Redeeming Church Conflicts: Turning Crisis into Compassion and Care

by Tara Klena Barthel, David V Edling

Discover practical advice on resolving conflicts and dealing with crises within the church---and learn how to turn each situation into an opportunity for grace. In this hope-filled book, experts Barthel and Edling take you through the Acts 15 model of approaching dissension in order to provide a clear, godly way forward to redemptive reconciliation. 204 pages, softcover from Hendrickson.

Genres: Leadership, Counselling, Ecclesiology, Christianity

204 pages, Paperback

First published May 1, 2012

About the author

Tara Klena Barthel formerly served as the Director of the Institute for Christian Conciliation, a division of Peacemaker Ministries. As such, she oversaw the delivery of all conciliation services and advanced conciliator training. Currently, she serves her family as a homemaker while regularly mediating, arbitrating, writing, and speaking at conferences and retreats.

Prior to moving to Billings, Montana to join the staff of Peacemaker Ministries, she worked as an attorney and business consultant in Chicago, focusing on both high net-worth estate planning and change management. Tara earned her law degree (cum laude) and M.B.A. from the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign, and her B.A. in psychology (summa cum laude) from Augustana College (Illinois). As an advisor to advisors on complex estate cases, Tara formerly held licensures in finance and insurance (Series 24, 7, 66, IL Life & Health). Baker Books published Tara’s first two books: Peacemaking Women—Biblical Hope for Resolving Conflict and Redeeming Church Conflicts, and Peacemaker Ministries released her video series: The Peacemaking Church Women’s Study—Living the Gospel in Relationships. Tara also serves as an Adjunct Instructor and Certified Christian Conciliator™ with Peacemaker Ministries, and a consultant to businesses and Christian ministries.

Tara has served on three short-term missions projects (Estonia, Slovenija, and Outer Mongolia) and she enjoys SCUBA diving with her husband, Frederick. Tara, Fred, and their daughters Sophia and Ella are members of Rocky Mountain Community Church (PCA) where Fred serves as a deacon. Tara is currently enrolled at Reformed Theological Seminary where she is pursuing a Master’s Degree in Religion.

Reviews

[Andrew Krom · Rating 4 out of 5]

Using Acts 15 as a model, Barthel and Edling seek to help their readers understand and respond to church conflicts. Throughout the book, they incorporate stories from their own experience that help the reader get a picture of what this could look like. The authors also pull from Ken Sande's Peacemaker as they show how to redeem church conflicts. Any pastor would benefit from having read this resource.

[Susan · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book as preparation for writing a paper on the topic of followership, so I didn't read this entire book in depth. I skimmed it and focused on three chapters: "Shepherd-Leadership," "Biblical Followership," and "Accountability We Should Cherish." I'm researching followership in general for information that can relate particularly to the church setting. These chapters, therefore, could have been the highlight of my reading, but they weren't. (I found The Courageous Follower by Ira Chaleff far more useful.)

Some bits really touched me, such as this statement:
"Every person in a local church is an officer of Christ by the mere fact of membership. Every member of a local church is a leader by the mere fact of the interaction and influence he or she has with others. Even children profoundly influence the lives of others! We lead by example. We lead by teaching. But most of all, we lead by following" (p147).

The book reminds us that the New Testament section of the Bible has a clear stance that "All authority is established by God" (Rom 13:1, Matt 23:1-2), with specific references to how the respect/authority relationship plays out in the spheres of government, employment, the church, and the household.

I was looking for nitty gritty specifics on HOW to follow, but more time was spent on the fact that we SHOULD follow.

I appreciated the explanation for when thing go awry: "Even if a person in authority is selfish, neglectful, or overbearing, he or she is still entitled to respect ... and we [should] still seek to serve and look out for his or her best interests." I buy that, as well as the quick followup that "Showing respect and trusting our church leaders is an act of submission to God that demonstrates the depth and maturity of our faith. It is an act of trust in him that is bigger than the sins or mistakes of people, and he is indeed going to keep his promise to work all things together for our good (see Rom. 8:28)" (p149-50).

But the author (representing Peacemaker Ministries) doesn't give specifics for what to do when a leader's flaws become apparent beyond saying "that doesn't mean sins or abuses should be ignored" (p151).

There was a bit more time spent on the positive angle for demonstrating "proactive devotion" by affirming a leaders' gifts and strengths, being patient and kind with them (as God is with us), of "reach[ing] out to your leaders throughout the year to encourage them, pray for them, and bless them" rather than contacting them only when they are needed to perform a service (p153).

So it was much more high level than I'd hoped for, but still a good pointer for church members to get some perspective on the follower-leader spectrum.

[Brian · Rating 2 out of 5]

It's good to regularly read books on conflict resolution. To be reminded of the principles of peacemaking. But this book wasn't nearly as good as transforming church conflict. It also had a lot of assumptions like all pastors are male. And the book was claimed it was using acts 15 as its model for resolving conflict. And while it did use acts 15 during some portions of the book, the main organization of the book was around the peacemakers principles. I would read the peacemakers book instead. I read this as part of a Pastor's round table discussion group.

[Garrett Trott · Rating 5 out of 5]

Barthel and Edling’s work, Redeeming Church Conflicts, is an intriguing work. However, when reading through the preface and introduction, I was a bit skeptical. They state that this book intends to provide a biblical model for dealing with conflict. I had heard of such things, but I have never seen them spelled out in a manner like Barthel and Edling accomplish. My skepticism was unfounded as Barthel and Edling provide an excellent context for dealing with conflict.

This book is broken into four sections: perspective, discernment, leadership, and biblical response. These sections follow a model laid out in Acts 15, where the council in Jerusalem deals with the issue of whether an individual had to be circumcised to be saved. Barthel and Edling break down each section into four chapters discussing key elements necessary for each step to take place. For example, when they discuss perspective, they encourage believers to look at the conflicts (and the issues they are regarding) from an eternal perspective. They have no intention of glossing over all conflict, however, there is much conflict that takes place over menial issues and subsequently the conflict has more to do with pride, ego, and position. If one can simply see things from an eternal perspective, much conflict will cease.

Throughout this work, Bathel and Edling continue to connect conflict with idolatry. Idolatry is often portrayed in the Bible as individuals literally worshipping a bronze or clay figure. I think this ideology is often detrimental to the church because idolatry can be manifested through several means, including putting anything else before God, whether it is a position, money, or any other thing that takes priority in an individual’s life. Conflict often arises as a manifestation of idolatry, putting something (or someone) else before God.

[Annie Slagboom · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Redeeming Church Conflicts: Turning Crisis into Compassion and Care" is about restoration and redeeming Church conflicts.

It was hard to put down. The book is about redeeming people who are in the grips of agonizing pain that accompanies the breakdown of relationships. The Acts 15 model provided the structure for the book; perspective, discernment, leadership and biblical response.

The authors define redeeming as,"Redeeming church conflict; Redeeming church conflict means intentional dependence on the humbling and heart-changing grace of Christ's Holy Spirit by turning relational crisis in the church into compassionate care as you take every thought captive to him".

I appreciated "Redeeming Church Conflicts" for the authors transparency, their understanding of theology, through and practical explanations of 'how-to' which conclude with a "Mini-case Study". The "Questions for Reflection" and Recommended Resources for Further Study were insightful.

I highly recommend this book.

[Frode · Rating 3 out of 5]

Useful, that describes this book. The authors would make points and then illustrate them from their past experiences in helping churches. All churches have conflicts; they never cease although they may subside and be somewhat under the surface, so the book applies to all churches in some fashion or another.

Forgiveness and humility are high on their list. Owning up to one's sin in the situation and realizing that somehow each person needs to contribute to the solution are two good thoughts expressed in the book. Reality and experience show that it is rare that all folks will be reconciled even when the conflict is resolved. There is always fallout.

They lean on the leaders for most of the responsibility in a conflict. Either the leaders generate the problem themselves, or they don't handle it well if it occurs from within the rank and file.

The book is readable and generally flows along fairly well. I recommend it to any church.

[Matthew Hodge · Rating 4 out of 5]

You can never tell when you're going to find yourself in a church conflict and this is a great insight into what needs to happen to deal with the situation when it arises.

What I found most personally helpful about the book was the way it dealt with your attitude and behaviour if you're one of the aggrieved people in a conflict. It can be quite easy to become bitter in such circumstances and not wanting to act like a Christian or a good church member.

This book tackles that head on, stating what is expected in terms of leaders, followers and the people trying to bring peace. Well worth the read - especially if you can get to it before you find yourself in the middle of church conflict.

[Melissa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Conflicts!!!! Every church has them!! Redeeming Church Conflicts is a completely biblical and very practical guide to "Turning Crisis into Compassion and Care". The Authors take us through the story of conflict among believers found in Acts 15. This book is easy to read and understand yet more than once my own heart was deeply convicted. Perfect for church leaders and church members alike.

[Lori Schwilling · Rating 3 out of 5]

A conservative approach

I found some helpful instruction here that encouraged me to consider my part in church conflict. I gave the book only 3 stars because I found the theology to be quite conservative. Using Epistle passages about slavery and the submission of women to support a particular conflict resolution process strikes me as misguided.

[Deslynne · Rating 4 out of 5]

An essential tool for clergy