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In Order to Live: A North Korean Girl's Journey to Freedom
Yeonmi Park has told the harrowing story of her escape from North Korea as a child many times, but never before has she revealed the most intimate and devastating details of the repressive society she was raised in and the enormous price she paid to escape.
Park’s family was loving and close-knit, but life in North Korea was brutal, practically medieval. Park would regularly go without food and was made to believe that Kim Jong Il, the country’s dictator, could read her mind. After her father was imprisoned and tortured by the regime for trading on the black-market, a risk he took in order to provide for his wife and two young daughters, Yeonmi and her family were branded as criminals and forced to the cruel margins of North Korean society. With thirteen-year-old Park suffering from a botched appendectomy and weighing a mere sixty pounds, she and her mother were smuggled across the border into China.
I wasn’t dreaming of freedom when I escaped from North Korea. I didn’t even know what it meant to be free. All I knew was that if my family stayed behind, we would probably die—from starvation, from disease, from the inhuman conditions of a prison labor camp. The hunger had become unbearable; I was willing to risk my life for the promise of a bowl of rice. But there was more to our journey than our own survival. My mother and I were searching for my older sister, Eunmi, who had left for China a few days earlier and had not been heard from since.
Park knew the journey would be difficult, but could not have imagined the extent of the hardship to come. Those years in China cost Park her childhood, and nearly her life. By the time she and her mother made their way to South Korea two years later, her father was dead and her sister was still missing. Before now, only her mother knew what really happened between the time they crossed the Yalu river into China and when they followed the stars through the frigid Gobi Desert to freedom. As she writes, “I convinced myself that a lot of what I had experienced never happened. I taught myself to forget the rest.”
In In Order to Live, Park shines a light not just into the darkest corners of life in North Korea, describing the deprivation and deception she endured and which millions of North Korean people continue to endure to this day, but also onto her own most painful and difficult memories. She tells with bravery and dignity for the first time the story of how she and her mother were betrayed and sold into sexual slavery in China and forced to suffer terrible psychological and physical hardship before they finally made their way to Seoul, South Korea—and to freedom.
Still in her early twenties, Yeonmi Park has lived through experiences that few people of any age will ever know—and most people would never recover from. Park confronts her past with a startling resilience, refusing to be defeated or defined by the circumstances of her former life in North Korea and China. In spite of everything, she has never stopped being proud of where she is from, and never stopped striving for a better life. Indeed, today she is a human rights activist working determinedly to bring attention to the oppression taking place in her home country.
Park’s testimony is rare, edifying, and terribly important, and the story she tells in In Order to Live is heartbreaking and unimaginable, but never without hope. Her voice is riveting and dignified. This is the human spirit at its most indomitable.
Park’s family was loving and close-knit, but life in North Korea was brutal, practically medieval. Park would regularly go without food and was made to believe that Kim Jong Il, the country’s dictator, could read her mind. After her father was imprisoned and tortured by the regime for trading on the black-market, a risk he took in order to provide for his wife and two young daughters, Yeonmi and her family were branded as criminals and forced to the cruel margins of North Korean society. With thirteen-year-old Park suffering from a botched appendectomy and weighing a mere sixty pounds, she and her mother were smuggled across the border into China.
I wasn’t dreaming of freedom when I escaped from North Korea. I didn’t even know what it meant to be free. All I knew was that if my family stayed behind, we would probably die—from starvation, from disease, from the inhuman conditions of a prison labor camp. The hunger had become unbearable; I was willing to risk my life for the promise of a bowl of rice. But there was more to our journey than our own survival. My mother and I were searching for my older sister, Eunmi, who had left for China a few days earlier and had not been heard from since.
Park knew the journey would be difficult, but could not have imagined the extent of the hardship to come. Those years in China cost Park her childhood, and nearly her life. By the time she and her mother made their way to South Korea two years later, her father was dead and her sister was still missing. Before now, only her mother knew what really happened between the time they crossed the Yalu river into China and when they followed the stars through the frigid Gobi Desert to freedom. As she writes, “I convinced myself that a lot of what I had experienced never happened. I taught myself to forget the rest.”
In In Order to Live, Park shines a light not just into the darkest corners of life in North Korea, describing the deprivation and deception she endured and which millions of North Korean people continue to endure to this day, but also onto her own most painful and difficult memories. She tells with bravery and dignity for the first time the story of how she and her mother were betrayed and sold into sexual slavery in China and forced to suffer terrible psychological and physical hardship before they finally made their way to Seoul, South Korea—and to freedom.
Still in her early twenties, Yeonmi Park has lived through experiences that few people of any age will ever know—and most people would never recover from. Park confronts her past with a startling resilience, refusing to be defeated or defined by the circumstances of her former life in North Korea and China. In spite of everything, she has never stopped being proud of where she is from, and never stopped striving for a better life. Indeed, today she is a human rights activist working determinedly to bring attention to the oppression taking place in her home country.
Park’s testimony is rare, edifying, and terribly important, and the story she tells in In Order to Live is heartbreaking and unimaginable, but never without hope. Her voice is riveting and dignified. This is the human spirit at its most indomitable.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published September 25, 2015
5632 people are currently reading
128032 people want to read
About the author
Yeonmi Park
2 books1,356 followersPark Yeon-mi (Korean: 박연미) is a North Korean defector and human rights activist who escaped from North Korea to China in 2007 and settled in South Korea in 2009, before moving to the United States in 2014. She came from an educated, politically connected family that turned to black market trading during North Korea's economic collapse in the 1990s. After her father was sent to a labor camp for smuggling, her family faced starvation. They fled to China, where Park and her mother fell into the hands of human traffickers and was sold into slavery before escaping to Mongolia. She is now an advocate for victims of human trafficking in China and works to promote human rights in North Korea and around the globe.
Park rose to global prominence after she delivered a speech at the One Young World 2014 Summit in Dublin, Ireland — an annual summit that gathers young people from around the world to develop solutions to global problems. Her speech, about her experience escaping from North Korea, received 50 million views in two days on YouTube and social media, with a current total of more than 80 million. Her memoir In Order to Live: A North Korean Girl's Journey to Freedom was published in September 2015.
from Wikipedia
Park rose to global prominence after she delivered a speech at the One Young World 2014 Summit in Dublin, Ireland — an annual summit that gathers young people from around the world to develop solutions to global problems. Her speech, about her experience escaping from North Korea, received 50 million views in two days on YouTube and social media, with a current total of more than 80 million. Her memoir In Order to Live: A North Korean Girl's Journey to Freedom was published in September 2015.
from Wikipedia
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 10,240 reviews
January 20, 2016
I don't think any review I write for this book can do it justice. It's a truly remarkable story, but more than that, it shows a truly remarkable young woman who is resilient and hopeful even in the bleakest of moments. It's the epitome of inspiration, and I wish every single person would read this book and be inspired by it.
April 19, 2017
Some of you will probably skip reading this review since it’s a memoir and most of my friends and followers, like me are lovers of fantasy & fiction books. Believe me, memoirs or any kind of non-fiction books is a genre I avoid the most. However, after watching Yeonmi Park’s viral video on YouTube back in 2014, I was so moved and when I found out there’s a book based on her life since her birth until her escape from North Korea, I bought it straight the next day. If you decided to not read this review at all, it’s completely okay but please at least watch this video. It’s only 8 minutes long and will shed a light on how dark North Korea is. It’s not an exaggeration when people say South Korea & North Korea is Heaven & Hell on Earth.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufhKW...
That said, I’m going to say this is a book that everyone in this world must read. No one, and I seriously mean this, nobody in this world should ever experience the shits that Yeonmi and her family go through to achieve their freedom.
These days, a lot of people said North Korea is just a repressive country ruled by a fat dude with bad haircut and threaten to launch nuclear every year as if it’s an anniversary event. They joke and make memes about it while in truth, North Korea is a dystopian country with extreme Totalitarianism. If any of you read the book “Animal Farm” or “1984” by George Orwell, this is the reality manifestation of those book. Big Brother? It’s there, doublethink? it’s there, Thought Police? it’s all there in that country with different names.
“In North Korea, even arithmetic is a propaganda tool. A typical problem would go like this: “If you kill one American bastard and your comrade kills two, how many dead American bastards do you have?”
Yeonmi, being only 4 years younger than me (she’s 23 currently) had faced brutal hardships to get through to where she is now. It’s truly a wonder she could smile the way she does now.
At times while I'm reading, I forgot that I’m reading a non-fiction book because it was so fucked up, especially what she went through when she’s 13-15 years old. This story is as real as it gets, it happened and it's still happening to countless people who tried to escape from North Korea. The least we can do is to be aware of this situation.
Yeonmi wrote this book with the purpose that more people will listen to her story and know the reality that resides in North Korea even though this means putting her life in danger as she's now being branded as a public enemy to the whole country where she's born. At the same time she's also letting us know that in the darkest situation, there’s always hope to be found. I listened to her story, I'm inspired and I cared. If somehow my review could reach just one more person to know her story then I’ll be satisfied. Doesn’t matter if you’re a fan of fantasy, sci-fi, romance, YA, or any other genre, this is a book that everyone must read.
Rant section:
I lowered the score of this book because sometimes I feel the writings are too simple, there's some typos and they made me feel detached. However, I’m seriously disappointed with those who lowered their score because of the reason saying her stories are fakes and fabrications. Seriously what is the matter with you? Look, her details can be wrong sometimes, she's diagnosed with PTSD and depression after everything she went through. The book itself could be mistranslated but really, I challenge you to try remembering every detail of your life since your birth until now, let’s see if you get them right 100%. Heck, I can’t even remember a lot of things from my childhood until middle school. I have a friend who experienced one harsh thing that happened to Yeonmi and trust me, asking her to remember that detail over and over again is like putting a knife in her heart and brain repeatedly. Doing this is like saying she’s the biggest liar of the world, if we won’t trust her story then who will?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufhKW...
That said, I’m going to say this is a book that everyone in this world must read. No one, and I seriously mean this, nobody in this world should ever experience the shits that Yeonmi and her family go through to achieve their freedom.
These days, a lot of people said North Korea is just a repressive country ruled by a fat dude with bad haircut and threaten to launch nuclear every year as if it’s an anniversary event. They joke and make memes about it while in truth, North Korea is a dystopian country with extreme Totalitarianism. If any of you read the book “Animal Farm” or “1984” by George Orwell, this is the reality manifestation of those book. Big Brother? It’s there, doublethink? it’s there, Thought Police? it’s all there in that country with different names.
“In North Korea, even arithmetic is a propaganda tool. A typical problem would go like this: “If you kill one American bastard and your comrade kills two, how many dead American bastards do you have?”
Yeonmi, being only 4 years younger than me (she’s 23 currently) had faced brutal hardships to get through to where she is now. It’s truly a wonder she could smile the way she does now.
At times while I'm reading, I forgot that I’m reading a non-fiction book because it was so fucked up, especially what she went through when she’s 13-15 years old. This story is as real as it gets, it happened and it's still happening to countless people who tried to escape from North Korea. The least we can do is to be aware of this situation.
Yeonmi wrote this book with the purpose that more people will listen to her story and know the reality that resides in North Korea even though this means putting her life in danger as she's now being branded as a public enemy to the whole country where she's born. At the same time she's also letting us know that in the darkest situation, there’s always hope to be found. I listened to her story, I'm inspired and I cared. If somehow my review could reach just one more person to know her story then I’ll be satisfied. Doesn’t matter if you’re a fan of fantasy, sci-fi, romance, YA, or any other genre, this is a book that everyone must read.
Rant section:
I lowered the score of this book because sometimes I feel the writings are too simple, there's some typos and they made me feel detached. However, I’m seriously disappointed with those who lowered their score because of the reason saying her stories are fakes and fabrications. Seriously what is the matter with you? Look, her details can be wrong sometimes, she's diagnosed with PTSD and depression after everything she went through. The book itself could be mistranslated but really, I challenge you to try remembering every detail of your life since your birth until now, let’s see if you get them right 100%. Heck, I can’t even remember a lot of things from my childhood until middle school. I have a friend who experienced one harsh thing that happened to Yeonmi and trust me, asking her to remember that detail over and over again is like putting a knife in her heart and brain repeatedly. Doing this is like saying she’s the biggest liar of the world, if we won’t trust her story then who will?
June 15, 2021
Update 15 June 2021. NYPost Jane Austen is getting cancelled! Yeonmi Park says that freedom in the US is going the way of North Korea - she is now in Columbia university
"A professor asked who the class who liked classical books, like Jane Austen.
'I said, 'I love those books. I thought it was a good thing.'
'Then she said, 'Did you know those writers had a colonial mindset? They were racists and bigots and are subconsciously brainwashing you."
Park warned that Americans were censoring and silencing each other through cancel culture.
'Voluntarily, these people are censoring each other, silencing each other, no force behind it,' she said. 'Other times (in history) there's a military coup d'etat, like a force comes in taking your rights away and silencing you. But this country is choosing to be silenced, choosing to give their rights away.' 'I guess that's what they want,' she said,' to destroy every single thing and rebuild into a communist paradise.'
When Prince Philip died, a librarian in Kings College, London, circulated a photo of him opening the library. She was forced to withdraw it and apologise for the 'harm' it caused as he had made racist and sexist statements in the past. A couple of days ago, it was reported that the same college had honoured an ex-student, Teresa Cheng, China's hardline justice minister with a fellowship, despite her central role (for which the US censured her) in cracking down on the pro-democracy movement movement in Hong Kong.
I think I'm going to have to reread the book and rethink my review in light of this interview with the author. It adds to my knowledge of her and what she went through in a way I wasn't aware of.
Review to be revised
"A professor asked who the class who liked classical books, like Jane Austen.
'I said, 'I love those books. I thought it was a good thing.'
'Then she said, 'Did you know those writers had a colonial mindset? They were racists and bigots and are subconsciously brainwashing you."
Park warned that Americans were censoring and silencing each other through cancel culture.
'Voluntarily, these people are censoring each other, silencing each other, no force behind it,' she said. 'Other times (in history) there's a military coup d'etat, like a force comes in taking your rights away and silencing you. But this country is choosing to be silenced, choosing to give their rights away.' 'I guess that's what they want,' she said,' to destroy every single thing and rebuild into a communist paradise.'
When Prince Philip died, a librarian in Kings College, London, circulated a photo of him opening the library. She was forced to withdraw it and apologise for the 'harm' it caused as he had made racist and sexist statements in the past. A couple of days ago, it was reported that the same college had honoured an ex-student, Teresa Cheng, China's hardline justice minister with a fellowship, despite her central role (for which the US censured her) in cracking down on the pro-democracy movement movement in Hong Kong.
I think I'm going to have to reread the book and rethink my review in light of this interview with the author. It adds to my knowledge of her and what she went through in a way I wasn't aware of.
Review to be revised
June 25, 2017
4.5 stars
everything hurts and i'm crying
This book just makes you take 10 seats. It's a story I can't even fathom being in. It's like an actual dystopia. Everything was so outrageous and haunting that it was almost unbelievable.
What I found myself enjoying was not just Yeonmi finding physical freedom outside the borders of North Korea and the human trafficking industry, but the mental freedom of learning how to be opinionated and advocating for others' rights. This book is so touching, but so sad.
I took off half a star because although it was an interesting story, the writing wasn't particularly beautiful and flowing, it was just okay. Because of that, it took me a little bit longer to read because it takes longer to get into, but it's not like it's a major issue because after all, english is practically her third language.
everything hurts and i'm crying
This book just makes you take 10 seats. It's a story I can't even fathom being in. It's like an actual dystopia. Everything was so outrageous and haunting that it was almost unbelievable.
What I found myself enjoying was not just Yeonmi finding physical freedom outside the borders of North Korea and the human trafficking industry, but the mental freedom of learning how to be opinionated and advocating for others' rights. This book is so touching, but so sad.
I took off half a star because although it was an interesting story, the writing wasn't particularly beautiful and flowing, it was just okay. Because of that, it took me a little bit longer to read because it takes longer to get into, but it's not like it's a major issue because after all, english is practically her third language.
August 3, 2021
Shameless. This is one of the most frustrating readings I had, not because the writing is bad (on the contrary, the touch of a well versed editor is obvious), but because I simply cannot understand how a story that clearly has A LOT of holes in it can be held in such a high regard.
Nothing adds up in Yeonmi Park's book, but nobody seems to care. This should be a red flag for all of us, since it shows that people look for personal heroes and inspiring success stories whatever the cost. Everybody is more than ready to acknowledge and show their support for yet another hero overcoming all obstacles, but what about the half of the book that doesn't seem real at all? If Park adds some lies here and there to make her book more empowering and appealing to the public, shouldn't it rise any kind of suspicion about the overall truthfulness of the story? What if those lies are actually gross exaggerations?
Park starts by telling us about her harsh childhood in a very modest family. However, her father has a great sense for business, and starts smuggling gold and such out of North Korea. She admits that he was a party member, but never mentions his rank in there. My guess is that he had a very comfortable high position, since I doubt that you'd be able to smuggle gold out of a communist country by only bribing low level officials and cops. This discredits her "humble beginning", and probably South Koreans reached the same conclusion when they started calling her the Paris Hilton of North Korea. She goes on with her story, and than she mentions that her father was able to escape prison by promising an incredible bribe to the prison warden. Of course, they were very poor and had no such money, but that was the end of it.
In the meantime, the love theme is casually inserted in the story, when a rich, smart, cool and older (I am running out of adjectives) kid falls for the 13 year Park, despite the social class gap.
Soon after, she and her mother escape to China where they fall in the hand of human traffickers. Here, Chinese brokers rape Korean women left and right, but they never manage to rape Park because she screams and kicks. I'm guessing that the other ones never came up with this solution...
She finally gives in to rape when a big Chinese "gangster" offers to help her entire family if she sleeps with him. This deal naturally evolves in Park being the gangster's right arm in the human trafficking business. This is because Chinese gangsters probably don't have any kind of entourage, and they are in need of 13 year olds to keep the business going. Park mentions that she was prematurely born at 7 months, and that she always was smaller than the rest of the kids. However, this doesn't stop her to convince everybody that she is much older, while practically handling North Korean slaves across rural China.
The love theme is then reintroduced with the entrance of a new bigger "gangster" who kidnaps and also tries to rape her. The previous gangster (practically her partner) wants to get her back, and the love triangle breaks when gang wars are close to start in the city for the sake of Park. She really expects the readers to buy this... And apparently they did.
In passing she is also mentioning having an abortion, but it probably isn't that important in the grand scheme of things.
She then proceeds to do video chat with her mother in order to gain money to escape to South Korea. But while other girls had to strip for their clients, Park managed to build one of the most popular video chat channels by simply talking with her customers, and never taking her clothes off. But there is more! While video chatting she meets a nice South Korean guy who flies to China to simply help her with some money.
Then, Park reaches South Korea where she manages to get from a second grade level to being admitted to a prestigious university in little less than two years. Her sister did it even quicker than that, so what's up with the South Korean educational system? Of course, she is bullied in school by the rich, cool kids.
She than decides to have some TV appearances hoping to find her long lost sister. It doesn't matter that in some of those appearances she was wearing a lot of makeup (even her classmates failed to recognize her and first) and also had a fake name.
These are just a few parts of the story that smell fishy.
Of course, Yeonmi Park did a great job with her book. Let the royalties come! Meanwhile, the rest of us are giving her credit while spending a lot of money on a over-hyped book. Honestly, I would have expected that by now some sort of boycott should have happened out of respect for actual rape victims, human traffic victims and oppressed people in general.
I want my 20 pounds back.
Nothing adds up in Yeonmi Park's book, but nobody seems to care. This should be a red flag for all of us, since it shows that people look for personal heroes and inspiring success stories whatever the cost. Everybody is more than ready to acknowledge and show their support for yet another hero overcoming all obstacles, but what about the half of the book that doesn't seem real at all? If Park adds some lies here and there to make her book more empowering and appealing to the public, shouldn't it rise any kind of suspicion about the overall truthfulness of the story? What if those lies are actually gross exaggerations?
Park starts by telling us about her harsh childhood in a very modest family. However, her father has a great sense for business, and starts smuggling gold and such out of North Korea. She admits that he was a party member, but never mentions his rank in there. My guess is that he had a very comfortable high position, since I doubt that you'd be able to smuggle gold out of a communist country by only bribing low level officials and cops. This discredits her "humble beginning", and probably South Koreans reached the same conclusion when they started calling her the Paris Hilton of North Korea. She goes on with her story, and than she mentions that her father was able to escape prison by promising an incredible bribe to the prison warden. Of course, they were very poor and had no such money, but that was the end of it.
In the meantime, the love theme is casually inserted in the story, when a rich, smart, cool and older (I am running out of adjectives) kid falls for the 13 year Park, despite the social class gap.
Soon after, she and her mother escape to China where they fall in the hand of human traffickers. Here, Chinese brokers rape Korean women left and right, but they never manage to rape Park because she screams and kicks. I'm guessing that the other ones never came up with this solution...
She finally gives in to rape when a big Chinese "gangster" offers to help her entire family if she sleeps with him. This deal naturally evolves in Park being the gangster's right arm in the human trafficking business. This is because Chinese gangsters probably don't have any kind of entourage, and they are in need of 13 year olds to keep the business going. Park mentions that she was prematurely born at 7 months, and that she always was smaller than the rest of the kids. However, this doesn't stop her to convince everybody that she is much older, while practically handling North Korean slaves across rural China.
The love theme is then reintroduced with the entrance of a new bigger "gangster" who kidnaps and also tries to rape her. The previous gangster (practically her partner) wants to get her back, and the love triangle breaks when gang wars are close to start in the city for the sake of Park. She really expects the readers to buy this... And apparently they did.
In passing she is also mentioning having an abortion, but it probably isn't that important in the grand scheme of things.
She then proceeds to do video chat with her mother in order to gain money to escape to South Korea. But while other girls had to strip for their clients, Park managed to build one of the most popular video chat channels by simply talking with her customers, and never taking her clothes off. But there is more! While video chatting she meets a nice South Korean guy who flies to China to simply help her with some money.
Then, Park reaches South Korea where she manages to get from a second grade level to being admitted to a prestigious university in little less than two years. Her sister did it even quicker than that, so what's up with the South Korean educational system? Of course, she is bullied in school by the rich, cool kids.
She than decides to have some TV appearances hoping to find her long lost sister. It doesn't matter that in some of those appearances she was wearing a lot of makeup (even her classmates failed to recognize her and first) and also had a fake name.
These are just a few parts of the story that smell fishy.
Of course, Yeonmi Park did a great job with her book. Let the royalties come! Meanwhile, the rest of us are giving her credit while spending a lot of money on a over-hyped book. Honestly, I would have expected that by now some sort of boycott should have happened out of respect for actual rape victims, human traffic victims and oppressed people in general.
I want my 20 pounds back.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 17, 2024
The book is titled In Order to “Live” rather than "Survive," but before Yeonmi escaped to South Korea, her family's efforts were more about avoiding hunger. In North Korea, human rights are reduced to an unimaginable extent. Yeonmi’s family was considered wealthy by North Korean standards: they could eat rice 3 times a day, eat meat 2 or 3 times a month, afford medical treatment, and have basic toiletries like shampoo and toothpaste. This level of material life was already above the living standards of most North Korean families around the year 2000.
Basic human rights are not guaranteed, and women's rights are even more deplorable. Yeonmi recounts that her father was an enlightened man. Unlike other families where women were afraid to make noise with their chopsticks for fear of being beaten, Yeonmi’s father "even" allowed her and her sister to eat at the table. He rarely hit their mother, but when he drank too much, he still would...
North Korea's extreme patriarchal values make everyone worship their fathers, and they must also worship their dear leader in the same way. Through Yeonmi’s descriptions, I learned that many North Koreans' love for their leader is genuinely "from the heart." North Korea's brainwashing of its people is like an endless thought experiment that starts from birth. In an environment completely isolated from the outside world, everything they hear and see is propaganda. From the morning broadcasts praising the leader to the air they breathe, it's all pervasive. Even during the famine of the 1990s, it was blamed on foreign forces, and the leader encouraged people to eat only 2 meals a day instead of opening the market. Starving people on the streets became so common that basic human sympathy was worn away. To survive, those who didn't starve had to shut off their emotions and become numb.
After Yeonmi’s father, who brought a modest living, was arrested for black market trading, her family fell into despair. Her mother wandered around to help her father and later ended up in prison herself, leaving Yeonmi and her sister to fend for themselves. The small bag of rice their mother left was quickly consumed, and electricity was scarce. During that cold winter, they foraged for plants on the mountain, roasted dragonflies to eat, and without the strength to chop wood for fire, they huddled together at night in their ice - cold house for warmth.
The period when they escaped to China is even more harrowing to read. It turns out that female defectors are more likely to escape because they can be sold by human traffickers. From the border to northeastern China, selling female defectors to rural areas as "slave brides" is a mature industry chain. Even more infuriating is that before being handed over to middlemen, they are often raped. Yeonmi witnessed her mother being raped twice. This is the part she is most reluctant to face, to the extent that she avoids mentioning it when speaking to Western media. Behind these inhumane experiences is the result of "great power games." These abused and trafficked women dare not escape or resist because defectors are not accepted as refugees locally. If discovered, they will be repatriated to North Korea, where "traitors" face severe punishment, even death. Thus, under the threat of local traffickers and the lure of not starving, these women fall into another hell.
