Strengths Based Parenting: Developing Your Children's Innate Talents

by Mary Reckmeyer, Jennifer Robison (Primary Contributor)

Strengths Based Parenting doesn’t prescribe one “right” way to parent. Instead, author Mary Reckmeyer empowers parents to embrace their individual parenting style by discovering and developing their own — and their children’s — talents and strengths. With real-life stories, practical advice backed by Gallup data, and access to the Clifton StrengthsFinder and Clifton Youth StrengthsExplorer assessments, Strengths Based Parenting builds the foundation for positive parenting.

How can you discover your children’s unique talents? And how can you use your own talents and strengths to be the most effective and supportive parent possible?

Strengths Based Parenting addresses these and other questions on parents’ minds. But unlike many parenting books, Strengths Based Parenting focuses on identifying and understanding what your children are naturally good at and where they thrive — not on their weaknesses. The book also helps you uncover your own innate talents and effectively apply them to your individual parenting style.

You’ll find stories, examples and practical advice as well as a strengths assessment access code for parents and one for kids, so you can take the first step to discovering your innate talents and those of your children.

Grounded in decades of Gallup research on strengths psychology — as highlighted in Gallup’s StrengthsFinder 2.0 , which has sold nearly 5 million copies to date — Strengths Based Parenting shows you how to uncover your children’s top talents and your own. The strengths journey is one that the whole family embarks on together, and Strengths Based Parenting will guide you and your children to more fulfilling, productive and happy lives.

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction, Psychology, Self Help, Education, Personal Development, Childrens

352 pages, Hardcover

First published May 12, 2015

About the author

Mary Reckmeyer, Ph.D., is the Executive Director of Gallup's Donald O. Clifton Child Development Center, which has received national attention for excellence in early childhood education and helped parents and children build their lives around strengths. She has studied talent-based interviews of thousands of individuals, including children, teachers and parents, and she helped create the Clifton Youth StrengthsExplorer. Reckmeyer also coauthored How Full Is Your Bucket? For Kids. She and her husband have four children.

Reviews

[Book · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sometimes I find myself in a situation where because of the book I like so much, I forget everything around me until I read it to the last page.

As a father of three children, certainly not the best parent in the world, but I hope among those who did good and still carry well the most difficult (and most beautiful) task of helping in the children's growing up – it was a pleasure to read this book.

Why? Because of all the good things that I was able to confirm I did well, but also because of many things I was able to learn from it, realizing that still I have so much space in keep developing myself as good parent.

Although it is February, “Strengths Based Parenting” is certainly a candidate for one of this year’s best books when it comes to parenting and understanding your children - I can highly recommend it.

[Sarah Snipes · Rating 3 out of 5]

I've done quite a bit of digging into my Strengths, my husband's, and my 10 year-old has taken the assessment, too. While I didn't really learn anything mind-blowing from this book, I can see where others who are just learning about how to live with a strengths-based lens would gain a lot. I did really appreciate the suggestions for what to do with/for your child based on his or her strengths. I'm always looking for questions to ask and talk about at the dinner table, so there were even some great prompts to start those conversations around each strength.

[Kayla Frank]

I love StrengthFinder so I was excited to find a book that applies that concept to parenting. I just skimmed this book (November 2025), but it doesn’t seem to apply quite yet with my son being only age 1. I had hoped there would be more content about applying specific strengths to parenting, but it was more generic about why to focus on your strengths, a concept I already buy into.

There are a few sections at the beginning about the thought process of StrengthsFinder, but the bulk of the book explores different tools and language for various ages. StrengthsFinder is for ages 15 and up, and there are 34 theme options (the assessment tells you your top 5 in order, I believe). I’ve already taken this assessment twice (but gladly would again sometime). StrengthsExplorer is for ages 10 to 14. Strength spotting applies the ten StrengthsExplorer talent themes to below age 10, and the book had specific actions and behaviors to look for in young children for each one, but I feel like I would want to revisit this at maybe age 3-4 at the earliest.

[Jennifer Perez · Rating 5 out of 5]

Strengths-Based Parenting is so much more than just another parenting book. It offers practical insight about the strengths-based worldview that will benefit parents and non-parents alike by teaching each reader how to identify both their own strengths and the strengths of others (ie. children, employees, students or a spouse) and then capitalize on those strengths to enjoy a more fulfilling life, career, education, romantic partnership and so on. I imagine some may initially reject the strengths-based model because it seems on the surface in opposition to the growth-mindset paradigm that is so popular today among employers and educators. Nonetheless this is an absolute MUST READ for all parents, managers, educators and for anyone who just wants to know more about their own strengths and how to make their strengths work for them!

[Liz · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great book as a companion to finding out your own strengths with Gallup strengths finder. The best way to learn about strengths is to be coached in it, but this then explains how that can impact our parenting as well. It also outlines the strengths explorer stuff for young teenagers and gives examples of how to parent to your strengths and encourage your children’s. A handy resource for anyone who knows their strengths.

[Melody · Rating 2 out of 5]

Good premise, but mostly rehashes what it in the StrengthsFinder and doesn’t give much additional information or usage. I would have liked lots more examples of parents operating out of their strengths and helping kids operate out of theirs.

[Thomasin Propson · Rating 2 out of 5]

I like the concept of this book, but it wasn’t working with where my family is now, especially since the library copy doesn’t allow us to use the online assessment.

[Abrar · Rating 5 out of 5]

Puts a focus on finding the strengths of children. There's no one recipe on raising children. I like the connection to the Strengths Finder book.

[Chris Theis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not my first book on this topic and as usual very helpful. Worth mentioning I got it from Kindle and there's a hangup regarding getting test licenses to me. Would advise paperback.

[A.M. · Rating 2 out of 5]

This would be a good introductory title for a person new to the Gallup Strengths, so I guess it does what it says on the pack.

2 stars

So far this year, my library saved me A$1805.00

[Emily Rosén · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quick, easy read with some great callouts for positive parenting. Very easy to pick up for anyone familiar with Strengths

[Jamie · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book could’ve been an email.

[Christin · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of the best books I have read about how to help kids discover their strengths. It is a short read. I recommend it for all parents and educators.

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amazing!!! All parents should get! I’m a strength’s coach at its a game changer!

[Devon Conklin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Use as a REFERENCE BOOK!! Most of book is the 34 strength’s descriptions

[Jonathan · Rating 5 out of 5]

You will get a better understanding of this book and its content of you had taken the Gallup strength finder survey and knew what your strengths are. I recently went through a strength based leadership development program which was mostly based on the results of our strengths so I had an in depth, fresh knowledge of my strengths. I was excited to have found this book because I am a new parent, and the success I've had applying my strengths to the work field I look forward to applying it as a parent.

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was an interesting idea, as well as an interesting read. Basically, you parent based on your own strengths, as well as the strengths of your child. It makes me want to take the online StrengthFinder test and have my older children take it too. I think you would get a lot more out of this book if you did that.

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book. I have used the StrengthsFinder assessment with much success at work and like the idea of using my strengths and my husband's strengths in our parenting. I have left a full review on my vlog, "Corporate Mothering" on YouTube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0JVnz...

[Semi-Academic Eric]

What's the difference between this and Awakening Your Child's Natural Genius by Thomas Armstrong or other books that seem to have a similar strengths based theme? Does anyone here have any recommendations of classic books around this concept?

[Kathleen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one was a quick read. I'm familiar with the Clifton StrengthsFinder that this book is based on, and so I appreciated the ideas given here to work on your strengths as a parent and observe your children for their emerging strengths.

[Tich Chiham]

Good book