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Hiding in Plain Sight: 10 Secrets to a Happy Marriage & Family
He wrote it as a secret 30th anniversary gift for his wife. Now it's a practical, fast-paced guide for anyone building a marriage and family that lasts, from busy professionals to newlyweds, in a distracted digital and AI world. Think Atomic Habits for marriage and family.
"A heartfelt, practical look at what helps a marriage stay strong over time. A tech entrepreneur's refreshingly 'analog' answer to a world that can leave couples more digitally connected and personally disconnected than ever."
— Tony & Alisa DiLorenzo, hosts of the ONE Extraordinary Marriage podcast
"At a moment of dizzying technological change, this book reminds us to pay attention to what matters most... Distilling decades of insights into ten easy-to-follow steps, it shares practical advice I wish I had received long ago. It's an essential read."
— Kai Falkenberg, The Guardian
Thirty-three years ago, an exhausted young lawyer almost canceled dinner with the manager of gangster rap icons N.W.A. Instead, he forced himself off the couch, walked into a Beverly Hills café, and met the love of his life. That single decision sparked a 30-year marriage, two grown children who still choose to go to Coachella with their parents, and an enduring realization: lasting relationships don't happen by accident. You build the architecture for them. He calls it Active Serendipity: getting off the couch to open up possibilities, then committing to them again and again.
Tech entrepreneur, former studio executive, and author of the acclaimed Fearless Media, Peter Csathy turns relationship wisdom into immediately actionable steps (the "Secrets") that busy professionals and couples can actually take, including:
Analog living: practical steps for reclaiming your dinner table, your bedroom, and your family time from screens and AI noise.
Dream big: why taking risks together, even ones that fail, can make your marriage and your life richer.
The Top Five list: how to stop living on "marital cruise control" by ranking, with your partner, what actually matters.
Decide in advance: why willpower alone fails as a strategy for fidelity, and how to set guardrails long before temptation appears.
The Experience Calendar: why shared experiences and family rituals keep paying off for years, while "stuff" just depreciates.
Get a dog (seriously): how dogs lower stress, protect your heart, and bring families closer.
Grounded in the latest research from leading experts, including Dr. Robert Waldinger, Dr. John Gottman, Jonathan Haidt, Gretchen Rubin, and Priya Parker, each chapter ends with "News You Can Use": five actionable steps you can take today.
Knowing what matters is never the hard part. Doing is the hard part.
Look up from the screen, get off the couch, and discover the secrets hiding in plain sight.
P.S. When Csathy finally gave his wife the book, her reaction wasn't what he expected. That story is the book's candid final page.
"A heartfelt, practical look at what helps a marriage stay strong over time. A tech entrepreneur's refreshingly 'analog' answer to a world that can leave couples more digitally connected and personally disconnected than ever."
— Tony & Alisa DiLorenzo, hosts of the ONE Extraordinary Marriage podcast
"At a moment of dizzying technological change, this book reminds us to pay attention to what matters most... Distilling decades of insights into ten easy-to-follow steps, it shares practical advice I wish I had received long ago. It's an essential read."
— Kai Falkenberg, The Guardian
Thirty-three years ago, an exhausted young lawyer almost canceled dinner with the manager of gangster rap icons N.W.A. Instead, he forced himself off the couch, walked into a Beverly Hills café, and met the love of his life. That single decision sparked a 30-year marriage, two grown children who still choose to go to Coachella with their parents, and an enduring realization: lasting relationships don't happen by accident. You build the architecture for them. He calls it Active Serendipity: getting off the couch to open up possibilities, then committing to them again and again.
Tech entrepreneur, former studio executive, and author of the acclaimed Fearless Media, Peter Csathy turns relationship wisdom into immediately actionable steps (the "Secrets") that busy professionals and couples can actually take, including:
Analog living: practical steps for reclaiming your dinner table, your bedroom, and your family time from screens and AI noise.
Dream big: why taking risks together, even ones that fail, can make your marriage and your life richer.
The Top Five list: how to stop living on "marital cruise control" by ranking, with your partner, what actually matters.
Decide in advance: why willpower alone fails as a strategy for fidelity, and how to set guardrails long before temptation appears.
The Experience Calendar: why shared experiences and family rituals keep paying off for years, while "stuff" just depreciates.
Get a dog (seriously): how dogs lower stress, protect your heart, and bring families closer.
Grounded in the latest research from leading experts, including Dr. Robert Waldinger, Dr. John Gottman, Jonathan Haidt, Gretchen Rubin, and Priya Parker, each chapter ends with "News You Can Use": five actionable steps you can take today.
Knowing what matters is never the hard part. Doing is the hard part.
Look up from the screen, get off the couch, and discover the secrets hiding in plain sight.
P.S. When Csathy finally gave his wife the book, her reaction wasn't what he expected. That story is the book's candid final page.
Hardcover
Published October 9, 2026
About the author
Peter Csathy
6 books5 followersPeter Csathy is a renowned expert and business force in the worlds of entertainment, media, AI and tech. He's written several critically acclaimed books, including "Fearless Media" which VARIETY calls "a must read" and "brilliant." Peter's new book is "Hiding in Plain Sight: 10 Secrets to a Happy Marriage & Family" which THE GUARDIAN calls "an essential read" and the ONE Extraordinary Marriage podcast says "brings a fresh perspective to the conversation."
Most of all, Peter is a proud husband, father, brother, son-in-law, and dog owner. He lives with his wife, Luisa, in Southern California. On any given weekend, you can find Peter and his family at a major musical festival, outside pop-up DJ experience, Sprinter van road trip – or simply chilling and walking their dogs Cooper and Zeppy on one of San Diego’s beautiful beaches. And on any given weekday, you can find Peter at his desk, absorbed in inspiring music and his latest deal and creative endeavor.
When he's not with his family, Peter is Chairman of Creative Media and advises entertainment and AI companies. He also serves as CEO of Deep Cuts Media, where he represents iconic artists in music catalog transactions. Peter is a graduate of Harvard Law School and began his career as an entertainment attorney representing artists ranging from Madonna to ground-breaking rap group N.W.A.
In praise of Peter’s previous book "Fearless Media":
“A must-read … brilliant and compelling” – VARIETY
“Compelling, entertaining” – LOS ANGELES TIMES
“An invaluable guide to the new media universe” - FORBES
“Lively and informative. A great guide to the ‘tech-tonic’ shifts to come” – DEADLINE
“Approachable and enlightening” – THE MOTLEY FOOL
“Peter is one of the smartest guys in new media” – USA TODAY
Most of all, Peter is a proud husband, father, brother, son-in-law, and dog owner. He lives with his wife, Luisa, in Southern California. On any given weekend, you can find Peter and his family at a major musical festival, outside pop-up DJ experience, Sprinter van road trip – or simply chilling and walking their dogs Cooper and Zeppy on one of San Diego’s beautiful beaches. And on any given weekday, you can find Peter at his desk, absorbed in inspiring music and his latest deal and creative endeavor.
When he's not with his family, Peter is Chairman of Creative Media and advises entertainment and AI companies. He also serves as CEO of Deep Cuts Media, where he represents iconic artists in music catalog transactions. Peter is a graduate of Harvard Law School and began his career as an entertainment attorney representing artists ranging from Madonna to ground-breaking rap group N.W.A.
In praise of Peter’s previous book "Fearless Media":
“A must-read … brilliant and compelling” – VARIETY
“Compelling, entertaining” – LOS ANGELES TIMES
“An invaluable guide to the new media universe” - FORBES
“Lively and informative. A great guide to the ‘tech-tonic’ shifts to come” – DEADLINE
“Approachable and enlightening” – THE MOTLEY FOOL
“Peter is one of the smartest guys in new media” – USA TODAY
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