I Hope My Mother Doesn't Read This: A Collection of Humorous Essays

by Greg Scarnici

In his debut collection of candid, shocking and just plain hilarious essays, comedic artist and musician, Greg Scarnici recounts the period in his life when he was just starting to understand his sexuality and the city of New York that he calls home. From getting high with the ‘midget’ from Twin Peaks to giving a trucker a lap dance to the tune of Pebbles’ “Mercedes Boy,” I HOPE MY MOTHER DOESN’T READ THIS offers a snapshot of an artist coming to grips with his comedic artistry at a time when gay comedians were not as accepted as they are today. There are tales of sordid hook-ups, riotous soirees, narcotic mishaps, and an unforgettable encounter with Gina Gershon at a Saturday Night Live after-party, where Greg currently works as an Associate Producer.No emotional stone is left unturned as Scarnici gives readers an uncensored and uproariously funny look into every step of becoming, as legendary nightlife columnist Michael Musto calls “One of the funniest people in NYC – as well as one of its biggest freaks.”

Genres: Audiobook, LGBT, Biography

144 pages, Kindle Edition

First published September 1, 2015

About the author

Greg Scarnici is a comedic writer, director, producer, actor, DJ and musician whose videos have been viewed over 10 million times on YouTube and a host of other sites. His work has also been featured on MTV, VH1, Fox News and CNN.

He currently works as an Associate Producer at "Saturday Night Live" as well as in various other capacities in theater, film and nightlife. He is also a contributing writer for The Huffington Post.

Books include his debut collection of humorous essays: "I Hope My Mother Doesn't Read This," "SEX IN DRAG": a parody of Madonna's infamous SEX book, and his latest essay collection about Fire Island, "Dungeons & Drag Queens."

Reviews

[Amber Sema · Rating 1 out of 5]

Tasteless jokes in which women, people with mental disorders and disabilities, houseless people, and POC are the target. Another reminder that being gay doesn’t automatically make you socially aware or supportive of other disadvantaged groups.

The worst was when he dedicated a whole essay to joking that the best way to avoid houseless people you’ve interacted with before is to pretend you’re bipolar, and kept describing giving them money as “throwing” money at them. He also didn’t need to make stigmatizing, uninformed jokes about multiple personality disorder or dedicate another essay to propagating racist stereotypes about an Indian shopkeeper in his neighborhood.

There must be a way to be funny without making jokes about other people’s pain caused by their identities or conditions. The parts about him growing into his sexual identity, partying, and navigating the entertainment industry in NYC were okay. He should’ve stuck to joking about his own experiences and left other people out of it.

[Denny Patterson · Rating 3 out of 5]

I never heard of Greg Scarnici until I read this book, but it was overall enjoyable and humorous. A bit raunchy in some places, but who doesn't love some taboo?

[Steven Murphy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this book was flipping hilarious. I was driving down the road laughing out loud at these essays. Very funny. Finally, someone who is gayer than I am.

[Dario DallaLasta · Rating 4 out of 5]

Greg Scarnici is hilarious, and I want him to be my friend IRL. I mean, the ribald stories in this collection read like my real life as well, so I loved the glimpses into his NYC life. Let's just say that I can totally relate, okay? I cackled through every scenario, no doubt amusing those straphangers next to me. A quick, easy, and fun read for anyone who loves the New York nightlife, drugs and alcohol, and SNL.

[Wide Eyes, Big Ears! · Rating 3 out of 5]

Gay writer / producer / performer Greg Scarnici narrates a bunch of humorous stories about his life mostly during his coming-out years in the ‘80s and ‘90s. Well, in fact, the blurb said they were humorous — I found most of them more absurdist than funny. Most of the stories are about situations Greg found awkward, weird, or difficult and, because he narrates the audiobook in that rapid-fire pace that some New Yorkers have, it was hard to take it all in. There were a few insensitive moments and it felt like a tirade at times but the style did grow on me (currently free on the Audible Plus catalogue).

[Greg · Rating 2 out of 5]

I didn't not like this book but will I remember any of a week from now? Not likely.

[Brian Patrick · Rating 4 out of 5]

lots of lolz. lots of important pop culture dissemination. plenty of great jokes.

[Michelle Nash · Rating 4 out of 5]

NSFW but funny!

[John · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my type of read.

[John Geddie · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is normally right up my alley, but it comes off a little too mean spirited for my taste.

[The Geeky Viking · Rating 3 out of 5]

A fast, funny read, and I laughed more often than not.

[Julie Bouchonville · Rating 2 out of 5]

Im perplexed. I assumed this was supposed to be funny or comedic ? It's just a guy telling boring anecdotes implying everyone but him is 100% deranged and dumb. Cool story bro.

[Richard · Rating 3 out of 5]

This collection of short vignettes isn't particularly funny or insightful, but it is authentically queer, and that's something.