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The Art of People: 11 Simple People Skills That Will Get You Everything You Want
What does it take to win success and influence?
Some people think that in today’s hyper-competitive world, it’s the tough, take-no-prisoners type who comes out on top. But in reality, argues New York Times bestselling author Dave Kerpen, it’s actually those with the best people skills who win the day. Those who build the right relationships. Those who truly understand and connect with their colleagues, their customers, their partners. Those who can teach, lead, and inspire.
In a world where we are constantly connected, and social media has become the primary way we communicate, the key to getting ahead is being the person others like, respect, and trust. Because no matter who you are or what profession you're in, success is contingent less on what you can do for yourself, but on what other people are willing to do for you. Here, through 53 bite-sized, easy-to-execute, and often counterintuitive tips, you’ll learn to master the 11 People Skills that will get you more of what you want at work, at home, and in life. For example, you’ll
· The single most important question you can ever ask to win attention in a meeting
· The one simple key to networking that nobody talks about
· How to remain top of mind for thousands of people, everyday
· Why it usually pays to be the one to give the bad news
· How to blow off the right people
· And why, when in doubt, buy him a Bonsai
A book best described as “ How to Win Friends and Influence People for today’s world,” The Art of People shows how to charm and win over anyone to be more successful at work and outside of it.
Some people think that in today’s hyper-competitive world, it’s the tough, take-no-prisoners type who comes out on top. But in reality, argues New York Times bestselling author Dave Kerpen, it’s actually those with the best people skills who win the day. Those who build the right relationships. Those who truly understand and connect with their colleagues, their customers, their partners. Those who can teach, lead, and inspire.
In a world where we are constantly connected, and social media has become the primary way we communicate, the key to getting ahead is being the person others like, respect, and trust. Because no matter who you are or what profession you're in, success is contingent less on what you can do for yourself, but on what other people are willing to do for you. Here, through 53 bite-sized, easy-to-execute, and often counterintuitive tips, you’ll learn to master the 11 People Skills that will get you more of what you want at work, at home, and in life. For example, you’ll
· The single most important question you can ever ask to win attention in a meeting
· The one simple key to networking that nobody talks about
· How to remain top of mind for thousands of people, everyday
· Why it usually pays to be the one to give the bad news
· How to blow off the right people
· And why, when in doubt, buy him a Bonsai
A book best described as “ How to Win Friends and Influence People for today’s world,” The Art of People shows how to charm and win over anyone to be more successful at work and outside of it.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published March 15, 2016
603 people are currently reading
4562 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 195 reviews
January 8, 2017
Disappointing. I bought The Art of People because of reviews describing it as How to Win Friends and Influence People updated for the age of social media. However, I was disappointed.
Even though there are genuinely good chapters, the book is nowhere near as good as Dale Carnegie’s classic book on people skills. One reason for this (I think) is that Dale Carnegie gave classes for years, if not decades, and heard personal stories from thousands of people on what worked and didn’t work. He was able to draw from all of these stories when writing How to Win Friends and Influence People. Dave Kerpen on the other hand is using only his own experience of dealing with people, and that doesn’t have the same impact.
Another reason I didn’t like this book much is that some of the advice and stories come across as quite shallow. For example, chapter 6 advices to have signature style, like always wearing orange shoes, as a way to get noticed when networking. In chapter 26, “You Never Get What You Don’t Ask For”, the author describes how they wanted a big wedding, but couldn’t afford one. So they organized sponsors (1-800-flowers.com, Smirnoff etc) and had it at a baseball stadium (“it generated about $20 million in earned media”). To some this may sound great, but to me it just feels like selling out.
Also, in several chapters (for example chapter 29) he talks about networking on social media. The problem is that his approach is so indiscriminate. He writes that he will promote anybody on Twitter that tweets him. When you promote anything, I feel that it cheapens the endorsement, even though it might get you extra followers on Twitter, or more connections on LinkedIn.
Another problem I have with some of the advice is that it worked for him, but that doesn’t mean that it will work for others. In the story of the orange shoes, he ended up connecting with influential venture capitalist. I am not sure that universal lessons can be drawn from this event. Ditto for chapter 43, “Let Go to Get What You Want”, where he could not get involved with a woman because she was married. As it turned out, they got together years later, and are now married, but again I am not sure you can count on “getting what you want” by letting go (even though letting go was the right thing to do).
Each chapter ends with First Action Steps to Take. In some cases these steps make sense, but mostly they are just summaries of the chapter made to look like actions to take, and that was a bit annoying. The first chapter refers to a personality test called Enneagram (“much better than Myers-Briggs”) that is included in an appendix. I did the test, but I don’t think it was any better or worse than Myer-Briggs. It also doesn’t figure in the rest of the book, so it felt a little out of place. In another appendix, there are inspirational quotes on a variety of subjects. I like his idea of being “unoriginal”, i.e. using good quotes instead of trying to express an idea yourself, and I love great quotes, but I found a lot of these quotes oddly bland.
All this said, there were parts of the book that I really liked. Chapters 15 and 16 on being heard and validating are great, as are chapters 39 and 47 on gratitude. I also think his advice on transparency and authenticity (particularly in social media) is spot on. Almost all chapters feature a personal story, and those make the book better and more memorable.
However, if you are looking for the next How to Win Friends and Influence People, I think you will be disappointed. I would recommend reading (or re-reading) that classic instead of getting this one. As for the advice on social media, I recommend reading Deep Work by Cal Newport for an alternative view on what to concentrate on.
Even though there are genuinely good chapters, the book is nowhere near as good as Dale Carnegie’s classic book on people skills. One reason for this (I think) is that Dale Carnegie gave classes for years, if not decades, and heard personal stories from thousands of people on what worked and didn’t work. He was able to draw from all of these stories when writing How to Win Friends and Influence People. Dave Kerpen on the other hand is using only his own experience of dealing with people, and that doesn’t have the same impact.
Another reason I didn’t like this book much is that some of the advice and stories come across as quite shallow. For example, chapter 6 advices to have signature style, like always wearing orange shoes, as a way to get noticed when networking. In chapter 26, “You Never Get What You Don’t Ask For”, the author describes how they wanted a big wedding, but couldn’t afford one. So they organized sponsors (1-800-flowers.com, Smirnoff etc) and had it at a baseball stadium (“it generated about $20 million in earned media”). To some this may sound great, but to me it just feels like selling out.
Also, in several chapters (for example chapter 29) he talks about networking on social media. The problem is that his approach is so indiscriminate. He writes that he will promote anybody on Twitter that tweets him. When you promote anything, I feel that it cheapens the endorsement, even though it might get you extra followers on Twitter, or more connections on LinkedIn.
Another problem I have with some of the advice is that it worked for him, but that doesn’t mean that it will work for others. In the story of the orange shoes, he ended up connecting with influential venture capitalist. I am not sure that universal lessons can be drawn from this event. Ditto for chapter 43, “Let Go to Get What You Want”, where he could not get involved with a woman because she was married. As it turned out, they got together years later, and are now married, but again I am not sure you can count on “getting what you want” by letting go (even though letting go was the right thing to do).
Each chapter ends with First Action Steps to Take. In some cases these steps make sense, but mostly they are just summaries of the chapter made to look like actions to take, and that was a bit annoying. The first chapter refers to a personality test called Enneagram (“much better than Myers-Briggs”) that is included in an appendix. I did the test, but I don’t think it was any better or worse than Myer-Briggs. It also doesn’t figure in the rest of the book, so it felt a little out of place. In another appendix, there are inspirational quotes on a variety of subjects. I like his idea of being “unoriginal”, i.e. using good quotes instead of trying to express an idea yourself, and I love great quotes, but I found a lot of these quotes oddly bland.
All this said, there were parts of the book that I really liked. Chapters 15 and 16 on being heard and validating are great, as are chapters 39 and 47 on gratitude. I also think his advice on transparency and authenticity (particularly in social media) is spot on. Almost all chapters feature a personal story, and those make the book better and more memorable.
However, if you are looking for the next How to Win Friends and Influence People, I think you will be disappointed. I would recommend reading (or re-reading) that classic instead of getting this one. As for the advice on social media, I recommend reading Deep Work by Cal Newport for an alternative view on what to concentrate on.
October 10, 2016
Nothing very original, Dave Kerpen just rehashes older books. Be nice to people, put yourself in their shoes, show your vulnerability, stand out visually, blah blah blah...
July 17, 2016
This book is a mirror into the author's approach of how he tries to manipulate and influence those around him. More importantly, it's an attempt to convince the reader that he, himself, is influential. Name dropping, etc.
Being likable can't be taught.
If you want to "act" like your likable, then follow the advice.
Unfortunately, the author makes claims that are unsubstantiated.
Whatever is good, is quoted.
Being likable can't be taught.
If you want to "act" like your likable, then follow the advice.
Unfortunately, the author makes claims that are unsubstantiated.
Whatever is good, is quoted.
March 28, 2016
I received this book for free.
Good points:
*I believe the author is easy to communicate with; listing of his email address is provided in the introduction. His Twitter and LinkedIn are listed as well.
Not so good points:
*I started the self-assessment in the appendix but didn't feel that the questions pertained to me. The ratings would be off, therefore, the advice would be off.
*Appendix B lists a few pages of inspirational quotes. I never believe these without the context listed. These are shaped to fit the situation; waste of paper as hey do not deliver the message home.
Maybe I'm just not one for self-help books:
In glancing at the book, I start to cringe. I'd rather be reading fiction or a published study. This just seems like fluff. I begin to feel it is cult-like/pyramid scheme; time to run away from the book.
The examples feel made up, petty. Number 42: Let Cooler Heads Prevail. He had an argument with his young daughter and wife over Clue board game.
I can't support this book as something to buy, if you must read it, check it out at your local library.
Good points:
*I believe the author is easy to communicate with; listing of his email address is provided in the introduction. His Twitter and LinkedIn are listed as well.
Not so good points:
*I started the self-assessment in the appendix but didn't feel that the questions pertained to me. The ratings would be off, therefore, the advice would be off.
*Appendix B lists a few pages of inspirational quotes. I never believe these without the context listed. These are shaped to fit the situation; waste of paper as hey do not deliver the message home.
Maybe I'm just not one for self-help books:
In glancing at the book, I start to cringe. I'd rather be reading fiction or a published study. This just seems like fluff. I begin to feel it is cult-like/pyramid scheme; time to run away from the book.
The examples feel made up, petty. Number 42: Let Cooler Heads Prevail. He had an argument with his young daughter and wife over Clue board game.
I can't support this book as something to buy, if you must read it, check it out at your local library.
January 9, 2018
Not really worth a read! In fact I don't really wish to justify it by doing an extensive review.
Picked up the book at the airport based on the title -The Art of People. Kept reading through thinking I would find something insightful in the later halves of the book. None whatsoever. Feels like a hipster manual of how to self promote.
Picked up the book at the airport based on the title -The Art of People. Kept reading through thinking I would find something insightful in the later halves of the book. None whatsoever. Feels like a hipster manual of how to self promote.
February 10, 2019
I picked up this book at the airport on my way to Ireland for a holiday. As I started reading I quickly found out that you had to do an enneagram test before continuing. Since I didn't really have much time to take a test properly I decided to read this book later and saved it as a good start for the new year. New year, new things learned!
This book has been nothing but a disappointment after I finished taking the tests. One of them is inside the book itself and will give you some insight into what type of person you are. This was the coolest thing about the book. Then there was another test you had to take, but it was online. It was only ten multiple choice questions, so why I had to go online to do a test is beyond me. They could have just included the test inside this book.
I went on reading thinking we would actually be doing something with the test results, but this never happened. Never. It was such a huge letdown for me, because I was hoping to really learn something from this book.
Trudging through chapter after chapter of this autobiography, which it basically is, was not fun. There were so many things that I didn't like about the book. The tone of voice, the overall very American point of view on business. And when Dave Kerpen was giving tips, he always ended it with something benign like "Be genuine when you say something to someone! You have to really mean it, or otherwise it won't work!" Yeah, no shit Sherlock. People don't like fakers...
The more I read of this garbage the more I found myself disagreeing with Dave Kerpen. The only thing I agreed with is that you have to actively listen to people and don't listen with the intent on giving an answer. People just want to be heard and they will often think you're a great person if you just listen. Well, I didn't really need this book to know that.
I think the biggest problem with this book, however, is that it's all based on Dave's personal experiences, with little to none scientific or research based evidence to support his claims. This makes it all seem biased. What works for him, won't work for me most of the time. Especially since Dutch people have a fundamentally different business ethic and are much more direct than Americans. Something they often see as being blunt.
