Shadow Child: An Apprenticeship in Love and Loss

by Beth Powning

In this perceptive, profoundly moving meditation on love and loss -- and the often poignant connection between the two -- Beth Powning shares the lessons that time and nature have taught her.Like many young women with career ambitions in the redefining 1960s, Beth Powning struggles with the decision as to whether, and when, she should start a family, although eventually her ambivalence about motherhood yields to a dream of a baby. At the age of twenty-four she becomes pregnant, and her dream becomes reality. Then, late into a cold February night, eleven days past her due date, under induced labor, Beth delivers a stillborn son.

Several years later, to overwhelming joy, Beth gives birth to Jacob, but the growth of her second son is soon shadowed by that of Beth's other, first child, who has emerged from the darkness of memory. So it is that she begins to come to terms with the conditions of life that hone and humble each of us -- with birth and death, with joy and pain, with losses and love and the relentless passage of time -- in this beautifully wrought exploration of selfhood, womanhood, and motherhood.

Genres: Grief

335 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2000

About the author

Beth Powning was born in Hampton, Connecticut. She attended E.O. Smith High School, and Sarah Lawrence College, where she majored in creative writing. Powning moved to New Brunswick, Canada in 1970.

Powning's work has been widely published in books, anthologies, and magazines. She is known for her lyrical, powerful writing and the profound emotional honesty of her work.

Her latest novel, "The Sister's Tale", will be released by Knopf Canada in both Canada and the US on May 25, 2021. Set in the 1887 maritimes provinces, it includes characters from "The Sea Captain's Wife" and concerns home children, suffragists, and women's rights.

Her 2015 novel, " A Measure of Light", was a Globe and Mail Bestseller, a Globe and Mail Best Book, long-listed for the Dublin International Literary Award, and the winner of the N.B. Book Award for Fiction. In the USA, "A Measure of Light" was a Sam's Club Best Book for March, 2018.

Beth Powning's novel, "The Sea Captain's Wife" was short-listed for the Thomas Head Raddall Atlantic Fiction Award, in Canada.; and was a Barnes and Noble Discover Award Book, in the USA. The novel has been long-listed for the International IMPAC Dublin Literary Award. It was translated into French by Editions Perce-Neige, with distribution in Canada and France.

"The Hatbox Letters" was also long-listed for the Dublin International Literary Award, and was a Globe and Mail Best Book.

Powning also won Canada's Lieutenant-Governor’s Award for High Achievement in English-Language Literary Arts and has been awarded an honorary Doctorate of Letters from the University of New Brunswick and Mount Allison University.

She has appeared at literary festivals across Canada, in Ireland, and the UK.
She lives in a 19th century farmhouse in rural New Brunswick, Canada, with her husband, sculptor Peter Powning.

Reviews

[Mandy · Rating 5 out of 5]

As I finished this book, I found myself thinking, "I'll need to read this book again someday." There are many layers here, not just about the loss of a child, but about being a woman, being creative, and what it means to live in the wake of that loss.

[Jayanti Banerjee · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beth Powning has a mournful voice. Some might call it reflective but I was struck by how, even when she was very young, she was aware of what wasn't in a moment. Such a voice, however, is exactly right for the focus of this memoir - her first, stillborn, son. He is the main impetus for the book - a working through of how to come to terms with such a death and the fact that these children are still there - a shadow presence - forever. However, there are other shadow children in this book - Beth Powning's many stories and other manuscripts that couldn't find a publisher. Many, important layers to work through - motherhood and authorhood...

[Renee · Rating 5 out of 5]

My favorite type of writing all combined: a good story, a mother's memoir written with gorgeous metaphor, lyrical prose, all grounded in nature and beauty. I read this with commonplace book in hand and savor each word. A Canadian Katrina Kenison. 6/5.

[Catherine Mccormick · Rating 3 out of 5]

For some reason I didn't love this book and it's usually the type of book that I like - memoir. The author suffers a stillbirth and a miscarriage and for some reason I just did not get emotionally involved in her story. I have never had her experience and I didn't relate to the book in any way. I am a parent and grandparent so it should have. The author is a poetic writer with a deep connection to nature - I did like that bit in the book. She writes really well. I am not sure why it did not resonate with me.

[Crystal · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so beautiful. Raw, intimate, and poetic. An inside look at a lifetime of internal struggles, finally realized.

[Stephanie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had this book in my possession (borrowed) for over a month before I could gather the courage to actually read it. At first I thought it was rather self indulgent and the language too pretty, but I think I was mostly scared to read what was there. But a day of waiting with no other distractions got me started and once I got past the idyllic childhood section I got hooked into her story - I think it starts off as "I was a smart and precocious child..." which really put me off until she starts writing about her loss.

I'm not sure I can recommend this to anyone who has not lost a child, it's an incredibly personal book and I don't know how it would resonate with someone who has not had this experience.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

I resonated with this writer far more than any other I've read. She generously invites her readers into her life of grief and healing.

[Karalee · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5