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I Had a Nice Time and Other Lies...: How to find love & sh*t like that
The New York Times bestselling authors of Nice Is Just a Place in France and When’s Happy Hour? and creators of the online humor and advice phenomenon Betches.com and Instagram account @Betches explain the brutal truths of how to date like a true betch, with insights from the Head Pro.
In the age of Tinder, Hinge, or any other dating app that matches you with randos, the dating game has grown complex and confusing. Cue the Betches—first, we helped you win at basically everything, and now we’re going to help you win the most important battle a betch can face.
Maybe you’re a Delusional Dater who needs to get in touch with reality (seriously, he’s just NOT that f***ing into you) or perhaps you’re a TGF who needs to stop being so desperate and start playing the game. Or maybe you’re just tired of swiping left and ready for the pro of your dreams to put a 15-karat diamond ring on it so you can stop pretending to do work. Either way, we’ve got you covered. With insight from the Betches’ own Head Pro, this book is a must-have bible for any betch looking for love.
So put away the Ben & Jerry’s fro-yo (just because it’s low fat doesn’t mean it’s okay to eat the whole tub) and start dating like a winner.
In the age of Tinder, Hinge, or any other dating app that matches you with randos, the dating game has grown complex and confusing. Cue the Betches—first, we helped you win at basically everything, and now we’re going to help you win the most important battle a betch can face.
Maybe you’re a Delusional Dater who needs to get in touch with reality (seriously, he’s just NOT that f***ing into you) or perhaps you’re a TGF who needs to stop being so desperate and start playing the game. Or maybe you’re just tired of swiping left and ready for the pro of your dreams to put a 15-karat diamond ring on it so you can stop pretending to do work. Either way, we’ve got you covered. With insight from the Betches’ own Head Pro, this book is a must-have bible for any betch looking for love.
So put away the Ben & Jerry’s fro-yo (just because it’s low fat doesn’t mean it’s okay to eat the whole tub) and start dating like a winner.
320 pages, Hardcover
First published April 19, 2016
197 people are currently reading
2246 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 128 reviews
January 21, 2019
The best part of this book was when it was over.
June 28, 2017
I was very excited to read this because I thought I was a betch. I'm blunt, straightforward and won't take shit from anybody. But I found this book to be really freaking mean and made me feel bad about myself. In a non-helpful way.
There was some great advice in the book, but getting through it was hard because it was so insulting! Being mean is not funny. It can ruin people's self-esteem and I don't think capitalizing on it is right.
There was some great advice in the book, but getting through it was hard because it was so insulting! Being mean is not funny. It can ruin people's self-esteem and I don't think capitalizing on it is right.
May 29, 2017
I got a free copy of this book from YPG. Definitely not something I would normally read but it was hilarious and a great reading palette cleanser. Fun and not serious. Sometimes you just need fluff. I regret nothing.
August 24, 2016
"If someone is treating you like they don't give a shit, it's because they don't give a shit"
Ouch! But accurate. Will be remembering that quote for a long time. I've realized I'm more of a Karen than a Betch- so I found this books honesty equal parts depressing and enlightening.
Ouch! But accurate. Will be remembering that quote for a long time. I've realized I'm more of a Karen than a Betch- so I found this books honesty equal parts depressing and enlightening.
March 10, 2017
Bit too 'betchy' for my taste. It's like a crew of mean girls got together and are then discussing life and relationships in today's world. As the nerd who never was popular, this didn't ring with me at all.
January 11, 2017
Hilarious! Great after a break-up or while beginning to date again!
May 9, 2016
Exactly what you would want in a dating "advice" book from the Betches. Hilarious yet real, and of course, super betchy. Read the first 2/3 of the book, and maybe skip the final chapters on actual relationships since they're not as funny and don't seem to be the Betches area of expertise. But honestly you're reading this to laugh at all the horrific dating app experiences and texting fails that every 20-something can relate to. Take it all with a grain of salt, and you'll find some actual solid advice amid the jokes about bros, Tinder, and not being a #Karen.
March 29, 2016
While this book will certainly never be a selection in Emma Watson's Our Shared Shelf feminist book club, it provided enough laughs and betchy advice to be a worthwhile read for most millennial women looking to improve their love life.
July 19, 2023
Lei este libro sin esperar nada y al fial termine riendo bastante y con muy buenos consejos.
Siento que es para un publico mas juvenil y, obviamente, con mas interes que yo en el tema de las citas, pero aun asi es muy interesante ver todo el tema de las relaciones.
Lo malo es que el tema del peso y la apariencia fisica fue muy ofensivo.