In April 2009, Yeonmi and her mother finally reached South Korea. However, freedom is like oxygen; taking in too much at once can make you dizzy. After being taught how to live in South Korea at a counseling center and finally receiving an education, Yeonmi lamented: ”I never knew freedom could be such a cruel and difficult thing. Until now, I had always thought that being free meant being able to wear jeans and watch whatever movies I wanted without worrying about being arrested. Now I realized that I had to think all the time - and it was exhausting. There were times when I wondered whether, if it wasn’t for the constant hunger, I would be better off in North Korea, where all my thinking and all my choices were taken care of for me." Upon waking from that cruel "thought experiment," she realized that freedom means choice and constant thinking. I think this is also the situation for many older Chinese. Accustomed to a life arranged for them, once they have the right to choose, they feel lost and lose confidence in themselves. We are all, to some extent, victims of this thought experiment.
Yeonmi’s story continues. She later became a human rights activist, speaking out about her experiences in many important media outlets. Ironically, whether influenced by certain factors or due to her tragic and unique experiences, people began to expose her "inconsistencies" online and even accused her of writing the book for "attention." Thus, her harrowing experiences became just another spectacle for those eager to watch "beheadings." When she published her second book, public opinion shifted to her figure and appearance.
Unfortunately, "thought experiments" exist in every country, and there are many who are unwilling to wake up.
3.9 / 5 stars
Basic human rights are not guaranteed, and women's rights are even more deplorable. Yeonmi recounts that her father was an enlightened man. Unlike other families where women were afraid to make noise with their chopsticks for fear of being beaten, Yeonmi’s father "even" allowed her and her sister to eat at the table. He rarely hit their mother, but when he drank too much, he still would...
North Korea's extreme patriarchal values make everyone worship their fathers, and they must also worship their dear leader in the same way. Through Yeonmi’s descriptions, I learned that many North Koreans' love for their leader is genuinely "from the heart." North Korea's brainwashing of its people is like an endless thought experiment that starts from birth. In an environment completely isolated from the outside world, everything they hear and see is propaganda. From the morning broadcasts praising the leader to the air they breathe, it's all pervasive. Even during the famine of the 1990s, it was blamed on foreign forces, and the leader encouraged people to eat only 2 meals a day instead of opening the market. Starving people on the streets became so common that basic human sympathy was worn away. To survive, those who didn't starve had to shut off their emotions and become numb.
After Yeonmi’s father, who brought a modest living, was arrested for black market trading, her family fell into despair. Her mother wandered around to help her father and later ended up in prison herself, leaving Yeonmi and her sister to fend for themselves. The small bag of rice their mother left was quickly consumed, and electricity was scarce. During that cold winter, they foraged for plants on the mountain, roasted dragonflies to eat, and without the strength to chop wood for fire, they huddled together at night in their ice - cold house for warmth.
The period when they escaped to China is even more harrowing to read. It turns out that female defectors are more likely to escape because they can be sold by human traffickers. From the border to northeastern China, selling female defectors to rural areas as "slave brides" is a mature industry chain. Even more infuriating is that before being handed over to middlemen, they are often raped. Yeonmi witnessed her mother being raped twice. This is the part she is most reluctant to face, to the extent that she avoids mentioning it when speaking to Western media. Behind these inhumane experiences is the result of "great power games." These abused and trafficked women dare not escape or resist because defectors are not accepted as refugees locally. If discovered, they will be repatriated to North Korea, where "traitors" face severe punishment, even death. Thus, under the threat of local traffickers and the lure of not starving, these women fall into another hell.
In April 2009, Yeonmi and her mother finally reached South Korea. However, freedom is like oxygen; taking in too much at once can make you dizzy. After being taught how to live in South Korea at a counseling center and finally receiving an education, Yeonmi lamented: ”I never knew freedom could be such a cruel and difficult thing. Until now, I had always thought that being free meant being able to wear jeans and watch whatever movies I wanted without worrying about being arrested. Now I realized that I had to think all the time - and it was exhausting. There were times when I wondered whether, if it wasn’t for the constant hunger, I would be better off in North Korea, where all my thinking and all my choices were taken care of for me." Upon waking from that cruel "thought experiment," she realized that freedom means choice and constant thinking. I think this is also the situation for many older Chinese. Accustomed to a life arranged for them, once they have the right to choose, they feel lost and lose confidence in themselves. We are all, to some extent, victims of this thought experiment.
Yeonmi’s story continues. She later became a human rights activist, speaking out about her experiences in many important media outlets. Ironically, whether influenced by certain factors or due to her tragic and unique experiences, people began to expose her "inconsistencies" online and even accused her of writing the book for "attention." Thus, her harrowing experiences became just another spectacle for those eager to watch "beheadings." When she published her second book, public opinion shifted to her figure and appearance.
Unfortunately, "thought experiments" exist in every country, and there are many who are unwilling to wake up.
3.9 / 5 stars
March 29, 2016
I honestly don't even know what to say. What can you possibly say after reading Yeonmi's story? Completely heartbreaking and horrific, yet inspiring all at once.
Around the Year in 52 Books Challenge Notes:
- 19. A non-fiction book
Around the Year in 52 Books Challenge Notes:
- 19. A non-fiction book
January 29, 2023
So my journey with this book and author is messy to say the least. I enjoyed In Order to Live and minus what I found out about the author later, I would have given it a strong four stars. Yeonmi Park exemplifies courage in sharing her experience as a North Korean defector, including her family’s struggle with poverty, the physical difficulty of her escape from North Korea to China to Mongolia to South Korea, and the brutal and horrible sexual assault she and her mother faced throughout the process. The writing in this memoir is clear and accessible, detailed yet sparse enough to keep the momentum of Park’s story moving.
On a whim, though, I looked up the author and saw that she’s become a proponent of right-wing political ideology (e.g., transphobia, anti-Black racism, support of Donald Trump, etc.)?? Beyond her support of oppressive ideologies, her logic is awful – like in the tweet about transphobia, of course you can care about humans rights abuses like murder and starvation and also care about trans rights?? It’s sad that given what she’s went through, she’s now enacting social injustice herself. I guess I’ll give this book three stars though I’m conflicted even with that.
On a whim, though, I looked up the author and saw that she’s become a proponent of right-wing political ideology (e.g., transphobia, anti-Black racism, support of Donald Trump, etc.)?? Beyond her support of oppressive ideologies, her logic is awful – like in the tweet about transphobia, of course you can care about humans rights abuses like murder and starvation and also care about trans rights?? It’s sad that given what she’s went through, she’s now enacting social injustice herself. I guess I’ll give this book three stars though I’m conflicted even with that.
February 21, 2018
This is one of the most important books I’ve read in my life!
“In Order to Live” tells the true story of Yeonmi and her family growing up in the dictatorship of North Korea. Yeonmi is very honest from the beginning, and her story tells about the bravery she and her family had to have in order to escape North Korea and survive.
I knew a little bit about North Korea beforehand, but this book was an eye-opener! Never have I imagined what the truth is actually like for North Korean people, and it was devastating to read about famine, extreme poverty, and schools where even mathematics were turned into propaganda to enforce the North Korean regime and diminish the “nasty Yankees” from America.
However, this story also tells us the nastiness of human trafficking in China and how Yeonmi and her family were forced into situations they have felt ashamed of ever since. I’m not going to say anymore here because Yeonmi’s account is simply honest, educating and truly truly important.
Read this book to educate yourself on what is really going on in this world. This is the truth told from the source, and it is eye-opening, devastating, but so so important!
“In Order to Live” tells the true story of Yeonmi and her family growing up in the dictatorship of North Korea. Yeonmi is very honest from the beginning, and her story tells about the bravery she and her family had to have in order to escape North Korea and survive.
I knew a little bit about North Korea beforehand, but this book was an eye-opener! Never have I imagined what the truth is actually like for North Korean people, and it was devastating to read about famine, extreme poverty, and schools where even mathematics were turned into propaganda to enforce the North Korean regime and diminish the “nasty Yankees” from America.
However, this story also tells us the nastiness of human trafficking in China and how Yeonmi and her family were forced into situations they have felt ashamed of ever since. I’m not going to say anymore here because Yeonmi’s account is simply honest, educating and truly truly important.
Read this book to educate yourself on what is really going on in this world. This is the truth told from the source, and it is eye-opening, devastating, but so so important!
November 10, 2015
I'm not normally an autobiography fan. I mostly read fiction. But Yeonmi's story is just... you know how they say truth is stranger than fiction? That.
We have to bear in mind here that I met the lovely, kind and humble lady herself before I read this. I'll hold my hands up that that probably had an impact on how much this book touched me.
Split into three parts to document her escape from North Korea, set in NK, China and South Korea, the account is heartbreaking, fascinating and punctuated by the odd bit of humour that translates perfectly from the personality I met - she learned early to hide her suffering behind a mask.
A frightening and fascinating look into life inside North Korea under the Kims' rule, human trafficking in China and the 'reeducaion' of defectors in South Korea, I feel privileged to have met Yeonmi, and wish her every luck in the world in her fight to find justice and reunite Korea.
We have to bear in mind here that I met the lovely, kind and humble lady herself before I read this. I'll hold my hands up that that probably had an impact on how much this book touched me.
Split into three parts to document her escape from North Korea, set in NK, China and South Korea, the account is heartbreaking, fascinating and punctuated by the odd bit of humour that translates perfectly from the personality I met - she learned early to hide her suffering behind a mask.
A frightening and fascinating look into life inside North Korea under the Kims' rule, human trafficking in China and the 'reeducaion' of defectors in South Korea, I feel privileged to have met Yeonmi, and wish her every luck in the world in her fight to find justice and reunite Korea.
January 14, 2021
کتاب در مورد فرار یک دختر همراه مادرش از کره شمالیه که به دنبال خواهرش که فرار کرده هستش که میخوان پیداش کنن.
در مورد زندگیش تو کره شمالی میگه و فرارش و در آخر اینکه چطور بعد فرارش با جامعه جدید اخت پیدا میکنه.
کتاب بیشتر روی قاچاق انسان از کره شمالی به چین مانور میده و اینکه چطور نویسنده و مادرش دچارش شدن.
مثلا مادر�� برای اینکه به دخترش تجاوز نکنن خودشو در اختیار دلال ها قرار میده اما سرانجام بعد از اینکه مامانشو میفروشن به خودش هم تجاوز میشه!!!!
اما در نهایت با تحمل کردن بسیاری از مشکلات به کره جنوبی میرسن و اونجا زندگی تازه ایی رو شروع میکنن.
یه چیز واسم جالب بود واسه اینکه انگلیسی یاد بگیره میرفت فرندز نگاه میکرد :دی فک میکردم فقط ایرانیا این کارو میکنن ولی فک کنم همه دنیا این کارو میکنن.
در مورد زندگیش تو کره شمالی میگه و فرارش و در آخر اینکه چطور بعد فرارش با جامعه جدید اخت پیدا میکنه.
کتاب بیشتر روی قاچاق انسان از کره شمالی به چین مانور میده و اینکه چطور نویسنده و مادرش دچارش شدن.
مثلا مادر�� برای اینکه به دخترش تجاوز نکنن خودشو در اختیار دلال ها قرار میده اما سرانجام بعد از اینکه مامانشو میفروشن به خودش هم تجاوز میشه!!!!
اما در نهایت با تحمل کردن بسیاری از مشکلات به کره جنوبی میرسن و اونجا زندگی تازه ایی رو شروع میکنن.
یه چیز واسم جالب بود واسه اینکه انگلیسی یاد بگیره میرفت فرندز نگاه میکرد :دی فک میکردم فقط ایرانیا این کارو میکنن ولی فک کنم همه دنیا این کارو میکنن.
March 24, 2017
Shifting focus on this biography journey away from men with significant power, I wanted to find a piece that would not only educate, but also exemplify some of the struggles of the common person. That this is also a buddy read with a good friend of mine only adds to the interest when it was suggested I read this memoir by Yeonmi Park. Growing up in North Korea, Park offers the reader some history of the country and the autocratic Kim Family dynasty, some of which directly related to her own ancestors' story. Thereafter, Park personalises the story to discuss her backstory, a life on the cusp of abject poverty and general servitude to the Great Country, which included a vignette about gathering an annual faeces quota to help with collective farming, alarming and yet somewhat humerous at times as well. After secretly paving the way to make an escape, Park and her mother cross a small tributary into China, where things are anything but manna from heaven. Supporting a policy of returning North Korean defectors, the Chinese are on the lookout for those who might have snuck across the border. Park explores the treachery that awaited her in China and a life that paralleled the agony of North Korea when she found herself being trafficked. It was only a firm motivation to make her way to South Korea that kept Yeonmi strong and prepared for freedom, a dream that Christian missionaries sought to fulfil. While many take freedom for granted, Park offers an interesting perspective of South Korean freedom, which might provide much sobriety for the reader. Full of tears and angst, Park does not coat her story with flowery tales and sing-song moments, while transitioning from the darkest corners of one country about which the world knows so little. A powerful piece that pulls on the heartstrings of all but the most detached readers, Park provides a degree of determination that no obstacle is insurmountable.
I went into this book sure that I would come out with a ton of information grounded in reality, not solely western propaganda seeking to kick the Kim family around and exploit their suppressive ways. To hear directly from one who has lived in these conditions and seen the horrors of starvation speaks volumes to me. I found myself needing to keep my academic hat firmly in place and remind myself that someone has synthesised this book before it went to print, even though Park professes to have a strong grip on the English language by the time she completed her draft. Adding layers of oppression and making the light of freedom look all the better will sell books, especially to complement the media reports of increased aggression and assassination of familial members, though part of me could not help but accept the stories that fill these pages as being more realistic than reserve-propaganda. Full of the dark sides that these types of stories have to offer, the reader must stomach death, neglect, rape, and even criticism of that which many of us take for granted. Park's surprising openness about the problems with freedom should not be taken lightly by the reader, as she makes a strong case about the perils of removing those who had no choices and supersaturating them with options and pathways. The story was her own, but adding a familial element helped strengthen its delivery and permitted the reader to see how desperate some were to leave North Korea, that they would abandon family to pave the way towards a better life. An underlying theme of political ideology surely finds its way into the discussion, from the Korean War, Soviet-style communism, to the eventual isolated sentimentality that even Mao would not have recognised. One is left to wonder what would be best for North Koreans, especially since most appear less than truly happy, if one is to believe the accounts that Park offers herein. Should people be oppressed or live in a society that does not offer democracy for all citizens? That is up to the reader to decide, though Park provides wonderful insight to open a substantial debate.
Kudos, Madam Park for this honest portrayal of the pains of your motherland and trying to recalibrate in a society only too happy to pile on the criticism. You are monumentally strong for all you have seen and weathered. I hope you will provide a follow-up in the years to come.
Love/hate the review? An ever-growing collection of others appears at:
http://pecheyponderings.wordpress.com/
I went into this book sure that I would come out with a ton of information grounded in reality, not solely western propaganda seeking to kick the Kim family around and exploit their suppressive ways. To hear directly from one who has lived in these conditions and seen the horrors of starvation speaks volumes to me. I found myself needing to keep my academic hat firmly in place and remind myself that someone has synthesised this book before it went to print, even though Park professes to have a strong grip on the English language by the time she completed her draft. Adding layers of oppression and making the light of freedom look all the better will sell books, especially to complement the media reports of increased aggression and assassination of familial members, though part of me could not help but accept the stories that fill these pages as being more realistic than reserve-propaganda. Full of the dark sides that these types of stories have to offer, the reader must stomach death, neglect, rape, and even criticism of that which many of us take for granted. Park's surprising openness about the problems with freedom should not be taken lightly by the reader, as she makes a strong case about the perils of removing those who had no choices and supersaturating them with options and pathways. The story was her own, but adding a familial element helped strengthen its delivery and permitted the reader to see how desperate some were to leave North Korea, that they would abandon family to pave the way towards a better life. An underlying theme of political ideology surely finds its way into the discussion, from the Korean War, Soviet-style communism, to the eventual isolated sentimentality that even Mao would not have recognised. One is left to wonder what would be best for North Koreans, especially since most appear less than truly happy, if one is to believe the accounts that Park offers herein. Should people be oppressed or live in a society that does not offer democracy for all citizens? That is up to the reader to decide, though Park provides wonderful insight to open a substantial debate.
Kudos, Madam Park for this honest portrayal of the pains of your motherland and trying to recalibrate in a society only too happy to pile on the criticism. You are monumentally strong for all you have seen and weathered. I hope you will provide a follow-up in the years to come.
Love/hate the review? An ever-growing collection of others appears at:
http://pecheyponderings.wordpress.com/
May 19, 2021
I'm six years late to this party, but - no surprises here - this was heartbreaking and inspiring.
April 16, 2022
Read this to get myself out of the slump, instead it put me into the state of depression
January 23, 2024
The stories mentioned in the book would have been fascinating & extraordinary if they were all true. However, base on many online articles & videos, the author lied on many of her recollections as a defector. I felt disgusted to have invested time & energy into reading about a person who is actually just a big fraud. Yeonmi Park gives Koreans a bad name. If someone really wants to read about the actual experiences of a female North Korean defector I would recommend the book The Girl With Seven Names by Hyeonseo Lee.
August 9, 2018
WOW! This book was just impactful because it's full of a very young woman's strength, endurance and emotions. I loved every bit of it, and I admire Park with all my heart.
Full review coming soon.
Full review coming soon.
