The Therapist in the Real World: What You Never Learn in Graduate School (But Really Need to Know)

by Jeffrey A. Kottler

Advice and inspiration for the real-life challenges of being a mental health professional.

Graduate school and professional training for therapists often focus on academic preparation, but there’s a lot more that a therapist needs to know to be successful after graduation. With warmth, wisdom, and expertise, Jeffrey A. Kottler covers crucial but underaddressed challenges that therapists face in their professional lives at all levels of experience.PART I , “More Than You Bargained For,” covers the changing landscape of the mental health profession and the limits and merits of professional training.PART II , “Secrets and Neglected Challenges,” explores important issues that are often overlooked during training years, including the ways our clients become our greatest teachers, the power of storytelling, and the role of deception in psychotherapy.And in PART III , “Ongoing Personal and Professional Development,” Kottler focuses on areas in which even the most experienced therapists can continue to hone their talents and maximize their potential, laying out effective tips to navigate organization politics, write and publish books and articles, cultivate creativity in clinical work, maintain a private practice, present and lecture to large and small audiences, sustain passion for the work of helping others, plan for the future, and much more.As honest and inspiring as it is revealing, this book offers therapists and counselors at all levels of experience key ideas for thriving after formal education.

Genres: Psychology, Counselling, Nonfiction, Self Help, Social Work, Mental Health, Education

317 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 27, 2015

About the author

Jeffrey A. Kottler is a professor, psychologist, author, consultant, workshop leader, keynote speaker, and social justice advocate who has spent the past 40 years working throughout the world to promote personal and professional development among professionals and marginalized groups. Jeffrey has worked as a teacher, counselor, therapist, and consultant in a variety of settings including a preschool, primary and secondary school, university, mental health center, crisis center, and corporate settings.

Reviews

[Joan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Kottler's honesty, albeit stark and brutal, gives the graduate a sobering and realistic view of the therapist profession post-graduation.

[Nella ☾ of Bookland · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars

So glad I read this, it was super informative 😌 Though I'm not in the mental health field, so many points covered in this book already apply to my graduate school experience. I've gained more insight on how to manage academic and professional expectations, especially in regards to the knowledge gaps I'll inevitably face in my career. Highly recommend for anyone entering/in a mental health/social-work/allied health program.

[Krysta · Rating 4 out of 5]

VERY validating!

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

As I get ready to transition away from consultation and back into full time therapy at the end of January, I’ve been craving some literature to match my life. As always, my annual holiday Barnes & Noble trip delivered.

Whenever I think about clinical work, I find myself wrestling with two very contradictory sentiments. The first is what brought me to the field, and that got me through graduate school: Helping people is fulfilling and meaningful and an important part of giving back to a community that’s given a lot to me. You know, rainbows and puppy dogs and happily-ever-after.

The second sentiment is quite the opposite; it’s cynical and reflective of distance from graduation, with a bit of experience in “the real world”: Our hopelessly broken system can’t help anyone in any meaningful way, let alone provide a fulfilling and practical career for us worn out, underpaid and unappreciated providers.

Despite the title of Kottler’s book, I did actually hear a bit about the second sentiment in graduate school. To be fair, though, that bit was tiny, and any information we did get was vague and unexplored. Worse, I didn’t hear a peep about what it’s like to work within a system dictated by insurance companies; how to manage boatloads of paperwork in addition to maintaining a demanding caseload; how to keep up and stay competent in light of modalities and theories that change by the second; or how to structure a functional private practice if I ever became so inclined.

So… all the things that make up a modern day therapist’s every day reality. I guess that’s why “baptism by fire” seems to be such a central theme (and complaint) of social workers and other mental health professionals.

Kottler does a great job of exploring a lot of these dynamics in a way that combines optimism and honesty; both needed to make useful career choices and function well (or maybe just better) within this complex, bizarre field of work. Additionally, he offers insights, tips, and a fair amount of cheerleading moral support, which I really appreciated.

Overall, this is an excellent book and a relatively easy read with a slight academic slant. I think any mental health provider would benefit from this strange kind of reality check slash pep talk. I certainly did!

[Christie Gribschaw Lauch · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5/5 Overall this book was pretty okay. I didn’t like it as much as the Yalom books though. I think that’s because the tone was different. This didn’t feel like an empathic conversation between therapists. It felt like more of an informational text. That doesn’t make it bad but it does make it harder to relate to because it didn’t feel as personal or warm. I found myself getting bored at some parts because it didn’t feel like the author was speaking to me. He also at times felt a little lofty or full of himself which was a turn off to a new therapist because it made me feel less than and not want to necessarily continue reading. I think there was a lot of good information in this but I think the way it was presented made it hard to get the full value of what was being offered.

[Tamara · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. The writer seems perhaps slightly arrogant, but I found a lot of what he had to say about being a therapist and working in mental health dead on. Really liked that there were so many specialized chapters- such as presentations and writing as in a therapist role. Highly recommend!

[Dove · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book! Another practical read that helps prepare me for my career as a therapist. I liked a lot of the lessons. For instance, with supervision, I liked his discussion on how during placement/schooling, we are just saying the right terms so our supervisor is happy but after we graduate, we are able to find a supervisor who gels with our personal style and ask the real questions that have been bothering us. I also liked the lesson on lessons on how all counsellors are also teachers/ will need to do a presentation at some point so it's important to learn to explain information and present it creatively without droning on like a lecture- and this is one of our weak points and what we need to work on. I also loved the frank discussion on public sector vs private practice- they both have drawbacks and benefits. One doesn't care about clients more than the other, it comes down to personality (if you like marketing and the business side and high flexibility) vs job security (pension, paid time off). Really practical discussions and advice. I wish it was a bit longer. I wish he shared more of his personal experiences with clients and important lessons he learned. It sometimes felt like a lecture because it was impersonal!

[Katie · Rating 4 out of 5]

The wide variety of topics addressed in this book were such a relief....very relevant and validating to know so many of the thoughts and observations that I reflect on and that swirl around in my head are quite the norm for therapists all across the spectrum...from novice therapists to seasoned therapists, from public service to private practice. This book also helped remind me of some ongoing meaningful questions to ask of myself with my own personal and professional path. Highly recommended read for all therapists interested in personal and professional growth.

[Mary · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this while in my last year of graduate school to become a therapist and that was a great choice because this echoes so many of the thoughts, concerns, excitements, and fears I have about going into this profession. The first part of this book is amazing: I felt like Kottler was reading my mind a bit. Part II was interesting but not as engaging. Part III is where the book started to get old: Kottler gets preachy and I found it annoying at times, though a lot of the information was helpful. Overall, a great read but not without its issues.

[Emily Shurtliff · Rating 2 out of 5]

I felt like most of this book was directed at a seasoned therapist, so reading this as a graduate student who is only one semester into her program was interesting. It was a really informational text, without a many real client examples, which I would’ve liked to see more of. It didn’t hold my attention in the way I wished it would.

[abigail:) · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read and discussed as my internship text during my last semester of grad school. Kottler’s clairvoyance was a big topic discussed in class and it’s sprinkled in generously. The last chapter or so was really the most helpful throughout but I don’t think a few chapters were really informative or applicable. Good to read in a grad internship class due to different perspectives chiming in.

[Emily Ann · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book as a follow up to "On Being a Therapist." As a graduate student I appreciate hearing from a seasoned professional what the field can really be like. Disillusionment and sobering are words that comes to mind.

[April Lark · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was helpful but also quite negative about the grad school experience when it didn't need to be. I didn't retain much new information but will still hang on to this book to reference in the future

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Might be closer to a 4, round up for being the right book when I needed it

[Jennifer Lee · Rating 3 out of 5]

Brutally honest book about the field of therapy that also helped validate and ground myself in the inconsistencies and criticisms I have of graduate school and training so far. I do find that Kottler comes off as full of himself which turns me off as an aspiring therapist.

[Tim Sinnott · Rating 5 out of 5]

I always enjoy reading Jeffrey Kottler. It would be pretty hard to beat the first book of his that I read,On Being A Therapist, about 35 years ago. This books stood its the mark and helps me to reflect on the work I, and the therapeutic community, do.

[Amy · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book really had nothing to do with therapy and what you would need to know. I thought ethics or hrs cases would be discussed but nope.