Siento que es para un publico mas juvenil y, obviamente, con mas interes que yo en el tema de las citas, pero aun asi es muy interesante ver todo el tema de las relaciones.
Lo malo es que el tema del peso y la apariencia fisica fue muy ofensivo.
May 12, 2016
Not sure why I bought this book since I didn't like/finish the first one by the same author(s)--Nice is Just a Place in France. I honestly was not sure if the first book was a satire or if the author(s) wanted to be taken seriously. This one is a bit better; kinda funny, a bit more serious, but I dunno. Still seems like one of those junk books you'd read when you have nothing better to do and don't want to delve into a heavy book of actual literary value. Read the first two chapters but got kind of annoyed/bored of it. Not sure if I'll end up finishing it.
Update:
I did end up finishing it. Some parts were pretty funny although 95% of the book is common sense and the entire book can be summed up in two words: love yourself. If you're not sure how to, then read the book so you know how to at least pretend like you do. Overall, pretty enjoyable book.
Update:
I did end up finishing it. Some parts were pretty funny although 95% of the book is common sense and the entire book can be summed up in two words: love yourself. If you're not sure how to, then read the book so you know how to at least pretend like you do. Overall, pretty enjoyable book.
May 3, 2016
Such a great book! Totally hilarious, filled with great advice, and completely accurate!
August 24, 2016
Ridiculous book, and the "advice" made me shake my head at it, but provided some good laughs too.
June 5, 2020
I found this book to be incredibly insulting, derogatory, and absolute garbage. I didn't even manage to finish the first chapter. Don't waste your time.
November 14, 2020
Great post-breakup/divorce empowering funny book.
March 11, 2021
Not my normal read, but a fun read. All the advice should not be taken too seriously. However, if you find yourself dating again it is a light-hearted hilarious read and great on audio.
August 29, 2019
Both hilarious and terrible. Betches be crazy.
I'm clearly not the demographic for the book, which seems to be a late 20 something party girl who hasn't been able to sustain a healthy long term relationship leading into marriage, but who really really wants to. A lot of the advice seems like common sense: Don't get complacent, keep striving and improving yourself, don't be completely oblivious to things like guys' dickishness or cheating. An equal part of advice is stupid game playing: don't be direct, play power positioning relationship moves which are bound to lead to a negative relationship overall. Most of the advice from the point of the 'bro' was sensible and basic, a counter to the neurotic overthinking presented beforehand.
This book made me very grateful for my long term relationship with my wife, showing tons of problems that we don't have that seem to be more common with the relationships described here. As a quirky straightforward dude who always wanted a long term relationship, I'm glad that this book would keep crazy betches away from me, and I like a little bit of craziness!
If you want a betch relationship, follow the advice in this book. If you want a healthy marriage, you might want to look elsewhere.
I'm clearly not the demographic for the book, which seems to be a late 20 something party girl who hasn't been able to sustain a healthy long term relationship leading into marriage, but who really really wants to. A lot of the advice seems like common sense: Don't get complacent, keep striving and improving yourself, don't be completely oblivious to things like guys' dickishness or cheating. An equal part of advice is stupid game playing: don't be direct, play power positioning relationship moves which are bound to lead to a negative relationship overall. Most of the advice from the point of the 'bro' was sensible and basic, a counter to the neurotic overthinking presented beforehand.
This book made me very grateful for my long term relationship with my wife, showing tons of problems that we don't have that seem to be more common with the relationships described here. As a quirky straightforward dude who always wanted a long term relationship, I'm glad that this book would keep crazy betches away from me, and I like a little bit of craziness!
If you want a betch relationship, follow the advice in this book. If you want a healthy marriage, you might want to look elsewhere.
May 10, 2022
I love The Betches. I follow them everywhere; I like, retweet, regram, etc. This was not a terrible book, but it was not a great one. I think, perhaps, even just two years can make a difference with subject matter like this. Many sections came across as a bit tone-deaf in relation to the social climate today...more
January 5, 2017
Funny & honest. Truth hurts & I liked it lol
September 27, 2023
I only had a nice time when I closed the book. Listen, I’m a basic betch, I love self-help and guide through life books even if I don’t always take their advice because I just wanna see how others view this life. But, this?
This was just… well, it was almost hateful.
Towards many people in this crappy dating life.
I read it because I was bored and reeling from a situationship spiraling towards situationSHIT (don’t they always) but of course I’ve been emotionally invested for two years, and needed a distraction.
“I had a nice time” only made me feel worse about myself, and I can get it if they wrote it to be funny. There’s some good advice in there, don’t get me wrong, but in a very dumbed down and condescending tone that’s repeated for 300 pages. It’s not necessary.
And the many references to pop culture and the writing, it’s like they were trying far too hard to appeal to the millennials and Gen z, and failed almost dramatically.
I guess that makes me the “uptight” Karen, as they called the type in the book, but really, I have emotions that I have trouble processing and I cannot imagine anyone with that same issue picking up this book and genuinely trying to find self-help in it. Listen, I even reread it after taking my antidepressants and mood stabilizer, and I can say my view remains the same.
PS. The sly backhanded comment about food stamps wasn’t funny, and I don’t know why they would see it as such.
TL;DR
Pick up a different book. And this is coming from someone who reads these books for FUN.
This was just… well, it was almost hateful.
Towards many people in this crappy dating life.
I read it because I was bored and reeling from a situationship spiraling towards situationSHIT (don’t they always) but of course I’ve been emotionally invested for two years, and needed a distraction.
“I had a nice time” only made me feel worse about myself, and I can get it if they wrote it to be funny. There’s some good advice in there, don’t get me wrong, but in a very dumbed down and condescending tone that’s repeated for 300 pages. It’s not necessary.
And the many references to pop culture and the writing, it’s like they were trying far too hard to appeal to the millennials and Gen z, and failed almost dramatically.
I guess that makes me the “uptight” Karen, as they called the type in the book, but really, I have emotions that I have trouble processing and I cannot imagine anyone with that same issue picking up this book and genuinely trying to find self-help in it. Listen, I even reread it after taking my antidepressants and mood stabilizer, and I can say my view remains the same.
PS. The sly backhanded comment about food stamps wasn’t funny, and I don’t know why they would see it as such.
TL;DR
Pick up a different book. And this is coming from someone who reads these books for FUN.
December 28, 2021
I know a lot of people are obsessed with the Betches but after reading this I have to say I'm not really a fan. For one thing, they're trying way too hard to be funny. When you're funny, you don't need to force it down my throat, waving your arms and making sexist/homophobic/racist jokes just to prove that you're edgy and worth peoples' time. Like, almost every section of this book included some statement(s) that made me borderline uncomfortable because they felt judgemental and hateful - not biting and funny.
Just because a man talks about his feeling doesn't mean he's attracted to other men.
Just because a woman doesn't deprive herself of pizza doesn't mean she's going to gain weight.
On that note, the fat shaming and fatphobia in this book was out of control and I was just not impressed.
In between all of these poor taste jokes that weren't even that funny there were a few tidbits I found interesting and insightful, so it wasn't a total wash. I just really don't like this people and never need to read/listen to/digest any content ever made by them again.
Just because a man talks about his feeling doesn't mean he's attracted to other men.
Just because a woman doesn't deprive herself of pizza doesn't mean she's going to gain weight.
On that note, the fat shaming and fatphobia in this book was out of control and I was just not impressed.
In between all of these poor taste jokes that weren't even that funny there were a few tidbits I found interesting and insightful, so it wasn't a total wash. I just really don't like this people and never need to read/listen to/digest any content ever made by them again.
July 18, 2017
It's one of those books whose cover reveals exactly what you should expect on the inside. The Betches are definitely trying to give real life advice with some humour (a lot of which I didn't necessarily appreciate).
Practical? Somewhat.
Should you take it seriously and treat it as the dating Bible? No. And even they said not to take it too seriously.
One concept that they coined which I thought was super interesting is "emotional masturbation". Basically it's when (usually female) people start to envision the engagement, wedding, kids and dogs with a person with only two dates in. This is definitely something a lot of us fall into and they provided some interesting insight on this matter.
Overall, it's an easy-read and a fun little pass-time book geared towards white, middle class women who would like to fall into a certain stereotype and get a certain stereotypical men.
Practical? Somewhat.
Should you take it seriously and treat it as the dating Bible? No. And even they said not to take it too seriously.
One concept that they coined which I thought was super interesting is "emotional masturbation". Basically it's when (usually female) people start to envision the engagement, wedding, kids and dogs with a person with only two dates in. This is definitely something a lot of us fall into and they provided some interesting insight on this matter.
Overall, it's an easy-read and a fun little pass-time book geared towards white, middle class women who would like to fall into a certain stereotype and get a certain stereotypical men.
May 29, 2018
Sometimes you need a junk book... but skip this one. Not funny at all although the authors try hard. They fail hard, too.
