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Plain-speaking Jane
Australian women like Jane. She says what she thinks. In an era when public figures talk about themselves as brands, this is almost radical. In her memoir, Jane tells us that: her life is not perfect; she has given up trying to control anything; her children are not geniuses; Julia Gillard is fine but she's not a saint; and in her long career in advertising she was bullied by some of the wittiest men in Australia. She also talks frankly about her battle with anxiety. For the anxious among us - one in three Australian women are affected - this memoir offers hope. By example, Jane shows us that anxiety is not a life sentence; it can be managed so long as it is identified and treated; it should not prevent us doing the things in life that bring reward and recognition, and on the other side of anxiety lies the ultimate reward: the freedom to say and do as we please.
377 pages, Paperback
First published October 1, 2015
10 people are currently reading
257 people want to read
About the author
Jane Caro
21 books260 followersJane Caro wears many hats; including author, lecturer, mentor, social commentator, columnist, workshop facilitator, speaker, broadcaster and award-winning advertising writer. Jane runs her own communications consultancy and lectures in Advertising Creative at The School of Communication Arts at UWS. She has published three books: The Stupid Country: How Australia is dismantling public education co-authored with Chris Bonnor (2007), The F Word. How we learned to swear by feminism co-authored with Catherine Fox (2008), and Just a Girl (UQP, 2011). She has also appeared on Channel 7’s Sunrise, ABC’s Q&A and ABC’s The Gruen Transfer.
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
December 27, 2015
Dear Jane,
Thank you for writing this book in your clear and honest voice. It was exactly what I needed to read right now, while I struggle in my early thirties with children and a career. Your story gives me hope that I can resurrect it from the ashes and advocate for myself as the industry expert I've become. I've only recently learned to let go of the working mother guilt that has held me back for so long. I too have fought with my own mental health demons, and had a life changing visit to Tresillian after the birth of my third child because of the unrealistic standards I had for myself, so your experiences with anxiety and the drudgery of primary parenting certainly resonated.
To see you looking back with clarity and acceptance on your ability to ask for help, and pointing out that the worse that could happen is receiving a no, makes me see how much I've been my own worst enemy . I grit my teeth and getting on with the job, while resenting the people around me for not working as hard I clearly am. The only person who gets upset about this, oddly, is me.
It is also so encouraging to see an example of a happy and successful family whose children went to public schools, spent time in care, and turned out beautifully not despite, but because of it. You rightfully surmise that challenge and distress, while we wish to protect our children from it, is what gives them the strength of character they will need to fight their own battles later on. No one sets out to do a half arsed job of parenting, but I hope I'm doing my children a favour by refusing to be a helicopter parent.
Your no-nonsense advice about finding your voice as a women in the workplace clearly articulated all the painful growing up I've had to do realising that no one is going to pat me on the back, tell me I've been doing a good job and offer me a raise unless I specifically ask for it. Working in the male dominated world of IT, I too have had to find the line between being a sweet and feminine pushover, and a confident manager who can confidently confront the most self assured man, but who wants to resist being labelled a bitch. I'm still working on that one.
It was a wonderful experience to listen to your story, meet your family and to see how you have grown, struggled, and succeeded. How the world has changed during yours and your mother's lifetimes, and how, painfully, it has stayed the same in so many frustrating ways. Your story has given me more hope than any book full of depressing statistics about home much more child care and housework I've been stuck doing because I'm a woman. I keep reading those books looking for an answer, and all they give me is a bad attitude. And maybe one day to, in my forties or fifties when my children are all grown up, the book inside me will be ready to be written too, when I have the maturity of a life well lived, because women like you paved the road before me.
Thank you Jane, from me, and from my children who are the unwitting beneficiaries of your wisdom.
Thank you for writing this book in your clear and honest voice. It was exactly what I needed to read right now, while I struggle in my early thirties with children and a career. Your story gives me hope that I can resurrect it from the ashes and advocate for myself as the industry expert I've become. I've only recently learned to let go of the working mother guilt that has held me back for so long. I too have fought with my own mental health demons, and had a life changing visit to Tresillian after the birth of my third child because of the unrealistic standards I had for myself, so your experiences with anxiety and the drudgery of primary parenting certainly resonated.
To see you looking back with clarity and acceptance on your ability to ask for help, and pointing out that the worse that could happen is receiving a no, makes me see how much I've been my own worst enemy . I grit my teeth and getting on with the job, while resenting the people around me for not working as hard I clearly am. The only person who gets upset about this, oddly, is me.
It is also so encouraging to see an example of a happy and successful family whose children went to public schools, spent time in care, and turned out beautifully not despite, but because of it. You rightfully surmise that challenge and distress, while we wish to protect our children from it, is what gives them the strength of character they will need to fight their own battles later on. No one sets out to do a half arsed job of parenting, but I hope I'm doing my children a favour by refusing to be a helicopter parent.
Your no-nonsense advice about finding your voice as a women in the workplace clearly articulated all the painful growing up I've had to do realising that no one is going to pat me on the back, tell me I've been doing a good job and offer me a raise unless I specifically ask for it. Working in the male dominated world of IT, I too have had to find the line between being a sweet and feminine pushover, and a confident manager who can confidently confront the most self assured man, but who wants to resist being labelled a bitch. I'm still working on that one.
It was a wonderful experience to listen to your story, meet your family and to see how you have grown, struggled, and succeeded. How the world has changed during yours and your mother's lifetimes, and how, painfully, it has stayed the same in so many frustrating ways. Your story has given me more hope than any book full of depressing statistics about home much more child care and housework I've been stuck doing because I'm a woman. I keep reading those books looking for an answer, and all they give me is a bad attitude. And maybe one day to, in my forties or fifties when my children are all grown up, the book inside me will be ready to be written too, when I have the maturity of a life well lived, because women like you paved the road before me.
Thank you Jane, from me, and from my children who are the unwitting beneficiaries of your wisdom.
July 27, 2016
Social commentator and author Jane Caro has delivered her life story (so far) in her memoir Plain-Speaking Jane. If you have heard Jane speak, or if you follow her on social media, you will know what to expect: this book is a commentary on feminism, the advertising industry, the media, politics and education. What I didn't expect, and what she has also done very well, is to depict both her experience of motherhood, and her struggle with anxiety, in an honest, open and refreshing way.
Like most memoirs that tick all the right boxes, this book is illuminating in a number of different ways. Firstly, as Jane details her working life, we are given an insider's peek into the (mostly then male) world of advertising and sales, with all the attached difficulties women experienced 30 years ago in trying to break into that male-dominated industry. Jane discusses the people with whom she worked, the ad campaigns she created, the culture of the powerful companies of the time. With a cheeky wit and a policy never to 'sit down and shut up', Jane stands up to some obnoxious, rude, racist, sexist and belittling men, while at the same time managing to dissect her own life (her mistakes and blunders, as well as her successes) with insight and humour.
The section on motherhood - her pregnancies and the births of her two daughters, the subject of abortion, the difficult life of a (paid) 'working' mum, and most particularly the horror of sick and premature babies - is raw and familiar. The idea that having a sick child, over whose fate she had absolutely no control, would paradoxically seem to lessen her anxiety, was fascinating.
And it is this theme of anxiety, self-esteem, confidence and depression that runs throughout the book. We see how she has grown from an inexperienced and uncertain young woman into a confident and outspoken champion for those less advantaged. We learn the value of asking for help, and what is to be gained by helping others.
While this is a memoir, and not a self-help book, there is much to be gained from its reading, as learning about the path of another may smooth our own road. Certainly much of the book had me thinking about my own life and experiences. The book resonated with me and made a lot of sense.
One of Jane's mantras is: 'Safety is an illusion and danger is reality. Terrible things can happen and they can happen to anyone.' But once she decided to 'stop trying to control the uncontrollable', her life became more manageable, more fulfilling, and less anxiety-ridden.
Like most memoirs that tick all the right boxes, this book is illuminating in a number of different ways. Firstly, as Jane details her working life, we are given an insider's peek into the (mostly then male) world of advertising and sales, with all the attached difficulties women experienced 30 years ago in trying to break into that male-dominated industry. Jane discusses the people with whom she worked, the ad campaigns she created, the culture of the powerful companies of the time. With a cheeky wit and a policy never to 'sit down and shut up', Jane stands up to some obnoxious, rude, racist, sexist and belittling men, while at the same time managing to dissect her own life (her mistakes and blunders, as well as her successes) with insight and humour.
The section on motherhood - her pregnancies and the births of her two daughters, the subject of abortion, the difficult life of a (paid) 'working' mum, and most particularly the horror of sick and premature babies - is raw and familiar. The idea that having a sick child, over whose fate she had absolutely no control, would paradoxically seem to lessen her anxiety, was fascinating.
And it is this theme of anxiety, self-esteem, confidence and depression that runs throughout the book. We see how she has grown from an inexperienced and uncertain young woman into a confident and outspoken champion for those less advantaged. We learn the value of asking for help, and what is to be gained by helping others.
While this is a memoir, and not a self-help book, there is much to be gained from its reading, as learning about the path of another may smooth our own road. Certainly much of the book had me thinking about my own life and experiences. The book resonated with me and made a lot of sense.
One of Jane's mantras is: 'Safety is an illusion and danger is reality. Terrible things can happen and they can happen to anyone.' But once she decided to 'stop trying to control the uncontrollable', her life became more manageable, more fulfilling, and less anxiety-ridden.
April 21, 2019
I always seem to agree with Jane Caro so I was pleased to read this book which goes some way to explaining her background and the development of her views. I was surprised to read that she suffered so badly from anxiety, certainly no-one would suspect that based on her public persona. The parts on the advertising industry were of special interest to me as I knew next to nothing about how it worked. The advice given to her by one of her counsellors was so worthwhile that I jotted it down, the book was worth reading from my point of view.
January 24, 2019
A great read about growing up in Sydney in the 70's, anxiety disorders, feminism and the advertising industry.
Caro has a way with words and a story to tell that we can all relate to.
Full review here - http://bronasbooks.blogspot.com/2015/...
Caro has a way with words and a story to tell that we can all relate to.
Full review here - http://bronasbooks.blogspot.com/2015/...
March 21, 2016
A really engaging and enjoyable read about work and motherhood. I loved the chatty tone and entertaining anecdotes, but this is also well-structured and well-written (eg the word "disinterested" was used appropriately - rare as hen's teeth).
May 8, 2022
The life story, to date, of a smart woman. What's not to love?
January 4, 2019
An excellent read! Jane Caro writes so well in this memoir that you come to believe she is a friend. Her discussions about her own struggles with anxiety are surprisingly honest for someone in the public eye and it is so refreshing.
This book helped me to understand some of my own anxiety issues, but more importantly, she speaks on behalf of many women trying to operate in the predominantly male corporate workforce.
There are so many great quotes in this book that I think I will be reading through it once again and writing them down.
This book helped me to understand some of my own anxiety issues, but more importantly, she speaks on behalf of many women trying to operate in the predominantly male corporate workforce.
There are so many great quotes in this book that I think I will be reading through it once again and writing them down.
October 3, 2015
Brilliant, especially for people dealing with anxiety and worry.
April 29, 2019
Inspirational and straight speaking. Jane uses a lot of humour to reveal a lot about her ‘fortunate’ life and the successful career that she generated through hard work and determination. She shares her hardest low moments during and after the births of her two daughters and her self-discovery journeys through therapy. Plus, she acknowledges that she was not afraid to seek help when she realised, she needed it.
A few of the practical take-aways: She learnt that she is only answerable for her actions, not her thoughts or her emotions. She is responsible for her own emotions, not anyone else’s and therefore it is not her role to make anyone else happy.
Several tips came from her therapist – if someone accuses you of being selfish, it is usually when you have decided to put your needs first, and the other is implying that their needs are more important than yours. She also learnt about boundaries – If someone wants you to change something that you are happy with, it is your choice to comply or not, if you choose to keep it, then it is up to the other person to accept it or to do something themselves as it is their problem.
Jane recalls being asked to work permanently in her temporary part-time position after demonstrating that she actually outperformed some of the full-time employees; she put it down to “if you want something done fast and enthusiastically to ask a working mother – particularly one who has just escaped from the non-stop drudgery at home”.
Caro’s clarification of mansplaining is wonderful. “It is often practised by people who are determined to keep their distance from you(many men are terrified of actually empathising with women in case it literally unmans them) by taking a superior position and telling you what you should do, how you should think and what your deepest drives and desires are. Yet with every word they reveal how little they know – not just about you, but about themselves. Most marketers are the ultimate mansplainers. They just don’t know what they don’t know. Worse they really don’t care to find out”.
The book exposes the myth about women’s equality in the workforce regarding opportunities and salaries, and explains why quotas are necessary to achieve a real balance in employment. Caro is also a champion for public school education and her children’s successful careers are an excellent reason why the state education system can benefit and reward students without the added cost of a private education.
This is an excellent read for any woman who needs some encouragement to be themselves and assert their right to be in control their own lives.
A few of the practical take-aways: She learnt that she is only answerable for her actions, not her thoughts or her emotions. She is responsible for her own emotions, not anyone else’s and therefore it is not her role to make anyone else happy.
Several tips came from her therapist – if someone accuses you of being selfish, it is usually when you have decided to put your needs first, and the other is implying that their needs are more important than yours. She also learnt about boundaries – If someone wants you to change something that you are happy with, it is your choice to comply or not, if you choose to keep it, then it is up to the other person to accept it or to do something themselves as it is their problem.
Jane recalls being asked to work permanently in her temporary part-time position after demonstrating that she actually outperformed some of the full-time employees; she put it down to “if you want something done fast and enthusiastically to ask a working mother – particularly one who has just escaped from the non-stop drudgery at home”.
Caro’s clarification of mansplaining is wonderful. “It is often practised by people who are determined to keep their distance from you(many men are terrified of actually empathising with women in case it literally unmans them) by taking a superior position and telling you what you should do, how you should think and what your deepest drives and desires are. Yet with every word they reveal how little they know – not just about you, but about themselves. Most marketers are the ultimate mansplainers. They just don’t know what they don’t know. Worse they really don’t care to find out”.
The book exposes the myth about women’s equality in the workforce regarding opportunities and salaries, and explains why quotas are necessary to achieve a real balance in employment. Caro is also a champion for public school education and her children’s successful careers are an excellent reason why the state education system can benefit and reward students without the added cost of a private education.
This is an excellent read for any woman who needs some encouragement to be themselves and assert their right to be in control their own lives.
January 13, 2021
An interesting biography by Jane Caro - which provides a lens into life in Australia in the 1950s onwards, chronicling experiences of her brand of anxiety disorder, working in a male dominated firms of advertising and her birthing and motherhood challenges - juggling career and children.Jane was blessed with privilege through her educational options, father’s connection and reputation and her experiences are of a white middle class woman. Raising children alone in 1970s without the support of a husband’s wage and family is my definition of doing it tough! I agree that Gough Whitlam must be remembered for free university for women opening up the possibility of a tertiary education and careers. Not sure we have marched as far forward to gain the ground we need for equality. There are many untold stories of women’s progress. I too am a fan of Elizabeth Tudor!!!
February 23, 2016
Plain and brilliant read
What an utterly refreshingly honest book. Makes me think that one tough cookie like Jane, can get through her adversity, with her anxiety, and move on, make her mark, mother children, get her career back, and claw her way through a male dominated world is a truly inspiring woman.
It's written with heart and soul. I love it
What an utterly refreshingly honest book. Makes me think that one tough cookie like Jane, can get through her adversity, with her anxiety, and move on, make her mark, mother children, get her career back, and claw her way through a male dominated world is a truly inspiring woman.
It's written with heart and soul. I love it
January 20, 2016
Always nice when a memoir has an indicative title. This is Jane Caro at her unapologetic best, talking with honesty, wit and compassion about life, mental health, the advertising industry and evidence-based decision making. Highly recommended.
April 11, 2016
I don't normally read biographies but this one drew me to it and I'm so glad I followed along and opened the first page. It had me from the first few lines and kept me right to the very end. Wonderfully written, with honesty and integrity, Jane Caro now feels more like one of my good friends.
January 3, 2016
Gutsy, fierce and unapologetic. Caro is an impressive lady. Loved the courage with which she has lived her life and the confidence with her career.
January 12, 2016
Very enjoyable read!
April 16, 2016
Enjoyed. I was in advertising during this time. Tough. Still is. Strong woman.
May 26, 2016
Enjoyed this biography but feel Jane underestimates luck and influence although she refers to the latter on a number of occasions.
Not bad as a bio.
Not bad as a bio.
August 16, 2016
Jane writes the way she talks and I enjoyed this book a lot. Jane discussed this memoir at the Mudgee readers festival during a great breakfast talk.
January 28, 2017
A rather surprising book. I knew it would be brilliant, but it helped me confront my own struggle with anxiety. It has given me the courage to ask for professional help.
January 4, 2024
Plain speaking Jane gets to be a bit of a pain.
June 15, 2016
Thank you Jane Caro. You are an inspiration to all women.
April 5, 2017
This was such an enjoyable read. Have read articles by Jane Caro, seen her on Gruen, and had the immense pleasure of meeting her in person (where we slightly bonded over our height, she said she was pleased to meet someone she could look in the eye when speaking) this book had a few things I knew but so much more. It is not just a memoir of her life, but of Australian social and cultural life of the 50s to the present day. I am 2 years older, so many of her anecdotes rang a bell. Her description of life in the advertising world for a woman should be standard reading for young women today and her time in the Children's Hospital with firstborn Polly should also be standard reading for prospective and new parents. I really loved this book. (and I'm rarely a non-fiction biography reader)
April 14, 2017
Fantastic read. Interesting, informative, inspiring.
Read
January 27, 2019I read this at least a couple of years ago, but realised going through my ‘want to read’ list for something to pick up next that I had not marked it off. I read it around the same time I read Magda Szubanski’s memoir and there were some interesting parallels for all they had quite different lives. Dealing with mental health issues while simultaneously holding down high profile jobs in male dominated fields for one.
I like what I have seen on Jane Caro on TV, and she came across as an intelligent and kind-hearted person who I felt like I knew well after reading this.
I like what I have seen on Jane Caro on TV, and she came across as an intelligent and kind-hearted person who I felt like I knew well after reading this.
Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews