Unplayable Lies

by Dan Jenkins

In Unplayable Lies, Dan Jenkins takes us on a tour of the links as only he can do it. Here, Dan delves into the greatest rounds of golf he's ever seen, the funniest things said on a golf course, the rivalries on tour and in the press box, the game's most magical moments--and its most absurd. Filled with well-known characters like Tiger Woods, to others like Titanic Thompson--gambler, golf hustler, accused murderer, legendary storyteller--Unplayable Lies is an ode to the game of golf and the people who play it. But it is Dan Jenkins, so nothing--even the game itself--can escape his wrath, his critical eye, or his acerbic pen. This is Dan Jenkins at his best, writing about the sport he loves the most.

Genres: Sports, Nonfiction

272 pages, Paperback

First published March 17, 2015

About the author

Dan Jenkins was an American author and sportswriter, most notably for Sports Illustrated.

Jenkins was born and raised in Fort Worth, Texas, where he attended R.L. Paschal High School and Texas Christian University (TCU), where he played on the varsity golf team. Jenkins worked for many publications including the Fort Worth Press, Dallas Times Herald, Playboy, and Sports Illustrated. In 1985 he retired from Sports Illustrated and began writing books full-time and maintained a monthly column in Golf Digest magazine.

Larry King called Jenkins "the quintessential Sports Illustrated writer" and "the best sportswriter in America." Jenkins authored numerous works and over 500 articles for Sports Illustrated. In 1972, Jenkins wrote his first novel, Semi-Tough.

His daughter, Sally Jenkins, is a sports columnist for the Washington Post.

Reviews

[Jim Carrado]

If you still have your own teeth, then you are too young to read this book. Written by an octogenarian for octogenarians. The only thing missing is a picture of an old man yelling "get off my lawn"!

[Zach B]

I’ve never been unable to finish a book about golf until this one. I can’t say I really enjoyed any part of what I read, which was just about half of the book. Any author that can make their racism and sexism really pop in writing has to be much more of both in real life. I understand that it’s supposed to be funny, but it really doesn’t hit. He describes his fictional 16 year old female golfers as wearing “short skirts and breast-hugging shirts”. Might want to check the Epstein files for this guy. Wish I wouldn’t have spent any money or time on this book.

[theinroad]

Brilliant on most fronts and truly enjoyable. Dan does have an obvious “good ole boy” bias toward guys like Hogan, Crenshaw, etc. and can be a jerk. But otherwise funny and a great writer with unique insights into the game of golf.

[Mike Harris]

Solid collection - Jenkins knows his golf. I could read him on golf history all day and all night. Some of his satire misses the mark but most of it is funny. Interesting line in here about Ernest Hemingway

[JR]

I had read the occasional Dan Jenkins article in golf magazines and found his writing enjoyable and insightful, thus my interest in reading this book. Although I enjoyed his pieces centered around the history of the game (along with his opinions thereof), I didn't particularly care for his attempt at humorous fiction. I found those pieces to be too numerous and not particularly funny. Overall a disappointment for me.

[JAMES LUNDY]

How could you not love it?

He gets to say or write anything he wants. He has "been there and done that" with everything and everyone Golf. Other than being jealous, reading everything he writes is the best way to live it vicariously. Can't wait for the next one. Keep up the good work.

[Dustin]

It was a fun, easy read through golf history. I enjoyed the articles and selections that actually covered some history. The 'humorous' articles weren't my cup of tea. Just not my brand of funny. Still a worthwhile golf read, though.

[Bob plunkett]

the chapters when Dan talks about REAL golf history are good...

[Maggiendp]

When I heard Dan Jenkins died, I wanted to read something by him again. Semi-Tough was my favourite sports novel when I was in my 20s. Lots has changed since then and his red-neck outlook on life is no longer so amusing to me, but I do continue to think he was a great humour writer. I did skip over a lot of the sexist stuff, not so funny.

[Don Gorman]

(2 1/2). The full breadth of Dan Jenkin's tongue in cheek humor, unparalleled wit and amazing golf history are all on full display in this little collection. Some of these stories I have encountered in other publications, but many were new to me as well. It is hard not to laugh out loud some of the time. Truly for light hearted golf nuts, this is a very entertaining read. Good stuff.

[Chris]

A collection of essays that Dan has written overtime is put together in the book Unplayable Lies. Simply put, when he sticks to the facts and talks about some of the things he has seen, the book is interesting. When he writes satirical essays about Golf, quite frankly, he is not funny, nor do I think he ever was.

[Steve]

41 short articles on the golf game that he was around for a lifetime. Dan Jenkins has covered all things golf for decades. Great stories, some true and some not. He says what he wants to without restraint. Entertaining, enlightening, and educational even for the most knowledgeable golf player and/or fan.

[Ted Hinkle]

Amusing, factual, informative narrative of Dan Jenkins' storied, sportswriter career. UNPLAYABLE LIES (The Only Golf Book You'll Ever Need) may not take strokes off my game, but it certainly brought back cherished memories of golf's major players and classic tournaments. Well done, Dan Jenkins!

[Travis Standley]

A fun read full of wit and humor. Some of it went past me and as some other reviewers have said some of the satire is a bit unfair. I laughed a lot at the description of today’s junior golfer, and other descriptions. An avid golf fan will enjoy this book.

[Jacquelyn McDonough]

Moderately entertaining. Some of it funny. Some of it boring. Some of it just plain statistics. Three stars is a bit generous.

[Kimberly Brooks]

He's a great writer, descriptive, funny, creative. I did have a hard time knowing which of the stories were made-up and which were real; I kept having to ask my husband!

[Ben]

Jenkins is hilarious

Lifetime of golf views through the lens of true reporting and love for the sport and a few absurd anecdotes

[Bryson Shaw]

Dan Jenkins is a freaking legend!

[Lori]

All the golf trivia you could ever want!

You can use this book to be able to answer any quiz on golfers and their achievements. Enjoy another Jenkins book!

[a.t.m.]

very funny and entertaining book

So sad that the author is no longer with us, but, his legacy lives on. I highly recommend this book.

[Steve Roman]

Light, enjoyable tales from decades of golf coverage

[Dan]

Good review of past and present golfers, especially Hogan, Nicklaus, and Woods. Each is rated on their ability to use different clubs. Hogan was the most accurate, Nicklaus on length and accuracy, Woods chipping and putting. And Lord Byron on his consecutive wins was just hard to beat.

[Corny]

Jenkins is sometimes hysterical. The last essay Talking Heads, which is a parody of TV announcers and sponsors is one of those as are a couple of others. Sometimes he simply tries too hard and goes over the top with the send ups. However, when he is reporting on golf, he has some truly memorable anecdotes and some great observations. One in particular which recurs in several pieces is that the fact that Hogan really won a fifth US Open despite the fact that golf historians credit him with only four, the fifth being during WWII. Jenkins also gives us his all time rankings based on an interesting theory of "majors" which is one way to compare across decades. Nicklaus is still number one but Hagen comes out second which makes for interesting debate. All in all, a very entertaining if somewhat fact-repetitive collection. He clearly shows his prejudices, against Curtis Strange, in favor of Greg Norman etc, but who doesn't have prejudices?

[bruce smith]

DJ is sorely missed

If you are any kind of a sports fan but most especially golf or football, Jenkins stuff is pure unadulterated gold. Any book, any article, any interview, anytime he was both brilliant and a laugh riot. Hopefully he is enjoying that grease sandwich in the pro shop and tearing it up at Goat Hills.

[Dan Panke]

Junk.