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Clean
High school senior Lanny Keating has it all. A three-sport athlete at Lauserville High School looking at a college football scholarship, with a supportive family, stellar grades, boy band good looks… until the fateful day when it all falls apart.
Seventeen-year-old Trevor Ladd has always been a publicly declared zero and the high school badboy. Abandoned by his mother and sexually abused by his legal guardian, Trevor sets his sights on mere survival.
Lanny seeks out Trevor’s companionship to avoid his shattered home life. Unwilling to share their personal experiences of pain, the boys explore ways to escape, leading them into sexual experimentation, and the abuse of illegal drugs and alcohol. Their mutual suffering creates a lasting bond of friendship and love.
When the time finally comes to get clean and sober, or flunk out of high school, only one of the boys will graduate, while the other spirals downward into addiction.
Will Lanny and Trevor find the strength to battle their demons of mind-altering substances as well as emotional vulnerability?
Clean takes the reader on a gritty trip into the real and raw world of teenage substance abuse.
Seventeen-year-old Trevor Ladd has always been a publicly declared zero and the high school badboy. Abandoned by his mother and sexually abused by his legal guardian, Trevor sets his sights on mere survival.
Lanny seeks out Trevor’s companionship to avoid his shattered home life. Unwilling to share their personal experiences of pain, the boys explore ways to escape, leading them into sexual experimentation, and the abuse of illegal drugs and alcohol. Their mutual suffering creates a lasting bond of friendship and love.
When the time finally comes to get clean and sober, or flunk out of high school, only one of the boys will graduate, while the other spirals downward into addiction.
Will Lanny and Trevor find the strength to battle their demons of mind-altering substances as well as emotional vulnerability?
Clean takes the reader on a gritty trip into the real and raw world of teenage substance abuse.
242 pages, Kindle Edition
First published December 1, 2015
4 people are currently reading
330 people want to read
About the author
Mia Kerick
42 books539 followersMia Kerick is the mother of four exceptional children—one in law school, another at a dance conservatory, a third studying at Mia’s alma mater, Boston College, and her lone son still in high school. She has published more than twenty books of LGBTQ romance when not editing National Honor Society essays, offering opinions on college and law school applications, helping to create dance bios, and reviewing English papers. Her husband of twenty-five years has been told by many that he has the patience of Job, but don’t ask Mia about this, as it is a sensitive subject.
Mia focuses her stories on the emotional growth of troubled young people and their relationships. She has a great affinity for the tortured hero in literature, and as a teen, Mia filled spiral-bound notebooks with tales of tortured heroes and stuffed them under her mattress for safekeeping. She is thankful to her wonderful publishing houses for providing her with an alternate place to stash her stories.
Her books have been featured in Kirkus Reviews magazine, and have won Rainbow Awards for Best Transgender Contemporary Romance and Best YA Lesbian Fiction, a Reader Views’ Book by Book Publicity Literary Award, the Jack Eadon Award for Best Book in Contemporary Drama, an Indie Fab Award, and a Royal Dragonfly Award for Cultural Diversity, among other awards.
Mia Kerick is a social liberal and cheers for each and every victory made in the name of human rights. Her only major regret: never having taken typing or computer class in school, destining her to a life consumed with two-fingered pecking and constant prayer to the Gods of Technology. Contact Mia at miakerick@gmail.com or visit at www.miakerickya.com to see what is going on in Mia’s world.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 59 reviews
February 2, 2016
4.25 stars
The first half of this story was heartbreaking.
Trevor is just getting by. He's using alcohol, drugs and Lanny, when he comes along, to help him forget about the abuse he suffers daily from his legal guardian. Lanny was once the golden boy, on his way to an athletic scholarship. Everything changes the day his sister is badly injured in an accident. His family falls apart under the grief and Lanny seeks solace in Trevor, the alcohol and the drugs.
Soon Lanny's dreams start to fall through his fingers. Soon his need for the high replaces his need even to be with Trevor. He fully falls into addiction. Trevor, meanwhile, sees graduation as his only way out of his crappy life and starts to turn his life around one small step at a time.
While the first half was heartbreaking, the second is hopeful. It's about recovering from addiction, re-building, helping each other and, for Trevor, finding a way to move past the abuse. Although Trevor and Lanny were physically together in the first half, they were really just using each other. In the second half they're more ready for each other and for love.
I really enjoyed the writing style - duel first person POV with very distinctive voices for Trevor and Lanny. Reading it from their perspective made me understand more clearly why people end up in this sort of downward spiral. I also liked the unique structure of this story - the first half collapsing and the second half re-building. it's nice to read something just a little bit different than anything else out there.
This had a fairly strong HFN ending but I would love to see a sequel with a true HEA. What I would love most is to have a sequel that doesn't put Lanny and Trevor through the wringer again. There's nothing wrong with low angst Ms Kerick!
The first half of this story was heartbreaking.
Trevor is just getting by. He's using alcohol, drugs and Lanny, when he comes along, to help him forget about the abuse he suffers daily from his legal guardian. Lanny was once the golden boy, on his way to an athletic scholarship. Everything changes the day his sister is badly injured in an accident. His family falls apart under the grief and Lanny seeks solace in Trevor, the alcohol and the drugs.
Soon Lanny's dreams start to fall through his fingers. Soon his need for the high replaces his need even to be with Trevor. He fully falls into addiction. Trevor, meanwhile, sees graduation as his only way out of his crappy life and starts to turn his life around one small step at a time.
While the first half was heartbreaking, the second is hopeful. It's about recovering from addiction, re-building, helping each other and, for Trevor, finding a way to move past the abuse. Although Trevor and Lanny were physically together in the first half, they were really just using each other. In the second half they're more ready for each other and for love.
I really enjoyed the writing style - duel first person POV with very distinctive voices for Trevor and Lanny. Reading it from their perspective made me understand more clearly why people end up in this sort of downward spiral. I also liked the unique structure of this story - the first half collapsing and the second half re-building. it's nice to read something just a little bit different than anything else out there.
This had a fairly strong HFN ending but I would love to see a sequel with a true HEA. What I would love most is to have a sequel that doesn't put Lanny and Trevor through the wringer again. There's nothing wrong with low angst Ms Kerick!
October 10, 2015
Clean by Mia Kerick is a gritty story of teenage substance abuse. Trevor and Lanny are both living their own private hells and seek solace by experimenting with drugs and sexual release.
I have to admit I had a hard time with the first half of this book. Not because the writing was bad, but because it was just so freakin' sad. As someone who hated going home as a kid and making bad decisions in my late teens/early twenties- I found this book incredibly difficult to read at times. Reading their decline and hopelessness just made my heart hurt. I almost took a break to read a fluffy story and then come back to it. I couldn't do it, though- I had to see their story through. Luckily this book a hopeful turn at just past the 60% mark.
At that point, their healing begins to take place. I love how Mia Kerick took her time through this part of the story- it needed to not be rushed and thankfully it wasn’t. We really get a sense of self growth and their healing felt real. I could tell there was research done when it came to the steps done in rehab. I also felt that it was well done that Trevor and Lanny didn’t
As far as sexual content, there is some but it’s not heavy with it. There is one scene towards the end that is more explicit but I felt it was appropriate for the story.
Overall, this was a 4.5 Star read for me and I definitely recommend it. It out me through the ringer- I felt it all. I was angry, frustrated, sad, but at the end I was filled with hope.
**ARC kindly provided by Mia Kerick for an honest review
**This review has been cross-posted at Gay Book Reviews:
http://gaybook.reviews/2015/10/10/cle...
December 6, 2015
This is the first book I've read by this author and what a way to start. I was bowled over by the realness of this story.
If your looking for a romantic sweet read then I suggest you skip this book.
This is the raw and gritty story of two teenagers Lanny and Trevor. Due to an accident Lannys home life is messed up. He feels so alone at home and at school. Trevor has been abandoned by his mom and is abused by his legal guardian. They both end up together meddling and trying alcohol and drugs. This leads them both to self destruct. While one gets professional help the other struggles on.
Can they move on and help each other to heal?
The first half of the book is pretty gritty. We hear of what's going on in both their lives. The second half is about healing and forgiveness. I thought the author did a great job with this story as its not an easy subject to write about.
As a mum I'd love for my kids to read this book. I think teenagers would learn so much from it. As I read this I felt the emotions as part of the story was real to me.
I'll certainly be reading more of this authors books. Great read.
If your looking for a romantic sweet read then I suggest you skip this book.
This is the raw and gritty story of two teenagers Lanny and Trevor. Due to an accident Lannys home life is messed up. He feels so alone at home and at school. Trevor has been abandoned by his mom and is abused by his legal guardian. They both end up together meddling and trying alcohol and drugs. This leads them both to self destruct. While one gets professional help the other struggles on.
Can they move on and help each other to heal?
The first half of the book is pretty gritty. We hear of what's going on in both their lives. The second half is about healing and forgiveness. I thought the author did a great job with this story as its not an easy subject to write about.
As a mum I'd love for my kids to read this book. I think teenagers would learn so much from it. As I read this I felt the emotions as part of the story was real to me.
I'll certainly be reading more of this authors books. Great read.
December 8, 2015
Clean is a powerful book. If you are looking for a happy-go-lucky romance, this probably isn't going to satisfy that need. If you are looking for a book about an issue we all should be concerned with, this is that book. This is a story about two high school age young men, Lanny and Trevor, and how they are both affected by the use, abuse, and subsequent addiction to alcohol and drugs. This story is told from alternating view points and allows the reader to get into the head of someone who starts out using alcohol as a way to escape and ends up requiring the daily use of substances in order to function. Mia does a great job of not only showing us what the individual is going through while using, but she takes us deeper through recovery and family involvement. Ultimately this is a journey that Lanny and Trevor take you on and it is realistic and thought provoking. Never fear though, we get some romance and it ties the story together perfectly!
Author Mia Kerrick is known for writing stories that are based on subjects other authors may avoid, Clean is the latest book of hers and it deals with a topic that is out of control, an issue that is facing epidemic proportions throughout the world and that is substance abuse including alcohol and drug use among teenagers and young adults. Let me be clear, although Mia's book is aimed at this age group..the issue of addiction and abuse is one that involves people from all age groups, all walks of life, all education levels..it is not an issue that is selective in who is involved..addiction will take anyone. I think Mia does an excellent job showing how easily it is to go from "just wanting an escape for a day" to "needing and requiring the daily use of a substance to function" and it is never the same for two people. Personally, as a Registered Nurse and as a Mom..I think all high school students would benefit from reading this book.
I really don't want to say to much about the story itself, because I don't want to ruin it for anyone..I think this is something everyone should experience. Overall, I give Clean 5 stars!!
ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review. Reviewed by JLoves2read for Alpha Book Club and Gay Book Reviews.
Author Mia Kerrick is known for writing stories that are based on subjects other authors may avoid, Clean is the latest book of hers and it deals with a topic that is out of control, an issue that is facing epidemic proportions throughout the world and that is substance abuse including alcohol and drug use among teenagers and young adults. Let me be clear, although Mia's book is aimed at this age group..the issue of addiction and abuse is one that involves people from all age groups, all walks of life, all education levels..it is not an issue that is selective in who is involved..addiction will take anyone. I think Mia does an excellent job showing how easily it is to go from "just wanting an escape for a day" to "needing and requiring the daily use of a substance to function" and it is never the same for two people. Personally, as a Registered Nurse and as a Mom..I think all high school students would benefit from reading this book.
I really don't want to say to much about the story itself, because I don't want to ruin it for anyone..I think this is something everyone should experience. Overall, I give Clean 5 stars!!
ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review. Reviewed by JLoves2read for Alpha Book Club and Gay Book Reviews.
March 6, 2016
This is perhaps a bit explicit for true YA; it is also about intense subjects including sexual abuse and addiction, on page. So despite the age of the protagonists, I would recommend it only with caution to older teens.
Lanny Keating had a great life and a good family, until the day his little sister was brain-injured in an accident. Since then, Lanny has been dealing with both his own guilt, and the degree to which her care has absorbed and overwhelmed his parents and him, until he seems to barely exist as a shadow around the edges of the life he once had.
Trying to escape his pain and loss, guilty over feeling selfish when his sister is the one suffering, unable to talk to anyone about what he needs, Lanny turns to alcohol, to sex, and to drugs. Anything to make the hurt go away for a while. And his pipeline to all of those is Trevor, a guy he'd have passed over in his previous shiny jock life, but now his gateway drug to oblivion.
Trevor has both admired and envied Lanny. He isn't sure why a gorgeous guy who seems to have everything is changing, willing to run off to a little shed with him and drink, and screw around. Trevor's home life is anything but pretty, and his time with Lanny is both solace and a way to remind himself that he is still in some kind of control. But alcohol isn't enough, and as much as he craves sex with Lanny, going very far feels too invasive. Trevor has limits, carved from the wreck of his daily life. But as drugs hit the scene, and Lanny spirals deeper into addiction, Trevor's ability to control anything begins to vanish.
This is a dark, painful story about bad choices, about the inability to communicate, about young men failed by all the adults in their lives. It's also, at the end, a story about redeeming your bad choices. The resolution is hopeful, almost too much so given all that was thrown at these two guys from the start, but it does pull the story up into the light.
Lanny Keating had a great life and a good family, until the day his little sister was brain-injured in an accident. Since then, Lanny has been dealing with both his own guilt, and the degree to which her care has absorbed and overwhelmed his parents and him, until he seems to barely exist as a shadow around the edges of the life he once had.
Trying to escape his pain and loss, guilty over feeling selfish when his sister is the one suffering, unable to talk to anyone about what he needs, Lanny turns to alcohol, to sex, and to drugs. Anything to make the hurt go away for a while. And his pipeline to all of those is Trevor, a guy he'd have passed over in his previous shiny jock life, but now his gateway drug to oblivion.
Trevor has both admired and envied Lanny. He isn't sure why a gorgeous guy who seems to have everything is changing, willing to run off to a little shed with him and drink, and screw around. Trevor's home life is anything but pretty, and his time with Lanny is both solace and a way to remind himself that he is still in some kind of control. But alcohol isn't enough, and as much as he craves sex with Lanny, going very far feels too invasive. Trevor has limits, carved from the wreck of his daily life. But as drugs hit the scene, and Lanny spirals deeper into addiction, Trevor's ability to control anything begins to vanish.
This is a dark, painful story about bad choices, about the inability to communicate, about young men failed by all the adults in their lives. It's also, at the end, a story about redeeming your bad choices. The resolution is hopeful, almost too much so given all that was thrown at these two guys from the start, but it does pull the story up into the light.
December 3, 2015
This book is a very tough read, not because it's written poorly, but because it portrays unflinching stories of sexual abuse, neglect and substance abuse in teens.
Landon was a great student and star athlete with everything going for him until his young sister was hit by a car. She survived, but with severe handicaps, and Lanny's family has become all about Joelle and her care. His overwhelmed and overwrought parents are angry and hostile, and don't even bother to acknowledge Lanny most days. Lanny and his parents share guilt and blame for the tragedy of Joelle's accident, and Lanny takes it super hard. He turns to alcohol to hide his pain, and he gets his alcohol from the school bad-boy, Trevor.
Trevor is a burn out. He lives each day in fear, and resignation, of the continuing sexual abuse he's endured since he was twelve and his mother abandoned him with her friend, Carl. When he can, Trevor seeks oblivion via alcohol and pot. And Lanny, the angel-faced "clean" boy that sometimes lurks in Carl's gardening shed with him. When they are drunk, it's easy to seek other releases, and Trevor's easily able to direct some impersonal (non-penetrative) sex between them.
Lanny feels like Trevor's the only person in his life who sees him. Trevor's too afraid to love anyone, and doesn't believe he's worthy of love, in any case. That said, he sees how far Lanny is slipping--he's been kicked off the football team, he's failing classes and he spends every night getting bombed. Soon they move on to pills, supplied by a mutual friend. Trevor knows his only way out of Carl's lecherous grasp is death, or cleaning up and graduating high school. He tries to get Lanny to clean out, too, but Lanny's not having it.
Expect things to get worse. Expect there to be real terror on the pages, especially for Trevor when he discovers just how far gone Lanny is.
This story is a story of redemption. It is an honest and harrowing tale of hitting rock bottom, and surviving. The first half is the descent, and the second half is the rise, and it's not an easy road on either side. Yet, it was told brilliantly, with Lanny rediscovering himself, and his family becoming a strong and supportive unit again. Lanny does what Trevor can't--forgive himself. And his recovery is well-defined in the general Twelve Step way. This may be a YA tale, but the truth of it applies to people at all ages and stages.
It is also an M/M tale--a dash of romance. Lanny is definitely attracted to Trevor, and acknowledges that he is gay. Trevor was not sure of his orientation--he's not attracted to Carl in the least--but he does acknowledge that he's attracted to Lanny, and feels the most love for him that he has of any of the few people who've been in his life. There is some sexuality on the page--most consensual, some abuse. Both are told honestly and without glorification.
Part of Lanny's recovery is making amends for his use and abuse of Trevor, who is dumbstruck that Lanny feels any need to apologize. Trevor's been mired in guilt over ever giving Lanny any substances to abuse in the first place. Lanny's steadfast determination to be a real friend to Trevor, not an escape, allows both boys to come to terms with the ills of their past. I adored how very healthy all of this was, and how it engendered a real and beneficial relationship.
At no point did I feel there was any shortcut or glossing over of the tragedy and healing in this story. I think the writing was excellent, if unconventional. Trevor's POV pages are especially fraught with his fragmented internal narrative. He's contrary and cagey, and always looking to defend himself and his emotions by denying them. He's honest with Lanny about being a liar--having hidden so much of himself, never believing that anyone could (or would) want to help him--that he is dirty, filthy, unlovable and unwholesome because of his abuse. It made for a very poignant counterpoint to Lanny's squeaky-clean, but detached family.
I always struggle to read books that feature abuse of a minor, because I'm a mom, and I hate that this happens IRL. Reading is my escape from MY everyday problems, in many cases, so I prefer the lighter fare. That said, an intense read like CLEAN serves a very important purpose in highlighting the experiences of people who are very different, and often very troubled. CLEAN is fantastic. I hope that it finds readers who have the courage, like Lanny and Trevor, to be present and be counted. To not give up, and to do the hard work necessary to do better than just survive the experience.
Lanny and Trevor discover that life is hard, but very very worth it.
Landon was a great student and star athlete with everything going for him until his young sister was hit by a car. She survived, but with severe handicaps, and Lanny's family has become all about Joelle and her care. His overwhelmed and overwrought parents are angry and hostile, and don't even bother to acknowledge Lanny most days. Lanny and his parents share guilt and blame for the tragedy of Joelle's accident, and Lanny takes it super hard. He turns to alcohol to hide his pain, and he gets his alcohol from the school bad-boy, Trevor.
Trevor is a burn out. He lives each day in fear, and resignation, of the continuing sexual abuse he's endured since he was twelve and his mother abandoned him with her friend, Carl. When he can, Trevor seeks oblivion via alcohol and pot. And Lanny, the angel-faced "clean" boy that sometimes lurks in Carl's gardening shed with him. When they are drunk, it's easy to seek other releases, and Trevor's easily able to direct some impersonal (non-penetrative) sex between them.
Lanny feels like Trevor's the only person in his life who sees him. Trevor's too afraid to love anyone, and doesn't believe he's worthy of love, in any case. That said, he sees how far Lanny is slipping--he's been kicked off the football team, he's failing classes and he spends every night getting bombed. Soon they move on to pills, supplied by a mutual friend. Trevor knows his only way out of Carl's lecherous grasp is death, or cleaning up and graduating high school. He tries to get Lanny to clean out, too, but Lanny's not having it.
Expect things to get worse. Expect there to be real terror on the pages, especially for Trevor when he discovers just how far gone Lanny is.
This story is a story of redemption. It is an honest and harrowing tale of hitting rock bottom, and surviving. The first half is the descent, and the second half is the rise, and it's not an easy road on either side. Yet, it was told brilliantly, with Lanny rediscovering himself, and his family becoming a strong and supportive unit again. Lanny does what Trevor can't--forgive himself. And his recovery is well-defined in the general Twelve Step way. This may be a YA tale, but the truth of it applies to people at all ages and stages.
It is also an M/M tale--a dash of romance. Lanny is definitely attracted to Trevor, and acknowledges that he is gay. Trevor was not sure of his orientation--he's not attracted to Carl in the least--but he does acknowledge that he's attracted to Lanny, and feels the most love for him that he has of any of the few people who've been in his life. There is some sexuality on the page--most consensual, some abuse. Both are told honestly and without glorification.
Part of Lanny's recovery is making amends for his use and abuse of Trevor, who is dumbstruck that Lanny feels any need to apologize. Trevor's been mired in guilt over ever giving Lanny any substances to abuse in the first place. Lanny's steadfast determination to be a real friend to Trevor, not an escape, allows both boys to come to terms with the ills of their past. I adored how very healthy all of this was, and how it engendered a real and beneficial relationship.
At no point did I feel there was any shortcut or glossing over of the tragedy and healing in this story. I think the writing was excellent, if unconventional. Trevor's POV pages are especially fraught with his fragmented internal narrative. He's contrary and cagey, and always looking to defend himself and his emotions by denying them. He's honest with Lanny about being a liar--having hidden so much of himself, never believing that anyone could (or would) want to help him--that he is dirty, filthy, unlovable and unwholesome because of his abuse. It made for a very poignant counterpoint to Lanny's squeaky-clean, but detached family.
I always struggle to read books that feature abuse of a minor, because I'm a mom, and I hate that this happens IRL. Reading is my escape from MY everyday problems, in many cases, so I prefer the lighter fare. That said, an intense read like CLEAN serves a very important purpose in highlighting the experiences of people who are very different, and often very troubled. CLEAN is fantastic. I hope that it finds readers who have the courage, like Lanny and Trevor, to be present and be counted. To not give up, and to do the hard work necessary to do better than just survive the experience.
Lanny and Trevor discover that life is hard, but very very worth it.
December 21, 2015
3,5
В целом очень депрессивно(( Если подробнее, то книга делится на две части, первая из которых абсолютный и беспросветный dark. Только что расчлененки нет, а так ощущения от прочтения гнетущие. Написано очень, прямо очень хорошо! Герои аутентичны, логичны в плане характера (не всегда в плане поступков, увы), живые.
Во второй части ситуация улучшается, но тут как раз был перебор с анонимным алкоголизмом и растянутыми описаниями. Бесило, когда герой обсуждал одно и то же с двумя, а то и тремя (!) второстепенными персонажами. В такие моменты казалось, что сюжет топчется на месте.
Книгу можно почитать, но для этого нужно особое настроение.
В целом очень депрессивно(( Если подробнее, то книга делится на две части, первая из которых абсолютный и беспросветный dark. Только что расчлененки нет, а так ощущения от прочтения гнетущие. Написано очень, прямо очень хорошо! Герои аутентичны, логичны в плане характера (не всегда в плане поступков, увы), живые.
Во второй части ситуация улучшается, но тут как раз был перебор с анонимным алкоголизмом и растянутыми описаниями. Бесило, когда герой обсуждал одно и то же с двумя, а то и тремя (!) второстепенными персонажами. В такие моменты казалось, что сюжет топчется на месте.
Книгу можно почитать, но для этого нужно особое настроение.
January 8, 2016
if you aren't into angst and troubled teenagers, this book definitely won't be for you. This took me a little while to get into ,but once I did I couldn't put it down. If this book wasn't so slow for me in the beginning, I would have given it a 4.5 or 5.
I think this book will have a lot of mixed reviews. Either people will love it or not like it at all.
I think this book will have a lot of mixed reviews. Either people will love it or not like it at all.
November 24, 2015
“I look at his face to see if he’s judging us because of the whole gay thing but he smiles and I know he’s cool with whoever I wanna love.”
5 beautiful stars!!! Mia Kerick knows how to take delicate subjects and make a beautiful story!! It’s gripping, heartbreaking and so beautiful!!
Trevor and Landon are both high school seniors dealing with their own family problems. Landon’s parents barely notice he’s around and Trevor lives with his abusive stepdad. So what’s a young boy do when he has no one? They both turn to drugs to take away the pain and escape their lives. Landon is the all star football player, who seems like he comes from the perfect family. You’d never think Trevor and Landon would cross paths, but they find each other and find solace in each other’s company.
This beautiful book is so well written, it touches on subjects that might be too much for some. But there’s a powerful messaage in this book! I fell in love with both of these characters and I wanted to reach in and just hug them both!! Mia Kerick is a stellar author and knows how to write a book with a powerful punch!! If you haven’t read this book yet, I suggest you do so now.
ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review. Reviewed by Melissa from Alpha Book Club
5 beautiful stars!!! Mia Kerick knows how to take delicate subjects and make a beautiful story!! It’s gripping, heartbreaking and so beautiful!!
Trevor and Landon are both high school seniors dealing with their own family problems. Landon’s parents barely notice he’s around and Trevor lives with his abusive stepdad. So what’s a young boy do when he has no one? They both turn to drugs to take away the pain and escape their lives. Landon is the all star football player, who seems like he comes from the perfect family. You’d never think Trevor and Landon would cross paths, but they find each other and find solace in each other’s company.
This beautiful book is so well written, it touches on subjects that might be too much for some. But there’s a powerful messaage in this book! I fell in love with both of these characters and I wanted to reach in and just hug them both!! Mia Kerick is a stellar author and knows how to write a book with a powerful punch!! If you haven’t read this book yet, I suggest you do so now.
ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review. Reviewed by Melissa from Alpha Book Club
October 28, 2015
This book is about two teenage boys in high school their senior year who both have a lot going on in their life. Landon has parents who barely acknowledge him and Trevor has his step dad who hurts him horribly.
They both turn to drinking then later drugs until one of them almost loses his life. This story was so sad at times and positive too with the way they both help each other in the end. There also might be parts that will be hard for some to read with what Carl Trevor's step dad had done to him. So all together this story is about what two boys go through in high school, how they sink to a very low point in their life and how they climb above it and get to a better place. Also how family who may not have been there for you before sometimes needs a kick in the butt to realize were they are going wrong. I liked how the author portrayed these characters and their struggles to go down a better road then where they were headed before.
All together I liked this book!
I received this book free in exchange for an honest review from Inked Rainbow Reads.
They both turn to drinking then later drugs until one of them almost loses his life. This story was so sad at times and positive too with the way they both help each other in the end. There also might be parts that will be hard for some to read with what Carl Trevor's step dad had done to him. So all together this story is about what two boys go through in high school, how they sink to a very low point in their life and how they climb above it and get to a better place. Also how family who may not have been there for you before sometimes needs a kick in the butt to realize were they are going wrong. I liked how the author portrayed these characters and their struggles to go down a better road then where they were headed before.
All together I liked this book!
I received this book free in exchange for an honest review from Inked Rainbow Reads.
October 10, 2015
Mia Kerik is amazing! She is not afraid to tackle tough topics... RED SHEET, INCLINATION and now CLEAN. It it tough, it is harsh, it is loving, it is kind, it is in your face about a topic all too often brushed under the carpet in the GLBT world... addiction. It lays it open, it bares its soul. IT HURTS but damn it is a very satisfying read... I'm talking in generalities because I don't want spoilers to take away one minute to take away one second of your satisfaction from reading this brilliant work by one of the best of the best M/M - YA - NA authors out there... BUY IT THE INSTANT IT COMES OUT... December 1... be there.
October 21, 2015
Clean
by Mia Kerick
Young Dudes Publishing
"I guess the best way to sum it up is that there's more pain lurking in his eyes than I'll ever know the truth of, because there's no way he'll share it with me. Just like I'll never share mine with him. We hide from all of the hurt, but it's cool that we can hide together."
Landon (Lanny) Keating is a star athlete whose personal life spirals out of control, trapped by alcohol and drug addiction. Once a star athlete, his academics and athletic career are quickly fading, and the one friend he has, Trevor Ladd, constantly pushes him away. Life at home is no better with his parents' focus completely on the care of his little sister, Joelle, rehabilitating from a brain injury. Lanny feels responsible for the circumstances of his sister's health, and the look of blame in his parents' eyes too painful. Consumed with guilt, Lanny isolates himself from everyone in the wake of his sister's life altering accident, turning to his addiction to free him.
Trevor Ladd is the high school rebel. His life at home is also broken, abandoned by his mother and sexually molested by his legal guardian. While Trevor seeks companionship from Lanny, they are both extremely vulnerable, trying to escape their home life while shuttering their innermost feelings from each other. Then something happens that triggers them both to finally face their demons.
Kerick's novel is a well-paced, well-written, and thoughtful approach to teen angst and the perils of drug and alcohol addiction. As the novel shifts focus between Lanny and Trevor's voices, we begin to see the deeper layers hidden beneath hardened exteriors, each of them revealing their true thoughts and feelings, until gradually they soften and their lives and future change for the good. Kerick is non-judgemental and compassionate, dealing with mature themes for young adults, while providing very realistic characters in Lanny and Trevor. A compelling read, Clean adds Kerick to the likes of writers who challenge us to find the hidden humanity in others. It's a positive novel to help young adults and teenagers often ignored in the journey we all share together through the obstacles of life.
RECOMMENDED by the US Review reviewed by Dylan Ward
Reviewed By Rabia Tanveer for Readers’ Favorite
Clean by Mia Kerick is the story of two high school boys who suffer from substance abuse and how they fight it. In the novel, Lanny Keating is the golden boy of Lauserville High School. He has everything a seventeen-year-old could dream of. He is a star athlete, has a scholarship for college, he is good looking and he has the undying support of his family. Everything is perfect in his life until a fateful day changes it all and now he is left floundering.
Trevor Ladd was never the star of anything. He is barely passing his classes and has issues that no one can understand. He was abandoned by his mother when he was younger and his legal guardian took him in. However, his guardian sexually abused him, and now he is a broken mess, ready to explode at the merest of touches.
When these two boys meet, they find solace in each other. They understand each other and this creates a relationship that stands on their mutual love and friendship. However, they fall into the shady world of substance abuse that almost ruins their lives. When the times comes to get clean, only one of them will be able to fight his demons and surface as a survivor. Who will it be? The Golden Boy or the Bad Boy?
Sigh, young love! Merely saying that I loved this novel will not be enough. I stayed up all night to read it and find out what happens in the end. I love it when I cannot guess the ending. Mia Kerick gave readers a rich text with amazing characters and beautifully written words. As a reader, you cannot ask for anything more! Ten shining stars for a new rising star!
Reviewed By Jack Magnus for Readers' Favorite
Clean is a young adult coming of age novel written by Mia Kerick. Lanny Keating is entering his senior year in high school as a popular football player with strong prospects for a scholarship to a good school, but underneath the strong good looks and easy charm is a troubled young man whose family became lost because of an accident. His little sister, Joelle, ran out into traffic outside a fairgrounds, and she suffered traumatic brain injuries as a result of her accident. Her father, mother and Lanny all blame themselves and each other, and their existence is fraught with tension, recrimination and barely disguised antipathy. Lanny is drawn to Trevor Ladd, another senior, someone his parents would probably refer to as one of the bad boys at school, and the time they spend together seems to consist of an emotional push and pull, as Trevor finds it hard to show emotions or trust or feel that he’s worth anything at all. Trevor lives with an abusive and controlling guardian, a man his mother left him with years before. Carl is Trevor’s shameful secret; Carl’s house the place Trevor dreads returning to each night. Trevor and Lanny drink to ease the tension and to experience a calmness and camaraderie with each other; each finding coping with the secrets of their family life easier that way. Sometimes, they’ll smoke a joint or indulge in a schoolmate’s pharmacopia of pills, and, inevitably, Lanny’s sports and academic performance decline, leaving the mere fact of his graduating with his class in doubt.
Mia Kerick’s young adult coming of age romance, Clean, is stunningly beautiful and perfectly paced as the two young men begin their processes of healing and self-discovery. I love this book. I love just about everything about it. Trevor and Lanny are marvelous characters, and their interactions ring genuine and true even throughout the worst of their problems. Kerick adroitly merges social issues such as sexual and physical abuse, family dysfunction and addiction in a compelling and lovely story that never becomes preachy, sentimental or exploitative, and her writing style is measured and perfectly suited to her story. There are passages in Clean that are lyrical and beg to be read aloud, especially some of Trevor and Lanny’s later conversations. I didn’t want the story to end and felt a bit bereft when it finally did. Clean is most highly recommended.
January 20, 2016
This was a fantastic read. It was harsh. It was dark. It was unforgiving, but most of all, it was real. With a focus on teenage lives, and what really goes on behind the scenes, it gave readers a chance to feel what it is like to be part of a life that often makes you wish you were dead. The sad thing is, so many people are truly living these lives, but this book does wonders for raising awareness and opening your eyes to what is really out there.
Our two main characters have been written exceptionally well. Not only do they have deep personalities and lots of tendencies they follow and repeat, but we have also been given the background. We get to see just why these two may be responding to life the way they are and why they are beginning to see the world and treat those in it, the way they have. There is so much depth and emotion that it was very easy to feel as though I was in the story, next to these two, trying to help them, to save them from what their lives had become.
Though the bond between the two main character can often be detrimental, it was lovely to read and feel to moments of happiness and love that they experienced with each other. They had found what and whom meant a lot to them and clung to it.
The story had a great pace. It moved quickly enough to feel as though it was real life, but also gave us moments where we got to stop and look deeper at the story. I loved the number of issues that were touched on, and the awareness that was raised. I also loved that there was a same sex bond in the book, as it needs to be written about more, as it is real life, and this author really wrote the connect between them well. It was honest and true, not just a superficial love, as a lot of same sex relationships seem to be written, in recent books.
Overall, I think this is a brilliant read. It is exciting, unputdownable and very real. I highly recommend reading it.
Our two main characters have been written exceptionally well. Not only do they have deep personalities and lots of tendencies they follow and repeat, but we have also been given the background. We get to see just why these two may be responding to life the way they are and why they are beginning to see the world and treat those in it, the way they have. There is so much depth and emotion that it was very easy to feel as though I was in the story, next to these two, trying to help them, to save them from what their lives had become.
Though the bond between the two main character can often be detrimental, it was lovely to read and feel to moments of happiness and love that they experienced with each other. They had found what and whom meant a lot to them and clung to it.
The story had a great pace. It moved quickly enough to feel as though it was real life, but also gave us moments where we got to stop and look deeper at the story. I loved the number of issues that were touched on, and the awareness that was raised. I also loved that there was a same sex bond in the book, as it needs to be written about more, as it is real life, and this author really wrote the connect between them well. It was honest and true, not just a superficial love, as a lot of same sex relationships seem to be written, in recent books.
Overall, I think this is a brilliant read. It is exciting, unputdownable and very real. I highly recommend reading it.
October 28, 2015
I was gifted with an ARC of Clean by the author in exchange for a fair review.
In the past, whenever substance addiction was brought up in novels, it often rang with preachiness. Get clean or die! And in the hands of a lesser author, this might have been true of Clean. However, the author, Ms. Kerick, shows us what addiction is through the eyes of two high school boys, Lanny Keating, the all-American jock (or so it seems) and Trevor (Trev) Ladd, the proverbial bad boy with a heart of gold, although the gold is somewhat tarnished.
Trevor has his own demons. Gay and sexually abused by his guardian, he dreams of the day when he can leave his hometown behind and get out. Anywhere is okay, as long as it's out.
On the other hand, Lanny seems to have it all, a nice although far from perfect family, a chance to play football and star at it, and he ends spiraling downward in his own path to self-destruction. He and Trev find each other, and though their path to the clean life is bumpy, they never quit and that's what overcoming addiction is all about.
Clean is not a happy novel. If you want happy and frothy, read Ms. Kerick's A Hard Day's Night or Love Spell. In sharp contrast, Clean is a grim, gritty and uncompromising look at a problem that can hit anyone regardless of their station in life, their age, sex, or their orientation.
In spite of the length of the novel, it flows along and rarely hits any slow spots. Told first-person through the eyes of the main protagonists, we can literally feel their pain as they hit rock bottom and slowly pull themselves up again. It's not pleasant, it's not funny, and it's a very painful look at how substance abuse can wreck even the most so-called perfect people. But it is a necessary novel and one worth reading. Highly recommended.
In the past, whenever substance addiction was brought up in novels, it often rang with preachiness. Get clean or die! And in the hands of a lesser author, this might have been true of Clean. However, the author, Ms. Kerick, shows us what addiction is through the eyes of two high school boys, Lanny Keating, the all-American jock (or so it seems) and Trevor (Trev) Ladd, the proverbial bad boy with a heart of gold, although the gold is somewhat tarnished.
Trevor has his own demons. Gay and sexually abused by his guardian, he dreams of the day when he can leave his hometown behind and get out. Anywhere is okay, as long as it's out.
On the other hand, Lanny seems to have it all, a nice although far from perfect family, a chance to play football and star at it, and he ends spiraling downward in his own path to self-destruction. He and Trev find each other, and though their path to the clean life is bumpy, they never quit and that's what overcoming addiction is all about.
Clean is not a happy novel. If you want happy and frothy, read Ms. Kerick's A Hard Day's Night or Love Spell. In sharp contrast, Clean is a grim, gritty and uncompromising look at a problem that can hit anyone regardless of their station in life, their age, sex, or their orientation.
In spite of the length of the novel, it flows along and rarely hits any slow spots. Told first-person through the eyes of the main protagonists, we can literally feel their pain as they hit rock bottom and slowly pull themselves up again. It's not pleasant, it's not funny, and it's a very painful look at how substance abuse can wreck even the most so-called perfect people. But it is a necessary novel and one worth reading. Highly recommended.
December 8, 2015
as i'm sure you've read in other reviews, this is not an easy story to read...it is gritty and painful and one of the most realistic fiction stories i've ever read. you will laugh, you will cry, you will get angry, you will have hope and in the end you will have some happiness. mia's writing is as good as always and she tackles some pretty tough issues in this book - drug & alcohol abuse, sexual abuse, parental abandonment, parental neglect, co-dependency and the regular struggles of high school kids.
my heart really hurt for these kids...as a mother especially. i have never understood how someone can abandon a child, i just don't get it. i also don't understand how you can completely disregard a child when something bad happens to your other child or blame them for something that wasn't their fault. i was so mad at both landon's and trevor's parents for the way these boys were treated. i was appalled that landon's coaches didn't do something besides kick him off the teams when they could see that he was spiraling out of control. i was a bit let down when the administrators didn't do more than just meet with the kids that were failing in their senior year! i will never understand child sexual abuse. while these boys made the decision to turn to drugs, alcohol and eve sex to cope with life, they were hardly alone in the guilt for their downfall. their success by the end of the story was worth the struggle you go through in reading the first part of the story. they are pretty sweet together in the end and i was glad to see some of the characters heal with them.
i am one of those readers that never feels done with a story and always wants a follow up but mia did an outstanding job of writing a complete story and feels absolutely finished at the end. yes, i would love to read more about them some day but the end is perfect as is.
my heart really hurt for these kids...as a mother especially. i have never understood how someone can abandon a child, i just don't get it. i also don't understand how you can completely disregard a child when something bad happens to your other child or blame them for something that wasn't their fault. i was so mad at both landon's and trevor's parents for the way these boys were treated. i was appalled that landon's coaches didn't do something besides kick him off the teams when they could see that he was spiraling out of control. i was a bit let down when the administrators didn't do more than just meet with the kids that were failing in their senior year! i will never understand child sexual abuse. while these boys made the decision to turn to drugs, alcohol and eve sex to cope with life, they were hardly alone in the guilt for their downfall. their success by the end of the story was worth the struggle you go through in reading the first part of the story. they are pretty sweet together in the end and i was glad to see some of the characters heal with them.
i am one of those readers that never feels done with a story and always wants a follow up but mia did an outstanding job of writing a complete story and feels absolutely finished at the end. yes, i would love to read more about them some day but the end is perfect as is.
December 1, 2015
Original blog Post: Happy Happy Release Day!!! Blog Tour, eARC Review, Excerpt, Author Interview & #Giveaway: Clean by Mia Kerick
Review by: multitaskingmomma
My Rating: 5 of 5 Stars
I cannot give this anything lower than five stars and Clean is definitely a Must Read. However, I must warn readers: this is not for everyone. There are triggers everywhere and it is raw. It bleeds in it's rawness, probably the reason why this is rated so high and deservedly so.
As a mother, Mia Kerick has her children always at the back of her thoughts and they are revealed in her stories. Clean delves on a topic that may be considered as one of a mother's worst nightmare. No mother wants their children to get into drug addiction.
Lanny and Trevor are young teenaged men who went down that way. Drug addiction not only attacks the body in betraying it to crave for a substance, but it also betrays the mind. No matter how logical or intelligent a brain is, it can be fooled by traitorous substances. Some worse than others.
For such a heavy, drama, angst-ridden story line, this reads clean. Not meant as a pun, but it is a clean story. No lumps, no bumps, (excepting a few typos as I do base this read on an ARC so is not considered retail perfect) and flows fast. There is no hesitation to the telling, which made this read easier than it really was.
Overall, Clean is not for everyone. It is not for me. But I do recommend it as I recognize the need for extraordinary stories out there.
Brilliant.
Review by: multitaskingmomma
My Rating: 5 of 5 Stars
I cannot give this anything lower than five stars and Clean is definitely a Must Read. However, I must warn readers: this is not for everyone. There are triggers everywhere and it is raw. It bleeds in it's rawness, probably the reason why this is rated so high and deservedly so.
As a mother, Mia Kerick has her children always at the back of her thoughts and they are revealed in her stories. Clean delves on a topic that may be considered as one of a mother's worst nightmare. No mother wants their children to get into drug addiction.
Lanny and Trevor are young teenaged men who went down that way. Drug addiction not only attacks the body in betraying it to crave for a substance, but it also betrays the mind. No matter how logical or intelligent a brain is, it can be fooled by traitorous substances. Some worse than others.
For such a heavy, drama, angst-ridden story line, this reads clean. Not meant as a pun, but it is a clean story. No lumps, no bumps, (excepting a few typos as I do base this read on an ARC so is not considered retail perfect) and flows fast. There is no hesitation to the telling, which made this read easier than it really was.
Overall, Clean is not for everyone. It is not for me. But I do recommend it as I recognize the need for extraordinary stories out there.
Brilliant.
July 9, 2016
I received a free ebook copy in exchange for an honest review.
When I first started Clean, my expectations weren't too high. And I thought the beginning was a little unimpressive. But holy shit, it got better and better as the story progressed. It was so worth the read.
This is a super slow burn romance, and that's what makes it so beautiful. At first, Lanny and Trevor are just fooling around, but they slowly become friends and later that blooms into love. ZOMG, THE FEELS. Oh, the feels *squeals like a fangirl*. This was a super sweet love story.
The romance isn't the only part of the story, though. I appreciate how Lanny's struggle with addiction wasn't glossed over or used for drama. It was handled with tact and care by the author. And I also thought it was really inspiring how Lanny was able to overcome that, with the support of his family and friends.
I'm not sure how I feel about the subplot of Trevor's abuse. It wasn't used as a shock tactic at all, and I am relieved about that, but I have a small feeling maybe that storyline wasn't as developed as it could have been.
Also, to whom it may concern: There is a typo on page 278 . Lanny's name is used in place of Trevor's, which was an extremely confusing moment... So..I hope that gets fixed. This typo was only in the arc version, so all's well that ends well :)
Tl;dr- Other than a few small things ^^, I really enjoyed this and I highly recommend it. It's a really sweet story.
When I first started Clean, my expectations weren't too high. And I thought the beginning was a little unimpressive. But holy shit, it got better and better as the story progressed. It was so worth the read.
This is a super slow burn romance, and that's what makes it so beautiful. At first, Lanny and Trevor are just fooling around, but they slowly become friends and later that blooms into love. ZOMG, THE FEELS. Oh, the feels *squeals like a fangirl*. This was a super sweet love story.
The romance isn't the only part of the story, though. I appreciate how Lanny's struggle with addiction wasn't glossed over or used for drama. It was handled with tact and care by the author. And I also thought it was really inspiring how Lanny was able to overcome that, with the support of his family and friends.
I'm not sure how I feel about the subplot of Trevor's abuse. It wasn't used as a shock tactic at all, and I am relieved about that, but I have a small feeling maybe that storyline wasn't as developed as it could have been.
Tl;dr- Other than a few small things ^^, I really enjoyed this and I highly recommend it. It's a really sweet story.
December 3, 2015
Review
5 Weeping Stars
This was a very difficult book for me to read. I am a mother of five wonderful children. Correction adults. The youngest being 19. The author doesn’t hold back and although this book is a work of fiction, so many people lose themselves to addiction making this a powerful enlightening story.
This book takes us on the downward spiral of two teens trying to escape the horror that is their lives. We see them struggle and hit rock bottom as they try to dull their pain with drugs, alcohol and any other means of escape. In all their struggles they manage to form a relationship/friendship.
Although this is a great book to read, I can not say that I enjoyed it. It is hard to enjoy something so tragic, but I feel it is a book that every parent should read and then take a good hard look at what is going on in the lives of their children. Something that in this book Lanny’s parents didn’t do until it was almost too late.
ARC Provided by the author through Alpha Book Club. Honest review done by Mollien, for Alpha Book Club without influence from publisher or author.
5 Weeping Stars
This was a very difficult book for me to read. I am a mother of five wonderful children. Correction adults. The youngest being 19. The author doesn’t hold back and although this book is a work of fiction, so many people lose themselves to addiction making this a powerful enlightening story.
This book takes us on the downward spiral of two teens trying to escape the horror that is their lives. We see them struggle and hit rock bottom as they try to dull their pain with drugs, alcohol and any other means of escape. In all their struggles they manage to form a relationship/friendship.
Although this is a great book to read, I can not say that I enjoyed it. It is hard to enjoy something so tragic, but I feel it is a book that every parent should read and then take a good hard look at what is going on in the lives of their children. Something that in this book Lanny’s parents didn’t do until it was almost too late.
ARC Provided by the author through Alpha Book Club. Honest review done by Mollien, for Alpha Book Club without influence from publisher or author.
December 2, 2015
When you read the Author's note at beginning of Clean ... you get an honest view of the world of temporary resolve through the use of legal or illegal substances.
Lanny and Trevor met during high school, each trying to escape from their respective lives and problems.
Both are drowned in the inferno of using and abusing. Life is not easy ... so much more when Lanny and Trevor don't communicate with each other. Not really ... because they are not really friends.... they are users in the complete sense of the word.
When the nightmares almost become reality Lanny and Trevor need to make sure that the changes already started by Trevor transfer to Lanny.
Lanny and Trevor start a new friendship based on amends and the truth. Based upon the understanding that you can always work hard to come out of the proverbial rock bottom.
Clean is a story of abuse , choices , understanding , sobriety and ultimately forgiveness of oneself in order to love and be loved.
http://bikebookreviews.blogspot.com/2...
Lanny and Trevor met during high school, each trying to escape from their respective lives and problems.
Both are drowned in the inferno of using and abusing. Life is not easy ... so much more when Lanny and Trevor don't communicate with each other. Not really ... because they are not really friends.... they are users in the complete sense of the word.
When the nightmares almost become reality Lanny and Trevor need to make sure that the changes already started by Trevor transfer to Lanny.
Lanny and Trevor start a new friendship based on amends and the truth. Based upon the understanding that you can always work hard to come out of the proverbial rock bottom.
Clean is a story of abuse , choices , understanding , sobriety and ultimately forgiveness of oneself in order to love and be loved.
http://bikebookreviews.blogspot.com/2...
January 8, 2016
Clean provides a raw look at how tragedy can fuel teenage substance abuse. It isn't an easy read, but it is a good one. Trigger warnings: substance abuse, sexual abuse
The book is broken up into two parts. I'd like to think of it as a before and after of sorts. While the first part is gritty and painful, the second part provides a powerful message of hope and redemption for Trevor and Lanny.
I was a bit put off by the writing style in the beginning. At times the internal dialogue didn't feel as genuine and realistic as the rest of the book. However, by the end of the book, I grew to enjoy it.
* This book was provided by the author in exchange for an honest review. *
The book is broken up into two parts. I'd like to think of it as a before and after of sorts. While the first part is gritty and painful, the second part provides a powerful message of hope and redemption for Trevor and Lanny.
I was a bit put off by the writing style in the beginning. At times the internal dialogue didn't feel as genuine and realistic as the rest of the book. However, by the end of the book, I grew to enjoy it.
* This book was provided by the author in exchange for an honest review. *
November 24, 2015
Five Powerful Stars! This book approaches a difficult subject of drug/alcohol abuse. Landon and Trevor both come from families that are not your loving home. They are both seniors in high school and end up turning to alcohol and drugs. The story is told from both of their POVs and the author gives as a look into their minds high on a substance. Mia does a fantastic job at looking at the world of substance abuse. I highly recommend this book!
ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review. This book was read and reviewed by Annamaria for Alpha Book Club.
ARC provided by author in exchange for an honest review. This book was read and reviewed by Annamaria for Alpha Book Club.
October 25, 2015
ARC provided by RT Reviews. Full review to come.
Want to read
January 25, 2016As of 1/25/15 "Clean" is on sale via Amazon (US) for $1.59
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B016...
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B016...
dnf-not-4-me
June 6, 2017MC's in high school. Not my bag.
December 22, 2015
First, many thanks to Mia Kerick, who provided a free copy of Clean in exchange for an honest review.
Once, a few years ago, I found myself home alone one night, and ran across Schindler’s List while channel surfing. I had never seen it, and the version that was on was the full length uncut version. I thought about it for a minute, then decided to watch it. I bawled my way all the way through it, but at the end decided that every human being should have to watch it at least once. If you are not on the verge of a nervous breakdown after watching that movie, then you seriously need to check your lack of a soul.
Now, I am not comparing Clean to Schindler’s List: that would be like comparing a scraped knee to a tactical nuke. It is similar in this respect: it’s not an easy read. It’s not fluffy at all and it will make you mad as hell, both at the main characters and for them. These are characters that are made to deal with aspects of life that they never should have been exposed to, and situations where they were let down by adults that were supposed to protect them. This is the story of Trevor and Lanny’s downward spiral into (and back out of) addiction.
Trevor Ladd, our first MC - has a rough life. He is trapped with a guardian who demands sexual favors for his room and board, which seems like a dangerous coin to require by force to me. He works at a gas station, and the only things he cares about in life are his car, Lanny Keating, and leaving town as soon as he hits 18. He and Lanny hooked up and started drinking together, and despite his efforts not to care, Lanny becomes more and more important to him as time goes by. He’s bound and determined not to screw Lanny, to keep him “clean” but soon they are doing everything but. It’s an endless game of push and pull with Trevor. He pushes Lanny away with his harsh words and attitude, only to pull him closer every time they hook up, drink, and fool around. Trevor feels unworthy of love, and his inner dialogue can be downright painful at times. He can tell that Lanny is getting in too deep with the alcohol, but desperately wants to keep the connection between them.
Lanny Keating, aka jock boy, was the school football star, but at this point has gotten kicked off of the team for missing practice and partying too much to play effectively. His life, while not as terrible as Trevor’s is still a mess. His little sister, Joelle, was injured in an accident when the family was distracted at the fair, causing brain injury and massive parental guilt. Lanny’s mom blames him for Joelle’s accident, and his father has reacted by burying himself at work. They are both so focused on his little sister’s injuries and therapy that they are completely missing the fact that their son is developing a serious drinking problem. His parents will massively piss you off with the way they treat their son. Lanny’s dealing with his own guilt over the accident as well, which leads to his drinking. Lanny is almost desperately attached to Trevor, even though Trevor comes off as cold and harsh with him, except for when he has a good buzz on, which are the times that Lanny lives for.
Things soon escalate from the boys just getting drunk together when another boy is added to the group who introduces them to both pot and pills. Trevor and Lanny both partake, but it is Lanny that goes into it head over feet, only seeking to silence his pain. Trevor realizes that the only way he will be able to get out of his situation is to graduate high school and leave home when he comes of age. Trevor quits everything cold turkey and tries his best to get Lanny to abandon the “partying” as well. Truly alone now, Lanny spiralled deeper into addiction, his “breakup” with Trevor only adding fuel to the fire.
Like I said earlier, this isn’t an easy story to read. Lanny hits rock bottom and continues digging, but never fear - it gets very dark, but ends on a happy note. I found myself respecting Trevor more than I did Lanny, simply because Trevor sobered up by sheer willpower alone. He wasn’t afforded half of the benefits that Lanny had available to him. The scenes after their recovery were well done - as other reviewers have mentioned, I too appreciated that they did not just jump into a relationship when they both sobered up. Trevor’s drinking problems were only the tip of the iceberg with him, and they were acknowledged and dealt with in a very believable manner. You will find yourself rooting for these characters, and wanting the best for them. This author has portrayed the subject of addiction without glossing over it, and shed some light that was long overdue.
November 5, 2015
Teens receive messages about the dangers of drugs from a range of media and social interactions, but often there is still the promise that ingesting a drug will mitigate psychological pain and overwhelming emotions. Attracted to drugs because of their confusing, evolving feelings, many a young adult falls into the drug world, never to emerge.
While Clean opens with a preface about this subject, it chooses the novel format (not nonfiction) to deliver its hard-hitting message about why teens choose drugs and what happens when they try to erase the harsh realities of their environments by creating an artificial inner bliss.
The first thing to note about Clean is that it's a psychological examination; not a thriller piece. Where other books would focus on drug-taking events and interactions between individuals, Clean tasks its characters with something different: revealing their motivations and emotions: "… it’s not like I want to think about this stuff, but I can’t stop myself. The “stuff” I don’t want to think about is really people. The people I have hurt so much lately because of my bad habits."
A prologue opens with Lanny's latest drug of choice (a common household item) but then moves backwards in time, five months earlier, to where his hookup with a male classmate is ending. Perspectives switch between the two boys, and readers are treated to gritty observations that punctuate stiff language with gritty insights: "Times like this I wish my life had a giant red bail out button I could press and just disappear. I’d press it right now I would."
Sex, drugs, school and home pressures, and changed home lives: Clean mixes its drug experiences with messages about the different kinds of pressures teens experience, how they perceive and handle them, and the temptation to flee (however temporarily) life's realities. It also reveals how taking drugs alters not only their experiences and awareness, but affects the reactions of others who react differently to the changed behaviors of a person high on drugs.
All this is wrapped in a plot that moves back and forth through time in clearly-marked chapter headings, charting changing encounters from home life to the wider world, and surveys how kids stumble onto the wrong path and how they come clean.
What does it mean to be and stay clean; to live a drug-free life confronting all one's demons past, present and future without the mitigating aid of a chemical? Add an ongoing romance between two boys who struggle with different aspects and impacts of love and drugs and you have a very different story than most: a hard-hitting, street-wise series of encounters that don't let up and which stay true to the sexual and social milieu of teen life.
Supplement these insights with parents' perceptions of their children and you have a multi-faceted story that, more so than most, hones in on the reasons for staying sober or choosing chemicals in a story fueled by the contrast between a star athlete who chooses drugs and the efforts of a 'loser' to escape his destiny.
December 4, 2015
Overall Stars: 5 STARS
Addiction
M/M
Trying to escape their reality of pain, two barely-men will turn to each other for comfort
High school senior Lanny Keating has it all. A three-sport athlete at Lauserville High School looking at a college football scholarship, with a supportive family, stellar grades, boy band good looks… until the fateful day when it all falls apart.
Seventeen-year-old Trevor Ladd has always been a publicly declared zero and the high school badboy. Abandoned by his mother and sexually abused by his legal guardian, Trevor sets his sights on mere survival.
Lanny seeks out Trevor’s companionship to avoid his shattered home life. Unwilling to share their personal experiences of pain, the boys explore ways to escape, leading them into sexual experimentation, and the abuse of illegal drugs and alcohol. Their mutual suffering creates a lasting bond of friendship and love.
When the time finally comes to get clean and sober, or flunk out of high school, only one of the boys will graduate, while the other spirals downward into addiction.
Will Lanny and Trevor find the strength to battle their demons of mind-altering substances as well as emotional vulnerability? (Amazon Blurb)
Too often we hear the stories on the television, the newspapers and now on social medias informing the curious and the hungry for the reality of our society, the horrors of what is still being debated as being accepted completely by our youths (in high school) and that being of same sex relationships and addiction. Mia Kerick’s Clean is THE novel that takes these ‘taboo’ conversations or topics, delves right in and opens the readers mind and eyes about these subjects and their importance, making us realize that it can’t be ignored or hidden behind a veil anymore. Lanny and Trevor have each experienced their own private hells and look towards each other for comfort only to turn to drugs, alcohol, addiction and sexual experiences that change them in ways they never thought possible. Clean is the type of novel that doesn’t sugar coat the truth or pretend that high school same sex relationships are as easy or accepted as heterosexual relationships: quite the opposite, more often than not, these youths are still faced with the same hurdles, discriminations and even ridicule. The difference, is that compared to 10 years ago, the internet has made it so much easier to gain access to the ‘targets’ and hurt them. I loved how Mia Kerick kept her novel true, emotional and vulnerable – aspects that you would rarely see in young adult novels.
.
**Received a copy in exchange for an honest review. Read and reviewed by Kathleen for Alpha Book Club**
Addiction
M/M
Trying to escape their reality of pain, two barely-men will turn to each other for comfort
High school senior Lanny Keating has it all. A three-sport athlete at Lauserville High School looking at a college football scholarship, with a supportive family, stellar grades, boy band good looks… until the fateful day when it all falls apart.
Seventeen-year-old Trevor Ladd has always been a publicly declared zero and the high school badboy. Abandoned by his mother and sexually abused by his legal guardian, Trevor sets his sights on mere survival.
Lanny seeks out Trevor’s companionship to avoid his shattered home life. Unwilling to share their personal experiences of pain, the boys explore ways to escape, leading them into sexual experimentation, and the abuse of illegal drugs and alcohol. Their mutual suffering creates a lasting bond of friendship and love.
When the time finally comes to get clean and sober, or flunk out of high school, only one of the boys will graduate, while the other spirals downward into addiction.
Will Lanny and Trevor find the strength to battle their demons of mind-altering substances as well as emotional vulnerability? (Amazon Blurb)
Too often we hear the stories on the television, the newspapers and now on social medias informing the curious and the hungry for the reality of our society, the horrors of what is still being debated as being accepted completely by our youths (in high school) and that being of same sex relationships and addiction. Mia Kerick’s Clean is THE novel that takes these ‘taboo’ conversations or topics, delves right in and opens the readers mind and eyes about these subjects and their importance, making us realize that it can’t be ignored or hidden behind a veil anymore. Lanny and Trevor have each experienced their own private hells and look towards each other for comfort only to turn to drugs, alcohol, addiction and sexual experiences that change them in ways they never thought possible. Clean is the type of novel that doesn’t sugar coat the truth or pretend that high school same sex relationships are as easy or accepted as heterosexual relationships: quite the opposite, more often than not, these youths are still faced with the same hurdles, discriminations and even ridicule. The difference, is that compared to 10 years ago, the internet has made it so much easier to gain access to the ‘targets’ and hurt them. I loved how Mia Kerick kept her novel true, emotional and vulnerable – aspects that you would rarely see in young adult novels.
.
**Received a copy in exchange for an honest review. Read and reviewed by Kathleen for Alpha Book Club**
November 25, 2015
CLEAN
Mia Kerick
YoungDudes Publishing (2015)
ISBN 9781517581046
Reviewed by Sheri Hoyte for Reader Views (11/15)
“Clean” by Mia Kerick is the story of two boys and their coming of age journeys through high school and beyond. Lanny Keating is the high-school super jock, he is good looking, gets high grades, and will most likely receive a college football scholarship. Lanny seemingly has everything going for him until one tragic day when his entire world crumbles in an instant. Trevor Ladd is the high school bad boy. He was abandoned by his mother and sexually abused by his legal guardian. For Trevor, the focus is not on grades or college, but on mere survival.
The two boys form an unlikely friendship in an effort to escape the turmoil of their home lives. Neither one of them know how to express what they are going through and are too embarrassed and unwilling to share the details of their pain with each other. In a mutual desire to block the pain, the boys delve into illegal drugs and alcohol and sexual experimentation, creating a bond, albeit unhealthy, of friendship and love. As the end of their senior year approaches, the boys must choose a path: clean up their act and graduate from high school or continue down the road of addiction. Will they have the courage and strength they need to conquer their fears and addictions?
Mia Kerick does it again in a haunting tale of substance and sexual abuse that would take down the strongest of people, let alone two vulnerable teens. The writing is blunt, and to the point. Readers are not spared any of the graphic details as Lanny and Trevor tread their way through life. It is harsh. It is real. It is as shocking and offensive as it needs to be. There is no way to sugar coat any of the topics raised in this book, so Kerick tells it like it is. That being the case, I found it hard to read at times, my faith in humanity was thoroughly tested throughout much of the story.
"Clean" by Mia Kerick is a must-read story about the social issues that influence our youth. I would definitely recommend this book to all parents of middle and high school students. Though a work of fiction, there is no way a responsible person could ignore the harsh realities covered in this book.
Mia Kerick
YoungDudes Publishing (2015)
ISBN 9781517581046
Reviewed by Sheri Hoyte for Reader Views (11/15)
“Clean” by Mia Kerick is the story of two boys and their coming of age journeys through high school and beyond. Lanny Keating is the high-school super jock, he is good looking, gets high grades, and will most likely receive a college football scholarship. Lanny seemingly has everything going for him until one tragic day when his entire world crumbles in an instant. Trevor Ladd is the high school bad boy. He was abandoned by his mother and sexually abused by his legal guardian. For Trevor, the focus is not on grades or college, but on mere survival.
The two boys form an unlikely friendship in an effort to escape the turmoil of their home lives. Neither one of them know how to express what they are going through and are too embarrassed and unwilling to share the details of their pain with each other. In a mutual desire to block the pain, the boys delve into illegal drugs and alcohol and sexual experimentation, creating a bond, albeit unhealthy, of friendship and love. As the end of their senior year approaches, the boys must choose a path: clean up their act and graduate from high school or continue down the road of addiction. Will they have the courage and strength they need to conquer their fears and addictions?
Mia Kerick does it again in a haunting tale of substance and sexual abuse that would take down the strongest of people, let alone two vulnerable teens. The writing is blunt, and to the point. Readers are not spared any of the graphic details as Lanny and Trevor tread their way through life. It is harsh. It is real. It is as shocking and offensive as it needs to be. There is no way to sugar coat any of the topics raised in this book, so Kerick tells it like it is. That being the case, I found it hard to read at times, my faith in humanity was thoroughly tested throughout much of the story.
"Clean" by Mia Kerick is a must-read story about the social issues that influence our youth. I would definitely recommend this book to all parents of middle and high school students. Though a work of fiction, there is no way a responsible person could ignore the harsh realities covered in this book.
November 29, 2015
*copy provided to Bayou Book Junkie by author/publisher via Divine Magazine in exchange for an honest review*
This is Lanny and Trevor's story. Two high school seniors who we watch spiral
into the depths of alcohol and drug use.
Lanny and Trevor tell a powerful story. I say this because, I definitely saw this story through their eyes. I never once felt like I was being told this story. I felt I lived this story with Lanny and Trevor. I told my co-blogger at about 10%, I may have to break this up and read something else in between bouts of this story. It wasn't that the writing was bad, the writing was excellent, but that the story is so raw, gritty, sad and emotional I wasn't sure I could make it through the entire book and not end up in a really dark place. But I didn't read anything else, because Lanny and Trev pulled me in and wouldn't let me step away from their story. They held on tight until I got to the last page. This was an amazing story, but it gutted me to read it at times.
Mia tackles some very tough subject matters in this story. Drug use, alcoholism, sexual, mental and physical abuse. This wasn't an easy story to read at times, but it gets easier as the story progresses. Although this wasn't an easy read, I'm really glad Mia didn't take the easy route and skip over Trevor and Lanny's spiral into addiction. I thought the subject was handled very realistically.
Told from alternating POV's we get inside both Trevor and Lanny's head as they spiral deeper into addiction and depression. We are privy to their most inner thoughts, and these thoughts were so heartbreaking at times. This book isn't all dark though. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Mia left me hopeful and feeling the warm and fuzzies when the story was over. I loved these boys. I wanted to protect them and take them away from all the hurt.
This story was well written. It flowed well and kept me turning the pages. Highly recommended!
You can find my other reviews for Divine Magazine at ~ http://divinemagazine.net/jreviews/my...
This is Lanny and Trevor's story. Two high school seniors who we watch spiral
into the depths of alcohol and drug use.
Lanny and Trevor tell a powerful story. I say this because, I definitely saw this story through their eyes. I never once felt like I was being told this story. I felt I lived this story with Lanny and Trevor. I told my co-blogger at about 10%, I may have to break this up and read something else in between bouts of this story. It wasn't that the writing was bad, the writing was excellent, but that the story is so raw, gritty, sad and emotional I wasn't sure I could make it through the entire book and not end up in a really dark place. But I didn't read anything else, because Lanny and Trev pulled me in and wouldn't let me step away from their story. They held on tight until I got to the last page. This was an amazing story, but it gutted me to read it at times.
Mia tackles some very tough subject matters in this story. Drug use, alcoholism, sexual, mental and physical abuse. This wasn't an easy story to read at times, but it gets easier as the story progresses. Although this wasn't an easy read, I'm really glad Mia didn't take the easy route and skip over Trevor and Lanny's spiral into addiction. I thought the subject was handled very realistically.
Told from alternating POV's we get inside both Trevor and Lanny's head as they spiral deeper into addiction and depression. We are privy to their most inner thoughts, and these thoughts were so heartbreaking at times. This book isn't all dark though. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Mia left me hopeful and feeling the warm and fuzzies when the story was over. I loved these boys. I wanted to protect them and take them away from all the hurt.
This story was well written. It flowed well and kept me turning the pages. Highly recommended!
You can find my other reviews for Divine Magazine at ~ http://divinemagazine.net/jreviews/my...
November 6, 2015
After reading this novel's foreword I was expecting much from Clean. Mia Kerick didn't disappoint my expectations.
Just after a few pages I was very close to tears. Both characters take a hold of your heart and then rip it out without mercy. I really liked how different Lanny and Trevor are. So different in fact, that you can tell apart both POVs without problems (although Trevor's rambling without any comma was at times a bit exhausting to read).
The story feels very real and right up until the end, you don't know whether they will make it or not. Will they overcome their addiction? Will they become a couple? Speaking of couples... The main characters have a very unhealthy relationship with each other - mostly thanks to the drugs - but that relationship still feels somehow innocent and makes total sense.
Disclaimer: The author provided me with a free copy in exchange for an honest review. Thank you.
Just after a few pages I was very close to tears. Both characters take a hold of your heart and then rip it out without mercy. I really liked how different Lanny and Trevor are. So different in fact, that you can tell apart both POVs without problems (although Trevor's rambling without any comma was at times a bit exhausting to read).
The story feels very real and right up until the end, you don't know whether they will make it or not. Will they overcome their addiction? Will they become a couple? Speaking of couples... The main characters have a very unhealthy relationship with each other - mostly thanks to the drugs - but that relationship still feels somehow innocent and makes total sense.
Disclaimer: The author provided me with a free copy in exchange for an honest review. Thank you.
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