I Can't Get Over My Partner's Affair: 50 questions about recovering from extreme betrayal and the long-term impact of infidelity

by Andrew G. Marshall

You'd think if someone was caught having an affair that they'd make a full confession. You'd think they would know if they wanted to stay or leave. You'd think they would be able to explain why they were unfaithful. You'd think if they promised to 'fight' for their marriage that their actions would match their words. But for lots of people recovery is not so straightforward and takes far longer than they would have imagined on discovery day. Sometimes the person who has been unfaithful vows to do 'anything' to make it better but the next day sabotages everything. Sometimes the discoverer of the infidelity is constantly besieged by horrible images or overcome with anxiety – even though they want to move forward. Sometimes the betrayal has been so great – several affairs, hook-up sites, prostitutes or cheating with a friend – that recovery is much harder. Alternatively, the couple's marriage was so close or they were childhood sweethearts that the pain is doubled and quadrupled. If you can't get over your partner's affair, it is easy to think that the pain is too great and you need to split up. However, Andrew G. Marshall has spent thirty years working with couples in crisis and has a message of hope. 'It's not that there's something fundamentally wrong with your marriage but you have been so profoundly hurt that you need extra help and to learn special skills to find a way round blockages.' In this compassionate book, he •50 case histories so you don't feel so alone in your struggle.•How to diagnose why you're feeling stuck.•The common myths about infidelity that make recovery harder.•How to communicate better with your partner and stop arguments going round in circles.•How to turn the pain of infidelity into something positive.

201 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 1, 2015

About the author

Andrew has been a marital therapist for almost thirty years. He trained with RELATE the UK's leading couple counselling charity. He now has a private practice in London and Sussex (England), gives workshops on relationship and inspirational talks. His books have been translated into twenty languages (including French, German, Spanish, Japanese, Chinese and Italian). He also writes for UK newspapers Daily Mail and Mail on Sunday.

Andrew is also the host of the podcast "The Meaningful Life with Andrew G Marshall" where each week I interview therapists, academics and people with a story to tell about making better relationships, deeper connections understanding yourself and what makes life meaningful.

Reviews

[Manintheboat · Rating 1 out of 5]

What a load of wife blaming.