Progress

Progress #1

by Amalie Silver

Jesse

I admit, I didn’t think much of Charlie at first. She was rounder than the girls who usually caught my eye. Not my type. But when I saw her sitting in that booth alone, for the first time something in my mind or my instincts or my heart told me to join her.

She defied me.
She challenged me.
She gave me hope.
Before I knew it, moving forward was my only option.

Charlie

I couldn’t tell you when it happened, but it had to have been a gradual change; I never moved too quickly.

If someone would have told me earlier that year what I was going to go through, I wouldn't have believed them.

Jesse was so different from anyone I’d met before. And everyone I’ve met since. He sucked all the life out of me, in the best—and worst—ways.

We don’t get strong overnight. For most of us it takes time. Strength isn’t measured by how high and fast our walls go up, but how easily we can watch them fall.


Warning: This book contains material that might be a trigger for some readers. Abuse and rape are implied, but not described in detail. Discretion is advised.

Genres: Romance, New Adult, Dark, Contemporary, Abuse, Contemporary Romance, Mental Health

Paperback

First published January 15, 2016

About the author

I spend way more time on social media than I care to admit. Find me here:
https://www.facebook.com/amaliesilver

Reviews

[Jennifer Kyle · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars

"Jesse and I would always be opposites. Two people connected in the unlikeliest of ways. Contrary to forces acting complementarily. Fire and water. Absent and present. Dead and alive. Light and dark. Always and never."



Charlie, the heroine is a very relatable character who is overweight, sweet, and completely lovable. Throughout the story she losses a ton of weight and makes great "progress" in finding her self-worth. This is the story of her relationship that at times wasn't even a friendship, with a manic depressed, nasty, beautiful in looks guy, named Jesse Anders.

"...he's really a good guy. Well, sort of. Um, I guess he's kind of a dick sometimes-"



The two meet at their job, a restaurant called the Crimson Cellar. Both characters are in their twenties and the story is told in Charlie's pov, Jesse's pov and then alternating povs. To be honest, Jesse's issues didn't blanket or exonerate the words that could come out of his mouth and I frankly couldn’t stand him.

"You'll always be the fat girl who thought she meant something to me. You just couldn't be the girl who fucked me and left me alone."



The story starts out strong and then gets so slow. I found myself exhausted by the once a week to once a month contact and put this book down to read another. I then returned to see how the author ended their story. I was pleasantly surprised with the ending.

"I'd survived twenty-three years of ridicule to finally experience what it was like to be beautiful. I'd carried the weight of a million insults on my shoulders to finally know what it felt like to be desired. I don't know if I truly believed myself until he pulled me into his room. It was the validation I'd always needed. A beautiful, broken bully loved me. He saw me for who I was, not what I looked like."

I found the ending fitting for their relationship/non-relationship. To my surprise, I then read Progress:Interrupted will be continuation of this story. I'm pretty positive at this point that if book two was currently available, I wouldn't be one clicking. Still you never know perhaps the characters will stalk me after I write this review and I'll be interested in seeing what happens next.

*ARC provided by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review*

[NiCoLeTa E. {Addicted To Books} · Rating 4 out of 5]

***4 - 4,5 "Broken" stars***



I finished this book and I was staring with blank eyes the screen of my laptop.
What i did just read??? And why everything turned out so fucked up???
I still have this painful squeezing inside my chest and my eyes are refusing to dry...

And I'm still feelling so wrecked emotionally after this story and i'm really wondering if there is salvation for our heroes!!!
Will they manage to make a progress with themselves together and seperated????
What the fuck happened at the end??? And before the end???
Scratch that!!!
What the hell happened generally in the whole book???

(Okay, i din't throw my kindle away, but i was this close!!!)
Where was the progress???
Yep, there was a little progress, but stil everything were so fucked up!!!
Damn! I feel fucked up myself after that story...
My mind can't accept the whole situation... Damn me!!! Damn them!!!


Well, the book was separated by three parts...
**In the first part we had Charlie's voice...
Charlie was an overweight girl that had faced a lot of bullying in the past and in the present as well. She was scared of the people and life in general.
She had low self-respect and she didn't appreciate herself at all!

In the present she just started to work as a hostess to a restaurant and there she met Jesse, a collegue of hers that intrigued her very much!
Jesse wasn't like the other guys around her. He accepted her as who she were and he was treating her "almost" with kindness... As it was natural, she fell for him... hard.
But Jesse seems to seek just friendship from her... And she accepted it!!!

The thing is that Jesse was frustrating and unpredictable...
Something strange was going on with him...
He couldn't concentrate, he was changing topics from nowhere, he was acting weird and wild...
And many times, he was treating Charlie with malice but she always forgave him.

The thing is that Charlie was starting to change because of Jesse...

"I wanted to be somebody.
I wanted to be somebody to him."

**The second part was with Jesse's voice...

That part, i think that broke my heart mostly... Don't get me wrong! Charlie's situation made me sad and angry, but Jesse's was worst!!!
It was so difficult and painful to be inside his head.
I witness from first hand where his situation was leading him and my heart was aching for this broken man. I wanted so badly to soothe him and i couldn't handle all this pain!!!

I don't know why but i loved his character. He was so difficult to figure him out and his behavior was so foreign, but i think that now i understand what was happening inside his head. And it was chaos and destruction!
I saw what his chaotic mind made him do especially toward Charlie, who was the only person that he was truly caring.

Charlie was the light in his darkness... But he couldn't aloud her to enter in his shitty reality as a woman and preffered to hold her close to him as a friend because he needed her presence by his side.
He didn't want to hurt her, but he was doing it. And that was so sad and heartbreaking!


"Chasing fairy tales never got me anywhere...
Charlie is far too bright of a star for me to chase."

**The third part was the most difficult part and we had both Charlie's and Jesse's voices...
And it was painful...

They were running all the time around each other and even though they could have something great, they just hurting each other.
And that end just broke my heart and pissed me off at the same time.
I think that they are so deep on their own shits that they never truly realized what they meant to each other...
They were two broken people and they broke each other more even though they had to fix each other...


"Jesse and I would always be opposites. Two people connected in the unlikeliest of ways.
Contrary forces acting complimentary.
Fire and water.
Absent and present. Dead and alive.
Light and dark. Always and never."

Well, i liked very much the two main characters even though that they made me a total mess!!!

I liked Charlie. She was kind and sweet and fiesty in some moments.... But i hated how she was feeling about herself!!!
I felt so sad about her insecurities and i wanted to tell her that she was beautiful no matter what. She had a beautiful soul and that is what it matters the most!!!
I liked that with timid steps she learnt how to be more confident with herself...
But i didn't like her at the end... I know that she had enough with Jesse's attitude, but i think that she was afraid of him to love her back.
It terrified her and that's why she acted like that at the end...


"I couldn't let it go. I couldn't just be comfortable with him. The sting of his touch hurt worse than the sting of his words, and I wasn't sure why or what I could do about it. Instinctively, I should've listen to what my body told me: Jesse Anders was toxic."

As for Jesse??? He was having serious problems... Just thinking about him and his fucked up thoughts, my eyes filled with tears... At this moment!!!
Yep, he was acting like a real asshole most of the time, but when he let his vulnerability to show, i just wanted to wash away his pain.

He didn't trust people and he had good reasons for that and yep, he was a real dick to Charlie many times, but his feelings for her were strong...
But he had too much shits on his plate that he had to figure out...
For the only thing that I'm feeling really sorry is that Charlie couldn't see inside Jesse's head!!!
Then everything could be so good!!!
Because her insecurities made her not to trust him and that sucked!


"She defied me.
She challenged me.
She gave me hope.
Before I knew it, moving forward was my only option."

Please, please tell me that we will have a progress with those two in the next book.
I don't think that my heart could handle more pain than already had witnessed!!!
Please Amalie, fix those two broken souls!!!


***ARC generously provided via NetGalley for the exchange of an honest review***

[Brandi · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars



To be honest, I have no idea how I feel about this story. It was a fairly quick read, it was well-written and the pacing, for the most part was good. My struggle was with the story line, and the characters. Progress tells the story of Charlie, a 22 year old, hostess with a weight problem and Jesse, a 25 year old delivery guy, who has a shopping list of issues. These two meet at the Crimson Cellar, the restaurant where they work, and a strange friendship is formed. Charlie is crushing on Jesse, and he in turn...mainly treats her like shit, with the occasional sprinkling of kindness.

"It seems you've got enough problems of your own," he said, his eyes flickering from my breast to my hips and back up again.
"What do you mean by that?" I whispered.
He shook his head, then slowly but chastely kissed my cheek. "You're a big girl, Charlie. You figure it out."

Yeah. Jesse is a real sweet guy. So between him saying whatever asinine thing pops in his head, and Charlie beating herself up for not being thin, most of this story was rather depressing for me.

Beautiful boys like him didn't hang out with ugly girls like me. No matter his candor. I couldn't ignore that I knew he was better than me. And that I should've considered it a privilege he was still there.

Throughout the story Charlie loses a large amount of weight and finds some self worth/confidence, while Jesse struggles with his issues and finds himself becoming more and more reliant on Charlie.

"I don't want to make you go away again," I said, interrupting whatever she had been rambling about. "You're somebody to me," I continued. "You're sweet and kind and generous. I can't lose you, Red. I just can't. Don't let me regret this night." I bent over, holding the sting in my gut. " Don't leave me."

Fat shaming, dysfunctional relationships, mental disorders - this one has some intense subject matter. Bringing me to my biggest issue, Charlie is portrayed as seeing the best in people, and always being kind, where Jesse thinks everyone is an asshole, and is just waiting for people to disappoint him - then in the end, the new and improved Charlie acts callously when Jesse finally has the courage to tell her his truth. Not to say, Jesse's previous behavior was warranted or okay, I just don't know how I feel about it...

I was going to use him.

Overall, this story left me confused, and I still don't know how I feel. But, I assume it is just the beginning of a journey, and this installment is about finding self worth, learning to stand up for yourself, and that love is fucking complicated.

"Jesse and I would always be opposites. Two people connected in the unlikeliest of ways. Contrary to forces acting complimentary. Fire and water. Absent and present. Dead and alive. Light and dark. Always and never."

*ARC provided by Netgalley in exchange for an honest review*

[Patrycja · Rating 3 out of 5]

Title: Progress
Series: Yes. The continuation of the story is planned.
Author: Amalie Silver
Release Date: 15 January, 2016
Rating: 2.5 stars - 3 stars
Cliffhanger:. No
HEA: Yes

"I wanted to be somebody.

I wanted to be somebody to him."

Charlie is 22 years old and she has a problem with weight. She feels terrible in her own body; she lacks of confidence, self worth and respect. She's working in a restaurant where she meets 25 year old Jesse, a very handsome delivery guy. She instantly starts to crush on him. They develop 'weird' sort of friendship - sometimes Jesse acts very nice toward her other times he hurts her. It happens over and over again.

Progress is one of those books that left me confused (sad maybe?) and not exactly sure if I liked what I've read.

Even though some time has passed since I reached the end my thoughts are still over the place. I am not 100% convinced by this story. It wasn't a bad - I would say it was very interesting and relatable novel and given different circumstances I might have enjoyed it more, but it was just not what I've been looking for. Too many depressing thoughts and feelings.

"Jesse and I would always be opposites.
Two people connected in the unlikeliest of ways.
Contrary forces acting complimentary.
Fire and water.
Absent and present.
Dead and alive.
Light and dark.
Always and never."

My main issue with Amalie Silver's book was with the constant fat shaming and lack of confidence and self worth of the main character, which was very tiring and depressing. I have enough of body image issues in real life to deal with them in books. In my stories I need a heroine who's confident even when imperfect.

"Beautiful boys like him didn't hang out with ugly girls like me. No matter his candor. I couldn't ignore that I knew he was better than me. And that I should've considered it a privilege he was still there. "

Sorry, but Charlie annoyed me, made me gloomy and frankly she made it hard for me to keep on reading. Fortunately as the story progressed Charlie started to grow up and see herself in better light. I wanted to scream at Charlie - 'GROW SOME BALLS, LADY!'

All in all, Progress is very emotional read. It's messy, confusing and depressing, yet it holds much potential. I believe that readers who tend to enjoy books that deal with toxic relationships, characters with problems and slow burn romance will be pleasantly surprised with it.





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[Wendy'sThoughts · Rating 4 out of 5]

4 Real Life, Real Feelings Examined Stars * * * *
We read many different types of romance...but really, how real are they...
Will I ever be having that cute meet with the billionaire...
or will I be "workin' it" with a MC from the Motorcycle Club...
or even land that terrific position that just sounds perfect only to discover my last blow out, hook up is now my boss...

Nope, don't think so.
This story is none of that.

This story is more about real life and people who actually exist. With real life issues. Maybe things you have experienced or others you know have....
Like being bullied and made to feel less than because of your physical size. Because being overweight is the last bigotry which still seems safe to call out. Where making someone feel like they aren't worthy is ok ...cause it makes you feel better about how you are not that...
Because really bullies are really scared little children constantly afraid of everything... and lash out to inflict the harm they fear the most.

Our main character Charlie has never had a safe place. Her family seems to care and doesn't force any issues. They know of the school bullying Charlie experienced and offered that once she was through high school things would get better. Maybe that could have been her parents' experience and that was all they knew...but unfortunately, all the damage had been done and she carried those deep scars forward.

Charlie sees herself in a number of ways; she is caring and a glass half full type, remarkably. She is the one all talk to for she will listen and give honest, sincere advise. She is everyone's friend but also is alone. She has endured the cuts and taunts from those who think it is funny to set up a girl and then slam her open heart. Charlie has reached that place where she no longer trusts; she will be pleasant, do her hostess job, have a drink or two with co workers at the bar and then home.
It is safer that way.

Jesse is the delivery guy who is too old to be doing this job. At 25, he has jumped around, gotten a reputation for hitting and scoring with whomever he smiles at and has that casual, funky cool just short of not. He works at the same place Charlie does and her first interaction with him leaves a huge lasting impression. A customer for a take out order was being a bitch to Charlie; she was dismissive and out and out rude. As Charlie is handling it and just wanting the woman to leave, Jesse comes up and shows the mistake on the order was his fault, nothing involving Charlie. Enamored with the looks of Jesse, the woman warms and then stomps away.

Charlie is struck; she is having trouble breathing and fighting off a panic attack, which has happened in the past for her. Jesse says hey and Charlie hides her nervousness and the connection of sorts happens between them. She will not be able to stop thinking of him and he will be confused by how the look in her eyes felt like she was really seeing him deep inside.

Jesse is not use to that. Jesse was bounced around in foster families for a while before he landed in one that worked. He carries serious pain from his own family and then events after. Jesse is a troubled soul... but more than that, Jesse has internal demons which all of us fear....the inability to fight them without medication. This medication changes how he feels things. When he is on his meds...he isn't the true him, just more "manageable"...but cloudy and not real....and that is the constant battle for Jesse...Emotions, disappointment, anything can set off the desire to stop taking them.

And when he does...the Ugly comes out along with the Highs and Lows.

This story of two people crossing paths and how they are somehow bonded together is not an easy one. There are moment which are good, sweet even and empowering for Charlie. She starts a journey she isn't even aware of until she is deep into feeling good about her actions. She see positive results in her everyday life and we are happy to cheer that part on. Yet as positive as these results are, Charlie knows it only takes a moment for it to all slip away... for she still feels deep down she is not worthy of any happiness or love. After all, that is what has been drilled into her for so long.

Jesse has found in Charlie a lifeline of sorts. He is attracted to her for her... the essence of good but at the same time fights his need to always lash out.

This book was not an easy read. It was written extremely well and gave us three sections for us to feel all of it through both characters intimately. The first part is Charlie's POV, the second Jesse's and then the last through both. It was intense, not pretty and not tied up with a bow.
But that is the way of real life, right....
There are three books to this series and the next one will be coming shortly.
Right now Progress is available on NetGalley. https://s2.netgalley.com/catalog/book...

A gifted copy was provided by author for an honest review.

For more Reviews, Free E-books and Giveaways

[Claire · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 - "We waited too long." Stars!

I think Progress is going to possibly be a book that readers either love or hate to some extent, due to its story line and characterizations.



I think the main thing that struck a chord with me whilst reading Progress is that a huge amount of the things Charlie went through are also experiences I have dealt with and lived through myself. This association is probably why the book resonated so strongly.

I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to be somebody to him.

This is the first book I have read by Amalie Silver, although she has been highly recommended to me in the past. So I went in with no expectations. And the first thing that strikes you very quickly as you are reading is that the story isn’t your standard, boy-meets-girl-and-they-fall-in-love one.

"Some things you just can’t come back from. Not when you’ve gotten a glimpse of how great things could be."

Its complex, dark, a little uncomfortable to read in places, I got a upset a couple of times for the things Charlie went through, and being in Jesse’s head is definitely not all unicorns and rainbows. But that is the nature of this book, and although at some points it gets a little repetitive, for me that was one of the things that kept me reading, to see if Charlie could pull herself out of the cycle that she had gotten herself into with Jesse.

Knowing my own fragility didn’t make me any stronger.

Because although Jesse, was on a perpetual hamster wheel dealing with his own recurring issues again and again, as well as expecting those around him to deal with the fall-out each time, it was the story from Charlie’s perspective and her interactions with him at the different stages of his mind-set and her own life changes, that held me in its grip.



It’s hard to put this book in the category of romance at the moment, because there is very little in the way of romance in it. There are a few situations and conversations where it is undoubtedly obvious that this is a couple that feel deeply for each other, but that said they both seem to offer up everything that the other person least needs in their life at any given moment in the book.

"When we’re together, it’s just you and me… No one else matters, do they?"

This is definitely the beginning of Jesse and Charlie’s story. Progress: Interrupted is noted as due for release in February at the end of the book, (which I hope is the case). I am interested to see if the author can give this couple the peace and comfort together that they both deserve, or whether their paths end up going in different directions and separately.

Our story isn’t over yet…

ARC generously provided by the author, and it was an absolute pleasure to provide the above honest review.

[Anastasia · Rating 2 out of 5]

2/5 stars

Trigger Warning: rape, abuse, bullying, mental-illness, body shaming

Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

Progress is the first installment in a series about self discovery.

Jesse
I admit, I didn’t think much of Charlie at first. She was rounder than the girls who usually caught my eye. Not my type. But when I saw her sitting in that booth alone, for the first time something in my mind or my instincts or my heart told me to join her.
She defied me.
She challenged me.
She gave me hope.
Before I knew it, moving forward was my only option.

Charlie
I couldn’t tell you when it happened, but it had to have been a gradual change; I never moved too quickly.
If someone would have told me earlier that year what I was going to go through, I wouldn't have believed them.
Jesse was so different from anyone I’d met before. And everyone I’ve met since. He sucked all the life out of me, in the best—and worst—ways.
We don’t get strong overnight. For most of us it takes time. Strength isn’t measured by how high and fast our walls go up, but how easily we can watch them fall.

This book was so promising. The blurb was intriguing and the reviews and ratings on goodreads were amazing. So naturally I requested it on Netgalley. I decided to hold off on reading this romance because I wanted to read it during Valentine's Day weekend. That was a big mistake. Talk about a book that makes you lose your faith in love. I really thought about dnfing this book at 33% but I thought that would be unfair to the author. So, I continued on and yes I must give it to the author she did somewhat redeem herself near halfway through. Originally this rating was going to be a 1 star but I feel like some aspects helped it out and it made it to 2 stars by the skin of it’s teeth.

Charlie Johnson turned out to be a complex character. In the beginning her thoughts on body image and how she reacted to her surrounding made me nervous and queasy. She would call herself disgusting and ugly because of her weight even when everyone around her called her beautiful. In the beginning I understood why she thought this way, she’s a girl with insecurities. Everyone has them, some of us just focus on them more. On top of her insecurities she also had a huge case of anxiety and had to deal with bullying her whole life.
Jesse Anders was the worst love interest I have ever read about. Charlie is smitten with him even though he is rude to her. He basically fat shames her, blows up when she asks him a simple question and pushes on subjects he shouldn’t. Yes, I understand that Jesse had a horrible past and deals with a mental illness, but the doesn’t mean Charlie as to deal with the crap he throws at her. She just met this guy and she’s already falling head over heels just because he’s “beautiful and no beautiful people ever pay her any attention” but come on. This guy was bad news from the beginning.

Charlie decides to lose weight right after meeting Jesse because he could never love someone like her .

"I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to be somebody to him."

I’m fine with her taking charge of her life and deciding to do something this huge and life changing, but she did it all for the wrong reasons and lost the weight in the wrong way. She would starve herself and exercise three times a day. She lost 17 pounds in one week and according to an expert, Lauren Slayton, M.S., R.D, “you’re probably not going to be able to lose more than three or four pounds a week.” Yes, I know this is only one expert’s opinion but it just goes to show how she wasn’t living a healthy life.

This book was very repetitive. Charlie would say something to anger Jesse, Jesse would stomp away, they wouldn’t talk for weeks, they would meet again, they would pour their hearts out, and the cycle would begin again. There were also some questionable scenes. Such as when Jesse grabbed Charlie’s arm, twisted it behind her back, slammed her up against a glass door, and said repulsive things into her year. She ended up having a bleeding lip and a bruise on her wrist. To me I saw a lot of warning signs in their relationship that pointed towards abusive. And even her friends saw it! They told her to stay away from him and when she refused they were still wary of him, as they should be.

The book was in dual point of view. Part I was Charlie's POV, Part II was Jesse’s, and Part III was both. The change in POV was really jarring. Once you had gotten used to Charlie and invested in her mental health you were thrown into Jesse’s mind. And I have to say I was starting to feel a very small amount of compassion for Jesse at the end of Part I but right when we started Part II that was thrown out the window. He would call girls tricks, easy, and many more charming names. On a better note the book was well written. The story was fast paced and I can tell that Amalie Silver has talent. I just think this book wasn’t for me.

There were a few masterfully placed quotes or scenes that made me rethink my rating of two stars. They made me want to give it a better rating. But, one or two nice quotes doesn’t change the fact that I went through this book trying not to throw it across the room in frustration. Those few scenes were beautiful though and most of them came out of the rude and smug mouth of Jesse Anders. He spoke about how people aren’t grateful for what they are given. The problems that we cry over aren’t even close to what other people or feeling. Our problems are first world problems we should take a moment to think about all of the people dying of diseases, hunger, abandoned to die, or are used for their bodies every day.

Mental illness and abuse were also keep aspects in this book.

“Oh, you’re sad? Take a pill. Oh, you’re mad? Have a hit. Oh, you’re happy? Take another drink. Exist. And when that became too much to handle, numb it. Live. And when that became too much to cope with, numb it. Fight. And when that became too much to bear, numb it. Since when did living our lives become something we had to dull down?”

Mental illness is not something we should look over. It may be scary to speak or even think about but if you are feeling depressed, suicidal, anxiety, or are suffering from abuse, bullying, or any other crises please talk to someone, visit the websites below, or call a helpline. Please reach out to someone who can help.
United States Suicide Hotlines: http://www.suicide.org/suicide-hotlin...
International Suicide Hotlines: http://www.suicide.org/international-...
24 Hour Crisis Hotline: (212) 673-3000
National Domestic Violence Hotline: http://www.thehotline.org/
For many more crisis hotlines such as depression, suicidal thoughts, stress, anxiety, grief, bullying, and so much more: http://www.teenhealthandwellness.com/...

All in all I didn’t enjoy this book and I don’t plan on reading any more of this series. There is a slim change that I'll decide to pick up a different book written by this author.

[Jenny - TotallybookedBlog · Rating 4 out of 5]

‘Dreaming of the person I could be was detrimental to my emotional health. There was no end to that rabbit hole. It was dark and scary place.’

We loved the synopsis for Progress by Amalie Silver and couldn’t wait to get stuck in as we guessed it would be one hell of an emotional ride. And it was. We felt hugely morose as we quickly realised that this would pull at those deep rooted emotions as we’re sure many of you too can relate to some if not many of the issues evident in this story.

‘Never let them see you cry, Charlie.’

Bullying – name calling – low self-esteem and life experiences no one should have to live through. It made for hard reading and we have to admit that whilst we love realism and that all important connection to a character – we still like to escape into books to remove ourselves from real life. That is not a negative; rather it’s a positive. It felt too real at times.

‘I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to be somebody to him.’

It took a while for us to fully become engrossed in this story but Charlie and Jesse pulled us in and we felt so incredibly sorry for both. Never has two pov’s been more important as without Jesse’ we would have struggled with his character. Instead, we actually felt overwhelming sadness over his character.

Charlie has been bullied and treated appallingly her whole life. Her size has sparked horrendous taunts and treatment. Meeting Jesse, a co-worker and a complete man whore and arrogant sod changes her life. He becomes her crutch in many respects and the instigator for Charlie’s transformation.

“I frustrate you, right?” I whispered

“And I make you sad,” he said.

“I’m no one,” I retorted.

His eyes glossed over. “And I’m nothing.”

Jesse has had a very traumatic childhood and suffers from manic depression which means he loses grips with reality and himself. He’s painted as a male slapper, a bully and an all-round arsehole. Which he absolutely was in parts of this story. We quickly learnt that between Jesse and Charlie each hide behind a visible definition and stigma, both living within their heads putting up a front. A front determined by experiences as well as mental issues and thought processes.

‘Oh, you’re sad? Take a pill. Oh, you’re mad? Have a hit. Oh, you’re happy? Take another drink. Exist. And when that became too much to handle, numb it. Live. And when that became too much to cope with, numb it. Fight. And when that became too much to bear, numb it. Since when did living our lives become something we had to dull down?’

We were completely invested and rooted for Charlie and Jesse to heal each other and become more than the initial friends who saw an aspect of themselves in the other. However, sadly for us Charlie lost some of our respect and understanding when for us it seemed as if she herself becomes both a bully and martyr rolled into one. Yes, her initial addiction to Jesse spiralled her into an extreme weight loss with a consequential self-esteem boost, however her reason for why just didn’t convince us and her treatment of Jesse who himself was desperately trying to heal with the help of Charlie was devastatingly low. We just felt at a loss and so bloody sad.

‘I’d borrowed his courage and his confidence until I could build up enough inside me to go it alone. Everyone used a crutch when they needed one; mine was just more unconventional than the norm.’

Progress was beautifully and very well written highlighting the power of words and actions in regard to making another person feel inconsequential and worthless. What gives anyone the right to leave such an impression in someone else’s life through shaming them into despair and hiding? Progress was ugly, real and heart-breaking yet in some ways hopeful too. It felt very original and we have to applaud Amalie Silver for writing outside what can sometimes seem as cookie cutter fiction.

‘That’s what progress is all about. We arrive on the other side with the knowledge of how we got there, never forgetting the struggle. There’s always going to be a story behind massive change. That’s how beauty is created. The trick is remembering.’

♥ ♥ ♥



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[Annika · Rating 3 out of 5]

Oh, wow. What a powerful, heart-wrenching story. A story of two broken souls full of self-loathing on their painful journey to self-discovery and self-respect.
I ended up reading this book basically in one swoop.

Charlie's been overweight since she was a child. Two decades of verbal and emotional abuse have left her an insecure mess without an ounce of self-worth. When she meets Jesse, she immediately feels an odd pull towards him.

Beautiful boys like him didn't hang out with ugly girls like me. No matter his candor, I couldn't ignore that I knew he was better than me. And that I should've considered it a privilege he was still there.

Jesse suffers from bipolar disorder, resulting in severe mood swings and terrible depressions. He lost his faith in humanity and love a long time ago, but finds hope in the form of shy, kind-hearted Charlie.

My general outlook on life is pretty fucking abysmal. Sunflowers are nice. Cigarettes are good too. Beer, weed, a bike ride in the fall, Rx Bandits and Less Than Jake, laughing until your cheeks hurt, and Charlie: those are all good things.
The rest is shit.

In the course of a year, Charlie and Jesse develop the most dysfunctional and unhealthy friendship, while simultaneously finding solace in each other.

My chin quivered but I refused to cry. „I frustrate you, right?“ I whispered.
„And I make you sad,“ he said.
„I'm no one,“ I retorted.
His eyes glossed over. „And I'm nothing.“

There were times when I despised both Jesse and Charlie.
Jesse for more obvious reasons – he was a prick. He used his condition as an excuse to be a cruel SOB and insult and degrade Charlie who was nothing but kind to and supportive of him. He had no filter and didn't know or didn't care when it was time to shut the hell up. He wasn't good for Charlie. Not good for her and not good enough for her. It was hard to like him. But although he was toxic, he managed to unleash the will in Charlie to be more. More than the broken, bullied girl she used to be.
I despised Charlie because she was far too forgiving. I can't count the times the little voice in my head would scream „Walk away already! You're better than this!“ or „Please don't go to him, he doesn't deserve you!“. It was frustrating.
But then, there were times when I just got so overwhelmed with emotions. I wanted, no, I needed them to be together. To have the HEA those two damaged people deserved so much. It was painful.

This was a heavy and incredibly angsty read, full of drama and push-and-pull. I'm also not sure what to think of the ending. I would have lost any respect for Charlie if she'd forgiven Jesse again, but I hated her for playing with him, too.
I'm not sure if I'll be reading the sequel. This was a very depressing read and I'm not sure if I could stomach more of it.

I'm also a little worried about the message this book conveys. Even though she was told repeatedly by others that she was beautiful regardless of her weight, in the end Charlie developed her self-worth solely based on two things: her weight loss and the attention of men, Jesse in particular. While I was thrilled for her that she managed to overcome some of her indoctrinated self-hatred, I think it was for entirely wrong reasons. And that bugs me.

It's not supposed to be comfortable. It's supposed to tug, tear, pull your hair, beat you senseless, and challenge everything you know. It's supposed to tickle, it's supposed to rip your guts out and serve them to you on a platter.
That's what progress is all about. We arrive on the other side with the knowledge of how we got there, never forgetting the struggle.
There's always going to be a story behind massive change.
That's how beauty is created.
The trick is remembering.

ARC provided by the author via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

[Elle aka Leftie aka Shoebelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

*ARC received from author/publisher via Netgalley*

I'm a little upset at myself right after finishing this. How did I not notice "book one" right above the title?!?
Note to self: get better prescription.

This book... sigh...



... it was emotionally taxing, sigh...

I have 2 of Amalie’s books waiting to be read, Word Play and Four Play, 2 light funny reads if I recall some of my friends’ reviews here. Then the cover for this caught my eye. I love the cover! I quickly read the blurb, it didn’t sound funny, but hey, I’ve heard nothing but good things about Amalie’s other books.

After reading this, boy was I in for a surprise! And kinda’ glad in a way that it ended up being my 1st Amalie read. I’m thinking if she can write angst like this, then her funny ones must be really funny.

You get the story of Charlie and Jesse, 2 20-something folks with normal jobs in a pizza place. For whatever reason, they each caught each other’s attention and what began was a friendship, albeit tenuous. Charlie, for all her past experience, is tuned in to Jesse’s feelings. Jesse, on the other hand, doesn’t understand his pull towards Charlie. I wanted to say the friendship grows, but not really. As Charlie figures things out, so does Jesse.

Charlie and Jesse’s issues are very real. I can’t relate, but they’re issues one is bound to know well enough whether thru personal experience or those of other’s around. The inner struggle, the aftermath of cruel actions, surviving, the struggles of daily living when facing demons constantly, trying to stay on the right path… Is this really romance? Not sure… Doesn’t sound like it, does it? Yet it is, really.

Maybe it’s just me but the blurb did not prepare me for the heaviness of this book. A few times I’ve asked myself if I wanted to finish it, yet something in the writing makes me want to find out more. At every turn of the page, I was getting impatient but worried at the same time at what could possibly go down. This is not my usual read. Even in contemporary fiction, I will avoid it if I can. I figure, I know enough real people facing these struggles that I read about so where’s the escape? But I’ll be the first to say as well, well written is well written, I suppose.

There is a continuation to Charlie and Jesse’s story. This first book does not even end in HFN but somehow I didn’t mind it. If I don’t get a chance to read the 2nd book, I’m fine with it; BUT I’m hoping I do, no doubt. Such is life. Sometimes, certain things have no endings, you don’t get closure yet somehow you find a way to find one. At least that’s how I saw it…

I want to say thank you, Amalie, for this, but it’s probably gonna sound sarcastic even if I don’t want it to. How can it not? What do I say? Thank you for this depressing and melancholic feeling that I’m trying to shake off? Thank you for the bleak outlook that’s pervasive for the most part of the book? Thank you for the optimism however shaky it is? Ahh, I know. Thank you for evoking such an emotion out of me. That doesn’t happen very often. Totally unexpected!

[Carol (StarAngel's Reviews) Allen · Rating 5 out of 5]

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[Gitte TotallyBookedBlog · Rating 4 out of 5]

‘Dreaming of the person I could be was detrimental to my emotional health. There was no end to that rabbit hole. It was dark and scary place.’

We loved the synopsis for Progress by Amalie Silver and couldn’t wait to get stuck in as we guessed it would be one hell of an emotional ride. And it was. We felt hugely morose as we quickly realised that this would pull at those deep rooted emotions as we’re sure many of you too can relate to some if not many of the issues evident in this story.

‘Never let them see you cry, Charlie.’

Bullying – name calling – low self-esteem and life experiences no one should have to live through. It made for hard reading and we have to admit that whilst we love realism and that all important connection to a character – we still like to escape into books to remove ourselves from real life. That is not a negative; rather it’s a positive. It felt too real at times.

‘I wanted to be somebody. I wanted to be somebody to him.’

It took a while for us to fully become engrossed in this story but Charlie and Jesse pulled us in and we felt so incredibly sorry for both. Never has two pov’s been more important as without Jesse’ we would have struggled with his character. Instead, we actually felt overwhelming sadness over his character.

Charlie has been bullied and treated appallingly her whole life. Her size has sparked horrendous taunts and treatment. Meeting Jesse, a co-worker and a complete man whore and arrogant sod changes her life. He becomes her crutch in many respects and the instigator for Charlie’s transformation.

“I frustrate you, right?” I whispered

“And I make you sad,” he said.

“I’m no one,” I retorted.

His eyes glossed over. “And I’m nothing.”

Jesse has had a very traumatic childhood and suffers from manic depression which means he loses grips with reality and himself. He’s painted as a male slapper, a bully and an all-round arsehole. Which he absolutely was in parts of this story. We quickly learnt that between Jesse and Charlie each hide behind a visible definition and stigma, both living within their heads putting up a front. A front determined by experiences as well as mental issues and thought processes.

‘Oh, you’re sad? Take a pill. Oh, you’re mad? Have a hit. Oh, you’re happy? Take another drink. Exist. And when that became too much to handle, numb it. Live. And when that became too much to cope with, numb it. Fight. And when that became too much to bear, numb it. Since when did living our lives become something we had to dull down?’

We were completely invested and rooted for Charlie and Jesse to heal each other and become more than the initial friends who saw an aspect of themselves in the other. However, sadly for us Charlie lost some of our respect and understanding when for us it seemed as if she herself becomes both a bully and martyr rolled into one. Yes, her initial addiction to Jesse spiralled her into an extreme weight loss with a consequential self-esteem boost, however her reason for why just didn’t convince us and her treatment of Jesse who himself was desperately trying to heal with the help of Charlie was devastatingly low. We just felt at a loss and so bloody sad.

‘I’d borrowed his courage and his confidence until I could build up enough inside me to go it alone. Everyone used a crutch when they needed one; mine was just more unconventional than the norm.’

Progress was beautifully and very well written highlighting the power of words and actions in regard to making another person feel inconsequential and worthless. What gives anyone the right to leave such an impression in someone else’s life through shaming them into despair and hiding? Progress was ugly, real and heart-breaking yet in some ways hopeful too. It felt very original and we have to applaud Amalie Silver for writing outside what can sometimes seem as cookie cutter fiction.

‘That’s what progress is all about. We arrive on the other side with the knowledge of how we got there, never forgetting the struggle. There’s always going to be a story behind massive change. That’s how beauty is created. The trick is remembering.’

♥ ♥ ♥



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[Maya · Rating 3 out of 5]

ARC received via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.



Wow, what an emotional story. I think I need a moment to fully comprehend what I just read.



This story is so heartbreaking and messy and beautiful! I'm so glad we got both, Jesse and Charlie's POVs. Jesse would be on my shit list, had it not been for the insight into his thoughts and mind. Gosh, that poor fella. I really felt for him but he still had his bad moments, where his actions or words hurt Charlie pretty bad. Their relationship was toxic and they both had so much to overcome. At first, I couldn't understand what she saw in him and how she could do that to herself but in the end it all made sense.

“I don’t want you to change a damn thing about yourself for me. You have to do it for yourself.
And I could sit here for eternity telling you I’m sorry and I still wouldn’t have enough to express how I feel.
Neither would saying thank you.”

Let me warn you, this is not a happy, light story, where you can expect to get your HEA. No, not at all! This story is a story about self growth, of acknowledging ones problems and above all it's a story about life.

I cannot wait to read the next book and see how their journey continues!

Safety-gang: Not safe for me. Their relationship was so messy, I don't even know what to say about it. He had some feelings for her but still slept around, while she did not. Also, she sees him with his ONS but he never kisses them or does anything sexual infront oh Charlie. She does date OM at some point and breaks Jesse's heart. He waits for her, tho, and stays celibate. Also, he did have one serious relationship that went bad and we get to see the history between OW and him.
Charlie was raped when she was 9 by her parents friend and was also verbaly abused in school. That made her confidence and sex life almost non-existent.
Condoms were used.

[dreamerinexile · Rating 5 out of 5]

Will the little bugs learn to fly 5 fucking gold stars.

*Received an ARC for honest review for Wicked Women Book Blog*

You know those stories that take a hold of you from the get go and even after you’re done reading it; it keeps haunting you. Progress was one of those stories; it was an intricately woven tale that brought forth a gamut of emotions. This new version of Progress basically exploded in my face. Amalie Silver has outdone herself; she has cast a spell on me with her narrative about Charlie and Jesse.

Charlie wasn’t your typical heroine, at least not the ones we read about. Yes she was incredibly sweet; quirky and loving. But she was more than those traits; to me she portrayed all the girls that struggled to survive their teen years. Charlie was each one of us, all rolled into one. She was each of us feeling and believing we were ugly, unloved, and invisible. She was each of us being cruelly made fun of, disregarded and ignored. She was each one of us with hope, aspiration, and love. Charlie was simply put, me or you as we were growing up, with our doubts and our fears. Charlie was every girl who cried herself to sleep at night because she didn’t fit in.

The biggest draw for me about Charlie was the fact that even after all the pain and, she wasn’t broken. I loved her spirit, her courage, her strength. She made me feel hope, she made want to be a better person. I looked up to her, she became my hero.

And then Jesse came into the picture. At first I didn’t understand his caginess or his behavior. He came off as callous and unfeeling. He was the ultimate bad boy, the boy who didn’t get close to anyone, didn’t care how he treated people because he didn’t feel anything. Everything he didn’t feel, every emotion he kept caged inside ignited when he met Charlie. Jesse was a complicated soul; he had lived a hard life. A life that was filled with loss, pain and heartbreak; he was misunderstood, badly treated and found himself always being left behind. Even knowing that he was broken, he was still incredibly swoon-worthy to me. I wanted to wrap my arms around this broken boy and piece him together so that he was no longer so completely lost. Until Charlie came into his life, Jessie didn’t have anyone who would understand him, accept his mood swings, erratic behavior, and strange intensities. She brought out a completely different side of Jesse. A Jesse that cared; felt new sensations and believed that even a broken soul like him could be happy.

As I read along, my heart tried desperately to make a break for it. I found myself falling deeper and deeper into the spell of these two lost yet beautiful souls. I felt each scar, each ache, and each hurt they felt as they trudged along with their afflictions and trials, their inner battles and musings. I silently encouraged them to move forward together. No one deserved a happy ever after like Charlie and Jesse. I wanted them to be happy, to be there for each other, and to be each other’s shelter in a storm. I knew from the bottom of my heart that no one understood Jesse better than Charlie. I was giddy at the thought of them being together, the sheer pleasure of watching them learn new things about each other made my soul sigh. Their fear became my fear, their joy became my joy. I simply loved the story like no other.

As I am writing this review, I am trying desperately to fight back the salty liquid that wants to make a run for it. I am remembering and my heart is heavy and light at the same time. Progress is a story about friendship, love, understanding, compassion and loss. I loved, loved Progress because it spoke about two issues that needs to be addressed by us. We see this in our daily life, be it our children or siblings or friends or families. Progress talks about something that we should not ignore and take a stand against. Because no matter who you are or where you come from, everyone deserves to be loved and accepted.

[Vasiliki · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars

***ARC kindly provided by Book Enthusiast Promotions via NetGalley for the exchange of an honest review***

What an amazing book! What a fantastic story! I'm so touched by this book that I'm worried that my review won't do justice to it!

This is the story of Jesse and Charlie! Two opposites! I won't say anything about the plot as I don't want to give anything away. You should read this book unprepared for what is coming! To feel it in full force! The story is split in three parts. First part is written from Charlie's POV, second part from Jesse's POV and last part from the POV of both them. These parts make the story so much stronger! The writing is amazing! It's direct and honest! Oh, so honest that I didn't stop missing breaths and heartbeats! Ms. Silver has made an amazing job with this story. I admit I fell in love with her writing and her characters. The plot is moving fast and it is well built.

During the first part, we see how and why is Charlie insecure of herself and her internal fight! Charlie is an amazing heroine! She appears to be so positive and strong to everyone and she has hope in life. Most of all, she is honest to herself and to Jesse. Not immediately but after she has the whole picture and it takes real strength to do so.

During the second part, we understand how and why Jesse does what he does or doesn't. Jesse is so broken. It hurts to read his thoughts, his feelings. Everything is so intense about him. I love him too. He is so different and so alike Charlie.

During the third part, everything felt so intense and real. I couldn't believe how everything turned out but I wouldn't change a thing. Everything happened as they should and the end was beautifully painful. I know it sounds crazy what I say but I wouldn't change it either. It made sense to me. And as it was a cliffhanger in a way, I cannot wait to read what happens next!

I definitely recommend this book to everyone who loves to read a painfully honest New Adult.

[Carter Ashby · Rating 5 out of 5]

Here is one of those rare novels that dives deeper than you could imagine into the anatomy of a troubled relationship. The storytelling was slow and cerebral, thoughtful, beautiful.

It's one of those snowflake stories that will be a different experience for each reader. We all bring our own issues to the books we read, and this book, more than most, will strike a nerve. The main question I walked away with was this:

How do you balance your love for someone else with what you owe yourself?

I've never read a more insightful exploration of this topic, and chances are, if you don't already have a strong opinion on this subject, you will by the end of the story. In a lot of ways, Jesse is the "bastard" hero that romance readers find so appealing. But Charlie is as unconventional a heroine as I've ever read, and her evolution is equally unconventional and deeply relatable.

It's perfectly valid to see this book as equally Charlie's and Jesse's story, but for me it was about Charlie. Jesse is the catalyst for Charlie's evolution during which she begins to come out of hiding from her past and heal herself. To her friends, her relationship with Jesse is foolish and destructive. But what they can't see is her capacity for empathy and her burgeoning inner strength. To me, she displayed this strength from the beginning, and it finally comes to its fruition at the end of the story.

I can't wait until more people I know read this so we can talk about it! It's a book to talk about and think about. I also can't wait to continue the journey with Interrupted. After this much personal evolution, Charlie's due for some rewards.

[Susan Owensby · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book totally blew me the he** away! It's dark, emotional and will make you think. Right from the very beginning the author pulls you in with this:

"This is the way the mind works. Memories shift and twist. We forget the details and things in between, but retain the thoughts that impact us most."

Progress is an edgy read that will take you on a journey into the lives of Charlie and Jesse; two utterly broken but beautiful people who are struggling to discover where they fit into this big world. The author gives us much insight into their lives that you will feel as if you are right there in the story yourself.

Jesse is complicated to say the least. He’s tormented & twisted at times, but there is also a sweet--almost innocent--piece of him that will pull at your heartstrings. This character is filled with demons that he battles on a daily basis that can turn him into the ultimate jerk that every girl fears. But, it's complicated.

Charlie sees that there is more to Jesse than what you see on the surface. He wants to be good, happy, and he wants the beautiful girl for his own. He tries everyday to be better but those da** demons are around every corner. And this makes you love the broken boy.

Quote:
"I knew then, that whatever triggered his anger was the same thing that triggered my complacency...a past too painful to remember. It was the only explanation. We'd both seen trauma, and dealt with it differently."

Charlie is the beautiful girl, inside and out; many women will be able to relate to her in some way. She doesn’t have a sense of self worth. This young lady, like a lot of us, is trapped in this world of low self esteem brought on by years of bullying from her peers and other trauma. Charlie is a wonderful and dynamic character that is beautifully layered and 100% relatable. The only thing that I really wanted in the story was MORE of Charlie. I wanted more of her feelings and exactly what she was going through as time went by.

I won’t lie to you, this can be a tough story to read at times. It's almost too real. The emotions and feelings that the author will pull out of you will astound you. By the end of the book, I felt so many emotions running through me that I needed to talk to someone else who had read it. I needed to know more. I begged for more of the story. Even though the book was pretty dark at times there was also hope, love, and admiration for these two characters.

You will be taken on a journey with Progress with all the hills and valleys you would expect, and a few you wouldn't. This is not a light read by any means but it is extremely enlightening and informative. I learned so much from this amazing book that I cannot wait to read more.

[Linathebookaddict · Rating 4 out of 5]

ARC kindly provided in exchange for an honest review.
This book was so different! It enthralled and frustrated me at the same time!!! It's a story of...growning up. A story of a woman wanting to change and a man who becomes the catalyst for that decision.
I liked how unique the writing was. Charlie is a woman battling her weight issue. She is a curvy girl who knows what others think of her. Her self esteem is low and she is shocked when Jesse, a gorgeous man, gives her the time of the day. But Jesse's behavior is erratic and he can easily destroy Charlie's already thin layer of confidence.
The characters go through transformations as the story unfolds. Just sit tight for the wild ride!
If you want something that will make you think and feel, then this is for you.

****4 Stars****

[D · Rating 5 out of 5]

#thisbook It's beyond what words can convey.
From the first chapter until the very end, I was sucked into a vortex of emotions and I kept spinning and spinning until the last words on the page. I wanted the end of the book to introduce itself to me instantly, yet I wanted it to remain a figment of my imagination. Because if we met, I wasn't sure if I would like it or not.
#thisbook reeled me in then let me swim free for a while relishing in the poetic words, the sincerity of the story, only to yank hard on the line reminding me, this was not an easy story, there were hard truths, tough realizations, even harder decisions.
Amalie Silver's words flow so effortlessly giving the reader a raw and organic story of love that maybe shouldn't happen, can't happen, but happens. And while you are watching the whole thing unfold in a string of the most beautiful and soulfully ernest words, it seems to hit you from all sides out of nowhere.
PROGRESS travels deep into your mind and your heart. It takes hold of you, nurturing you yet taking your breath like it's your last. It brings a smile to your face as the tears slide down your cheeks trying to drown your hope for Jess and Charlie. #this book covers you in dark clouds of grief, guilt and shame but radiates the sun in relief, optimism and forgiveness.
This book will be on my forever favourites list. I haven't read a book that touched me so deeply in a long time. An absolutely remarkable read.
D 5+++/5

[Loz · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars

sometimes it's so hard to review a 3 star read. i feel bad about giving a 3 star rating even though i was thoroughly pulled in and loved this roller coaster ride. well okay, no i didn't outright love the book but i enjoyed it and my emotions were all over the place? whatever. even if these characters drove me insane at times i couldn't put this one down. it was addictive with it's quietly angst-y and yes, slightly irritating and flawed characters. i hope the next book is released soon otherwise i'll forget the story and all those the feelings it brought while reading. both good and bad feelings. both characters drove me nuts if i am honest, but in a good way.

it's a page turner, maybe not for everyone though. jesse isn't your average hero, he is temperamental verging on rude and at the start we don't really understand why. sometimes simply put he is an outright asshole to others and the heroine charlie. we find out more to his character and why he is the way he is as the book progresses. our heroine charlie, i liked her for the most part, she was quite a sweet girl. charlie suffers from severe body image issues and terrible anxiety. charlie is overweight and with such low self esteem and self confidence, she looks at herself compared to others as a lesser being and treats herself this way too. it was sad to read at times.

this book touches on mental illness, body image issues and a whole bunch of topics. i don't know where this journey of charlie and jesse will travel next but i hope the wait isn't too long. it's the type of book i would have preferred to wait for part 2 to be released before reading had i of known it ended the way it did. not so much because of cliffhanger frustration but it's just that i'll forget the emotions and attachment i felt to such an angst-y ride and it's a story that would flow better and you would see more progress dare i say, if you were in the moment with these two people.

[Amalie Silver]

Now on NetGalley! https://s2.netgalley.com/catalog/book...
Pre-order for 99 cents! http://amzn.to/1ZiQKov

[Letty (Cover to Cover Book Blog Reviewer) · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’ve struggled so much to come up with the right words to write this review. I’ve come to the conclusion that no matter what I say, I will never find the appropriate ones that will do this story justice. And although this is a bit lengthy (guess I did find some words ;-) ), I hope you will read it until the end.

This is not the typical love story. We don’t have an Alpha who makes women fall at his feet with his domineering ways nor the sweet boy next door who makes women swoon. We don’t have the romance and flowers that make us wish we were living in the story we’re reading. This is a story of two lost souls, searching for the same thing, although they don’t know it and might not even know how to achieve it. They are flawed, broken, and full of insecurities which make them so real and easy to identify with.

Charlie has been living with a fear of rejection and feelings of inadequacy, all her life being the butt of jokes and subjected to bullying due to her size. In private she puts herself down, making it obvious how little she thinks of herself, but she possesses an inner strength that even she’s not aware of and this helps her put up a tough front. Although I don’t like the fact that she felt that way about herself, I think it’s necessary to show her low self-esteem at the beginning of the story so we see how her friendship with Jesse has a positive influence, helping her grow.

Jesse is also carrying a load of emotional stress. He is using his ‘tough guy’ exterior to hide the lonely and dark man hidden behind the façade. His mental illness doesn’t allow him to feel normal and he uses what he can to avoid showing vulnerability. His demons have such a hold on him that he has erected walls to protect himself from the outside.

Charlie and Jesse love each other, differently, but with a need neither has experienced before. She makes him feel alive. He awakens her soul, making her feel worthy. They both help each other in a way no one else has been able to do and at the time when they need it the most. Their bond goes way beyond the physical, making the connection much more profound. They are both clinging to the wonderful way they feel when they are together and that makes them overlook the negative that comes from it.

Because of all their issues, their relationship is not always good for either of them, both saying and doing things that hurt the other, yet it’s impossible to hate them. There were moments when I was so upset with Jesse, with the way he spoke to and treated Charlie, I wanted to smack him and hurt him. Then I remembered what he’s been through and continues to struggle with, and I felt sorry for him. At the same time, I was upset with Charlie, for all the times that she kept coming back to him after the horrible way he treated her, but knowing her capacity for love, it was easy to see there could be no other way for her.

This is not an erotic romance and there isn’t much sex, and although I love my sex scenes as much as the next person, I don't think they're needed in this story; this is about so much more than that. There is so much sexual tension between Charlie and Jesse, giving us that sense of connection between them, that we still get that anxiety for what’s to come.

I laughed, I cried, I cringed, and I had my heart broken so many times throughout this book, I wasn’t sure how I would finish it. But all those emotions just caused me to read that much faster, desperate to know what would happen with Charlie and Jesse. These two characters have gotten to me like no others and I love them so.

This book will make you think, as not everything is black and white. If you are like me, you will find yourself analyzing every line and every action long after you have finished reading, making the reading experience so much more rewarding.

Amalie Silver has given us a magnificent story; one with a touching plotline where real and flawed characters burrow into your soul. It is a heart-wrenching account of self-acceptance, personal growth, and love. For me, this is one of the best stories I’ve ever been fortunate enough to read.

[~My Book Obsession~ · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've wanted to read this book for some time now but it never seemed like the right time to pick it up. I'm glad I waited until I had a full day to read,because,I would have been miserable having to seek time to read.
Progress will not be a book for everyone. It has some triggers even if they are subtle. Progress deals with mental issues in its truest form. It takes you to a place your neighbor or friend maybe living in at this moment. It's two people journey to acceptance, understanding, and solace.
Charlie is a young woman who has been bullied, dehumanize, and ridicule most , if not, all of her life. She doesn't see her self as a person who should want more with her lot in life. However, she meets a boy named Jesse that speaks without thinking, hurts without remorse and gives her the will to change her mind, body, and soul. She takes little steps to bettering herself but fails to see she is in need of help (professional) to heal both inside and out.
Many people will see Charlie as a victim in this story. However, I see her as equal parts victim and user. She uses Jesse as much as he uses her. She uses him to give herself a reason to lose weight, as a person to let the inner workings of her mind escape to. She bullies him by knowing he has a mental illness but is only there when she feels the need, never sees if he on medication, never ask him how does he deal with it. She can ask many question about his past, when she can see he is at his lowest and doesn't need to relive, but never about his mental state.
Now Jesse is piece of work too. However, he doesn't hide behind it and tries not to let it get him down. But it's a daily struggle. His mouth and brain filter doesn't work and if anyone knows a person with ADHD you know it's not because they don't care (all the time) or try, it is truly hard for them.
A lot of what he says to Charlie is mean and disheartening but some of it is true. She needed to hear those things so she could make a change for the better. He could've used better tact but some times blunt is best.
He uses her by letting her take on some of his issues. By having her stay with him when his mind won't shut off. Bailing him out and buying him things.

Both of these characters make progress in their mental health it's not a lot but every little step gets them closer to where they need to be. I feel like this book is a realistic view into the world of mental health. It may help someone understand what's it like to live with mental health issues.
I highly recommend this book!

[S. Chavous · Rating 5 out of 5]

As I sit here after just finishing this story, I'm a jumble of emotions. I feel a sense of pride at seeing Charlie, a girl who had been beaten down by the world for so long, a girl I could relate to in so many ways, find the strength to finally put herself first. And yet my heart aches for her and the beautiful broken boy who helped her find herself while he remained lost.

This story deals with some tough subject matter and isn't a journey through a field of flowers and rainbows, but it does what any good story should do, it makes you feel, so much, and so deeply.

The writing is beautiful, the message is an important one. You want to read this.

[Uniquely Jenn Life & Books · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 Star - ARC received in exchange for a fair and honest review


2 years ago I read a little book called Progress, so captivated was I that I quickly went into book 2, Interrupted and then the final book, Rewired. At the end of my journey I fucking bawled. I mean a complete and utter ugly cry to end ugly cries. I had my mom, whom I was visiting at the time, in a fit of concern because I could not talk and I had just burst into tears out in the living room next to her. My journey was complete and I had been punched in the gut. Seriously, I don't normally ugly cry. Only a few books do that too me. It is still a top read of mine, one that I always wished more people would have read.

Well, the author decided that it needed reworking. It was her first baby and she realized she could do the story some justice with the seasoning the past few years of writing had given her. I felt honored to get a first look at what such a reworking had done.

The story is the same but boy is it different! This is a stronger telling of Charlie and Jesse's story and allows the reader to became even more greatly attached to the characters and dive in and get to know them. This has definitely brought the story to another level.

So that is my back story to what I can say about the retelling, let me know tell you just about the story and why I think you should read it.

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Progress isn't a romance, this isn't your fantasy world to escape into. This is a look at the reality of relationships and how it isn't clean, or tied up with a bow, nor will you find just a few dramatic missteps and then the hero makes a grand gesture and the girl swoons, we swoon, and the world rejoices, hot sweaty sex and lets get married.

No, this isn't romance. This is a look at how people are in the real world. We are a jumble of insecurities, neurotic tendencies, and shattered minds. We are broken, we are messy and we don't get to have perfect encounters with men we hate but damn they say the sexiest thing so we are putty in their hands. Nope, sorry you won't find that here.

Charlie isn't a size 4 heroine but a voluptuous woman with a beautiful heart and soul who has faced a dark ugly world and come out somehow still filled with optimism for the good in people. She doesn't see the value in herself after years of battling the the put downs and looks of harsh unfeeling people. When she meets Jesse she is drawn to him and he doesn't treat her quite like everyone else has.

Jesse, however, isn't easy to be around. He is volatile, rude, nice one moment and then scathing the next. Charlie doesn't know what it is she says or does that sets him off and the truth is it isn't her. This is the gritty reality of being in a relationship with someone who's mind is more their enemy.



For all the grit that is thrown our way by Jesse, the glimpses into his head that we are given help to make us sympathetic for him and not only his daily battles against his own mind but the battle of the demons from his past. Still, for myself I can't help but beg, scream, and shout at Charlie to find the value in herself and run far away from Jesse. But she is too good, better than I. She sees the good in Jesse, she is the good,and she wants for him happiness almost more than she wants it for herself.

This is their story, their reality, their world colliding.

All I can say is buckle in and enjoy the ride. The journey gives you the appreciation for the finish line.

This review and more at: BackOffMyBooks.com

[Nicola · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 stars.

Amalie Silver brings readers a story which contains some difficult, sensitive issues; mental illness, dysfunctional and abusive relationships, and body-shaming. Charlie and Jesse are both fighting battles. Individually it's hard enough, but together it brings added difficulties and if I'm honest, I'm not quite sure how I feel having read Progress.

"Dreaming of the person I could be was detrimental to my emotional health."

I didn't dislike it, the story held itself together, flowed and kept me captivated. But I found certain elements problematic and handled a little insensitively. Maybe this will be answered in the next book, but I struggled with Jesse's abusive nature being justified as part of being bipolar and accepted; being bipolar doesn't mean an automatic shift into cruelty and physical abuse. Charlie's weight loss also didn't sit well with me. Her method resonated, but when I followed a similar diet, albeit it for very different reasons and for weeks rather than months, I did not look well, I was not well and people noticed, yet here no one particularly batted an eyelid.



But despite this, Progress oddly grabbed hold of me and I there's no question of whether I want to read the next instalment. I do; I want to see where this story goes because as it stands neither are psychologically mature enough to handle the realities of a relationship. I'm not even convinced that they could make a relationship work or whether I actually like them.

Copy received via NetGalley for an honest and unbiased opinion.

[Sheryl · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky enough receive an ARC of Progress. With this emotional story of Charlie and Jesse, I have no idea where to begin or if I can even find the right words to convey how good this story is. For me Charlie was a very relatable character. Charlie and Jesse both have their own horrible pasts that define them. Both of them need to find the strength within themselves to make the changes that are necessary to overcome the trials in their lives. Sometimes change isn’t easy to achieve but must be done. This story is wonderfully told and is a must read!

[ZARIA (Sheldon Cooper lover) · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book was torture! I was waiting for the main character to grow a backbone and stand up to so much abuse, but she never did. Very frustrating read.... he has mental issues and since she was obsessed with him, she put up with all his junk. There was so much repetition. Everything that happened was so obviously unrealistic. I kept reading hoping it would get better but sadly it didn't. I can't bring myself to buy the next book to find out what happens because I really don't care.

[Deb M · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amalie Silver’s Progress is both beautiful and hauntingly tragic. This unforgettable story held me in its grasp from beginning to end, and it absolutely slayed me. Ms. Silver is not only a phenomenal storyteller, she has a stellar understanding of the complexities of human behavior. She has opened a box of puzzle pieces and challenged us to assemble a picture. The brilliance of this is that every reader will invariably create their own image of what this book means to them. And, that image will not be wrong. Because this story is an exploration into the personality traits we inherit, and those we form on our own. It is a story of how outside influences not only shape how we see ourselves, but also have the power to break us if we allow them to. Progress is a unique kind of love story between two complicated and damaged souls who have the choice to either succumb to the perceptions they have of themselves or break free. I promise you will be thinking about this book for weeks!

Ever since she can remember, Charlene “Charlie” Johnson has been fat. Not plus size, not big boned, not chubby. No, Charlie is admittedly obese. She’s certainly been reminded of it every single day of her 22 years. The taunts, the cruel names, the horrible tricks that were a routine part of her life since grade school ultimately led her to believe she is ugly, damaged, incompetent, and unloveable.

I didn’t care how strong I was supposed to be, no one could’ve endured that daily torture. As a result, I remained quiet, and became a sponge for everyone else’s woes. I stayed home as much as I could. The agony of knowing that every whisper I saw when I walked into a room, every snicker I heard from a distance, and every sinister word that flew from someone’s mouth were all for me, left me believing that I was hideous.

Charlie may consider herself a sponge for everyone else’s woes; the non-threatening fat girl who’s easy to talk to and always ready to offer advice. But therein lies her beauty. Or her curse, as the case may be, because she finds it hard to give up on people. Charlie’s ability to empathize with others is extraordinary. She’s like a beacon, calling troubled souls to her lighthouse of wisdom and safety. It is a safe place for her as well. She can hide behind it and still feel needed, desired, valued. She is happy enough with her life, accepting this is who she is and always will be. Until Jesse Anders sees the beacon that is Charlie and walks into her world.

There was nothing in my past to which I could compare the feeling. He stole the air from my lungs, the thoughts from my mind, and made me want to squeal like a little girl at her first pop concert. It was completely disconcerting.
There was only one other way to explain it: Smitten. I was in Deep. Fucking. Smit.

The gravitational pull Jesse and Charlie have toward each other defies logic. Her co-workers at the restaurant warn her Jesse is bad news. He is intense, unpredictable, volatile. Even frightening. But for the first time in her life a man sees beyond her weight problem to the beautiful woman she is on the inside. Charlie can’t stay away, nor does she want to. Jesse is quickly becoming her best friend, and yet he is still an enigma she can’t quite figure out.

We were completely opposite, but drawn together despite ourselves. His sad, gray eyes were too powerful to ignore. They reminded me so much of my own. I knew then that whatever triggered his anger was the same thing that triggered my complacency…a past too painful to remember.

Charlie is an amazing person. She is a survivor. She’s made the best of her life such as it is. When Jesse walks in upending everything she’s held onto for years, she grabs the experience with both hands, and finally tosses away her complacency. The rare glimpses of himself Jesse reveals to her, the person she knows he has the potential to be, break her heart. Discovering the truth about his past, and his severe bi-polar disorder opens up a world of understanding for Charlie. It doesn’t excuse his hurtful words and neglect. Despite their volatile friendship, Charlie makes positive changes in her life due to Jesse’s influence. She makes progress. Unfortunately that involves making a decision that might destroy her heart.

Jesse’s past is indeed tragic and crushingly painful. His present is not much better. His erratic behavior runs the gamut from playful and joking to mean and cruel. He’s attentive one day, then gone without a word for a week. Jesse’s mind may be held hostage by his illness but he’s beyond intelligent. He’s cognizant of his oncoming bi-polar episodes, the ugly stages they drag him through, and does his best to keep that ugliness away from Charlie.

People used to talk about it. They used to say when you meet her, you’ll know. And I’d laugh and laugh and laugh. But nothing about my life had been the same since I’d met her. She challenged everything I knew about my faith in mankind. And my reasoning for losing faith had been logical and justified; I hadn’t just made that shit up. People sucked. But not her. She couldn’t hurt me if she tried.

Jesse wants so badly to be a decent guy for Charlie but his illness virtually takes over his life. At least that’s his excuse, and he’s sticking to it. Making the effort to stay on his meds and avoid triggers that hurl him into the manic depressive spiral is a lot of work. What if he puts in his all and still fails? And this is where Jesse is stuck. He hasn’t allowed himself to truly believe and embrace his feelings for Charlie yet.

Progress is gorgeously written from both Charlie and Jesse’s point of view. Ms. Silver puts us inside their heads and has us seeing through their eyes. Because of this, I loved both characters. This is a heart wrenching, emotionally draining novel. And I loved absolutely every minute of it. Although it ends in a cliffhanger of sorts, I would be perfectly happy with the ending as it is. That’s not to say I’m not biting my nails waiting to find out what happens next in book 2, Progress: Interrupted.

[Ann Marie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was gifted this book and I am so happy that I was able to read this amazing story.

This was an amazingly beautiful twisted story of two souls colliding, seeking and wanting love, to be loved for who they are or even who they could be. Sexual tension, desire and love all wrapped up in a perfect emotional roller coaster.

Meet Charlie, she is not in a healthy place at this point in her life, whether it’s her weight, mental and/or emotional state. She struggles with many issues, weight seems to be her biggest in the beginning. For most women we think it's the weight, but it goes much deeper and we know it. As a child growing up Charlie never had it easy, she was the girl that was always on the outside looking in. Boys tormented her, she is like so many of us who have struggled in our childhood so many similarities it’s scary. Sadly I believe our struggles follow us into adulthood. The “fitting In”, the want to be desired, to be loved, to be thin...or hell “curvey”, to be BEAUTIFUL. All of it follows us, but you can turn and face it (not saying it’s easy, hell I haven’t faced things). It’s all up to you and when/if you do face it, will it be with kindness? or Bitterness? Or would you just seek revenge?

We also get to meet Jesse, who is a very tortured soul, he is living with bipolar a life changing disorder. I want to insert my usual, “OMG” “hot” “sexy” etc...but ya know what? NO. He deserves more here. He deserves a lot more. How crazy is it that we voice our opinions of how women shouldn’t be objectified, but not when it comes to men? I feel, maybe he was a victim of this. He is sexy, he is a man who walks in a room and everyone notices him. Do we ever think about what is beyond that exterior, beyond the sexy eyes, the hair, the looks? No we don’t, who does? And yet when men do it to women we get upset. (SMH here) Jesse, he is a person with problems, issues that not everyone has or have dealt with. I feel so deeply for him, it leaves me sad. I am hurting for him. I think we all assume too much, that’s where I am in my head right this minute. If ever I wanted to hug a character from a book, it’s right now at this very minute. Although he probably would tell me to f*ck off, lol, I would still want to though. I see beyond the surface with Jesse and I still adore him. He is perfectly imperfect, and yes I adore him even more. Sometimes, all we need is understanding and unconditional love.

I rarely feel compelled like this, like I want to shout out “Hey, just wait a minute” …...Charlie has every right to her feelings, sadly Jesse can’t voice his true feelings. “Love isn’t just about what you take. It’s also about what you can give.” Sadly Jesse doesn’t seem to know the “how”. I pray that in the next book, he learns…..he deserves love, even when he doesn’t.

Charlie, on her journey of discovery finds that just maybe giving what you get/got may not make you feel any better. Right? We shall see. I am looking forward to the next book, hoping and praying that Jesse and Charlie find the right path that is good for them, be it together or separately. Everyone deserves love, respect and understanding. Thank you for this amazing story that is not only full of emotions but also thought provoking.