The lesson learned from this book can be summarised as: "Be nice and people will treat you nice."
There, I just saved you a tenner.
The best thing about this book is probably its smell, which I give a solid 🌟🌟🌟🌟. Otherwise, steer clear of this book. It won't teach you anything new if you're a genuine, listening human being.
Final score:
Print/lettering: 🌟🌟🌟🌟
Paper smell: 🌟🌟🌟🌟
Originality: 🌟
Information: 🌟
Overall: 🌟
This book has been nothing but a disappointment after I finished taking the tests. One of them is inside the book itself and will give you some insight into what type of person you are. This was the coolest thing about the book. Then there was another test you had to take, but it was online. It was only ten multiple choice questions, so why I had to go online to do a test is beyond me. They could have just included the test inside this book.
I went on reading thinking we would actually be doing something with the test results, but this never happened. Never. It was such a huge letdown for me, because I was hoping to really learn something from this book.
Trudging through chapter after chapter of this autobiography, which it basically is, was not fun. There were so many things that I didn't like about the book. The tone of voice, the overall very American point of view on business. And when Dave Kerpen was giving tips, he always ended it with something benign like "Be genuine when you say something to someone! You have to really mean it, or otherwise it won't work!" Yeah, no shit Sherlock. People don't like fakers...
The more I read of this garbage the more I found myself disagreeing with Dave Kerpen. The only thing I agreed with is that you have to actively listen to people and don't listen with the intent on giving an answer. People just want to be heard and they will often think you're a great person if you just listen. Well, I didn't really need this book to know that.
I think the biggest problem with this book, however, is that it's all based on Dave's personal experiences, with little to none scientific or research based evidence to support his claims. This makes it all seem biased. What works for him, won't work for me most of the time. Especially since Dutch people have a fundamentally different business ethic and are much more direct than Americans. Something they often see as being blunt.
The lesson learned from this book can be summarised as: "Be nice and people will treat you nice."
There, I just saved you a tenner.
The best thing about this book is probably its smell, which I give a solid 🌟🌟🌟🌟. Otherwise, steer clear of this book. It won't teach you anything new if you're a genuine, listening human being.
Final score:
Print/lettering: 🌟🌟🌟🌟
Paper smell: 🌟🌟🌟🌟
Originality: 🌟
Information: 🌟
Overall: 🌟
August 3, 2018
It was a OK book. Seems like it was inspired by Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" because the author quoted from the book more than 3 times earlier. A lot of valuable easy to put on practice gems but the thing I dislike about this book is the constant repetition of similar sentence/points in subsequent paragraphs with slight paraphrase presence in almost all chapters. And I also thought that the ex-gf story shouldn't be included at all. It's cringey.
November 16, 2015
A great modern take on How to Win Friends and Influence People, this book is filled with easy to read and remember and implement tips to work better with others and be a better leader. Now when people ask "how are you?" I know to answer "fantastic!" and should I ever need to send a gift to a CEO who has everything, I know exactly what to buy.
February 15, 2016
Great easy to read book about how to improve interactions with people. Although it's geared towards business interactions, most tips can be applied to any personal relationships at well. The First Actions Steps to Take (FAST) are create reflective and starting points the implement the material covered in the chapter.
Received as a Goodreads Giveaway.
Received as a Goodreads Giveaway.
January 9, 2017
While the title is very enticing, the content is rather dull. The descriptions are very general and the stories are banal. If you want to learn something while being put to sleep, this book is a good option. Or you might just read the first few pages and skim the rest of the book, just as I did.
December 28, 2017
I haven't really read enough of these pseudo-pychological tracts to know if this was any worse or better than others. It gave some, what I thought to be, common sense advice on getting along with people, largely within a business setting. This ranged from pretty shallow suggestions, eg buy your contacts a gift, so even if they can't help you they might buy someone who can, to quite sound advice, eg empower everyone in the team to feel like a leader and play to their strengths - hardly rocket science though! On reflection the technique for doing the latter though, which was to have a large number of 'vice-president job titles, seems very patronizing and presumably it wouldn't take a very astute employee too long to recognise that they were being pacified with the equivalent of a kid's sticker chart. The concluding remarks were apparently whirls of genius from the author's wife's mouth, rather than the author himself (Apparently a reality TV Celebrity who I hadn't heard of) "Meet the right people, listen well, connect and inspire them, and they'll want to give them everything you want." seems such a truism it is barely worth stating. OK, it is becoming apparent I didn't think a great deal of this text. In a time when there seems an excess of life changing self-help literature out there, I would say that this texts uniqueness lies in the fact that it really isn't.
May 28, 2023
อ่านได้เพลินๆ เราชอบบทแรกๆที่อ่านเนื้อหาแล้วรู้สึกว่าได้ทริค และมุมมองใหม่ๆ แต่พออ่านไปเรื่อยๆ มันออกแนวฮาวทูในแบบที่ไม่ค่อยถูกจริตกับเรา คือยกตัวอย่างสถานการณ์แล้วสรุปข้อคิดวิธีการที่ได้จากเหตุการณ์นั้นๆเป็นข้อๆ (บางคนอาจจะชอบสไตล์นี้) สิ่งที่ชอบคือลททดสอบบุคลิกภาพที่แนบมาด้านหลัง ให้เข้าใจตัวเอง และข้อดีข้อเสียของบุคลิกประเภทนั้นๆ
September 27, 2023
Fantastic
March 20, 2016
I really enjoyed “The Art Of People: 11 Simple People Skills That Will Get You Everything You Want” by Dave Kerpen. It's written in a friendly and conversational manner, and filled with solid advice on dealing with people. Maybe the reason I enjoyed it so much is that I teach a lot of similar things in some of my workshops. And while some may think the advice is “common sense,” I've found that common sense isn't commonly practiced. This book is a great reminder that there are simple people skills that not only will help you get what you want, but make life and interactions with others a lot more pleasurable.
The eleven people skills include: Understanding Yourself and Understanding People, Meeting the Right People, Reading People, Connecting with People, Influencing People, Changing People's Minds, Teaching People, Leading People, Resolving Conflict with People, Inspiring People, and Keeping People Happy. Each of these eleven topics has several chapters with lessons to help you achieve the goals of the section.
I must say again, this is simple stuff, certainly not rocket science, but if you actually apply these lessons you will be amazed at how better your life can be. Even though I teach similar lessons, I had a few “ah ha” moments when reading. I also got the feeling that Kerpen is honest, genuine, and someone I'd like to get to know.
Unless you are living in the mountains as a hermit, you have to communicate and deal with people. It only makes sense that the better you are at dealing with people, the better your life will be. Learn and practice these people skills that Dave Kerpen shares and you will be on the way to a happier life and getting everything you want. Highly recommended.
The eleven people skills include: Understanding Yourself and Understanding People, Meeting the Right People, Reading People, Connecting with People, Influencing People, Changing People's Minds, Teaching People, Leading People, Resolving Conflict with People, Inspiring People, and Keeping People Happy. Each of these eleven topics has several chapters with lessons to help you achieve the goals of the section.
I must say again, this is simple stuff, certainly not rocket science, but if you actually apply these lessons you will be amazed at how better your life can be. Even though I teach similar lessons, I had a few “ah ha” moments when reading. I also got the feeling that Kerpen is honest, genuine, and someone I'd like to get to know.
Unless you are living in the mountains as a hermit, you have to communicate and deal with people. It only makes sense that the better you are at dealing with people, the better your life will be. Learn and practice these people skills that Dave Kerpen shares and you will be on the way to a happier life and getting everything you want. Highly recommended.
November 14, 2018
Super lightweight and fluffy. Almost nothing in this book is original. The construction of each chapter is in the style of those annoying as all hell LinkedIn posts that start with some attention-grabbing quote or dilemma, then go on to deliver a mundane piece of advice such as "praise in public, criticize in private" or "offer a feedback sandwich: a positive piece of feedback, a critical piece, then a positive piece of feedback." Wow, deep.
Also found the title distasteful because it implies relationships are about getting "everything you want." This isn't by accident ... the tips feel manipulative and focused on selfish goals, rather than on establishing healthy relationships.
This is 90% shallow stuff. There are far better books on this topic. Keep searching.
Also found the title distasteful because it implies relationships are about getting "everything you want." This isn't by accident ... the tips feel manipulative and focused on selfish goals, rather than on establishing healthy relationships.
This is 90% shallow stuff. There are far better books on this topic. Keep searching.
