我在印度, 接近天堂也看見地獄

by Bob Miglani, 鮑伯·米格拉尼, 呂玉嬋 (Translator)

人們總是追求穩定、精確、效率和周詳計畫，期盼每件事都在掌控之中，但如果你走一趟印度，將對於奮力驅逐的「混亂」，有全新的解讀和定義。

印度逾十二億人口住在只有美國三分之一的領土上，這個國家的混亂和擁擠，簡直可以「瘋狂」來形容。然而，在一項國際評比「幸福星球指數」，印度的幸福度卻遠高於美國。本書作者鮑伯．米格拉尼在全世界最競爭的城市~紐約工作，卻在號稱全世界最混亂的國家~印度，找到人生方向。印度，這個看似紛亂、煩雜的國家，究竟藏著什麼幸福祕密？跟隨鮑伯走向印度，在紛雜事物中，重整「心」秩序，發現快樂真相及內在的靜定力量。

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help, Business, Travel, Memoir, Psychology

208 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2013

Reviews

[Margo Kelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love the subtitle of this book "How India Taught Me to Stop Overthinking and Start Living." ... In fact it was the subtitle that hooked me. The actual title, EMBRACE THE CHAOS, turned me off a bit. I don't want to embrace the chaos, even after reading the book! I want peace in my life. As much peace as I can possibly get. So I read the book with a bit of an attitude, struggling against the author's idea of embracing chaos ... but then I had to stop and laugh at myself as I read it, because there I was "overthinking" while reading a book about how to stop overthinking. Sheesh.

This book is a short easy read. It's certainly not a manual about rocket science, and I wasn't struck by any epiphanies while reading it, but I enjoyed the stories (modern day parables) about India.

There were several great points that struck a chord with me:

"It all works out in the end. Just accept it." (page xvi)

"What I'm suggesting is not that we sit back and give up on life but that we in fact work harder on the things that we can control: our own words, thoughts, and actions. By making a choice to redirect our frequently wasted effort to control others or the conditions around us, by refocusing that intense passion on our own actions, living in each precious moment, we can begin to move forward into a life we want." (page 3)

“What I had missed … in my search for the presence of God, I discovered only when I was forced to let go of the plans I had made, when I stopped trying to understand why things went wrong and simply accepted it. Instead, I found that presence hidden inside the generosity and kindness of those who notice our effort and help us on our journey …” (page 27)

“I became happier the moment I stopped putting my attention on others. … What I work on changing is me.” (page 86)

However, there were also quite a few religious/spiritual points I disagreed with:

“We have been living in the fabric of chaos all our lives, without realizing it. Chaos determines our birth; our meeting of friends, partners, and colleagues; and some of life’s greatest experiences.” (page 101)

“When you pray to God … Does He answer you? … No … God doesn’t answer.” (page 115)

So if you’re looking for spiritual enlightenment, I would not recommend this book. Instead I would recommend HEARING THE VOICE OF THE LORD by Gerald Lund.

And if you’re looking for a deep, thought-provoking book about how to improve the quality of your life, I would recommend THE FOUR AGREEMENTS by Don Miguel Ruiz.

But if you’re looking for a light, easy-to-read, and interesting book that you can read on the airplane or in the doctor’s office or waiting in the carpool line … and learn a few things about how to stop overthinking, THIS is the book for you.

Bob Miglani shows his personal insecurities while sharing his stories of India, and his humble approach impressed me. I really enjoyed reading this book.

[David Kinchen · Rating 5 out of 5]

BOOK REVIEW: 'Embrace the Chaos': Accepting Life's Challenges with Minimum Stress



God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time --"The Serenity Prayer" by Reinhold Niebuhr



* * *

Que sera, sera

Whatever will be, will be

The future's not ours to see

Que sera, sera

What will be, will be ---"Que sera, sera", sung by Doris Day in the 1956 Alfred Hitchcock movie "The Man Who Knew Too Much"



* * *

I wasn't too far into Bob Miglani's "Embrace the Chaos: How India Taught Me to Stop Overthinking and Start Living" (Berrett-Koehler Publishers, San Francisco, 168 pages, $16.95, index, foreword by Richard Leider; available from Amazon.com, Powell's, and other online sources) when I had an "aha!" moment -- realizing that I had been unconsciously -- or not -- following the advice the author learned on visits to his native country, India.

Now in his 40s, Miglani was a child when his parents moved to New Jersey, and like many from his country, bought a business, a Dairy Queen, in the case of the Miglani family.

Like many of us -- the reviewer included in spades -- Bob Miglani felt overwhelmed and anxious. He worried constantly about his job in New York City, his finances, and his family’s future, including how to pay for the education of his two children.

Life seemed so uncertain and unpredictable, but the more he tried to control it, the more stress he felt. It was a chance invitation to India, the land of his birth, that finally freed him.

"The Serenity Prayer" reminded me of the times I accompanied an alcoholic friend to AA meetings, lending support to a man, much as helping hands gave support to Bob Miglani on his trips to India. The Doris Day rendition (remember, she was the "Girl Singer" with big bands before she became an actress) of "Que Sera, Sera" encompassed many of the "embrace the chaos" messages of Miglani's book.

We followed Doris's advice when we left California in 1992 for West Virginia without job prospects in a state with a high unemployment rate. Everything worked out on a small circulation newspaper and I discovered I could live without the chaos and uncertainty of working for a big metropolitan newspaper. Stress melted away. Everything wasn't always hunky-dory, but we survived and even thrived. We're doing fine in Texas, where we've lived since the summer of 2008.

"Embrace the Chaos" is an easy read: I finished it in about an hour, in one sitting, but the messages the author provides will stay with you for a lifetime.

One message that resonated with me was from Miglani's dad (Page 105):

"Don't you get it? You were born by chance. And you have been living in a world full of chance. Why are you so afraid of something that brought you into this world in the first place?"

India, Miglani writes, is “the capital of chaos”: 1.2 billion people living on one-third the space of the United States, a bewildering mix of different languages, religions, customs, cultures, and castes. And yet somehow things get done and people are generally happy.

India made Miglani realize that you simply have to accept “the unpredictable, uncertain, imperfect, and complicated nature of life.” Instead of fighting it, Miglani learned to use his energy on what he could control—his own actions, words, and thoughts. However, thinking too much is just another way of trying to control the chaos. Instead of endlessly pondering possibilities, Miglani found it was better to take action, even imperfectly—to move forward, make mistakes, trust his intuition, find his purpose.

Miglani tells funny and moving stories of his trips to India, the people he met there, and what each encounter taught him. The stories are funny, but they contain valuable messages.

Some examples:

> What happens when you find yourself in an Indian village with no money and a plane to catch?

> How can an educated urban woman choose the man she is going to marry based on one or two meetings?

> What keeps a rural Indian health worker motivated despite the enormous need and such limited ability to help?

> What does trying to catch an insanely overcrowded Indian bus teach you about perfection?

Embracing the chaos, Miglani writes, “is a wonderfully freeing experience that opens us up to new, fresh possibilities. It leads us down paths we never would have walked on, introducing us to new people, new opportunities, and some of the best experiences in our life. It brings out strengths we never knew existed inside of us.”

It sounds like a cliché, but a guru in India gave this advice (Page 114) to Miglani: "…the answer to all of your questions, the answer to which path to take forward, is always inside of you. It is not with-out but with-in."

Summing up: A wonderful advice book that I will keep next to me at all times.

[Donna · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good reminder to savor the simple things, be present, let things go through stories of adventures in India. I had the opportunity to travel to India a couple of years ago, so I could clearly relate to the stories. A good quick read.

[Effy Zhang · Rating 4 out of 5]

Simple idea...hilarious written by American-Indian...

[Em · Rating 2 out of 5]

It was a pleasant read. It was a quick read. The message is well worth considering seriously.
However, I felt I got the same message from watching The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2011), this being more like an essay written (2013) post-movie, sharing many of the same quotes and philosophies.
This book didn't take into consideration the situation of women in India as far as taking risks and going with the flow - the catching the bus chapter comes to mind as one example, which was a missed opportunity. Women couldn't do some of the things the author used as examples in the book, freedoms men take for granted.
I enjoyed the explanation of some details in the Indian wedding which gave further depth to the wedding scenes in The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel to someone unfamiliar with Hindu wedding traditions.

[Kyle Govert · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wonderful insights

I really enjoyed this book. While it did not say a lot of mantras of topics that I haven't heard before, the stories were authentic and heartfelt. I flew through the book and recommend it to others as a great look at other cultures and a positive push into the world of managing stress and chaos.

[Russel · Rating 4 out of 5]

We dont have a lot of control over our family, friends or jobs. But we have control over our thoughts, words and actions. The authors message is universal and relevant.

[Patricia Chen · Rating 4 out of 5]

It’s a nice book that introduces Indian culture and also the concept to adjust yourself to “chaos life.”

[Michelle Payne · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. Quick easy to read and helpful.

[Kaitelyn · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book is quite entertaining. It is not all about what happened in India, but about how one can deal with chaos and surprises in his daily life.

[Martijn · Rating 4 out of 5]

What I like it that with each chapter he starts with the lesson he learned, followed by an anecdote that lead him to it.

[Charlotte · Rating 5 out of 5]

A simple quick read divided into short chapters of events in India - I enjoyed the book and chuckled a few times at the author’s sharing of his inner thoughts.

[Miriam Downey · Rating 3 out of 5]

Read my full review here: http://mimi-cyberlibrarian.blogspot.c...

Bob Miglani was born in India but raised in the United States. In Embrace the Chaos, he describes the contrast between life in the United States and life in India--life in a place where all is controlled chaos and life in a place where there is no attempt to control the chaos. The introduction tells it all: "You have less control than you think. Get over it." Miglani is a businessman, and the book is his philosophical look at India and is his attempt to relate what he has learned from Indian life to over-programmed Americans.

The book is divided into two parts: Accept and Don't Overthink. Each section is filled with short vignettes that tell the truths of life from an Indian perspective. Miglani intersperses each story with pithy sayings and observations. The stories are charming. There is a delightful story about a disrupted plane ride, another about a simple, but joyful birthday party, and another about a crazy Indian wedding. In each story, Miglani relates the truth that he found from that experience, a truth that will work to calm and enlighten driven Americans. He says, for example: "Worrying about what's coming next will make you miss the best times of your life." The message of another story is: "I realized that although parts of India's landscape may appear changed on the surface, its citizens' deep reservoir of acceptance for the imperfections of life hadn't changed."

This is a charming little book that I would not have known about if the publicist hadn't sent it to me. We have all heard the messages of Embrace the Chaos at other times and in other formats. It was a pleasure to read the messages once again connected to such delightful stories. It made me want to go to India and try out some of that chaos.

I'm about to read another bit of Indian philosophy in the new book The Lowland by Jhumpa Lahiri . It is one of this year's most anticipated books.

Bob Miglani's blog and website: http://www.embracethechaos.com/

[Christie Machelle Gibson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was able to enjoy this book thanks to a free copy I was able to receive due to Goodreads. Absolutely a must read for anyone who needs to be reminded of what is most important in life before it passes by. From Miglani's bus ride to the wedding that did not go as planned, their is a lesson to be learned in these anxiety induced situations. Miglani explains it to us best, when he tells us to "Embrace the Chaos". I laughed and shed a tear or two. Also, picked up on some fatherly wisdom along the way. No matter your book preference, I guarantee you will love this book and open your heart to what is truly real along the way.

[Maxwell · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is a nice reflection on how chaotic our lives have become through the eyes of one man and his travels in India.
Each chapter teaches a different lesson alongside an anecdote from his travels.
Very quick read. If you're interested in hearing more about another culture while being able to learn from it and apply that to you're life, I'd recommend it.
His writing style is very relatable, anecdotal, easy to read.

[Devyn · Rating 2 out of 5]

I received this book via Goodreads.

I really enjoyed the stories in Embrace the Chaos. They make me want to visit India! But the advice and such nearly bore me to tears. Perhaps that's just because I'm young and haven't experienced half of life's stress and anxiety yet. Maybe if I read it again in five years I'll emphasize with it more.

[Olwen · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an amazing little book! I thoroughly enjoyed exploring with the author how much the fluidity and acceptance of life in India contrasts so much with Western culture need for control, surety, order. As a fellow control freak type-A personality I could see how learning to 'embrace the chaos' like they do in India could help me enjoy life more and stress less!

[Joan · Rating 5 out of 5]

'Things will work out in the end. If they haven't worked out, it isn't the end!' goes a great line in the charming movie The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. This book is similarly sweet, cheerful, and uplifting. Instead of directing your actions, Bob Miglani gently leads you along a path that he has taken, sharing his past anxiety and progress towards a more mindful life.

[Gaurav Prasade · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thats how we survive in this chaos. Never thought I could relate to any analysis done on this obstacles race; that you are expected to complete with speed, called Life. But still we fight and survive with a smile.

Do Read!

[Michael Olesen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. There were a few quotes in it worth keeping and have the manifesto posted at my desk.

[Nita Vanhoose · Rating 4 out of 5]

I purchased this the day after i returned from a 3 week volunteer trip in India- and if really gave me perspective on what I had encountered there. It made my heart entirely happy.

[Nikhil Chandran]

nice one

[Nakia]

I really stepped out of my comfort zone, in terms of genre. I really enjoyed this book, there were tons of quotes that I'm going to take with me in life.