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Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum

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Successful hubbie? Tick. Facebook-worthy baby? Tick. Bikini-body six weeks after giving birth? Um … not so much.Fashion PR exec Ally Bloom got her happy ending. Okay, her marriage might be showing the odd crack, her battleaxe mother-in-law might have come to stay, and she might not be the yummy mummy she'd imagined, but it's nothing a decent night's sleep and a firm commitment to a no-carb diet won't fix.But when Ally returns to work and finds she'll be reporting to a 22-year-old airhead, she decides to turn her back on life as a professional fashionista and embrace her inner earth mama instead.So it's out with the Louboutins and champagne and in with the sensible flats and coffee mornings with the Mummy Mafia. From attending her first grown-up dinner party only to discover that placenta is top of the menu to controlling her monster crush on local playgroup hottie Cameron, Ally must find her feet in the brave new world of the stay-at-home mum.‘Sharp and funny, Madden’s novel captures the realities of new-mummyhood. The perfect nap-time read, and by nap I mean wine.’ —Meg Mason, author of Say It Again in a Nice Voice‘[A] hilarious satire about modern motherhood’ —Practical Parenting‘Nothing wrong with extreme exaggeration in pursuit of a good laugh. I'd love to see Madden doing stand-up.’ —Country Style‘Slick, smart and skilful’ —Debbish‘Every now and then I read a book and I think, “Damn, I wish I wrote that!” That’s totally how I feel about Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum. I’m only half way through, but her novel is already so witty, entertaining and … relatable … it’s so nice to read a funny book that chronicles the joys of motherhood in such a humorous and honest way.’ —Summer Land‘Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum will make you giggle as you fly through the pages. I enjoyed it so much, I binge read it and knocked it over in a day.’ —Woogsworld‘If you are looking for a book to escape into under some bubbles, either in the bath or the champagne variety, this is a good one as it is easy to read, actually funny and allows you to voyeuristically follow the misadventures of someone far more disorganised and vague than yourself.’ —Wellington Times

366 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 22, 2015

6 people are currently reading
142 people want to read

About the author

Georgia Madden

1 book8 followers
Georgia Madden began her career in journalism at Homes & Gardens magazine in London, before returning to Sydney with her young family to work as a freelance writer. She writes for House & Garden, Inside Out and Home Beautiful, as well as a number of interiors websites. She lives in Sydney with her family.
Confessions Of A Once Fashionable Mum is her first novel.

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5 stars
32 (18%)
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43 (25%)
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73 (42%)
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16 (9%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 31 reviews
Profile Image for Shelleyrae at Book'd Out.
2,628 reviews561 followers
April 23, 2015

Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum by Georgia Madden is an entertaining, lighthearted tale about modern motherhood, marriage and fashion.

"I would be the type of yummy mummy real mothers could relate to, and had even coined the perfect hashtag for my instagram feed - #FashMum."

Being a SAHM is not quite working out the way Ally Bloom hoped. She adores her baby daughter but she has no interest in sitting cross-legged in a dirty school hall singing The Wiggles greatest hits with the 'Happy Mummies' and their snotty-nosed offspring. Now that her mother-in-law has come to stay it seems the perfect time to cut her maternity leave short and return to work as a PR executive for the prestigious fashion label Moda, but when Ally learns she has been replaced by a 22-year-old bimbo, she resigns and develops a master plan to become the perfect mother.

"3. Embrace inner earth mama: Weave, bake, plant fragrant herb path or veggie patch, and insta everything as I go along. Use tag #soblessed at least once per day."

Armed with Nigella Lawson's How To be a Domestic Goddess, a new wardrobe of cardigans and flats, and her master plan, Ally makes a sincere attempt to get it together and impress her husband, Matt, mother-in-law Judy and the mummy mafia. Her failures are amusing as Madden underscores the competitive edge of motherhood and the pressure of aiming for social media perfection.

"Safe to say, it was, quite possibly, the worst coffee morning in the history of coffee mornings. To top it all off, not one single moment of it had been worthy of my Instagram feed."

While Ally struggles to adjust to life as a permanent SAHM, she is also struggling with the changes parenthood has wrought in her marriage to Matt and Madden identifies the distance that can sometimes creep between couples with the shift in lifestyle and priorities. Cameron (aka #HotDaddy) provides a distraction for Ally who is flattered by his flirtation.

Madden pokes gentle fun at the members of 'Happy Mummies' who are reluctant to admit their lives before children had any value and whose toddlers have Mandarin tutors, wear only natural fibers and eat only organic, gluten free homemade foods. These women are alien to Ally who is quick to dismiss them as 'saddo losers' but slowly she discovers she has more in common with them than she thought, and when the group is threatened with closure, Ally is determine to save the day.

"Look, you might think Happy Mummies is just a bunch of mums singing stupid songs and making a mess of your school hall floor every Tuesday morning, but it's so much more than that...These women, the friendships you make, they have the power to save you, to keep you afloat, at a time in your life when you're not even sure how you are going to make it through the next day. I know because they saved me."

There is plenty of humour in this sharply amusing, well paced novel. Wry observation is teamed with snappy dialogue and sarcasm, the characters and scenes may be exaggerated for effect but include a kernel of truth and familiarity for any modern day mother.

#FashMum#Witty#Sharp#AGoodRead#NiceworkGeorgiaMadden
Profile Image for Deborah (debbishdotcom).
1,471 reviews145 followers
June 17, 2015
I was a tad worried that former PR fashion exec Ally Bloom was going to be annoyingly superficial, but thankfully she was far from it. Sure she's been existing in a world of fashion and wealth and wannabes but hasn't entirely quaffed the Kool Aid. She's sufficiently self-deprecating that it's hard not to connect with her.

Ally joins the Happy Mummies (a playgroup) on the advice of her doctor and discovers it's her worst nightmare.

The playgroup mums Madden offers us are extreme to say the least. In fact they're almost caricatures of OTT mothers and the worst nightmare of every non-domestically-inclined diva. But Madden's written Ally's cynical thought patterns and dialogue well. Ally doesn't have much of a filter and that's refreshing.

The book's also got a contemporary feel with a lot of social media references and each chapter is headed by a hashtag: #chickenpoxparties; #fistfights; #soNOTfuckingblessed and so forth.

I was surprised how much I enjoyed this novel. Not-being-a-mother thing is a bit of a sore point for me, but I had no time to wallow as I was caught up in Ally's exploits. And although I'm far from fashion-conscious or from that world I could seriously relate to her antipathy towards all-things-domestic.

Read the full review on my blog: http://www.debbish.com/books-literatu...
Profile Image for Melissa.
Author 38 books36 followers
March 5, 2016
I picked this book up on a whim. It was a fun, easy read and it was nice to read a book with a character who found parenting as hard as I did, especially in the beginning.

The main character, Ally, is a first time mum who is finding life as a SAHM challenging. She's struggling to find her place in a new world, including navigating playgroup life, and then her mother-in-law moves in to stay.

It was a fun, easy read.
Profile Image for Jess.
315 reviews18 followers
May 6, 2015
Disclaimer: I’m not a mum, but I still really enjoyed this book.

Don’t let the title fool you, you don’t need to be a mum to read and love this book. I’m not and while it didn’t rate as a 5 star read for me, it was still a fantastic book that was well written, entertaining, and with just the right balance of seriousness and humour that made me love the story, and the characters even more so. To be honest I read 90% of this book in one sitting in the bath because it was so good I didn’t want to put the book down or leave the characters just yet.

Ally Bloom lives and breathes the high fashion life as a PR executive at Moda, a prestigious fashion label in Sydney. She has the perfect husband Matt and her wedding was not only featured in NAME magazine, but it was given SIX page spread. So when she falls pregnant she’s ecstatic and quickly starts to envision her maternity leave as a holiday away from work; it’s got to be a walk in the park compared to her job after all.

What I loved about this book was the way Georgia wrote her character Ally. Ally Bloom doesn’t start out like a very likeable character and may not be every readers cup of tea. She’s self centred and totally bewildered by Motherhood (which many a new mums, read all, would naturally be), but her humour and honesty is her one saving grace. Having to swap top of the range designer clothes for ‘trackie’ pants and often dirty comfort clothing is hard for her and she mourns the loss of the clothes in her cupboard that she can no longer fit into her. In fact she resents this new lifestyle thrust upon her and can’t wait for the day for her darling daughter Coco turns 18, because after all that’s when fun interesting things start to happen. At times it’s this misplaced resentment and hostility to change that can/could turn readers away from liking Ally.

From very early on in the book I was conflicted about her, for on one hand she was this funny, funky, stylish almost-but-not-quite-diva who is used to getting her way and having minions to do her ‘dirty’ jobs for her. She lives the perfect life that one could only dream of attaining. She’s even penned her own hashtag, #FashMum to share all her yummy mummy snaps on Instagram, because failure is not a thought she has ever entertained. But it’s one she is going to come to face very quickly.

“I just wished he wouldn’t make me feel like such a complete failure every time we went anywhere near the subject. Sometimes it felt like he thought Coco would be in better hands with anyone other than me…”

Then on the other hand we have the reality of life after she gives birth, where her dreams of a year long relaxing sabbatical have just been shattered into a thousand tiny pieces, all of which reflect an over weight, unhappy bewildered 31 year-old who doesn’t know how she got here or how to get out of there. One who doubts her very place, and her partners love and respect. Ally’s belief that she needs to be perfect in every aspect of her life is her downfall, and the readers entertainment as we watch Ally try and take her place along side ‘stepford like’ “Yummy Mummies’ to prove that she is just as great a mum, or perhaps even better. Although I originally found this contrast and hostility in Ally off putting, I came to love Ally’s character for who she was, flaws and all, just as she does. For the one thing she holds more dear is her daughter Coco, who she will stand up and fight for her with every last breath in her body, even if it means sitting “in a dirt school hall, surrounded by twenty badly dressed mums and their snotty-nosed kids… pretending to be having the time of our lives”. So if you hate Ally at the beginning, keep reading. Trust me, you’ll love her by the end!

It’s here that I want to congratulate Madden on her ability to transforms a character who hates her life and is potentially suffering from post natal depression, not that she’d ever admit to that for her family viewed “depression [as being] just a polite way of saying ‘complete and utter loser'”, into one who fully embraces her new position and yet never loses any of her style (even if her clothes still don’t fit), or sense of self (for she knows what she most definitely isn’t), for Ally remains true to her core as the sarcastic and smart mouthed, natural born leader – even if she has to rediscover these things for herself along the way. I also want to congratulate Madden on the way she expertly balanced the light and often entertaining aspects of this narrative (think poo explosions, disastrous play dates, bitchy mummies, hoity toity judgement and general know it alls, and the experience of her first grown up dinner party and #hotdad crushes) with the more serious comments and social commentary that peak out from page to page.

Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum is a quirky take on the everyday struggles of modern motherhood in the current obsessed social networking world where every play date and tea party must be shared on instagram to be deemed a success. All though snort inducing funny at times thanks to Madden and Ally Blooms sarcasm and endless witty comebacks, it has a more serious side when dealing with the double edge sword of motherhood where your ever move is judged as a parenting success or a failure that you may never live down. I may not have experienced motherhood yet, but I feel like this book is realistic enough still, for it captures the best and worst parts of being a new mum and showcases it clearly for both sides (mothers and not-yet-mothers) to see, understand and appreciate and perhaps to relieve.

Confessions Of A Once Fashionable Mum is a highly enjoyable read that reads like The Devil Wears Prada, but with dirty nappies and Happy Mummies groupies and the odd piece of fashion advice.

This review was originally posted on The Never Ending Bookshelf and can be found here: http://wp.me/p3yY1u-BY
I received a copy of this book for an honest review from the author and published.
Profile Image for Michelle.
412 reviews18 followers
May 6, 2015
Book #15 for #AWW2015

Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum is a book that has left me in two minds. The premise is fantastic, it’s well written, it’s funny, it’s snarky and I enjoyed it BUT I wasn’t a huge fan of some of the characters and that did affect my enjoyment a little. Having said that, I think it may actually be more about me than anything else because I was a bit the same with my other weekend read.

Ally is a first time mum and things aren’t going quite the way she expected, she’s suffering mild depression and is quite isolated with a very limited support network. Her doctor suggests finding a local mother’s group, making some new friends and seeing how she goes.

Motherhood hasn’t quite been what Ally was expecting and until Coco her life largely revolved around the high maintenance, fast paced world of fashion, so there isn’t anyone in her life that she can really share the experience with; certainly no-one who would understand.

I am not a first time mum but I am a first time at home mum who has just started at Kindergym and is coming in contact with a lot of other mums in a way that I never experienced with my other children. So from this perspective I could really relate to where Ally is at. Fortunately for me I have a circle of friends who have children so I have never been without that support network, which is something PR exec Ally Bloom was lacking.

Ally’s maternity leave plans revolved around hitting the best coffee shops in the area looking fabulous in her pre-baby body and becoming the ultimate yummy mummy before returning to work, she went so far as to pick a replacement she had no faith in to ensure she was missed and they would be dying to have her back at work. Well, like every mother would know, the plans and the reality were worlds apart. Even as a third time mum my plans and the reality of life with a baby were very different.

