARC.
=> Caribbean influence
=> Themes of grief, longing & identity
=> Literary / speculative elements
📖 I really wanted to connect with this collection more than I ultimately did. The title itself carries such a strong emotional pull, and there were definitely moments throughout the stories that felt raw, intimate, and quietly powerful. A.K. Herman explores themes like grief, longing, religion, immigration, relationships, and fear in ways that often felt vulnerable and deeply human. There’s also a distinct Caribbean influence woven through many of the stories, which gave the collection a unique atmosphere and perspective I appreciated a lot.
🌊 Since short story collections are already a hit-or-miss format for me, I think part of my struggle came from not fully connecting with every story emotionally. Some stood out far more than others, especially Keepsake, Small Castles, Speedo, and the titular How to Lose at Longing. Those stories felt the most immersive and memorable to me, with characters and emotions that lingered after finishing.
✍️ At times, though, I found the pacing and shifts in style a little difficult to follow, which made it harder for me to stay fully engaged throughout the collection. A few stories felt more abstract or abrupt than I expected, especially toward the end, and I occasionally struggled to grasp what the stories were trying to say beneath the symbolism. Still, I appreciated how fearless the collection was in addressing difficult topics like discrimination, displacement, uncertainty, and emotional isolation without softening them for comfort.
⭐ Overall, this was a distinctive and thoughtful collection that simply worked unevenly for me personally. Even though not every story landed, I can absolutely see this resonating with readers who enjoy literary short fiction with emotional and experimental elements. It gave me quite a lot to think about, and I’ll definitely remember certain stories long after finishing.
Thank you to NetGalley, A.R. Phillips Press LLC, and A.K. Herman for the ARC.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Thank you to NetGalley, A. R. Phillips Press LLC, and A. K. Herman for the ARC “How to Lose at Longing”.
I really really wanted to like this book more than I did. This is in no way a bad book, there were elements I loved and I do enjoy the concept of the book in general. The stories all touched on vulnerable emotions that are often not publicly spoken about, i.e. grief, uncertainty, fear, and of course longing. Each story was unique in its own way, but they all had a certain rawness to them.
However, at times I had a lot of trouble following along and staying interested. There were some minor inconsistencies in the writing style that contributed to the difficulties I sometimes faced in regards to the flow of the story.
Despite not being a fan of this book, I highly appreciate the awareness it brings to certain things such as discrimination.
As a final note, the title of this book was my favorite part.
I really really wanted to like this book more than I did. This is in no way a bad book, there were elements I loved and I do enjoy the concept of the book in general. The stories all touched on vulnerable emotions that are often not publicly spoken about, i.e. grief, uncertainty, fear, and of course longing. Each story was unique in its own way, but they all had a certain rawness to them.
However, at times I had a lot of trouble following along and staying interested. There were some minor inconsistencies in the writing style that contributed to the difficulties I sometimes faced in regards to the flow of the story.
Despite not being a fan of this book, I highly appreciate the awareness it brings to certain things such as discrimination.
As a final note, the title of this book was my favorite part.
August 5, 2026
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Started - 21/07/2026
Finished - 04/08/2026
Rating - 3 stars
The first thing that piqued my interest in this book was the title and cover. 'How to lose at longing' is a collection of short stories mainly focusing on different types of loss.
Personally, I did struggle slightly when first getting into some of the different stories mainly because some of the dialect and references used were unfamiliar to me (more of a me problem than the author)
My favourite story within the collection were the two about Jackie (The Rules and Dance). The two stories showcase how familial relationships can have such a lasting impact on not only a persons life, but also in how they form relationships, whether romantic or platonic, with others while navigating a life of so many new experiences.
Thank you to A.K. Herman, A. R. Phillips Press LLC and NetGalley for this free copy in exchange for an honest review.
Started - 21/07/2026
Finished - 04/08/2026
Rating - 3 stars
The first thing that piqued my interest in this book was the title and cover. 'How to lose at longing' is a collection of short stories mainly focusing on different types of loss.
Personally, I did struggle slightly when first getting into some of the different stories mainly because some of the dialect and references used were unfamiliar to me (more of a me problem than the author)
My favourite story within the collection were the two about Jackie (The Rules and Dance). The two stories showcase how familial relationships can have such a lasting impact on not only a persons life, but also in how they form relationships, whether romantic or platonic, with others while navigating a life of so many new experiences.
Thank you to A.K. Herman, A. R. Phillips Press LLC and NetGalley for this free copy in exchange for an honest review.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
4.5/5
How to Lose at Longing is a book of short stories containing ten stories:
How to Lose at Longing — 4/5
Small Castles — 4.5/5
Keepsakes — 4.5/5
Speedo — 5/5
The Rules — 5/5
Dance — 4/5
Rules, Ordinances and Understandings — 5/5
The Both — 4.5/5
Up, Down — 4/5
Afterword — 4.5/5
Overall, it was a very quick and lovely read. This is my first NetGalley ARC, so I read it right the way through. It took me three hours to read it. I normally don’t read short stories, but I wanted to explore different genres. I would recommend this to anyone who wants to start reading short stories. They are easy, fast-paced, and full of depth. They explore longing, human ache, and real-life situations.
I also really liked the changes between second- and first-person narration throughout the stories, as it kept things interesting. However, I feel this is important for readers to take into account, as some people don’t like first-person narration, while others don’t like second-person narration.
How to Lose at Longing is a book of short stories containing ten stories:
How to Lose at Longing — 4/5
Small Castles — 4.5/5
Keepsakes — 4.5/5
Speedo — 5/5
The Rules — 5/5
Dance — 4/5
Rules, Ordinances and Understandings — 5/5
The Both — 4.5/5
Up, Down — 4/5
Afterword — 4.5/5
Overall, it was a very quick and lovely read. This is my first NetGalley ARC, so I read it right the way through. It took me three hours to read it. I normally don’t read short stories, but I wanted to explore different genres. I would recommend this to anyone who wants to start reading short stories. They are easy, fast-paced, and full of depth. They explore longing, human ache, and real-life situations.
I also really liked the changes between second- and first-person narration throughout the stories, as it kept things interesting. However, I feel this is important for readers to take into account, as some people don’t like first-person narration, while others don’t like second-person narration.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
This collection didn’t quite work for me overall, although there were some moments that resonated. I’m not usually drawn to short stories, but the title caught my attention and felt full of promise. The themes are wide ranging; longing, relationships, love, religion, the supernatural, law elements, and there’s a distinct Caribbean influence running through the collection. Some of the stories are loosely connected, which added an interesting layer.
However, I found it difficult to fully connect with many of the stories. A few stood out more than others, particularly Keepsake and Small Castles. As a whole, though, the collection didn’t quite come together for me.
That said, it’s certainly a distinctive and unusual collection, and not what I was expecting, and may appeal to readers looking for something different, just not for me. Thank you to NetGalley for the free ARC.
However, I found it difficult to fully connect with many of the stories. A few stood out more than others, particularly Keepsake and Small Castles. As a whole, though, the collection didn’t quite come together for me.
That said, it’s certainly a distinctive and unusual collection, and not what I was expecting, and may appeal to readers looking for something different, just not for me. Thank you to NetGalley for the free ARC.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
This was a really poignant collection of short stories. The central themes of loss were explored in really thought provoking ways even though all the stories didn't hit for me. My favorite stories were definitely the titular 'How to Lose at Longing', and 'Speedo'. Along with the central theme of longing, there's a caribbean aspect to most of these stories. A lot of stories dealt with immigration, and didn't shy away from difficult topics. The characters in most of the stories felt real, and i empathized with the impossible positions many of them were put in. I do feel like I didn't fully understand some of the stories, particularly the last story was a pretty unexpected shift that I still don't fully get. Overall, this collection gave me a lot to think about.
Thanks to Netgalley and A. R. Phillips Press for the advanced copy!
Thanks to Netgalley and A. R. Phillips Press for the advanced copy!
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
This is my first time reading Herman’s work and I truly enjoy her writing style. This is also my first time reading stories with Caribbean influences and references in them, so it was a fun experience that made me want to learn more. Personally, I always liked reading short story collections, so this book works very well for me.
Some stories stood out for me, especially Small Castles, Keepsake, and Jackie’s story (The Rules and Dance). Even with my lack of knowledge about the culture and references (I’m not from the US, nor the Caribbean), I can still feel connected to the stories and the characters, which I think speaks a lot about this book. While I do find it harder to immerse myself in the last story in this work (Up, Down), I still had a great time reading How to Lose at Longing.
Thank you NetGalley and A.R Phillips Press LLC for the ARC!
Some stories stood out for me, especially Small Castles, Keepsake, and Jackie’s story (The Rules and Dance). Even with my lack of knowledge about the culture and references (I’m not from the US, nor the Caribbean), I can still feel connected to the stories and the characters, which I think speaks a lot about this book. While I do find it harder to immerse myself in the last story in this work (Up, Down), I still had a great time reading How to Lose at Longing.
Thank you NetGalley and A.R Phillips Press LLC for the ARC!
May 23, 2026
Interesting short stories, based mainly in New York City, featuring immigrants and their lives.
I just found most of the stories wanting but I did appreciate the awareness the stories brought of the issues they faced.
The one that resonated most was the first story though; of Euni and her role as a nanny. Her employers were wealthy white people with brats for children, the woman of the pair was horrible and snobby, paying low wages, reluctant to support Euni’s labour card that she needed. I’d recently seen ‘The Help’ and I could just see what it was like.
Thanks to NetGalley and A.R Phillips Press LLC for this ARC.
I just found most of the stories wanting but I did appreciate the awareness the stories brought of the issues they faced.
The one that resonated most was the first story though; of Euni and her role as a nanny. Her employers were wealthy white people with brats for children, the woman of the pair was horrible and snobby, paying low wages, reluctant to support Euni’s labour card that she needed. I’d recently seen ‘The Help’ and I could just see what it was like.
Thanks to NetGalley and A.R Phillips Press LLC for this ARC.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
I was lucky enough to find an advanced copy of this collection on Netgalley. Thanks to A. K. Herman and for making it available. This collection of slice of life short stories all capturing various vignette' of the Caribbean experience in America.
The characters are written beautifully with brilliant symbolism. Nary a happy ending between them so be prepared to shed a tear.
I did find it difficult to parse some of the dialect but it was fitting to the story and the more complex words were provided in a glossary.
The characters are written beautifully with brilliant symbolism. Nary a happy ending between them so be prepared to shed a tear.
I did find it difficult to parse some of the dialect but it was fitting to the story and the more complex words were provided in a glossary.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
This is my second collection by Herman and I enjoyed the stories for the most part as they explored themes and experiences that are very familiar to me being for the Caribbean.
The ways in which she wrote the relationships whether queer or not is very representative of a lot of relationships in the Caribbean.
The perceptions of manhood, how to get and keep a man, imbalance in romantic relationships, and the historical call back to the indigenous peoples of the region were all found within these stories.
The ways in which she wrote the relationships whether queer or not is very representative of a lot of relationships in the Caribbean.
The perceptions of manhood, how to get and keep a man, imbalance in romantic relationships, and the historical call back to the indigenous peoples of the region were all found within these stories.
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
Thank you to A.R Phillips Press and Netgalley for the e-arc!
This let me down. After enjoying her first collection I thought this would go the same way but it didn't have the magic that the first one did. The stories were too long, there wasn't much diversity in content even though the characters and setting changed and all of them were sad, I would have appreciated a reprieve every now and then but I know it was the intention from reading the author note. I just didn't like the process of reading this much. A collection that should have taken me a week took a month to finish.
This let me down. After enjoying her first collection I thought this would go the same way but it didn't have the magic that the first one did. The stories were too long, there wasn't much diversity in content even though the characters and setting changed and all of them were sad, I would have appreciated a reprieve every now and then but I know it was the intention from reading the author note. I just didn't like the process of reading this much. A collection that should have taken me a week took a month to finish.
Review of advance copy received from Netgalley
It's an incredibly thought provoking read, emotive and powerful with the exploration of a wide range of impactful topics. The approach and style of writing isn't quite there for me though, and I think that just stems from me perhaps not being the 'right' audience.
How to Lose at Longing ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Small Castles ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Keepsake ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Speedo ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Rules ⭐️⭐️
Dance ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Rules, Ordinances and Understandings ⭐️⭐️
The Both ⭐️⭐️
Up, Down ⭐️⭐️
How to Lose at Longing ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Small Castles ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Keepsake ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Speedo ⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Rules ⭐️⭐️
Dance ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Rules, Ordinances and Understandings ⭐️⭐️
The Both ⭐️⭐️
Up, Down ⭐️⭐️
Review of advance copy received from NetGalley
I love to read books that have anthology feel to it so this was right up my alley. Each chapter told a story of an immigrant and their experiences. I felt nostalgic for most of the book since a lot of the stories took place in New York City. The stories were easy to follow as well.
August 25, 2026
How to Lose at Longing by AK Herman is a collection of short but mostly forgettable stories. I think the only story that stood out for me was the first one, which just so happened to be the book title too.
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the eARC.
Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the eARC.
Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews