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Painted Hearts #1
Twisted Needs
Anderson de Sousa
Anderson de Sousa has spent his entire life craving stability, devotion, and a place where he truly belongs. Unfortunately, he keeps searching for it in the worst possible place: Parker Morozov. No longer a kid, Anders still finds himself drawn to the one person who has always made him feel safe. But as lingering affection and blurred boundaries begin to spiral into something far more dangerous, he is forced to confront the terrifying reality of just how dangerous this dependency really is.
Parker Morozov
NHL captain Parker Morozov has adored his best friend’s younger brother since Anders was a young child. Parker has never been able to resist being needed, which is why he has never truly been able to let Anders go. Anders is no longer a child, though, and Parker is starting to look at him in a way he never should have in the first place. Now trapped between loyalty and longing, Parker is forced to confront the terrifying reality of what he has become to Anders and what Anders has become to him. After slowly losing his grip on the things he has spent his life controlling, Parker soon comes to the realization that walking away may no longer be possible.
Anderson de Sousa has spent his entire life craving stability, devotion, and a place where he truly belongs. Unfortunately, he keeps searching for it in the worst possible place: Parker Morozov. No longer a kid, Anders still finds himself drawn to the one person who has always made him feel safe. But as lingering affection and blurred boundaries begin to spiral into something far more dangerous, he is forced to confront the terrifying reality of just how dangerous this dependency really is.
Parker Morozov
NHL captain Parker Morozov has adored his best friend’s younger brother since Anders was a young child. Parker has never been able to resist being needed, which is why he has never truly been able to let Anders go. Anders is no longer a child, though, and Parker is starting to look at him in a way he never should have in the first place. Now trapped between loyalty and longing, Parker is forced to confront the terrifying reality of what he has become to Anders and what Anders has become to him. After slowly losing his grip on the things he has spent his life controlling, Parker soon comes to the realization that walking away may no longer be possible.
- GenresM M Romance
492 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 18, 2026
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Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
August 20, 2026
This being the first solid good romance I’ve read in a year among a flood of authors writing AI generated slop .. it’s just a cherry on top it’s m/m & taboo
tropes
m/m
Age gap 🔥
Older brothers best friend
Roommates
Possessive /JP 🫦
Taboo
So just Exacly how bad do you want an actual hero who’s in pain from yearning for a beloved boy he can’t have? ⬇️
I can’t breathe, Anders.” Parker’s voice breaks completely, reminding me exactly where I am and who I’m talking to. “I can’t fucking breathe.”
“Just stop.”
“Do you feel it?” he asks. “It feels like…” He lets out a shaky breath and chokes on air. “Something tied around your throat, and it’s so constricting. It’s so hard to breathe and it’s unbearable…”
“You are my air, Anderson.” He’s silent for a beat. “You’re the only thing I can’t seem to exist without.” Tears slide down my face and I don’t even bother wiping them away, because letting myself feel bad almost seems easier than pretending I don’t. “No matter how hard I try.” His voice drops lower. “Sertsu ne .”.. But I won’t let him move out. The thought of walking through my front door knowing Anders isn’t on the other side makes my chest hurt. I can’t live with that. I can’t..
ppl can fuck off with their “ possessiveness is a character flaw analogy bc your lying to my fucking face if you don’t think this is hot as fuck
.. “I lock eyes with Anders as I savagely suck on his three middle fingers, wetting them with my saliva before I guide them to his own mouth. His lips part wide as I drive his digits in, muttering “that’s good, sweetheart,” when he surrenders fully, letting me manipulate him in any way I want. “You’re doing so good. Just keep sucking for me.”
“Mine. The thoughts will never escape me at this point, and I want to shout it for the entire world to hear. He was never Luca’s. And I know that’s an insane thing to think about…but I’m not wrong. I know I’m not…and I don’t fucking care whatsoever about any kind of consequence. Not right now, at this very moment. I could never bring myself to care when I finally have exactly what I want.”
“Look up at me,” I murmur deeply, guiding his head up.
His eyes are bloodshot. His cheeks are stained with tears. There’s a cloudy mixture of cum and sweat and saliva running down his chin. And he’s never looked more perfect than he does at this very moment. Because he looks like he’s mine”
.
Is the age gap very problematic and slightly concerning at times given the nature of their relationship? Your damn fucking straight and bitch that’s half the fun when you get giddy over reading simp level behavior like this 🤗
.. The image of him sleeping peacefully in my arms flashes through my mind, making something warm settle deep in my heart. He’s always so content when he’s sleeping. Perfect. All I want to do is run my fingers through his soft hair and kiss the top of his head. I want to feel his heart beating and listen to the faint sleeping noises he makes when he’s more tired than usual.”
“His man. I’m his man. My heart beats a little too fast to process hearing those words. My body’s temperature hikes up a few degrees past the point of being comfortable. I’m dangerously close to needing an ice-cold shower. “My God, I miss you. I keep reaching for you in my sleep.”
“Do you?” Anders asks in a low, shaky voice. “You miss me?”
“So badly,” I whisper, unable to trust myself. “So fucking badly.”
.
he ain’t Your sugar daddy if he’s not hyping you up like this constantly that’s for fucking sure
. And there it is again. That thing he does. That impossible way he loves me through the things I love too. I’m sitting here wishing the season would end so I can get back to him faster, and he’s thinking about my teammates. About the guys who’ve spent their whole lives chasing the Cup. About everyone.
I don’t think I could build a better person in my head if I tried.”
..
tropes
m/m
Age gap 🔥
Older brothers best friend
Roommates
Possessive /JP 🫦
Taboo
So just Exacly how bad do you want an actual hero who’s in pain from yearning for a beloved boy he can’t have? ⬇️
I can’t breathe, Anders.” Parker’s voice breaks completely, reminding me exactly where I am and who I’m talking to. “I can’t fucking breathe.”
“Just stop.”
“Do you feel it?” he asks. “It feels like…” He lets out a shaky breath and chokes on air. “Something tied around your throat, and it’s so constricting. It’s so hard to breathe and it’s unbearable…”
“You are my air, Anderson.” He’s silent for a beat. “You’re the only thing I can’t seem to exist without.” Tears slide down my face and I don’t even bother wiping them away, because letting myself feel bad almost seems easier than pretending I don’t. “No matter how hard I try.” His voice drops lower. “Sertsu ne .”.. But I won’t let him move out. The thought of walking through my front door knowing Anders isn’t on the other side makes my chest hurt. I can’t live with that. I can’t..
ppl can fuck off with their “ possessiveness is a character flaw analogy bc your lying to my fucking face if you don’t think this is hot as fuck
.. “I lock eyes with Anders as I savagely suck on his three middle fingers, wetting them with my saliva before I guide them to his own mouth. His lips part wide as I drive his digits in, muttering “that’s good, sweetheart,” when he surrenders fully, letting me manipulate him in any way I want. “You’re doing so good. Just keep sucking for me.”
“Mine. The thoughts will never escape me at this point, and I want to shout it for the entire world to hear. He was never Luca’s. And I know that’s an insane thing to think about…but I’m not wrong. I know I’m not…and I don’t fucking care whatsoever about any kind of consequence. Not right now, at this very moment. I could never bring myself to care when I finally have exactly what I want.”
“Look up at me,” I murmur deeply, guiding his head up.
His eyes are bloodshot. His cheeks are stained with tears. There’s a cloudy mixture of cum and sweat and saliva running down his chin. And he’s never looked more perfect than he does at this very moment. Because he looks like he’s mine”
.
Is the age gap very problematic and slightly concerning at times given the nature of their relationship? Your damn fucking straight and bitch that’s half the fun when you get giddy over reading simp level behavior like this 🤗
.. The image of him sleeping peacefully in my arms flashes through my mind, making something warm settle deep in my heart. He’s always so content when he’s sleeping. Perfect. All I want to do is run my fingers through his soft hair and kiss the top of his head. I want to feel his heart beating and listen to the faint sleeping noises he makes when he’s more tired than usual.”
“His man. I’m his man. My heart beats a little too fast to process hearing those words. My body’s temperature hikes up a few degrees past the point of being comfortable. I’m dangerously close to needing an ice-cold shower. “My God, I miss you. I keep reaching for you in my sleep.”
“Do you?” Anders asks in a low, shaky voice. “You miss me?”
“So badly,” I whisper, unable to trust myself. “So fucking badly.”
.
he ain’t Your sugar daddy if he’s not hyping you up like this constantly that’s for fucking sure
. And there it is again. That thing he does. That impossible way he loves me through the things I love too. I’m sitting here wishing the season would end so I can get back to him faster, and he’s thinking about my teammates. About the guys who’ve spent their whole lives chasing the Cup. About everyone.
I don’t think I could build a better person in my head if I tried.”
..
August 20, 2026
Okay so I really enjoyed this book initially. A lot can be said for the first chapter in a book, but Twisted Needs had be hooked. I enjoyed the plot, the Dual POV and time lines — though in the beginning when it was changing from 2 years ago to 1 to 3 to then 5/4 months ago I got a little confused but after a few chapters it worked. I really liked the writing and pacing of this book and Anders character, however I really did not like Parker.
In the beginning I did, however after a while I did not. There’s nothing wrong with a character being protective and possessive in an age gap romance, but there were several moments where Parker just came across manipulative. Like SERIOUSLY manipulative, which I didn’t think went well with the age gap. Like there’s having flaws, but the age difference between Parker and Anders is significant and it went from Parker genuinely caring for Anders to seemingly use their age difference in a way to manipulate Anders.
I still read it through and even though I didn’t like Parker this won’t put me off reading any other books from the author, and I’m excited as to what will come next 🙂
In the beginning I did, however after a while I did not. There’s nothing wrong with a character being protective and possessive in an age gap romance, but there were several moments where Parker just came across manipulative. Like SERIOUSLY manipulative, which I didn’t think went well with the age gap. Like there’s having flaws, but the age difference between Parker and Anders is significant and it went from Parker genuinely caring for Anders to seemingly use their age difference in a way to manipulate Anders.
I still read it through and even though I didn’t like Parker this won’t put me off reading any other books from the author, and I’m excited as to what will come next 🙂
August 21, 2026
I audibly groan every time I see 5,4,3 months back and then 3 or 2 years back. Just tell the story in order 😩
I also hate Parker, he’s very manipulative.
I see why Parker is attracted to someone half his age because that matches his maturity level. 🙄
Parker also litters, he hates kids, calls them annoying, the list goes on. At least Anders isn’t a total pushover but he deserves more. If I finish this I’m gonna be pissed that he ends up with Parker.
And I’m done because talking about how much he’s grown during a sex scene is very off putting. The age gap is too weird.
Time of death: 53%
I also hate Parker, he’s very manipulative.
I see why Parker is attracted to someone half his age because that matches his maturity level. 🙄
Parker also litters, he hates kids, calls them annoying, the list goes on. At least Anders isn’t a total pushover but he deserves more. If I finish this I’m gonna be pissed that he ends up with Parker.
And I’m done because talking about how much he’s grown during a sex scene is very off putting. The age gap is too weird.
Time of death: 53%
August 19, 2026
I hardly ever DNF a book but this was all over the place. I really wanted to love it because I saw some videos on TikTok but unfortunately it just wasn’t for me.
August 19, 2026
This has climbed easily in TOP 5 of books i've read this year! The story was beautiful the spice was delicious. I love a good age-gap mm romance and this 100% delivered.
August 18, 2026
oh and she quoted heated rivalry hold up!!
oh and ex-fucking-cuse me we can not mention beautiful boy during sex.
oh how i loved this book.
was lowkey eating up the flashbacks.
parker always looking out for anders 🙁
like him always coming to get him when he calls and helping him with his migraines.
luca also hate to break it to you but you lowkey plotted them together when everytime anders did something you called parker.
luca and anders you made me cry.
luca you can’t say you would do it all over again even after what you two have been through.
oh and parker literally trying to buy anders forgiveness.
and finally giving him his dog 🙏
ugh i have no words i loved these two so much.
and parker PUT HIM DOWN!!
also why the fart was everyone treating anders like a kid like he is a grown man. let him sleep with who he wants yk.
even if that person happens to be his brother’s best friend who also happens to be 17 years older then him.
but who doesn’t love a good age gap (i know i sure do)
like luca your reaction was valid except when you made anders cry and realised he will always run to parker when he’s upset oop..
oh and luca you definitely don’t wanna know what happens in the bedroom.
like what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom 😏
oh and them adopting those three little muffins.
i knew they would.
lowkey knew it was vandy book next 🤫
maybe it’s about vandy and seth who knows?
i love how parker asked vandy to spy on anders like my man took his job super seriously even going home with seth so he didn’t go with anders hmm 🤨
oh and ex-fucking-cuse me we can not mention beautiful boy during sex.
oh how i loved this book.
was lowkey eating up the flashbacks.
parker always looking out for anders 🙁
like him always coming to get him when he calls and helping him with his migraines.
luca also hate to break it to you but you lowkey plotted them together when everytime anders did something you called parker.
luca and anders you made me cry.
luca you can’t say you would do it all over again even after what you two have been through.
oh and parker literally trying to buy anders forgiveness.
and finally giving him his dog 🙏
ugh i have no words i loved these two so much.
and parker PUT HIM DOWN!!
also why the fart was everyone treating anders like a kid like he is a grown man. let him sleep with who he wants yk.
even if that person happens to be his brother’s best friend who also happens to be 17 years older then him.
but who doesn’t love a good age gap (i know i sure do)
like luca your reaction was valid except when you made anders cry and realised he will always run to parker when he’s upset oop..
oh and luca you definitely don’t wanna know what happens in the bedroom.
like what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom 😏
oh and them adopting those three little muffins.
i knew they would.
lowkey knew it was vandy book next 🤫
maybe it’s about vandy and seth who knows?
i love how parker asked vandy to spy on anders like my man took his job super seriously even going home with seth so he didn’t go with anders hmm 🤨
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 20, 2026
Things definitely started out toxic between them but who doesn’t love an mmc who’s so super possessive! The banter, the tension, the age gap, the absolute love they’ve had for each other… give me moreeeeee. Anders finally finding a backbone and stopping Parker from continuing to be toxic, manipulating, hypocritical and on/off with him was amazingggg and exactly what was needed. Parker was down baddd for Anders just needed a slap to the face to get his act together. Sometimes things got weird when they talked about how he’s known him since he was a child… didn’t love that especially when they were in bed… but I digress because I really did enjoy reading this. Could’ve done without the whole he basically was there to raise him point though
Did Not Finish
August 19, 2026DNF @ 60% - Readers who enjoy possessive, toxic relationships might enjoy this one. For me, there's not enough going on to justify 400+ pages - I need more than just the relationship. The time-hopping was really not for me - give me a book in chronological order every time.
Review of advance copy
OH MY GOSH. I am still not over whatever the heck I just read.
I read this entire book in one sitting because I was physically incapable of putting it down. I don’t think I’ve ever read a story quite like Anders and Parker’s.
Parker is this morally gray hockey captain who is unable to confront his own feelings for his best friend’s younger brother. He’s watched Anders grow up and has become such an important person in his life, which is why he keeps telling himself he could never go too far with him (even though he still does). I have a feeling Parker was a lot more difficult to write than Anders, simply because his development is much more subtle. He doesn’t become a completely different person by the end. Instead, we see him change the way he approaches his relationship with Anders, and he finally learns how to truly consider Anders’ feelings. My favorite Parker moment in the book was when he broke down and actually let Anders comfort him because, up until that point, we’d only ever seen Parker be the one comforting Anders. It’s something small and simple, but it’s incredibly important because it shows he’s finally able to fully open up to him.
I LOVED Anders. He reminds me so much of myself with his family issues and the fact that he was so down bad for Parker for so long (I genuinely think Maudie Christin stole my diary).
Honestly, what moved me the most wasn’t even the romance. It was Anders’ relationship with his older brother, which was definitely a catalyst for Parker and Anders’ entire entanglement. Luca adopted Anders when he was young, so he’s both a parent and a brother at the same time. Their relationship felt so genuine because Anders was never fully able to open up to Luca the way he did with Luca’s wife and Parker. I think that’s a really realistic reflection of complicated family and parenting dynamics.
But back to Anders and Parker… It felt like this man was playing in Anders’ face for so long, and I’m obsessed with the fact that Anders eventually learned to put his foot down and stand up for himself. He’s hopelessly in love with Parker, but he gradually starts to realize that Parker is stringing him along in an unhealthy way. He makes the conscious decision to stop entertaining Parker’s advances, and that’s when Parker finally realizes he needs to stop toying with Anders’ feelings and get his shit together.
I love the two of them together because their relationship feels earned. Parker made the changes he needed to make, while Anders finally started prioritizing the things that truly mattered to him, especially his own happiness. I also really loved the way Parker cared for Anders when he had stress migraines and panic attacks. It shows how deeply Parker has always cared about him, and I think it’s important that the same level of care carried over into their romantic relationship.
The spice was UNMATCHED ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥 I liked how it started with a few spur-of-the-moment kisses, but the first spicy scene truly took their relationship beyond the point of no return. It made everything real for Parker, and it was really interesting to watch him struggle with coming to terms with his feelings.
I also loved seeing Parker learn to trust Anders enough for certain intimate moments. I haven’t read many age-gap romances where there weren’t rigid roles, so this was incredibly refreshing and honestly really reaffirming to see.
I really enjoyed Maudie Christin’s first release because it was such a fun read, but Twisted Needs was a completely different reading experience. It’s going to stick with me for a long time. I definitely cried way too many times while reading.
This is absolutely a book I would recommend to anyone who enjoys MM romance!
I read this entire book in one sitting because I was physically incapable of putting it down. I don’t think I’ve ever read a story quite like Anders and Parker’s.
Parker is this morally gray hockey captain who is unable to confront his own feelings for his best friend’s younger brother. He’s watched Anders grow up and has become such an important person in his life, which is why he keeps telling himself he could never go too far with him (even though he still does). I have a feeling Parker was a lot more difficult to write than Anders, simply because his development is much more subtle. He doesn’t become a completely different person by the end. Instead, we see him change the way he approaches his relationship with Anders, and he finally learns how to truly consider Anders’ feelings. My favorite Parker moment in the book was when he broke down and actually let Anders comfort him because, up until that point, we’d only ever seen Parker be the one comforting Anders. It’s something small and simple, but it’s incredibly important because it shows he’s finally able to fully open up to him.
I LOVED Anders. He reminds me so much of myself with his family issues and the fact that he was so down bad for Parker for so long (I genuinely think Maudie Christin stole my diary).
Honestly, what moved me the most wasn’t even the romance. It was Anders’ relationship with his older brother, which was definitely a catalyst for Parker and Anders’ entire entanglement. Luca adopted Anders when he was young, so he’s both a parent and a brother at the same time. Their relationship felt so genuine because Anders was never fully able to open up to Luca the way he did with Luca’s wife and Parker. I think that’s a really realistic reflection of complicated family and parenting dynamics.
But back to Anders and Parker… It felt like this man was playing in Anders’ face for so long, and I’m obsessed with the fact that Anders eventually learned to put his foot down and stand up for himself. He’s hopelessly in love with Parker, but he gradually starts to realize that Parker is stringing him along in an unhealthy way. He makes the conscious decision to stop entertaining Parker’s advances, and that’s when Parker finally realizes he needs to stop toying with Anders’ feelings and get his shit together.
I love the two of them together because their relationship feels earned. Parker made the changes he needed to make, while Anders finally started prioritizing the things that truly mattered to him, especially his own happiness. I also really loved the way Parker cared for Anders when he had stress migraines and panic attacks. It shows how deeply Parker has always cared about him, and I think it’s important that the same level of care carried over into their romantic relationship.
The spice was UNMATCHED ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥 I liked how it started with a few spur-of-the-moment kisses, but the first spicy scene truly took their relationship beyond the point of no return. It made everything real for Parker, and it was really interesting to watch him struggle with coming to terms with his feelings.
I also loved seeing Parker learn to trust Anders enough for certain intimate moments. I haven’t read many age-gap romances where there weren’t rigid roles, so this was incredibly refreshing and honestly really reaffirming to see.
I really enjoyed Maudie Christin’s first release because it was such a fun read, but Twisted Needs was a completely different reading experience. It’s going to stick with me for a long time. I definitely cried way too many times while reading.
This is absolutely a book I would recommend to anyone who enjoys MM romance!
Review of advance copy received from Author
I got the opportunity to beta read this book my first ever I’ve seen so many clippings on TikTok or instagram and knew I would love this book and I wasn’t wrong AT all! This book truly had everything the push and pull with anders and Parker there will be so many moments will you will be mad because you just want them to give in! Most of the time the pull comes from Parker he’s older it’s his best friends little brother who he basically has watched him grow up so it’s a grey area and when Luca asks him to not go there with his brother he takes it serious for as long as he can
What Parker doesn’t realize is how much he needs Anders as he needs him it’s like air the push and the pull is there but Parker admits he can’t breathe properly without anders being home!
The spice ooooooh maaaam other than the few stolen kisses that Parker takes back you are waiting for that first spice scene and when I tell you that it was damn worth it! Trust because it makes up for it! Howeverr chapter 48 that is it that is all LOL
The emotions are there because Anders feels like Parker gives him a bone then immediately takes it back but once Parker knows he can’t be without anders he makes him prove it earn it and grovel which was chefs kiss!
One moment that made me cry was when Parker read Anders short story he wrote about Parker when he was 19 he got to see all the emotions that Anders had when he wanted Parker so bad when it was about more than just lust and when Parker was crying realizing how he treated Anders; Anders was the one who comforted him!
I love how we can feel how much Anders feels for Parker through the authors words we can feel that when Parker pushes him away the sadness and how his migraines come on
So the biggest hurdle for them absolutely was Luca it’s Parker’s best friend and Anders brother so we know this confrontation is coming and it happens in a way you don’t expect
Of course him and Anders yell they have their own issues because Luca adopted him and Anders always felt like he had to earn Luca’s love and I think Luca was scared of losing him to Parker but their conversation when they finally got all their feelings out just healed something
Luca and Parker was a different story and I was about to fight if Luca used the grooming word but it was so far from that and it made me laugh when Luca just punched him to make Luca feel better!
The epilogues because the book wasn’t enough that last epilogue made my heart freaking soar!!
Also the nicknames! Didn’t mind the daddy comments at all! The sweetheart! Anders calling him Pet’ka! Also the lace maaaaam!
Some favourite quotes
Be my Parker not his
Sometimes I want things that aren’t really mine park
You’re my air Anderson, you’re the only thing I can’t seem to live without
Being together we harm nobody being apart we extinguish ourselves
What Parker doesn’t realize is how much he needs Anders as he needs him it’s like air the push and the pull is there but Parker admits he can’t breathe properly without anders being home!
The spice ooooooh maaaam other than the few stolen kisses that Parker takes back you are waiting for that first spice scene and when I tell you that it was damn worth it! Trust because it makes up for it! Howeverr chapter 48 that is it that is all LOL
The emotions are there because Anders feels like Parker gives him a bone then immediately takes it back but once Parker knows he can’t be without anders he makes him prove it earn it and grovel which was chefs kiss!
One moment that made me cry was when Parker read Anders short story he wrote about Parker when he was 19 he got to see all the emotions that Anders had when he wanted Parker so bad when it was about more than just lust and when Parker was crying realizing how he treated Anders; Anders was the one who comforted him!
I love how we can feel how much Anders feels for Parker through the authors words we can feel that when Parker pushes him away the sadness and how his migraines come on
So the biggest hurdle for them absolutely was Luca it’s Parker’s best friend and Anders brother so we know this confrontation is coming and it happens in a way you don’t expect
Of course him and Anders yell they have their own issues because Luca adopted him and Anders always felt like he had to earn Luca’s love and I think Luca was scared of losing him to Parker but their conversation when they finally got all their feelings out just healed something
Luca and Parker was a different story and I was about to fight if Luca used the grooming word but it was so far from that and it made me laugh when Luca just punched him to make Luca feel better!
The epilogues because the book wasn’t enough that last epilogue made my heart freaking soar!!
Also the nicknames! Didn’t mind the daddy comments at all! The sweetheart! Anders calling him Pet’ka! Also the lace maaaaam!
Some favourite quotes
Be my Parker not his
Sometimes I want things that aren’t really mine park
You’re my air Anderson, you’re the only thing I can’t seem to live without
Being together we harm nobody being apart we extinguish ourselves
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 22, 2026
This book is about a fully grown man grooming a child and the results of it coming to fruition in adulthood.
DNF’d at 44% bc I actually couldn’t cope with the emotional abuse. All the time jumps that were so inconsistent in actually keeping up with themselves I think the author got confused and started writing about something that happened four months ago in a flashback chapter and in a present time chapter put it as having happened only yesterday.
There’s a lot of things that I can criticise this book for one being the time jumps that even seem to confuse themselves in the timeline but the entire premise of this book is Parker rooming and us as a child and then as an adult continuing the controlling be.
I’m all for romance I love a Rina Kent, specifically some of her darker works like Kiss The Villain are exactly what I love and what I rate highly but this is not it.
At least in a lot of dark romances there is actually genuine loving care for someone that comes from a place of ill advised intentions. But in this book this is literally just a man who has groomed his best friend‘s little brother who has a 17 year age gap and now he’s a legal adult. Parker continuously tries to gaslight Anders into thinking that every time Parker kisses him or does something to him, it’s actually Ander’s fault.
I saw this book on TikTok and I think the author has done a great job of promoting it but this is possibly one of those relationships where it’s not a justifiable kind of toxic where you can find something good to latch onto from it. It is just a toxic where there is nothing that is actually objectively real love in there. Anything that could possibly be considered loving this book between these two characters is entirely tainted by Parker’s constant need to control. Anders is clearly a boy in need of a lot of healing and Parker just constantly holds things over him and uses things against him which is just so emotionally abusive but it’s not even in the realm of dark romance. It’s literally just abuse. There’s a lot of lines cross just in the 44% that I read and I’m actually disappointed that there was no progress in it just seems to continuously be a lot of emotional abuse, a lot of emotional manipulation and a lot of holding something over someone else’s with a massive Power imbalance.
DNF’d at 44% bc I actually couldn’t cope with the emotional abuse. All the time jumps that were so inconsistent in actually keeping up with themselves I think the author got confused and started writing about something that happened four months ago in a flashback chapter and in a present time chapter put it as having happened only yesterday.
There’s a lot of things that I can criticise this book for one being the time jumps that even seem to confuse themselves in the timeline but the entire premise of this book is Parker rooming and us as a child and then as an adult continuing the controlling be.
I’m all for romance I love a Rina Kent, specifically some of her darker works like Kiss The Villain are exactly what I love and what I rate highly but this is not it.
At least in a lot of dark romances there is actually genuine loving care for someone that comes from a place of ill advised intentions. But in this book this is literally just a man who has groomed his best friend‘s little brother who has a 17 year age gap and now he’s a legal adult. Parker continuously tries to gaslight Anders into thinking that every time Parker kisses him or does something to him, it’s actually Ander’s fault.
I saw this book on TikTok and I think the author has done a great job of promoting it but this is possibly one of those relationships where it’s not a justifiable kind of toxic where you can find something good to latch onto from it. It is just a toxic where there is nothing that is actually objectively real love in there. Anything that could possibly be considered loving this book between these two characters is entirely tainted by Parker’s constant need to control. Anders is clearly a boy in need of a lot of healing and Parker just constantly holds things over him and uses things against him which is just so emotionally abusive but it’s not even in the realm of dark romance. It’s literally just abuse. There’s a lot of lines cross just in the 44% that I read and I’m actually disappointed that there was no progress in it just seems to continuously be a lot of emotional abuse, a lot of emotional manipulation and a lot of holding something over someone else’s with a massive Power imbalance.
Review of advance copy received from Author
Overall, this felt like a big step up in emotional depth and intensity compared to the author’s previous work. It is messy, addictive, and definitely not a light read, but it completely delivered and hit every mark where I expected it to.
This book completely pulled me in. The emotional tension between the characters is constant in the best way, and it really builds this push and pull dynamic that keeps you hooked the entire time.
What stood out most for me was how unsimple everything felt. The story does not just focus on romance, it digs into unconventional family dynamics, long term emotional baggage, and the way unresolved feelings can shape every interaction between people who are already deeply connected. That added a lot of weight to every scene and made even the quieter moments feel really intense.
There is also a surprising amount of angst woven throughout the book. It honestly had my skin crawling in the best way because of how drawn out and emotionally loaded everything felt.
The spice also deserves its own mention. It was much more detailed and graphic than expected, and a lot more intense than what Christin has written before.
I would 100% recommend this book, and I would definitely rate it six stars if possible. It was just such an unexpected jump in performance for this author and I think their writing was approached with a lot more intention in this regard.
This book completely pulled me in. The emotional tension between the characters is constant in the best way, and it really builds this push and pull dynamic that keeps you hooked the entire time.
What stood out most for me was how unsimple everything felt. The story does not just focus on romance, it digs into unconventional family dynamics, long term emotional baggage, and the way unresolved feelings can shape every interaction between people who are already deeply connected. That added a lot of weight to every scene and made even the quieter moments feel really intense.
There is also a surprising amount of angst woven throughout the book. It honestly had my skin crawling in the best way because of how drawn out and emotionally loaded everything felt.
The spice also deserves its own mention. It was much more detailed and graphic than expected, and a lot more intense than what Christin has written before.
I would 100% recommend this book, and I would definitely rate it six stars if possible. It was just such an unexpected jump in performance for this author and I think their writing was approached with a lot more intention in this regard.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Review of advance copy received from Author
10/10
LOVE IT. BUY IT. CROSSING MY LEGS AND BLUSHING (but also crying)
Maudie Christin there is something insanely wrong with you. I’m convinced you were watching yk what while writing those spicy scenes bc… HOLY MOLY. Can I also just say, this book exceeded my expectations.
Anders and Parker are one of those couples where the world is convinced they don’t make any sense. Parker not only is almost 20 years older than Anders, but he’s known him his entire life. I did not know what to expect going into this, especially with the prologue starting off as a flashback to when Anders was like 8 or 9. And then it jumped to Anders being 21 and it’s very clear that he is NOT a child anymore. It immediately left me wanting to know how the hell they got to that point, and I think the pacing and the dual POVs really provided the perfect context and jumping from a past timeline to a present day one filled in the rest.
The progression of this couple was genuinely enjoyable to watch, and I really liked that they didn’t feel too stereotypical in their roles. Parker and Anders have known each other for a very long time, and you can 100% tell from the way they’re so comfortable with each other.
I think the ending was also really satisfying, and I like how there were two separate epilogues that show what their life is like after the final chapter. I loved this book so much and I’m so excited to see what Maudie will give us next!
LOVE IT. BUY IT. CROSSING MY LEGS AND BLUSHING (but also crying)
Maudie Christin there is something insanely wrong with you. I’m convinced you were watching yk what while writing those spicy scenes bc… HOLY MOLY. Can I also just say, this book exceeded my expectations.
Anders and Parker are one of those couples where the world is convinced they don’t make any sense. Parker not only is almost 20 years older than Anders, but he’s known him his entire life. I did not know what to expect going into this, especially with the prologue starting off as a flashback to when Anders was like 8 or 9. And then it jumped to Anders being 21 and it’s very clear that he is NOT a child anymore. It immediately left me wanting to know how the hell they got to that point, and I think the pacing and the dual POVs really provided the perfect context and jumping from a past timeline to a present day one filled in the rest.
The progression of this couple was genuinely enjoyable to watch, and I really liked that they didn’t feel too stereotypical in their roles. Parker and Anders have known each other for a very long time, and you can 100% tell from the way they’re so comfortable with each other.
I think the ending was also really satisfying, and I like how there were two separate epilogues that show what their life is like after the final chapter. I loved this book so much and I’m so excited to see what Maudie will give us next!
August 20, 2026
TRULY terrible. One of the most groomy, creepy, disgusto age gaps I’ve ever read. I truly feel bad for Anders. Parker needs to be investigated. He basically helped raise this kid his whole life (while he is 18 years older than him) and then does all this?? I was trying to ignore all the times Parker would call Anders some version of “little boy” or “my sweet precious boy”, but I finally had to DNF when Parker was thinking about how he raised and shaped Anders. Even goes so far as to say, “Wondering how much of the man in my arms would still exist if I’d never been there. Wondering how much of him I taught. How much of him I influenced. How much of him became what he is because, for better or worse, I was always somewhere nearby.” WHAT????
August 21, 2026
Me gustó el libro, excelentes personajes,la historia,la escenas Hot me encantaron, lo unico me fuera gustado que Parker fuera sufrido más , porque Ander paso mal años, incluso cuando sabían los sentimientos uno sobre otro pero por "respeto" al hermano parker lo dejaba, la tuvo muy fácil de regreso, de verdad me costó conciliar el final de juntos como si nada, tuve un resentimiento ,cuando hablaban de las ETS dijo que había estado 2 veces con algo, yo dije: no, en verdad esto en un juego para el, si ander lo fuera dejando esperando mas y seguramnete fuera salido con otra 2 veces que no fueron "nada", me fuera gustado que ander se fuera dado su lugar un poco mas
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 20, 2026
The time line so so confusing.
Parker? No thanks ✋🏼
WillMack reference in the book? Girlll
Also plot holes like crazy??? Like wym Anders doesn’t choose any of his actual post grad offers? Idk this book was all over the place
Parker? No thanks ✋🏼
WillMack reference in the book? Girlll
Also plot holes like crazy??? Like wym Anders doesn’t choose any of his actual post grad offers? Idk this book was all over the place
August 21, 2026
I’m obsessed with this book
I wish I was a better writer so I could better express how much I loved this book. It made me laugh, it made me cry, and it was written with exceedingly fantastic spice. Please read this book!
I wish I was a better writer so I could better express how much I loved this book. It made me laugh, it made me cry, and it was written with exceedingly fantastic spice. Please read this book!
August 19, 2026
This has all my favorite tropes! Does anyone have any book recommendations that are similar? (Went to bed at 5 am because of this book🫣)
August 20, 2026
FILTHY and in need of an editor 😂
August 22, 2026
Great representation of Borderline Personality Disorder!!!
Review of advance copy received from Author
⭐️ REVIEW OF THE ARC VERSION ⭐️
How to start? Go read it.
Anders & Parker’s relationship is the one that will get your heart beating fast. Either from angst Either from sweetness Either from lust.
They know each other since forever.
Parker has always been Anders’ safe place but it slowly evolved to something more. To Anders’ whole world.
Parker’s boundaries for a status quo on their friendship were useless the second they kissed for the first time.
what I love:
- The 17 years age gap
- Parker unfair possessivity
- Parker claiming Anders was his even though he refused to start anything
- Anders telling him to F*** off & calling him out on his attitude
- Anders’ pain (sorry but yes us hurting bc of Parker’s actions made the next chapter way more worth it)
- The occasional banter
- The epilogue
⭐️ REVIEW OF THE BETA VERSION ⭐️
The book got me giggling, melting, blushing, butterflying (not a word? Fits the feeling though).
It’s an age gap of 17 years
He is his brother’s best friend.
They are toxic.
They are manipulative, gaslighting and oh living together.
Bc Parker has a spare room & Anders needs a place to stay.
The chemistry between them is out the charts.
The pining, the yearning, the repeated heartbreaks. Damn those boys took us on a roller coaster!
Of course Anders is a brat
Of course Parker can’t help himself and act like an immature kid when it comes to Anders.
And yet they are perfect for each others!
How to start? Go read it.
Anders & Parker’s relationship is the one that will get your heart beating fast. Either from angst Either from sweetness Either from lust.
They know each other since forever.
Parker has always been Anders’ safe place but it slowly evolved to something more. To Anders’ whole world.
Parker’s boundaries for a status quo on their friendship were useless the second they kissed for the first time.
what I love:
- The 17 years age gap
- Parker unfair possessivity
- Parker claiming Anders was his even though he refused to start anything
- Anders telling him to F*** off & calling him out on his attitude
- Anders’ pain (sorry but yes us hurting bc of Parker’s actions made the next chapter way more worth it)
- The occasional banter
- The epilogue
⭐️ REVIEW OF THE BETA VERSION ⭐️
The book got me giggling, melting, blushing, butterflying (not a word? Fits the feeling though).
It’s an age gap of 17 years
He is his brother’s best friend.
They are toxic.
They are manipulative, gaslighting and oh living together.
Bc Parker has a spare room & Anders needs a place to stay.
The chemistry between them is out the charts.
The pining, the yearning, the repeated heartbreaks. Damn those boys took us on a roller coaster!
Of course Anders is a brat
Of course Parker can’t help himself and act like an immature kid when it comes to Anders.
And yet they are perfect for each others!
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