Dear Prudence: The Story Behind the Song

by Prudence Farrow Bruns

“The sun is up, the sky is blue, it’s beautiful, and so are you…”

Those simple lines from the Beatles’ ballad, “Dear Prudence,” are easily recognizable by anyone who lived through the 1960s, as well as by the millions of people who continue to enjoy the Beatles’ music today.

But who was Prudence? Did she ever come out into the sunshine and greet the new day, as John Lennon beseeched her to do? What’s the real story behind the song?

Prudence Farrow Bruns, a daughter of the prominent Farrow family that includes sister and actress Mia Farrow, finally sets the story straight. Her memoir speaks to her three-month self-imposed meditative seclusion in India in 1968, while also carefully examining the universal experience of the 1960s youth movement.

Farrow honestly and unflinchingly explores how music, drugs, the Vietnam War, and eastern mysticism and philosophy changed millions of young people’s worldviews during one of America’s most tumultuous decades. She also touches on her own famous family’s heartaches and triumphs, even as she voices the experiences of an entire generation through a single iconic song.

Genres: Music, Nonfiction, Meditation, Memoir, Autobiography

241 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 26, 2015

Reviews

[Sam Rainer · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well written book that has an in depth look of the Woodstock generation, both the pros and cons of one of the most transforming eras in the world. But it's also an interesting autobiography by Prudence Farrow and her search to find peace via Transcendental Meditation. TM seems to promote meditation from within. Christianity believes in a personal God who has revealed Himself via Scripture, with the Bible as the only authority to make Jesus' incarnation, death, and resurrection to save sinners throughout all 66 books of the Bible. My hat is off to Ms. Farrow's for both a personal journey and a compelling history.

[Kathryn Mattern · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is someone's memoir, and as such it tells us lots of things that are not of burning interest to her readers, but I have to say I love the tone of the book which is warm and confiding. Prudence Farrow Bruns writes in an open, heart-felt, honest style that I am completely enjoying. I feel quite drawn in to her life within her family of seven children with celebrity parents, her mother's Irish nature mysticism and Catholicism, and her father's adventurous, sometimes too colorful spirit. There is so much 'real life' in these pages and she has rendered down huge experiences into cogent paragraphs and pages, which is I see as a successful feat in writing. I don't want to give too much away, but most definitely there are highs and lows in her life story which are quite moving. I also enjoy the occasional sentence that alludes to spiritual moments in her life. I'm not quite half through the book, so I will write more when I've finished it. The book is well-written and it's a slice of life.

Well, now I am indeed half way through and I see why my friend who talked about the book said it was the worst case of mental illness she'd ever read about - but I have to wonder whether this is mental illness or a stage that some spiritual seekers pass through? It's in the spiritual tradition of St. Anthony of Egypt for example. I went through something similar myself, although not as extreme and it would appear that Prudence did not receive meds or therapy - and neither did I - but we went on to be productive, positive, loving people in our lives, after experiencing the divine presence within. In my training in spiritual direction (at Mercy Center in Burlingame Calif) I learned that there are ways to distinguish spiritual transformation from mental illness. Still, Prudence calls what she went through 'mental illness' and certainly going through anything on that spectrum (the dark struggles she confronted) is not 'normal'. But 'normal' isn't everything. For example, great athletes are not 'normal' either - they are extraordinary. And truthfully, I am finding Prudence's story to be quite extraordinary, and I am more impressed by her as I read along.

If I could interpret her story in a slightly different way, I might want to look at the issues the Artemis-woman goes through, a la Jean Shinoda-Bolen and others, because especially as a child and adolescent, Prudence seems to fit that archetype. Too outspoken, perceived as 'wild,' independent and yet running with the pack at the same time, and perceived as unmanageable and also 'not beautiful' (even though that's not really true.') It's a tough, isolating road for Artemis in modern society. I like to de-pathologize human experience as much as possible. There is real mental illness in life, which is usually fairly intractable, but besides that there is also real 'human suffering' in life which can 'look like' mental illness, sometimes for a long time, especially grief - and Prudence and her siblings experienced so many huge important losses so close together! I won't spoil by listing them, but when you read it you will recognize just how huge all of these losses were, partly because Prudence writes in a way that will convey that to the reader.

When she gets to the part about Maharishi, I really enjoyed the book full on. I loved the synchronistic stepping-stones that led her to him, could relate to the intense vastness and depth she experienced in his presence, the healing process TM led her through, and I especially liked the conclusions she drew from her experience. Very mature and realistic. This is a great book (of its type), folks, but it does take grit to get through the middle! Those who persevere will enjoy the final third of the book.

[Melinda · Rating 1 out of 5]

Read for public radio station book club. This is the ugliest cover I've seen on a book in a long time. To be fair, serious readers don't judge a book by its cover, but if it hadn't been a book club selection, I would have never picked this one up. I think the cover illustration, apparently on notebook paper, is a portrait of the author drawn by her husband. Okay. This memoir works perfectly well as an account of granny's life written for her grandchildren, but it does not work as a literary memoir. I suspect it was published because of the Beatles connection. Why else? I see the author published it herself. That explains the cover. Most of the memoir recounts growing up with her seven siblings in a Hollywood family. Nothing that we haven't read before there. Her famous parents are not very adept at parenting. Dad the director is always working and even lives apart from the family from time to time. Mom the actress takes a Broadway show on tour and leaves her children to be cared for by a series of inept housekeepers/sitters. Prudence never learns to study or do chores, but gets an advanced degree in partying and discovers sitting around smoking pot all day doesn't lead to getting on with her life. What are we to make about statements such as, "Up to that point, I had just dabbled in mental illness, but now I was major league"? Drug use, including hallucinogens like LSD and peyote lead to mental illness, depression and paranoia? "It was several years before I was comfortable taking care of basic household chores." Really? Poor little rich girl grows up isolated and pursues Transcendental Meditation because she's not isolated enough? Growing up Catholic, Prudence is desperate to find spiritual meaning and purpose in her life. The miracles of the church and worship of saints provide an odd gateway to Eastern religion, vegetarianism, and swami-worship. In India she meditates eight hours a day. If I understand correctly, if everyone would adopt TM, the world would be a better place. Prudence is a lonely, isolated child and, as an adult, adopts a religious practice that continues that isolation. Certainly much to think and talk about with this memoir. If just didn't work for me.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Now I want to listen

Very well written memoir with emotion and details that kept me riveted.
I’d love to have heard more about her experience with the Beatles but I guess her lack of being star struck is really who she is. Got to buy the song now