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Telling Each Other the Truth
Proven, Healing Ways to Speak the Truth in Love
Now in a fresh package, this classic on learning the art of true communication is good news for all. The author uses Scripture, case histories, and dialogue to impart timeless principles that can heal damaged relationships, strengthen everyday communication, and help people avoid the traps of manipulation that often disrupt the free flow of honest discussion. Readers will find this information invaluable in every relationship of life--especially those that don't come easy.
Now in a fresh package, this classic on learning the art of true communication is good news for all. The author uses Scripture, case histories, and dialogue to impart timeless principles that can heal damaged relationships, strengthen everyday communication, and help people avoid the traps of manipulation that often disrupt the free flow of honest discussion. Readers will find this information invaluable in every relationship of life--especially those that don't come easy.
190 pages, Paperback
First published July 31, 1985
33 people are currently reading
158 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
March 29, 2023
A useful guide to relating to others in truth and love. It's common to give hints and expect others to read your mind, but that can just create frustration and resentment in both parties. This book teaches you how to be straightforward and honest and why that is the best practice. You cannot change others but you can change yourself in how you speak and react.
"God has never promised a universe where the behavior of other people will be sinless towards you. When you stop being shocked at the sinful behavior of other people, you will find your angry outrage replaced by patient long-suffering." (Backus, p. 190)
"God has never promised a universe where the behavior of other people will be sinless towards you. When you stop being shocked at the sinful behavior of other people, you will find your angry outrage replaced by patient long-suffering." (Backus, p. 190)
July 12, 2020
I don't often give 5 stars but this book is one of the best practical communication books I've ever read! This book uncovers poor communication habits and teaches why the things we've been taught by well meaning people in our lives is not ok and in fact damaging to a true and honest relationship! The author uses scriptural examples to help us realize and overcome habits ingrained on our hearts in an easy to understand format. I am a different and better person from reading and applying these practical and loving teachings!
September 23, 2021
I don't know how this got on my list as being read. I read the book many years ago and wanted a copy but did not want it taking up physical space, so I ordered the Kindle edition. Backus' book is invaluable for learning how to communicate with others and control your emotions while doing it. His perspective helped me realize that I could act without being reactive.
February 5, 2018
Fascinating
This book was beyond amazing and I believe everyone should take in what it has to say. Most every concept brought a new conviction which is great if your trying to let Christ mold you to look more like Him.
This book was beyond amazing and I believe everyone should take in what it has to say. Most every concept brought a new conviction which is great if your trying to let Christ mold you to look more like Him.
June 23, 2020
Great advice for communication. I believe reading this book and putting it to practice can solve several issues when it comes to relationships with significant others as well as family and co-workers. There are some pretty great stories too.
October 19, 2018
This is a great book to help you understand others, how others see you, and yourself.
August 3, 2016
When a better way to do things is quite foreign to you, it is difficult to incorporate or even understand it. Backus hold our hand through the process by giving us a bit-by-bit guide on how to tell others what we are actually thinking (without the little "white lies" that we are "supposed to" tell in order to "keep the peace") while still being loving about it.
How do you tell someone you just don't want to go to the movies with them tonight? Usually, we invent excuses so that we don't hurt someone's feelings.
How do you say "no" when all you've ever done is say "yes" to people?
Are we responsible for how others react to our words? How can we find a way that is both loving AND truthful?
Backus gives real-life scenarios in the realms of friends, love, work, family, and neighbors. As an added bonus, at the end he discusses 'small talk'--and gives pointers for how and why to get good at it!
This book is helping me get free from the "say something nice or you are a mean person" way of communicating and bringing me more into the "the truth (told in love) will set you free".
And it certainly has brought me more freedom the more I use it. Imagine! Being able to tell someone what you think, while still being loving about it. Your actions no longer being dictated by how someone else might respond.
It takes a lot of courage and love, but the reward is amazing. My relationships are becoming more "real". My relationship with my brother (who also practices telling the truth in love) is deepening beyond what I thought possible. And as I tentatively step out and begin to try it with others (it is quite scary and sometimes people get mad), I find the fruit of such loving truth-telling to be immense.
How do you tell someone you just don't want to go to the movies with them tonight? Usually, we invent excuses so that we don't hurt someone's feelings.
How do you say "no" when all you've ever done is say "yes" to people?
Are we responsible for how others react to our words? How can we find a way that is both loving AND truthful?
Backus gives real-life scenarios in the realms of friends, love, work, family, and neighbors. As an added bonus, at the end he discusses 'small talk'--and gives pointers for how and why to get good at it!
This book is helping me get free from the "say something nice or you are a mean person" way of communicating and bringing me more into the "the truth (told in love) will set you free".
And it certainly has brought me more freedom the more I use it. Imagine! Being able to tell someone what you think, while still being loving about it. Your actions no longer being dictated by how someone else might respond.
It takes a lot of courage and love, but the reward is amazing. My relationships are becoming more "real". My relationship with my brother (who also practices telling the truth in love) is deepening beyond what I thought possible. And as I tentatively step out and begin to try it with others (it is quite scary and sometimes people get mad), I find the fruit of such loving truth-telling to be immense.
May 25, 2007
Great book on communication.
July 31, 2010
Well worth the effort expended in reading. Learn to be respectfully and confidently assertive instead retreating into the pain of unresolved issues or passive agression.
June 23, 2011
Parker loaned this to me. It had some good points but I didn't buy the advice as necessarily "scriptural".
March 27, 2013
Much food for thought on genuine communication with others to build better relationships.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews