Love, Death and Tea

Love and Death #1

by Will Once

A comic novel about love, courage and revolution at the end of the world.

Just what do you do when the apocalypse happens ... and you end up as a zombie and not one of the lantern-jawed heroes?

Genres: Zombies, Fantasy, Humor, Fiction, Paranormal

273 pages, Kindle Edition

First published June 14, 2013

About the author

Laughter in a crazy world...

Life is too short for bad wine, a home without love or a world without humour.

Back in the twenty teens, I tried my hand at this novel writing thing. I had a great time, met some lovely people and scratched a major issue.

Now I have reached the tender age of 60. I have retired from the UK civil service and have lots of free time. So I'm getting back into the writing - 12 years since I started.

More to follow

Reviews

[Erin *Proud Book Hoarder* · Rating 5 out of 5]

The vampires get the cool powers, the living get the guns and the zombies just get the munchies."

A hilarious tribute for those who love monsters.

You have zombies, vampires, werewolves, dragons, witches, and a large assortment of just about everything in Love, Death and Tea. You even have "tea".

Led through the point of view of an unfortunate young man who always gets life's short end of the stick, his luck doesn't improve when a magical wave hits the world and turns him into a zombie. His girlfriend may get the cool power of being a witch who can brew up tea to help him from becoming mindless and slavering, but it seems pretty much all of his other loved ones and friends end up with cooler powers. I won't spoil it about some of them - the scene with his father had me literally laughing aloud - because it's better to discover that for yourself.

Through the fun journey they go on as a group, they run into new monsters, foes, government battles, strange towns....all of this may sound a little silly, but trust me when I say that it works. Embracing the stereotype was a winning technique here. It sounds like a simple story and in a way it is, but there were several surprises around the corner on what disaster could befall our main characters next.

The best way to get a bit of poetry in your soul is to eat a librarian.

The writing style was a delight, effortlessly putting humor in the text without seeming forced. Definitely pick this one up when you get the chance. It's definitely not a traditional zombie story. Really it's not a horror story, despite the monsters, but a humor fantasy that horror and non-horror fans alike should read.

[David Staniforth · Rating 4 out of 5]

A delightful and entertaining, silly read. Not the kind of thing that would normally appeal to me, but having read and enjoyed the author's blog many times, I knew I'd likely enjoy this. Will Once has a definite style, which crosses over from the blog to this book and another of his that I also read and enjoyed, Global Domination for Beginners. I love exploring language, and it's obvious that Mr Once does too, with his many humorous looks at language usage. That same humour delves into everyday life, and put me in mind of bloke banter at work or in the pub, sometimes making me groan but often making me chuckle.

Favourite line: “The best way to get a bit of poetry in your soul is to eat a librarian;” Though I can say it's not true, most of the librarians I know rarely read.

[Chip · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a very fun read. I'm not hugely into zombie books (most of them just seem to be gruesome for the sake of being gruesome). However, I really enjoy a good book told from the point of the view of the "bad guy."

I was introduced to Will Once through his book Global Domination for Beginners which really hit one of my favorite niches of "Sympathy for the person attempting Global domination." I'm not sure what it says about my psyche that I reallly enjoy those books, but since I enjoy that genre and I've already read another book by this author AND this book is a zombie book told from the point of view OF THE ZOMBIE, I decided to give this book a whirl.

Let me tell you; I think Wil has found his niche. I've already bought his book Hero and loaded it onto my kindle.

The wry humor and the straight send ups of the stereotypes of the genre are what really set this book apart. I'm not going to type a long review of this book, but I will say that if you enjoy zombies, dragons, witches, ghosts, and a good popcorn read of a book, read this now.

[Evelina | AvalinahsBooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm not sure where I got this book. Maybe it was a freebie? Just in case it's an old forgotten review copy, I'll leave a review. If it is that case, disclaimer: the books provenance did not affect my opinion. At the time of this review, it was free on the author's website for an email newsletter sub, so if you're interested, you can grab it too.

Anyway, what an odd story! I take it this is a parody of zombie/vampire/any other kind of dystopias/fantasy, as it was popular about the time it was written. Maybe it's even parodying RPG games a little bit? It's really light-hearted and full of black humor. The characters are not taking themselves seriously, and it's kind of funny to read. From how the characters come up, I feel that the author was indeed taking the piss out of the many similar fantasy dystopias at the time. Especially with how the world was manipulated - how the laws of physics change to set up the story and the characters just accept it. This is a common trick in books like that, which made me chuckle. And despite all that - the story had its serious moments, which, despite the lighthearted and playful style of the story, did seem to belong and move you as they were supposed to. The more I read this book, the more I enjoyed it.

So this story was definitely weird, but I have to say, I was very entertained, and I don't even normally like parodies. This book, while totally a pisstake at these kinds of stories, managed to actually involve you on its own, and be engrossing despite using half of the same bad tropes the stories it was parodying would use. I'm not even sure how the author pulled that off! It was a silly and fun read. Definitely a few evenings well spent.

Also, funny story. The book joked on how the main character would rather prefer catatonia to Dame Shirley Bassey, and that's how I discovered her amazing music. I find that just as hilarious as the book, and I'm happy to disagree with the main character's taste in music 😂

[Bandit · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is about as light as apocalypse comes. Or not even apocalypse really, not the end of the world per se, more like a change or a switch. Actually Switch, occurs suddenly and turns unsuspecting (as they tend to be) citizens into various mythological and storybook characters. Accordingly the hero of this book becomes a zombie, his girlfriend turns into a witch, his dad into a vampire and so on. And then of course they all embark on an epic quest. This is a cute book or, since it's British, let's say cheeky. Particularly so as it is narrated by a sentient zombie, whose sentience is maintained, since he's British, by a special sort of tea. There is a lot of tea drinking in the book. Occasionally the book slips into utter silliness, but for the most part it maintains the aforementioned cheekiness and from time to time even shows some charm and wit. What it needs desperately is a different cover and a different name, because currently both of those suggest something much cheesier and estrogenier. Fun and sometimes funny quick read, perfectly enjoyable way to spend a few hours. Thanks to my friend Erin for this suggestion and a loan. I'm glad I didn't have to judge this one by the cover. The best thing about this book, my favorite mental image is that of two zombies having some tea, occasionally farting and nodding to each other. It's a zombie thing, apparently.

[Olivia · Rating 3.75 out of 5]

I grabbed this today for my kindle and since I'm recovering from food poisoning figured I may as well read it straight away. It's a clever story, told from the point of view of a freshly turned zombie, who got bitten at a supermarket (Tescos) checkout. Oh and his girlfriend turned into a witch.
There's also dragons, vampires, ghosts and there's the Switch Day that started it all: the day all electricity and batteries failed to work and people suddenly weren't themselves anymore.
A lovely bunch of likeable characters, a special kind of road trip, amusing writing, a bit silly, yet serious. I thoroughly enjoyed myself.

[H.M. Ada · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a funny, light, entertaining read that pokes fun at the post-apocalyptic and fantasy genres with plenty of British wit and sarcasm along the way.

Love, Death and Tea starts out with a really interesting concept - the Switch. That is, one day, everything we know about the world suddenly changes. Cars don't work, books change their contents, and ordinary people turn into fantasy characters and creatures. I really liked this setup and found it pretty unique among post-apocalyptic books.

Then the main characters go on a journey type quest, whose purpose remains a mystery until the end. I won't say too much else because I don't like spoilers, but much of the book focus on the main character's internal struggle with being a zombie, in addition to all of the main characters' struggle with the villains (both fantasy and human). Along the way, there is a lot of reference, parody, and satire to zombie stories and almost every kind of fantasy story you could think of. The jokes are clever and they keep coming throughout.

I would've liked a little more development of some of the supporting characters, especially the main character's girlfriend. They were pretty cool, and I would've like a bit more backstory, dialogue, and action from them. I also would've liked a little more explanation at the end regarding what caused The Switch, but the ending here did have a few interesting twists and was exciting.

So, overall, this was an entertaining read and worth the time.

[Rob Gregson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this was ridiculously good. The story is entertaining and the characters immediately likeable, but it was the wry humour and the sly observations about modern day life that really made it stand out for me.

It almost surprises me that not every reviewer has given it a straight five stars but I think this must be a 'wavelength' thing. Personally, I felt that I just 'got it' from the first page - pretty much every phrase made me smile and the tone of the narrative made the whole thing feel effortless and great fun. If you share a love of language, invention and tongue-in-cheek comedy than I can't believe you won't love this.

[Joo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Patti told me to try this book. I'd not noticed this author, but as soon as I read the blurb, I had to try it. And I'm so glad I listened to Patti.

I've recently been reading a lot of zombie / plague stories. I've not read one from a pacifist zombie point of view before.

This book was a delight to read. It's hard to explain the plot, but everything, no matter how silly it might have been, just slotted into place and was believable in its surreality.

[Corben · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love, Death and Tea demonstrates just how good a self-published novel can be. It really is a high quality piece of work. Extremely well written and edited. It’s the story of a very British zombie and follows his journey from Estate Agent to national Hero. And, for me, that journey is packed full of great comedy that delights in taking the Mickey out of British culture. The humour maintains the same high level from beginning to end.

[Kevin Marsh · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a really interesting book, such an amusing style of writing which kept me turning the pages.
I found the characters a lovable bunch and I really felt as if I was living their lives with them.
This was a completely different style of book for me, I generally read historical/fiction, but I'm glad I discovered Will Once. I will definitely read more of his books.

[D. Thrush · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a clever take on dystopian novels. When the Switch happens, our hero becomes a zombie. His girlfriend becomes a witch and his father becomes a vampire. The government is taken over by someone who wants to eliminate them all, so what can they do? They go on a quest for someone named POD who supposedly can help them. This is a light, quirky, amusing read.

[Zaz · Rating 4 out of 5]

An entertaining zombie-fantasy story with some clever ideas. Add some humour on the top and a main character dead but not dead, and you'll have something tasty, easy to read, without having to use too much of your brain. A good summary could be: "I'm glad I won this giveaway, please write more books".

One day, the apocalypse arrives. It's not really an apocalypse in fact, but more a change affecting the world and the living things. I've to say I was curious about all the zombie, witch and vampire stuff because I wasn't sure you can write something consistent with it. In fact, it works well and each member of the team adds his personnality to the story, even the cat. If the human part was interesting enough, I totally felt in love with how the world changed. This was a clever idea, I totally want that if an apocalypse happens one day.

I usually enjoy stories using a different point of view, so one told by a zombie was nice. There were enough touches of humour and some neat references, so the chuckles were here and the pleasant surprises too. The story was a quest to find someone, a good way to travel a little in the United Kingdom and to meet some disturbing humans and supernaturel creatures. Some passages were a bit gory (it's a story told by a zombie, what can you expect?), there were smelling huggs, lots of teas and bad zombie humour. Everything is nicely built (with more originality in the 1st half), so it was a pleasant reading from the beginning to the end.

[Philip · Rating 4 out of 5]

Will Once is a fellow GoodReads author and on my friends list and we have discussed the etiquette of writing reviews of each others work, but I have read this book, I paid for it on Kindle not as a review copy and therefore I think I am as entitled to review as any one else. Disclaimer over what did I think...

First up I'm not normally a fan of zombie, witch, vampire etc fiction. There are notable exceptions and this book has added to it. It's a wry comedy which makes it a cut above the usual horror versions of these tales, what little horror there is is cartoon-ish. There are lots of word games and clever references to Lord of The Rings, amongst others. For the non-Uk reader it may be a little harder to follow all the in-jokes. It is not laugh out loud at least not for me but I did have a smile on my face for the whole story.

I don't like spoilers but the setting after all electricity disappears was great fun and the zombie first person viewpoint was cleverly executed.

I would give it 4.5 stars and recommend to any reader that likes a witty tale. Well done Will and I look forward to the next read.

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Will Once creates a fantastical and original zombie story with his novel, Love, Death and Tea. Once takes the typical zombie story and turns it on its head by creating a thinking and compassionate zombie in a world suddenly changed by the "switch." We are now introduced to our main protagonists: a compassionate zombie, his girlfriend the blossoming witch, and the zombie's vampire father. By adding all of these characters, and more, you are left with an adventurous and hilarious apocalyptic story.
Love, Death and Tea is a must read for any zombie fan looking for a change of pace. Will Once took a leap of faith and created something magnificent out of what could have been another mundane zombie novel.
How on Earth could you not want to read a book with zombies, witches, werewolves, dwarves, and ghouls?? Will Once has created a masterpiece with this novel and it is one you can easily read, with Once's smooth and easygoing writing style, and enjoy more than once.
Give this novel a read and have a good laugh, while also enjoying some breathtaking adventures and crazy encounters.

http://novelideareviews.blogspot.com/...

[Becky · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is not just another zombie book, and I read a LOT of zombie books. Not only are there zombies, there are witches, ghosts, vampires, a dragon -- all manner of supernatural creatures.

What surprised me the most was the warm and fuzzy feeling I got when I finished the novel, which is very rare for this genre. The book is written first person, so that means he can't die, right? He's already a zombie, which means he's dead, so he can't die, right?! Well, maybe...that is all explained and done in a way that kept me smiling, occasionally laughing, and really afraid for his well being and how/if it would end for him. I loved this character!

I have also read "Global Domination for Beginners" by the same author. It was a quality read, too (I gave it 4 stars) but I felt the momentum in "Love, Death and Tea" maintained the strong pace exceptionally well. So if you like this novel, you should definitely check out Global Domination...

And if I may say so, I really like the black and white cover best for Love, Death and Tea. I feel it's more representative and better fits the tone of the novel. My humble opinion.

[Briar Rose · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was wonderful, and that's not a word I use lightly. It was quick, compelling, and so funny that I am pretty sure I woke up my housemates with some late-night laughing. I kept texting quotes to my sister, and now she wants to read it too.

Love, Death, and Tea offers a humorous, irreverent look at zombies and the apocalypse, with a different flavor from anything else I've read. If you're looking for deep, complex, twisty plotting and a huge cast of characters, look elsewhere: this book is light with crisp pacing, but the characters it does have are deftly-drawn. During a difficult time, it was exactly the light-hearted escape I needed.

[Camilla Hansen · Rating 2 out of 5]

I like silly books, but when it's over the top and trying to be clever all the time, and not always succeeding, it just becomes a bit much, honestly.

You start nit picking the silly bits instead of enjoying them.

Also, the tone of the narrator, the way his worldview is reflected in his narration. Well. Let's just say he isn't a compelling narrator for me to see the story through. Not that Libby would be much better for me. Someone more in the middle might have worked better for me personally.

I see the ideas and again, personally, I'm not sure if they strongly appeal to me. Perhaps the book was just never my cup of tea.

[The Angry Lawn Gnome · Rating 4 out of 5]

In terms of sheer entertainment, I think this is the best book I've read thus far in 2014. Zombies, vampires, dwarves, elves, set in a UK where the laws of physics have changed (think Ariel) told from the perspective of a rather bemused Realtor-in-Training who has just been Zombified (think the Dan Shamble series, at least back when that one was good).

[Kelly Rickard · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love death and tea

Engaging, enjoyable and a wonderful read

A zombie story with a twist as in other nightmarish creatures but without the nightmare scares this is actually very clever and funny.

Lots of fantasy but realistic sort of like Sir Terry in that humorous witty way.

Anyway this story is enjoyable and I am looking forward to reading all of Will's books and just hope he continues to write

[Allison · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book delightful. A tongue in cheek post apocalyptic tale written in the Queen’s English and full of dry British humour. Told in the first person by a narrator who admits he was less than bright before things fell apart. Filled with delightful literary references, I found myself chuckling quite often. In addition to being a fun read, there was an underlying concept that made me think.

[Kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was hilarious. I wasn't sure what the book was about, based on the title and the cover. It turns out it is a British spoof on the whole zombie apocalypse genre, with witches, werewolves, vampires, dwarfs, dragons and ghosts thrown in for good measure. I don't think I've ever read a story quite like it. I highly recommend it to anyone who likes a good laugh.

[Theresa · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the craziest zombie book I have ever read! It is hilarious! Must read for anyone who wants to get some good chuckles. A little hard to get started but commit to make it to 25% before you give up on it.

[Adeline · Rating 5 out of 5]

HILARIOUS AND WELL-WRITTEN ! one of my favourite books of all time ! Fast-paced and light, it is like any of the zombie books you might have read.