The rest of the review can be found at: http://bookgirl.beautyandlace.net/boo...
Author 2 books2 followers
April 20, 2023
It is not easy to embrace mommy land. Going back to her high powered job is no longer a possibility, but reconciling to life with earth mamas is worse. Little Coco is reason enough, but with mother in law too in the scene, any rose tinted dreams of suburban life seems to have receded well. How will Ally get her foot in with the very people she once despised?
145 reviews2 followers
November 8, 2018
Obligatory school holiday chick lit. Woman doesn't want to be a stay at home mum. Decides to be a stay at home mum. Nails it. That's about it... Also, it's set in Australia which is really my favourite kind of chick lit these days.
146 reviews
August 23, 2019
Sydney-sider and former senior pr to top fashion label becomes a mum. Her experience of motherhood is over exaggerated; I couldn’t stand her character- vain and self centred - and found the book lacking any depth plus full of infuriating inconsistencies.
Profile Image for kittykat.
147 reviews2 followers
December 31, 2016
A light semi-enjoyable read if you can tolerate the self-centred and shallow nature of the main character. A few funny one liners and a predictable ending but I've read worse!
103 reviews4 followers
April 4, 2020
I was looking for a fun, easy read and I found it. A great world to distract oneself in.
Profile Image for Chloe.
1,258 reviews3 followers
August 5, 2020
A funny easy read about a first time mum struggling with motherhood and mother's group personalities. And then her mother-in-law comes to stay...
65 reviews
October 21, 2022
Books that are a satire on motherhood always end up with a massive cracking laugh and humorously toughed sequences. My most favourite genre after the mainstreams.
Profile Image for Glenys.
462 reviews5 followers
March 30, 2023
Quite an enjoyable book brought back memories of playgroup and motherhood.
Aly went from been a fashion PR exec to a stay at home mum, she had it all sussed - put someone in to her position at work who was hopeless and come back from maternity leave. Unfortunately things do not always go as planned, 10 weeks into maternity leave she heads to the office for lunch and to show of baby Coco, also will tell the boss she can come back early as she is not fitting in well at playgroup and misses everything that once was her whole world. Only to discover that relief hopeless person is going to be her new boss should she come back, tells the boss to stick it and leaves. Comes up with a Plan B to fit in as a stay at home mum... makes some great friends at playgroup, some faux pas also, but saves the day when the playgroup has to do a fundraiser to keep going.
94 reviews19 followers
May 18, 2015
First things first - I am not a mum, and I therefore feel as though this book was not targeted for me.

That being said, I did find it extremely easy to read, and lighthearted.

Unfortunately, I did not like the main character at all. I found her to be very selfish, materialistic and judgemental. Although I do believe this was potentially the aim of the character, so I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to respond to her???

I do think the stories told within about children and parenting are definitely relatable, I feel like this book would be enjoyed more by a new mum.

I received a free copy of this book through Goodreads First Reads.
Profile Image for Evelyn.
13 reviews4 followers
October 10, 2017
I was lucky enough to receive this book through Goodreads First Reads, so thank you to the author and Goodreads!

As a mother, I thought, hoped, I would at least find the book somewhat interesting. My hopes were more than met, as it is the type of book that keeps you wanting to read more.

It was easy to read, had me laughing out loud at some points (hilarious!), and had a great ending. I would love to see what else Georgia comes up with in the future.
99 reviews4 followers
January 2, 2016
Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum is the perfect entertaining, witty and amusing novel, and I found myself nodding along to some of the characters encountered and some of the scenarios described, meaning it was very relatable and relevant. It was devoured in a couple of days, although I was enjoying it so much I didn't want it to end!! Highly recommended, especially for a holiday read.

I received my copy as a Goodreads First Read - thanks Goodreads and Georgia Madden!
1 review1 follower
March 6, 2015
I devoured this book in a couple of sittings, nodding my head all the while at its very familiar characters and scenarios! Georgia Madden has a super-sharp wit and the social commentary buried just below the surface of the humour throughout this book is SPOT ON. I plan to buy my sister a copy of this book for her birthday. I know she'll enjoy it as much as I did.
71 reviews9 followers
August 28, 2015
I started this book in a reading slump and this book totally took me out of it. I loved the humour and wit of the main character and could totally relate to all the mummy moments. Such a great enjoyable read.

Full review: http://ausbooklover.blogspot.com.au/2...
Profile Image for Emma Mcdougall.
54 reviews1 follower
July 9, 2015
I enjoyed this, lately many "chick flick" books have failed to keep my attention and whilst this is still written to the same formula, it was well written and engaging. Best of all, I actually liked the characters, who weren't the complete parody of a "type" that I find so off putting in some books (there was some of that, but it wasn't completely grating and off putting)
Profile Image for Sarah.
34 reviews1 follower
April 27, 2015
I received this book from the publisher as part of the first reads give-away.

Offering an inside glimpse into the world of an ex PR executive, now a SAHM, Confessions of a Once Fashionable Mum was an enjoyable read.
Profile Image for Ellie.
Author 5 books103 followers
January 10, 2016
Great fun, brilliantly written novel. I laughed out loud many many times. I read this book with a new born in my arms and it was the perfect companion for late sleepless nights. Looking forward to whatever Georgia Madden produces next.
Profile Image for Alice.
15 reviews9 followers
July 20, 2016
Delightfully snarky.
Fun and witty.
Quick, light-hearted easy read.

**Book received for free through Goodreads First Reads**
Profile Image for Nerissa.
150 reviews
March 29, 2016
What a self indulgent spooky brat. I pity any child who has such pathetic all about parents. Trash.
Profile Image for Tiffany.
248 reviews
February 13, 2016
Entirely predictable but no less entertaining for it. Very funny and scarily accurate.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 31 reviews

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