January 20, 2026
LT/ ENG
Šiaurės Korėja, patirtys iš ten, skaitoma literatūra apie tai, atrodo tarsi šiuo metu ypatingi, egzotiški zoologijos sode esantys žvėreliai, kuriuos turi būtinai pamatyti, išgirsti, apie kuriuos rašo visi soc tinklai bet jie yra ten..kažkur už gardo, stiklo sienos..Trendas?.. tuo pačiu tai kas paslėpta, nesuprantama- masina, tarsi medus...
Taip norėtųsi tikėti, kad mes, tie- už sienos, skaitantys šias istorijas, ar tie, kurie dalinasi šiomis istorijomis, būtume katalizatoriais įvyksiančio stebuklo, gal...ne už metų, ar dviejų, gal už dešimtmečio..
Skaičiau tarsi istorijos vadovėlį, dokumentiką, kuris gerokai skiriasi nuo "Upės tamsoje".
Ar aš būdama tokioje aplinkoje suprasčiau knygoje aprašomus priimtus sprendimus? Visgi gyvenant čia ir dabar- nors ir kiek būčiau empatiška- negaliu...
TEN...ne-savo nuomonei, ne- kritiniam mąstymui, ne- reiškiamiems jausmams, ne- elementarioms žmogiškoms emocijoms, ne- žodžiui, ne-spalvoms, išskyrus juoda- balta, ne-žmogiškumui!. Visus šiuos tuščius indus, autorei persikėlus į P.Korėją, reikėjo užpildyti, išmokti naudotis tarsi naujais įrankiais.
🖋️Emocinė diktatūra. Šiaurės Korėjos valdžiai negana kontroliuoti, kur nuvykti, ką išmoksti, kur dirbo ir ką sakai. Jiems taip pat reikia kontroliuoti ir tave patį, tavo emocijas. Paversti tave valstybės vergų, sunaikinant bet kokią individualybę ir palaužiant gebėjimą reaguoti į aplinkybes, remiantis platesne pasaulio pažinimo patirtimi.
🖋️Visi išmokstame galvoti vienu protu.
🖋️mes, šiaurės korėjiečiai, sugebame nepriekaištingai meluoti-net ir patys sau..
🖋️Šiaurės Korėjoje pavasaris yra mirties sezonas.
🖋️Nusipelniau būti laikoma žmogumi, o ne medžiojamu gyvūnu.
🖋️Beveik dvejus metus gyvenau taip, tarsi visi penki mano pojūčiai būtų atbukę. Nesugebėjau jausti, užuost, matyti, išgirsti ar paragauti mane supusio pasaulio. Jei būčiau leidusi sau tuos dalykus patirtivisu jų intensyvumu, ko gero, būčiau netekusi proto.
🖋️Kai buvau maža, svajojau turėti visą kibirą duonos. Nuo šiol mano svajonės įgavo didybės (pradėjus mokytis universitete)
🖋️Visi turime savo dykumas. Galbūt jos ne tokios pačios, kaip maniškė, bet kiekvienas vis tiek privalo jas nugalėti, kad atrastų savo gyvenimo tikslą ir taptų laisvas.
**********************************************************
North Korea, experiences from there, literature read about it, seem like special, exotic animals in a zoo that you absolutely must see, hear, that all social networks write about, but they are there... somewhere behind a cage, a glass wall... A trend?... at the same time, something hidden, incomprehensible - a machine, like honey...
I would like to believe that we, those behind the wall, reading these stories, or those who share these stories, would be catalysts for a miracle that will happen, maybe... not in a year, or two, maybe in a decade.
I was reading like a history textbook, a documentary, which is quite different from "River in the Dark".
Would I understand the decisions made in the book if I were in such an environment? However, living here and now - no matter how empathetic I might be - I cannot...
THERE...no-for their own opinion, no-for critical thinking, no-for expressed feelings, no-for elementary human emotions, not-for words, not-for colors, except for black and white, no-for humanity!. All these empty vessels, when the author moved to South Korea, had to be filled, to learn to use them as if new tools.
Šiaurės Korėja, patirtys iš ten, skaitoma literatūra apie tai, atrodo tarsi šiuo metu ypatingi, egzotiški zoologijos sode esantys žvėreliai, kuriuos turi būtinai pamatyti, išgirsti, apie kuriuos rašo visi soc tinklai bet jie yra ten..kažkur už gardo, stiklo sienos..Trendas?.. tuo pačiu tai kas paslėpta, nesuprantama- masina, tarsi medus...
Taip norėtųsi tikėti, kad mes, tie- už sienos, skaitantys šias istorijas, ar tie, kurie dalinasi šiomis istorijomis, būtume katalizatoriais įvyksiančio stebuklo, gal...ne už metų, ar dviejų, gal už dešimtmečio..
Skaičiau tarsi istorijos vadovėlį, dokumentiką, kuris gerokai skiriasi nuo "Upės tamsoje".
Ar aš būdama tokioje aplinkoje suprasčiau knygoje aprašomus priimtus sprendimus? Visgi gyvenant čia ir dabar- nors ir kiek būčiau empatiška- negaliu...
TEN...ne-savo nuomonei, ne- kritiniam mąstymui, ne- reiškiamiems jausmams, ne- elementarioms žmogiškoms emocijoms, ne- žodžiui, ne-spalvoms, išskyrus juoda- balta, ne-žmogiškumui!. Visus šiuos tuščius indus, autorei persikėlus į P.Korėją, reikėjo užpildyti, išmokti naudotis tarsi naujais įrankiais.
🖋️Emocinė diktatūra. Šiaurės Korėjos valdžiai negana kontroliuoti, kur nuvykti, ką išmoksti, kur dirbo ir ką sakai. Jiems taip pat reikia kontroliuoti ir tave patį, tavo emocijas. Paversti tave valstybės vergų, sunaikinant bet kokią individualybę ir palaužiant gebėjimą reaguoti į aplinkybes, remiantis platesne pasaulio pažinimo patirtimi.
🖋️Visi išmokstame galvoti vienu protu.
🖋️mes, šiaurės korėjiečiai, sugebame nepriekaištingai meluoti-net ir patys sau..
🖋️Šiaurės Korėjoje pavasaris yra mirties sezonas.
🖋️Nusipelniau būti laikoma žmogumi, o ne medžiojamu gyvūnu.
🖋️Beveik dvejus metus gyvenau taip, tarsi visi penki mano pojūčiai būtų atbukę. Nesugebėjau jausti, užuost, matyti, išgirsti ar paragauti mane supusio pasaulio. Jei būčiau leidusi sau tuos dalykus patirtivisu jų intensyvumu, ko gero, būčiau netekusi proto.
🖋️Kai buvau maža, svajojau turėti visą kibirą duonos. Nuo šiol mano svajonės įgavo didybės (pradėjus mokytis universitete)
🖋️Visi turime savo dykumas. Galbūt jos ne tokios pačios, kaip maniškė, bet kiekvienas vis tiek privalo jas nugalėti, kad atrastų savo gyvenimo tikslą ir taptų laisvas.
**********************************************************
North Korea, experiences from there, literature read about it, seem like special, exotic animals in a zoo that you absolutely must see, hear, that all social networks write about, but they are there... somewhere behind a cage, a glass wall... A trend?... at the same time, something hidden, incomprehensible - a machine, like honey...
I would like to believe that we, those behind the wall, reading these stories, or those who share these stories, would be catalysts for a miracle that will happen, maybe... not in a year, or two, maybe in a decade.
I was reading like a history textbook, a documentary, which is quite different from "River in the Dark".
Would I understand the decisions made in the book if I were in such an environment? However, living here and now - no matter how empathetic I might be - I cannot...
THERE...no-for their own opinion, no-for critical thinking, no-for expressed feelings, no-for elementary human emotions, not-for words, not-for colors, except for black and white, no-for humanity!. All these empty vessels, when the author moved to South Korea, had to be filled, to learn to use them as if new tools.
April 14, 2023
I have no proper words to describe my feelings, love, affection and respect for this young woman…
“Impossible is Nothing,”
-Adidas.
I have lived and journeyed through my own dessert. As Yeonmi Park mentions in her book, “We all travel our own desserts, no matter where you come from. And we continue to do so with every aspect in life. Life is a journey, and I am still exploring.”
I have to say, I developed a mini crush on her strong will, beautiful mind and spirit. She is one to be recon with!
So I set a challenge for all my friends out there; “find what moves you, and never give in to scrutiny or judgement. You are your own god. Learn to live, love, learn and pursue happiness for yourself and no one else.”
No one makes it out alive, so do not just be “alive”, live life to its fullest!
Read this book, and you’ll feel you have loved another day.
“Impossible is Nothing,”
-Adidas.
I have lived and journeyed through my own dessert. As Yeonmi Park mentions in her book, “We all travel our own desserts, no matter where you come from. And we continue to do so with every aspect in life. Life is a journey, and I am still exploring.”
I have to say, I developed a mini crush on her strong will, beautiful mind and spirit. She is one to be recon with!
So I set a challenge for all my friends out there; “find what moves you, and never give in to scrutiny or judgement. You are your own god. Learn to live, love, learn and pursue happiness for yourself and no one else.”
No one makes it out alive, so do not just be “alive”, live life to its fullest!
Read this book, and you’ll feel you have loved another day.
April 11, 2018
I’ve read a few books from North Korea defectors. Most noticeably A River in Darkness: One Man's Escape from North Korea and Nothing to Envy: Ordinary Lives in North Korea, but I hadn’t really read anything from a purely female perspective until now.
Yeonmi Park grew up in North Korea, near the border with China, with her entrepreneurial father, mother and sister. Although they may not have initially had the worst upbringing due to her father’s ingenuity, this changed when he was sent to prison, leaving Yeonmi and her sister alone without food while their mother travelled for work. What follows is the now typical, and harrowing, tale of starvation and desperation to survive in a country that doesn’t care for their own outside of the elite. Yeonmi talks openly of a childhood spent searching for food and constantly living in fear that they could follow in their father’s footsteps. Desperate to survive.
Desperation turns to flight, as Yeonmi and her mother are smuggled into China, and to perhaps an even worse fate than starvation as they soon become embroiled in the trafficking and raping of North Korean women to impoverished Chinese farmers. Throughout her story, Yeonmi is honest and open about her experiences to the point where it almost feels cathartic. By sharing her story it feels like Yeonmi is expressing not only her disappointment in her home country, but also her grief and resilience to thrive. And it also gives hope to those still struggling.
The book also really highlights just how different the experience of defecting is for North Korean women compared to men. Often the men do this alone, and are exposed to harsh and violent endings. The women endure their own unique horrors that seem to revolve around this feeling of powerlessness and reliance on their captors, but often it’s alongside other women who share their plight. For Yeonmi, she had her mother.
The most surprising aspect for me were the later chapters centering around South Korea. I’d read previously of the struggles first encountered by North Koreans during their assimilation into South Korean life, however I wasn’t fully aware of the prejudices, and also the lack of understanding, that Yeonmi faces on encountering native South Koreans. This seems to be no fault on the governments side, as they provide education and money to help ease the pressures, but rather just a general ignorance to the plight of defectors. It would seem, from Yeonmi’s perspective, that they choose to bury their heads in the sand to the real suffering across their borders. I found it especially sad that Yeonmi felt the need to bury all aspects of her North Korean heritage - from her accent, to studying ‘celebrities’ just in order to fit in and be accepted.
The real sentiment I’ll take away from this however, is just how strong the familial bond can be. Yeonmi and her mother face so much adversity through their lives, and continue to look for their missing sister and daughter long after their arrival in South Korea. Their bond never waivers, and the love they have for each other is unending.
Yeonmi Park grew up in North Korea, near the border with China, with her entrepreneurial father, mother and sister. Although they may not have initially had the worst upbringing due to her father’s ingenuity, this changed when he was sent to prison, leaving Yeonmi and her sister alone without food while their mother travelled for work. What follows is the now typical, and harrowing, tale of starvation and desperation to survive in a country that doesn’t care for their own outside of the elite. Yeonmi talks openly of a childhood spent searching for food and constantly living in fear that they could follow in their father’s footsteps. Desperate to survive.
Desperation turns to flight, as Yeonmi and her mother are smuggled into China, and to perhaps an even worse fate than starvation as they soon become embroiled in the trafficking and raping of North Korean women to impoverished Chinese farmers. Throughout her story, Yeonmi is honest and open about her experiences to the point where it almost feels cathartic. By sharing her story it feels like Yeonmi is expressing not only her disappointment in her home country, but also her grief and resilience to thrive. And it also gives hope to those still struggling.
The book also really highlights just how different the experience of defecting is for North Korean women compared to men. Often the men do this alone, and are exposed to harsh and violent endings. The women endure their own unique horrors that seem to revolve around this feeling of powerlessness and reliance on their captors, but often it’s alongside other women who share their plight. For Yeonmi, she had her mother.
The most surprising aspect for me were the later chapters centering around South Korea. I’d read previously of the struggles first encountered by North Koreans during their assimilation into South Korean life, however I wasn’t fully aware of the prejudices, and also the lack of understanding, that Yeonmi faces on encountering native South Koreans. This seems to be no fault on the governments side, as they provide education and money to help ease the pressures, but rather just a general ignorance to the plight of defectors. It would seem, from Yeonmi’s perspective, that they choose to bury their heads in the sand to the real suffering across their borders. I found it especially sad that Yeonmi felt the need to bury all aspects of her North Korean heritage - from her accent, to studying ‘celebrities’ just in order to fit in and be accepted.
The real sentiment I’ll take away from this however, is just how strong the familial bond can be. Yeonmi and her mother face so much adversity through their lives, and continue to look for their missing sister and daughter long after their arrival in South Korea. Their bond never waivers, and the love they have for each other is unending.
January 8, 2019
This was such an insightful story. Both terribly horrific and beautifully inspiring.
Im not giving this book a star-rating because it feels odd to 'rate' a story that is real. I do want to recommend it to everyone who is even remotely interested. Don't be hesistant because it's non-fiction; it's very readable and approachable.
I'll be thinking about this for a long time.
Im not giving this book a star-rating because it feels odd to 'rate' a story that is real. I do want to recommend it to everyone who is even remotely interested. Don't be hesistant because it's non-fiction; it's very readable and approachable.
I'll be thinking about this for a long time.
November 11, 2018
Garbage book. Her written accounts on this book don't match with her interviews. She said she buried her father alone at 3 am yet her mom says they paid two people to help them bury the body. And her mom owned designer/imported clothes back in North Korea. I live in Japan and my own mother couldn't even afford a fucking Chanel bag (which of course her mom had by the way). Their family was considered rich in North Korean standards. HER PARENTS WERE INVOLVED IN HUMAN TRAFFICKING. Her dad was sentenced at first for smuggling metals but after getting out on a sick bail he doubled down and kidnapped some girls in their neighborhood, lured them into "getting prettier" with plastic surgery if they come with him.
Also, this girl is literally funded by Koch Brothers and Atlas Foundation a libertarian group actively trying to destabilize Venezuela with their propaganda. This pretty much discredits her all through out.
https://thediplomat.com/2014/12/the-s...
Also, this girl is literally funded by Koch Brothers and Atlas Foundation a libertarian group actively trying to destabilize Venezuela with their propaganda. This pretty much discredits her all through out.
https://thediplomat.com/2014/12/the-s...
July 11, 2018
4.5 stars
Incredible and heartbreaking story.
I wanted to write a review but honestly I don't think I'll ever be able to. In my opinion it's impossible to write criticism about a book like this.
I'm happy I read this and that I know a little bit more of what happens in the world.
Since no one ever talks about the conditions of NK I'm going to. Everyone I know will listen to me talking about this huge problem.
I had previously read Escape from Camp 14, but I needed some information about women in NK, and this book was perfect for that.
Btw don't let people fool you. Instead of helping Yeonmi and praising her for what she's doing for her country, people that have no idea about what she went through are lying telling the world that she is a fraud. And that's exactly what NK wants you to think.
Everyone that is doing this should be ashamed of himself/herself.
Watch these amazing TED talks:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdxPC...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLeeT...
Incredible and heartbreaking story.
I wanted to write a review but honestly I don't think I'll ever be able to. In my opinion it's impossible to write criticism about a book like this.
I'm happy I read this and that I know a little bit more of what happens in the world.
Since no one ever talks about the conditions of NK I'm going to. Everyone I know will listen to me talking about this huge problem.
I had previously read Escape from Camp 14, but I needed some information about women in NK, and this book was perfect for that.
Btw don't let people fool you. Instead of helping Yeonmi and praising her for what she's doing for her country, people that have no idea about what she went through are lying telling the world that she is a fraud. And that's exactly what NK wants you to think.
Everyone that is doing this should be ashamed of himself/herself.
Watch these amazing TED talks:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdxPC...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLeeT...
March 27, 2020
Es 1984 pero real, está pasando ahora mismo en Corea del Norte, y lo peor de todo es que cuando consiguen escapar del país, los "desertores" están expuestos a las mafias de trata de blancas. Es impactante porque es real, y el Mundo no parece o no quiere darse cuenta de la realidad.
De obligada lectura
De obligada lectura
February 8, 2021
Breathtaking.
April 24, 2025
This is the third North Korean defection account I've read or heard of. The first was called Danny's Story. It was a YouTube documentary that I watched at the Asia Society when the defector was the guest of a fireside chat. The second was Hyeonseo Lee's The Girl with Seven Names: A North Korean Defector's Story. Now there's this one. Commonalities: they were all so young!, all desperate, all brave, all through China, and all live and survive by grit. All three are worth listening to/reading to.
Yeonmi Park was the youngest of the three, and also the most recent. Her story is heartbreaking - of course it is. How could it not be? The sacrifices made by her parents. My mom would've done the same as what her mom did, but that's not something she ever would've had to face by virtue of her family having been below the DMZ at the time of the Korean War. So many families were separated by an arbitrary line back then, and they remain separated. By this time, people don't even know who their family might be on the other side of that line. The generations that knew are dying off.
I remember going to a summer camp in Korea in middle school. It was a government sponsored two-week cultural tour of the country. It was a lot of fun, amazing food, and lots of learning. But the day we were going to the DMZ, they wanted us to know how awful North Korea was, how brainwashed their people were, how horrid the government was. This was before the famine mentioned in this book. I resisted all of what they were saying. I was innocent, and I couldn't believe they were right. I was sure it was an ugly and unnecessary nationalism. I still think there's a large element of that, because it really sounds like the kind of thing the US government taught them to say in the name of westernized freedom and democracy. However, books like this also seem to confirm all I remember from back then.
I'm glad they got out. I'm surprised we are up to 26k defectors as of the times just before the Beijing Olympics when this book was written. While I'm the last person to perpetuate US Cold war propaganda on anyone, I do think these stories are important. I commend their courage, and I hope they continue to thrive. I'd love to read a part two maybe 30 years from now to see if they were able to stay in touch with anyone or how else they've continued on with their lives.
Update: dropping a star after reading up on her on Wikipedia. I realize Wikipedia isn't always reliable, but there's enough on there that make me wonder enough about her narrative. (Thanks to Bee for the suggestion on the Wiki page!)
Yeonmi Park was the youngest of the three, and also the most recent. Her story is heartbreaking - of course it is. How could it not be? The sacrifices made by her parents. My mom would've done the same as what her mom did, but that's not something she ever would've had to face by virtue of her family having been below the DMZ at the time of the Korean War. So many families were separated by an arbitrary line back then, and they remain separated. By this time, people don't even know who their family might be on the other side of that line. The generations that knew are dying off.
I remember going to a summer camp in Korea in middle school. It was a government sponsored two-week cultural tour of the country. It was a lot of fun, amazing food, and lots of learning. But the day we were going to the DMZ, they wanted us to know how awful North Korea was, how brainwashed their people were, how horrid the government was. This was before the famine mentioned in this book. I resisted all of what they were saying. I was innocent, and I couldn't believe they were right. I was sure it was an ugly and unnecessary nationalism. I still think there's a large element of that, because it really sounds like the kind of thing the US government taught them to say in the name of westernized freedom and democracy. However, books like this also seem to confirm all I remember from back then.
I'm glad they got out. I'm surprised we are up to 26k defectors as of the times just before the Beijing Olympics when this book was written. While I'm the last person to perpetuate US Cold war propaganda on anyone, I do think these stories are important. I commend their courage, and I hope they continue to thrive. I'd love to read a part two maybe 30 years from now to see if they were able to stay in touch with anyone or how else they've continued on with their lives.
Update: dropping a star after reading up on her on Wikipedia. I realize Wikipedia isn't always reliable, but there's enough on there that make me wonder enough about her narrative. (Thanks to Bee for the suggestion on the Wiki page!)
March 3, 2018
“I inhaled books like other people breathe oxygen. I didn't just read for knowledge or pleasure, I read to live.”
Wow. This book was incredible. What Yeonmi Park and many other North Koreans have gone through is simply horrific and inhumane. She is so brave to tell her story and shine light on this issue. I felt truly inspired listening to this book. Everything that Yeonmi Park has overcome and everything she has achieved since her escape is incredible.
I truly think everyone should read this book and will benefit from it. I believe it is so important to educate ourselves on this issue.
Wow. This book was incredible. What Yeonmi Park and many other North Koreans have gone through is simply horrific and inhumane. She is so brave to tell her story and shine light on this issue. I felt truly inspired listening to this book. Everything that Yeonmi Park has overcome and everything she has achieved since her escape is incredible.
I truly think everyone should read this book and will benefit from it. I believe it is so important to educate ourselves on this issue.
February 24, 2022
CARTEA ASTA!! Nici nu știu ce să spun despre ea. S-a citit în ritm alert, ca un thriller pe alocuri, ca ficțiune contemporană în alte locuri, și totuși... A trebuit tot timpul să-mi reamintesc că e o poveste reală. Că toate experiențele oribile prin care a trecut Yeonmi au fost reale.
Am iubit cartea asta, și am urât-o în egală măsură. Dar e o carte excepțională. De departe cea mai emoționantă și mai înfiorătoare carte de memorii pe care am parcurs-o. O recomand absolut tuturor, din toată lumea! Povestea lui Yeonmi ar trebui să vină ca un semnal de alarmă la ce s-ar putea întâmpla dacă o mână de oameni acaparează puterea și se apucă să izoleze un popor întreg de lumea exterioară. Coreea de Nord este exemplul suprem al sclaviei moderne. Doar citind povești ale unor evadați de acolo poți înțelege (și nici atunci pe deplin) cum funcționează această manipulare în masă. Absolut înfiorător... Iar să fii femeie într-o astfel de lume... Mult, mult mai rău decât să fii bărbat. De ce mă mai mir oare?...
Am iubit cartea asta, și am urât-o în egală măsură. Dar e o carte excepțională. De departe cea mai emoționantă și mai înfiorătoare carte de memorii pe care am parcurs-o. O recomand absolut tuturor, din toată lumea! Povestea lui Yeonmi ar trebui să vină ca un semnal de alarmă la ce s-ar putea întâmpla dacă o mână de oameni acaparează puterea și se apucă să izoleze un popor întreg de lumea exterioară. Coreea de Nord este exemplul suprem al sclaviei moderne. Doar citind povești ale unor evadați de acolo poți înțelege (și nici atunci pe deplin) cum funcționează această manipulare în masă. Absolut înfiorător... Iar să fii femeie într-o astfel de lume... Mult, mult mai rău decât să fii bărbat. De ce mă mai mir oare?...
August 7, 2017
Ich weiß, dass es viel Kritik an Yeonmi Park gibt und an der Glaubwürdigkeit ihrer Geschichte. Ich kenne diese Vorwürfe, und tue sie auch nicht als Quatsch ab, sondern denke, dass da definitiv etwas dran ist.
ABER das Buch selbst ist wirklich sehr gelungen. Es ist sehr ergreifend, größtenteils extrem schockierend(vor allem weil ich dachte, dass ich über Nordkorea schon viel weiß) und spannend. Eine Biographie, die man gelesen haben sollte, die aufklärt und meinen Blick auf die Welt nochmal ein bisschen geschärft hat.
ABER das Buch selbst ist wirklich sehr gelungen. Es ist sehr ergreifend, größtenteils extrem schockierend(vor allem weil ich dachte, dass ich über Nordkorea schon viel weiß) und spannend. Eine Biographie, die man gelesen haben sollte, die aufklärt und meinen Blick auf die Welt nochmal ein bisschen geschärft hat.
February 10, 2017
I read this book for the Goodreads book club Diversity in All Forms. Join the discussion: https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
I am very glad we read this book because North Korea is a country I know very little about. This book was super eye opening. I also had never heard of the human trafficking in China, especially the trafficking of North Koreans.
Books like these are the reason I read. I love having my eyes and world open. They motivate me to make a difference and a change, even if I can only contribute in small ways. I'm a Special Education Teacher that teaches high schoolers with cognitive/intellectual disabilities and I started a book club about diversity. Both of these things are small but they help me feel like I'm making even a small difference.
This book also reconfirms why we need to treat immigrants and refugees with respect, help and understanding. As citizens l, of any country, we need to welcome others and help them adjust. They have been through so much and need us.
I suggest this book to everyone!!!
I am very glad we read this book because North Korea is a country I know very little about. This book was super eye opening. I also had never heard of the human trafficking in China, especially the trafficking of North Koreans.
Books like these are the reason I read. I love having my eyes and world open. They motivate me to make a difference and a change, even if I can only contribute in small ways. I'm a Special Education Teacher that teaches high schoolers with cognitive/intellectual disabilities and I started a book club about diversity. Both of these things are small but they help me feel like I'm making even a small difference.
This book also reconfirms why we need to treat immigrants and refugees with respect, help and understanding. As citizens l, of any country, we need to welcome others and help them adjust. They have been through so much and need us.
I suggest this book to everyone!!!
October 30, 2016
I'll have a review of this up next week!
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