Перелистнув две страницы привлек язык своей весело-современно-нелитературностью, плюс название обещало что-то типа коллекции веселых эссе. Обрадовавшись, взяла читать не придавая значения деталям. Огромная ошибка! Книга оказалась не тем, а стиль написания - ужасным. Бе ногу передать сколько раз были использованы "водка сода" и "декоративные подушки" для придания тексту флера неформальности. Жесть! Аж гуглила авторов чтоб посмотреть кто это чудо написал. Страдала, но читала - плохость книжки затянула настолько, что остановиться просто не получилось и что иронично - парочку параграфов все-таки оказались полезными.
Перелистнув две страницы привлек язык своей весело-современно-нелитературностью, плюс название обещало что-то типа коллекции веселых эссе. Обрадовавшись, взяла читать не придавая значения деталям. Огромная ошибка! Книга оказалась не тем, а стиль написания - ужасным. Бе ногу передать сколько раз были использованы "водка сода" и "декоративные подушки" для придания тексту флера неформальности. Жесть! Аж гуглила авторов чтоб посмотреть кто это чудо написал. Страдала, но читала - плохость книжки затянула настолько, что остановиться просто не получилось и что иронично - парочку параграфов все-таки оказались полезными.
January 8, 2017
I really enjoyed reading this book, made me laugh a lot and loved the way it was explained. Very simple, to the point and no sugar coating. The last chapters were a little weird to me because it seemed like it was written for rich women lol. "Should you quit your job after you get married?" Ummm yeah, sadly it's not a choice for many of us lol. But overall I think the book is great and fun and I deff recommended to any crazy betches out there! ^_^ Im looking forward to reading their other books.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 17, 2017
I wanted something silly/snarky to read after reading some weighty books recently and the news being depressing as hell. Simply put, this book is trashy (in a bad way) and makes me feel bad about the future. No one should ever take dating advice from me but damn, at least I know what century we're living in. I got this book via the library (thank goodness). Don't worry about purchasing one of you want to read it. Just go to a used bookstore and buy a home economics book from the 1950's. You will get similar results. Boo.
December 27, 2017
10/10 would not recommend. I read the first betches book and didn't like either but I bought both of them the same day so thought I would keep an open mind and try this. This didn't go much better than the first book. I'm just not a fan. I feel like their sarcasm missed the mark and came off more scornful towards those they were trying to make fun of. Everything was about getting drunk, being skinny, and daddy's credit card. I just graduated from college so it's not like I'm not in their demographic but like I said before, I'm just not a fan.
July 24, 2018
I came across this book because I've been following the Betches account on Ig for some months now. The book is written with the exact type of humour they use on their posts, so it's a very funny book. However I had some doubts about reading and including this book in here because I never read self-help books, I consider them just a bunch of bs in general. But here I am and I actually enjoyed it and found some useful advice, specially conserning self-image.
So yeah, this book didn't change my life or open my eyes or whatever, but it did make me feel less alone on some issues.
So yeah, this book didn't change my life or open my eyes or whatever, but it did make me feel less alone on some issues.
November 22, 2016
I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review
Exactly what you would want in a dating "advice" book from the Betches
"If someone is treating you like they don't give a shit, it's because they don't give a shit"
Ouch! But accurate. Will be remembering that quote for a long time. I've realized I'm more of a Karen than a Betch- so I found this books honesty equal parts depressing and enlightening
A very fun and interesting read
Exactly what you would want in a dating "advice" book from the Betches
"If someone is treating you like they don't give a shit, it's because they don't give a shit"
Ouch! But accurate. Will be remembering that quote for a long time. I've realized I'm more of a Karen than a Betch- so I found this books honesty equal parts depressing and enlightening
A very fun and interesting read
January 12, 2021
I’m 22 and fresh out of college so this book totally intrigued me. Easy read with some advice that really related to me. I felt like I was having a conversation with a friend!! I even laughed out loud a few times because it had this spunky attitude to it. I didn’t really like the guy advice part because it seemed a little basic and cheesy but who cares because you can just skip it! Definitely recommend for a girl in her twenties either getting out of a relationship or looking for one!
March 31, 2021
After seeing this book advertised on a tik tok video as something all single girls need to read I thought I’d invest. It’s an easy, chatty read than you can just pick up and read the odd page or chapter of every now and then. I did enjoy this book however some things I didn’t really agree with and I took with a pinch of salt. Despite that it was a fun read and a little different to something I’d normally pick up
October 3, 2017
The entire time I was reading this book, I felt a mix of embarrassment and wonder. One the one hand, how embarrassing to read a book about dating and on the other hand, HOLY SHIT THIS BOOK MAKES SO MUCH SENSE. At the end, I wasn't embarrassed anymore. I felt like a bomb ass betch ready to conquer the world, with or without a man.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 128 reviews