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The Queen and Mrs Thatcher: An Inconvenient Relationship
This is the remarkable story of how the two most powerful women in Britain at the time met and disliked each other on sight. For over a decade they quietly waged a war against each other on both a personal and political stage, disagreeing on key issues including sanctions against South Africa, the Miners' Strike and allowing US planes to bomb Libya using UK military bases. Elizabeth found the means to snub and undermine her prime minister through petty class put-downs and a series of press leaks. Margaret attacked her monarch by sidelining her internationally, upstaging her at home and allowing the Murdoch press to crucify the royal family. This book is a window into the 1980s, an era when Britain was changed beyond recognition by a woman who made 'Thatcherism' the defining word of the decade.
383 pages, Kindle Edition
First published June 1, 2015
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667 people want to read
About the author
Dean Palmer
29 books5 followersDean Palmer works as a television producer and executive. He has produced documentary and factual programmes for Netflix, NBC-Universal, Sony Pictures, the BBC, ITV and Channel 4. His first book, The Queen and Mrs Thatcher: An Inconvenient Relationship, attracted front-page headlines. His second book, Tea with Hitler: The Secret History of the Royal Family and the Third Reich was published in May 2021.
'Devastatingly persuasive in its forensic detail, a brilliant new book's deeply troubling accusation.'
THE DAILY MAIL on TEA WITH HITLER (24 April 2021).
'Devastatingly persuasive in its forensic detail, a brilliant new book's deeply troubling accusation.'
THE DAILY MAIL on TEA WITH HITLER (24 April 2021).
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Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
September 1, 2015
I won an ARC of this book via the GoodReads First Reads programme. This review in its entirety was originally posted at eclectictales.com: http://www.eclectictales.com/blog/201...
I couldn’t put this book down once I started reading it. Setting up the premise of these two women coming from opposite ends of the class spectrum but in positions of power was fascinating and it was interesting to read how their relationship devolved after that fateful first meeting. It’s astonishing to think that, being one of the few women in power and sharing some similar struggles and opinions, they would quite dislike each other and do little to advance the role of women in the public sphere (but as their biographies note, their upbringing and experiences lent little for them to promote the role of women during the 80s). It was also fascinating to read to what extent they actually waged their little war against each other, from old-fashioned snobbery to actively sidelining them publically to enlisting the media for support. It was very strange, really, but the contrasts were also interesting to examine.
The set-up of the book was devised in a way that allowed the author’s argument points to flow through logically but still in keeping with major events that happened chronologically over the course of the 1980s. There’s a bit of back-and-forth at times, especially when it came to these women’s private lives, and there was a bit of repetition that was quite noticeable but otherwise it was a very interesting argument to follow. A word on the publication: short as this book was, I wished they had increased the size of the font a wee bit. It’s a little smaller than standard, and while I can read with small font, it does make the text seem overwhelming at times.
The Queen and Mrs. Thatcher overall was an interesting look at the queen and prime minister’s frosty relationship (to put it mildly) over the course of the 1980s and how it played out in the political scene. I learned a lot along the way, perhaps because events were conveyed in a precise manner, about the rise of the media and the unspoken rules when it comes to interacting with the monarchy. Readers of non-fiction who are interested in the British monarchy, British politics, and the current events of the 1980s will want to check out this book.
I couldn’t put this book down once I started reading it. Setting up the premise of these two women coming from opposite ends of the class spectrum but in positions of power was fascinating and it was interesting to read how their relationship devolved after that fateful first meeting. It’s astonishing to think that, being one of the few women in power and sharing some similar struggles and opinions, they would quite dislike each other and do little to advance the role of women in the public sphere (but as their biographies note, their upbringing and experiences lent little for them to promote the role of women during the 80s). It was also fascinating to read to what extent they actually waged their little war against each other, from old-fashioned snobbery to actively sidelining them publically to enlisting the media for support. It was very strange, really, but the contrasts were also interesting to examine.
The set-up of the book was devised in a way that allowed the author’s argument points to flow through logically but still in keeping with major events that happened chronologically over the course of the 1980s. There’s a bit of back-and-forth at times, especially when it came to these women’s private lives, and there was a bit of repetition that was quite noticeable but otherwise it was a very interesting argument to follow. A word on the publication: short as this book was, I wished they had increased the size of the font a wee bit. It’s a little smaller than standard, and while I can read with small font, it does make the text seem overwhelming at times.
The Queen and Mrs. Thatcher overall was an interesting look at the queen and prime minister’s frosty relationship (to put it mildly) over the course of the 1980s and how it played out in the political scene. I learned a lot along the way, perhaps because events were conveyed in a precise manner, about the rise of the media and the unspoken rules when it comes to interacting with the monarchy. Readers of non-fiction who are interested in the British monarchy, British politics, and the current events of the 1980s will want to check out this book.
December 3, 2015
I received this book as part of a goodreads giveaway.
I absolutely loved this book. Growing up, Margaret Thatcher was a role model for me. I saw her as "The Iron Lady", who stood up and fought for what she believed in, but I never considered what her relationship to The Queen had been like. Learning that these two women did not like each other, and at times had a hard time even tolerating each other was interesting. They couldn't have come from more different backgrounds, but they both believed in the same thing-service to country. They encountered many of the same problems, most notably with their children, with whom they had strained relationships, most likely from the sacrifices their mothers made for the sake of their careers.
I was afraid that, as an American, I would be unfamiliar with a lot of the people mentioned in the book, but surprisingly, there weren't that many, and those specific details were not important to follow the story.
The author does an excellent job of portraying an unbiased account of the "Thatcher years". There is no biased shown to either lady. Mistakes, successes, and character flaws are all presented in a manner that gives us a more well rounded account of both women and the struggles they faced.
I highly recommend this book for anyone interested in politics, international relations, the history of England, or biographies. Mr. Palmer has sparked an even deeper interest in me to read more about this era and these women.
I absolutely loved this book. Growing up, Margaret Thatcher was a role model for me. I saw her as "The Iron Lady", who stood up and fought for what she believed in, but I never considered what her relationship to The Queen had been like. Learning that these two women did not like each other, and at times had a hard time even tolerating each other was interesting. They couldn't have come from more different backgrounds, but they both believed in the same thing-service to country. They encountered many of the same problems, most notably with their children, with whom they had strained relationships, most likely from the sacrifices their mothers made for the sake of their careers.
I was afraid that, as an American, I would be unfamiliar with a lot of the people mentioned in the book, but surprisingly, there weren't that many, and those specific details were not important to follow the story.
The author does an excellent job of portraying an unbiased account of the "Thatcher years". There is no biased shown to either lady. Mistakes, successes, and character flaws are all presented in a manner that gives us a more well rounded account of both women and the struggles they faced.
I highly recommend this book for anyone interested in politics, international relations, the history of England, or biographies. Mr. Palmer has sparked an even deeper interest in me to read more about this era and these women.
June 14, 2015
Really enjoyed this book, I know the author, so I was being extra critical but was pleasantly surprised and actually read it all in a weekend. If you like non fictional/semi biographical book I would recommend, not overly political - ideal holiday book.
January 27, 2024
I must confess that I picked up this book only after watching an episode of The Crown depicting Margaret Thatcher's awkward first visit to Balmoral Castle. In that episode, Mrs Thatcher was shown committing a number of faux pas with the royal family, clearly awkward and ill at ease in their leisurely world of hunting, highland sports and parlour games; the royal family were in turn unimpressed by her workaholic tendencies, lack of humour, and unenthusiasm for their pursuits, making a number of snide comments behind her back.
My prior impression of Mrs Thatcher, based on what little I knew, was that she was an imposing Iron Lady who was both revered and reviled in her country for her toughness, so it surprised me to see her vulnerabilities and insecurities being portrayed. I was further intrigued to find out from a quick Google search that Mrs Thatcher reportedly had a strained relationship with the Queen, and my curiosity was piqued by this to find out more about the dynamics between this pair who were arguably once the two most powerful women in the UK.
"The Queen and Mrs Thatcher: An Inconvenient Relationship" provided just what I was looking for - it delves into the factors and circumstances which led to the tension between the two women, and details the key incidents which shaped their relationship, such as the Falklands War and their disagreement on whether to impose economic sanctions on South Africa. What I found most fascinating was the author's attempts to highlight the many similarities between the two women despite the vastly different social backgrounds they came from. Unlike the Queen who was born into a world of privilege and aristocracy, Mrs Thatcher was a humble grocer's daughter who had to fight class prejudice and work her way relentlessly to the top. Their differences in upbringing in turn shaped their differing world views and opinions of what was best for Britain's interests. Yet despite these differences, there were many remarkable similarities between the two: both were "Daddy's girls" whose fathers had a profound influence over their values and beliefs; both ostensibly preferred working with men and distrusted women in power (quite ironically!); and both were inept at motherhood, being cold and distant to their less favoured children and overindulgent with their preferred ones, resulting in both having favourite sons who displayed wayward behaviour in adulthood.
While I found this an interesting read, I think the book could have done with better writing and editing; besides the fact that there were a number glaring typos and missing/incorrect words, I found the recounting of political events rather dense and difficult to follow at times. It struck me too that the author didn't seem particularly fond of both his subjects, often focusing on their negative attributes or choosing to interpret events/actions in a manner which put them in an unflattering light. That said, he did try to acknowledge their achievements and strengths where warranted. My key takeaway was that both the Queen and Mrs Thatcher, like all humans, were not saints, and waged a quiet war with each other, but both ultimately shared an important commonality: a great love and deep sense of duty towards their country.
My prior impression of Mrs Thatcher, based on what little I knew, was that she was an imposing Iron Lady who was both revered and reviled in her country for her toughness, so it surprised me to see her vulnerabilities and insecurities being portrayed. I was further intrigued to find out from a quick Google search that Mrs Thatcher reportedly had a strained relationship with the Queen, and my curiosity was piqued by this to find out more about the dynamics between this pair who were arguably once the two most powerful women in the UK.
"The Queen and Mrs Thatcher: An Inconvenient Relationship" provided just what I was looking for - it delves into the factors and circumstances which led to the tension between the two women, and details the key incidents which shaped their relationship, such as the Falklands War and their disagreement on whether to impose economic sanctions on South Africa. What I found most fascinating was the author's attempts to highlight the many similarities between the two women despite the vastly different social backgrounds they came from. Unlike the Queen who was born into a world of privilege and aristocracy, Mrs Thatcher was a humble grocer's daughter who had to fight class prejudice and work her way relentlessly to the top. Their differences in upbringing in turn shaped their differing world views and opinions of what was best for Britain's interests. Yet despite these differences, there were many remarkable similarities between the two: both were "Daddy's girls" whose fathers had a profound influence over their values and beliefs; both ostensibly preferred working with men and distrusted women in power (quite ironically!); and both were inept at motherhood, being cold and distant to their less favoured children and overindulgent with their preferred ones, resulting in both having favourite sons who displayed wayward behaviour in adulthood.
While I found this an interesting read, I think the book could have done with better writing and editing; besides the fact that there were a number glaring typos and missing/incorrect words, I found the recounting of political events rather dense and difficult to follow at times. It struck me too that the author didn't seem particularly fond of both his subjects, often focusing on their negative attributes or choosing to interpret events/actions in a manner which put them in an unflattering light. That said, he did try to acknowledge their achievements and strengths where warranted. My key takeaway was that both the Queen and Mrs Thatcher, like all humans, were not saints, and waged a quiet war with each other, but both ultimately shared an important commonality: a great love and deep sense of duty towards their country.
August 13, 2015
Very entertaining and informative. You're transported back to the 1980s. These were radical times. Politics has become dull.
Margaret Thatcher shook things up for everyone, including the old school tie brigade at Buckingham Palace. It was clearly a shock for the Queen who must have been relieved when John Major took over. The Queen preferred a 'One Nation' approach.
The chapters covering Michael Shea's press leak and Thatcher's visits to Balmoral are the most interesting. I also enjoyed chapter on motherhood which revealed some interesting parallels - Prince Andrew / Mark Thatcher.
Good pictures of Mrs T's deep curtsies to royalty, including Princess Diana.
Margaret Thatcher shook things up for everyone, including the old school tie brigade at Buckingham Palace. It was clearly a shock for the Queen who must have been relieved when John Major took over. The Queen preferred a 'One Nation' approach.
The chapters covering Michael Shea's press leak and Thatcher's visits to Balmoral are the most interesting. I also enjoyed chapter on motherhood which revealed some interesting parallels - Prince Andrew / Mark Thatcher.
Good pictures of Mrs T's deep curtsies to royalty, including Princess Diana.
September 16, 2015
I too really enjoyed this book and thought it was very well written. It kept my interest throughout. You might think you know all you would wish to know about these two iconic women but Dean Palmer manages to find new information and it's the juxtaposition of their two lives and circumstances in such an interesting time that proves so fascinating. Plus, he adds something about the Queen's relationship with subsequent PMs. I wonder what she'll make of Jeremy Corbyn! And, whatever you think about Mrs Thatcher, her story is fascinating and made me see her slightly differently. I look forward to his next book.
January 14, 2021
An excellently written insight into not just the relationship between these two formidable women but also their separate background that in some ways made them more alike than they may have realised.
There's also some delicious humour such as when Baroness Thatcher as she was then arrived at a function attended by many bluebloods and aristocrats of the London social scene. Lady Annabel Goldsmith nudged her companion as she approached and whispered to him, "For God's sake don't let me curtsy. That's what I did last time!"
There's also some delicious humour such as when Baroness Thatcher as she was then arrived at a function attended by many bluebloods and aristocrats of the London social scene. Lady Annabel Goldsmith nudged her companion as she approached and whispered to him, "For God's sake don't let me curtsy. That's what I did last time!"
January 4, 2021
Whilst this book does not reveal anything new about either woman, it does put forward an interesting narrative of how they interacted with each other, whilst confirming the judgement most people with knowledge of the kind of person Mrs Thatcher was & The Queen is would make - whilst they did not get on very well, largely because of their polar opposite backgrounds, and despite the fact they often briefed against each other in the press, they each had a begrudging yet stoic respect for the other.
June 26, 2017
A good account of the relationship and lives of these two women. However, I was disappointed that he did not include Glenda Jackson's speech in the House of Commons following Lady Thatcher's death.
November 30, 2020
Thoroughly enjoyed this read and is a great “deep dive” into the Queen and Thatcher’s relationship following its depiction in Season 4 of The Crown.
July 31, 2023
Very insightful and showed me a different side to events I grew up with.
March 27, 2024
Two powerful women in Britain at the time in the 1980's there must have been a lot of men that wanted to take on the job thinking women can not run a country, I don't agree with thatcher but she did do some good for this country, but I feel power went to her head
February 21, 2017
A truly fascinating book for anyone who remembers Thatcher's 'reign'. These two women could not have been more different in every possible sense apart from the fact that they were both quite useless mothers. Neither comes out of the book well and you are unlikely to change the opinions you hold of either woman. That aside the book covers all the major events of that time and there is an awful lot of fascinating information and insight here. The references alone cover 37 pages. Mostly though I realise how brilliant 'Spitting Image' was and how brilliantly it portrayed both as the book summed up the Queen was always trying to annoy Thatcher who in turn was trying to get everyone to call her ma'am.
August 11, 2015
I received this book from Goodreads' First Reads program.
To be perfectly honest, prior to reading this book, I had little knowledge of Margaret Thatcher's reign as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. I only had slightly more knowledge of the royal family, but I've never really cared about what the monarchs did (except for that time Harry wore a Nazi uniform...but hey, I find stupidity fascinating).
I didn't come to the book without any prior knowledge or feelings, though. I knew that Reagan and Thatcher were closely aligned politically, and my own political sympathies are very much in line with theirs, so I expected that I would appreciate Thatcher and respect her as a political leader very much. And I did.
For somebody who has received so much love and criticism, with very little middle ground, I was hesitant to dive into a book about her so soon after her death. I was worried that she would either be totally lionized or that the author would use the book as a screed against her. Fortunately, Palmer did neither of those things, and kept his treatment of the subject very even-handed, not sparing Thatcher when she deserved to be criticized, but also recognizing the extraordinary things she accomplished.
Based on the title of the book and the description, I was expecting more discussion of fighting (either overt or behind the scenes) between the two powerful women. Unfortunately, much of Palmer's book read like Plutarch's Lives (which is not a compliment), with a short biography of a particular part of one woman's life, followed by a short biography of that same part of the other woman's life, with a very short follow-up about the similarities and differences.
It may be that there just wasn't enough to write a book about the "inconvenient relationship" between Thatcher and the Queen without doing that. But I was hoping to find out more about the Queen's role in the operations of government, of which she is both a symbolic and integral part.
Finally, the copy I received did not indicate that it was an ARC. However, there were far too many grammatical errors, uses of the wrong word, essential words that had been left out. Hopefully Mr. Palmer or his editor have caught these and made corrections to them, because I found them to be very distracting.
To be perfectly honest, prior to reading this book, I had little knowledge of Margaret Thatcher's reign as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. I only had slightly more knowledge of the royal family, but I've never really cared about what the monarchs did (except for that time Harry wore a Nazi uniform...but hey, I find stupidity fascinating).
I didn't come to the book without any prior knowledge or feelings, though. I knew that Reagan and Thatcher were closely aligned politically, and my own political sympathies are very much in line with theirs, so I expected that I would appreciate Thatcher and respect her as a political leader very much. And I did.
For somebody who has received so much love and criticism, with very little middle ground, I was hesitant to dive into a book about her so soon after her death. I was worried that she would either be totally lionized or that the author would use the book as a screed against her. Fortunately, Palmer did neither of those things, and kept his treatment of the subject very even-handed, not sparing Thatcher when she deserved to be criticized, but also recognizing the extraordinary things she accomplished.
Based on the title of the book and the description, I was expecting more discussion of fighting (either overt or behind the scenes) between the two powerful women. Unfortunately, much of Palmer's book read like Plutarch's Lives (which is not a compliment), with a short biography of a particular part of one woman's life, followed by a short biography of that same part of the other woman's life, with a very short follow-up about the similarities and differences.
It may be that there just wasn't enough to write a book about the "inconvenient relationship" between Thatcher and the Queen without doing that. But I was hoping to find out more about the Queen's role in the operations of government, of which she is both a symbolic and integral part.
Finally, the copy I received did not indicate that it was an ARC. However, there were far too many grammatical errors, uses of the wrong word, essential words that had been left out. Hopefully Mr. Palmer or his editor have caught these and made corrections to them, because I found them to be very distracting.
January 18, 2017
An honest and critical exploration of the troubled relationship between Margeret Thatcher and the Queen in the Eighties. Dean Palmer makes full use of newly released materials to shed light on this era, such as memos to their aides, Thatcher's correspondence with her her son and most importantly memos behind the leak to The Sunday Times, when the Queen's Press Secretary expressed her dislike of Thatcher.
More than anything 'An Inconvenient Relationship' shows us how Margaret Thatcher created a monarchical image for herself as part of her political identity and how the Queen responded to the challenges this presented to her own image. There are some intriguing moments mentioned; such as the efforts Thatcher made to upstage the royal family, ensuring she was first on the scene to the Lockerbie disaster and the site of The Herald of Free Enterprises sinking off the Belgian coast.
But perhaps the most revealing and fascinating aspect of this relationship was the role of Rupert Murdoch. Palmer carefully traces the dealings Thatcher had with Murdoch at a time when he was forming the type of shamesless media we all too willingly accept today. His use of salacious stories on the royal family to further Thatcherism went a long way and did much damage. Thatcher may have died, but the Murdoch she created lives on. I would love to see Dean Palmer take this subject on!
More than anything 'An Inconvenient Relationship' shows us how Margaret Thatcher created a monarchical image for herself as part of her political identity and how the Queen responded to the challenges this presented to her own image. There are some intriguing moments mentioned; such as the efforts Thatcher made to upstage the royal family, ensuring she was first on the scene to the Lockerbie disaster and the site of The Herald of Free Enterprises sinking off the Belgian coast.
But perhaps the most revealing and fascinating aspect of this relationship was the role of Rupert Murdoch. Palmer carefully traces the dealings Thatcher had with Murdoch at a time when he was forming the type of shamesless media we all too willingly accept today. His use of salacious stories on the royal family to further Thatcherism went a long way and did much damage. Thatcher may have died, but the Murdoch she created lives on. I would love to see Dean Palmer take this subject on!
January 1, 2017
This started off with an interesting comparison of the upbringings of the two women, and the book was an easy skim through the British life in the 1980s. Unfortunately, there were lots of irritations, such as the pretty basic explanations of relationships between members of the royal family, and lots of repeating old tabloid scandals. The author tried many varied names for the two women hoping to avoid confusing and repetitive use of "she" and "her", but they quite often just grated, especially "Elizabeth Windsor". The chapters that told how the women were both terrible mothers, and of the Queen's relationships with other prime ministers after Mrs Thatcher seemed like padding at the end.
July 14, 2016
I finished this book on the day another new female Prime Minister "kissed hands". Palmer doesn't appear to like either the Queen or Thatcher very much, so he is able to be objective. There are interesting details here in the contrasts and parallels between them. Both experienced poor parenting and turned into poor parents themselves, for instance. Neither woman comes out of this very well.
June 27, 2023
interesting and gave a comprehensive overview of the relationship between the two women
slow going at points and jumped around time frames with little warning
slow going at points and jumped around time frames with little warning
April 15, 2017
An interesting curio about two powerful women who really did not see eye to eye . Much is made of the fact that both revered their fathers rather than their mothers and that the blocks that powerful women put in her way may have accounted for thatchers disdain for feminism .Part of this is the age old debate between continuity and change ; other questions , such as the dilemma over sheltering the Shah of Iran , the Blunt affair etc Are less straightforward as are the question of economic sanctions against South Africa . Less savoury is the relationship Thatcher built with the Murdoch press which left a blind eye turned to his savaging of the royals - though I am neither strongly for or against the monarchy I loathe Murdoch ; the dependence that thatcher Blair and Cameron felt on him for election success stains democracy , his attitude to the hitler diaries shows an attitude that entertainment matters more than truth , his hounding of the royals is distasteful whether you like them or not and his crocodile tears over phone hacking nauseating . It's interesting that the queen felt more at ease with John Major who Thatcher frequently undermined . In the end the monarchy was rejuvenated but at the cost of sharp lessons - the book goes to discuss the part played by Blair in the handling of Diana's death - While Thatcher inevitably lost power as politicians do, her hubris seemingly undoing the strong role she had played .
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews