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Reclaiming Hope: Overcoming the Challenges of Parenting Foster and Adopted Children
*Honorable Mention Winner of the Royal Dragonfly Awards for Parenting, Honorable Mention Winner of the Royal Dragonfly Awards for Self-Help/Inspirational*
Do you ever doubt your decision to foster or adopt? Do you feel hopeless in the challenges of parenting your foster or adopted children? Do you worry that you really ARE a failure as a parent?You are not alone.Too many parents enter foster care and adoption without having accurate information or knowing what to expect. Of those who do, many find they don’t have the resources or support they need to do it well. Many parents find themselves inadequate, insufficient, and incapable of the task of parenting foster and adopted kids. These parents are often unable to find the help they need or too embarrassed to look. This book is for the parents who question their decision to foster or adopt, who feel beaten down by the judgments of others and themselves, and who deal with regret, loss, and disappointment. It’s also for those hoping to be better prepared for the adoptive struggles ahead.You can enjoy the new life and family you're creating.In this unique blend of memoir and guidebook, Marcy shares with you the lessons her family has learned parenting children through foster care and adoption, the problems that have nearly flattened them, and the way they’ve seen, and continue to hope for, good in each one. Marcy covers the greatest challenges, as revealed through her own experience as a foster mother, adoptive mother, and professional counselor. Whether you are considering foster parenting or adopting, or are already in it and drowning, or you just want to throw a lifesaver to a foster parent / adoptive friend or family member, then this book is your must-read resource.Reclaiming Hope gives you truth about adoption, foster care, and taking guardianship of children in a new and easy-to-understand way Breaking down misinformation fed to prospective foster and adoptive parentsFinding community to validate your existence, remind you of your purpose, and encourage you to keep onNaming the 10 greatest challenges of foster care and adoption, so you can align your expectations with reality (the stuff they don’t tell you about in promo videos, fliers, and information meetings)Help for the friend or family member who wants to support adoptive/foster families.Reclaiming hope when circumstances scream fear and helplessness.Follow the advice in this book and fostering and adoption can be a beautiful, wonderful experience for you and your family. It will be hard. But it doesn’t have to be devastating. If you’re tired of pretending you’ve got it all together or that you’ve got the perfect kids or that this is always easy… if you sometimes wonder if you’ve made a mistake… if you feel the strain of raising adoptive and foster kids on your marriage or on your own health, then keep reading.Together we are going to name these challenges, acknowledge that they exist, that they are hard, and that, at the end of the day, there is still hope. What’s stopping you from reclaiming hope in your foster or adoptive situation?Scroll to the top and click the “buy now” button
Do you ever doubt your decision to foster or adopt? Do you feel hopeless in the challenges of parenting your foster or adopted children? Do you worry that you really ARE a failure as a parent?You are not alone.Too many parents enter foster care and adoption without having accurate information or knowing what to expect. Of those who do, many find they don’t have the resources or support they need to do it well. Many parents find themselves inadequate, insufficient, and incapable of the task of parenting foster and adopted kids. These parents are often unable to find the help they need or too embarrassed to look. This book is for the parents who question their decision to foster or adopt, who feel beaten down by the judgments of others and themselves, and who deal with regret, loss, and disappointment. It’s also for those hoping to be better prepared for the adoptive struggles ahead.You can enjoy the new life and family you're creating.In this unique blend of memoir and guidebook, Marcy shares with you the lessons her family has learned parenting children through foster care and adoption, the problems that have nearly flattened them, and the way they’ve seen, and continue to hope for, good in each one. Marcy covers the greatest challenges, as revealed through her own experience as a foster mother, adoptive mother, and professional counselor. Whether you are considering foster parenting or adopting, or are already in it and drowning, or you just want to throw a lifesaver to a foster parent / adoptive friend or family member, then this book is your must-read resource.Reclaiming Hope gives you truth about adoption, foster care, and taking guardianship of children in a new and easy-to-understand way Breaking down misinformation fed to prospective foster and adoptive parentsFinding community to validate your existence, remind you of your purpose, and encourage you to keep onNaming the 10 greatest challenges of foster care and adoption, so you can align your expectations with reality (the stuff they don’t tell you about in promo videos, fliers, and information meetings)Help for the friend or family member who wants to support adoptive/foster families.Reclaiming hope when circumstances scream fear and helplessness.Follow the advice in this book and fostering and adoption can be a beautiful, wonderful experience for you and your family. It will be hard. But it doesn’t have to be devastating. If you’re tired of pretending you’ve got it all together or that you’ve got the perfect kids or that this is always easy… if you sometimes wonder if you’ve made a mistake… if you feel the strain of raising adoptive and foster kids on your marriage or on your own health, then keep reading.Together we are going to name these challenges, acknowledge that they exist, that they are hard, and that, at the end of the day, there is still hope. What’s stopping you from reclaiming hope in your foster or adoptive situation?Scroll to the top and click the “buy now” button
218 pages, Kindle Edition
Published November 3, 2015
81 people are currently reading
76 people want to read
About the author
Marcy Pusey
44 books35 followersMarcy Pusey is an award-winning author of many bestselling books for adults and children, an international two-time TEDx speaker, and the Founder of Miramare Ponte Press. With her passion for storytelling and commitment to uplifting others, Marcy loves inspiring her readers with powerful tales that touch the heart and stir the soul. She also enjoys helping fellow authors pursue their writing dreams by providing them with coaching, consultation, and publishing services.
