SAGEBRUSH

by Helen Dunn

A lesbian & gay comedy/westernSagebrush is a busy little town on the western frontier—with plenty of problems for incompetent Sheriff Stonecroft.We first meet Stumpy Doodles, stagecoach driver and Mudhole Johnson, whose riding shotgun. On the stage is Henry Highchair, an East coast lawyer whose job is to defend outlaw Bad Bonnie Hart, but it looks as if he couldn't defend a hound dog against a flea. Gertrude Wheeze will be the new schoolmarm who will soon be wrestling a spitwad out of her ear, while trying to hide a big secret from her past. The residents already in Sagebrush are an assorted cast as well. Pearly Gates, the boardinghouse lady--who once lived with the Indians. Sunny Nagy--sort of the town orphan--who meets up with a hellbent tough, female homesteader, and many others who add to the comedic mix and a plot line that includes blackmail, romance, cross-dressing & murder!EXCERPT from Chapter 5:Arizona Albright suddenly stood up. Her chair fell backwards onto the saloon floor with a loud thunk and she shoved the table so that money, cards and chips went flying everywhere, some onto the floor and some into Henry Highchair's startled lap."I say you're a cheatin', ornery sidewinder!" Arizona accused. "You got that last ace from up your sleeve. I seen ya'! And I don't abide no cheatin', no how, no way!" Her hand hovered right above the butt of the shiny, black six shooter in its shiny, black, leather holster.Annie Milkweed came from behind the bar as fast as she could, her bountiful bosom bouncing, shouting as she "No gun play in my saloon, Arizona!" Her words came too late, Arizona's fast hand had already cleared her gun from the holster, and squeezed the trigger.A bullet zinged through the ace of hearts Henry was holding in his left hand and continued on its way – creating a hole in his bowler hat and parting his hair neatly down the middle!"Here! Here! You can have the money back." Henry exclaimed, voice shaky as he held out the bills to her, hurriedly picking up the ones that had fallen to the floor and handing them to her as well. Annie reached up and grasped Arizona's gun arm. "I won't have no killin' in my saloon!"Roberta Balls had likewise come running. Arizona looked at Roberta. "I'll leave it up to you." She said, "You call it.""Killing can get so messy." Roberta reasoned. "Just let him go." "For you, I'll spare this worthless cheater's life." Arizona promised, gazing into Roberta's eyes deeply. Annie gave a sigh of relief as Arizona holstered her gun, and then she and Roberta wandered upstairs for awhile.All Henry Highchair wanted at that moment was to get out of The Wet Spot.Outside the saloon doors, Sheriff Stonecroft had heard the shot. "Jumpin' jezzy bells!" He exclaimed. "What now!?"

148 pages, Kindle Edition

First published September 21, 2015

About the author

Librarian note: There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.

Helen Dunn is the author of “Untamed Women of Yesteryear” published by L-Books – which received honorable mention by the Golden Crown Literary Society. She has also been nominated for Favorite Lesbian Fiction Historical – by the Lesbian Fiction Readers Choice Awards group for 2011. She has written several anthologies and novels, as well as once writing a newspaper column. Helen Dunn grew up in an environment that was almost 19th century, living on dirt roads in houses that had no running water, and an ice box rather than a refrigerator with her mother cooking on a wood burning stove, while her father farmed with mules. Many of her writings have historical settings and paranormal elements in them.

Reviews

[Anna Furtado · Rating 4 out of 5]

Crazy madcap adventures of comical, quirky characters. Every time I picked up this story, I wondered why I continued to read it. Yet I couldn't seem to stop. The characters are so cliched they're hysterical and the energy is frenetic (therefore, never boring). This story about the inhabitants of an old West town called Sagebrush is a great way to escape the serousness of today's political climate. Forget your troubles - the people of Sagebrush are a lot worse off than you (plus they're hysterically funny)!