Why Is Friendship Important?

Cultivating Biblical Godliness

by Michael A.G. Haykin, Joel R. Beeke

'Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend,' Proverbs 27:17 tells us. God uses Christian friendships to help His children grow in grace and stay true to Christ. But our twenty-first-century Western culture values individualism, busyness, and selfishness qualities that do not encourage deep, long-lasting, satisfying friendships. The authors guide us through a practical survey of biblical and historical friendships, drawing principles from them that will aid us in forming our own biblical friendships that will sharpen us for our Christian journey in a world that is no friend to grace. Table of Contents:
Friendship in the Holy Scriptures
Paul's Understanding of Friendship
Paul's Friendship with Timothy
Paul's Hunger for Companionship while Facing Death
Friendship in the Christian Tradition
John Calvin's Friendships
An Eighteenth-Century Friendship
Two Baptist Friends
The Art of Building Godly Friendships
Practical Steps Toward Deepening Friendship

The Cultivating Biblical Godliness booklets treat matters that are vital to Christian experience, and each contribution aims to address a wide variety of people and circumstances at a fundamental and introductory level. This includes teaching people what to believe in order to practice personal holiness as well as specific directions on how to cultivate biblical godliness in relation to issues that are common to God's people.

Genres: Christian Living, Christian

48 pages, Paperback

First published June 26, 2015

About the author

Dr. Michael A.G. Haykin is the Professor of Church History and Biblical Spirituality and Director of The Andrew Fuller Center for Baptist Studies at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary.

He is also the editor of Eusebeia: The Bulletin of The Andrew Fuller Center for Baptist Studies. His present areas of research include 18th-century British Baptist life and thought, as well as Patristic Trinitarianism and Baptist piety.

Haykin is a prolific writer having authored numerous books, over 250 articles and over 150 book reviews. He is also an accomplished editor with numerous editorial credits.

Reviews

[Gabe Mira · Rating 5 out of 5]

I got this book as a gift for someone else just because of the topic and not because I think that person needed help with developing biblical friendship. Now I see after reading that I myself needed encouragement and reminders from the truths of Scripture that permeate this little book of 46 pages which have reminded me of areas to grow in and repent of, all by God’s grace. Praise the Lord for friends and friendship with Him because of Jesus’ perfect life, death on the cross, burial, and resurrection on the third day to make that possible! Soli Deo Gloria.

[Cameron Barham]

“For the Christian, true friends are those with whom one can share the deepest things of life. They are people with whom one can be transparent and open.”, p. 17

[Jason]

This was a short book -- only 46 pages. Beeke and Haykin provide a brief overview of friendship in the Bible and throughout church history before providing a model of friendship levels and offering ten suggestions for cultivating friendships. In my opinion, the model and suggestions were the most helpful part of the book, although the quotes in the church history section were really good.

Their model involves five levels of friendship intimacy in concentric circles. On the outside of the circle are strangers. Then you have acquaintances, allies, companions, and confidants (p. 24).

The ten suggestions that Beeke and Haykin make for developing friendships are below (pp. 26-44).

1. Talk together

2. Listen together

3. Serve together

4. Enjoy life together

5. Think together

6. Be together

7. Trust together

8. Pray together

9. Repent together

10. Hope together

This book can be read in one sitting, but it's well worth spending a little time on.

[Catherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

“True friendship is first enkindled by a spark from heaven, and heaven will never suffer it to go out, but it will burn to all eternity.” —Esther Edwards Burr (daughter of Jonathan Edwards)

Nice, short book. Like the others in this series, a good fit for 3-4 lessons of a weekly study group.

[Todd Burgett · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great little book on a much needed topic - especially for Christian men.

[B · Rating 4 out of 5]

How Should We Develop Biblical Friendship? by Joel Beeke and Michael Haykin is part of the 12-booklet Cultivating Biblical Godliness series published by Reformation Heritage Books. This booklet is short at just 46 pages and looks at the Christian duty to develop biblical friendships.

I found this book to be very encouraging as I find myself in a new church home. The authors not only look at the art of building godly friendships, but also give practical steps toward deepening those friendships. In addition, they remind the Christian that "[a]s you strive to be a friend, you must recognize the mystery of how friendships come to pass. You cannot make someone be your faithful friend. God is Lord of friendship," (p. 22).

I recommend How Should We Develop Biblical Friendship? for all Christians. True biblical friendship is difficult to find in the frenzy of activities in most local churches. Truly close friends are few and far between, so cultivation of that true friendship is important. Beeke & Haykin quote Esther Edwards Burr to show the importance of the relationships we have here on earth: "True friendship is first enkindled by a spark from heaven, and heaven will never suffer it to go out, but it will burn to all eternity," (p. 11).

***
"Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind," (Phil. 2:2).

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

"We serve as guardians of each other's souls."

What a great book & a blessing!