December 5, 2016
Pretty basic stuff that has been covered in other books. If you are looking for something truly innovative, look elsewhere. If this is your first book in this genre and you are looking for soehing introductory then this is a good start. I felt Kerpen spent a lot of time on his stories as a type-A, overachiever and the corresponding issues associated with that.
July 15, 2016
I enjoyed this, quick read, good advice.
December 28, 2016
There were some helpful pieces of advice, most of which I would think people know. I could be wrong on that though.
April 15, 2019
Really interesting tips to becoming a better person and friend
June 16, 2019
Even though it was a good book overall and had some good thoughts and perspectives, it took me a month ti read it and there were a few things I really disliked about it.
During first 100 pages or so, I had a very strong feeling if author trying to teach and tell how to effectively use other people for your selfish needs, and I personally am completely against it, so...
Another thing that bugged me was the feeling of author trying to show off how amazing he is and how succesfully he manipulates and uses people for his good. He shared a ton of interesting stories from his personal life, but at some point I felt like it was a book about him rather than a book teaching people how to communicate with others better.
Okay, later it was kinda fine and towards the end I even considered giving it 4 stars, UNTIL! Until in the end author was talking about content creation and basically said something like "Of course you can be original when creating a content, but WHY do it, if you can just use other entertaining content people will like. Creating original content just takes a lot of time."
Like WHAT?? Of course you should be original when creating a content! Yes, there are tons of good and popular pages who just share funny videos or inspirational quotes, but why even bother to post anything if you can't be creative and original? Where is the fun??
So yeah, these 3 things just made me give this book 3 stars. Again, as I said before, it was a fine book and had some good advise, so if you are into non-fiction, you would probably enjoy it.
During first 100 pages or so, I had a very strong feeling if author trying to teach and tell how to effectively use other people for your selfish needs, and I personally am completely against it, so...
Another thing that bugged me was the feeling of author trying to show off how amazing he is and how succesfully he manipulates and uses people for his good. He shared a ton of interesting stories from his personal life, but at some point I felt like it was a book about him rather than a book teaching people how to communicate with others better.
Okay, later it was kinda fine and towards the end I even considered giving it 4 stars, UNTIL! Until in the end author was talking about content creation and basically said something like "Of course you can be original when creating a content, but WHY do it, if you can just use other entertaining content people will like. Creating original content just takes a lot of time."
Like WHAT?? Of course you should be original when creating a content! Yes, there are tons of good and popular pages who just share funny videos or inspirational quotes, but why even bother to post anything if you can't be creative and original? Where is the fun??
So yeah, these 3 things just made me give this book 3 stars. Again, as I said before, it was a fine book and had some good advise, so if you are into non-fiction, you would probably enjoy it.
June 16, 2024
Lettlest og informativ
December 23, 2022
Well written book with real world examples. Definitely worth the read.
March 13, 2016
A suggested by the title this is a collection of suggestions about how to improve your influence over the outcomes of your interpersonal interactions, both personal and professional. The book is quite detail oriented and covers 53 individual techniques. For the most part, most are common sense but as a collection, they comprise a nice review and synopsis. Sample topics include, don't try to resolve disputes when angry, create a structured path for resolution, positive grateful people create better environments and more positive people, listen to and validate the concerns of others, offer unconditional help, networking in the internet age, praise in public, criticize in private, personalize your thank-yous, etc. The overriding theme is take care of the needs of others and your needs will reciprocally be resolved. If they are not, then you have made a friend. The structure of the book is in short 2-5 page chapters with large font excerpts in which each suggestion/tool is described and illustrated in practical examples. Then a 3-4 step action plan is provided to practice until the technique becomes second nature. As pointed out at least once, there is a fine line here between authentic concern and manipulation. However, I suspect that the insincere practitioners would become obvious rather quickly (my opinion).
There were a few things with which I disagree. The author suggested that (foolish IMO) people who leave their social media sites wide open are more trustworthy than (wise IMO) people who restrict access to their personal sections. He also puts a great deal more stock than I do in social media like Twitter and Linked-In. Of course he is in that business. For me this was not an absorbing read and I struggled to keep going at times. I am retired and typically complete books in 2-3 days, this one took me 17 days on and off. My final caveat is that these are the author's opinions based on his personal experiences and those of his colleagues in the self-help industry. Thus, there is no attempt to quantify efficacy of the individual methods.
Overall I suspect this would be useful read for twenty somethings starting out and a reasonable reference/review for the more seasoned worker. However, considering the fact that most business leaders don't practice accepted leadership principles (see leadership BS by J Pfeffer), it couldn't hurt if more people in upper management took a look.
There were a few things with which I disagree. The author suggested that (foolish IMO) people who leave their social media sites wide open are more trustworthy than (wise IMO) people who restrict access to their personal sections. He also puts a great deal more stock than I do in social media like Twitter and Linked-In. Of course he is in that business. For me this was not an absorbing read and I struggled to keep going at times. I am retired and typically complete books in 2-3 days, this one took me 17 days on and off. My final caveat is that these are the author's opinions based on his personal experiences and those of his colleagues in the self-help industry. Thus, there is no attempt to quantify efficacy of the individual methods.
Overall I suspect this would be useful read for twenty somethings starting out and a reasonable reference/review for the more seasoned worker. However, considering the fact that most business leaders don't practice accepted leadership principles (see leadership BS by J Pfeffer), it couldn't hurt if more people in upper management took a look.
February 24, 2019
Since there are many reviews about the pseudo-psychological theories of the book, I want to defend it; because it is exactly what the author described : people's skills that can make you more efficient mostly in your work but also personal life. Nothing more and nothing less. It's not deep psychoanalysis, neither extravagant tricks to make you superhuman.
The stories of Dave's life and tips are simple and clear, not complicated to understand, but that doesn't make them shallow or fake. Precisely, the things to make are relationships easier are just small things which we have probably heard but never took time to put them in practise, and the stories in this book can show us situations where we can actually do it. I loved the story about the primary teacher who told Dave's class that everyone can a be a leader in a certain situation, and the example about his family, where his daughter is the leader in cleaning the table!
This said, there are some stories which are too short and limit shallow, but that is the minority.
Last point, this isn't a psychology book and it is obvious from the beginning. But there are many chapters, particularly those about mirroring and validation which are very correct, and if somebody thinks about their personal life, I am sure they have been in similar situations. Again, the fact that they are "easy and simple to get" doesn't make them less true.
The stories of Dave's life and tips are simple and clear, not complicated to understand, but that doesn't make them shallow or fake. Precisely, the things to make are relationships easier are just small things which we have probably heard but never took time to put them in practise, and the stories in this book can show us situations where we can actually do it. I loved the story about the primary teacher who told Dave's class that everyone can a be a leader in a certain situation, and the example about his family, where his daughter is the leader in cleaning the table!
This said, there are some stories which are too short and limit shallow, but that is the minority.
Last point, this isn't a psychology book and it is obvious from the beginning. But there are many chapters, particularly those about mirroring and validation which are very correct, and if somebody thinks about their personal life, I am sure they have been in similar situations. Again, the fact that they are "easy and simple to get" doesn't make them less true.
April 17, 2019
For anyone wanting to get ahead in life and accomplish more goals, getting more success in life, this book is awesome. The secret to getting what you want in life, according to this book, is to not focus on getting what you want in life... the biggest paradox!
Instead, connect with the right people, help them, inspire them and then when you need help with something they won't hesitate a second to help you achieving YOUR succes. Start the vicious circle of succes TOGETHER by offering FIRST your help and well-meant inspiration. When push comes to shove, help will be there for others.
The concept on modern-day content creation was also a great insight: EEI = Educate, Entertain and Inspire. Nowadays, there is a 'content shock' on all social media platforms and therefore we all think we need to create GREAT content that stands out. This is not true, according to Dave Kerpen: people don't really care who created the actual content (video, article, ...) but who shares it. So don't be afraid to share other people's contentm, as long as it resonates with your audience!
Inspiring read where the author take us on a trip to memory lane, where he tickles our imagination bone with the awesome stories with each point he makes.
Recommend.
Instead, connect with the right people, help them, inspire them and then when you need help with something they won't hesitate a second to help you achieving YOUR succes. Start the vicious circle of succes TOGETHER by offering FIRST your help and well-meant inspiration. When push comes to shove, help will be there for others.
The concept on modern-day content creation was also a great insight: EEI = Educate, Entertain and Inspire. Nowadays, there is a 'content shock' on all social media platforms and therefore we all think we need to create GREAT content that stands out. This is not true, according to Dave Kerpen: people don't really care who created the actual content (video, article, ...) but who shares it. So don't be afraid to share other people's contentm, as long as it resonates with your audience!
Inspiring read where the author take us on a trip to memory lane, where he tickles our imagination bone with the awesome stories with each point he makes.
Recommend.
May 4, 2016
I bought this book in the London Gatwick airport to read on the plane. It's a very easy read, as I finished it on the short plane ride, less than two hours, from London to Venice.
The value of this book is not in the ease of the read but the application of the advice given is to be put in over time.
I appreciated the suggested actions after each of the chapters. I have used some of them, the ones I have remembered at least (I gave the book to a friend for them to read) and it has improved my relationships with people, and helped in getting things done.
The advice given seems, for the most part, obvious, but that's its strength. The anecdotes support the advice, as well as the suggested actions. This is not a book that you read and forget about. You just keep working on the skills they suggest.
The value of this book is not in the ease of the read but the application of the advice given is to be put in over time.
I appreciated the suggested actions after each of the chapters. I have used some of them, the ones I have remembered at least (I gave the book to a friend for them to read) and it has improved my relationships with people, and helped in getting things done.
The advice given seems, for the most part, obvious, but that's its strength. The anecdotes support the advice, as well as the suggested actions. This is not a book that you read and forget about. You just keep working on the skills they suggest.
February 6, 2021
If you have read '' How to win friends and influence people'' of Dale Cargenie. You do not need to read this book. You will not learn anything. The things that are interesting in ''The art of people'' are directly pulled directly from it. If you have read, anything really, about business, leadership, communication or management, you will not learn anything from this book. The whole thing felt like a ''I need to establish myself as an expert in a field, but don't have much to say blog post'' that you see too often on Linkedin. The book would have been a perfect blog post. Somewhat interesting subject but not developed enough to learn something new.
This book is a compilation of very high level ideas and concept that most people already know that lacked depth and felt unfinished. I was very disappointed.
This book is a compilation of very high level ideas and concept that most people already know that lacked depth and felt unfinished. I was very disappointed.
April 18, 2016
Oh my gosh!!! This is a Fantastic book, that I will be re-reading every now and then to keep what I learned fresh in my mind. Dave, you put together this book to help others, and you did exactly that. Even in the smallest of details this book made me think, "wow...so that's what I have been doing wrong for awhile" or "Hey, that's a spectacular idea to use in my personal relationships too!" So many "Ah-ha" moments for me, that I can't even begin to explain how valuable this book was for me. I know it will help many others in their business and personal relationships as well. I already referred it to someone I know in sales who will eat the contents of this book up in no time flat. Thanks so much for the opportunity to review this book through Goodreads!
March 19, 2017
So the thing I love about Dave Kerpen is that he practices what he preaches which is evident from the many real life stories that he shares. The result is that he has successfully used his "art" to "craft" a life that is optimized on just about every level: spouse, parent, friend, and successful business person. And as y0u read his many tips--the title says 11 but there are really far more--you realize that they only thing stopping you from realizing your own optimal life, is a failure to consistently follow Dave's "playbook."
I also loved the Enneagram Assessment at the end of the book which accurately determined that I was a 7.
Enjoy!
I also loved the Enneagram Assessment at the end of the book which accurately determined that I was a 7.
Enjoy!
November 25, 2017
Some healthy reminders for the entrepreneurial type who wants to keep their game sharp. A few items that stood out to me:
- What's your 'bright orange shoe' equivalent that's a little quirky and could act as a conversation starter?
- Social media should be 30% self-promotion, 70% promoting/praising others
- When someone asks how you are, get in the habit of replying, "fantastic" (Assuming you mean it)
- Have a list of inspirational quotes you like handy, and populate your feed with 'em
- Apparently, you can tweet your latest work to @DaveKerpen #artofpeople and he'll share it ;)
- What's your 'bright orange shoe' equivalent that's a little quirky and could act as a conversation starter?
- Social media should be 30% self-promotion, 70% promoting/praising others
- When someone asks how you are, get in the habit of replying, "fantastic" (Assuming you mean it)
- Have a list of inspirational quotes you like handy, and populate your feed with 'em
- Apparently, you can tweet your latest work to @DaveKerpen #artofpeople and he'll share it ;)
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