Werde, die Du bist!

by Hedwig Dohm

Hedwig Werde, die Du bist! Wie Frauen werden. Werde, wie du bist. Novellen, Breslau (S. Schottlaender, Schlesische Verlags-Anstalt) 1894. Vollständige Neuausgabe mit einer Biographie der Autorin. Herausgegeben von Karl-Maria Guth. Berlin 2015. Textgrundlage ist die Hedwig Wie Frauen werden. Werde, die du bist. Novellen, Schlesische Buchdruckerei, Kunst- und Verlags-Anstalt v. S. Schottlaender, 1894. Die Paginierung obiger Ausgabe wird in dieser Neuausgabe als Marginalie zeilengenau mitgeführt. Umschlaggestaltung von Thomas Schultz-Overhage unter Verwendung des Fotografie um 1870. Gesetzt aus Minion Pro, 11 pt.

Genres: Feminism, German Literature, Germany, Classics

62 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 1894

About the author

1831-1919

Reviews

[Rowena · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I want to write a sort of necrology of myself. For I am at the end.”- Hedwig Dohm, Become Who You Are

This is a novella about a woman widowed in her mid 50s, and an exploration into her making sense of herself and her life after widowhood. This book was written in 1894 and Dohm was definitely ahead of her time. Lamentably so many of the issues she discusses in this book are still very much relevant today.

In the book, the protagonist is first admitted to a sanatorium, and through the diary she gives to her doctor, we are able to learn more about her and her quest into discovering who she is. But everyone thinks she’s lost her mind. Actually, she’s all too sane:

“Insanity– is this something different than the blocking of ideas; visions that come to us and that emanate from us, we know not where to and where from, and over which we have no power? If this is insanity, then I was insane for more than fifty years.”

While reading this book I couldn’t help but think of how sad this story is; I believe women are still expected to prop others up (in some cultures more than others) and one of the worst things I can think of for myself is not having a sense of my own identity. I was also stunned to learn that by the time the protagonist was in her 50s, she felt she was too old and that her life was over.

Feminist themes are plenty, and there is also a lot of insight into aging from a feminist perspective, which I don’t see being talked about too often:

“So contemptuously, so reluctantly do people look at an old woman, as if her age were a fault that deserved punishment.”

Highly recommended.

“Why did I have to live as I lived? Because I am a woman and because it stands written on ancient, bronze tablets of law how a woman ought to live? But the text is erroneous, it is erroneous.”

[Peyton · Rating 4 out of 5]

In a corner stood a decayed sculpture made of sandstone, totally enveloped with late wild roses, red roses, purple-red. I pulled the roses apart in order to see what kind of statue it was. It had no head. The column was speckled, totally red, as if blood from the headless trunk had dripped down on it and the roses were so flaming red from that. It was as if I knew to whom the head belonged that was missing from the column, and I had only forgotten it. I searched for the head in the bushes. And every time I come back to this spot, I automatically search for the head. And automatically, I feel for my own head. But it is still there. Only no longer quite so firmly attached.

Become Who You Are is a first wave German feminist novel about how one woman’s experience of aging and ‘madness’ challenges and reshapes her identity. After the death of her husband and the births of her grandchildren have made her existence socially obsolete, the protagonist Agnes begins to explore the aspects of life her role as daughter, wife and mother previously precluded. Agnes received less education as a child than her brother, who died young. Housework, childcare, and caring for her husband after he became disabled due to a stroke took up the majority of Agnes’ life.

If you hinder the growth of a tree, you also kill the fruit. You kill the shade that would have refreshed others.

Agnes decides to pursue art, fashion, travel, and intellectual pursuits. As she sees it, “it is not all in our power not to refine, not to perfect ourselves.” Agnes begins to wander and experience hallucinations and is ultimately committed to a sanitarium. All of this marks a drastic change in personality and behavior in Agnes that, to the modern reader, could be suggestive of dementia. Yet Dohm asks us to question to not only our impulse to pathologize Agnes, but also our impulse to dismiss the aging process as regressive as opposed to the logical conclusion of life. “Does a person then only live for a certain period of life? Is childhood only overture, old age only epilogue?” The ‘madness’ Agnes experiences gives her newfound courage to break with convention in order to best appreciate life.

Also included in this book is Dohm’s short polemic essay The Old Woman and some analysis of both works by the translator. This book has been on my to read list for a long time, but I put off reading it because I was worried that it would strike too close to home. I am glad that I finally read it, because it was a vindicating and cathartic experience.

[Nicolas Lontel · Rating 5 out of 5]

Une découverte assez incroyable que ce roman (1894) et cette autrice! Mise en abime d'un journal intime d'une femme âgée enfermée dans un asile parce qu'elle serait "folle" ou "dérangée", mais la lecture du journal révèle évidemment que cette folie n'est perçu que parce qu'elle refuse de se conformer aux attentes sociales réservées aux femmes de son âge.

Je dois avouer qu'à la lecture, j'avais un peu de mal à croire que le roman a été écrit au XIXe siècle puisque la lecture ne semble pas vieillotte (peut-être grâce à la traduction) et les pensées et actions du personnages, à part à quelques rares endroits, s'inscrivent parfaitement dans nos sociétés. Une femme qui toute sa vie a travaillé pour sa famille proche (ses parents, son mari, ses enfants, ses petits-enfants) en leur donnant tout son temps et qu'après la mort de son mari, elle réalise qu'elle a enfin la liberté de lire et de s'instruire comme elle en a toujours rêvée. Elle prend aussi conscience de l'attitude qu'à la société de toujours la renvoyer à son rôle, attendre sa mort, refuser de répondre à ses aspirations et à la traiter de tous les noms lorsqu'elle sort des attentes sociales.

C'est à la fois une critique de l'âgisme envers les femmes âgées, mais aussi de la reproduction d'un modèle social qui n'offre pas d'échappatoir faute d'éducation ou de simple possibilité d'être. C'est aussi une charge féministe pour l'éducation des jeunes filles et femmes, de la possession d'un salaire et de la possibilité d'écrire et de rêver à la liberté.

[Caro :) · Rating 3 out of 5]

2,75

Selbstfindung im Alter actually sehr tolles Thema, aber das in nen jüngeren Typen verlieben fand ich irgendwie stressig

(und war halt auch immer noch für die Uni, da leidet die Bewertung auch drunter naja)

[Katri Oksanen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kirja ilmestyi vuonna 1894, ja todellakin - sata vuotta liian aikaisin (kirjan suomenkielinen nimi), kuten kirjan päähenkilö Agnes Schmidtkin, joka eli elämänsä muita palvellen, kuten naiset aina olivat tehneet. Vasta viisikymppisenä leskenä viimeisinä vuosinaan hän alkoi tunnistaa omia toiveitaan ja elää niitä kuunnellen, mutta oli vanhana naisena muille näkymätön tai korkeintaan naurettava.
Hedwig Dohm (1831-1919) oli kyllä todellinen visionääri: kirjassa Agnes ennusti hyvin naisasian tilan 1900-luvun lopulla ja sen, että vielä ihminen lentääkin.

Paljon on onneksi naisen asema korjaantunut sadassa vuodessa - kiitos Hedwig Dohmin ja muiden naisasianaisten -, mutta sittenkin, jotain samaa naisen roolissa ja asemassa edelleenkin on…

[Nathalie Des livres et du thé · Rating 3 out of 5]

3,75

J’ai beaucoup aimé le fond très féministe, et avant-gardiste pour son époque, de ce livre, et j’ai trouvé l’histoire d’Agnès poignante. Mais j’ai eu un peu de mal avec le style, ses effets lyriques ponctués de nombreux points d’exclamation, de répétitions de mots, que j’ai personnellement trouvé un peu lourd et manquant de naturel.
Mais cela reste une très bonne lecture que je n’oublierai pas, d’autant que la postface est passionnante et très éclairante.

[Peggy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Texte dieser Art machen immer wieder deutlich, wieviel Frauen sich schon erkämpft haben, erkämpfen mussten. Der Weg ist noch lang, aber es wurde auch schon einiges bewältigt. Dohms Novelle ist aber schon bissl sperrig.

[Jazmine Diaz · Rating 3 out of 5]

In the beginning of my semester, I choose to read the novel Become Who You Are, in hopes to further my knowledge on characterization and setting within a book. Hedwig Dohm was an activist, writer, and thinker who was describe as “ahead of her time”. She campaigned for women’s rights and understood the inequalities women faced in the nineteenth century. During the women’s movement she challenged the specifics of gender roles and advocated for political rights. With knowing her background, it was no surprise to find out her that novel was about a woman facing the same gender inequalities and societal shame that she had witnessed.

Hedwig Dohn wrote her book about a woman named Anges Schmidt. Schmdt’s husband had passed away leaving her a widower. With this new life as a widower Anges is trying to find purpose within herself as a newly independent woman. Throughout the story we can see that society has played a role in Anges questioning her worth. In the nineteenth century woman were placed in physical, psychological, and social restraints. People believed that woman were incomplete without a man, leaving Anges to find a new identity for herself while battling societies rules. In the story everyone around her thinks she is insane for trying to find purpose and peace within herself. “Insanity – is this something different than the blocking of ideas; visions that come to us and that emanate from us, we know not where to and where from, and over which we have no power? If this is insanity, then I was insane for more than fifty years.” (Dohm pg.34) Reading this novel has helped me realize that women have been and continue to be oppressed for the idea of being independent, or the idea of being the one in charge or being a leader. Anges is not on this journey of self-discovery to please anyone else she is on this journey to be content with herself and grieve the loss she has just had. “And now, I am wrestling myself out of this insanity. I’m wrestling, wrestling for my will, for myself, for my “I”. (Dohm pg. 34)

This novel has given me a whole new understanding of characterization and setting. In this novel here I can see the setting has influenced characters actions and their thinking. With the setting taking place in the nineteenth century, we can see that women in society were taught to be easily influenced by a man and if not then she is worth nothing. Once Anges tries to break this stigma we see many eyes of shame and doubt, she is breaking the barrier that women during that time feared. This story shows perseverance, activism, and the importance of having an independent journey.

Personally, I would recommend this book if you enjoy learning about history and want to know the backstory of the oppression women faced in the nineteenth century. If you would like to read this novel it is available for purchase on Amazon with the options of having it in a Kindle for $26.95 or hardcover version for $50.57. Another option I would recommend is reading the novel on the Goodreads website, from their different options purchasing.

[Julia Goracke · Rating 4 out of 5]

Become Who You Are written by Hedwig Dohm depicts a widowed woman in her 50s on a journey to discover who she is and what she’s capable of on her own. Struggling with the thought that she’s not getting any younger, widower Agnes Schmidt works to grow and find her true identity rather than dwell on self-doubt and the expectations of women in her society of the 1890s. Throughout the 1800s to early 1900s, author Dohm fought for the rights of women in Germany. She worked hard to demonstrate women’s capabilities and strengths without the presence of a man and/or age restricting them in any way, ultimately contributing to the women’s rights movement worldwide and initiating gender equality.
The book demonstrates Agnes as a once loving wife and mother but as she loses her husband and her daughters eventually mature, she also loses her purpose in life and struggles to find herself again. On her death bed, Agnes looks to her doctor to destroy her journal after reading and understanding why she lost herself to loneliness and misdirection in her life. The journal demonstrates how after living the busy and selfless life expected of her, Agnes wanted to finally rest but she couldn’t. To her, age became her crippling enemy, and not having purpose made her uncomfortable and led her to feel worthless. The end of her story emphasizes the importance of not losing yourself to age or any other restrictions you feel you have as a woman. Instead, you should choose to find a new purpose in life and to re-establish happiness because you are always deserving of that. The passage explains, “Inactivity is the sleeping portion that you, old woman, are offered. Do not drink it! Be something! Activity is joy. And joy is almost youth,” (Dohm 79).
The format of this book emphasized to me that reestablishing your identity when changes happen in your life is a simple choice that you have to make for yourself. The character Agnes displays an example of someone who was confused on whether to follow what society expected of her or to establish expectations for herself. She was a woman who assumed that her life was over when she lost her sole purpose of being a selfless and supportive mother and wife to her family. It seemed like she gave up all hope of living a joyous and fulfilled life the second she lost her husband when there was still so much of her identity to be discovered. She almost chose to let society influence her to believe her life had no value other than to be a mother and wife but later allowed herself to have a different perspective on life as an older widowed woman. Instead, she realized that she didn’t need the approval of anyone but herself and found new meaning, value, and acceptance of herself and the reality of her life.
The passage is disheartening to me because it shows how much hurt and struggle women were conflicted with as a result of society’s brutally restricted ideas of women and what they were capable of. However, it was also enlightening, to gather the perspective of Dohm and the direction she worked so hard to steer women’s rights towards, equality among genders and women who believed in being confidently dependable on themselves and identifying their strengths.

[Sheridan Macon · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I often have the secret feeling that I no longer know if I exist and who I am. Then I utter to myself the name Agnes Schmidt a dozen times, out of fear that I could forget it. I and Agnes Schmidt? What do we have in common?” (Dohm, 40).

Become Who You Are by Hedwig Dohm is a novel written in diary form, with little bits at the beginning and end in the third person for context. Agnes Schmidt, a sixty-year-old widow in the 1800s, has been admitted to a mental hospital in Berlin, the city she grew up in. She is described by others in the hospital as a sensational woman, whose eccentric mind betrays the poised image of herself she used to portray. Her health declines, and she gives her diary to the doctor who’s been observing her to read. This diary contains the downward spiral of Agnes who, after being widowed, experiences a massive existential crisis, and realizes she has no distinct identity.

“Are there no saints at whose feet we can lay down our suffering? Holy future! You, do plead for us old women” (Dohm, 31).

Dohm was a German feminist far ahead of her time, which really shows through her exploration of Agnes’ (and in turn, her) personal philosophy. Her descriptions of the treatment of older women by family members were striking, and they even resonated with some of my own modern-day experiences interacting with older women. As Agnes spirals, her diary entries delve deeper into the existential sense of identity: first regarding her status as an “old woman” in her time, then deeper and broadened to existence in general. Her separation of the “I” (herself in her mind) from the woman named “Agnes Schmidt” (her body) was particularly interesting to me. Agnes’ spiral is also wonderfully illustrated in the various settings she transitions through over the course of her diary. As the places Agnes found herself in became increasingly fanciful, so did her philosophy. Dohm’s sweeping descriptions of gardens, streets, oceans, and mountaintops gave her room to explore the philosophical significance behind each one. Each location had a story or metaphor tied to it that fit into Agnes’ worldview at the time of her visit, or changed her worldview during her visit.

Dohm’s tangential philosophy became a bit overbearing at times, and I definitely had to go back and re-read certain passages more than once to fully digest them. However, I found that the novel being only sixty-six pages made it so that the story was over before I felt truly weighed down by her wording. Elizabeth Ametsbichler did a wonderful job translating the intricacies of the German language, and in some tougher spots, she even included the original German word for a particular complex idea in parentheses.

I purchased this novel used in “good” condition on Amazon for around $17.00, with the paperback and kindle versions running at around $22.00 and the hardcover being listed at around $48.00.

[Desiree Liranzo · Rating 4 out of 5]

My novel and the subject of my review is on “Become Who You Are” by Elizabeth Dohm. The setting to this story is at a mental hospital in Berlin of Agnes Schmidt a wonderfully innocent in mind woman in her elder fifties whom is trying so hard to find herself. She has been widowed for some time now and the fragments of her thoughts come and go to her as swiftly as the days become night. It follows, in the beginning, the fascination of the Neurologist Doctor Behrend who treats her and him trying very hard to find out whatever he can about her and her past. I feel she was going thru stages of dementia from the sounds of her recollections and her quick transition to confusion. In her time and era women were seldom understood or diagnosed as they are today with such ailments. In a predominately-male showvanist tone for that time in her marriage, women were not seen as strong individuals unless they were married to strong men of character. Mainly looked upon as doting wives and mothers were their one and only main tasks. “And evening after evening, my groom, Eduard Schmidt, came, and I cut and buttered bread for him, and he appeared to me to be so clever, because he knew so much about which I had no idea.” (Dohm 11). I see that Agnes always had a purpose in her life something to do or get done. By loosing her husband and her children no longer children but now adults with their own families she felt so in the way and burden. Throughout the story, Doctor Behrend reads Agnes’ diary a journal she kept with wondrous retellings over her years. The Doctor tried as best he could to understand her and her illness find the root of this illness and although he was unsuccessful. “Still, he was touched by deep human emotion as he now stepped to the bed of the dying woman” (Dohm 65). This book deals with aging, self-worth and the long run and what I mean by that is no one truly is prepared ever for how their lives will be when you have aged and lost your sense of self. As a woman and a single parent, it does make me wonder who will be by my bedside at my time of death; will I be a burden to my own children? Only time will tell.

[Senni Oksanen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Luettu suomeksi. Kirjan suomenkielinen nimi on Sata vuotta liian aikaisin, mikä valitettavasti kuvastaa hyvin kirjailijan omaa elämää. On vaikeaa ajatella, miten huomattavan paljon aikaansa edellä kirjailija onkaan ollut, ja miten vuonna 1894 julkaistulla kirjalla on edelleen paikkansa yhteiskunnassamme.

Tällaista kirjaa en ole lukenut koskaan aikaisemmin. Sitä, miten paljon historiallista ja yhteiskunnallista arvoa sekä teos että sen tekijä omaavat, on mahdotonta kuvailla sanoin.

Teoksen kirjoitustyyli on suorastaan ihastuttava yhdistelmä romantiikkaa ja realismia, ja kirjan päiväkirjamaiset tekstit päästävät lukijan suoraan tapahtumien ytimeen: päähenkilön pään sisälle. Mikä tekee kirjasta erinomaisen on se, että tällaisen päähenkilön ääntä en ole kuullut missään - varsinkaan 1800-luvulla julkaistussa - mediassa.

Naurettavaa, itkettävää on se, että teoksesta on helppoa löytää tarttumapintaa edelleen, yli sadan vuoden jälkeen. Jokainen nainen, sekä vanha että nuori, voi samaistua päähenkilön ajatuksiin. Kirja tuo suoraan silmiemme eteen ristiriidan vanhenemisesta: sen, että vanhaa miestä pidetään elämänkokeneena ja viisaana - sellaisena, jota kannattaa kuunnella, kun taas vanhaa naista yhteiskunta pyrkii keinolla millä hyvänsä hiljentämään riistäen tältä samalta ihmisyyden.

Kiitos mitä suurenmoisesta työstä, Hedwig Dohm.

[Lunaia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Das Audiobuch von LibriVox (public domain) fand ich schön anzuhören, also die Sprechstimme war sehr angenehm. Inhaltlich fand ich den Tagebuchteil etwas zu lang, aber der Text ist natürlich auch einfach schon etwas älter und daher für mich ungewohnt gewesen. Ich war aber einfach neugierig, und wollte mal einen Eindruck bekommen, was eine feministische Autorin vor mehr als hundert Jahren so geschrieben hat.

[Alexandria · Rating 4 out of 5]

Becoming Who You Are is about an old woman in an institution who, on her death bed, gave a journal she wrote to a young Doctor Behrend. The journal was a retelling of her life, so she would not forget why her mind slipped away. “I must write---yes---I must? Otherwise---otherwise what? I don’t know. Am I suffering from heart disease? Or does that come from the brain? My insides are gnawing, the sensation of bleeding to death, of ceasing to exist, and then again whirling restlessness. Its illness. What kind of illness?” (Page 8, Dohm)
Old Woman: the old Woman was strong enough to live a partially happy life but was also destroyed by living a partial life.
Dr. Behrend: a curious man who tried to help a woman who couldn't be helped
Eduard: a pleased husband who died before his wife, leaving chaos and misery
Magdalene: a good mother and daughter but fails to see what has happened to her mother truly
Grete: a good daughter but affected by the absence of her mother while becoming a women
Becoming Who You Are was a delightful book to read. The beginning is a little hard to get through because the plot is unclear, and there are many medical monotone conversations. However, once you realize your reading through a woman's journal is slowly going mad, you start reading until you have finished this intriguing story. The wording the author used to bring in this slow insanity really made me want to keep reading and know what drove her to have these thoughts and actions? “The disturbance had created a new individual.” (Page 3, Dohm)

[Edit Burla · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ganz erschuettert bin nach nach der Lektuere dieses kurzen Buches, erchuettert und erhoben zugleich - und so dankbar, dass ich in meine Zeit hinein geboren wurde.

[Deschardons]

bon, j'ai pas été éblouie... pas inintéressant

[Timo · Rating 4 out of 5]

3,89

[nins · Rating 5 out of 5]

obsessed

[Michelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolute Slay.

[Rieke · Rating 5 out of 5]

omg, dadrin hat so viel gesteckt. bin richtig beseelt davon. unfassbar gut geschrieben. damn. (z-wort genannt, einziger trauerfall, aber ja).

[Antje Dahm · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of the first German feminists. Describing with
her book/texts the daily life of women around 1830-1919. It's now 2017 but her work is still shockingly current.