Whole: How I Learned to Fill the Fragments of My Life with Forgiveness, Hope, Strength, and Creativity

by Melissa G. Moore

When Melissa Moore was 13 years old, her father said to her, “I know how to kill someone and get away with it.” At the time she chalked it up to his love of detective novels, but it didn’t change the fact that her father had always been someone who made her anxious. Two years later, in 1995, Melissa’s father was arrested for the murder of 8 women over a period of 5 years—he was the serial killer known nationally as The Happy Face Killer. The pain, trauma, and shame that followed her father’s conviction could have left irreparable damage, but Melissa, now the host of LMN’s Monster in My Family, has spent the following decades pursuing a path of healing.

WHOLE is the culmination of Melissa’s years of research, interviews, and personal experience: A step-by-step program to heal from trauma and live a full life no matter what or who is in your past. Melissa spells out actionable steps for moving through the five stages of healing after a painful experience:

Watch the Storm (avoiding reactivity)
Heal your Heart (forgiveness as action)
Open your Mind (creativity in finding solutions)
Leverage your Power (using your pain to fuel your momentum)
Elevate your Spirit (paying forward gratitude, positivity, and love)

In each phase of the program, Melissa inspires you how to embrace your past to find your own wholeness within your "broken" life. If you are stuck in the rut of a painful experience—whether by depression, trauma, pain, fear, addiction, or guilt—you will find comfort in this book's advice, self-evaluation, and action plans. WHOLE blends together prescriptive advice with personal story and the result is a safe-zone for you to find your own path toward healing, happiness, and health.

Genres: Nonfiction, Mental Health, Self Help, Memoir, Psychology

256 pages, Hardcover

Published September 13, 2016

About the author

Melissa Moore is an Emmy-nominated journalist, as well as the Executive Producer and Host of Monster In My Family on LMN network.

She is an expert and speaker on the topics of recovery from trauma, domestic violence, and serial violent crimes.

Moore was raised as Melissa Jesperson, a daughter of the infamous "Happy Face" serial killer, Keith Jesperson. Growing up in a small town in Washington State, she survived the escalating trauma from her home life and the man she called father. Moore previously shared her inspirational story in the memoir, Shattered Silence.

Today, she frequently shares her insight and background with other families and survivors seeking healing from violent crimes.

Reviews

[Amanda (Books, Life and Everything Nice) · Rating 3 out of 5]

WHOLE is an inspiring story told by a woman who worked hard to overcome the obstacles created by a difficult childhood. The authors chose to write this book to bring to light all of the life lessons and research that Melissa learned about overcoming trauma. Overall the book is well organized, researched, and resonated with me. The acronym for the healing process, WHOLE, seems a little corny to me. The in depth explanations for each step in healing were personal, well written, and intelligent. WHOLE follows an outline similar to other self help books, but is more related to trauma and the complexities that come along with it. The authenticity makes the book. I really enjoyed the content about art therapy, journaling, and trusting your intuition. Also, I probably read too quickly, about 40 pages per day. I should have probably read about half that and also taken the time to really ponder the parts that resonated with me. I think this would be great as a buddy read with a trusted friend, who may be going through similar struggles in life. Comparing thoughts, journaling, and discussing relevant parts of WHOLE would help process and apply the content. In general WHOLE is a good self help book geared towards surviving trauma. The author is proof that trauma doesn't have to define a person and gives the tools to help work through it.

[tapewitch · Rating 3 out of 5]

Don't let the anagram turn you off - this has more content than most self-help books. She brings in the insights of many authors, healers, philosophers, etc - there's actually a lot of material and approaches to choose from. I found the first half (focused on acceptance and healing) to be more effective than the second half (more action based) - but maybe just because acceptance and the commitment to healing are experienced more similarly than the steps afterward that we take as individuals.

[Steph · Rating 3 out of 5]

I admire Melissa Moore so much for her honesty and willingness to be vulnerable. I read her first book, “Shattered Silence,” years ago and loved it so much. She is the daughter of a convicted serial killer and her life story is so powerful. This book is more of a guide to overcoming our own painful experiences and our own inability to see our strengths. I listened to the audiobook, but think it would be better to read the actual book so I could mark specific suggestions.

[Heidi]

For the most part, I liked this book...there were quite a few ideas for working through trauma.
The biggest gripe I have is that while the author repeatedly stated that she didn’t like having her famous serial killer father associated with her, she spent a LOT of time talking about it, almost as if she was proud.

[Amy Stilgenbauer · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is one of the more practical self-help books I've read in awhile. The exercises and advice were all things I could easily work into my own life. I've also developed a great list of books to read further thanks to Moore's recommendations.

[Cathy Patton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Inspiring and thought-provoking, especially the chapter on forgiveness.

[Lorena Candelario · Rating 5 out of 5]

At first, the book drew me in instantly. I love when I fall in love with a book at first GLANCE! I am not to keen on self-help books-I tend to think they're too wishy-washy. However, I deeply connected with Melissa Moore's words. I had a tumultuous childhood full of violence and abused fueled by alcoholism. This book has helped me jump start my journey in healing. Coming in terms with my past and forgiveness. I recommend this book if you want direction in self care. Also, to people who want an insight on what's it like to grow up in a broken home. So maybe they can help someone who's trying to put the pieces back.

[Shawna · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought WHOLE is a pretty good read with some good suggestions and stories. Melissa's personal story is very interesting and how she overcame it all is very inspiring. I learned alot of things that I will be implementing in my own life and suggest this to anyone that loves a good read that will inspire.

[Samantha Gunning]

I won this book via Goodreads First Reads Giveaway. I received an advanced readers paperback copy.

[Michael Yoder · Rating 5 out of 5]

I couldnt imagine going through this, I am glad you wrote this book. It was very good and I wish you luck in the future.