Such I Was

by Elaine Owen, Nancy Bean (Editor)

Elizabeth Bennet marries Fitzwilliam Darcy carrying a secret she hopes her husband will never discover. Determined to protect her family from financial ruin, she enters a marriage founded not on love, but on necessity—and on a deception that could destroy Darcy’s trust forever if the truth comes to light.

Yet life at Pemberley is not what Elizabeth expected. Beneath Darcy’s proud reserve she discovers loyalty, tenderness, and a depth of devotion that slowly transforms admiration into love. As their guarded relationship blossoms into genuine happiness, Elizabeth becomes painfully aware that the man she deceived is also the man she cannot bear to lose.

When old mistakes, family scandals, and long-buried truths threaten to tear them apart, Elizabeth and Darcy must decide whether a marriage built on falsehood can survive the truth.

This emotional variation on Pride and Prejudice is a story of regret, redemption, and two hearts learning that love is not proven by perfection, but by forgiveness.

393 pages, Kindle Edition

Published May 31, 2026

About the author

Elaine Owen was born in Seattle, Washington and was a precocious reader from a young age. She read Pride and Prejudice for the first time in ninth grade, causing speechless delight for her English teacher when she used it for an oral book report. She practiced writing in various forms throughout her teen years, writing stories with her friends and being chief editor of the high school yearbook. She moved to Delaware when she married.

In 1996 she won a one year contract to write guest editorials in the Sunday edition of The News Journal in Wilmington, Delaware, and she continued her writing habit in political discussion groups and occasional forays into fiction.

In 2014 she began to write Pride and Prejudice fan fiction and decided to publish her works herself to see if she might possibly sell a few copies. Thousands of books later, the results have been beyond her wildest hopes, and she plans to continue writing fiction for the foreseeable future.

When she's not writing her next great novel, Elaine relaxes by working full time, raising two children with special needs, and earning a third degree black belt in karate. She can be contacted at elaineowen1@lycos.com. Look for her on Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/ElaineOwenAu...

Reviews

[Suzan Lauder · Rating 4 out of 5]

Many great things about this book, including excellent introspection (with filters), interesting dialogue, and thorough character development. However, sometimes a good thing can be overdone, and E's guilt trip did get a bit tiresome. I was impressed that both protagonists changed in this book even though D's about-face was a hair quick. The editor needs a resource for non-Regency words and to read up on comma usage. But I couldn't put it down near the ending!

[J.C. Plummer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a pleasant read, but it was not as good as the author’s “Duty Demands” which is a favorite of mine, especially in audiobook format.

In this variation, Bingley leaves Netherfield in January, not late November after the ball. The author is consistent with this altered timeline, but I never understood the purpose of shifting the timing of his departure. It’s never explained.

3.5-stars rounded up. Read through KU.

I never like it when Georgiana is paired with Col Fitzwilliam. I know, I know – cousins married each other. Age differences weren’t so unusual. But I still find it icky.

I didn’t understand Jane’s final change of heart (there is more than one). It seemed to have no foundation based on her earlier issues with Bingley.

There are many pages of Elizabeth worrying and fretting. It got a bit old, and besides, her worries that Darcy would separate from her were tiresome because it was so unlikely based on marriage laws, his affection for her, and his need for an heir.

[Tracy DeNeal · Rating 5 out of 5]

Marvelous

What a beautiful retelling of this classic! I was truly amazed at the ebb and flow. True to form and character of everyone it was enjoyed immensely.

I must go back and read any of Elaine Owen’s books that I have missed.

[ESTHER E · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm glad I picked this one up! It's hard to imagine a different version of that beloved classic, Pride and Prejudice, but this one made me think about the original story in whole new ways! I'm going to read it again and again. Well done, Ms. Owen!

[Jacqueline Grace · Rating 5 out of 5]

SUCH I WAS

From beginning to end, I could not put this fantastic story down. Darcy and Lizzy sizzle in this adaptation of Jane Austin's masterpiece, Pride and Prejudice. I highly recommend this page turner, of love, deceit, and desire.

[Deb Hughes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fantastic variation

Elizabeth does not turn down Darcy when he asks her to marry him at Hunsford. He basically dictates like shorthand, when they should marry, what family members she will be able to see, etc., etc. As time goes on, he does change but not without hurdles. There will be confrontations and our characters will grow separately and together as they make their way forward.