Ugh why… WHY DID I DO THIS TO MYSELF. I clearly had a momentary lapse in judgement because I knew this had two of my most hated tropes ever (namely, cheating and love triangles) yet I STILL went in regardless. I swear, I must be some sort of masochist sometimes.
There was nothing good about this book, except for the writing, which I admit was quite exceptional and the only reason for both stars. But everything else I just want to scrub from my mind — even the actually quite good smut scenes and sexy times I couldn’t seem to get into and enjoy because of all the crap behind it (and they were admittedly awesomely hot smut scenes, especially the ones between Evia and Cole).
So one of the reasons I decided to YOLO it and read this book even knowing there’s a possibility I would hate it was the fact that it had such glowing reviews and some said that the cheating was “done well” and “isn’t what you think” which are evidently FALSE NEWS (at least to me). Also because I’m anticipating My Dear Husband which centers around cheating and revenge cheating and which I will most likely read, and I wanted to “test the cheating waters” LOL. But this one did not make any sense and did not do it for me AT ALL and I stand by my I HATE CHEATING NO MATTER WHAT stance. There was NOTHING that could’ve made her want to cheat except for the fact that she was horny for her hot new neighbor despite being in a very loving, committed relationship with a man who is the father of her children, who has loved her completely and unconditionally, who dotes on her day in and day out, and who has been there for her literally EVER SINCE (like they knew each other since first grade and were officially a couple since they were like 12/13!) and has done NOTHING to deserve her infidelity and betrayal. I couldn’t for the life of me justify anything Evangeline thought, said or did. Nah fam, I couldn’t get behind a heroine like that and that took away any of the enjoyment or positive feelings I could’ve had for this book. She was so damn unlikable and so was Jake. I mean I truly can’t find it in me to respect and root for a guy (I am intentionally NOT calling him a man or a hero cause he ain't one in my book) who consciously goes for another man’s woman (a man who he even admits is a good man and someone he could've even be friends with if he wasn't lusting over his almost-wife) and he quickly decided to do it without feeling any remorse about it. At least he knows and admits he's a bastard who doesn't care about coming between a man and his almost-wife + the mother of his children. But be honest, can you really root for a guy like that?? All I can think whenever Jake comes to mind is home-wrecker. And all I can think about whenever Evangeline comes to mind is cheater. And all I can think about when this book comes to mind is such a brutal betrayal. I felt so damn bad for Cole, like he did not deserve any of this and WHY would she do this to him!!! LOL I’m obviously so damn mad for him and really, my heart broke for him and him alone. I just couldn’t find it in me to sympathize with either Evangeline or Cole.
And don’t even get me started on all the “clear conscience” thing. Just because you did not have sex together while you’re still with your significant other, does NOT mean you haven’t cheated. Cheating is cheating. You cannot base cheating on certain lines that have not been crossed. Yes, they didn’t have sex until Evie broke things off with Cole (which only happens literally at the end of the book), but they did DO EVERYTHING ELSE including the worst of it all: EMOTIONAL CHEATING. And I think, for me, that’s even worse than physical cheating cause emotions and feelings and love is involved. How can Evie say all throughout the book that she loves Cole oh so very much and will always love him when she chooses to go behind his back and flirt, touch, and allow herself to fall in love with another man—someone she barely even knows. And the fact the she kept telling this massive lie of “I’m yours, Cole. Only yours”, which she repeats to him over and over again all-throughout the book especially whenever they’re doing it when in truth, she’s truly not and SHE KNOWS IT. So that not only makes her a cheater but a liar too and someone who just strings her significant other along and give them false security. UGH yes I know, I know this is meant to be a cheating book and was pretty clear about it so I can admit it’s my fault for bringing this upon myself BUT I really don’t appreciate the fact that Evie thinks just because she didn’t go all the way with Jake while still with Cole (and while still allowing Cole to have sex with her the whole time and with her still enjoying every single second of it), does not mean she wasn’t in the wrong. She was in the wrong the moment she started thinking about Jake inappropriately which happens pretty much the moment she sees him and going behind Cole’s back no matter what she ask Jake did or didn’t do. And the golden moment when Cole called Evie out on becoming a neighborhood slut out of anger and immense betrayal (valid words if you ask me considering his situation and what she did to him) and Evie responds with this infuriating scene and these maddening words:
And that’s when I slap him. So hard, my hand stings a little. He takes a step back, shock and hurt written all over his face, along with a red mark from where my palm connected with it.
“How could you say that? Jesus, how could even think that? You know that’s not me. After everything we’ve been through, you know that’s not me, Cole!”
Like gurl were you not there when you consciously cheated on your long-time super devoted boyfriend and father of your children for no other apparent reason than you lusting and wanting your hot new neighbor??? This part really triggered me cause THE FREAKING NERVE OF THIS WOMAN. Now I just want Cole to leave her ass and find someone who is actually worthy of him. The only thing that sucks about that is Cole being heartbroken and feeling hella betrayed but I think he deserves WAY MORE than this woman. Ya I guess she and Jake deserve one another but what they don’t deserve is being happy together so I hope down the line, they get bitch-slapped by karma. Yes, I’m vindictive like that, sue me lol. Anyway, I could rant more about this book but what’s the point. Like I said, I went in knowing what to expect so it’s mostly on me. If you’re into all the angst and cheating is your thing, then you’ll probably enjoy this. But as for me… Nope, the cheating wasn’t done well and nope, I didn’t like this book. This is why I avoid cheating books like the plague and why I will continue to do so 😭
**MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW**
Safety Gang:
-TW: cheating, graphic sex, drug abuse, suicide, sexual abuse and rape (h), traumatic past
-Safe sex: no condoms used between h and her bf, condoms used between H and OW, no condoms used between H and h once they sleep together
-H age late 20s (not specifically mentioned other than around same age as h), h age 27
-No virgins
-Sex/intimate scenes with other people: h has graphic sex scenes with her bf Cole throughout the book, and H has a graphic sex scene with OW
-OW drama - H goes on a date with OW and sleeps with her which causes the h to be jealous
-OM drama - obviously the h has a long-time loving bf and is together with him for 95% of the book and causes a lot of jealousy for the H (which he doesn’t have the right to be if you ask me… lol yes I’m still salty)
-HFN ending (for the two people who doesn’t deserve it at least, but we’ll apparently have Cole’s HEA in the second book) — see… salty af 😂