Marcy has spent her whole life helping others. Through her work as a Certified Rehabilitation Counselor and Certified Trauma and Resilience Practitioner, she helps people discover the emotional tools and support they need to grow beyond trauma and embrace their lives to the fullest. Her two TEDx talks, “How Story Empowers Kids to Shape our World” & “You Are More Than Your Traumatic Experiences”, have garnered international attention.
Marcy is proud to lead a life of adventure. She’s tossed pizzas for a pizzeria, sang in a musical, advocated for families with special needs, made appearances in a few movies, and mimed with balloon animals at the Halifax Busker Festival. She’s also the mother of four humans and two pups. For more information about Marcy and her work, visit her website at www.marcypusey.com or www.miramarepontepress.com
Marcy has spent her whole life helping others. Through her work as a Certified Rehabilitation Counselor and Certified Trauma and Resilience Practitioner, she helps people discover the emotional tools and support they need to grow beyond trauma and embrace their lives to the fullest. Her two TEDx talks, “How Story Empowers Kids to Shape our World” & “You Are More Than Your Traumatic Experiences”, have garnered international attention.
Marcy is proud to lead a life of adventure. She’s tossed pizzas for a pizzeria, sang in a musical, advocated for families with special needs, made appearances in a few movies, and mimed with balloon animals at the Halifax Busker Festival. She’s also the mother of four humans and two pups. For more information about Marcy and her work, visit her website at www.marcypusey.com or www.miramarepontepress.com
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
January 11, 2019
Great book
I want everyone who loves my family, to read this book. The more I read the more I wondered how the author knew all of these things about my life. I was sad that it ended because I was hoping to gain additional insight from this wise woman :)
I want everyone who loves my family, to read this book. The more I read the more I wondered how the author knew all of these things about my life. I was sad that it ended because I was hoping to gain additional insight from this wise woman :)
December 7, 2015
This book is a practical guide to help foster and adoptive parents put a name to and deal with the struggles of parenting, a book that should be a must read for all such parents. It lays out all the main issues clearly in different chapters that are insightful and helpful and which start with a related quote. I would have liked the chapters to have numbers as well as heading, but that is fairly minor suggestion.
But it is much, much more than a practical guide. This book is a compassionate and heartfelt look into fostering and adopting, written by someone with a ton of experience in the area (including being a mom of two foster-adopted children). Despite sometimes heart-breaking poignancy of living 'in the trenches', it never turns nasty or judgemental. In fact don't think I have ever read a book so brimming with love and empathy.
There is so much I personally got from this book. Yes Marcy, we do need more 'real people'. That we all need to 'keep pouring' and that love is just one big beautiful mess.
But it is much, much more than a practical guide. This book is a compassionate and heartfelt look into fostering and adopting, written by someone with a ton of experience in the area (including being a mom of two foster-adopted children). Despite sometimes heart-breaking poignancy of living 'in the trenches', it never turns nasty or judgemental. In fact don't think I have ever read a book so brimming with love and empathy.
There is so much I personally got from this book. Yes Marcy, we do need more 'real people'. That we all need to 'keep pouring' and that love is just one big beautiful mess.
November 14, 2015
Marcy Pusey in her book, Reclaiming Hope, shares her story of fostering and adopting with such candor and heart. She doesn't sugarcoat the reality or gloss over the warts or romanticize the notion of growing a family through this avenue. Instead Ms. Pusey writes her story of loving her foster and adopted kids with a warrior spirit, and in doing so, other parents in her shoes are both being heard and being given a voice- a voice of courage, possibility, and hope. Ms. Pusey makes sure they know they are not alone.
However, I read Reclaiming Hope not as a parent, but as an educator wanting to understand more about the students and families I interact with who have a similar story. Through reading her first-hand account of trying to navigate the System, I felt deep empathy, and simultaneously anger, for everyone involved- the kids, the people trying to give the kids a secure and loving home and family, and the social workers. But Ms. Pusey didn't let me stay angry for long. That's not the purpose of her book. The purpose of her book, first and foremost, is to help other adoptive/foster parents by naming things/feelings what they really are, by encouraging them with honest insight and advice, and most importantly, by reminding them why they did this in the first place.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who loves, supports, and/or works with adopted/foster children and their families.
However, I read Reclaiming Hope not as a parent, but as an educator wanting to understand more about the students and families I interact with who have a similar story. Through reading her first-hand account of trying to navigate the System, I felt deep empathy, and simultaneously anger, for everyone involved- the kids, the people trying to give the kids a secure and loving home and family, and the social workers. But Ms. Pusey didn't let me stay angry for long. That's not the purpose of her book. The purpose of her book, first and foremost, is to help other adoptive/foster parents by naming things/feelings what they really are, by encouraging them with honest insight and advice, and most importantly, by reminding them why they did this in the first place.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who loves, supports, and/or works with adopted/foster children and their families.
November 10, 2015
Marcy Pusey's book tells it like it is. In a straightforward, candid way, she let's you know that in being an adoptive or foster parent, you are not alone. She discusses the trials and tribulations of fostering and the difficulties one faces dealing with a broken system. Despite the problems you face, fostering and adoption can and should be a beautiful and rewarding experience.
Don't let the bureaucratic obstacles stand in the way of this experience. Marcy shows you in a clear and easy to read way that the challenges you face can be dealt with and overcome. She wants you to know there is support available. The book addresses the feelings that arise during the fostering and adoptive process. She provides information for friends and family who want to help, but are not sure how. She does make it clear that no matter the challenges and obstacles, there is always hope. If you are thinking of fostering or adopting a child, read this book and by all means, do it!
Don't let the bureaucratic obstacles stand in the way of this experience. Marcy shows you in a clear and easy to read way that the challenges you face can be dealt with and overcome. She wants you to know there is support available. The book addresses the feelings that arise during the fostering and adoptive process. She provides information for friends and family who want to help, but are not sure how. She does make it clear that no matter the challenges and obstacles, there is always hope. If you are thinking of fostering or adopting a child, read this book and by all means, do it!
November 15, 2015
Adopting or being a foster parent is a wonderful choice many of us are considering. This book will help you understand the many facets and implications of this subject, in great detail, from the author’s perspective and experience. There are many challenges that come with this decision, but the author conveys her faith that everything will work out, through her hopeful, down to earth tone.
This is a huge decision in our lives, and we can not treat it lightly. Adopting or becoming foster parents has many implications in our lives, but also in the lives of the children involved. Parenting of any kind can be challenging, and adopting can be especially so, since so many other components are involved.
I highly recommend this book - if you’re contemplating this subject, the wealth of information presented here will assist you tremendously!
This is a huge decision in our lives, and we can not treat it lightly. Adopting or becoming foster parents has many implications in our lives, but also in the lives of the children involved. Parenting of any kind can be challenging, and adopting can be especially so, since so many other components are involved.
I highly recommend this book - if you’re contemplating this subject, the wealth of information presented here will assist you tremendously!
December 11, 2015
This is a very heart warming read despite the honest account of the trials and tribulations of adopting and fostering in today's world. The hard hitting realities of this area of family life are not sugar coated but relayed with such
practicality and passion from an author who clearly knows what she's talking about. If you are thinking of going down the adoption/fostering route this is a must read as well as for anyone who knows and wants to relate better to anyone in this situation.
practicality and passion from an author who clearly knows what she's talking about. If you are thinking of going down the adoption/fostering route this is a must read as well as for anyone who knows and wants to relate better to anyone in this situation.
June 14, 2024
Relief
Trying to navigate the foster care system as a foster parent was confusing. Books like this got me through. There was a time I thought I was going insane. I recommend this book to anyone wo is a foster parent or thinking about becoming a foster parent. If you are adopting a child from a third- world country, then I say this book is a must read. Being a foster parent is stressful. We all do it from the heart. It is a thankless job. The author included a free Action Taker Guide that is helpful.
Trying to navigate the foster care system as a foster parent was confusing. Books like this got me through. There was a time I thought I was going insane. I recommend this book to anyone wo is a foster parent or thinking about becoming a foster parent. If you are adopting a child from a third- world country, then I say this book is a must read. Being a foster parent is stressful. We all do it from the heart. It is a thankless job. The author included a free Action Taker Guide that is helpful.
August 1, 2019
Adoption fostering beauty from ashes devastating beautiful
This book was amazing and just what I needed. I admit the situations described here are very different from what I face here in India. But children everywhere are the same. Abd dealing with their problems is always frustrating, painful and ultimately beautiful. There are so many things I felt guilty for which I now realise I never needed to. A hard calling but it's so worth it. Keep up the good work, dear author.
This book was amazing and just what I needed. I admit the situations described here are very different from what I face here in India. But children everywhere are the same. Abd dealing with their problems is always frustrating, painful and ultimately beautiful. There are so many things I felt guilty for which I now realise I never needed to. A hard calling but it's so worth it. Keep up the good work, dear author.
April 19, 2020
Must read this
This book speaks to the experience of my adoption journey. As I go through my second adoption, this really helped me deal with the first time I went there and the overall pain and joy of raising and losing my first son to drug addiction. Needs to be read by all parents doing foster care and adoption.
This book speaks to the experience of my adoption journey. As I go through my second adoption, this really helped me deal with the first time I went there and the overall pain and joy of raising and losing my first son to drug addiction. Needs to be read by all parents doing foster care and adoption.
November 1, 2020
Excellent. Especially for those who are just starting out. Even good and affirming for those who have been doing this for a while. This portrays reality when one adopts and or fosters children. Of course living it doesn't replace reading it however it does a good job of explaining and describing reality of parenting kids from trauma.
June 20, 2021
Words of truth
Wpr,ing with children of trauma Marcy gives hope within the truth of the difficulty the parents and children face. Thank you for the hope, vision and tools you give in your book. Enjoyed reading of your struggles knowing I am not alone in this work God has placed us in.
Wpr,ing with children of trauma Marcy gives hope within the truth of the difficulty the parents and children face. Thank you for the hope, vision and tools you give in your book. Enjoyed reading of your struggles knowing I am not alone in this work God has placed us in.
April 28, 2019
LOVING THOUGH THE GRIEF
I wish I had this book while I was I was in the midst of foster parenting the 50 Plus children we fostered on the brief 6 years we did it. I would have understood myself, the social workers better.. This is an awesome, spiritual resource.
I wish I had this book while I was I was in the midst of foster parenting the 50 Plus children we fostered on the brief 6 years we did it. I would have understood myself, the social workers better.. This is an awesome, spiritual resource.
May 21, 2019
A breath a fresh air.
Marcy presents many of the untold truths of fostering and adopting. She reminding us of the difficulties, while also calling us and giving us tools to keep pressing on.
Marcy presents many of the untold truths of fostering and adopting. She reminding us of the difficulties, while also calling us and giving us tools to keep pressing on.
May 30, 2019
Raw and honest without being bitter. There is so much about fostering and adopting that is similar to raising a child with special needs. The things these kids have suffered and lost have an impact on their lives forever, even when they are adopted into good homes.
July 5, 2020
I started and stopped this several times! I finally had to put it down. I found the author to be arrogant and condescending. I quit reading when she wrote, that her children would never go back to the slum because they had tasted better! I could write a book on why this is so wrong!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 24, 2019
I like this book because it’s very relatable, but it needed more encouragement and positives to balance out all of the negativity.
February 19, 2020
Good book for perspective foster parents as well as current foster families. Read this as part of a CAP, but enjoyed it and thought it would be a good book for others to read.
March 22, 2023
Very helpful book to read and have in my library.
August 17, 2019
Wow! Someone actually gets what we’ve been living!
This is a “Must Read” for anyone contemplating a life of fostering or adoption. And even more so for those already
in the thick of it.
The harsh realities of the fostering life are laid bare - not to dissuade you from a calling, or higher purpose, but to present a realistic picture to offset the often gauzy marketing designed to lure you into what will undoubtedly be the hardest thing you will ever do in your life.
On the one hand, the stories might frighten off the faint of heart, on the other - they reaffirm that the “System” is horrible no matter where you live, and the world in which we live is so broken it takes good and loving people to step in on behalf of the innocent victims even when the sacrifices test you to your personal limits.
This is a “Must Read” for anyone contemplating a life of fostering or adoption. And even more so for those already
in the thick of it.
The harsh realities of the fostering life are laid bare - not to dissuade you from a calling, or higher purpose, but to present a realistic picture to offset the often gauzy marketing designed to lure you into what will undoubtedly be the hardest thing you will ever do in your life.
On the one hand, the stories might frighten off the faint of heart, on the other - they reaffirm that the “System” is horrible no matter where you live, and the world in which we live is so broken it takes good and loving people to step in on behalf of the innocent victims even when the sacrifices test you to your personal limits.
December 28, 2019
Great resource for preparing myself emotionally for fostering kids.
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews