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Scrisori către Filip
Sfaturi unui tânăr căsătorit
174 pages
First published January 1, 1920
18 people are currently reading
283 people want to read
About the author
Charlie W. Shedd
47 books18 followersDr. Charles W. Shedd was an American Presbyterian minister and a master communicator of homespun wisdom. Dr. Shedd served as a Presbyterian minister for over 50 years. He was the shepherd of small country churches and big city cathedrals. Along the way, he walked alongside janitors, farmers, physicians, senators, and presidential cabinet members. "Pastor Shedd" never met a stranger, or left anyone who did not feel richer for being in this presence.
He authored over 40 books, wrote nationally syndicated columns, and was a favorite guest of numerous television and radio personalities.
He authored over 40 books, wrote nationally syndicated columns, and was a favorite guest of numerous television and radio personalities.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
May 18, 2012
Miguel and I give this humble little book credit for turning our marriage in to a much needed better direction. I first stumbled upon letters to Philip in an old box of books someone was throughing out. I was just about to throw it back since it was a book for husbands. And miguel is not much of a book guy. I just couldn't put in back I had a one of those moments where you feel a tugg on the heart. So I took it home and started reading it, i was hooked and Miguel noticed. I think it was because I would laugh or mummble while reading it. He would say what's so funny or what's so interesting? I honestly wasn't trying to make him feel left out. I did figure if I had his attenton I wouldn't spoil it for him, so I would just look up briefly say " why don't you find out for yourself" so he picked it up and he felt the same way about the book. It gave us something to talk about which we had not had in so long. Oh here I am going on and on. Any way this is a great book and very fun to read.
August 18, 2011
My then-future father-in-law gave me this to read about a week before my wedding. The book's subtitle is "on how to treat a woman." A rule that has served me well is to always read books which one's future father in law gives one pertaining to how one ought treat his daughter. Just a helpful hint. Anyway, some people might consider this backwards or sexist (there is a lot in here about the role of the man in 'dealing with her moods' and the like) but I thought it was excellent and have no doubt that it has served me well and will continue to do so.
March 16, 2008
Helpful. Insightful. Encouraging. Challenging. Directive. Humorous. Speaking from experience. Practical. Short.
March 11, 2013
Wish I had this book years ago. Would've helped to save my last marriage. My son will read this book and learn much needed lessons.
January 13, 2016
Marriage and life lessons every father should give to their sons. Wow, this is one of the best books ever read! Each chapter is a letter with lots of lessons on how to be a good husband and how to build and maintain a great relationship. I think this book is the best gift for each man who plans to get married. Each letter will definitely make a difference in your life. I have taken a lot of notes on which I have to improve and then came back revisit this book more often. Just don't think twice to pick it up. It's a must read!!!
March 26, 2015
I've read this book several times. Each letter is short and to the point which makes this book an easy read. The author covers subjects that every man should know about. Some men (and women) might think this book is old-fashioned and sexist. As a woman, I often had to chuckle to myself because the author was right on. One can easily tweak the information to bring it up to date, but I would say that most of the information is very applicable.
January 24, 2016
Letters to Philip is the collection of letters written by a father to his son before his marriage. I'm sure most future wives who read this would agree that they would want their husbands to learn from it. I say this, because I would like it too if my husband would read this.
November 16, 2007
My father thoughtfully gave me this to read when it was 'that time' in my life.
July 19, 2016
So glad my dad recommended this book to me.
June 15, 2013
This book, a loaner from a respected co-worker, turned out to be useful and fun to read...despite their warnings about how dated some of the opinions and mind-sets may be. That warning was true and useful; however, the general utility of the book overshadows the 1950s He-Man and She-Woman mindset. Any close reader should be able to get past that and to the meat, which is life lessons from a preacher-dad to his newlywed son about how to be a good husband. If the goal is to provide good, basic reminders and insights to a newlywed husband, then this book succeeds. Worth a read...presuming you are a newlywed husband...
March 28, 2019
I read this book along with the companion book, Letters to Karen, years ago as part of a Marriage & Family class in college. Letters to Philip is a collection of letters from a father to his son giving practical advice for his marriage. The book is very practical and easy to read. It offers great advice that even though written years ago are still applicable in modern day marriages. Great little book that most people today have likely never heard of.
September 9, 2009
So yes, it does read as though it were written several decades ago, and yes, the author is a bit constricted by the gender roles of his time period, but in this little book Charlie Shedd gives sound marital advice to his son. The chapters are short--they're just brief letters, actually--so it's great for the back of the toilet :)
October 15, 2019
I have to read this book several times, after every crisis in marriage. An excelent text about how a man should behave with his wife. A text to remember every time how lucky you are and what treasure God give to you to reunite the only one soul.
November 7, 2019
This 128-page book—first published in 1968—is truly an oldie-but-goodie. Tons of wisdom and insight on building a great marriage. Unfortunately, many of the points are dated and quaint. I doubt many people under 50 would find it useful. Full review here: http://bit.ly/2NoTX8k
April 9, 2022
Out dated for now, boys would do well to respect the norms of the past.
October 10, 2020
Wish every male would read this and study/apply to all relationships. Divorce rate/domestic abuse stats might go down....
March 1, 2021
It needs 6 stars
September 24, 2025
Beautifully written, easy to read and understand, a relationship education book that explains many problematic situations that come across a marriage and the way a man should relate to a woman.
Favourite quotes:
" The image of a leader is not that of a mighty potentate sitting on his throne, ruling his cowering subjects with an iron hand. This is more like a conductor standing on his box directing a symphony. Delicate but definite, subdued, yet powerful". chp 1
"There isn't one thing in the world I wouldn't do for him. Because that's how God made women. They'll do anything in the world for you if you put them at ease about their faults; build up their strong points and reach that high level of kindness which seems to say << The blend is what I like. I love you for what you are in total>> this is what is called acceptance and you'll find it in every solid marriage. You better educate yourself in the art of being kind.
I used the word educate because most of us are usually self-centred. Doesn't matter where this comes from, as much as facing it".
chp 2
This is a great word- companionship. It takes an added significance as the years pass. Sexual desires might fade and the need for excitement diminish. Money worries may subside and so could your other anxieties. But there is one thing that you must be sure is continually on the increase. This is the gradual opening of two hearts to welcome each other at the core of their beings. The surfacing of the real you is the secret to long life, inner health and total communion.
She still hopes that you will keep on pursuing her even after you have won her.The man may think that when he says -I do- he has accomplished the mission. His wife, being much wiser about these things, senses that true love has no maximum. For those who keep opening new roads into each other's hearts each day and very often, new possibilities are forever opening up and the love goes on to new greatness.
There are more ways to enter the house that you can imagine. If the children head for the bedroom and mama starts stiffen, you know what ut means. But if the little ones go for the door and Mrs. begins to glow, then this says a lot more. What it says is that here is a man who is a good company. This man is wanted. To be wanted at home is a high aim for all of us men.
She was pure joy and she could only create unhappiness by being absent.
So, I listened, because I enjoyed it, but also because I knew that he knew what he was talking about.
Things are to use. People are to love.Make sure it's not vice versa with you.
Never point in derision to something she can't change.
Never criticize in public. This trotting out each other's weaknesses beyond your own door is always in poor taste. It is acutely embarrassing to innocent bystanders; it indicates that you have not been surfacing your rancor in an intelligent way at home and the only thing it can possibly produce between you is the desire to get even.
Neither by day or by night will I ever cut you down in company. Not before my family, your family, or our family. Not before friends, acquaintances, strangers, when you are with me, or behind your back.
She'll love you more if she knows that some of your nice gestures have been well thought out with her convenience in mind. Living with this absent minded type must be exasperating.
Sometimes a woman likes to believe her man is concentrating exclusively on her, that he has nothing else in mind but her, that she is interesting enough to absorb him completely.
The best climate for healthy growth is one in which we can express the entire range of our feelings. It should be an aim of your marriage to develop your relationship until you can each say what you feel like saying,do what you feel like doing and be what you feel like being.
I think one of the best things is to have sort of a blow-off session with myself on the way home, kind of a de-pressure thing. My wife seems to match her mood to mine. If I come home happy, she's happy. If I'm owly, she's owly.
Favourite quotes:
" The image of a leader is not that of a mighty potentate sitting on his throne, ruling his cowering subjects with an iron hand. This is more like a conductor standing on his box directing a symphony. Delicate but definite, subdued, yet powerful". chp 1
"There isn't one thing in the world I wouldn't do for him. Because that's how God made women. They'll do anything in the world for you if you put them at ease about their faults; build up their strong points and reach that high level of kindness which seems to say << The blend is what I like. I love you for what you are in total>> this is what is called acceptance and you'll find it in every solid marriage. You better educate yourself in the art of being kind.
I used the word educate because most of us are usually self-centred. Doesn't matter where this comes from, as much as facing it".
chp 2
This is a great word- companionship. It takes an added significance as the years pass. Sexual desires might fade and the need for excitement diminish. Money worries may subside and so could your other anxieties. But there is one thing that you must be sure is continually on the increase. This is the gradual opening of two hearts to welcome each other at the core of their beings. The surfacing of the real you is the secret to long life, inner health and total communion.
She still hopes that you will keep on pursuing her even after you have won her.The man may think that when he says -I do- he has accomplished the mission. His wife, being much wiser about these things, senses that true love has no maximum. For those who keep opening new roads into each other's hearts each day and very often, new possibilities are forever opening up and the love goes on to new greatness.
There are more ways to enter the house that you can imagine. If the children head for the bedroom and mama starts stiffen, you know what ut means. But if the little ones go for the door and Mrs. begins to glow, then this says a lot more. What it says is that here is a man who is a good company. This man is wanted. To be wanted at home is a high aim for all of us men.
She was pure joy and she could only create unhappiness by being absent.
So, I listened, because I enjoyed it, but also because I knew that he knew what he was talking about.
Things are to use. People are to love.Make sure it's not vice versa with you.
Never point in derision to something she can't change.
Never criticize in public. This trotting out each other's weaknesses beyond your own door is always in poor taste. It is acutely embarrassing to innocent bystanders; it indicates that you have not been surfacing your rancor in an intelligent way at home and the only thing it can possibly produce between you is the desire to get even.
Neither by day or by night will I ever cut you down in company. Not before my family, your family, or our family. Not before friends, acquaintances, strangers, when you are with me, or behind your back.
She'll love you more if she knows that some of your nice gestures have been well thought out with her convenience in mind. Living with this absent minded type must be exasperating.
Sometimes a woman likes to believe her man is concentrating exclusively on her, that he has nothing else in mind but her, that she is interesting enough to absorb him completely.
The best climate for healthy growth is one in which we can express the entire range of our feelings. It should be an aim of your marriage to develop your relationship until you can each say what you feel like saying,do what you feel like doing and be what you feel like being.
I think one of the best things is to have sort of a blow-off session with myself on the way home, kind of a de-pressure thing. My wife seems to match her mood to mine. If I come home happy, she's happy. If I'm owly, she's owly.
August 29, 2023
Letters To Philip is a book-form of a 29 letters, that the author wrote to his newly married son, to advise him on how to have a happy marriage. It is, therefore intended as a book for new husbands.
I had first read this book at two different times in the early 1990s.
As I still very happily married, I was glad to read-this again now.
While the book was written in 1968 (and is therefore a little bit dated), it is a good set of advice for new husbands in cis-cis marriages (a term the author in 1968 certainly would not have known).
I re-read this book for a third time from August 27 - 29, 2023, a total of 3 days.
Total read time was 228 Minutes = 3 Hrs 48 Minutes.
The author was a Christian counseller; and still, the book is not really over-heavy in any religiosity.
I think most readers can find good nuggets from this small book. I likewise think that re-reading this makes for a good refresher too.
Letters To Philip
is a 3-Star book.
I had first read this book at two different times in the early 1990s.
As I still very happily married, I was glad to read-this again now.
While the book was written in 1968 (and is therefore a little bit dated), it is a good set of advice for new husbands in cis-cis marriages (a term the author in 1968 certainly would not have known).
I re-read this book for a third time from August 27 - 29, 2023, a total of 3 days.
Total read time was 228 Minutes = 3 Hrs 48 Minutes.
The author was a Christian counseller; and still, the book is not really over-heavy in any religiosity.
I think most readers can find good nuggets from this small book. I likewise think that re-reading this makes for a good refresher too.
Letters To Philip
is a 3-Star book.
September 28, 2020
M-a impresionat naturalețea exprimării și calitatea sfaturilor transmise. Toate sunt lucruri firești pe care tindem să le facem fără efort, dar care de multe ori sunt acoperite de orgoliu și gândire întortocheată. Ceea ce ne învață autorul este să să fim sinceri cu persoana iubită, să avem empatie, sa ne revarsăm dragostea către ea ori de câte ori avem ocazia, să comunicăm problemele, să ne rugăm unul pentru altul, să avem răbdare. O carte pe care aș tine-o aproape și la care aș reveni în viitor pentru a îmi aminti cât de ușor e să fii un iubit/soț bun.
January 20, 2022
I was pleasantly surprised to read quick-moving pieces of advice, and some hilariously outdated idioms: "I've just about shot my wad" and "he ate me out in the blind" being the standouts. The gendering of the advice is mostly unnecessary, and the sex and infidelity chapters have the highest concentration of generalizations and talking around the point. Dr. Shedd's warmth for his son is clearly evident, and his style does little to obfuscate his observations and suggestions, which are largely things-one-should-already-know-seen-from-another-perspective.
April 10, 2018
this is a great book. i read this so long ago, and ever since i started relationship counseling this year i decided to have a re-read. ive learned so much again. points i had forgotten, different points i had not realized before, points i remembered but now i can look at differently since im older. i believe this is probably a book to last generations and still be awesome. a definite must. going to try and get my hands on letters to Karen as well since that was the original
March 19, 2024
I know traditional masculinity gets a really bad reputation, but if I’m being completely honest, the type of husband that this book describes is the type of husband I think most girls want, deep down. Some of the advice uses rather dated language, but the core principles and concepts could definitely be used to prevent a lot of marital issues you see in the modern day.
August 21, 2018
Este es un libro excelente para entender la mejor manera de relacionarnos con nuestra esposa. A pesar de ello, por ser ya viejo el libro, hay elementos a analizar pues el contexto cambia.
A pesar de ello, es un buen libro.
A pesar de ello, es un buen libro.
July 3, 2019
Almost as good as Letters to Karen. And that's saying a lot.
Want to read
November 24, 2020Recommended by an older version of Honey for a Child's Heart book..krb 11/24/20
November 28, 2024
A lot of valuable information
Read
December 25, 2024Book is outdated now. written in the 80s, but still had some wisdom in there. Probably the last read of ‘24. merry Christmas !🎄
July 6, 2019
This book was written by a father to his son before his marriage. Though written in the 60s, the book still has practical wisdom and advice.
December 8, 2023
Read Frequency: Not Again
Keep on shelf as loaner book
Keep on shelf as loaner book
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews