The Loss of All Lost Things

by Amina Gautier

The fifteen stories in The Loss of All Lost Things explore the unpredictable ways in which characters negotiate, experience, and manage various forms of loss. These characters lose loved ones; they lose their security and self-worth; they lose children; they lose their ability to hide and shield their emotions; they lose their reputations, their careers, their hometowns, and their life savings. Often depicting the awkward moments when characters are torn between decision and outcome, The Loss of All Lost Things focuses on moments of regret and yearning.

Genres: Short Stories, Fiction

220 pages, Paperback

First published February 1, 2016

About the author

Amina Gautier is the author of the short story collections At-Risk, Winner of the Flannery O'Connor Award (University of Georgia Press, 2011), Now We Will Be Happy, Winner of the Prairie Schooner Book Prize in Fiction (University of Nebraska Press, 2014), and The Loss of All Lost Things (Elixir Press, 2016. She has published over ninety short stories. They appear in Agni, Best African American Fiction, Callaloo, Glimmer Train, Iowa Review, Kenyon Review, New Stories From the South, Notre Dame Review, North American Review, Prairie Schooner, Southern Review, and Storyquarterly among other places.

Reviews

[Brian TramueL · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amina Gautier is writeous. This is my favorite read(s) of the year.

[Urenna Sander · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lost and Found concerns what means the most to every parent, their children. ‘Thisman’ appears chilling. I imagined a gravelly voiced, fetid breath, licentious predatory pedophile: a parents’ worse nightmare. He kidnapped and shoved untruths at a young, impressionable child. His parents didn’t love or want him. He was now his father. The child believed him. The opening story is heart wrenchingly told from a child’s perspective; one of fear, confusion, vulnerability, sadness, and despair.

As I Wander reveals Judy has recently buried her husband, Gene.

Writer, C.S. Lewis described his own grief as “…love cut short, like a danced stopped…”

With love disrupted and her life dismantled, Judy felt displaced, and uprooted like a Wandering Jew plant hat entwined herself around anything that would let her. Like a homeless person, she grieved and wandered the neighborhood and nearby park. Judy had lost meaning and purpose. She exhibited deep-seated loss, more instinctual and uncharacteristic, when she embraced the arms of a stranger.

There is description and imagery to make the stories more believable. The Loss of All Things Lost is the loss of a couple’s kidnapped son (Lost and Found), which is almost like a death in the family. It immediately engages you. You can imagine and feel their pain as it addresses their helplessness, hollowness, and shakes the foundation of familial bonds, and almost the dissolution of their marriage.

Bernice, the mother in What’s Best for You has lost the mother-daughter relationship with her teenage daughter. They’re emotionally disconnected. She has ignored creating the link that bonds mothers and daughters for life.

The same could be said for Leslie in Been Meaning to Say. Widower, Leslie, seemed lost without his wife, Iphigenia. If he had developed a relationship with his daughter, Carole, during her formative years and adolescence, and had provided unconditional love, warmth and acceptance, the loss of Iphigenia would not have been as monumental.

Maybe Leslie was cold, distant, and uninvolved because Iphigenia bore Carole after 14 years of marriage. Before Carole, Leslie had treasured those years with Iphigenia. They were a happy couple. Evidently, his wife was optimistic and happy with their daughter. Leslie had not prepared himself for the hard work and sacrifices of parenthood. He had not wanted it. Carole’s birth appeared as an intrusion; someone that would not ‘get lost’ and go away.

I believe Carole suffered loss too, of a loving mother through death, and the loss of a supportive father-daughter relationship that had never developed.

Resident Lover After six weeks into an artist’s residency in New Hampshire, to complete her book of poetry, Ray’s wife dissolved their marriage. She would not be returning home. He accepted he had played a role in its termination and did not like her poetry or encourage her.

Ray experienced bouts of depression concerning his personal care.

Ray decided to attend an artist’s residency. He could complete a book needed to obtain a promotion at his university, and also meet females. A passionate, dedicated artist named, Felicia, attracted him. Yet he still yearned for his wife.

Directory of Assistance: Caroline had completed all her coursework and teaching requirements at a California college. Her lover had disentangled himself from the affair. She had returned home, and to fill the void, she took a non-professional position as a Directory Assistant.

Caroline appeared to be in limbo. Lingering were the destructive effects of her previous relationship. She had not let go, and appeared passive, placid and pliable with her trainer at work, a man not characteristic of He Whom She Had Loved, yet filled the void.

The stories are richly prosaic, full of realism and the loss one experiences in grief, love, marriage, parenting and abduction. There is the divorced self-indulgent mother, Vivian, interested in appearances and the opinions of others, but wants to rekindle the lost relationship with her teenage daughter; the Professor who has lost loving feelings for his wife, and is in love with a beautiful university student, Jasmine, and much, much more.

Ms. Gautier writes short stories that create immediacy and ease. They open at crucial points with central themes. Her short stories in The Loss of All Things Lost will make a significant impact on reading her future works.

[Vivienne Strauss · Rating 5 out of 5]

a work of pure genius!

[Bill Wolfe · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the great joys of reading authors with whom one is unfamiliar is discovering a truly distinctive writer whose work pushes all your buttons, intellectually and emotionally, and leaves you stunned, as if you’d looked at the sun for more than just that one permissible moment. In the last few years, I’ve experienced this reaction to the work of Molly Antopol (The UnAmericans), Rebecca Lee (Bobcat and Other Stories), Violet Kupersmith (The Frangipani Hotel), Brittani Sonnenberg (Home Leave), and Nina Swamidoss McConigley (Cowboys and East Indians).

[For more on fiction by women, visit my blog, https://readherlikeanopenbook.com/. Reviews, interviews, book news, weekly guest essays by authors, and more. Celebrate women writers!]

Amina Gautier is the latest writer to make me mutter to myself in amazement as I read her stories. Her debut collection of stories, At-Risk (2012), won the Flannery O’Connor Prize for Short Fiction. The follow-up, 2014’s Now We Will Be Happy, won the Prairie Schooner Book Prize in Fiction and an IPPY at the Independent Publishers Book Awards. Her debut focused on at-risk youth, while the follow-up examined the bi-cultural lives of Afro-Puerto Rican-Americans with her trademark combination of intensity and insight. Gautier is unsparing with her very human characters (and readers), but she is also compassionate.

Gautier’s third collection, The Loss of All Lost Things, is her best work yet. Here she moves beyond the concerns of her earlier work to the issue of loss in its many forms. Her characters have either suffered a loss, literally lost someone or something, or are at loose ends in figuring out what to do with their lives following a significant and often unexpected event. What so impresses me about these stories is Gautier’s ability to plumb the psyche of very complex characters with a psychological acuity that will break your heart repeatedly.

The opening “Lost and Found” follows a young boy who has been abducted by a man identified only as “Thisman” as they move from motel to motel over a period of several months. They watch The Twilight Zone wherever they stay. One episode teaches him that “this is something one can do with words, stretch them into softness and push them past their meaning. Take him, for example. He prefers the word lost instead of taken. Lost is much much better. Things that are taken are never given back. Things that are lost can be found. He doesn’t like to think of himself as a stolen thing, taken away in plain sight of his own home, plucked from the curb like a penny found on the sidewalk. . . He knows that there is a place for things that are lost. . . He remembers the Lost and Found at the school he no longer attends. . . If only he could find the Lost and Found and turn his own self in.” Only five pages into this collection and Gautier has sent repeated bolts of lightning through my heart and mind.

The title story takes us into the home and life of the grieving parents of the boy from “Lost and Found.” The opening line scalds.

“The posters go up immediately.”

The narrator continues. “They search in all weather; they harass the media for coverage. They leave the light on outside. They do not touch their answering machine: they keep the message exactly the same. They supply the authorities with recent photos, with medical and dental records, with everything they ask. They do all they can think of. They never rest. They never tire. They never lose hope.”

As the weeks and months pass, each deals with the heartbreak, anger, and sense of loss differently, and it begins to wear down their unified front and eventually their relationship. “Blame is the glue that keeps them together. They shuttle it between them, neither one able to shoulder it alone. . . They cannot endure this without each other. Splitting up is too simple of a solution. Far too easy to buckle under the strain of it all. . . They are stuck. Stuck here. Stuck in this time. Stuck together. . . Worse than mourning is this waiting that never ends.”

Gautier stares across the abyss of what is perhaps every parent’s greatest fear and suggests what might be found on the other side, if it can be reached somehow. After the supporters and media have moved on, after hope seems like pretending, the parents make a random decision which they are convinced is the only way to save themselves, their marriage, and the well-being of their younger son. Only those experiencing this loss can decide what is best, even if it appears illogical or pointless to those on the outside.

“Cicero Waiting” is a variation on this theme of parents coping with the loss of a child. “Intersections” explores the seemingly cliched affair between a white college professor and a beautiful and brilliant black student with results that manage to sidestep those cliches.

“A Cup of My Time” probes another marriage, this time that of young, expectant parents. Sona’s twin boys are “battling it out inside of my womb.” Her doctor advises her, prior to a risky procedure, that if it fails to save the fetuses, “the two of you will have a tough decision to make. You’ll have to choose which one you want to live.”

“Disturbance” is the odd man out in this collection, a piece of speculative fiction with echoes of Shirley Jackson’s “The Lottery” and Ursula LeGuin’s “The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas.” Gautier takes what seems like a domestic drama and stretches it into purely metaphorical territory with haunting results.

Gautier also explores individuals searching for the solutions to the voids in their lives.

In “What’s Best for You,” we meet Bernice, a black single mother who works in the university library and is lonely but maintaining her standards. When the amiable new custodian flirts with her, she is forced to confront the cost of her biases.

“As I Wander” finds a widow named Judy trying to adjust to her life following the loss of her older husband. She has lost track of the shape of her normal life. She spends the night on a bench in a local park, sleeping among the homeless. “She had lost her ability to find anything disgusting in mingling among those whom she would have normally avoided. . . Life had stolen something from them, robbed them, made them crazy and despairing so that they cared only for something to distract them. The park had become a depository for the unwanted, forgotten, and discarded.” Including, now, Judy. She seeks solace in an unexpected form with disappointing results.

The Loss of All Lost Things is a dark and often disturbing collection, but Gautier is such a gifted storyteller, the characters and conflicts so compelling, the telling details so perfectly chosen, that you can’t turn away. Amina Gautier is a fearless writer who I am willing to follow anywhere.

[Linda Donohue · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is not a book to read if you need cheering up. All of the stories are about some kind of personal loss whether it be a child missing or the death of a spouse. Stories are told from different perspectives and well written. You feel that you are right there with that person. I received this book as a Good Reads Giveaway and I thank the author/publisher for the opportunity to review this work. I look forward to reading further books by Amina Gautier,.

[Felicia Caro · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Loss of All Lost Things: Stories is a collection of fifteen short stories by Amina Gautier published in 2016. Each of the stories were featured in other publications, separately, before being collected and placed together within this evocative and meditative book. All of the stories, as you may have guessed, reflect on initial reactions, emotional and/or physical, that affect those who must come to terms, whether or not they'd like to, with loss. The losses in this book range from the disappearance of a child, the separation between partners, the dissolution of trust, the emigration of a family from a community, the broken bridge between friends, death itself... and so much more. Amina Gautier writes from an African-American perspective, offering words that share a glimpse into a world teetering on the edge of a particular subjective vulnerability, yet with such substance that I, while reading, had no doubt that I was secure in her worlds; I was on the inside, looking out.

Gautier's combination of slow atmospheric settings mixed with mostly hushed, muted voices and dialogue makes this book read, if not cozy per se, then settled, as if to tell us, settle down everyone, take in these stories. In a way, the scenes are almost set theatrically, but in one of those very intimate theaters. And none of the thematic elements become cliche. All of the stories have characters whose actions are not outrageous or overdone but subtle and full of intent; I have not seen characters such as this in fiction who are not represented as "sick" in some way. Gautier's characters were, at least for me, utterly relatable. They are not driven by unique personalities, but by their character, a character that each of them knew was not entirely up to them.

"The other night, she'd fallen asleep in the den, in front of the TV, while watching a special on lost cities. She'd tuned in just as a row of plaster casts in the shape of the human body was being shown. The narrator said that the victims were in situ, still lying in the positions they'd been in when they died. She'd powered off the television after that, unable to watch anymore. Now she imagines that their home is one of those homes in that Roman city that the archaeologists found lost under layers of civilizations and her body is one of the bodies they discovered buried beneath the ash. Her older son's return will be her excavation. That is when she will be unearthed and brought once more to the surface and to the light. Right now she is buried beneath the tephra, an artifact for study. Who will inject the plaster, the resin, so that she can take shape and discover who she used to be?" (from The Loss of All Lost Things, p. 27)

I am facilitating a book discussion about this book on February 22, 2020. As I prepare, I begin to look beyond literary style (in a word: contemporary fiction, short-story) and start to look more for parts particular to the stories themselves; their content, or seemingly distinctive moments within the story that might actually say something to each of us, something that an individual might not find isolating or, something they find separate from themselves yet still within his/her line of sight. One instance that caught my attention:

"The sidewalk is cracked in too many places to count. I step - carefully - around the section of dirt and weeds that sprout between the broken concrete. 'Excuse me', I say but no one moves aside to let me up the stoop. Instead I have to navigate wending my way through their space, squeezing around the bodies of these young black boys. Briefly, I consider getting back in the car and heading home. 'These are your own people,' I whisper, reminding myself. I knock on Miss Jefferson's door. The peephole cover slides back into place, and a woman's voice comes through loud and clear. 'We're not interested.' (from Navigator of Culture, p. 49)

The Loss of All Lost Things may not help us forgive one another, understand one another, or accept one another (though it should) but this lovely, melancholic book has a palpable, special way of freeing itself from sentimentality by finding solace in breakages linked by our common burdens (whatever they may be), as tough, yet gentle ways of saying goodbye.

[Kathie Giorgio · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well, this was a difficult one. I finally decided on three stars because I feel sort of lukewarm about the collection as a whole. Each short story was technically well-done. From a craft standpoint, Gautier hit all the right marks.

But that was the problem. They hit the right marks, all in the same way. The stories began to blend together, sounding very much alike. Academic settings. Academic characters. And very academic prose. If I'd read just one story, I would have loved it. But all together - it just was too much of the same thing. The tone was cold and distant, almost deadpan. There's nothing wrong with that, of course - it can work for a story. But for an entire collection...I just never warmed up to the book. I kept wanting to. But it just didn't happen.

But...it's well-written. And that's a plus.

[Katherine · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is beautifully written and I'm tempted to give it a higher score. But I found many of the stories downright creepy and near the end I almost decided not to finish it, so unsettling did I find it. No doubt others will disagree with me!

[Elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Refreshing. I found Amina Gautier's short story collection after meeting her at StoryStudio Chicago​
festival, and I'm so glad I did.

The Loss of All Lost Things is a wonderful set of stories that are a delight to read. Amina is also a master of opening lines!

[Insiya Gandhi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oh gosh, this book is fantastic. These short stories are so enthralling. Gautier so beautifully depicts love, loss, pain, and grief in everyday moments. Many of these stories are incredibly sad. Our characters experience so much disappointment, failure, and loss. Gautier’s work is a striking portrait of all the sadness, melancholy, and pain embedded in everyday life. My favorite stories were “The Loss of All Lost Things,” “What’s Best for You,” “Cicero Waiting,” and “Navigator of Culture.” Masterful.

[Marva · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Loss of All Lost Things, is full of dark stories about all kinds of loss. And, you probably shouldn't read this collection if you're feeling down because there's not much sunshine here. Also, you shouldn't expect to just read one and then go right on to the next. These stories require some time to reflect in between them. Some are definitely upsetting. But they are all well written, super tight and engaging.

[Lisa Houlihan]

I must have come across this while looking for a collection of short stories by a woman of color (for the Bookriot 2017 challenge) and confused this author's first name with that of The Hired Man, Aminatta Forna. It also fulfills the micropress slot, as the copyediting belies: "Ray lied down that night feeling optimistic" and "during the rein of William the Conqueror."

Sad as fuck. Good writing and characters, but sad as fuck.

[L.E. · Rating 3 out of 5]

The sentences that house other sentences are well written. The ones in between, not so much; they seem to serve more as an effect than anything else. Is that what the writer intended? Yes, I'm sure it was, but it is not my preference in serious literature. That being said, I don't think anything well written, of which this book is an example, should be "rated" with numbers or stars. But what are we doing here then?

[Scott Radway · Rating 3 out of 5]

I may have been misled by the introduction, which suggested that the stories would lure the reader in and then throw in an unexpected twist or troubling change partway through -- I didn't find this to be the case, however. So it left me underwhelmed until I finally accepted that my impression from the introduction was inaccurate. Overall the writing was good (some sloppy editing aside) and the topics of the stories were interesting.

[Jane Goodall · Rating 5 out of 5]

A superb collection of short stories. All are related to loss, whether a child, a spouse, a relationship, a different life, and others. They are all thought provoking stories, inciting emotions. All are well written with great character development. It will make you want to read more of her collections.

[Hamster · Rating 4 out of 5]

We don't realize that we lose ourselves and have myriad negative impacts on our surrounding people while we are grieving over our loss.
Every story whether you lost one or you r the lost one leaves you a message

[Ann Harleman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amina Gautier’s latest book left me happy/sad and feeling less alone in the world. Gautier is devoted to the short story form—The Loss of All Lost Things is her fourth collection—and she’s a master! 🙌

[Sammy Williams · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great collection of short stories with the theme of loss. Loss of love, spouse, children, material possessions, etc.

[Amanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

got this one on a whim at the library. I don't read short stories often enough; I prefer to race through longer stories and collapse at the end, spent and satisfied. short stories demand more pauses, more reflection throughout a collection. the loss of all lost things demanded that I find time to take a break at the conclusion of each piece. I am glad I did.

[Artemis · Rating 3 out of 5]

great story

[Luke Hillier · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm shuffling between 3 and 4 stars for this collection, the third by Gautier (both that she's written and that I've read). Unfortunately, it failed to offer the same captivating charm and resonance as Now We Will Be Happy that I loved so much, but that doesn't mean it's not a striking series of excellently written stories. The premise is interesting, following the lives of characters dealing with various manifestations of loss. While that thematic and narrative focus undeniably binds the otherwise independent (aside from 2) stories together and makes for a compelling enough exploration, I do wonder if straying from the very prevalent losses of romantic relationships and departed loved ones could have offered a bit more energy into the collection as a whole.

Along those lines, some of the ones that stand out most were those that did deviate from those concepts, particularly the two linked stories surrounding the kidnapping ("Lost and Found" and the titular entry, less so "Cicero Waiting" which has a similar premise). "Disturbance" is the most peculiar of them all, intentionally so, and marks the first time Gautier (to my knowledge) has embraced storytelling outside the realm of stark reality. My very favorite was "Navigator of Cultures" which deftly examines an intersection of class and race through the diverging lives of two Black women who overlap in an underresourced neighborhood of Bed-Stuy for a summer before one moves to a wealthier area and follows a life trajectory to suit it. Similar to her first two collections, this one showcased Gautier's ability to depict the realities of urban poverty with dignity and warmth without softening or sugarcoating anything. Interestingly, the majority of the stories here follow characters of considerable wealth, most of whom work in academia.

My critique, as others have pointed out, is the sense of staccato that runs throughout these stories. Characters are often depicted in the throes of passion or grief, yet we're almost always seeing them with undeniable restraint, formality, and at times even stiffness. This worked best when she allowed herself to go dark, exploring the aforementioned kidnappings or the nearly fantastical warring twins inside the narrators womb in "A Cup of My Time." But with so many stories more grounded in ordinary life, even centered around relationships, it would have been nice to offer just one with a bit more light and vitality. It doesn't help that virtually all relationships are fraught with disdain, desperation, or despair; by the end you're just wishing Gautier would relent a little and offer a bit of joy not stained by loss and locked away as a memory. Of course, I could just as easily credit her for committing so totally to her guiding concept, as the reality is "loss" is just about always painful in its ache. Either way, it's inarguable that her technical abilities as a writer are remarkable. Nearly each story is tight, elegant, and evocative, all showcasing a stunning mastery of language that make for an engaging, even engrossing read.

[Luke Sherwood · Rating 3 out of 5]

In one piece of Amina Gautier’s collection, a character sees a glimpse of a second chance, and actually seems to take it. In “Cicero Waiting” a teacher’s wife invites him to bed in a gesture so giving and so touching, that it stands out against the all-too-prominent self-absorption on display elsewhere. In “Cicero Waiting” a couple is trying to survive the loss of their three year-old daughter to kidnapping and murder. The father, who was taking care of the little girl at the time, cannot forgive himself, does not believe he is worthy.

These emotions fill this collection. The extremely human feelings of loss, guilt, regret, anger, and denial fill these pages and are very effectively portrayed. After failed marriages, characters (sometimes) grudgingly admit the possibility of their own partial fault. Others remain peevish or egotistical, or they deny their heritage, or they engage in highly ill-advised liaisons, sometimes even with their exes. The desperate guilt and loss some of these characters feel reaches us as true and authentic. This is Ms. Gautier’s achievement, and the proof of her skill.

The author sets most of these stories against a backdrop of academia, with tenured professors, respected specialists, and struggling graduate students. Ms Gautier does not shy away from depicting prejudice, or resentment, or self-aggrandizement, or confusion among this population - far from it. Her vision for her characters - and her undeniable success - is to set their raw, injured, or imperfect humanity on display.

There is a consistency in these stories. They’re executed well, their themes are set up and displayed succinctly, and some have a power to touch our hearts. And the author shows a solid range of voice and point of view, and she always suits them to her purpose. A solid collection by a young writer whom I will be watching.

[Renn · Rating 3 out of 5]

The Loss of All Lost Things was a New Suns book for our October 2020: Beginnings box. Read the full review here!

"This is what Amina Gautier’s The Loss of All Lost Things does to a person: it fills your head with bittersweet heaviness, pushes you ever so gently off-center with a finger to your temple, and lets gravity pull you down, down, down into contemplation... True to its title, The Loss of All Lost Things is a collection of short stories about various losses: of youth, of hope, of love, of relationships, of culture, of self. It is also an exploration of the ways in which we lose these things, through death, divorce, or distance, both physical and emotional. Parents lose their children to kidnapping or boarding school, people lose their spouses to sordid age-gap affairs, and well-to-do citizens lose their ignorance when confronted by the reality of class and racial barriers. There is a current of pain and sadness running through Gautier’s stories, which makes for a particularly poignant read at a time when all our everyday losses are so compounded by pandemic and politics...

As much as this is a book about loss, it is also a book about love, perhaps because it is the loss of love that affects us most as human beings. Parenthood is a prominent theme, as are separation and divorce, loneliness, and the search for meaningful connection. Gautier deftly avoids stereotypes and melodrama in her portrayals, but there is a resignation common to all of them, such that they all seem to bleed into one big story of hurting and having been hurt.

By centering loss and love in this collection, Gautier invites the reader to consider the things they have lost in their own life, and all the ways in which they continue to lose them."

[Richard Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Amina Gautier is writing dark, lyrical stories that are heartbreaking at every turn. She manages to extract sympathy and empathy from the reader, while immersing them in the narrative—powerful stories, that end with great impact. At the end of "Lost and Found" the final words echo out into the future, a pebble causing a ripple in water, the damage extending to the horizon. The boy is "lost amongst all of the other lost things of which he is but one." In that moment WE are there, part of the misery, the loss, the certain demise. One of many. The darkness expanding. This collection of tragic literary short stories is a must read.

[Gela · Rating 3 out of 5]

GoodReads First read WIN

I read this last year. Again don't know what happened to my review. I liked parts of this book but it was so unconventional I didn't really know what to make of it. I felt like I was prying in someones diary or daily journal. I will say it did inspire me to start jotting down my own thoughts. For that I would say read.

[Rebecca H.]

My review is available here: http://www.necessaryfiction.com/revie...