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MindWorks: A Practical Guide for Changing Thoughts, Beliefs and Emotional Reactions
Why do we generate thoughts and emotional reactions which drive us to sabotaging behaviors and emotional drama? Making life altering changes requires more than just telling yourself to think happy thoughts. Learning to understand and shift your point of view, your beliefs and even your language, can end much of the emotional suffering you create for yourself and in relationships.
MindWorks offers a simple guide for understanding the complexities of your mind's inner workings and a step by step practice to facilitate change. Whether your transformation is large or small, you will surely look at yourself and the world in a completely new way.
As humans we live in two worlds. The first is the external, physical world of family, friends, work, and environment. The second is the internal world of our mind, imagination, thoughts, emotions, and beliefs: an inner world that can feel just as real to us as the first one. This book is about that second world and how to change what happens there.These two worlds aren’t separate—they impact each other all the time. In particular, our internal world invisibly influences how we experience and relate to the external world around us. Our overactive mind, driven by our beliefs, can sabotage our relationships and our attempts at happiness while tempting us to point the finger at everyone else. Our beliefs and thoughts can also convince us that we are somehow lacking, that we don’t deserve happiness and success, or that we are essentially failures. The result is a lot of unnecessary, unpleasant emotional reactions and unhappiness.
As children we were naturally happy. As we grew up, our perceptions and experience became conditioned by the values, beliefs, and emotional patterns we absorbed from those around us. We learned to please others and sought approval from them; when we got it, we felt loved and accepted. We also learned to fear their criticism and to feel hurt by it.
Over the years we developed our own thoughts and beliefs about our self-worth and value, and we adopted behavior patterns accordingly. We created our own emotions and emotional reactions based on our own beliefs. If we succeeded or won we felt good about ourselves; if we failed we automatically felt bad about ourselves. We developed a part of our mind to constantly assess ourselves and find ourselves good enough or not good enough throughout the day. Our mind ran automatically with opinions, thinking, and emotional responses whether we wanted it to or not. If we want to live in happiness that is sustainable, we will have to take steps to free ourselves from these automatic thought patterns and emotional reactions.
This book offers clear explanations and several practices to help you change how your mind works. Once developed, you can apply these skills to any situation for the rest of your life. Within these pages you will find and understand in a commonsense way:
• How beliefs are formed.
• Why many of our beliefs are unconscious to us and yet affect our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
• Practical exercises to identify and effectively change these beliefs.
• How to focus your attention and perspective in a way that can reduce and eliminate emotional reactions.
• How to inventory and organize your beliefs so that you don’t become overwhelmed and confused by your emotional reactions and conflicting thoughts and behaviors.
• How to recover the personal power previously lost to your beliefs and the unnecessary emotions they create.
• Why you feel the emotions you feel and practical tools to make changes in yourself.
• Why many self-help techniques or other attempts at change are often ineffective or make things worse, and how to avoid those pitfalls.
MindWorks offers a simple guide for understanding the complexities of your mind's inner workings and a step by step practice to facilitate change. Whether your transformation is large or small, you will surely look at yourself and the world in a completely new way.
As humans we live in two worlds. The first is the external, physical world of family, friends, work, and environment. The second is the internal world of our mind, imagination, thoughts, emotions, and beliefs: an inner world that can feel just as real to us as the first one. This book is about that second world and how to change what happens there.These two worlds aren’t separate—they impact each other all the time. In particular, our internal world invisibly influences how we experience and relate to the external world around us. Our overactive mind, driven by our beliefs, can sabotage our relationships and our attempts at happiness while tempting us to point the finger at everyone else. Our beliefs and thoughts can also convince us that we are somehow lacking, that we don’t deserve happiness and success, or that we are essentially failures. The result is a lot of unnecessary, unpleasant emotional reactions and unhappiness.
As children we were naturally happy. As we grew up, our perceptions and experience became conditioned by the values, beliefs, and emotional patterns we absorbed from those around us. We learned to please others and sought approval from them; when we got it, we felt loved and accepted. We also learned to fear their criticism and to feel hurt by it.
Over the years we developed our own thoughts and beliefs about our self-worth and value, and we adopted behavior patterns accordingly. We created our own emotions and emotional reactions based on our own beliefs. If we succeeded or won we felt good about ourselves; if we failed we automatically felt bad about ourselves. We developed a part of our mind to constantly assess ourselves and find ourselves good enough or not good enough throughout the day. Our mind ran automatically with opinions, thinking, and emotional responses whether we wanted it to or not. If we want to live in happiness that is sustainable, we will have to take steps to free ourselves from these automatic thought patterns and emotional reactions.
This book offers clear explanations and several practices to help you change how your mind works. Once developed, you can apply these skills to any situation for the rest of your life. Within these pages you will find and understand in a commonsense way:
• How beliefs are formed.
• Why many of our beliefs are unconscious to us and yet affect our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
• Practical exercises to identify and effectively change these beliefs.
• How to focus your attention and perspective in a way that can reduce and eliminate emotional reactions.
• How to inventory and organize your beliefs so that you don’t become overwhelmed and confused by your emotional reactions and conflicting thoughts and behaviors.
• How to recover the personal power previously lost to your beliefs and the unnecessary emotions they create.
• Why you feel the emotions you feel and practical tools to make changes in yourself.
• Why many self-help techniques or other attempts at change are often ineffective or make things worse, and how to avoid those pitfalls.
282 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 1, 2014
326 people are currently reading
520 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
July 28, 2018
Another Must-Read self help book. I guess this is one of the books that every teacher, parent and individual should read, to have better understanding of their beliefs and emotions. The author describes a beautiful model of how emotions work, and logical exercises to attempt to change them. It starts by describing Beliefs and Belief Bubbles, why they are made and why they are false, and dissolve them. Simply, I loved the book. Gary also have a blog called pathwayToHappiness, and a podcast, which both worth following.
January 16, 2022
A really valuable asset when it comes to looking closely at our own beliefs. They say the only limits we have are the ones we impose on ourselves. In my opinion, the number of people trying to challenge that assumption is way too little. However, for those who do, this book is just what the doctor ordered.
Furthermore, MindWorks finds great value when you look at it closely and see various connections that tie it to other sources of information on life and healthy attitude.
For instance, some time ago, I was reading about a buddhist spiritual master that was talking to one of his students.
The student was often very angry and that anger was also directed to his master. At some point he asked the master "How can I stop being angry?", to which the master replied that if he really is an angry person, he should show it right then and there and produce that anger.
The student was then put on the spotlight and, surprised, he couldn't.
After a brief pause, the buddhist master told him: "See, if you can't produce it at will, then anger is not really a part of your true self, because then you could control it." Clever, right?
Well, in MindWorks, somewhere around mid book, you'll bump into the following lines: "To help make the point clear, do an experiment. Make an agreement with yourself that you won’t be critical of anyone, including yourself, for a week. See how long you are able to do it. Finding out you can’t control the Judge is a clue that the Judge is not the reality of you."
I truly recommend reading MindWorks several times, first as a simple book and then getting closer and closer to a workbook definition. If you try this, put your nose to the metaphorical grindstone and set your expectations aside, I believe there's a good chance your life might greatly improve.
Furthermore, MindWorks finds great value when you look at it closely and see various connections that tie it to other sources of information on life and healthy attitude.
For instance, some time ago, I was reading about a buddhist spiritual master that was talking to one of his students.
The student was often very angry and that anger was also directed to his master. At some point he asked the master "How can I stop being angry?", to which the master replied that if he really is an angry person, he should show it right then and there and produce that anger.
The student was then put on the spotlight and, surprised, he couldn't.
After a brief pause, the buddhist master told him: "See, if you can't produce it at will, then anger is not really a part of your true self, because then you could control it." Clever, right?
Well, in MindWorks, somewhere around mid book, you'll bump into the following lines: "To help make the point clear, do an experiment. Make an agreement with yourself that you won’t be critical of anyone, including yourself, for a week. See how long you are able to do it. Finding out you can’t control the Judge is a clue that the Judge is not the reality of you."
I truly recommend reading MindWorks several times, first as a simple book and then getting closer and closer to a workbook definition. If you try this, put your nose to the metaphorical grindstone and set your expectations aside, I believe there's a good chance your life might greatly improve.
December 26, 2023
MindWorks: A Practical Guide for Changing Thoughts, Beliefs, and Emotional Reactions is a thought-provoking and practical self-help book that explains the root cause of emotional drama and sabotaging behaviors, as well as offers some guidance for a positive change.
Gary van Warmerdam provides clear and detailed explanations of beliefs, perspective, characters of emotional drama (The Judge, The Victim, The Pleaser, The Fixer, The Princess, and The Villain), faith, etc., as well as great real-life examples and analogies to illustrate his points.
However, MindWorks gets quite repetitive, especially in the second half of the book.
What is more, the practical method for changing unwanted thoughts, beliefs, and emotional reactions is not specific enough for me as it lacks clear steps, stages, or checkpoints. The author's advice is basically do the same exercise - adopt an observer perspective to change your reaction to an event - over and over again until you get better at it and somehow end up where you want to be. Practice makes progress, that's true, but I still want to know that I'm on the right track heading in the right direction. And before you ask me, yes, I did practice when prompted in the book.
Gary van Warmerdam provides clear and detailed explanations of beliefs, perspective, characters of emotional drama (The Judge, The Victim, The Pleaser, The Fixer, The Princess, and The Villain), faith, etc., as well as great real-life examples and analogies to illustrate his points.
However, MindWorks gets quite repetitive, especially in the second half of the book.
What is more, the practical method for changing unwanted thoughts, beliefs, and emotional reactions is not specific enough for me as it lacks clear steps, stages, or checkpoints. The author's advice is basically do the same exercise - adopt an observer perspective to change your reaction to an event - over and over again until you get better at it and somehow end up where you want to be. Practice makes progress, that's true, but I still want to know that I'm on the right track heading in the right direction. And before you ask me, yes, I did practice when prompted in the book.
October 31, 2020
This is a book that deserves a re-read. The author shows how our belief system creates our reality and sometimes contributes to unhappiness or depression.
I see many similarities to IFS model (internal Family Systems) where “parts” of ourselves, often as protectors from childhood, compete for attention and define our emotions.
I liked that the author gives strategies for working through issues and encouragement. He also has a website and podcasts.
I see many similarities to IFS model (internal Family Systems) where “parts” of ourselves, often as protectors from childhood, compete for attention and define our emotions.
I liked that the author gives strategies for working through issues and encouragement. He also has a website and podcasts.
December 13, 2016
By constructing multiple versions of ourself in relation to a specific viewpoint it allows us to refer to this when gaining high level understanding of our circumstance. The world we perceive, how we see other people and interpretations change based on the character we adopt. When we have difficulty letting go of past events it is because we replay the memories in first person perspective instead of through the more mature lens we view the world in today. Using a preset range of archetypes (Judge, Victim, Pleaser, Fixer, Princess and Villian) helps to quickly equalize our reactions. Children develop automatic patterns by taking actions and observing reactions in others and this behavior we learn before learning how to talk. "If distraction, defense, and denial are the path of the ego, then keen observation with your attention, honest assessment, and acceptance of the facts are the path of integrity." Forgiving the character archetypes dismisses their power over us.
"One of the biggest emotions that we repress is love. As very young children we were free to dance and express excitement and joy through our body. While growing up, we were told not to be so silly, that laughing is inappropriate, and that we should be more serious. We learned that how we appeared to others was more important than expressing our joy. As we learned to be more responsible, we also tried to act more serious. All of these little moments add layers of energy that hold back our natural expressions of joy, wonderment, humor, creativity, curiosity, and love."
"One of the biggest emotions that we repress is love. As very young children we were free to dance and express excitement and joy through our body. While growing up, we were told not to be so silly, that laughing is inappropriate, and that we should be more serious. We learned that how we appeared to others was more important than expressing our joy. As we learned to be more responsible, we also tried to act more serious. All of these little moments add layers of energy that hold back our natural expressions of joy, wonderment, humor, creativity, curiosity, and love."
June 27, 2015
I found this book as well as Gary Van Warmerdam's website, articles, and podcasts to be extremely insightful and practical. He offers a thoughtful analysis of how people develop beliefs early in life and how these beliefs can become limiting later on. Reading this book led me to review my own thought processes and identify the ones that were holding me back. The best aspect of this book in my opinion were the suggested practices which guide one to develop more personal awareness. Getting inspiration from reading is the first step, but actively putting ideas into practice is the key to change. This book effectively synthesizes both aspects.
February 21, 2020
Repetition was used to propel the importance of structurally modifying one's perspective to assist changing one's reaction to an event.
I was excited to start this book but as I continued to read I found myself easily distracted. This in part was due to chapters being quite repetitive, alongside content presentation not arousing any interest other then to skim through chapters to get to the end.
I was excited to start this book but as I continued to read I found myself easily distracted. This in part was due to chapters being quite repetitive, alongside content presentation not arousing any interest other then to skim through chapters to get to the end.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 7, 2019
One of the best "self help" books I've ever read. Maybe his strategies wouldn't work for everyone, but I'll be practicing them every day. For a fresh start or getting your mind out of its funk, I highly recommend this book.
February 1, 2020
The most productive chapters are the last three. There is a lot of repetition, which gets old. I felt he was talking down to me as an adult to a child. He does have some valid points though.
January 20, 2020
Goal is a therapeutic tool (focus on false beliefs, audience people who want to overcome psychological difficulties), while MC’s goal is theory of mind’s operation (domain full range of people).
Belief assumed knowledge which cannot be completely proven. Type of knowledge that connects, explains, and/or predicts facts
Focuses on false beliefs and fear-based beliefs, ignoring the scope of useful beliefs and legitimate fears.
Mentions distinction from facts but doesn’t follow up on it.
Beliefs, four fundamental elements:
Perspective (p 45) precedes any interpretations, thoughts, beliefs, decisions
No, conscious thoughts and decisions are after, but interpretations and other cognition precede it and form it.
, attention, thoughts, personal power
Examples. Insecurity, low self-esteem, anger, jealousy.
Faith is amount of certitude about beliefs
Facts. Does not distinguish between simple and compound
Character archetypes (bubbles of beliefs) that exist in our personalities that are semi-independent.
Warmerdam’s idea of personal change has close relationship with Carol Dweck’s iMindset.
Dubious claims that are okay simplifications (or reversals) on the action level
Our beliefs affect our emotions.
Actually, emotions are formed 3S Imperatives shaped by personal experience
And beliefs are partial knowledge. Beliefs are developed and organized under different moral codes with different certainties
Emotions faster than thinking. He wants to limit thinking to consciously controlled thoughts, even excluding daydreams.
(p 72) How can Jane feel a victim one moment ... short while later completely confident. He asserts different character perspectives, without giving mechanism for shifting.
Alternation of short-term and long-term, and further alternation between various long-term possibilities
p 130 A person doesn’t start out being bad at math
Some, many do
p 142 thinking, 2 modes … conscious, purposeful use of language in our mind …automatic rambling … internal dialog
Shared beliefs
p 106. limited experience leads to rigid beliefs
p 113. (Victim) emotions … not an intellectual, rational kind of learning
Not conscious
p 124 Most of our beliefs lie below the conscious level
Interesting points
p 140 … contradictory and false nature of his belief system
p 145 … start with meaning … convert message to symbolism of words
Belief assumed knowledge which cannot be completely proven. Type of knowledge that connects, explains, and/or predicts facts
Focuses on false beliefs and fear-based beliefs, ignoring the scope of useful beliefs and legitimate fears.
Mentions distinction from facts but doesn’t follow up on it.
Beliefs, four fundamental elements:
Perspective (p 45) precedes any interpretations, thoughts, beliefs, decisions
No, conscious thoughts and decisions are after, but interpretations and other cognition precede it and form it.
, attention, thoughts, personal power
Examples. Insecurity, low self-esteem, anger, jealousy.
Faith is amount of certitude about beliefs
Facts. Does not distinguish between simple and compound
Character archetypes (bubbles of beliefs) that exist in our personalities that are semi-independent.
Warmerdam’s idea of personal change has close relationship with Carol Dweck’s iMindset.
Dubious claims that are okay simplifications (or reversals) on the action level
Our beliefs affect our emotions.
Actually, emotions are formed 3S Imperatives shaped by personal experience
And beliefs are partial knowledge. Beliefs are developed and organized under different moral codes with different certainties
Emotions faster than thinking. He wants to limit thinking to consciously controlled thoughts, even excluding daydreams.
(p 72) How can Jane feel a victim one moment ... short while later completely confident. He asserts different character perspectives, without giving mechanism for shifting.
Alternation of short-term and long-term, and further alternation between various long-term possibilities
p 130 A person doesn’t start out being bad at math
Some, many do
p 142 thinking, 2 modes … conscious, purposeful use of language in our mind …automatic rambling … internal dialog
Shared beliefs
p 106. limited experience leads to rigid beliefs
p 113. (Victim) emotions … not an intellectual, rational kind of learning
Not conscious
p 124 Most of our beliefs lie below the conscious level
Interesting points
p 140 … contradictory and false nature of his belief system
p 145 … start with meaning … convert message to symbolism of words
February 23, 2018
Really great book so far!!!!
I am only on chapter 1 maybe lol & I am absolutely loving it already!!! I love how Bill uses stories to show examples and how relatable they are! Incredible read so far & cannot wait to finished.. I’m taking advice as I read so cannot complain!!!
I am only on chapter 1 maybe lol & I am absolutely loving it already!!! I love how Bill uses stories to show examples and how relatable they are! Incredible read so far & cannot wait to finished.. I’m taking advice as I read so cannot complain!!!
July 22, 2018
Great book. A totally different approach to happiness. I'll definitely re-read it and start practicing. It sounds challenging but worth it
December 20, 2018
Inspirational insight
This book really connected with me and has helped me a lot, no doubt it’ll help others also living their life in mental conflict
This book really connected with me and has helped me a lot, no doubt it’ll help others also living their life in mental conflict
March 16, 2020
..
Awesome book...you will wonder..how does our thoughts details are known to the author... Must read...If you want to change your Life...
Awesome book...you will wonder..how does our thoughts details are known to the author... Must read...If you want to change your Life...
January 11, 2021
Probably the most important book I've ever read...
January 31, 2021
Wasn’t for me I’m afraid, read in installments as it just didn’t grip me.
December 26, 2024
I really wanted to give this more and I do believe there are some great things in here to really help you with changing your own negative thoughts and emotions to live a healthier life…
…however, this book isn’t as good as others that are similar and it begins to over explain, there are many moments where the writer could be more concise but obviously this is my personal view and I can see how and why this book would benefit many people!
…however, this book isn’t as good as others that are similar and it begins to over explain, there are many moments where the writer could be more concise but obviously this is my personal view and I can see how and why this book would benefit many people!
October 9, 2021
Absolutely brilliant work!!!
I dissolved my long held emotional patterns in just the 3 days when I read this book. Such an effective framework. Hope the result lasts for a long time!
I dissolved my long held emotional patterns in just the 3 days when I read this book. Such an effective framework. Hope the result lasts for a long time!
October 6, 2015
Great insights into dominant inner personality archetypes. Teaches how to use perspectives to understand and change how we operate.
October 19, 2020
A lot of information
There was a lot of information but it was beneficial. I have already taken the practices and applied them and have noticed a difference.
There was a lot of information but it was beneficial. I have already taken the practices and applied them and have noticed a difference.
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews